Donkey’s Vacation From Vacation-Itis Reading List & A SF Marina Sighting


The book selections for my week in Mexico.

I read voraciously … And about a dozen books at any given time. After a long love affair with my kindle, I’m back to print, mostly to give my eyes and brain a break from my digital device for an hour or two. That said, I’m missing the experience of not having 12 lbs of recycled tree in my bag.

What are you reading now?


A long-time basement dweller writes:

I was visiting the OMG Marina and walked into a posh vegan restaurant – and into not just a Donkey but the DJ with her.  She was prettier than I expected (despite scraggly hair and an odd belly-baring leggings ensemble, complete with Uggs) and bod looked pretty great, imo.  Fillers not super obvious, but the false eyelashes – as thick as whales’ teeth – were.  DJ Phwhatshisface was tall and in a wifebeater.  The tattoo is awful, but overall not as wrinkly/slimy as I’d thought.  Seemed quite into her.

I hung around a while to watch, while trying to explain to my friend what we were witnessing (impossible). They were very affectionate with each other, and the most exciting things I can share are that 1) yes, her voice is as loud as it seems online and 2) they did this weird prayer thing before they ate the food that came.  Hands locked together, heads bowed, whispering for a good 30 seconds or so, taking it Very Seriously.  Then the long, intense glares into each other’s eyes.  That happened a lot.

If I didn’t know any better, I’d assume they were two decently good-looking people in soft clothes who were in the earlyish stage of a relationship.  Hard to imagine so much crazy can fit into one person, and how (dare I say it?) average that person can seem IRL.  But seeing her – them! – really made my day.


Uh, better looking than Avocado but no thanks. Dig the shaved pits.

Bottom Picture Hall of Shame: The Nine Fans in the ‘Stans who liked Donkey’s vacation from vacation-itis post.

#3) Julia Allison’s Georgetown college roomie, a grad-u-ate with a career! Please welcome Cailleach Dé Weingart-Ryan – that’s quite a mouthful –  seen here front & center and giving it her best Blue Steel!


Posted in Uncategorized | 121 Comments

Ali Shanti’s New Piece?


Didn’t she just get dumped five minutes ago? Is Swainy off his nutter – we know he is – or is this woo (re)union really a possibility?


Bottom Fan in the ‘Stan who liked Julia’s vacation from vacation-itis post: #2) Hailing from rural North Carolina, please welcome Stanley “Stan the Man” Dankoski!

stan the man

Posted in Uncategorized | 43 Comments

Jess Johnson, Donkey’s BFF, “Makes A Journey Towards Self-Love” While Flashing Her Nips


Today is International Intimacy Day! Well…maybe not as far as the U.N. is concerned, but it is for me wink emoticon People who read my posts often comment and message me about the personal nature of my shares…and the way I share my challenges and insecurities as well as my triumphs and celebrations. The truth is, for me, that entirety of our human experience IS a celebration. I choose all of it, the dark, the light, the reverential, and the ridiculous.

In this interview by my beloved friends at Amant who have launched the most cutting edge and sacred platform for women to step into their pleasure and empowerment. They draw out a HIGHLY intimate side of my story around Finding True Beauty and truly stepping into my magic. It is an honor to share this with you. I dedicate this to all my women from ‪#‎FreeYourVoice‬ and all of you who have ever had a secret shame that you carried inside and LONGED to release. Let this one be for you, and please share with anyone whom you feel would benefit from this story. In devotion to our liberation heart emoticon ‪#‎LoveAmant‬‪#‎TogetherWeRise‬ ‪#‎TheHeARTistsWay‬ ‪#‎ShareTheMagic‬

The caterwauler proceeds to tag 34 people when sharing this “creative transformation,” i.e. haircut, so that everyone might tell her beautiful she is.

Hey, when was the last time YOU cried while getting your locks shorn?!

Check out Johnson’s transformation into magic at, where Ariel White asks such penetrating questions as:

After you shaved your head, there was a powerful sexiness that began radiating from you. How has your connection to your own sensuality changed since integrating and accepting this part of yourself?

Jess caterwauls us out, her nips at attention!

Bottom Fan in the ‘Stan!  We’ll be showcasing all nine folks who gave Julia a thumbs up on her vacation from vacation-itis post.

#1. Hailing from Cotonou, Benin, please welcome Pacôme Zannou. Happy Valentine’s Day, Donkey!


Posted in Uncategorized | 87 Comments

Here Are A Series of Photos of a Hard-Working Donkey During Terrible Stays in Her Various Stress-Prisons

Life is so taxing and difficult and onerous in the Stress Prison created and paid for by her horrible, hard-working parents. Poor thing!

At that rate, I would never take a vacation – and, frankly, I rarely have. In fact, I can’t think of the last time I’ve taken a vacation that hasn’t been combined with some kind of justification / work / intense personal growth (a speaking engagement, a consulting gig, an article I am writing, an obligation of some sort – like the wedding for a friend – or including the experience for the book).

highcomedyballerina shithead
dipshitdonkeyhee hawretardo donkeyweddingtool2NODEARGODNOPLEASENOJulia_Allison7trampodonkeywhattheeverlovingfuckwali julielazy asshole 2lady shalottelazy assholerainbowdonkey dipping 2donkey woopepnips37102_10100854092957675_3037088975593624756_njulia BMselfieloser

Posted in Uncategorized | 131 Comments

Alana Joy Pops Into The Basement & Sets The Record Straight


Hi Catladies,

A beloved basement dweller let me know I was mentioned here so I came by to see what’s what, and want to clarify some untruths I see floating around. This is TL:DR level, so for those of you who care:

I didn’t try to move to LA, I did move to LA. In November of 1999, before I had ever heard of a donkey. I also did not move to LA to be a blogger or internet fame ball, I’m pretty sure you can do that from anywhere, no? I also had never blogged before at this point. Not publicly anyway, though I’ve always been online and used to frequent LiveJournal…

In reality, I was 20 when I move to LA from Ft. Lauderdale/Miami. I was emancipated when I was 15 years old because my mother was all kinds of abusive. I went through a lot: group homes, foster homes, court cases to gain my independence from my mother and a broken system. Years of therapy, which I still attend because it’s good for you!

I wanted to move as far away from her as possible, somewhere I could create my own life that had nothing to do with my past. I did attempt music and acting and achieved moderate pseuo-recognition, but no kind of “fame” by any means. I really just wanted to try my hand at doing whatever made me happy and feel I was being creative, so that’s what I did. I’ve always love to write, make music, sing, was a drama nerd in HS… I just wanted a life on my own terms. I also worked in the fashion industry as a buyer and production manager, as I pursued creative interests.

Unlike a donkey, I have worked my entire life to support myself, since I didn’t have parents to count on. Hence my venom towards an entitled, spoiled, narcissistic, anti-feminist piece of shit. I started my first blog, a fashion blog, in the early 2000’s, I want to say somewhere between 2004-6 , which is when I first ever heard of a donkey. It was during the redacted era. I hardly never posted photos of myself or my outfits in any kind of “consistent content” way, nor shared about my life in great detail, so I’m not sure where the fameball BS comes from. Years later I was offered opportunities to host a web series on social media and a few other similar things, because that is the vertical I work in and I was prominent on a variety of social networks. Of course I said yes, this was great for marketing my services and establishing thought leadership to gain better clients.

When I created Life On Blast, which I remember as being well received by the majority of catladies actually, it was NOT meant to be a version of NonSociety. In fact the goal was to create a space directly opposite: that featured cool, creative projects and ideas made by OTHER people, and transparent dialogue about real world things we grapple with as we build our adult lives. At first I played with the idea of showing what the lives of a few actually hard-working, motivated women with unique careers was like in reality, because I hated how Julia presented a cotton candy, anti-feminist, filtered version of what the twenty something life was like. No pointing at shoes and notes in the margins: I was hoping we would talk about pressures, challenges, and earned victories. To motivate others and help them to realize that they don’t have to follow the same formula in their lives as whats presented to us.

At the time I was at the beginning of my career as a marketing strategist, (actually) working for myself. Another girlfriend wrote for a well known trash-mag, another was a production editor for an entertainment channel on TV you all probably flip through, another a makeup artist and stylist for TV and entertainment, etc. I never actually ended up implementing this aspect of Life On Blast fully, because I found it increasingly challenging to get everyone consistently creating content on a deadline in addition to their work demands. It was hard for me to manage on top of writing and reading content for the site and keeping up with OMG work.

Sorry guys but its annoying as fuck that if you create a website, make videos, or whatever… you must be a fameball. Some people are just ambitious with ideas and the ability to create a platform. I didn’t want to be famous I wanted to figure out how to make a living doing what I love, and I love to make things and share my story. I can see how that may appear somewhat narcissistic but that really isn’t where I’ve ever come from. My life has been unique from day one and I’ve overcome a lot of heavy shit. I’ve found it validating and cathartic. Not everyone is a donkey. I’ve always tried to give back by sharing my story, and continue to by working with organizations that empower young girls and abused kids, showing by example how you absolutely CAN overcome.

I didn’t get pregnant on purpose. It shouldn’t bother me now, to hear people who don’t know me or my life say this shit, but it does. No one can ever know what I went through. I started long distance dating my daughters father 3 months after I move to Oregon. He never did anything at all for my career, and at the time I was dating him I wasn’t making videos, music, or blogging consistently. I was working as a marketing strategist and my career had very little to zero overlap with what he could do for someone. I didn’t “move back to Oregon” – I’d never lived here before. Nor did I attend college here. I knew very few people in Portland and had zero support system. I’d met G at SXSW when I was there to speak (for work), a year or so prior to us dating. I genuinely liked him, we flew back and forth visiting each other for a few months, and then BOOM: pregnant. I was 31 and it threw me for a loop. I am pro-choice, but for me personally, as someone who had never been married and was only casually dating I wondered if this might be my only chance to be a mother, something I always saw for myself – so I decided to keep the baby, knowing I’d be at it on my own – G made that clear. The “wallet chasing” bull shit – REALLY? Tell me more. I got zero from him when pregnant, so supported myself fully through a pregnancy in a new city as a self-employed woman with very little local support. I didn’t start getting child support until well after my daughters first birthday, and what I do get is thankfully, enough to cover her pre-school so I can continue to work. It cost $60,000 in legal fee’s to get the child support order. You guys are so off the mark and its insulting on a deep level. I’ve busted my ass to get where I am, wherever the hell that is. G is no longer a deadbeat dad, to be fair. Once the judgement was official, he does pay what he’s supposed to and he’s been more involved with our daughter than he said or I expected. People grow to meet their situations, not all the time, but sometimes.

I have a career I love, a child I love, and a boyfriend I love – though we broke up last night so fuck shit suck, life goes on. But whatever you guys, I’ve never stopped peeping into the basement because I find myself occasionally missing the stench of cheetos and box wine, and Julia has always infuriated and disgusted me. I don’t even have the energy to rant about her anymore. It’s pathetisad at this point. I just wanted to clear up a few things about myself. Think what you will. Thanks to those of you who showed love. The rest? No1curr.


Posted in Uncategorized | 51 Comments