Another Helping Of Self-Help Slop Has Changed Donkey’s Life (Again)

“The Hoffman Process is a week-long healing retreat of transformation and development for people who feel stuck in one or more important areas of their life.”

That’s what a crucible does, Judy! But did this change your life more than Tony Robbins, Camp Septic, Jennifer Russell & Bryan Franklin’s weekend for couples, etc.?

Who PAID for the May vacation from vacation-itis? Surely Donkey wasn’t comped in exchange for an endorsement on Instagram? The scheme juices are bubbling.

134 COMMENTS

    • She was there in May but then jaunted to New York, London, France, and various California locales. I do wonder why we’re getting these manic posts!

      • She might be getting ready for a change. Deleting all her This Man posts will make her page look even sadder than it is. So she is posting these photos even though they aren’t exactly contemporaneous to ensure she still has photos on her page later. And to show she has had a life and been doing things.

  1. one donkey year = three human year; therefore for her, a one week hoffman is a three-week healing experience.

  2. Trying to prove to Sugar Dodi she’s THO much more evolved? Condition of parole? Plastic surgery cover?

    It’s been more than a decade; why do I still care?

    • Did he have to pay for the latest life-changing woo getaway? If so, surely the posts are to show the Marsons how evolved she has become in just one week. Bernie and Ellen, your future daughter-in-law will not be a costly, high-maintenance nightmare. Absolutely not!

      • It did occur to me that Dodi may have had to take a work trip she couldn’t accompany him on, so he kenneled her to avoid coming back to an impromptu commune in his condo.

        • omfg

          kenneled so she wouldn’t go through all of his drawers and emails, thus avoiding the f*ckin nutbag barrage of calls and emails while he is away.

          • Unicorn Studded Rainbow Named Shirley (NOT "Julia Allison")- 1st Ever Commenter on the New Site! 🎉🎊🍾 (NOT Ali Shanti/Alexis Neely/Alexis Katz)

            If he really worries about that, why does he still let her live there?

  3. Unicorn Studded Rainbow Named Shirley - 1st Ever Commenter on the New Site! 🎉🎊🍾 (NOT Ali Shanti/Alexis Neely/Alexis Katz)

    Fauxtochopped the fuck out of her torso

  4. one would think that someone who conquered feelings of low self esteem would not feel the need to show off abs in post plugging a program that cured said low self esteem.

    • “Holding breath and tightening abs” is the new “wide stance & skirt pull”.

      Tho evolved and transformed!

    • My thoughts exactly.

      Also, “first photo after____” – seriously? It was a one week woo staycation, it’s not like first photo of a newborn or first photo after having lost 300 pounds. Is this “first photo” supposed to be a big deal for some reason? It’s just a selfie of a nearly 40 year old woman.

      • Good point. Yesterday was the first day I got (as in received, held in my hands, not tasted) a package of kopi luwak coffee aka civet poop coffee that a friend brought for my mom from Bali.* FIRST DAY with shit coffee! I should have taken a selfie.

        *Yes, she spent about five days in Ubud, and yes, she confirmed it’s full of Donkey types.

      • Yes. Big Fucking Whip. Judy attended another expensive, extended self-improvement course so she could talk about herself.

        Look pretty for the picture, Donkey!

      • I noticed that, too! She’s so weird with times/dates/milestones… only 17 more days of being 32! We dated for 2 years [human time=14 months]! I haven’t had sugar in 3 and one quarter weeks! The third anniversary minus 5 days of grifting my first Care Bear costume!

        • Like many other things with Judy, it’s a liar / moron thing. Simultaneously equal parts.

  5. I thought maybe she had gone to a real psychiatric institute for real help but it’s just more woo shit. They even say that they aren’t a replacement for psychotherapy. How many real psychiatric institutes have their music available on Spotify? This one does.

    • The faculty page is a hoot. Institutes from which degrees were obtained are seldom listed and when they are, it’s usually along the lines of a fly-by-night online school or the University of Boise. It appears no one attended Harvard, MIT, or Cambridge, eh, Alex? I sure hope you weren’t suckered into paying for this slop.

  6. What was the stupid weekend in San Francisco where the healing chef was born? “You filled my heart, you filled my soul…”. That was my favorite.

    I am always excited for Burning Man, but double excited to see if Dr. Dadbod and Dadser esq. come this year. Or if she now going to play like she is a better more evolved Julia who would NEVER get married to herself in an orgy tent wearing granny panties. Never.

    • I hate that I know this, but that was some silly colored-markers-on-vision-boards dealio created by Donk’s former pal, Amber Rae. What the fuck was is called? Ideate, Accuate, Create… Hive, Thrive, Alive… all the wood names blend into one.

        • That’s it!!!! Wasn’t one of their “exercises” to pick up dog shit in the park? To give these spoiled wood a taste of what normal humans go through?

          • Yes, I liked that “exercise” best! I believe they even made plastic signs about cleaning up the dog crap. All this and Debbie’s cooking for only 3k!

      • Oh, and guess what… Amber Bray has actually produced a book, is doing podcasts, and calls herself a “guinea pig for self-discovery.” (Hmm, wonder who copied whom.)

        • Whenever that question arises, I bet on Donk. I have yet to see concrete proof that anyone ever copied any of her donkey deeds, but like all of us I have seen PUH-LENTYYYY of instances where she very obviously (and usually very stupidly) copied others.

  7. It’s $5,000 for one week. How does this unemployed fake consultant* pay for it?

    *A “business consultant” who has never had a business. An “advisor to start-ups” who has never had a start-up. A “media expert” with no website nor meaningful online presence. A “personal branding expert” whose personal brand is “has been” and “joke.” Is she a greeter at WalMart or night janitor or some other gig we don’t know about?

    • A “happiness expert” who has never truly been happy. A “change activist” who has no causes. A “catalyst for love” who had never had a functional adult relationship.

      • The Hoffman Ho House video on this post emphasizes how we often repeat our parents’ relationship in our own lives. To credit Petey & Robin, Donk seems to have done the exact opposite.

  8. “Back on the grid post Burning Man. It was like nothing I’ve ever experienced in this world. It changed my life.” — Sept. 2011

    Once again, for the deaf: “Watching The Man burn…it was like nothing I’ve experienced in this world. Five days that changed my life. I’m still processing.” — Sept 2011

    “You have changed my life forever with your vibrant expressions of ecstatic love [long list of the usual woos]” — Sept 2014, re her self-wedding

    “Who amongst you has done a Life Mission / Purpose / Core Values excavation exercise?
    I did one at Tony Robbin’s DWD that changed my life.” — April 2015

    “You have changed my life in countless ways.” — birthday message to Avocado, June 2015

    “Levi, you’ve CHANGED MY LIFE. Thank you, thank you thank you.” — April 2016, to Levi Felix, Camp Grounded guy.

    • I remember when some guy on Facebook asked her exactly how Tony Robbins changed her life and he got crickets.

      • Yep, wasn’t that the post in which she credited Robbins with helping her understand that she didn’t even have to write BOOK, or some such nonsense? That’s what a crucible does!

        • It was a question someone asked about recommended epic transformational experiences, and Donkey offered that as her most influential. When someone asked her toe elaborate she never answered.

    • And yet she crowdsourced for the date of Levi’s memorial service, only to discover it was the day prior! A classic Donkey boner.

    • “And yet, as silly as it sounds – and for someone who thinks most television is more or less imbecilic, it sounds very silly indeed – Sex and the City changed my life forever.” – May 2008

      “David Karp is my favorite! Thanks for the talk, D. And for Tumblr! It’s changed my life 😉 ” – March 2008

      “Happy belated birthday (it was yesterday) to a man who changed my life. ” – February 14 2008

      • Ew. That suck-up to rat-faced Karp, who shut down RBNS and caught shit for it in the NYTimes.

        Still sucking up to founders, Judy? Is that why your wikipedia entry was scrubbed? Is that why RBD is suddenly coming up at the bottom of page two and the top of page three in google searches?

        • Theothermccain.com is the article and site Donk should really be fighting against The things he said about her were only partially true and highly distasteful. That’s a sicko.

          • Indeed. That was disturbing incel sickness.

            We’re now solely on the third page of results.

            Scheme juices brewing, eh, Julie?

          • Are we on the third page because we don’t call her Julia Allison enough?

            Julia Allison. Julia Allison. Julia Allison. Julia Allison. Julia Allison.

  9. That pink dress with the ruffle might be the ugliest garment in her long history of ugly garments. I am wondering where she even found something this terrible. The colt, the ruffle, the sleeves…yeesh.

  10. So Donkey Trump is still blaming everyone but herself, and is continuing this family of origin BS that she was pushing with ILYRAIN, the same thing that drove her to email his estranged father and insist that he and his son mend fences. Because of course ILYRAIN’s childhood trauma was all that was keeping him from realizing what a supreme being Donkey was and that he should stop banging groupies on the side and just marry her.

    So now she’s again biting the hand that fed her all these years, and who likely paid for this $5000 band-aid. And now she can turn to Dodi and say, “Look, I’m fixed!” This whole “My parents didn’t give me enough attention so you must now fill the vacuum in my soul and parent me instead” is her go-to excuse for never growing up and taking responsibility for her own life. I wonder if she will ever realize that NGMB’s Prince Charming fantasy for her wasn’t a life map.

    Look at her happy brother and his family. Wasn’t it just a few years ago she was dissing their “boring existence” for the woo tribe commune alternative?

    She never changes. She’s a damn broken record. Get involved overnight and move in with someone, thinking she’s snared him, and when the façade drops away and her real agenda is exposed, she places blame everywhere other than herself when it doesn’t work out. She doesn’t need to keep looking outside for some magic formula to “heal” her constantly broken self. She just needs to create a real meaningful life for herself, stop desperately looking for eternal validation through vanity, and stop thinking marriage is her only solution.

    • My takeaway was, “Wow, this chick HAAAAATES her parents.” Yet she keeps cashing those checks.

      • Maybe Petey filed papers and declared her a church for the tax situation.

        • HA HA HA! She’d love nothing more than to be declared the Church of Love.

          Every self-improvement retreat Donkey takes, she takes for YOU!

    • She keeps turning herself into the woman she thinks This Man wants. Or That Man wants. Or The Man Before That Man.

      She doesn’t realize nothing can be more off-putting. Nobody wants that kind of resposibility! (I erased myself to make YOU happy, now you have to make ME forever and ever!).

      Also, who wants to be next to a 100% fake personality?

  11. I just can’t stop with this this morning. I had another thought: didn’t she drag the last few boyfriends into couples therapy almost from day one? I’m wondering if she tried this with Dodi and he wouldn’t bite. One person’s lifelong “healing journey” is another person’s narcissistic navel-gazing obsession.

    • She dragged Rain to everything, and he’s the only suitor who seems to have bought wholeheartedly into the woo slop – attending Jen & Bry’s couple therapy weekend doesn’t constitute legit couples therapy. She even wore dumb Devin out with constant woo therapies.

      • Unicorn Studded Rainbow Named Shirley - 1st Ever Commenter on the New Site! 🎉🎊🍾 (NOT Ali Shanti/Alexis Neely/Alexis Katz)

        Sounds like she was trying to have Devin Stetler, of the Easter Island Stetlers, brainwashed into marrying her

          • Unicorn Studded Rainbow Named Shirley (NOT "Julia Allison")- 1st Ever Commenter on the New Site! 🎉🎊🍾 (NOT Ali Shanti/Alexis Neely/Alexis Katz)

            He was comedy gold

          • To me, Debbert and BOOK are the two that got away. I’ll never forgive Judy for depriving us of these treasures.

          • You and me both, Helena. I’m still stewing that she flaked on BOOK.

            In spite of his Healing Chef and attorney at LOL clowning, I wish Dobbin well on his cannabis business (Flavors, Flavors, F-F-F-F-Flavors). I don’t think he’s a bad person at heart, and it’s hard work to get your community to accept a dispensary. Sounds like he’s doing it right.

          • I don’t think he’s a bad person either, but the memory of his Fashion Week pink bowtie and sunglasses combo or his Airbnb review of Donk’s stall will never fail to crack me up. As Unicorn said, comedy gold. Oh, oh, now I remember the sweater over a sweater! God, I love me some Debbin.

          • Unicorn Studded Rainbow Named Shirley (NOT "Julia Allison")- 1st Ever Commenter on the New Site! 🎉🎊🍾 (NOT Ali Shanti/Alexis Neely/Alexis Katz)

            If he was involved in the LOLyer crap, then I don’t wish him well either

      • Was it Rain that posted about talking to a chair?

        All the woos meld together in my mind sometimes.

        • Me too. It might have been Avocado. Rain did post some ridiculous list of all the self-help slop he’d read or attended in the prior year. If any of these clowns picked up the latest from Michael Chabon or Margaret Atwood, they probably wouldn’t be able to make it past the second page.

          • Sentences too long…. no pictures….. can’t understand…..

            (faints into smelly bean bag)

          • … book jacket has multiple colors and can’t be shelved anywhere in my bookcase … read in high school …

          • Lol wut? I must have missed that. I do remember, though, that some brilliant catlady wrote “Hope your childhood trauma feels better!” in reference to the missives manic Judy sent to Rain and his family members, and I have adopted that as my email sign off. (To a select few.)

          • Oh, Chad!
            – “Learning to Love Yourself” by Gay Hendricks
            – “Loving Yourself Advanced Program” by Gay Hendricks

          • “Some of the healing modalities I’ve done in the last year:
            – Somatic Experiencing
            – Yoga Nidra
            – Holotropic Breathwork
            – Neurofeedback Therapy
            – Shaman led 5meo DMT Journeys
            – Transformational Chairwork
            – NLP
            – Reparenting
            – Boundaries Exercise
            – Date with Destiny (Tony Robbins)
            – PTSD and trauma release counseling
            – EMDR (have not yet tried, but plan to)”

          • Jesus H. Christ, who the fuck has time to engage in all this nonsense over the course of one year?

          • The polyamorous exploits with groupies young enough to be his daughter aside, Rain seems Donkey’s ideal mate. He’s been pushing buttons on the same DJ set for the last several years; she was putting in an annual appearance at HIVE while pretending to work. And his list of self-help books and therapies? Only Donk is as narcissistic and has as much time on her hands.

            SHE STILL LOVES YOU RAIN!!

          • You are welcome, Helena! And Gilly, I think you are right that Donkey and Precipitation Man were better suited than the current pairing. They very likely spent 95% of their time navel gazing and smelling each other’s psychic farts. Donkey is addicted to this self-help shit, this wallowing in narcissistic introspection, and needs her fix or she implodes. From his social media history, Dodi doesn’t seem the type to indulge in this behavior, other than to sponsor what he thinks are worthwhile social causes. Oh, and stalk hot brunettes.

  12. More trans formative than that place where she “swept and wept”? Or Burning Man? Or anyplace where two or more goddesses are gathered?

    Methinks Hoffman Institute is a nice word for loony bin.

    • The “literature” makes it sound like a “your parents are responsible for all your current problems, even if they were excellent and supportive parents” bin.

      • If only Robin and Petey hadn’t made her attend public school, PAID for her Georgetown education, and given her that small gift of 10k upon miraculously graduating. Truly terrible parenting!

        • Education ruined her! It curtailed her genius.

          If only Robin & Pete had let her roam around the streets of Wilmette eating cupcakes all day instead of going to school…..

          • One of my favorite things about her BOOK (PBUH) proposal, and there are many, is how she couldn’t even keep her idiotic narrative straight in whether she was an all-A protestant work ethic perfectionist student, an active pre-teenage feminist, a social outcast who had to eat lunch alone (due to the perfectionism? feminism? make sense?), a sassy rebel with no respect for authorities, or an adorable klutz who never got a part in a school play and recited her own idiotic poem when she was losing in a debate (debate team 4evah!!1!).

  13. I challenge all these woo dipshit fucksticks to volunteer for a food bank, homeless shelter, a womens shelter, literally ANYWHERE that doesn’t involve smelling each other’s farts and chanting and self congratulating, what a TRANSFORMATIVE experience really looks like.

    Seriously, all you dumbasses reading here to cry over and get hugboxy content for your profiles, do something for someone else for once in your life that you don’t know.

    • Unicorn Studded Rainbow Named Shirley - 1st Ever Commenter on the New Site! 🎉🎊🍾 (NOT Ali Shanti/Alexis Neely/Alexis Katz)

      And do it with broadcasting it on social media

  14. In the comments to the above IG pic:

    thisisjamieleigh
    Yes, but how much does a place like that cost, and how did you pay for it Julia? I was commited against my will here in Mass for my mental issues and only got what the state gives since I am very poor despite working hard. I am sure many would love to know how you afforded that as for many of us who need help, can not afford it.

    Crickets, but of course!

  15. The first time I heard of the Hoffman Institute was some years ago when I briefly dated a polyamorous man (a FAILED Experiment in Happiness), who insisted that anyone he dated would need to go through the Process. So I googled and found it extremely woo-ish and absurdly expensive, then a bit later when I told him that things weren’t working out and that polyamory was not my cup of tea, he was enraged that he had wasted so much time on me (maybe 6 or 7 dates total.) ENRAGED, I tell you. So much for the Hoffman Process.

      • I was trying to explain est to a young friend the other day and she could not stop laughing, because it is ridiculous.

        • I vaguely knew of EST and googled it after reading the comparison here. They used the same annoying language, word choice, that the woos have driven into the ground and act as though they pioneered.

          Ain’t nothing new in Judy’s hippie lite, grift heavy bubble.

        • It was before my time, but my dad used it as a reference for anyone who was bragging about being too evolved to get their shit together.

  16. Unicorn Studded Rainbow Named Shirley (NOT "Julia Allison")- 1st Ever Commenter on the New Site! 🎉🎊🍾 (NOT Ali Shanti/Alexis Neely/Alexis Katz)

    Put it in your screen name.

    “Julia Allison” “Julia Allison” “Julia Allison” “Julia Allison” “Julia Allison” “Julia Allison”

  17. Gilly, I’m not your faux mom or anything, but I think you’re awesome. This place is a valuable source of COMMUNUTY.

    • The trolls and the attempts to close this site down prove that the evolved, transformed, re-born Donkey still reads here regularly and that she cares.

      #theycallmedonkey

      • Julia Allison Julia Allison Julia Allison Julia Allison. In perpetuity. Across the universe.

        • Julia Allison Baugher, fka as the Medstitute, will live on in perpetuity throughout the universe.

          #nevahforget

    • Thanks, dear heart. I’ve always thought the site is just silly fun with occasional moments of profundity. No one is forcing anyone to visit us sad, pathetic cat ladies living in our parents’ basement.

      • I’ve probably mentioned this before, but when I first heard of this site/cite/sight (thanks, Julie, for mentioning it on the OMG imbecilic teevee) I just glanced at it and left, because I didn’t get all the memes and in-jokes. You have to spend more time here and dig a little deeper to really get what we’re talking about.

        I returned to the site bc I was all, “Hmm, that dolt from Mess Despised doesn’t have anything to do with actual donkeys, does she?” (I love donkeys.)

  18. RBDers, please help us out and stop responding to the trolls. It is very important. Don’t respond to them. Thank you while we clean up on aisle DONKEY..

    • Sorry, Grifty. Will do going forward. It’s just so much fun to tweak the occasional Donkey WK. Hell, it’s the only thing I or any other woman miss about Smellsberg.

        • Disinfected and we’ll just delete anything else in the future.

          Wow. I cannot remember anyone this angry coming in here in a long, long time. Do you think s/he was Judy’s bunkmate at Hoffman Hostel?

          • Thanks for everything you guys do to keep the basement Donk-free.

            It was probably someone who couldn’t figure out why the Hoffman Institute was getting clicks from employed adults.

        • Oooh, is it the donkey herself? In a stall in Florida, using a VPN? Because she’s that fucking original, copying “Devin Nunes mom“ (a user handle on Twitter).

          • I would be oddly impressed if she knows how to set up a VPN. I mean, my 10 y-o goddaughter can, but she’s infinitely more tech savvy than Donkenstein.

          • See, I feel like a straw donkey VPN ranks up there w/ FauxtoChoppe wrt things she would actually pay enough attn to for long enough to learn the basics. I mean, that Donkapedia page isn’t going to edit itself every time and furthermore, how else might she send herself some emails, etc., from supposed frat boys, meant to make a current-soon-to-be-ex BF jealous?

  19. With another post on IG of her and a teddy bear I think that’s was her and she’s having a breakdown and he gone. She couldn’t be doing this if he was around. And she came here post bliss Nirvana workshop with peace

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