Updated: Sex & The City Nearly Ruined Integrity-Fueled Donkey’s Life

In today’s New York Post. Thank to Epictetis Joke for the alert!

Ten years ago, on May 27, 2008, I was on top of the world.

I was riding in an Escalade en route to the “Sex and the City” movie premiere in Midtown with a Bravo camera crew in tow. When the SUV door opened, I stepped onto the pink carpet in my Allison Parris dress and Chanel bag. I felt like a star. I felt beautiful. I felt proud. I was rubbing shoulders with celebs and the goddess herself: Carrie Bradshaw, a k a Sarah Jessica Parker.

Since moving to New York City four years earlier, I’d established myself with my own dating column and graced the cover of Wired magazine. I was a public figure who was regularly photographed alongside such famous faces as Henry Kissinger and Richard Branson. I went to all the glam parties, was fodder for gossip sites, had signed a deal with Bravo for a reality show, and dated more than my fair share of Mr. Bigs. I had been profiled in the New York Times, and New York magazine called me “the most famous young journalist in the city.”

I was considered by many to be Carrie Bradshaw 2.0. And I was happy to be given that identity for a while, but it was all a lie. At the premiere, I also felt like a fraud, insecure and embarrassed — like I didn’t belong.

I grew up a nerd in Chicago, more likely to duck into the library than talk to other kids at recess. At 12, I thought I would never be kissed. (Boy, did I make up for that later.)

I was a rising high-school senior when “Sex and the City” debuted in 1998, and I was instantly enthralled. I wanted to be like Carrie and her friends: I wanted to be glamorous and beautiful and dress well and have lots of dates. I realized I didn’t have to be a geek anymore. I could reinvent myself.

The show was my road map. Of all the die-hard fans I knew, I was the most influenced by “SATC.” At Georgetown University, where I enrolled in 1999, I started to wear dresses and learned how to do my makeup and curl my hair. The newfound male attention I received felt exhilarating.

I even started a dating column for my college paper called “Sex on the Hilltop,” which was modeled after Carrie’s column in the fictional New York Star.

When the last episode of “Sex and the City” aired in February 2004, I hosted a viewing party for 200 guests. It was my swan song as well: Eight months later, I would move to New York, where, armed with my “Sex and the City” DVDs, my transformation really began.

Based on what I knew from “SATC,” I expected the city to sweep me off my feet. I envisioned nonstop brunching and shopping.

It had such an outsize influence on me that — even with a very expensive degree in government — I said to myself: “I’m obviously going to be a columnist.” It seemed so reasonable and attainable. I emailed the editor of amNewYork — the free daily paper — no fewer than 16 times in six months, begging for a column, even offering to do it for free.

When that paper finally hired me, I made $50 per weekly column. I later moved to Time Out New York, where I made $750 a week — a huge improvement, but still not enough to buy Manolos and barely enough to afford the $2,500 rent for my 400-square-foot apartment in Hell’s Kitchen.

I lived on food bought for me on dates and the occasional bodega tuna sandwich. For clothes, it was wrap dresses from Diane von Furstenberg sample sales combined with loans from designers who took pity on me — like Betsey Johnson, who I’d interviewed at Fashion Week. Different men I dated gave me YSL shoes and status purses, just like Big did for Carrie on “SATC.” (In 2006, when I landed a six-figure editor-at-large gig at Star magazine, I finally felt more at ease with my finances.)

I also subscribed to Carrie’s ethos when it came to men. There was no such thing as a bad date — only a good date or a good brunch story. In my writing, I gave my boyfriends nicknames (one was “Prom King”) just like Carrie and her friends did.

I went out with a prince: Lorenzo Borghese from “The Bachelor.” I even dated the British ex-boyfriend of “Sex and the City” creator Candace Bushnell — the original Carrie. He was one of a few men who comprised the composite character Mr. Big.

In 2008, my two best girlfriends and I had just filmed a Bravo pilot for a show called “It Girls” (it wasn’t picked up). We were all invited by a 40-something billionaire to his Miami mansion; he even sent his private jet for us. It was just him, the three of us and his butler and chef. I don’t think this man was used to being told no, and he started chasing me around his mansion. I finally had to lock myself in the bathroom. The worst part: He sent us back on JetBlue.

Between 2004 and 2011, I filmed nine TV pilots — many of which were reality shows, and all of which were a derivation of some kind of “SATC” role for me. I was always the Carrie. In one pilot I hosted for Animal Planet, the premise was that your dog would choose who you’d go out with.

There were humbling moments. I can’t lie: I was devastated when Gawker tore me apart on a regular basis. They wrote about me as much as they wrote about Paris Hilton, but I had none of Paris’ resources to defend myself. Their core complaint about me was that I was a quote-unquote “fame whore.” They called me “one of the most hated people on the Internet.” They gave me infamy — and I didn’t want it. It was just ugly.

I needed a break.

In 2010, I moved to California, bouncing back and forth between the West Coast and New York for a couple of years.

Then, in 2011, one of my pilots was finally picked up by Bravo. The whole concept of “Miss Advised” was “real-life Carrie Bradshaw.” It was about three single women in three different cities, and I was the dating columnist for Elle in Los Angeles. It was “SATC” meets journalism. Producers sent me to a mind architect, a love coach and a witch in the pursuit of love.

But it came too late: In my heart, I was finished trying to be Carrie. When the show wasn’t renewed for a second season, I was relieved. The experience made me really look at myself: I was trying so hard to be liked that it was coming across as inauthentic and bitchy. Also, it was miserable to have cameras around all the time.

Finally, I cut my ties to New York and moved to San Francisco full time in 2013. I tried being a tech columnist and writing a personal-growth book called the “Experiments in Happiness.” Finally, I decided to go private for a while. I stopped blogging and writing. I rarely post on Instagram.

These days I work as a change activist, mounting summits for world leaders and serving as an adviser to startups and entrepreneurs looking to better the planet. I’m finally living a life of integrity, and I’m attuned to my values. I never heard about values on “Sex and the City.”

I dated a woman for a while, a beautiful entrepreneur who was also jilted by New York — that’s definitely not something you saw Carrie do. But dating is not front and center of my life anymore, although it was all I talked about in my 20s. That’s pretty one-dimensional.

Last year, I ended a two-year relationship with a man who ultimately couldn’t commit and wanted to be polyamorous. Again, “SATC” and the “lessons” it taught me, is the culprit. The show wasn’t a rubric on how to find a lifelong partnership. If I was more grounded and had honestly assessed whether or not this man was a good partner for me, I don’t think we ever would have dated.

Crushed and needing to regroup, I took a sabbatical and lived in Bali for eight months on a healing journey. I was also celibate during my time there.

I do wonder what my life would have looked like if “Sex and the City” had never come across my consciousness. Perhaps I’d be married with children now? Who knows, but I can say for sure that, as clever and aesthetically pleasing as the show was — and, as much as I agree with its value of female friendships — it showed too much consumerism and fear of intimacy disguised as empowerment.

It’s like candy: in the moment it feels good to eat it but, afterward, you feel sick. Who you’re dating, what you’re wearing, or how good you look at that premiere — none of that s - - t matters unless you genuinely love yourself. Solid relationships are what really matter.

Truth be told, I wish I had never heard of “SATC.” I’m sure there are worse role models but, for me, it did permanent and measurable damage to my psyche that I’m still cleaning up.

Sure, I could have been a dating columnist for the rest of my life but, honestly, I gave really bad dating advice — and so did Carrie Bradshaw.

I want to be a different role model from the one I got. Two months ago, I started seeing someone I never would have dated 10 years earlier. Back then, I wasn’t looking to get married or seek a lifelong partner, and that was a mistake. This man is a very reasonable choice, and I’m at a place in my life where reasonable is very sexy.

I’ve put away the pink party dress. The designer shoes and bags are in storage. Now, I feel like genuine me — I’m no longer a Carrie Bradshaw knockoff.

Wow. Just. Wow. I counted at least five whopper lies when just skimming this dreck. Mounting summits for world leaders? BWA HA HA! Looking forward to the new BOOK, Donkey!

Update: There’s been so much traffic on the site, bunnies, that we’ve crashed three times! The Twittersphere is ripping Donkey to shreds, The Daily Fail picked up Judy’s whine, and Slate is threatening to do a podcast of her shady timeline.

Donkey and Debbie are so Carrie and Misha!

340 COMMENTS

  1. She’s still trying to play up the bi angle. “I dated a woman for a while, a beautiful [of course] entrepreneur [of course] who was also jilted by New York — that’s definitely not something you saw Carrie do.” Tho cutting edge, our donk!

    • Samantha dated a woman (played by Brazilian goddess Sonia Braga) at some point.

      Shut up, you ignorant Donkey.

      • No idea. According to Myka McLaughlin, they only ever kissed. Like sorority sisters.

        Donkey could easily be dissembling, including the “new man” denouement. We’ve been hearing lots of behind the scenes stories and new OMG! boyfriend isn’t one of them.

  2. So…. “reasonable choice” is the new “base model”?

    I’d be so pissed if someone I am seeing called me “a reasonable choice”, it sounds so condescending and diminishing. “You wouldn’t be my first choice but you are the *reasonable* choice, I guess you’ll do”. Wow, so many words to prove that she never changes.

    • It’s probably horseshit and I’m privy to lot of intel that we can’t post on here. Plus, the “new man in my life” ending is how she ends every goddamn thing she writes. It’s even how she planned on ending BOOK. “Nutty Granny Money Bags sent Ichabod Crane to me!”

      • Just noted that the article is attributed to Doree Lewak. Writing in Donk’s voice? Well, at least the thing wouldn’t take 75 drafts and six months to publish.

        • I pity the poor underpaid goon who’s tasked with transcribing a donkey’s monologue and making it readable for an audience. Not enough freelance fees can compensate the emotional scars.

          • I wonder how many “Is” were in there prior to editing. Overall, pretty tortured prose and yes, the lies, so many lies.

            Also, my sincere condolences to Mr. Reasonable Choice, should he exist. Until it was finally a Dr. Gary type (she still around, btw?) That would change everything.

          • You are still around, then!
            Anything you’d like to share w/ the class, good doctor? ?

        • I WAS surprised to note the lack of unfunny tee-hee parentheses, pointless cringy you-hoos and “found a newfound example of this exemplary thing” bullshit. Also, no mention of Dadsers being a lawyer, WTF? Now it makes sense. Poor Doree, whoever she is.

          • Do you think poor Doree fact checked any Pancakes claim – “We talked marriage” – with Team Cindy?

          • I hope Team Cindy put some sort of mute on donkey braying.

          • I think Doree had that shite tucked away for a lazy weekend. She didn’t even mention Cynthia Nixon running for mayor, not that there’s a comparison to be made between Donk & IRL SATC people doing actual things of note.

        • It means it’s an “as told to.” Did many of these for the Post. Lewak probably interviewed her over the phone, but then wrote it out herself to create a narrative, hewing it a bit to the Post’s voice for fit.

          • So how does this work? Did she pitch the story? Is this something she may have pitched to multiple,places? Would she be paid for this? How much does this bring? I’m very curious.

          • I understand. I’m just wondering how it got to Lewak, and how much each person would be paid for something like this. Someone had to pitch the story to someone. And the use of “in tow” and a few other clues, including posting it as a first party voiced story, leads me to believe that Donkey submitted a draft that they heavily edited vs. put together via a phone interview.

          • Did she call them 16 times, Gilly?
            ::wonky face emoticon:: *

            *iPad’s own edit & it stays

  3. Throwing ILYRAIN under the bus! The emotionally healthy Donkey that I am today! Dating someone, so suck it!

    And the NY Post! *snerk* Next stop: Nat’l Enquirer.

    • I always thought that a straight man that takes so much care of his appearance, like ILYR does, has to be f-ing around.

      Call it polyamory, fear of commitment, travelling-DJ lifestyle or whatever, but the dude was f-ing around and was not going to stop.

      Now if she only listened to all the good advice we give her…..

      I STILL LOVE YOU RAIN!!

      • “If they did it with you, they’ll do it to you.”

        Important learn button info she conveniently ignored thinking she was tho thpecial.

    • I wasn’t far off with the next step: the Daily Fail is about on the same tabloidy par as the Enquirer.

      • Why didn’t a screenshot of this atrocity appear among the fauxtos in the Daily Fail ripoff? Very disappointed , Rupert!

  4. “Two months ago, I started seeing someone I never would have dated 10 years earlier. Back then, I wasn’t looking to get married or seek a lifelong partner, and that was a mistake. This man is a very reasonable choice, and I’m at a place in my life where reasonable is very sexy.”

    Ha. She’s at a place where “fertile and employed” is very sexy.

    • Since when wasn’t she EVER not looking for marriage or a lifelong partner? And the Indiana U, Living in parents condo, and digital nomad phase, getting blackballs by Fox, fired by Star, fired by Tribune, fuck you money, sideways Tumblr Page, and much more is all left out of this sad little bio full of lies, omissions and half truths. I wonder if Donkey will be invited to advise world leaders in Sinagapore on the 12th? One would have to wonder how she ever lands world-leader advisory gigs with a resume as vacuous as this one.

    • Transbraytion:

      “For the last two months ago I have been cyberstalking some random dude on facebook. We finally met for coffee and I have him a blow job in the Dunkin Donuts parking lot.
      After two days, he stopped returning my texts but the other day he finally replied with ‘oh hi’.
      He is no catch, but I am so desperate that I am going to tell the world about him next time a sucker publishes one of my columns”

    • This is also bullshit, as usual. Remember Harvard Harley? That was about 10 years ago, she made a big production out of being tired of dating and wanting to settle down, set her sights on him, weirded him the fuck out, he fled for the hills as they all did and as they all still do.

      She’s been trying to lock down a man since Lodwick. Her life is a constant cycle of forcing herself upon men, insisting they are TALKING MARRIAGE, having her ass dumped, revelling in the melodrama, going psycho behind the scenes on them and their new partners, lather fucking rinse and repeat.

      SO MANY LIES.

  5. BOY HOWDY. I’ve been reading through the 2009 archives of RBNS for shits and grins lately so I’ve been reveling in the SATC mania at its prime (well, after she got poofy.) (On a sidenote, the authors of this blog and its commenters have been the funniest, most insightful group of angry, sort of sad adults on the web for more than a decade. Highly recommend the archives). Pretty sure the Miami bachelor was Dan Loeb; she didn’t mention having to lock herself away from him while she was taking blurry photos of fauxga for him days later. Also, the YSL shoes were purportedly purchased for her by a fan who made the offer after she tweeted about wanting them and being unable to afford them. Nice to finally have confirmation that she was, as long suspected, a hooker.

    • Okay, on reflection, maybe this is a different billionaire. Dan Loeb was the Europe private jet.

      Still a hooker though.

      • Yes, that was when she “attended” Davos !
        So important! Journalist on the go!

        (Cringe for this entire article! Sooooo not relavant!!)

    • I asked above: Do you think poor Doree Lewak fact checked any Pancakes claim – “We talked marriage” – with Team Cindy?

    • I think everyone can agree that the McCain family has suffered enough lately.

      • I bet she wrote about it but they edited it out. She never misses dropping that name.

        • Yep, you know she did. Pancakes was probably the first thing out of her mouth. Do you think she neglected to tell them about perp-heal?

      • You know when John finally goes Donkey will be all over that desperately trying to remind everyone she came ?? this close to being his daughter-in-law.

        • Another “sliding-doors-moment” in the end? We haven’t had one of those in a while (that I know of).

  6. prima facie evidence that you’re a fool — when you blame your bad choices on a tv show

    also, illiteracy is a bad qualification for writing

    poor lily

    • Seriously. Your OMG perfectly married parents are all Princeton this and Standford that and you, a self-proclaimed “nerd” and “geek,” think the best path in life is to try to imitate a TV show. As the saying goes, great work.

      • *Stanford. And let’s not forget how you “quoted” Spinoza as the most intellectual 20-year-old ever.

    • So glad she’s the happy, healthy Julia she is today. Someone who took accountability for her poor life choices and for being such a thundercunt, and got the professional help necessary to turn her life around. JK- She blamed a decades old TV show. CWAA

      • And completely oblivious as to what that says about the critical thinking skills of someone allegedly both well read and highly educated at OMGGeorgetown nonetheless.

        • Come on! I mean, she was covered together with celebs such as Richard Branson, so it’s almost like she’s been CEO of a billion dollar business. And getting others to do the work/read for you means it’s legit to take credit for being a ’nerd’. Coming up with excuses to get out of doing work is hard work! Sooo well read (by association), why doesn’t everyone adore her for it?!! Presentation & perception are everything, right? As long as you can deliver a quote, no one will notice that you only read two pages. What, people can see through that? Oh, shit. It’s all SATC:s fault! And everyone must just be jealous.

          • Sadly, that must be her precise reasoning,if we can call it that. Another clue that her development arrested somewhere around early middle school at best.

    • Established herself = Wore a condom dress to a Gawker party so they’d write about her and make her micro-famous.

  7. Blame without accountability should be the title of her book that she’s never writing or getting published.

    • Ryan Allis is not a world leader and we KNOW Donk has only worked for him in the last two-three years. Christ, what horseshit. “Yes, Justin, of course I’ll put together the summit in Quebec. We’ll talk after my massage.”

      • I didn’t realize ‘mounting summits’ involved doing fluff presentations on woo topics in the least popular hour on the last day. Something she’s done, what, two or three times now in three years, at the most?

        Your synthetic rainbow pants are on fire, Donkey.

      • Excuse me, but Ali Shanti is a world leader in the fields of turkey feathers, rhinestones and not bathing.

        • Speaking of that jackass, she just posted this drivel about a photo shoot being part of her transformation into … you tell me.

          “Deep in the heart of one of the most uncertain moments in my transformation 7 years ago, this emerged.

          I did NOT want to do this photo shoot. I wanted to stay hidden.

          I was facing bankruptcy. Didn’t have money to buy clothes for the shoot. And, was not feeling my best, by any means.

          But, I had paid for the shoot months earlier and Christina Morassi was getting out of the business, so she said now or never. Oh, and, she reminded me that the shoot would foretell my becoming, if I could just surrender into it and show up.

          So I did.

          And a miracle happened at Lightning in a Bottle, just before the shoot. I had been booked to speak that year, and attended with my kids.

          I saw this dress. Made by the inimitable Sefirah Fierce. It was $3000. There was no way I could pay for it. But I knew I was meant to be photographed in it.

          And so I got up the nerve to ask her if I could take it home with me, wear it for the shoot and share the photos with her. And she said yes!

          Part of my personal learning at that time was that I could still receive even if I didn’t have money to exchange. This was a HUGE new awareness for me.

          (And, much later when I was making money again, I did end up buying the dress.)

          So for those of you who are “in it,” and just want to hide, I encourage you to bring yourself out as much as you can while you are still in it.

          There’s magic here for you. ❤️??”

          She wanted to stay hidden?! Skankatron, you’re a fucking exhibitionist. You’ve never had a hidden moment in your adult life.

          https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=204965086212840&set=a.139351286107554&type=3&theater

    • unfortunate verb noun order there, invoking quadrupeds and objects

      also, i heard someone named “bray” paged to customer service at the supermarket the other day, and nearly lol irl in public

      • Shush! I needed help finding Donkey-endorsed butt cleanse.

        Man did that shit fuck up her face.

      • YES. Epic. My eyes went wide with that sentence — “No…no it couldn’t be…an *actual donkey description*” in her own piece. Then I noticed the byline and wondered if young Doree had ever been a catlady. (God is good, but not that good)

    • Always so humble, our Donkey.

      Seriously, her delusions have crossed into pathetisad territory.

  8. $1 says the lakeside assisted living facility will be an ashram before it is ultimately forfeited for unpaid taxes

  9. Her own recounting of her timeline is every bit as fucked up as her face is.

    ;;

      • Right?! All this going on about being a fraud and one-dimensional while her face is twice as wide as it used to be having been chock-full of implants and fillers in the accompanying photo. Irony? Meta? Hypocritical? Or just sad?

        • Still making duckface. And I suspect the lack of makeup is her sad attempt to prove to the one who dumped her that yes, she can be authentic and natural. See? Want me back now? Can I dance for you again? Pretty please? I’ll even pretend to be OK with you screwing around! The McMansion we shared!

          • i thought cryface more than anything else.

            when my brother worked in forensics, he was close friends with the police photographer who had a really great read on people. we took some photos for my dad to take with him when he passed, and he said to me “you don’t like having your photo taken, do you?”.

            truth.

            it would be interesting to get his take on this shot.

  10. I must say, if I first heard of Donkey Allison Baugher from this article, I’d be QUITE surprised by all the alleged “infamy” and the “they said I was one of the most hated people on the internet” bit. Hated for what, for being a sweet innocent formerly nerdy (haha!) girl trying to have Carrie Bradshaw’s dating life and column in NYC? That doesn’t quite compute, does it?

    • The sweet, innocent, formerly nerdy girl whose boyfriend’s parents had to put out a restraining order on her after she sent their son sex toys and was caught banging him in his bedroom.

      This bitch was Samantha Jones long before she got to Georgetown.

      • ….without the style, good heart, friends and professional skills.

          • Also, Little Brother Britt is an actual nerd, so of course she wants to appropriate nerdiness as if she did it first. Thuch an intellecthual, that one!

          • Also, her parents and Britt are far more accomplished than she is, and this is her ham-handed way to say “LOOK AT ME! I’M SMART, TOO!”

            Come to think of it, the former JIML had a similar frustration, in that her parents and younger sister are all fairly famous and at least somewhat accomplished, and she’s not

          • Also, she mistakenly believes the “nerd” label would explain why she wasn’t popular.

        • Like Milhouse said to Bart once, “I am not a nerd, Bart. Nerds are smart”.

          • This. Pretty easy. Your nerd storyline doesn’t compute with your storyline about the adorable fuckup who ruined that debate after which your OMG debate partner “threatened” not to speak to you for 180 years, nor does it work with (again, your own) storyline about the wild and sexy donkey whose boyfriend’s parents had to forbid her entry to their house. As usual.

        • Deep down inside she remembers when she had a giant nose, receding chin, thick glasses, and jacked-up teeth, and that people bullied her because she’s sucked at debate team and was annoying as hell. Arrested development. She’s spent all these years trying to prove she’s not that person, except she’s neglected to fix the “annoying as hell” part.

          • She thought that fixing her face would fix the annoying as hell part. She never once considered that she has always been disliked for her gross personality, or that a totally unremarkable looking Base Model Julia could have been successful if she had a genuine bone in her body.

    • Seriously, how does that “hated” thing make sense in the narrative? Lots of people, myself included, weren’t big fans of SATC and some even hated it, but I never heard anyone suggest (on the show or IRL) that Carrie was one of the most hated people anywhere. Could it be that there WAS something other about Donkey than just wanting to dress well (bwaha) and have lots of dates?

      The answer is, of course, that she was brave enough to write about her bulimia. Everyone hates the brave people who do that.

      • the bulimia that she used to have but now magically doesn’t anymore because magic I guess.

    • And yet..my Twitter timeline suddenly filled with newly minted Julia-haters this afternoon, people who had never heard of her before the Post article yesterday. I followed one thread that would.not.end because people just kept remarking on her hateablility. They were not buying any of it.

  11. Note the omission of Burning Man, plant medicine, and Shakti. Well played, Donk. Theresa May probably wouldn’t want to be associated with the likes of perp-heal, Roxanne DePalma, and Ali Shanti.

  12. So, in 10 years she’s going to write another article about how “Eat, Bray, Love”
    Ruined her life??
    Ok

    • This. Exactly this. SATC ruined her 20s and 30s, so now she’ll try to Eat.Bray.Love through her 40s. Can’t wait to see what’s next – Calendar Girls? Best Exotic Marigold Hotel? Driving Miss Daisy?
      So much for “authentic” self…

  13. Notice how she claims she appeared on the cover of Wired prior to 2008. No one bothered to fact-check the most easily debunked claims of this horseshit.

  14. And in case you don’t know nypost sryle, this headline and placement is to scoff at the subject, not present a candid story someone actually cares about. Photo in it by Petra Ford a Chicago fashion photog with 1 very good yelp review.

      • I wonder if her parents take Donk to Wilmette social functions while she’s in clad in goddess garb and jedi jewelry.

        • Remember when they took her to the pumpkin sale at their church, and she was dressed in the cartoon onesie?

          I’m hard-pressed to understand how they’re willing to be seen with her anywhere at anytime but hey, only a mothers love, amirite?

          • It’s easier for her parents to explain her failure to launch to the powerful moms if she’s dressed like she’s out on a day pass from the mental hospital.

  15. A dog chooses the schlub that a donkey should date? I’d kill to watch her make an idiot out of herself (more than usual) on that “Animal Planet” pilot.

    • I haven’t seen a single positive comment, they go from outright anger to calling the piece boring.

      My favorite was “I model my life around Curb Your Enthusiasm”.

      • My new favorite:

        That’s just like me when I saw Star Wars and decided to fly the galaxies like Princes Leia, … and then, it just didn’t work out. I couldn’t get a spaceship, my wound side braids would not stay put, and my Wookie wouldn’t mind. On top of it, It didn’t work out with that Luke guy. Not. ???. Seriously, tv and movies are ….tv and movies.

    • “Wonder if she watches GAME OF THRONES?…how would that lifestyle turn out, lol?”

      This is Donkey failing again to understand the recent backlash of SATC (no one wants a third movie) and somehow thinks this applies to her delusions over the show. She is beyond help.

  16. Holy pressed-up-against-the-glass, Batman!
    Did Donkey get a fourth nose job?
    Just noticed how flat the end of it looks now.

    Zoom in on that atrocity, if you dare…

  17. The commenters are speaking (from private FB pages):

    “This was literally the stupidest thing I’ve read all year—in so many ways, on so many levels. Who is this nutjob? I’ve never even heard of her.”

    Well done, Julesie. Well done.

    • My favorite was the commenter who’s now worried because “Game of Thrones” is her favorite show. Ha! I also liked:

      I can verify personally that much of what’s in this article is heavily massaged to make Julia look like something she’s not. My experience with her is that she’s aggressive and self-aggrandizing, does not recognize or respect normal social boundaries (and especially relationship boundaries-particularly with exes). She rewrites her past (if she can’t erase it) to try to get people to like her. Google her—there’s Is information on multiple sites that outline at least a decade of consistently heinous behavior that demonstrates a lack of personal responsibility, self-awareness, and empathy. That she touts herself as evolved and wise is laughable to many people who have had personal experience with her.

      • She continues to outdo herself. SATC happened more than 20 years ago. How is she still spinning this as her story?

  18. Also from a FB page:

    “A change activist? She mounts summits for world leaders? I thought Georgetown had admission standards?”

    Indeed.

  19. Omg. She’s blaming a TELEVISION SHOW for influencing her life choices??? She’s regretting ever having seen it, saying maybe if she hadn’t seen it she’d be married with 2 kids??? This. Is. Too. Much. #delusional

  20. Sad.com

    And I thought her sex life was in full swing as a high school senior. Wasn’t she giving Dan’s mother heart attacks on a regular basis by screwing Dan in their home while Mom n Dad were there?

    I’m sure Candace Bushnell is all torn up about poor Julia’s life going down the toilet bc of SATC. Not!

  21. I just don’t understand why this Woman doesn’t get it after all these years & all the help from her bought & paid for friends to her fans here on this blog?! True transformation would be her taking her privilege & getting a real job doing for others. Pay whatever you got forward. Get passionate about helping others in whatever way you can. She has been on a navel gazing tour for over 10 years! 10 MF years & still exactly where you started from! WTF? This isnt transformation. This is a costume change! AND grow the F up & stop LABELING everything & everyone! How about you get in a relationship & think to yourself – this is my true love, & just tell the world I am in a relationship with Bruce. He is awesome & I am so happy. Not this is “Mr. Good Enough, Strong Enough, White Enough”.

    • Did you read the comments on the Post’s FB page? Folks were either dismissive or contemptuous. No one would buy this BOOK and Donkey’s name in publishing circles is mud.

      • Not one sympathetic sap in the bunch. Honestly, what does her Mother think? She 38. I was a quasi-julia in that I was attracted to the glam of Manhattan & moved there shortly after graduating in 1999. My rent share was $750 on E. 52nd street & my salary was 25k as a oh so glamourus Paralegal. The worst JOB I can imagine & yet I am still doing it 20 years later. I had no help from anyone & it was truly scary but thrilling. I dated a lot of different & often fuxked up people. Wealthy for sure but souless. It didnt take me a lifetime to get it right. I am so happy I got over myself quickly. I ended up falling for a Puerto Rican Rockland (that is kind of upstate NY) Hillbilly who loves Family, Boating & Jeeps & left my NYC dream & Ive never been happier. I just spent 10 minutes playing open & shut the door with my 15 month old & I am pretty sure I contributed more to the world in that time than she has in the last 10 years.

          • I’ve been told I should write a book. Midwest middle class girl, Dad committed suicide on his 40th Birthday, prompting Girl to run as far away from MN as possible to NY, struggle in the City, lived blocks away from World Trade on 9/11, was stabbed a year later in the East Village, survived by a number of miracles, married a socio path, survived an abusive sociopath, fell in love with the guy who never would have crossed my radar” suffered through infertility & now am a very happy suburban mom of a 15 month old & happy wife of a puerto rican ny hillbilly! LOL! Where my ghost writers at???

        • But how can Michael Ellsberg help her write the proposal if he’s too busy overseeing the men signing up for The Consent Pledge?

          • Any chance he is the guy? He had. An anon in a tub and she is playing coy. That would be hilarious, almost as good aS mental dental

          • Ew! Cannot unsee. Those two copulating would be a crime against humanity!

      • Thinking she’s going for the “Broken Carrie Bradshaw is now the enlightened, healthy and stable Julia of today” angle for a book which really is “Eat, Bray, Love 2.0″…and of course, again, not original.

        I think she has padded her time in Bali, too. 8 months our time equals 3 months Donkey time.

        Her life reminds me of that sequence in “Groundhog Day” when Bill Murray tries to force the happiness, fun and sex with Andie MacDowell’s character, instead of…ahem…letting it unfold. (Granny Money Bags was on to something.)

        And whoever stated it about Julia “having a boyfriend at the end of the journey” is soooo right. Always! Always! She thinks the big reward of her “healthy and stable Julia of today, Part X journey” is a boyfriend. How did it fare for you the previous 9 times, Julia? Here’s a hint: it’s finding your purpose in this world and contributing to it.

        And what a “meh” response to the only guy willing to date her. She should be so lucky with her expired raft ass!!! I’m sure he’s probably twice-divorced and not up for a chase anymore; simply looking for a place to stick it, if you know what I mean.

        • Please let this whole article be because Rain has found true love and monogamy and we are about to see a NYTimes announcement with some mention of his unstable ex. Please. Because that would be amazing.

          • She’s definitely spinning to get out ahead of something-ILYR finding true love and monogamy sounds about right.
            Sure she’ll try and pitch another book but from the comments, no one would touch her.
            Crawl back under your rock donkey and try again never. Move on from *fame* and marry that mediocre man you write about so dispassionately.

          • Pfft. There is no new man. She is lying or we would have heard about it already. She’d never be able to keep that a secret.

          • Wasn’t she still in Bali two months ago, and imposing herself at Myka’s boyfriend’s place in CO since she’s been back? If this guy does exist, she’s probably been out with him all of twice.

            Do you think a “very reasonable choice” is a step up or down from “base model”?

  22. I love how the duplicitous, conniving, lying Donkey conveniently included a link to her “top 25 moments” on Gawker.

    Oh, and after 10 years she is still sore that they flew her back on JetBlue.

    Of course, this shows that the life of “integrity” she claims to be living now is a complete fraud, just like her previous life was and her next incarnation is going to be.

    • “The guy tried to rape me and I had to lock myself in the bathroom. But the worst part is, he flew me home on Jet Blue!”

      Jesus, what an airhead. I can’t figure out if she thinks trivializing sexual assault is funny/cute or if she’s just making the whole incident up. I guess we’ll learn in a few days when she posts on FB “I can’t believe how badly the Post treated me! Here’s what they left out/took out of context/made up to make me look bad! Oh, woe is me, I’m going to need another vacation to escape the stress!”

      • “I can’t figure out if she thinks trivializing sexual assault is funny/cute or if she’s just making the whole incident up.”

        My money’s on both.

        • I’m sure none of us need reminding about “I was inside.” She and ‘trivializing sexual assault’ go way, way back.

      • IIRC, didn’t she get herself in a couple other situations like This? Didn’t some guy fly her to South Africa? And another to St. Bart’s? And she was all huffy that they had expectations too?

  23. I wonder if MMBH and Meghannaise know that their likenesses grace the pages of the New York Post.

    • They might have requested that their names *not* be noted under the photo. I noticed they weren’t named but the MissAdvised duo were.

  24. If you search ‘Julia Allison’ on Twitter you find a delightful assortment of commentary about this piece from media types.

  25. “I dated a woman for a while, a beautiful entrepreneur who was also jilted by New York — that’s definitely not something you saw Carrie do.”

    BECAUSE CARRIE BRADSHAW WAS STRAIGHT. This line annoys me so fucking much because it implies sexuality is a choice and that Julia dated a woman just to be different from her NYC man-chasing persona. Of course Carrie didn’t date women. She wasn’t attracted to women.

    • Julia Allison is straight, too, which is why this whopper lie annoys me to no end.

    • She’s def a younger edgier* CB, for sure.

      *I seem to recall her claiming to be a “younger, edgier” Gretchen Rubin in her book proposal.

    • Super minor point but there was a story line about Samantha dating and falling in love with a woman. And (I’m embarrassed to recall) the other ladies barely reacted. Carrie joked that she was shocked Samantha was…in a relationship.

      • Yep, and they depicted lesbian oral sex and squirting.

        In a different story line, Charlotte is hanging out with the “power lesbians” who shop at her gallery, which she finds so empowering and pro-woman… then one of them says to her, condescendingly, “That’s nice, but if you don’t eat pussy, you’re not a real dyke.”

        Then there was the time Carrie kissed a woman at a 20-something spin-the-bottle party (which she attended with her younger, bisexual boyfriend), and realized she didn’t want to do something just to be trendy or shocking.

        TR;DR: The show dealt with bisexuality/bikissuality/straight women experimenting. Donk, you didn’t out-edgy SATC when you kissed your female friend in a fauxto and called it bisexuality.

    • wow her pr team is in overdrive, it’s embarrassing.

      • The Daily Fail picked it up from The NY Post. There’s no PR or people.

        • Thank you, I was wondering how this piece was making its rounds. Buzzfeed and Jezebel next?

          • Indeed. I’ll bet we see a few more sites posting about Delusional Donkey tomorrow.

          • oh! that was always one of my favorites. Good times. Is it too much to hope for the return of that grimy, vintage canvas and leather-trimmed satchel?

          • “Seen shopping”

            Seen repeatedly clomping toward Meghannaise ‘til finally getting the fauxto Donk settled on for emailing to the publication is more likely.

            SoHo probably did wish for a storm to wash the stench away.

  26. I am so glad I came back here and touched base with y’all right before all of twitter turned into one big RBD.

  27. The Daily Mail is full of delicious shade photos. Seeing the 1970s Mrs. Roper housecoat and the pic of her with Derpin almost killed me.

    • What is her end game? Was she hoping for people believing she’s learned something? She comes across even more pathetic than usual and that’s really hard to do in her case.

      • I find the Daily Mail development very worrying.

        Is she trying to stage a comeback?

        • If she is, she’s just alienated a whole bunch of folks in her tribe and she’s getting ripped to shreds everywhere.

          • She is burning the ashes of the bridges she burnt while she was living in that awful awful City of New York.

          • She’s also burning woo bridges as they aren’t mentioned at all and her acceptance of polyamory, a woo trait, is depicted in a negative light, as something she was willing to endure because of the horror of SATC. Huh?

        • Not to worry. They picked up the article from the Post. They do this with a lot of vacuous socialite materials and they love to take the piss out when they can.

          She is getting hammered everywhere on social media. She’ll have cryface for weeks.

          • I’m guessing a ‘I never consented to this article,’ or they ‘twisted my words’ piece will soon follow.

  28. In the Daily Mail piece weed entrepreneur extraordinaire Devin Stetler is described as “a guest” (hint: he did NOT want his name used) and they show him side by side with Baryshnikov.

    The Baryshnikov of Modesto.

    Of course!

  29. From the Daily Fail:

    “Julia Allison, who hails from Illinois, modeled her life in New York after the fictional character Carrie Bradshaw, played by Sarah Jessica Parker, on the enormously popular show. She even became a dating columnist, just like Carrie.

    Attending chic parties, attaining the best in fashion and finding her own Mr. Big were the core values Allison had. She now says blindly following the show as a road map to life left her bitter and broken.”

    • But now everything is fine because she has a mysterious new boyfriend!! If only she’d met him before all the bitterness …

      • Who, if he exists, and has any self-respect will quickly and quietly exit stage left.

        • He probably left already. Isn’t that usually her M.O., to write some kind of territorial pissing post as if that’s going to resurrect her most recently failed relationship?

  30. Also interesting to note that the whole Julia and Redacted website debacle of 2007-2008 wasn’t part of the Daily Fail piece.

  31. What was she thinking with this piece?? Surely every crowd she’s ever run with through her persona changes will be able to easily poke holes in all of her stories. I can’t imagine Myka is happy Julia said they dated since she claims they only kissed.

    • My thought is that Donkey is miffed that Myka is living with a serious new love and is no longer available for the role of globetrotting wingburro. This was her attempt at “we overlapped”with Rob.

  32. Best Twitter comment describes her as “The Don Quixote of basic ladies.” Hahaha.

    • More like she has been stalking a dude for a few weeks.

      I mean, 2 Donkey months (more like 3 weeks in real life) is WAAAAY too soon to announce to the world yet another greatest love the world has ever known.

      • No, no, no. Didn’t you see? He’s simply a reasonable choice. Nothing more, nothing less.

    • she does that a lot. it’s a common attention-seeking thing, and doesn’t mean anything.

      if she were engaged, she’d be screeching louder than a prom queen hanging out of the roof of a stretch limo.

  33. Rising senior in summer of 1998, enrolled in Georgetown in 1999…so her transfer was accepted in 1999, or is this a big lie and not a bending of the truth

    I’m kinda surprised it didn’t end with “my father still wonders when I’ll get health care” since she loved that joke so much

    • Also I’m also really surprised she didn’t mention pancakes even vaguely. ‘dated military man’ or ‘involved with a politician’s heir’

      • “Military man” doesn’t imply the kind of money she chased after. But between pancakes and Harold Ford (was that the dude’s name?), you would think there’d be some reference to dating in political circles. Though maybe we’re supposed to infer that from the mention of Kissinger…?

        • yeah i figured there would be a reference dropped with the hope people would google the details

    • Wait, what? I understand the mail is trash, but this article has to be a total joke. The woman is not unattractive, but she’s not so beautiful that people would fall all over themselves around her. What am I missing here? Cause I think she’s pretty average.

    • Also, I’m missing the connection to Julia? I didn’t finish reading the article, so was it at the end?

  34. OMG, a Slate podcast on Donk’s failed reboot? The lulz to come … can’t wait!

  35. That photo of her is very much screaming “it’s a Chico’s kind of day.” I’m right around Julia’s age, and that’s like…pajamas. Shit you wear around the house to be comfy. But to wear it out in public, and to be photographed in it? Pretty sure Barbra Streisand wore a similar outfit in Meet the Fockers, where she played the freaking retired mother of a man ostensibly in his 30s.

    Also, Julia, you were NEVER Carrie 2.0. Just look at the side-by-side photos. Your shoe game was, is, and always will be pathetisad, where Carrie’s was amazing. But I guess it’s much harder to return shoes after they’ve been worn!

    • That white cutwork lace looks like my graduation dress I got from Pier 1. I think she’s going for Easy Breezy Enlightened. She just looks haggard and 2 minutes post-hysteria.

  36. Also, also: I can’t find the comment now, whether it was on here or on Twitter, but someone said how Carrie was not an aspirational character, that we were supposed to NOT do what Carrie does, as even in the opening credits Carrie gets humiliated by her “persona” on a city bus. Carrie is really an anti-hero. SS; SF; so not as eloquent as the original comment, but I really enjoyed the series the first time around, and this analysis of it is really interesting to me. I didn’t see it then, but I think now I’m going to watch the series again, with this viewpoint in the back of my mind.

  37. How can this now somehow lead to Julia switching personalities yet again and attempting to date Donald Trump Jr.? I’m desperate for this to happen. And he’s SINGLE now! Come on, catladies, let’s wish really hard like The Secret tells us to.

    • I hate to break it to you, but Don Jr. is already porking another gold-digging brunette with a busted face and bad wig. He’s currently with the ex-hookup of Mrs. Scaramucci’s husband, Kimberly Guilfoyle

  38. I thought her parents didn’t own/were too intellectual to watch television. Yet it seems they had one, AND an HBO subscription, since she got hooked on SATC in high school. Huh.

    • If Snookums wanted a TV in her room, I’m sure Snookums got a TV in her room. Complete with HBO.

  39. What did she do? Oh, god. Was this supposed to be a good thing? Or has she just decided to go scorched earth on what’s left of her life for a few more seconds of internet attention? I honestly can’t tell. I think it’s the first one.

    Welcome back, Julia.

  40. Finally, proof! Lying is like riding a bicycle.
    And now to read all the comment goodness.

  41. Fuck me, she is still whining on about this cunty TV show? How could anyone watch five minutes of it and think: “Hey… a blueprint for my life!” It’s like watching “American Psycho” and deciding the point is that you simply must have a divine overnight bag by John Paul Gautier.

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