Living In A Soon-To-Be Fascist Nation? Let Jena & Sacha Whisk You Away To Non-Stop Pleasure!

No one does erotic innocence like these two walking STDs. Why, after getting down & dirty with J&S, you’ll be experiencing such paroxysms of bliss that martial law will seem like a picnic!

#pleasurableignorance
#headsuptheirassesarehappening
#justgimmeagreencard

Holy dual receding hairlines!

16 COMMENTS

  1. Typically, when I see a couple getting all smug about “we’re so happy and we can teach you how to be too!” I figure they’ve got about six months left.

    • Yep. Every couple I’ve known who felt compelled to shout their bliss from the treetops again and again and again ended up in divorce court less than a year later.

    • So true or one is cheating on the other already. But I guess in their relationship that’s an upside?? The only thing people are wondering is how adults can act like this.

  2. They haven’t even been married a “moon time” and they’re selling this stuff? And they drag about with them the debris of at least three significant unsuccessful relationships/marriages like so much playa dust. What do they know?

    • They don’t know a fucking thing about marriage, and he can’t even afford Christmas presents for the children back in Switzerland he’s apparently abandoned, but this is SO typical of the instant expert woos. Exhibit A: Ali and boy burger Fozzie giving a talk on parenting at Camp Septic. They broke up soon after.

        • Yes, Fozzie was 23 years old and NOT a parent, just some skank’s Burger King boy toy, and he and the old raunch discussed parenting skills. This was the same Burning Man during which she got angry at Fozzie for being reluctant to attend an orgy, so she blew him off and went by herself. #pleasurableselfishness

  3. How do they look so happy? Because their relationship isn’t even a year old AND they’re allowed to have sex with other people.

    Why do they look like they’re having so much fun? Because they don’t have jobs, so they party all day and live off their rich friends.

    Is there ANYTHING that these woos won’t monetize?

    • First, yes, of course, all of this. But second, even if these dolts were a legit couple with more than over 30+ years of happy relationship under their (NACHOS) belt, why would an adult think “How do they look so happy? What are their secrets?” People who live together and love each other tend to be happy together. It’s kind of been done for a while now, simultaneously equal parts all over the world. Even if you haven’t experienced it, and pro tip, most people have, you have seen it. It’s not unusual. I don’t see what the “secrets” are supposed to be. And that’s leaving the whole “my money, let me give it to you so I can be taught your secrets” aspect out of it.

      • Aw fuck, only now I got to read the whole “copy” (????). “A multi-sensory, multi-modality experience in your life.” I take it all back: clearly these people are True Experts with Secrets.

  4. top pic: dude is wearing makeup, possibly even something on his eyelashes?

    comparison to bottom pic makes obvious

  5. Holy moly these two and their lack of a hair line is comical and psychological sad at the same time. Hey their is sucker born every thirty seconds and if they can find a sucker to play with them yuck! Also be prepared to hgey vaccines and anitbotics. Just saying

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