Updated: A Transformative Night On The Town With Donkey & Kitty

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pippi4

Could someone please explain our burro’s getup to me? I’m completely confused. Pippi Longstocking via … ?

Update: After the soporific song stylings of Ayla Enya, Donkey & Mrs. Kittay needed a pick me up and took in a spectacular drag show at Finocchio’s!

#pleasurablelipsynching
#somethingdivineiswakingup

Bottom Picture! No-holes-barred groupies Judy & Kitty never sleep. Here they are backstage at A Flock of Seagulls reunion concert, both eager to give a lucky stiff their best Pamela Des Barres:

80 COMMENTS

  1. Is there an age cutoff for pigtail braids? I’m recently expired, and every time I put them in (usually after a sweaty workout) I feel like they’re crazy juvenile, similar to Julie up there. Single braids seem more ok.

    • I thought she decided that the best way to support the Red Rock Sioux is by people noticing her Indian braids.

    • My hair is just below chin-length and if I forget to put it in two French braids at night, I wake up either with weird waves that look like yak horns, or with it all gone flat in the style of Bowie when he wore that awful soul patch.
      In the morning I undo the braids and the hair brushes out into really nice waves, kind of like Rachel McAdams’s hair in “True Detective.” I’m very lazy and have no time for heat styling or product other than light oils, so it works great for my specific purposes.

      Once or twice I have worn the twin braids outside, mostly to attend goth shows immediately after showering; I am growing out a blonde dye job and think the style makes me look like Debbie Harry crossed with Wednesday Addams.
      But now it seems Kylie Jenner has been wearing long pigtail French braids, so the look has probably reached the end of its shelf life for everyone who isn’t chasing trends.

      Which is probably how Judy caught the bug. Much independent-thinking, unplugged, free-spirited hippie.

    • I think you can do them at any age if you have the cheekbones- which I decidedly DO NOT. Patti Smith rocks them STILL. I just hosted an Air B & B lady in her 60’s and she had long grey hair that looked amazing in her Heidi braids. On the other hand she also looked great without any makeup at all, does yoga daily and lives in Alaska. So yeah, maybe it works in the context of a lifestyle.

      • You noticed too?

        I personally do not wear makeup (apart from that Garnier BB cream, because tinted sunscreen!) and am very “at one” with women’s natural faces, but something about the woo women just looks … off.
        Not even getting into Scamti territory. There is just something not right and I can’t quite put a finger on it.

      • I think she has put on a few pounds, not many. But her face is fuller than in her Facebook pix. That plus no makeup. She is naturally very pretty. I don’t know why she wastes time hanging with Donkey.

        • Keep your friends close and the people who want to steal your husband closer?

          I think she’s pretty, too, but her husband reminds me of on Ally McBeal when Billy bleached his hair and started acting all weird.

          • He is another one of those perpetually adolescent boy/men. Immature and so tedious to be in a relationship with, let alone be married to.

  2. First picture, the other women are posed age appropriately and then there’s donkey desperately posing and desperately in need of a Coobiectomy.

  3. I checked out Nereo’s The Code of the Flowers at the iTunes Store and every track is like warmed over Enya. Christ, no one wants to listen to retro New Age.

  4. No bra, Lularoe tights, pink wedge sneakers and braids. Much style.
    I’m guessing she is going for “vaguely ethic woo cheerleader” or something.

    • Handbag! Are you losing your powers of obserbraytion? There’s the top of a pink Velcro wedge sneaker that can be seen on her left back leg. (With softness.)

      Because what else would you wear with multicolored leggings as pants? In public.

      • Those leggings are immensely unflattering. If your ass looks enormous in a three-quarter frontal view, you know you got ahold of some bad pants.

        • I think her ass is fine but her poor boobs look like icing bags fitted out with No 3 piping tips.

          • well on THAT note, since we’re discussing this, I think her crohn’s or celiac or whatever disease points to some type of incontinence and I’m on board with the literal diaper theory. Not that I spend much precious time thinking about this when I could be doodling Benedict Cumberbatch’s name entwined with mine in my Trapper Keeper.

          • Based on my many viewings of the actual “bottom picture”, that is the actual shape of her derriere, no diaper. The “bottom picture’ will never stop being funny and, in this case, informative.

          • I love this description.

            On the menu tonight: pepperoni nips embellished with piping tips.

            A huge part of me resists the mocking of specific body parts, but Donkey’s unrelenting postings of her ill-considered “look-at-me-I’m-so-hot” posings override my better self.

          • Yes. She has a perfectly presentable figure, but she dresses it exactly wrong almost always. I embraced the patterned leggings trend WHEN IT WAS STILL HAPPENING, WHICH NOTE TO JUDY IT IS NOT because I am top-heavy, so the busy bottoms paired with a simple monochrome top balanced me out visually.

          • I still wear patterned leggings because IDGAF what people think at my age, but my legs and butt are half the size of hers and I know how to accessorize. There are so many great flowing bohemian looks popular right now that would flatter her so much more, yet she clings to what works the worst for her body and reinforces her refusal to grow up and act like a woman instead of a lurching toddler. It is not cute anymore. Kinderwhore was not cute. Wearing onesies to the pumpkin patch was not cute. Wearing sports bras meant as underwear as outerwear was not cute. Wearing what is essentially a pajamas set to a concert is not cute.

    • Be very afraid, though it looks as though this time the blowout prior to filing will be with the kid. They just saw Britney Spears in concert.

      • Elizabeth Purvis In other news, I really, REALLY hope my kid wants to hang out with me when she’s that age. 🙂

        Ali Shanti That’s the best part! I’m so grateful that I handled things in such a way that she does. It looked uncertain for a bit there. Phew.

        Good going there, Ali. Always better to be your child’s BFF instead of being her parent. Please pat yourself on the back again.

        • yeah, also, you don’t get parenting points for taking your daughter to a concert she couldn’t afford or travel to on her own. See if she wants to spend holidays with you when she is older. You can’t tally the scores when they’re still dependent on you.

        • Heh. Howz ’bout moty Ali Get Your Dildo having ‘so many mixed feelings about the show myself and the messages it sends’ (because: [Kid] ‘had some eyes wide, holy cow, is this really what we want to teach to our kids type of moments’)?

          Hypocrisy much, skanky skank who skanks w/ kids in tow?

        • Uncertain for a bit? She’s the poster child for instability.

  5. Printed leggings had a moment 4-5 years ago and are pretty passe at this point. I spend a lot of time at a fancy private college in so-called “flyover country” i.e., where you would expect this trend to still be in swing, and none of the tiny n cute undergrads wear them.

    In fact, the only women I see rocking printed leggings are southern soccer mommas. Note: not the tiny n cute young hipster mothers. I’m talking the suburban basic bitch, probably hawking MLM products on Facebook, probably voted for Trump, still pinning turquoise chevron items on Pinterest mothers.

    The only leggings I tend to see these days are basic black, or have interesting cutouts or colorblocking or paneling.

    • I was at Meijer last night picking up our Thanksgiving duck and there was a huge rack of printed leggings, some of them very similar to those our Judy was wearing. Meijer is THE WORST place to get clothes, everything is ugly there (and i’m a person who can rock a Faded Glory hoodie in the most impossibly chic way although where I really shine is Goodwill).

      So although I’m not seeing printed leggings as OVER, I think they SHOULD be.

  6. Ugh this outfit annoys me so much for some reason. The other women are in dresses/skirts and she looks like she rolled out of a slumber party WITH NO BRA. Why would you post so many photos of yourself when you look so godawful/underdressed?

    • Overdressed or underdressed, she’s never had any fashion sense. That’s never going to change.

    • The only explanation is that she believes that look is the hotness, so it’s just today’s “what is wrong with her” mystery. The standard guess is the girlfriend of some guy she wants dresses like that, and is probably 10 years younger.

    • I hope her awful parents have that dog. At least they won’t try to make it vegan and they’ll send her to the groomer once in a while. She’s the closest they’ll ever get to a grandchild offa Jaba.

  7. Did Robin and Peter Baugher meet DJ Geriatric? Was he shirtless? Were there fauxtoshoots with Dadsers behind the camera? Is Peter Baugher feeling #soblessed?

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