Cool Mom Ali Shanti Went On A Hot Date With The Neighborhood Kids

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I suspect the trip to the karaoke bar was built around Kaia’s rigorous home school curriculum, in which DJing and modeling, subjects not authorized by the Colorado Board of Education, take pride of place.

The old raunch has also been posting non-stop about intimacy. Has Doug Henning dumped her? Have her ex-husband and her daughter’s live-in boyfriend stopped complimenting SK3B on her turkey feathers coiffure? It’s worrisome!

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https://www.facebook.com/bentinhomassaro/photos/a.205428999523099.54103.191512050914794/1125917017474288/?type=3&theater

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https://medium.com/@alexisneely/spacious-intimacy-5443c364601a#.paf44op58

Bottom GIF! After you’ve mastered work-een your yoni, Dead Russian Hooker #2 would like you to incorporate these sensual dance-een moves into your self-love routine:

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55 COMMENTS

  1. “do not try and bend the spoon – that’s impossible. instead, only try to realize the truth: there is no spoon”

  2. She looks like she would reek of foot stank, sweat and old yogurt. No you can’t stir your yoni with us. #meangrifts

  3. Bottom picture: untreated mental illness.
    Top picture: not yet arrested, indicted & convicted felon

    • Added to post. My goodness I loathe her lazy one-sentence paragraph prose, even more so than I do Julia’s drivel.

  4. Relationships are hard but they’re not THAT hard.

    Calm the fuck down, stop fucking every man who comes to you without a note pinned to his shirt requesting on behalf of his partner that he not be fucked, and pick a general direction for your life that some other human being could feasibly share with you. Jesus.

    • They are that hard when you want to be polyamorous. When you have to be true to yourself, even though most of the dating population thinks your “truth” is colossally fucked up, it tends to throw a wrench into things.

      At least she’s honest. I have a feeling she’ll be searching until she’s in the old folks home. But then it’s all free love all the time, or so I’ve heard.

      • Please, she’d be blithering on and on and on about relationship even if she weren’t banging everything with a heartbeat. “Poly” has little to do with Shanti’s exhibitionism and her need to fart her every thought online in endless essays consisting of one-sentence paragraphs. My version of Sartre’s NO EXIT would find me locked in a basement with Shantitown and she won’t stop reading aloud all of the narcissistic drivel she’s posted all over the internet.

        hino

          • And the sunlight blocked by the most expensive draperies in the Sears, Roebuck catalog.

        • No doubt! But that’s what’s so frustrating about her. She picks the type of relationship that is most difficult to find and sustain, and then whines constantly when she fails to find and sustain it.

          Ali, here’s some free advice from a fellow forty something divorcee with kids who has BTDT. You can even call this “goddess advice,” if it helps you swallow it. Whatever you think you need in a relationship, ask yourself whether you would rather be single/unpartnered for the rest of your life than give that thing up. If the answer is yes (and I applaud you if it is), then be the strong woman you claim to be and STFU with your whining and complaining.

          But if the answer is no, how about not being such a narcissist and admitting that you actually have no idea what is going to make you happy in a relationship? I mean, you haven’t found success yet, so why do you think you already have the right vision and just need to find the man who fits that vision? Just let go of all this construct and experience people as people. Stop trying to shoehorn everyone into your warped version of what an actualized relationship would look like. You might be surprised that relationships really don’t have to be so complicated.

    • “every man who comes to you without a note pinned to his shirt requesting on behalf of his partner that he not be fucked”

      laughing so hard i think i pulled a muscle!

  5. We had brunch today with some friends and their 17-year-old daughter, and the degree of scorn she exhibited for her parents (and by extension, us) was refreshing. It makes me sad that SK3000 denies her daughter the opportunity for individuation!

    Also, My Little Yoni looks so much like Sissy Spacek as Carrie that I expect all her videos to end in a rain of blood and psychic fire.

      • Nameless Name Dropping! The father of a good friend dated Madigan when they were attending Marquette. He has nothing but wonderful things to say about her, including that she’s a great singer.

        • She seems like she’d be down-to-earth. I think the last thing I saw her in was “Carnivale.” She was so good!

  6. Has anyone else actually clicked through and read the FB post that Ali describes as a “beautiful vision my heart knows is possible”?

    It is written by a douchebag. He references his girlfriend. Here’s the key extract:

    “A big shout out to Allison for being the most willing, trusting and surrendered (therefore brave and unafraid to let go of separation and ego) girlfriend I have ever had thus far. I hold her to a very high standard and it’s not always easy because I am a cosmic microscope, but she is a great example of how true joy and love in partnership can be discovered when trust, willingness and surrender are more powerful than the old feministic ideologies of ‘holding onto your opinion’ and ‘making sure you’re not getting hurt’ and ‘feeling inferior to the other person if you give in to them or their guidance’ and ‘standing up for yourself.'”

    Yes, folks, let Betinho explain to you how “surrender” is “more powerful than the old feministic ideologies” like “standing up for yourself.”

    WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE WOOS????

    • Bet he’s one of those guys who tells everyone he’s in an ‘open relationship’ but his current partner is still adjusting to the concept because she’s still evolving.

      So it’s totally cool that he sleeps with other people, just don’t tell her until she’s caught up to his level of consciousness.

      Our little cosmic secret, mmm kay?

      • JFA I know I’ve read a scathing exposé about Betinho before, and think it was either on Salty Droid or he linked to it, but can’t find it right now. Tl;dr he is yet another New Agey sexual predator.

        • There is something very molesty about that picture of him with that girl that looks like his daughter.

        • We’ve discussed this Bentinho asshole before, back when Mental Dental flipped his wig and got carted off. Dr Ryan Inswain and OMG Bree Why Are You Destroying Our Family (esp. Bree) were into Bentinho. The kid from Menudo was involved somehow.

          Bentinho is one of the non-duality charlatans, written off as a poseur by the genuine, old school folks.

    • Erika Grace Rockwell How do you support HER freedom? What high demands of HERS do you adhere?

      Jeremy Furtner Why do you emphasize the HER so strongly? It sounds combative and accusatory.

      Erika Grace Rockwell He doesn’t mention her much in this post except what she does for him. I’m curious how he supports her in return and adheres to her strong demands.

      Crickets from Betinho.

      • What the fuck is wrong with this Betinho fuckface? The way he writes makes me want to jump off a cliff. Not just the actual words, which are gross fucking bullshit, but the motherfucking longwindedness. Brevity and precision are taught in school for a reason.

        • See discussion below about the use of deliberately opaque language as a tool to fuck with people. It’s not that he would love to say his thing more succinctly, if only he could. It’s that he *has* to talk “around” what he means, because what he means is so objectionable.

  7. Sensual Dancing in 3 feet of space; the serious face is only a bonus! Very funny!

    • OMG, is that shot in a … bathroom? I think it is — I spy a towel rack and possibly some plumbing fittings. Is it a woo tradition? It certainly skyrocketed Fozzie’s career.

    • She is less graceful than I am, and I’m a spine patient with several bad lumbar discs.
      Contrary to accusations that cat ladies are all just jealous haters: this cast of characters actually makes me feel so much better about my life.

  8. The guy in that picture of the couple looks less “devoted” and more “Is saying ‘You’d better be f***ing smiling’ through gritted teeth.”

    And that gif? The levels of self-delusion among these folks never ceases to amaze and amuse.

  9. post BM breakup in September appears to be annual tradition

    gotta be honest, though, if I am 17 old boy and get propositioned by a cool mom, gonna be hard to say no

  10. I have a theory (forgive me if this idea has been posited before). The woo-speak language that they use that doesn’t actually make sense, filled with peculiar words and often grammatically incorrect–it occurred to me that their language is left intentionally vague and nonsensical so that their victims/marks will mentally fill in the blanks with something that makes sense to them personally.

    Sort of like a psychic reading or a horoscope, where the statements are broad and vague and can apply to many circumstances, the individual thinks “Yes, that’s exactly how it is!” but it’s not the statement, it’s the person’s brain that has fleshed out the statements with things that are meaningful to them.

    Do you think the mangled language they use is an effort to not say anything specific, leaving it open to interpretation? I wonder if that’s one of the tricks of their trade?

    • That’s a technique from Neuro-Linguistic Programming, which a number of these woos and the woos they worship (wooship) are into.

  11. Donkey just threw up six or seven SJW posts on FB in a matter of seconds. Does she even bother to read or watch half of what she posts? I particularly enjoyed the “Brilliant” she accorded to the “economics of dining as a couple.” Is the masculine not paying, Donkey? This seems out of whack with your 1950s gender norms.

    There’s more. On wind turbines and gendered clothing and shelter dogs and Donald Trump and this: “I PRAY that cities will start implementing this. We’ve GOT to get away from a culture that worships and prioritizes cars to the detriment of human beings, healthy, happy communities and the environment.”

    Hey, Donk! Rather than praying for an end to car worship or poisonous sugar, or shilling some lame idea from one of your woo butt buddies, why don’t you actually DO SOMETHING?

  12. I fell down a Bentinho black hole and found this charming quote: “Pain and suffering has its place in the bigger picture, that is why some beings choose to be raped at an early age. It’s not that they are doing something wrong with their vibration, it’s that they want to learn specific lessons in this life.”

    These woos are the fucking worst. Like Tucker Max and Gavin McInnes of the patchouli set.

    • “The person – as example – that raped and killed little boys and girls, is still absolutely worthy of existence, of unconditional love, and is already timelessly forgiven. Shocked? Get over yourself and your idiotic opinions about right and wrong. You know nothing. Be humble by feeling worthy yourself, and granting that worthiness to others (who are simply, ‘the rest of yourself’).”

    • I had this exact conversation with a crazed former cult member at the Y! That child abuse- and -molestation victims *choose* their molestation and abuse. She argued that perhaps such victims were actually perpetrators in a past life. But regardless, they bring it on themselves because it’s “a hangup” and/or to learn something from the experience; therefore, the perpetrators are totally cool and we should not judge or in any way punish them.

      I told her to please fuck herself, emphatically.

      • How are there people who read vile shit like this and then pay him for life lessons? He’s also anti-feminist, but that seems quaint when compared to blaming survivors for their rapes.

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