Julia Allison (aka Rainbow) Is On The Grift

bidness lady

Still struggling to express your authentic self beyond the druggie, faux hippie, white trustafarian festival circuit? Goddess Rainbow will show you how to work the mainstream while simultaneously transforming your soul!

Do you have a transformational message you’d like to share with the world? Join founder of Women in Community, Myka McLaughlin as she interviews journalist/tv personality and author of Experiments in Happiness, Julia Allison (aka Rainbow) on her insider’s account of how to share your message beyond our festival culture through the mega media outlets. In a candid interview, Julia will share her personal journey from a mainstream “media whore” to a conscious crusader for an authentic world, demystifying how traditional media works – and why it matters – so that we can all take the depth and transformation in the festival scene to a wider audience, influencing millions of people to deepen their consciousness and expand into their higher selves.

Julia will teach you how to hack the system, so you can shift paradigms and crusade for truth in the dissemination of information to the public. This presentation will empower you to go back to your communities and talk to journalists, tv stations, radio shows and bloggers to GET YOUR MESSAGE OF CONSCIOUSNESS AND TRANSFORMATION OUT THERE. And if you’re still struggling to discover your message or make money from sharing your message, Myka will share powerful tips on how she helps entrepreneurs, artists and healers crack the code on their unique message and make great money in the process.

Finally, Julia will share her personal discovery of how she illuminated her most important messages and learnings in her upcoming book, Experiments in Happiness. You’ll leave with not only the practical power to share your message through the media, but also a surprising insight that will increase the potency of your transformational message for the masses ten-fold!

Julia Allison is a​ nationally recognized ​journalist, ​thought-leader, ​​inspirational speaker​, performance artist​ and former tv ​personality. She is currently finishing her first book, ​”​Experiments in Happiness,” to published in 2016 by St. Martin’s Press. A veteran commentator and tv host, Allison has made over 1,000 tv appearances on nearly every network, including CNN, MTV, ABC, NBC, CBS, Fox and E! In 2012, she starred in her own BRAVO tv documentary series​ (aka reality show), something she now describes as “a​ rather unpleasant, oddly fascinating, very​ unlikely​​ bootcamp for the soul.”

Allison got her start in journalism as a columnist for Georgetown University when she was an undergraduate​; ​to date she has published over 400 articles for publications as diverse as The New York Times, ELLE, Newsweek, New York Magazine, The Guardian and Cosmopolitan, covering everything from Burning Man to Comic Con to New York Fashion Week to the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. ​S​he ​wrote a long running ​dating ​column for Time Out New York, a love column for ELLE and an internationally syndicated tech​​nology​ ​& culture column for Tribune Media Services. She is one of only a handful of women ever to be featured on the cover of WIRED magazine​, representing a new generation of cunning, innovative journalism.

She has spoken at MIT, Wharton, Harvard, and at ​numerous ​conferences around the world about​ new media,​ ​innovation, ​personal branding, entrepreneurship,​ human potential, transformational culture, creativity​ and happiness.​ ​A recovering social media addict ​​with over 400k combined Facebook and Twitter followers, she’s lived in New York, LA, Chicago​ and Washington, DC, where she worked on Capitol Hill as the youngest full time legislative staff member in the 107th Congress​.

After years of falling in love and getting ​repeatedly ​heartbroken, she married herself triumphantly at Burning Man this past year. Now she lives, loves​ ​​and experiments with happiness (and a lot of outdoor yoga) in San Francisco.​​ She believes in magic.

Don’t we all?

Julia Allison: Author. Artist. Authentic Woo. Only at Envision Festival 2015!



    • “Julia will share her personal journey from a mainstream ‘media whore’ to a conscious crusader for an authentic world”


      you guys


      I just rolled my eyes so hard they are stuck to the back of my skull

  1. She married herself triumphantly!

    Not that you could tell that from her February 2013 website, though.

    Such a social media expert, our Julie!

    • I wonder if she doesn’t own the platform that the site’s on (meaning she owes someone money if she wants changes made). Making simple changes to a website really isn’t all that difficult (and I’m no tech person).
      She’s prob trying to squeeze money out of the book deal. I’d be pissed if I was the publisher who fronted her money and none of it went to updating her site.

      • Even if she didn’t own the platform, as long as she had control of her DNS records, then she could repoint the domain to a new hosting service.

        • Couldn’t she be locked out if she owed someone money? I just can’t image (and I know she’s lazy) that she didn’t scam someone into working on it for her or during one of her manic phases she wouldn’t at least update some stuff. Add a new picture (all the faxutoshoots) Add Coobie-something.
          I mean I’m pretty much and idiot and I figured it out.

          • It’s very likely she owes someone money and is locked out. It’s equally likely that Miss I Taught Myself HTML in High School who is dumber than a bag of rocks and completely lacking in curiosity and follow-through, has no clue how to begin to parse these words you are saying.

            Or we could be wrong. Now that the book is pushed out to 2016, she could be grifting somebody as we speak to update it. I wonder if this will be part of her interview?

          • I think Goat Soap holds the keys … but WTF would he add? She hasn’t done anything to speak of …

        • Oooo! Do you know something? My source won’t humble herself with Donkey-related inquiries to colleagues anymore. Apparently even admitting that you are aware of La Donque is gauche in some circles.

      • I remember her crowdsourcing a recommendation for a DIY web-building platform almost a year ago. I offered her several suggestions. She’s probably too lazy to have followed through and is looking for another mark she can con into doing it for her.

  2. “to a conscious crusader for an authentic world”
    It’s like if they type it-it HAS to be true. I wish people who pathologically lied were afflected with real Pinocchio Syndrome.

  3. OMG you guys! I agreed to help out at my friend’s bar tonight because she said they would be really busy and just lost a waitress. She failed to mention that it would be busy because they had a JAM BAND playing! Me and about 100 hippies! It was like Shamti visited some kind of retibustion on me for dogging her online!

    BTW hippies are cheap as hell. I can’t count the number of time tonight someone asked me to make change for a dollar so they could tip 25 cents.

      • The doorman suggested we keep a bottle of Lysol by the door to spray everyone down. No joke, those folks stank to high heaven.
        I can handle a hippy or two, but 100 in an enclosed space was too much.

  4. So she’s added performance artist to the list of things she is(n’t). Good grief.

    I wonder if her set of tips to hack the system include purchasing fake followers?

    • Somebody else re-wrote her bio (Momsers?) because that whole Wired positioning is new and not in the style of Donkey’s writing. Except, there’s nothing journalism-y about her cunning famewhore-ery.

    • Stage an embarrassing Midwestern-hick spectacle at Burning Man and want to cover up the mess? Easy, just position it as performance art.

    • Yeah, right.

      Taking drugs and gyrating aimlessly to music is NOT performance art.

      • This is obviously her extension of “my life is art”. Performance artists do not just hula hoop (of course) or pose in their rainbow bras.

      • Morrocan I do have to say I love your angles blog. Not sure if I’ve already told you, but it bears repeating if so.

        • Thank you so much. I wrote something so mean about one of the children this weekend that I actually felt bad about it for hours and had to remind myself that they are not real people.

  5. Old Raunch is presenting there too. Take a look at this lineup and see which of these things is not like the other. How does her thmart busineth lady persona fit in with a hippie festival? This is really strange positioning on her part. It’s as if she’s taking advice from Ali about needing two identities.

    And when, exactly, is the last time she’s “hacked” the media? In the Arrington and Uber incidents, her most recent media exposures, the media hacked HER.

    • Let’s don’t forget: the media also hacked Julia Allison when she got called out for faking her reason for being at NYFW when she was clomping around, trailing an unattached mic cord w/ a purloined NBC mic flag.

    • Strange that Skanaktron is stinking up any woo festival as “Alexis Neely.” Did you get a load of some of the other names at this stinkfest? Smellsberg’s sleazy buddy Philippe Lewis (real name: Ron Lipschitz), Jen Friend AKA The Living Liquid Crystal, David MagicHands, Zahrah Sita, instructor in Mushroom Magic. About the only half sane thing I could find among the presentations is Jennifer Leigh Smith’s talk: “Why Are Trees on the Equator the Coolest?”

      • Ha!

        They are using multiple names, just like con artists do.

        What an amazing coincidence!

        • And like people who are wanted for questioning (or more) in multiple states. Total coincidence I’m sure.

        • You mean David “Eben Pagan” DeAngelo? Or is it Eben “David DeAngelo” Pagan?

          Depends on the day of the week. And when the checks are due in.

    • How does her thmart busineth lady persona fit in with a hippie festival? This is really strange positioning on her part. It’s as if she’s taking advice from Ali about needing two identities.

      100% She basically wants to BE Shamti now.

    • Maybe Julia is the person Ye Olde Ranch was complaining who was lying in mktg material.

      • Great point. I could see Skankatron being pissed off at Donks pulling her “thmart busineth lady persona” with ease, in bio and photo.

        Yes, we know most of Donks’ bio is exaggerated, but she is actually connected in some way to most of the media cited/sited/sighted in her bio… whereas Shanti? She interviews coat ghouls for a living, in her dirty underwear and mite-infested feathers. *shudders*

          • Yes of course, Donk’s bio is ridiculous, but if you put their bios side by side, who has more big name media mentions/”experiences”?

            We know the truth behind Donks’ bio, but to the average desperate woo, looking to part with some cash for a media-related seminar, the names in Donks’ bio would win over Shanti’s in a heartbeat — and Shanti knows that. She’s gotta be at least a tad jealous of the Donks for that.

          • i still disagree. Donkeys bio is 99% fake. A good percentage of the people in this forum, including yours truly, have more impressive credentials.

  6. Apropos of nothing (well, not nothing — cuz my houseguest asked the other day about the RS video, which led to me *trying* to explain JA in under three minutes) we’re watching Mass Despised.

    It’s way to effing early for her gaping maw & affectations.


    Where it says “published over 400 articles” should say “crowdsourced over 400 topics using her facebook & Twitter feeds”.

    Envision Festival regrets the error.

    • I’ll never understand why she lists the cities she has lived as some sort of accomplishment.

      • I know.

        It would be different if the bio said “started a family in Ulan Bator, rose the corporate ladder in Tokyo and opened a restaurant in Normandy”, but… Chicago, LA, SF & NY? (specially LA & SF, where she probably spent a grand total of 25 days in each).

      • Because she has nothing else and her focus is always on image. She thinks it makes her look worldly. Sadly to a potential employer it makes her look unemployable (which truthfully) she is unemployable.

        • She sees these as prestigious places for media and broadcast credentials.

          Or more accurately, she sees major league media and broadcast cities as smokescreens to cover for her ineptitude in every single thing she’s ever done in these cities.

          Note to lurkers: She was FIRED from every single media job she had. And her shit TV show was not renewed because of dismally low ratings, and she was consistently the most hated among the three women on that show.

          • To Julia they are here media outlets or beaureaus. Like the NBC London news beaureau. That thought makes me tee hee roar!

  8. You know what, the “thought leader” and “performance artist” are desperate, childlike lies, but bitch, I want to SEE THOSE 400 ARTICLES. I want to see a list of them, because that’s the most crazypants lie I’ve ever heard. It’s like saying “I just sneezed 212 times!” She is one of the most pathological liars I’ve ever encountered.

    Wow, she’s only a little bit back and now I remember how much I loathe her worthless, grifting ass.

    • I bet its more like 35 articles that Julia Allison
      actually had published, maybe 60 tops.

      Julia Allison is the lying-est liar who lies — #TRUTH

    • what about the 1000 TV appearances?
      It’s got to be a huge lie….100 maybe….500..no way. So it’s got to be 1000!!!

      • She had the Star job for what, a year? This would have meant she appeared on TV close to 3x a day, nearly every day of the year. She’s only been on TV a handful of times since then.

        Fucking liar.

      • she’s probably counting every single scene she appeared in for ‘miss advised’ as individual appearances. plus, wasn’t she on one or two of those vh1 compliation shows, you know, like “I love the 90s,” where they do a countdown of songs fitting a particular subject, and have various people make comments on them? she probably counts each comment she made as an appearance, and multiplies out for every rerun.

        basically her ‘appearances’ are like syndication money–every time there’s a rerun, she adds another appearance.

        • Julia Allison is counting every time she’s masturbated to one of her 35 television appearances as an actual on-air event — hence: ‘[Julia] Allison has made over 1,000 tv appearances’

      • Excuse YOU – Mulia Malison has appeared on (a) television (set) at LEAST 1,000 times. Probably more. That monitor in her bathroom is set on a LOOP you know (and THAT is a term learned from being around the media ALL*snap THE*snap TIME*snap). So PROBABLY it’s more like A MILLION times. Think about that while you’re being reported next time.

    • Seriously, I feel the bile rising already. I HATE liars, especially those who lie to get what they want and who get away with it.

      • Same. I don’t often want to punish anyone, but I want all liars to feel WRATH + PAIN.

        • Last fall she wrote about the hundreds of times she had flown home to Chicago since she left home and, while I am not a mathematician, that seemed very off to me.

          Lying is her jam.

    • RE Julia Allison’s pathologically-constructed bio, I’m reminded of the quote that goes something like: ‘… a lie so “colossal” that no one would believe that someone “could have the impudence to distort the truth so infamously’


    • Anytime someone refers to themselves as a “thought-leader” I cringe. Others can say that about someone but never can it be said by one about oneself. And no one thinks she’s a thought-leader.

  9. Ugh, that tired old lie filled bio seems a little….dusty in 2015.

    TV star? What has she done besides the odd local news appearance since being on a failed reality show in 2011?

    • 2012 was Miss Advised, wasn’t it?

      – Went on CNN as part of a multi-person opinion segment, insulted Native Americans and was never invited back
      – Got called out in the media and tossed out of NY Fashion Week for being outed using a fake mic and pretending to cover the event
      – Got called out in the media for sticking her nose in the Arrington scandal
      – Got called out in the media for her role in an Uber privacy-invading stunt
      – Lied that she was a national spokesmodel for a clothing company, faking an ad campaign and a press release
      – Spoke on a panel in front of about 10 people at U. Penn and SXSW about some lame topic she had no reason to speak about, whined about “haters”
      – Wrote a weak NYT style section article that she only got through personal connections, bragging that she revised it back and forth with the editor over six months and that it took eight drafts to get right.
      – Got some brain-dead publisher to green-light a book proposal that had been passed around in the industry as a laughable joke
      – Staged a self-wedding publicity stunt that went over like a lead balloon in the media, ending up with one Jezebel article mocking her mercilessly and most people in the comments wondering who she was
      – Spent months after the “wedding” whining publicly on Facebook about how miserable she is being single and crowdsourcing everything under the sun that she could Google herself
      – Traveled to half a dozen hippie festivals, mostly so she could stalk her then-boyfriend who ended up dumping her after dating her for three months, and then brayed about how she only wanted to attend them again if she could speak at them
      – Used her contacts to suck up to highers-up at Burning Man, none of whom seem to want anything to do with her
      – Got dumped by both a wannabe line cook and a hippie carny musician
      – Grifted free stuff from companies like Yandy, Coobie and some pajama company by lying about how many Facebook and Twitter followers she has

      Did I leave anything out?

      • I was thinking that the NYT article was seven re-writes over four months time (or is it the other way around? No bueno, either way) but yeah, great summary on your part.


        • You may be right on this, Bray. I’d have to fact-check that. But it was close, and yeah, it was egregious for how many revisions and how much time it usually takes to write something like that.

          I think most of us figured that she’d promoted all her friends (Avocado mostly) in early drafts and the editor nixed all that.

      • You might add:

        Claims to be a social media expert but hasn’t updated her website since 2013; has no blog or online presence unless you count Facebook and Twitter.

        Claims to be a journalist; the reality is that she wrote one article about the music festivals she’d attended, and everything else was silly tweets about OMG dating boys is like, so hard, you guys! or little puff pieces about texting boys.

        • Right! Claims to be a journalist, but wrote one article per year, the NYT fluff piece being one, and the only other article since 2012 I can recall was the “OMG Beloved Grandmother™ sent me Derpin from Heaven” article for XOjane.

  10. Going back to comments about this from the other Dental Mental post, it is astounding no one in this scene recognizes the human phenomenon of ritual, transformation, the grotesque and the absurd which predates recorded history.

    Say what you want about Americans losing their pagan tribes and the ritual festivals of transformation (harvest gluttony, death, rebirth, etc) – the fact is these rituals still exist and are maintained in carnival, holloween, even Xmas. AND THE WHOLE POINT IS THAT WE CAN NOT EXIST IN THAT WORLD FOREVER – IT IS A TEMPORARY STATE, NEEDED FOR A SPECIFIC AMOUNT OF TIME. AFTERWARD, WE HAVE TO RETURN TO WORK.

    Jesus – any of the idiots who went to grad school for literature in this scene should have read Rabelais and his World by Bakhtin.

      • I mean in the humanities. You may have heard that Alexis Neely, Liar, was #1 in her Georgetown law class, and Swainy Todd, Serial Killer Adjacent, went to dental school. So I hear.

        • How can I use ‘Serial Killer Adjacent’ on my own Facebook page today!?? best thing ever ever. Also, GET YOUR MESSAGE OF CONSCIOUSNESS AND TRANSFORMATION OUT THERE is bugging me so much- stfu, no one wants a message from any of you, also pls stop stealing grammarian’s schtick.

    • YES. thank you!! Humans have been ritualizing and celebrating and festival-ing (or whatever) for all of time. I love how she assumes no one knows about it except the SO ENLIGHTENED woos. And yes to the thought that we cannot live in that world forever. I’ll be sure to think of her on Tuesday when I hope to be dancing in the streets with hundreds of other people in costume at Mardi Gras.

    • Also, Donk is the newbie to the “festival scene” or “transformational culture” (barf) or whatever. What could she possibly teach them about “sharing the message”? Does she think that everyone is in the closet about their attendance at festivals, and never talk about it? There are people at these festivals with JOBS in the media, dummy. Perhaps she can teach Burning Man Corporation to set up its own MySpace.

  11. When and why has she ever spoken about entrepreneurship? She has never had a business.

    She was on the cover of Wired in a mocking, why-is-this-person-internet-famous-for-doing-nothing way, and not for being a woman in technology, because she is not and never has been a woman in technology.

    She has never worked in marketing nor branding, nor in any creative field. She was a talking head for Fox, gossiping about Britney Spears.

    For what media outlet did she cover Comic Con? Where is that article? Ditto the White House Correspondents dinner.

    All lies and exaggerations. She even lies about her “transformation” and “paradigm shift”– same delusional liar, just a different group she’s fooling. Oh, and she now wears fake hippie bracelets to look “bohemian.” She’s as bohemian as Nancy Reagan.

    • Julia Allison is a woman in technology? LOLfuckingLOLasIF!
      Julia Allison was on technology’s dick, wallet-hunting, period.

      • Hello, she owns an iPhone and knows how to put a pink cover on it! Also, she crashes parties where there are tech guys, and blows kisses to the camera– that’s almost the same as speaking at a technology conference.

        • Oh, and Sony mistakenly paid her to be a spokesperson for VAIO without realizing she’d be simultaneously tweeting and posting her devotion to Apple products.

    • For Julia, attended = “covered”

      This explains the Washington Correspondents’ dinner she crash…err, “covered”. I’m surprised Davos isn’t on the list, since she “covered” that equally by just showing up for parties.

      I also want to know, exactly what did she “speak” about at MIT, Wharton and Harvard, and to whom? I think MIT was some sort of extracurricular club meeting and then she fake-posed at the podium afterward, right? But what was Wharton and Harvard? I can’t imagine it was anything legit.

      • who can forget her Harvard ‘pre frosh’ romp (she wished!) with those adorbs fan girls? Tho theriouth.

      • She didn’t exactly “speak at Wharton”– she was one of six panelists on a panel about women who “are launching or trying to launch a business,” and said panel was one of many panels given at the 2009 Wharton Women in Business Conference, given at a hotel.

        So not AT Wharton, not FOR the business school, but an extracurricular conference where you could which panel to attend.

        The women speaking on the OTHER panels included the senior VP of Investments at Merrill Lynch;
        the President and CEO of United Way of Southeastern Pennsylvania; the managing director at UBS Investment Bank;
        Managing Director of Credit Suisse; and the development director of the Pennsylvania Real Estate Investment Trust.

        And then there was Julia Allison of NonSociety.copm. No joke, that’s how her namecard read.

  12. It seems like Ali Shanti, who HATES people who lie in their marketing, should have a word with her pal, Donks.

    • Perhaps Ali caught a glimpse of actual wang and Julia is the “he” Shanti is referring to.

      I kid. It’s actually a bit of a relief to see a picture of a sereeus biznuz laydee at the top of the page.

    • When would she ever find the time? Skankatron is too busy updating her Facebook status. The emotional cripple is in an OMG! open relationship with an OMG! jedi and posted a gazillion paragraphs about it because she’s such a rebel, such a crusader, such a solipsistic exhibitionist. She’s certainly not a parent.

      • She will lose interest in Jedi in short order. She’s a barracuda and he’s Fozzie. This will not end well. Run, Fozzie, run!

        • I didn’t see the beginning of the Filekking, but I wonder if Skankatron starts off each of her relationships making these guys feel speshul, granting them exclusivity, convinces them to move in so she can score a free babysitter/maid/manservant, then, when they’re feeling settled, the honeymoon phase ends and she’s all, “I’m so poly! You knew this! Why so sad?”

          • She must exact promises of indentured servitude — seeing’s how $wainy Toad need never work a day in his life (& face it, he won’t even do the necessary work to see his own kids, so why would he want to parent Ali’s kids?) — Jedi only won a one-man race by default.

  13. I read the We post on Shantitown’s FB, and oh my stars the way she thanks people in the comments as if she just won an Oscar. I’m still giggling about it. And she pulls a JABA in the post itself, talking about how she wasn’t initially attracted to Fozzie and didn’t see him as sexual because he wasn’t fully “in his power.” Oh man, BONES is all that’s going to be left of that child. Bones I tell you.

    • Note Dr. Mental, DDS’ subdued emoji reaction. I had to assume part of her “figuring out how to update to an open relationship on Facebook” meant how to first remove her open relationship with Crazy Wallet.

      • The :I and a total lack of hearts made me snort. Poor Dr. Goldpants, who knew being at an open relationship with a complete whackjob isn’t all glitter and heart emojis?

        Oh, right. YOUR WIFE.

      • Speaking of Dr. Mental, have you seen this?


        It’s really sad watching him implode. He was obviously a successful dude who was surrounded with good people who truly care about his well being. Watching his breakdown is fascinating…he posts on social media all day long. Fights with everyone. Challenges people to FaceTime and YouTube videos. I almost feel dirty watching this unfold.

        That said, I am in love with Richard Wehrle.

        • There is another sane person named Lorne Lavine who’s trying to help, which means that the angry, triggered Ryan Swain will accuse him of being angry and triggered.

          You know how we often wonder why nobody steps in to offer the delusional Donkey such an intervention? Here’s a guy who’s SO.BLESSED. to have friends who’ll step up when he’s in trouble, and he’s too far gone to appreciate their help.

          • He just posted a video in which his wife says she is tripping balls. Shit is getting real ugly.

          • At Ballerina – yes, now it’s game on. He’s basically trying to “expose her,” I guess. To show she was hanging with the woo and doing drugs herself.

            She is in PA now with the kids (where her fan is from).

          • I can’t look away.
            And please add me to the Richard Wehrle fan club. I love the way he perfectly calls people out on their shit.

          • Oy. Recent entries on his page are depressing me for the sake of those kids. Anyone see where sandy sidekick took it upon himself to record one side of a ph call from a concerned friend? This will *not* be one of those cases where no one saw it coming.

          • so many people who clearly care about him write long, well-meaning posts, and his response is always “I didn’t read this.” such a narcissistic, megalomaniacal piece of shit.

            and, okay, he posts one, 3-minute video of his wife on drugs. meanwhile, his facebook provides continuous updates showing his own, ongoing drug usage and obvious break with reality.

            I’m glad his ex is back in pa with their kids and near her family. best to put as much distance as possible between them. although he already posted that he’s not “jumping through hoops” to see his kids, telling himself to “hold the line, ryan,” so even if they were in co, I doubt he could even be bothered.

          • Lawyers are just salivating and rubbing hands together at how many billable hours they’ll rack up on this one.

        • RRR will cut a bitch for moving in on RW. He used the term woo grifter (is that common outside of the basement?) Was he a basement dweller or maybe a recent one?

          • Maybe he googled “Ali Shanti, Relationships
            Wide Open™” & ended up here on RBD …

    • It’s ridiculous. She admits this is an “open relationship.” She also admitted she is in an “open relationship” with Dr. Swain. No congrats post for that one? When commenters are asking her what she means by an open relationship, she doesn’t answer. Hey, people? That means the relationship is not exclusive. So hooray for her!

      • Swain was the one who announced the open relationship with Old Raunch, who then chastised him for upsetting poor li’l Mikey’s feewings.

        Makes me wonder if Swain got in a pre-emptive strike to try to derail Harold and Maude’s coupling-up.

      • I am in an open relationship with Edward Norton. We have agreed to see other people at this time.

        • My relationship with Chris Hemsworth is so open, I haven’t even bothered to tell him about it. #SoEvolved

    • Tween Skankatron’s endless “I’d like to thank the Academy” post also reminded me of a sleazier 17 Magazine or Young Miss regular guest column, such as “Was My Face Red!”:

      “But first, a quick trip to San Francisco where he dropped me at a mansion for a rope bondage birthday workshop led by a dear sister of mine (I was definitely wondering what he thought about that!) and he went to stay with a friend for the night.”

      Oh, Ali, you naughty woo! Do go on! At least for 20 more paragraphs! Dad will make lunch for the kids today (again).

    • Didn’t she and Craig do the same negging ‘I wasn’t into him because he seemed like a pussy’ and ‘I wasn’t into her because she is a ball breaking man bitch’ thing?

    • that whole thing was ridiculous.

      “I was *finally* very happily single. In fact, I was on a no-man diet.”
      you go girl, you do you, who needs men?

      “The following day we drove down to LA [from San Francisco] and I used the entire car road to get caught up on my computer and take business calls.”
      oh, so you spent six hours in a car with someone and, instead of treating him like a traveling companion and spending the time talking to him, you treated him like he was your chauffeur and spent the time ignoring him to talk on the phone and work on your computer? rude bitch.

      “When we got close to where he was dropping me (at the house of a guy I was staying with — the no-man diet wasn’t a no sex diet, just a no “you’re the one” diet)”
      wait, so you were happily single *and* on a no-man diet, except you’re still fucking whoever? how is this a no-man diet? that big black dildo wasn’t able to do it for you?

      “I was having a small birthday gathering at my sister’s house, just down the road from where I was staying with the guy I had gone to visit. I asked Michael if he wanted to come, and if so, told him to go to my sister’s and hang there with her until I got there.
      He agreed, though I imagine it felt awkward to him. And before I showed up, he texted me to say he was leaving because he had to be somewhere else.
      I asked him “Is this an example of you closing your heart?”
      He said, “yes.”
      I asked him if he wanted to make a different choice and he said “yes” and when I got to my sister’s he had driven back.
      I was impressed.”

      so you know this guy is interested in you, and you tell him to go hang out with your sister (who he’s never met) until you get there, because you’re busy screwing another guy right now? and then when he decides to find his balls and tell you he’s leaving, you treat him like a petulant child who needs to make another choice.

      “Coming out the other side of the challenge, we’ve decided to be a “We”. We are exploring what that means together, but for me it means commitment and partnership through it all – the ups and the downs, the learning, growth and evolution.
      So far, what we have come to about that is that we are building our “We” together. At this time, I do not want to be a We with anyone else. Cuddles, kisses and sharing love with others will continue for me as that is the nature of my heart, but there will not be another “We” here, until we decide that together.”

      so basically nothing has changed, he’ll still be driving you to some other guy’s house so you can fuck him, but he gets the joy of being part of your “we.”

      congratulations, michael, and welcome to your first cuckold relationship!

      • So basically she was fucking around with a lot of guys trying to find the one.

        Why do the woos need to obfuscate everything?

        One a Skankatron, always a Skankatron.

      • So mission accomplished, good job. Skank found a guy who she could treat like dirt and would still come back for seconds and thirds. And then will hate because she can’t respect him for being subservient and will kick him to the curb.

        Tho enlightened.

    • Can someone buy this floozy an “a” ??!?

      ‘… on pedestal …’
      ‘… in relationship …’

    • “Oh man, BONES is all that’s going to be left of that child. Bones I tell you.”

      This cracked me up. Couldn’t agree more. Poor bastard is in for it.

      The question is really days or weeks…

    • The first rule of dating someone younger, according to Dan Savage (who’s a REAL columnist): leave them undamaged, or in better shape than they were.

      Don’t mess with them, don’t project your insecurities onto them, don’t triangulate with other people. Take care not to damage their young, tender hearts.

      • Don’t steal their savings?

        Because I am sure she is gonna leave them penniless.

  14. Book deal is dead. She’s shopping around for a new one and has given herself a year to not make a fool of herself, no?

    • this does seem to be the first bio since she got her book deal that doesn’t include the name of the publisher, doesn’t it?

      • So many book industry insiders here …
        Can we not we get a substantiated ‘yay’ or ‘nay’?

        • I tried with two different industry types; no one they spoke to had ever heard of JA or of the replacement editor. Best I could do.

          • I bet she couldn’t provide proof that it’s still on if her life depended on it. She’d sooner swear that it is going to be published Fall 2021.

          • I think the book is on its way to Great Graveyard of Unfinished Donkey Projects ™, where it will be laid to rest next to 50 Weddings in 50 States, the Happiness RV, Coobie’s one bra a day and many others that only catladies can remember.

          • Who even says a book is coming out and names the year a YEAR LATER? Just “working on a book” if it’s not coming out soon.

          • She’s also already positioned herself as “author of…” In this bio. She’s not an author yet.

      • I just realized that the second mention of her book in the bio does mention the publisher. my eyes glazed over before I got there, though, so I missed it on the first reading.

  15. O/T Writers or people who work at a desk-I could use a little help. Last two years are the first I’ve sat at a desk and I’m running into two problems: organization of the day and legs swelling and turning a lovely shade of purple/blue. Any tips are greatly appreciated.

    • You may benefit from a lymphatic massage — if one isn’t doable right now re: $ or time, there are youtube videos that show how to self-perform them — getting the sludge moving does make some people feel whupped afterwards, so an Epson Salts bath to follow wouldn’t be a bad idea either. Good luck; feel mo bettuh. 🙂

    • I hear “Fit Bit” or other work-out-watch-devices are good b/c they remind you to move around during the day. Your employer should pay for an ergonomic footrest or what ever else might help you be more comfortable at your desk. Make friends who will drag you away (hahaha…a smoker, if you can find one…they always need someone to hang out with). If it is a big company, join in office stuff during lunch. For organizing my day, I work a bit of a late shift (9 am to 6 pm). I spend the first hour/hour and half answering emails and “keeping things moving” what ever is in my inbox. Then I plan on how I am going to split up my day based on assignments and deadlines. I like having multiple assignments going at the same time, breaking them down into small, daily milestones. Sometimes that is not possible, then I am just a zombie, in the zone, gitting ‘er done…but I always pay for it later in the form of neck/muscle aches/lockjaw. End of the day, I make sure email in box is clean and I’ve sent out any requests that I need answered to get the day going tomorrow.

      • Thanks everyone. I never thought of getting in and out of a car 10 times a day in hot weather as exercise but I guess it was in comparison to current situation. I’ve been trying to remember to prop legs up and I have a terrible habit of sitting cross-legged on the floor or bed which I’m trying to break (I had my dad rig my treadmill as a desk-which family is waiting to make AFHV entry from at some point) and that appears to help some but I can’t quite get the hang of it. (I know not really problems) just trying to adjust (and moving more eating less) may help the other problem that snuck up on me-extra lbs (9lbs in 6 months-I took living like Thanksgiving a little to literally). Or not having snacks next to me-grazing all day long might be great for cows but not doing great things for me. I’ve tried getting myself on a schedule (up same time, etc) but can’t get a rhythm like I had for the last 15 years.
        I was checked last week for Raynad’s (?) she said it can be associated with PTSD and symptoms worsen with stress & anger (two things not unlike the rest of the world I’m not short on). Which explains the color but not the swelling I will try the massage (home version). Thank you for the information.

        I like the idea of Cubi (?) it’s a startup that’s like an under desk bike system but likely will be the same problem I have with treadmill desk (can’t walk and chew gum at the same time).
        Fit bit is out for me now $$ (but maybe I will have to set my phone alarm to remind me to get up). I know it seems silly to ask but I’ve tried a lot of things and sometimes it’s just better to ask the real experts (not JA type expert)-thanks again for all the great suggestions.

        • I have Raynaud’s, and one of the things that helps me (besides not sitting still for too long, and an alarm is a great idea for beating that) is watching my sodium intake. Which isn’t simple, I know!

          • AQ I’m sorry to hear about your Raynaud’s-from what I’ve read it can really be painful and awful (I hope your case is not to that extreme) I thought I was watching my sodium (I never salt anything) then I realized my diet is mainly bacon and Pringles-so good call and thank you!

            P to the 3 Thank you! I can’t get into the electronic organizers (i’m old) so I love the suggestion Dave Seah’s Emergent Task planner-right up my alley.

            AS-If I fall off the treadmill desk (rigged) that’s the next stop-thank you all so much-truly appreicate it!

    • Winchester, what about a process timer like the 30/30 app by Binary Hammer. You set up a list of tasks and allocate a certain amount of time to each one. Once the time runs out for a task, it moves to the next one. I’ve set it up to use with the Pomodoro method (which I need to get back to).

      Also check the Dave Seah’s Emergent Task planner:


      It’s paper based (there are samples you can print out). It lets you list the 3 most important tasks that day and also has a scheduling/time function to let you estimate the amount of time it takes.

      I also like the 99U blog (99u.com) for productivity and organizational tips.

    • A bit late on this… but would you consider getting a standing desk? They have ones that you can convert from a sitting to standing desk, but I’ve heard enough good things about standing and working that I would really like one.

  16. So how many dudes is Shanti bonking at the minute? Three?
    And yeah, Julia’s book deal sounds as DOA as the sad dentist’s grasp on reality.

    • So basically she had Fozzie drive her from SF, paid no attention to him because she was “busy” with her computer & phone doing “business”, then had him drop her off at the place of her latest Internet hook up for an afternoon of fucking and sucking, and sent him to wait for her at her sister’s, whom he had never met.

      Skankatron 3000 is one classy lady!

      • Imagine if genders were reversed. A jerk is a jerk, and one could blame the victim for being weak enough to fall for it, or one could blame the alpha for sensing vulnerability and being predatory.

        • If the genders were reversed, Jezebel would have started a petition to charge the Skankatron with sex crimes.

  17. OT (but donkey-related), just saw Billow & her husband competing on an upcoming episode of Restaurant Startup. Another point for RB.

  18. This is Cray Cray for reals. Truly he is far gone hopefully he’ll get himself together. Obviously ali cray cray and him suffer from the same drug addiction that creates a severe mental disconnection to reality. Yikes it’s like their life crisis directed them to hallucinating drugs that alters their mind and in their mind creates a new reality based on manipulating those around them.

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