A Whopping Six of Her 201K Followers Gave Enough of a Fuck To Retweet a Donkey

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Oh dear. More than 24 hours after the greatest New York Times piece ever published, and only a handful of retweets from her tens of thousands of bought followers. I guess you get what you pay for!

 

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93 COMMENTS

  1. And still couldn’t find it on Twitter from NYTs. If only everyone were as proud of donkey as she is of herself. Better warm up donkey don’t want to pull a hammy patting your hoof on your back.

    • It is under NYTimes Styles tweet. Have seen it a few times today via this. (Sorry!)

      Still, a dopey article that was barely readable.

  2. Six whole retweets?? Amazeballz, D0nkey!!
    No really, look … actualized amazeballz.

    Where does Julia Allison stand on NYT email rankings? Has she broken the record yet, did her redonkulous article finally reach the coveted title of “16th most emailed”?

  3. Looks like Avocado found a home in LA, sharing a house with Warwick Saint, Ariele White and Jess Johnson. Too bad no Donk-share….

    • I am wondering if Julia Allison and Warwick Saint are on the outs. He did a Bridal photo shoot for her and she’s only shown 2 of the pictures? And he’s never displayed any of them on his website or FB.

      I’m thinking someone didn’t get PAID.

        • Jess recently gave her a mention though in one of those “what I’m grateful for” posts indicating that Donkey would be participating in some upcoming grifter event she’s putting on about “finding your voice” or some such crap. She and Ariel White play ukulele together as a duet called The Shes and she’s referred to Ariel as “her wife and soulmate.”

          This is all getting very incestuous. I’m sure Donkey will inveigle herself into their little lair somehow. I don’t think she’ll stop trying to win back Avocado until he has another steady girlfriend (and even then…)

          • If Donkey sticks to her past behavior (and when hasn’t she?), when he starts dating a new tiny and cute she’ll force the issue with his friends, they’ll feel like they have to choose and she’ll be edged out.

        • she is also the one Donkey talked to for two hours about sacred heartbreak and then posted her phone’s end-call screen to prove she had the conversation. because she’s insane and has some ulterior motive, most likely.

      • Yeah, her gaping maw has no doubt been writing many a check that her raftass can’t cash — the four months of edits to that POS article axed all shills for the woo crowd, & she probably tried to pass that off after the fact as the “journalistic integrity” alleged (tongue-in-cheek) by Davidiot.

      • He also did some goddess shoot pics of her. Remember the one where Avocado “dropped by” while they were shooting?

    • OH she did that baby-smothering/party-pooping thing again! He announced this joyfully. Everyone is all, “yay!” And she comments, “Can I have credit please for bringing you guys together?” MEMEMEMEMEMEME and my sad neediness….

      The JIML is my mom and she’s just like this. There’s no joy to be had if it isn’t a chance for her to remind us that we don’t love her enough.

      • Julia Allison MAGIC!!!! So. SO. Happy to have so many beloveds under one roof! I can’t wait for the transformational art that will inevitably emerge. I love you all!!
        2 hrs · Like · 3

        Julia Allison PS. Do I get credit as the domicile matchmaker?
        2 hrs · Like · 2

        Julie, just stop. I’m begging you. Before you embarrass yourself even more.

        • Hear that, Avocado? Not only did she gift you that Onesie you wore once when high love so much, she also put a roof over your head. You practically owe your life to her, so give up already and be the current love of her life again.

        • Sheeeeit, DG! I assumed that was parody.
          I shoulda known …

          *ahem* Davidiot:
          have | hav/ | verb
          1. to possess, own, or hold.

          The Clam Dungeon = Hotel Donkadelphia …
          ‘You can check-out any time you like,
          but you can never leave!

      • The JIML is a first cousin – after I was in a horrific car accident, she posted something on my FB wall to the effect of “geesh someone will do ANYTHING for attention! he he he.”

    • Well that’s all the validation the yard beast needs-she’ll be even more off the charts smug and still for no reason. Never change.

      • Spelling his name wrong from his conference room-she’s just tho exthited her lil snausage fingers hit the wrong key.

      • Who has books on their CONFERENCE room table? Do really all of these people have the need to affirm that they are indeed smart, regardless of what the rest of the world thinks? It’s no wonder that money doesn’t like me, I don’t get people who have it. I honestly don’t.

        • Probably showed up unannounced, ready to offer a beej in exchange for more shout-outs, & they parked her raftass in his conference room, where she’s killing time, rearranging his belongings & taking selfies.

          Next up: a fauxto of the cleaning people who let her out of the closed, locked office.

    • 25 likes (about half are fans in the ‘stans, he seems to have them too). And one share, from some bint calling Donkey “ever-talented.”

    • I’m sure her sudden burning desire to get together with the Morons had nothing to do with the comments here questioning if she’s still friends with them. After all, SHE NEVER READS HERE!

    • Guarantee it’s an interview for her book. The only people she’s going to talk to are people she knows. I’m sure she’s demanding an interview with Avocado under some pretense.

  4. Also-man I’m JFA’ing all up in here-She didn’t ask people to retweet her “coobie” tweet but begged people to retweet this drivel. Such a good spokesdonkey ambASSaWhore.

  5. Dear Donkey, all this info will come out when you’re book does. Because you are a lying liar who lies. Do you think Miss Advised, Bravo and Andy Cohen didn’t scratch their heads and wonder why they got less ratings than you have fans? Hmmm… I WONDER WHY.

    Think the NY Times isn’t doing the same? I’m dying to know if telling a lie about bought Twitter and FB fans, ie saying they are genuine, in order to obtain work is actionable or just buyer beware.

    Is her current editor noticing that posts get maybe 6 – 10 likes, if any? I doubt they give a shit but really, darling, just how long can you keep up this ruse?

  6. I snorteled that she begged people to SHARE the article on FB, even tagging Avocado’s Mom, and NO ONE SHARED IT. No one. And 11 people liked it. 11 people. Out of how ever many hundred of thousand “fans.”

    • Momvocado didn’t respond to that post at all. Probably because she’s in South America. You’d think Donkey would know that considering how close they are.

    • A dorky but super-sweet girl I went to high school with just knitted her first scarf and posted a picture of it on FB. She got over five times the likes as Donk did on her groundbreaking NYT article.

      The moral of the story: Stop being an asshole, Jules, and people will acknowledge you.

  7. Wow!

    The NY Times posted the story on their facebook feed too and all she got was 6 (six) retweets?

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAA!!

    • JFA’ing myself to point out that Donkey’s facebook posting of her oh-my-God AMAZEBALLS groundbreaking New York f-ing Times story got 40 likes.

      The picture of me (ME ME ME!!!!) making crème brûlée with a blowtorch I posted last week, on the other hand, got well over 50 likes.

  8. Donks posted some fake overheard conversation between two guys who basically said Burners can be intense in relationships and when it works out its awesome but when it doesn’t watch out! She deleted it.

      • It didn’t seem like the kind of thing she’d delete. Basically a shout out to herself for being an intense Burner special snowflake. Made up of course, probably to show Avocado that intense is a good thing. Which is stupid because any chick he dates is likely to be a Burner. Just not a mentally ill one.

  9. Holy shit, those books on a conference room table are just SUCH PRETENTIOUS BULLSHIT. I mean really? Really, Dave Morin, you have to show the world that you’re OMG smart? How much of Capital have you read, by the way? These DOUCHES.

    Anyone read the NY Mag article on AirBNB? Those founders seem like a couple of blowhard, in love with themselves fucktards too. I can’t with any of these people.

    My bro has been on the start-up/tech scene for almost 20 years, and he kant with any of these people neither. He says “tech” is filled with so many giant, narcissistic assholes. And the true, code-loving geeks like him are hard to find these days. It’s the showy, self-obsessed, fame-obsessed “artists” that are everywhere.

    That shot of Davin Morin’s conference table with the books placed just so really set off my brayge alert. Maybe it’s the Merlot I downed?

    • I dunno … I suspect it’s all on Fauxtoshoot Director D0nk …

      After he threw her that pity bone shout-out yesterday, of course she’d make a beeline straight for the only “high status marker” still willing to acknowledge her — already said as much upthread, but I don’t imagine she was there by virtue of an extended invitation. Her “Startup Voyeurism” comment is so off — if he isn’t in the fauxto, he probably wasn’t in the room, & five minutes alone w/ anyone else’s stuff, she’s bound to start rifling through it.

    • Preach, All the Bralettes! That also annoyed me to no end, no idea why.
      I get keeping books in your office, that makes sense, but in a conference room where people don’t usually go for a contemplative read? That’s just showing off.
      And Donk may have arranged them, but she surely didn’t bring them with her, not her colours (bright), these books.
      Maybe he has the books there to intimidate his underlings, or he’s always late and this is more like a pretentious waiting room 🙂

      • She calls it a conference room, but who knows, it could very well be a multi-purpose room that includes a library section for employees to share — one certainty is that she had plenty of alone time on her hooves in which to cull titles she found uber impressive & then type all that shit out, including descriptions of his “art work”. LOL – he so far hasn’t “liked” either of her posts about his possessions being broadcast to her fans in the ‘stans. Why is that?

        Meanwhile, baby mama Twit was having an “adorable” shower thrown for her around that same time — scheming D0nkey may thought he’d be going & that she could tag along, since she just happened to be in the neighborhood & all …

        • I just glanced at Brit’s facebook and it appears she has purchased premium fans in the ‘stans. Hers actually comment!

          Granted, the comments are along the lines of, “u looks prety,” and “add me freind,” but it’s mimicking an engaged community. Julie needs to step up her game!

          • I had noticed that too, & meant to say! I guess Twit $prung for living, breathing fans, whereas D0nk $crimped & bought mostly bots?

  10. Jfaing myself to add that I think Julie is going to write her whole book during nanowrimo. Because December 1 deadline.

  11. Puspito Vito Oo Nugruho and Telexfree Antofagasta are not earning their keep. Get to sharing, boys! And as for you, Lache-lache Si-lache Banam’ anama, you are ON NOTICE.

  12. Apparently Avocado was in SF yesterday. Obviously wasn’t staying with JABS. He posted about looking for someone to drive to LA with him today. BURN.

    Also, I’m sure that fake convo between two guys talking about dating burner chicks was directed at him. I wonder why she deleted it?

    She’s losing it.

    • Who do you think you are? They are in each other’s lives as friends. She couldn’t have written the 7,234, 394th most e-mailed article in the last 48 hours without help from The Lollipop Guild.

  13. D0nk claims to now be ready for the teachings of Eckhart Tolle …
    Will insane D0nk highlight this in the book she claims to be reading?

    “Once you have identified with some form of negativity, you do not want to let it go, and on a deeply unconscious level, you do not want positive change. It would threaten your identity as a depressed, angry or hard-done by person. You will then ignore, deny or sabotage the positive in your life. This is a common phenomenon.
    It is also insane.”

    Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment

  14. Sheila McClear has a much more interesting piece in Sunday’s NYT and she merely tweeted it. I like her!

    • That was WAY more interesting and richer in detail. It’s also actually fresh, as opposed to the music festivals. Loved it, Sheila.

    • It takes a special kind of butcher to ruin a good piece of meat. Donkey took a very easy topic and hacked away at it until it resembled cat food, bland and unrecognizable. What kind of a pea brained hack takes a silver plated pheasant and describes it as over boiled chicken breast?

      • If it takes 30 interviews, four months and seven drafts to write a disjointed article on a lightweight subject, I’d say one should take a hint that maybe one is not cut out for the job.

    • HERE’S THE THING: After reading Sheila McClear’s NYT’s article, I want to go to there (the Plank), whereas, after reading Julia Allison’s shoddy NYT’s article, all I wanted was to go throw rotten tomatoes at the NYT’s.

      • Srsly. I live in the OMGBay – moved here after the hustle and bustle and staggering humidity of the East Coast left me burned out – and reading these two articles made me want to go running back to the other side of the country

      • i’m hoping for plank outshoots that’s how interesting that story was.

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