Julia Allison Didn’t Think She Was Too Old To Write An Article For Thought Catalog

Dawn Davenport

Julia Allison, of the self-plagiarism is OK Allisons, has self-plagiarized again by republishing an article had her article from the terrible, terrible lady place republished on a site full of those little pieces of shit that need to get off my lawn.


    • Gosh, I love Sam Biddle.

      Hee, hee, Brit is so ridiculous. What’s she going to do on her next TV appearance, announce that putting meat between slices of bread makes it convenient and portable for the gambling table?

    • She’s got to be on some kind of drugs. Nothing else makes sense. But at least no disgustingly filthy used yoga mats were harmed in the making of that segment.

      I have changed my user name in honor of Sam, the hardest working man in the Silicon Valley.

      Signed, the cat-hag formerly known as “My Daddy Blew The Whistle On The U.S. Military Industrial Complex And All I Got Was This Lousy Mesh Shirt.”

    • Well she got 6 million in funding for that plagiarism so I guess she gets to laugh all the way to the bank. I am in the wrong business

    • Whatever happened to the cat lady who did some work for her on spec? Someone around here got burned by that cheap-ass ditz. The part that really baughered my mind is that Brit has to outsource these terrible ideas.

    • I can’t bring myself to watch that, but is she pregnant? If so, makes the Donk-Morin flirtation at the wedding even more vile.

    • I’m sure Brit thinks of what she does not as plagiarizing, per se; more like curating the ideas of other people.

    • Can Gawker Media sue Brit’s ass for all it’s worth?

      I mean, since all the “original” “ideas” came from their site, it seems fair they should get a slice of the profits.

      • Well, to be fair, none of Lifehacker’s ideas are original either. I think the difference here is that it is pretty clear that most of the ideas from the Today show came from Lifehacker given that they were at the very top of the Google results.

    • Man, the peanut gallery over there is on fire.. Brit, are you taking notes?


    • Ugh, someone please fuck with her Wikipedia page:


      Early life and education[edit]

      Morin was born in San Antonio, Texas.[1] She studied business and communications at the University of Texas at Austin.[1] In an era without YouTube tutorials or home economic classes, Brit was “methodical and curious,” reading books and experimenting with trial and error to teach herself everything from sewing to cooking.[1]

      • San Antonio needs to name a street after her or something for bringing such prestige and esteem to their fine city.

      • UGH, please tell me you’re kidding me that Brit Moron even HAS a Wikipedia page. But, you’re not kidding, and I’m going to vom in the shower.

        Honestly, in what way is she notable or famous enough to have a Wikipedia page? Effed Up malt liquor right there.

      • ‘In an era without … home economic classes’

        Oh please. In her lifetime, there has *not* been ‘an era w/out home economics’ taught in jr high school & beyond.

        And how the hell does one experiment with ‘trial & error’?

      • “In an era without …”

        As if she grew up in the 1920s.

    • Omg her video about painting a stool with clear whiteboard paint was just amazingly dumb. You can paint your Tupperware lids with it too, but it has to dry outside overnight because it stinks so bad and maybe that means it is slightly toxic and you shouldn’t be painting food containers with it? She came across as supremely smug and super dumb. Strange combo.

  1. It does say it’s a repub at the bottom. Thought Catalog seems to be on a quest to republish the shittiest shit by the world’s leading thundercunts of late; Penelope Trunk’s article on how all the girls need plastic surgery reared its ugly head there recently as well.

    • Penelope Trunk you say?

      ** voms in shower **

      Is she still with “the Farmer”? who beats her nad ridicules her? But she preaches about female strength and her advice for ALL THE GIRLS?

      (Sorry for the rant, I just hate Penelope as much as I hate Donkey)

  2. Not that I’m defending her, but I’m almost certain this is a case of xoJane having a syndication deal with Thought Catalog. It happens all of the time, and one big clue is that the piece on TC mentions that it was originally published at xoJane. (HuffPo does this, as do a number of other websites. An article about my book project published on Brokelyn was syndicated on Business Insider, e.g.).

    I doubt Juliar had anything to do with this… but, of course, that’s irrelevant. She’s still not someone I come even close to admiring much less tolerating.

    • Your a syndication deal with Thought Catalog! Nevertheless, it’s still a painfully stupid article that was desperate to find a new home, like Julia.

    • I doubt Juliar had anything to do with this…

      Okay, I’ll buy that, as your explanation makes sense.

      But … BUT! she must have had advance notice of the re-publish date, seeing’s she conveniently resurrected her Fans in the ‘Stans just in the nick of time.

      #Transparent D0nkey is transparent. #And dusty.

  3. OT: It’s 69° outside & my A/C has been off for two days, so windows are open …
    (thank you, Greg!) … I keep hearing the d0nkey in the field back yonder & lol’g.

    • I’m jealous. It is 91 degrees out and it hurts to breathe. Where in the world is our Donkey? Chicago?

      • It’s 21-ish° cooler than just 2-3 days ago …
        I am deeply confused!

        Wherever D0nkey is, she’s in an eternal hell of her own creation.

  4. What’s the deal with being obsessed with having a pink bedroom?

    It’s also really telling that she says she doesn’t know what “being yourself” means. That’s really common among narcissists – no stable sense of self or identity.

  5. You know, until right now I didn’t realize Thought Catalog was a real thing. I assumed it was just a clever way of describing the quality of certain writing. Joke’s on me!

  6. Oh my god, I just noticed Lilly on that bed. I can only imagine what happened when that heifer landed.

  7. This essay is even worse than I remembered. Jean Teasdale meets the Cathy cartoon. This thing needs to be introduced into evidence at her commitment hearing.

    • The only thing good about it is your awesome username. But yeah, it is painful to read. Lots of errors too. I don’t get how things are published with errors. I worked at a small academic journal ten years ago and we copy-edited everything with a fine-toothed comb. Now it seems like nobody gives a shit anymore.

  8. What happened to all of her summer travel? I have a strong feeling she went dark for two reasons: 1)The break up of the greatest love of all time and 2) that we call her bullshit with her travel schedule… Her attempt at making people envious goes splat. Narcissist goes dark. She will be back online after the summer with some BS excuse that no one will buy. The city of North Carolina will not be pleased.

  9. As usual, I kant finish her bullshit. Make some sense and cool it with the “uh,” asshole. IT’S NOT CUTE. One thing jumped at me though, was there something about “who is the real myself” in there? If so, I think we have already established two perfectly sufficient answers to that question:

    Self is

    1) stalker


    2) Golem.

    I don’t understand what the problem is here.

  10. I am younger than Julia and I’m still too old to even read Thought Catalog.

      • What did she say was the expired date? 30? If so then no but close!

          • LOL not interested in marriage, but does it count that I’m moving in with my OMGboyfriend in a couple of months? If so then yay I beat the expiration date!

          • Better get him to put a ring on it woman.. The expiration date is looming!

          • OMG oh noes what will happen to me? Julia, please tell me … will I melt if I miss the expiration??????? I need a ring!!!!!!!

          • It’s just not a priority. Maybe someday will change. We don’t want kids either. Maybe if we had kids, we would want to be married in order to be “official” for the kids.

  11. I’m 25 and I stopped reading Thought Catalog years ago, after I realized Gala Darling basically rehashed their shit for her weekly roundup.

  12. I see old Julia is wearing my great grandmother’s nightgown from 1952.

  13. What makes me kind of sad and giggle maniacally all at the same time, is dumb fuck Julia got paid $50 for this article (insert parenthetical to try to meet the word limit while not making any sense) and if that does give them permission to republish this shitshow (I’m talking about the photo) she really got fucked.

    I also have a theory that she’s gone dark for yet another $50 article for xoJane entitled A Curious Girl Goes Dark to Find Her Real Self and Get Back Her Dignity (for $50 OMG).

    • At this point, it’s my life goal to be mentioned in her inevitable “I staged my own e-death and my haters still called me Donkey, see it doesn’t matter what I do, they’re just jealous of my uh something mumble HAPPINESS OH YEAH I’M SOOO HAPPY! {chokesob}” essay.

      (Actually I try not to call her Donkey because I’m a sap and it got to me a little that it was the first thing she mentioned to Annie Lalla on camera. But you make it DAMN HARD sometimes, Julia.)

      • More like “I staged my own e-death and nobody noticed….”.

        Seriously, I think she is going to reinvent herself as a how-to-quit-the -Internet expert.

  14. Meanwhile, Derwood’s Facebook page has him staring contemplatively out into the ocean, chin resting on hand. What could he be thinking? Is he missing her? Pondering his next culinary adventure? Contemplating loss and love? Hoping for Aquaman to make an appearance? It’s a puzzle.

          • I really don’t either – not quite. I think they’re taking on purpose time apart, but Devin hasn’t nevered her yet. Something tells me the social media blackout was an ultimatum not a choice. Maybe Devin told her he couldn’t be with a lying, soul-sucking attention whore any longer, and since she can’t change those things she’ll just remove the evidence.

          • Word!

            I am with Afghani & Cuckoo: I think they are still together and he demanded that she quits all that online BS she was doing.

          • Meh. Those two fakes faked that relationship — the contract wasn’t for ‘in perpetuity throughout the universe’ — hence, the gig is up & the greatest love affair that never even really was sure the hell ain’t ever gonna rekindle.

          • I’m with Brayella, from what Ellsberg dished here I think they are over, especially if Debbie read that shit or was told about it by his friends.

          • Yeah, his relationship with her (or should I say, her relationship with us) pretty much trashed his Google results. Sure, she posted the tinfoil pants dance, but WE made him a star.

    • He’s pondering taking a slowboat to visit Puspito Vito Oo Nugroho and engaging in an ayahuasca ceremony in an Indonesian bathhouse.

  15. I’m waiting for Julia to see this lengthy screed about dating/relationships and chime in:


    “People Love talking about how much they Love San Francisco. But lurking under that fog of adoration is an underground world of women who can’t stand it. It’s hard to articulate: on the surface, this city is everything a woman ought to want, but there’s just something…off. This essay takes a brutally honest look at the social dynamics at play in San Francisco, and seeks to articulate why people who complain about it have a point. Part I: Geeks, explores the ramifications of wealth accumulation by men unpracticed in social graces, and forms the crux of the argument. Parts II and III ook at peripheral characters, familiar from other cities but re-cast by this environment. In Part II, the married and gay men who exacerbate the feeling that one’s options are terrible; in Part III, the alpha males encouraged and allowed to extend college lifestyles in pursuit of “the next big thing.” Finally, in the Postlude, a look at those of us who remain and, in the Call to Action, what we need to do about it.”


    She loves to talk about the SV/SF/tech dating scene… and this “analysis” seems ripe up Julia’s alley… *paging Donkey*.

    • Another lulzy excerpt:

      “Take my day today: I spent the morning with an investor, a 39-year-old, 6’5” former NCAA rower who did social policy research before returning to business school. He’s funny and laid back and has been married for ten years to a gorgeous woman with whom he has two young children and a golden retriever. I then went to lunch with a client, a college rugby player with a goofy grin and great laugh who’d earned three degrees and started two successful companies before the age of 30; we discussed finance reform and his triathalon training and plans for his wedding to his college girlfriend in October. I left the office early to go for a bike ride with a close friend, a 6’2” blond, blue-eyed, perfect bone structured former model, now an investment banking MD who volunteers on the weekends. He’s waiting for California to legalize gay marriage so he can propose to his boyfriend of five years.

      So when people talk about all the things that make San Francisco a great city – the farmer’s markets and top-notch restaurants and hikes and trips to wine country – they fail to mention that the people taking advantage of those experiences are couples and large groups of women [enviously eyeing the couples]. The single men are all at home playing video games.”

      • Honestly. San Francisco is a great and beautiful city filled with all kinds of people, wonderfully. This writer is talking about a very particular slice, Marina sorts, that a lot of people can’t stand. She’s talking about the city sheerly in her own terms of husband-hunting, her own narrow criteria, looking for a rich, educated, eligible guy. Good luck, honey.

        But part of me sympathizes, or at least sees what she means. Women do outnumber men in SF, and the straight men in SF that I have known there are in no hurry to settle down, well into their 30’s often. It’s not a great place for a chick like this seeking a Mr. Perfect to put a ring on it; and she seems highly particular. But it’s still a wonderful place if someone like her just chills out, has some fun, and stop trying so hard to land Mr. Right.

    • I can’t with this bitch, she’s sounds so entitled and has probably never left her neighborhood. Put the blame on ALL THE MEN and not yourself, yeah sounds like a Donkey.

  16. I wonder if Julia may have gotten a job(ish) at xoJane. There’s the (awful) updated bio and (awful) photo on the site, the republishing of Julia’s (godawful) xo piece on Thought Catalog, and the fact that Jane Pratt is known for hiring and adoring self-aggrandizing narcissistic trust fund girls who drive other staffers nuts. And need I point out that lack of writing ability in no way impedes one from being hired as a staff writer on that site?

    I bet Julia showed up on office doorstep while in nyc and begged for job writing “column.” Jane loves dippy new age garbage so I am sure she would have been receptive to whatever omg, whole-new-me, burning-man monologue Jules performed.

    That site is filled with staff writers who turn in like one barely legible piece a week, on an idea-mood they had about self tanner, and half the word count is about how they are a Beauty Writer and omg Beauty Editor and this is their Job and they are Writing and paid to Be Writers. Occasionally they get to whatever resembles a point, four paragraphs down, after the part about how they don’t know how to sort laundry and you can’t tell them whose brother’s cousin’s stepmom not to date, but omg does anyone else think oral sex is like that scene from the Princess Bride but more embarrassing I am a Beauty Writer.

    She would fit right in.

    I wonder whether Jules and Mandy are friends or foes. They similarly became known by relentlessly self-tipping Gawker back in the day.

    Jane lovessss social media but Jules may have told her she was on a break and let’s doan omg announcement launch, instead of just showing up in photo feeds.

    Just a theory.

    • I wondered the same thing. What would they pay? And if I remember, donkey got eviscerated in the comments…would they continue to hire someone nobody likes or respects?

      • My guess (and it is only a mildly informed guess) is that salary for a staff writer who has a following, a recognizable (if widely loathed) name, and an enormous willingness to self promote could be in the $60-$75k range.

        • $40K to $50K maybe. Which would be grossly overpaying her compared to the young ‘uns on staff there.

  17. No where else on Thought Catalog do you see gratuitous, unrelated pictures of the author embedded in the post.

    Like… I know we all know she’s a narcissist. But girl’s a serious freakin narcissist.

    • I’ve always wondered how those conversations go with her publishers. “Here’s about 50 pictures of me you can choose from. And here’s a jpeg of my signature!”

    • Actually, he was singing about the president’s debil wife announcing an award on the Oscars. Who does she think she is?! The First Lady or sumpin’?!

      • Curiosity won out & I googled “debil” (looked like an easyenough typo for “devil”) … huh … TIL.


        • No typo. I was using “debil,” which one might hear as slang spoken by a white or black southern character in a 1930s movie, as indicative of Max-i-Pad’s thought process.

    • I saw that yesterday & meant to link (Julia Allison’s Georgetown plagiarism is even mentioned in the comments!)

      The begging to remove the post because of the death threats that were already happening before the post didn’t make a helluva lot of sense, but I guess that when it comes to scary emails & face punches by imaginary homeless men, one can never be too careful.

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