Donkey Rule: While Doing Any Wintertime Physical Activity, Be Sure To Squeeze Into The Tightest Pants Possible

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Our most recent examples of Donk’s devotion to this rule:

 

comfy1comfy

Past manifestations:

casings

yeastinfection
prettypinktoolbag
cameltoe

And I just had to add this, for old times’s sake. Perhaps he’d seen just far too much Donkey camel-toe that day:

zombie

480 COMMENTS

  1. JP said in the previous post that she looks genuinely happy in the ice skating photos but I think she looks forced as always. And does anyone else think they both look exhausted? Debbie has dark circles under his eyes and she looks puffy to me.

    • She’s literally dressed like a little girl. Hot pink snow boots, a matching hoodie, and hat. She looks awful/embarrassing to me.

    • She was just holding that cookie!! She didn’t eat it!! Sugar should be outlawed!!!!!!

      • her legs are bigger than their bodies

        i have a friend with that body who is a kind hardworking good person and a mom and nobody snarks on her shape because she is an outstanding human being; also she doesn’t wear hooker skirts and pants three sizes too small

          • Hate to say it, but Girl Scout cookies now taste like something from a plastics factory. They’re kind of awful. Samoas I like though, but Greg knows what used-tire rubber factory they were made in. I also don’t like the idea of children making sales calls at strangers’ doors. I know, Debbie Downer here, but isn’t it outmoded? Dunno.

          • Girl Scout cookies are subcontracted to different regional bakeries. You might have moved from a place with a good bakery to one with a bad bakery? They were still as delicious as ever here in Boston when last I could check. Also, the Girl Scouts set up cookie-selling tables in the subway stations, which is fantastic.

          • Hi Albie, it’s not a matter of me moving, Girl Scouts USA contract with giant foodstuff producers for their waxen cookies. Cost-cutting over the years, cheaper-to-produce cookies seems to be the thing. Glad yours are delicious still though.

          • Different (large) bakeries for each multistate region, not mom ‘n’ pop shops. It used to be three or four; now it seems to be two.

            In Mass., we have ABC Bakers, which are pretty reliable (but don’t have Samoas—instead they do “Caramel Delites” which I have never had). Little Brownie Bakers is the current “other” baker.

          • When I was a Girl Scout there were a lot more bakeries—six, apparently—and my cousins and I used to trade because the Massachusetts Thin Mints were better but the New Hampshire Lemon Chip were better than the Massachusetts Lemon Creme. Looking at this elaborate timeline my guess is that we had FFV and they had Burry-LU.

          • I did door to door sales when I was a Girl Scout a few moons ago, but since that time the Scouts have nixed this method and instead the Scouts set up a table outside of a supermarket or what have you and do group sales. They definitely don’t allow door to door anymore.

      • Oh silly Jacy, you know she was just demonstrating that she was about to throw that Girl Scout cookie in the trash with the rest of Cindy McCain’s supply.

    • Wow. How long did they last after this? Reading her comments is genuinely disturbing. I LOVE TO SHARE.

    • I meant it – at the time

      Oh D0nkey …

      Maybe Mulia Mallison’s calves are so freakishly ginormous due to all the back-pedaling she does?

    • That was then …
      RE: FLAPJACK
      I’ve never dated anyone so unflappable

      This is now …
      RE: DICKLESS
      I’ve never date anyone so unfappable

    • my haters have an unpleasant habit of trying to contact the guy, etc. Jack would – and has – laughed at things like that

      Yo, Julia Allison! C’mon, we know you like to share — so tell us how hard Jack McCain laughed about you & Christine Kelly contacting some innocent, under the the false pretense of being his lawyer, to threaten their livelihood?

      • and some of the responses….”Awwww Congrats! It’s amazing that he said it less than six months in. That *never* happens to me 🙁 You must have completely swept him off his feet! What’s your secret?”

        vom.

    • I just got sucked into her blog and comments and I am SO sad I wasn’t around back then. I think I saw my first “feel free to relax” in the comments section of one post. She is so, so awful.

      • Read the ones after she announces they have broken up. So hilarious in hindsight, both the post and her comments, because there are just SO MANY lies. Cuckoobird got dumped because Pancakes got sick of her snooping into his email and phone, and because she was a rude, lousy, lazy house guest in the “home they shared.” Which in fact was his mother’s condo, not the “home they shared” at all. And he had to buy her the boxes to get her to leave. Oh Donkey.

        • I forgot that he had to go buy her the boxes. How mortifying! It was so weird how she stayed around for a few days after Pancakes dumped her. Didn’t Cindy and Yimmy come to Coronado finally to ensure she got to the airport and left? So, so humiliating. But of course she doesn’t realize that at all.

          • YES. She wrote about how they were all having one last glass of wine together. It was so obvious that they were drinking to deal with her braying as she was being drug out the door by her hind legs.

          • Cindy McCain personally seeing to it that Donkey was put on a livestock cargo plane the hell out of the state and away from her family is a scorching soap opera drama I treasure and can replay in my mind for comedy again and again. If this makes me awful, so be it.

        • http://julia.nonsociety.com/post/5288792171

          “What Jack wants for his career is an intensive, difficult path that would make it almost impossible / incredibly difficult to have a family in the next 5 years – and I really want that … if I were 25, trust me, I would never, ever give him up.”

          Except…he’s the one getting married now. Um, er, oops?

        • It makes me laugh now knowing that – as a short term house guest, she actually brought enough stuff that BOXES were required to move it out.

          ps. did she write a post about how he called her and asked her to “move in”? wonder what he thought when that went up?

          • I heard it was something like: “We should spend actual time in each other’s company so that we can get to know one another and see if this is going anywhere. Why don’t you come stay with me in San Diego for a couple of weeks while I’m doing training?”

            OMG HE ASKED ME TO MOVE IN WITH HIM.

          • While on a Volvo factory tour, Mom$er heard it was something like: “You should dump your dog in my care so she can get some serious potty training for a couple of weeks.”

      • She has not given him up. His happiness/pending marriage/almost restraining order distance from her torments her daily. She can manically tweet of happiness, positivity but we all know she’s just trying to convince herself that she can be happy. And in some smallllll (the only small thing on her) way she hopes, believes/receives, has made love potions, fashioned voodoo dolls of fiancee for tragic and humilating death that he will come back to her on a pink cotton candy scented pony waiving sparklers in the air wearing her engagement ring round his neck. WHEN is this wedding of his so we can truly watch the final end to this tragic act?

        • It’s in June. Believe me: you’ll know when the date draws nigh.

          Her ZOMG sexually delicious travels in May are a cover for not being invited. She simply CAHN’T travel again so soon, bunnies. SO sad to miss her Jackie’s big day, much as he was dying to have her there. Still besties! So blessed! The bride is just a jellus h8or!

          • Oh, man, I’ve gone down the NonSociety rabbit hole here – the immediately post-Pancakes era was great. I just got to the part where she asks readers for tips on…wait for it…Morocco! How’d that one turn out?

        • Again — so many lies. She says she broke up with Taylor in November, before she met Pancakes, but there were pictures of her dry-humping Taylor in December, wearing Christmas plaid and also dry-humping a stone lion in a Chinese restaurant. Because she is so classy.

          • She loves him like she loves Megan Asha.

            When is the last time she mentioned that sister?

            Right.

    • Classic. And she actually says in replies, “I meant it- at the time.”

      Girl has more Internet baggage than an airport.

      • Ha! Except … go to Ski Apache (Ruidoso, NM) for the the weekend of April 12th – 15th … Mexicans on skis for as far as you can see, because they know all the Murricans are at home doing last-minute income tax filing, & it’s only a three-hour drive from Ciudad Juarez.

        • YES, Brayella! I am from El Paso…so I know of what you speak. Gotta love Ski Apache.

    • Seriously. She’s going to get “honeymoon cystitis,” and it’s not going to be from Debbie’s micropeen.

      • Is it possible for his micropeen to even get smaller? Someone mentioned that Devil is looking thinner and I didn’t notice it really until this picture. Wow, I’m guessing it’s like two dogs eating at their house. She pushes him out of the way to finish what’s in his bowl on the floor. You’re WELcome for the visual.

  2. That first photo. Honey. I am vain enough to know that I would never put a photo of myself like that in the internet. Mostly because I wouldn’t wear pants that fit me like that or make me look like that, and I consider my legs among my assets.

    • The ones that kill me are the ski pants with the blue jacket. It’s like she squeezed herself into a six-year-old’s ski pants. How was she even able to move? What a ridiculous tool.

  3. Ski pants are all that fit me right now.

    She LITERALLY can’t wear pants.

  4. As of Thursday, Lewis Howes – the only person Debbie Stetler is subscribed to on Facebook – was also in Heavenly. Could it be a grifter gathering?

  5. lost a grandmother but gained a boyfriend (fucktard fashion failure (testicle dust that dissipated into the wind (Queen Neferteeri)))

    The Return of the FUPAjabba!

  6. lost a grandmother but gained a boyfriend (fucktard fashion failure (testicle dust that dissipated into the wind (Queen Neferteeri)))

    [img]http://cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/2010/01/custom_1262792781599_haroldjulia.jpg[/img]

    Before she starting Frankensteining her face, and before she trashed the man’s political career.

    • Said the woman who’s never gotten off the bunny slope and has manufactured photos of herself “skiing”:

      “Then we got there – and … he couldn’t ski. Not sort of couldn’t ski, but god awful, I-hope-he-doesn’t-break-his-leg couldn’t ski.

      Out there on the slopes, he wasn’t a hotshot politician, he was just a guy. A guy with no coordination. Later, watching C-Span together (although I’d really rather watch Oprah), he got the Kuwaiti ambassador’s name wrong – and I corrected him! Suddenly, I began to see beyond the image to the real person, who wasn’t so intimidating after all.”

        • Harold Ford, Jr. He seems to have recovered as a talking head on the news shows these days. And is remarried I think.

          • Harold Ford Jr. is absolutely the worst, dumbest huckster out there on the Sunday shows, a nominal Democrat who touts GOP talking points constantly, he’s a paid shill with multiple shady/obscure “consultancies” where he makes his bank. He’s dumb and venal and out for himself, and the Beltway loves him for slamming Obama at ever chance, because, “even an African-American Dem says.!” He is the worst.

      • How could she possibly know the name of the Kuwaiti ambassador? Did she used to make outcalls to the Embassy?

        • “Outcalls,” haha! I’ve heard those oil rich Kuwaiti guys pay big bucks to do unspeakable filthy things to hot young caucasian girls. Nik Richie on TheDirty.com calls them “port-a-potties.” 🙂

        • Julia knows/knew dick all about Kuwait and ambassadors. She was in her “Washington insider/hot girl” mode. At the time she was getting noticed in the Washington talk of the town press because of her Sex on the Hill (plagiarism) notoriety and thought she was hot shit. Julia was also cozying up to awful lloyd Grove, who wrote the WP’s Reliable Source. Concurrently, she was riding the Washngtonienne schtick which briefly had tongues wagging at the time. And this was at the height of Chandra Levy speculation. No doubt Jula was also taking a page from Monica Lewinsky, whose leap to the spotlight must have made an impact on high school Julai Baugher. It was a gross time with gross girls sexing up Washington media.

          • I guess what I wanted to say was Julia DESPERATELY wanted to be part of scandal because she saw that as a fast track to fame.
            Also, Julia has never believed in fact-checking and certainly knew no one was going to quiz her on where Kuwait is or who the ambassador was. She was throwing that vacuous catch phrase shit around from beginning. he terms just change from city to city and for whatever guise sheis pretending to be. Right now it’s grifter affirmations. Next year after the inevitable impasse and flame out with that crowd it will be something else.

          • I’d also add that Julia’s shtick was particularly appalling, and maybe was a part of the coloring, in lightnof that dreadful time in DC. The city was still reeling from 9/11 – people forget we lost lives here – and there were barricades and security everywhere and Bush was president and the Beltway snipers fueled the fug. It was the baby days of blogs and the dishy bloggers were getting noticed and deals (though I don’t think late adopter Julia was blogging at the time). The WP had recently made an ill fated merger with AOl and all things Internet were new frontier – Julia was able to sex her way into the chatter. She had her youth and looks, which in Washington scale, were alright at the time. And a kind of dumb pluck and the ability to worm her way into the right place at the right time and absolutely no integrity. I’ve wondered if Julia would have been a different animal had she not come to Georgetown and remained in the Midwest. he’d probably be pulling the same shit on a smaller scale in New Trier Township, but I get the feeling they don’t want her either.

  7. So cute that she discovered jeggings three years after they became popular. That cheesy grin on her face is because she’s totally infatuated with how skinny she thinks she looks LOL!

  8. Ugh, that first photo is basically her faux yoga on ice. She’s not skating there she’s just hoisting her hind leg up like the fondant tool she is. The braygies, they burn!

      • That second fautxo makes them look like a couple of patients in Awakenings after the L-Dopa stopped working. I have to go get booze now. THANKS DONKEY.

      • I was actually just thinking that she needs to double-tie her laces, I have to do that all the time with Converse shoes..

    • before this site i never would have suspected that there existed a person so detached from reality as to do that, but, look and see

      • OMG, it really DOES look like she’s just standing there posing, pretending to be skating but actually not. That first photo is ridonkulous in the extreme. I noticed the people in the background are looking in her direction. I thought it must have been because she was gliding back and forth like that over and over so Debbie could take multiple photos, but I think Sake B. is right and she’s just standing there, faking it like always.

        And “stroke face” made me lol! It’s very derp derp. Also, Debbie is so thin and ragged looking. Combined with how out of it he seemed in the FW videos, I’m thinking alcoholic or some other chemical dependency? Whatever. They’re weird and creepy. Just imagine the braying echoing off the ice and the other poor skaters who had to put up with them.

        • Most grifters subscribe to the “Fake it, until you make it” ethos. So this makes perfect sense.

        • Oh, and yes.. It does looks like she’s standing there posing, and not moving. Everything in the background is in focus.

          She’s a fucking idiot and thought it would be cute, and people would adore it and “like” it on Facebook.

          Is she still purchasing “likes” from the fans in the ‘Stans?

          • Her body is headed to the left, her left foot is pointing to the right – had she actually been moving they would have pointed in the same direction. She is definitely standing still and just balancing on one skate.

    • fauxga on ice, with ice capades ken doll!

      [img]http://www.manbehindthedoll.com/images/icecapades.jpg[/img]

    • Add to that the fact that the place in the background that looks like some charming resort… is a shopping center/outlet mall. She is ice skating at the mall.

  9. ***Dateline, TAHOE***

    Hey guys, it’s me! I’m still on a birthday high 😉 after a magical morning of spinning in circles (on an ice rink!) here in Tahoe. My boyfriend insisted on bringing a camera to make sure he could take plenty of pictures of me. How I love that man. He truly is an amazing boyfriend. Amazing. Boyfriend. Boyfriend. Sometimes when I’m on a birthday high I just like the sound of certain words. Who am I kidding, other times too! ☺

    It goes without saying that a 32nd birthday is a momentous occasion in any young girl’s life, and deserves a real celebration. So my boyfriend and I decided to spend our first day in the natural beauty of Tahoe shuttered in our fifth floor non-lake view hotel room to watch motivational videos on an iPad. It was AMAZING. By 2 a.m. we had eaten several bags of gluten free Doritos (that my boyfriend lovingly prepared for me by placing in a warmed bowl with a sprig of parsley on top!) and watched 58 TED Talks submitted by our incredible circle of overachieving friends—some of whom work for multiple consecutive weeks in any given year.

    My new favorite TED Talk is The Secret. My boyfriend and I see the $8,000/month SF apartment happening, so it’s pretty much in the bag! We also see forthcoming fame and fortune through unspecified, biennial, non-resume based projects (why don’t more people do this?!), so that is probably happening too! I didn’t tell my boyfriend this part, but I also see him asking me in the next 30 days to marry him. I didn’t want to overextend The Secret by visualizing total checklist compliance, but it’s still pretty exciting!

    This past year has been amazing for me, filled with personal growth and introflection. As they say, when one door closes, it’s time to move to a new city, and I am SF bound. My boyfriend recently introduced me to the work of an amazing SF-based author named Timothy Leary, whose moving and beautiful words appear to have been written just for me: “If you don’t like what you’re doing, you can always pick up your needle and move to another groove.” Sing it, TL! This curious girl in a perplexing world is going to keep moving to a new groove every third week to keep things interesting.

    I’m signing off now. My man (and soon to be James Beard Award Winning chef! ☺) is making me dinner with artisanal ingredients hand-picked from the Safeway down the street. I am truly blessed. Love and light in the Julia New Year.
    -TAHOE

  10. Sounds like someone had a ski hill tantrum. Maybe because her pants were too tight.

    Such an adult.

    “Today was not my best ski attitude.” — at Heavenly Boulder Lodge.

  11. I was trying to put my finger on it and it just came to me, there’s something very In Cold Blood about Debbie…

  12. picture 1: even the little girl in the background is giving JA a side-eye.
    picture 2: what little hotness debbie ever had is G-O-N-E. and he is skinny like skeletor now.

  13. Listened to that radio show again. Hilarious how Covino’s then-girlfriend, now-wife smacked the donkey down and, when she couldn’t compete, she started sucking up to her.

    “I’m not random!”

    JA was so in over her head, and yet still thought she was better than everyone on the show. Look at Layla: http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BOTc2Mzg3NzUwOV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTIwMDE3OA@@._V1._SX214_CR0,0,214,314_.jpg

    Sure, you’re just as hot, donks: https://rebloggingdonk.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Julia+Allison+Season+Premiere+Viewing+Party+ESJaPm-Milhl.jpg

  14. In 2001 all things Internet had been happening for a long time
    01 was when stupid people started to play

      • yeah, anytime

        also: politics is show business for ugly people, and dc is where all the class presidents in every high school go when they graduate from college

  15. So Birthcray is over and now she foes back to LA and Debbie to San Francisco. What now? I love it when she runs out of distractions temporarily (fashion week, valentines day, birthday…). I guess the next big thing will be moving and that wedding in Spain in May? When is Burnng Man?

      • This is probably it. She’s been reading here how Devin has been registering “Julia Stetler” domain names and probably thought Valentines day he’d put a ring on it.. That passed, so then she thought for sure it would have to be her birthday.. That too passed. Poor girl is going to lose her mind soon if he doesn’t find a way to buy a CZ for her..

    • Oh she’ll have another Bold Academy breakthrough, have five fake jobs, still avoid ever writing a resume (spin/spin/sugar), and then hotcake’s (or hautecakes) wedding. I for one, was not here during the pancake days and cannot fully express how excited I am to watch the final thud before she fades off the face of the earth. What’s the over/under on she gets engaged (for the day) on the day of JM’s actual wedding day?

  16. I was catching up on Portlandia yesterday and thought of Julia when Chloe Sevigny’s character Alexandra gets called out as a “Cultural Tease.” Amanda dresses up like Jean Seberg ala Breathless in Breton stripes and pixie cut and Siouxsie Sioux (Suxy Suxy) and Carrie says “she’s a cultural tease… When someone looks a certain way I just ascribe all of this knowledge to them.” Amanda doesn’t know who these people are but adopts their “look.”
    That’s so Julia in glasses at the grifter house seminar, at FW with the obsolete mic flag, twittering The Altlantic cover stories without even reading, playing house with Jack, and, as I was reminded this morning, Sex on the Hill with the married (OMG AfricanAmerican) congressman. Julia is a relentless poseur.

      • The only thing she wants is to be a political wive-it would afford her a life of successful grifting behind the guise of philanthropy. It’s strike two for her there, correct?

    • LOL — SHADES OF D0NKEY EVERYWHERE! I’m watching Shameless, season 5, episode 8: The family started taking in holiday tenants (because they’re broke; so AirBNB d0nkey-ish of them, eh?) & the first tenants are a girl who thinks she’s hot shit, + her silent little brother …

      BRANDY: “I can’t eat any of this stuff. I don’t eat dairy & I’ve got an allergy to gluten.”
      DEBBIE: “It didn’t seem to bother you yesterday.”
      BRANDY: ::bristles:: “You’ve got a lot of anger, Debbie. I’m going to pray for you.”
      DEBBIE: ::rolls eyes:: “Your parents must have paid a fortune for this. Shouldn’t you be going to museums & galleries?”
      BRANDY: “I can look all that stuff up on the net.”

  17. Just delurking for a sec to drop this bit…it is to chortle.

    Via LinkedIn, may I present Lord and Lady Shilldebeast:
    Chef D
    Devin Stetler
    December 2012 – Present (4 months) Your Home

    Entrepreneur in Technology
    Devin Stetler
    January 2012 – Present (1 year 3 months) Los Angeles, CA

    Resident Chef
    Bold Academy
    Educational Institution; 1-10 employees; Education Management industry
    February 2013 – February 2013 (1 month) San Francisco, CA

    Front End Lead
    310 Labs/ Lifecrowd.com
    May 2010 – December 2011 (1 year 8 months) Santa Monica, CA

    AND

    CEO
    JuliaAllison.com
    2012 – 2012 (less than a year)

    columnist
    ELLE Magazine
    Privately Held; 201-500 employees; Publishing industry
    October 2011 – August 2012 (11 months)

    on-air personality
    Bravo TV
    Entertainment industry
    September 2011 – August 2012 (1 year)

    on-air correspondent (fashion)
    NBC New York NonStop
    2009 – 2011 (2 years)

    I cover New York Fashion Week twice yearly
    Also co-hosted over 100 episodes of TMIweekly, a lifestyle talk show which appeared on the channel daily

    co-founder
    NonSociety
    Online Media industry
    2008 – 2011 (3 years)

    SHE IS CEO OF A WEBSIGHT/CITE/SITE?

    • If I didn’t see it with my own eyes, I’d think this was a Cat Lady hoax:

      [img]http://i47.tinypic.com/am2n8n.png[/img]

      • Devin Stetler is just a JackAss of all trades, eh?
        [img]http://i49.tinypic.com/2mqwcae.png[/img]

        • And, I’m not sure knowing how to turn on the tv via remote control counts as “engineering” And just how does that make him now qualified to call himself chef? That’s a leap even for Grifter U Grads.

        • That picture is so fucking stupid. It looks like one of the phony paper pics you get when you buy a cheesy frame at Target. He’s such a tool.

        • Wait, they’re sporting sombreros & packing heat? Is this payback time for the eight years he spent trying to learn how to cook crab? Not sure what I’m looking at, but I like it.

      • I also thought this was a sick catlady joke. I CANNOT BUHLEE this tool seriously put on his crocs and his chef hat and bam instant chef.

        As I said earlier about something else (but similar), this is too Donkey to be true.

        • Ostensibly, if Chef Gurl-R-Dee aka Chef D aka Devin Stetler was a chef of healing cuisine, he could cure Julia Allison of her fake Ceiling Cat Disease … & who knows, these shaman grifters aren’t above any snake oil scam.

    • I’ve only been following this shitshow since 2010, and she NYNS was already over by that time.

      Also, I like how she stretched her Elle gig from the moment filming began – prior to her being hired, of course – through the final column. Even though her actual tenure of publication was actually like two months. That also contradicts her story that the Elle column was the result of her hard work and good name, and not arranged for her by Bravo producers.

      Crazy bitch.

  18. From FB:

    Julia Allison
    47 minutes ago near Kingsbury, NV
    Pre-skating coffee post birthday with my new pink Kate Spade crown hat thanks to AAndre Vaseghi — with Devin Stetler and Andre Vaseghi.

    Andre who?

    Apparently, a Baltimoron.

    From http://ainsleyagency.com/category/press/

    In addition to the new name, Ainsley & Co. also announced two new hires: Andre Vaseghi and Sarah Gelband.

    Andre Vaseghi, Creative Director, has led award winning design & advertising campaigns for agencies from Madison Avenue to Beacon Hill. A former Yale design mentor and active rower, Andre brings with him a client portfolio ranging from New York Fashion Week clientele to star of Bravo’s reality show “Miss Advised,” Julia Allison. Andre Vaseghi carries undergraduate degrees from The Boston Architectural College and Stevenson University as well as a Graduate Degree from George Mason University.

      • Isn’t this the guy who designed her press kit? Probably did it for free? I remember her crowd sourcing for it.

    • “Andre Bean”, he’s the guy who made her a new portfolio or whatever (I’m sure she never paid for it, and it never saw the light of day), and was sucking up to her on twitter all last year.

    • As a “Baltimoron” with tons of advertising experience and a recent MFA in graphic design currently seeking full-time work in my city with “new media agencies” and the like, this information gives me the shudders and is very discouraging.

      • J&TP,

        Not everyone who lives in Baltimore qualifies. You certainly don’t – I’ve enjoyed your witty posts for ages.

        However, if you bring a donkey along as part of your client portfolio, “Baltimoron” applies.

        • Oh, I didn’t object to “Baltimoron” at all, I kinda like it. No worries with me. ‘D throw the term around myself but I’d probably get cut.

          What freaks me out is that I’ve been struggling to find full time work in Baltimore (freelancing ain’t cutting it and adjunct teaching has lost its allure) and its such a fucking small pool there now in terms of ad agencies and its discouraging there’s Donkey taint in it. Anyways, I checked their site – they are hiring but on the account side and videographer which I’m not interested in (but could do). Also, they seem very whitebread and are in bros-town Canton so we probably wouldn’t get along. Yang, I’m really trying to avoid commuting to DC for work!

          • I work in DC now, I take the MARC down every day from Camden Yards at a way-too-early hour. I have a similar dilemma to you, I had to commute to DC if I wanted a really good job.

            Your remark about Canton is very true, which hits close to home because, yeah, I spend a fair amount of time there. There is a very large digital media agency in the Can Company Building on Boston Street. I don’t know if that interests you?

          • Also … since the demise of Eisner … agencies in Baltimore suck … go client side!!!

          • @prom party, thanks for the lead. Eisner blew up right as I moved there; I just kinda assumed I’d get a job there, especially since my former employer was their client. I ended up going to grad school, which was good I guess That said, from the stories I’ve heard, it sounded pretty miserable there. One thing that is driving me crazy is now most of the ad agencies are in the burbs – Hunt Valley, Timonium- or in Canton, where I’d have to take a bus to bros-ville.
            thanks for the ASG lead – one of my bigger clients has been a NYC- based developer, though I’ve primarily been writing for them. I’m glad architecture and development is picking up in
            Baltimore after the Streuver blow up.
            We should have a RBD meet-up in Balty this spring! I could host and Afghani can evaluate my caulk and window treatments!

          • Yes, yes! I breifly worked for Havas’ Euro RSCG downtown…proly right before you got in to town…WHORIFFIC and swore off agencies for the rest of my life. Planning big parties at the new UB Law building opening in the spring. You all should come…it’s gonna be sooooo awesome…

          • I love the new Law Building! I’m so glad UB opened up to an international architect rather than the usual local suspects. And construction has stayed on schedule! I especially like seeing it lit up at night. The building is kinda divisive in my hood but I much prefer it to the usual brick and aluminum siding shit. I have to hand it to UB they are really transforming my hood for the better with forward looking archutecture and what they’ve done with the LAP building, former Mason’s/bank is lovely (although the studentsbare rapidly crapping it up).
            As a former student at UB hopefully I’ll get to one of those parties!

          • @Jordache, aren’t you right near one of the Circulator routes? You could probably take that to Federal Hill, Fells Point, Harbor East, or Canton.

            I bike from Canton to Camden Yards every morning, along the water, it’s not too bad if you go early enough. In a couple of years there will be a subway/light rail line from right near you (Charles Center) over to Canton.

            I suggest if we do a meet up we do it up by Jordache, there are good bars in that area (relatively few douchebros, which is a problem near me).

          • Love the design of UB Law…had a tour with our German partner last week! The first party open to the public will be on April 18th but I don’t think construction (especially furniture installation) will be 100% done. We are planning a party in May with Whiting Turner which will be the best party, IMHO, with more student demonstrations on how the facilities will be used. Living in Federal Hill…I’ve made an art of avoiding lame sports bars that make me feel old…love going up to Jordache’s part of town!

          • Yeah I’m not a sports bar type, maybe we can meet at Brewers or Club Charles or Liam’s or Wind Up, that’s more my scene. I’m out of town until early April (just in DC and later NC but have no desire to make day trips back to Balty, I’ll like it better in the Spring)
            Again I am so excited about the law building. Non-Baltimoron cat-people, its really striking and spectacular! My only concern, and this is me being me, is how they are going to furnish the place. I hope your firm is making the decisions not the UB people. The LAP building is fantastic but the furniture is very late 80s bad. Afghani got his caulk, I got me furniture…

          • Oh and @afghani I don’t mean to knock Canton – I actually haven’t been there in at least two years – its very nice – and like to joke about bros. You know provincial us Baltimorons can be. I do hope the Red Line happens – so my neighborhood is better connected to Canton – but the NIMBYS are hell bent against it. I go through the same kind of backwards shit in my neighborhood being on the board of the MV Parks – we’ve raised millions for the much needed restoration and
            Conservancy (the top landscape architecture firm in the US, Olin, will be doing the work – they also did Bryant Park) but Baltimorons are adverse to change even when it’s good.

    • Two morons padding each other’s resumes. Did he leave off where he attended Bold Academy? And that he made his dossier after the out of touch reality board?

      • You raise a good point here. Graduating from Bold Academy would definitely trump any college degree I would think.

        But then, after 20 15 years of tech engineering, he is now a “chef.” And he probably won’t need it to become the head chef in an SF 5-star restaurant.

  19. Isn’t it just a “new media ad agency”? What would they do for her anyway? At this point, she literally has no product out there. Not even a blog! What would they possibly advertise?

    • In AH’s very slight defense(because she otherwise annoys the shit out of me), at least she has actual talent, works hard for her successful career, and doesn’t seem to obsess over having a man around to have built a good life for herself.

      But other than those key dissimilarities, yes, the two share a near equal amount of annoyingly self-obsessed and awkwardly non-humorous-attempts-to-be-humorous behavior.

      • I agree. She totally has talent; tons and tons of talent, and she works her ass off. I loved her until this awards season, but her acceptance speeches were uniformly awful and uber-rehearsed, she lost her shit because Amanda BugEyes was wearing a similar dress, she acted like Donkey backstage, and now I am kind of hating her.

    • I love her. I don’t understand the hate, and I feel so bad for her that the fact that she has “haters” is her “thing.”

      • I was indifferent until that video. The beginning reminds me of Donk’s “pertheption and prethentation” video. Just sooooo pretentious and cloying there.

        • See, I think it was a case of her checking herself too much out of crippling fear of what the internet was going to say, and being too self-aware forces her to fuck up her moment. I mean, she won a fricking Oscar, and of course she wanted one ,and she just wanted to be happy about it, but she was too paranoid to be actually happy about it, but she could barely contain it, so she comes across as an asshole, a beautiful, talented, fabulous asshole.

          • Minus the beautiful, talented, fabulous and self-aware part. That’s subtraction, but I wouldn’t expect you to understand because you’re a girl.

          • Not sure about the self-awareness part. You can’t be self-aware and then go backstage and behave like that or say that stupid shit. But I do have faith that she’s far smarter than a Donkey, and will figure this shit out and become more likeable.

      • Me too. It’s so strange and ridiculous. And it has gotten so, so far out of hand. If I was her I would start to wonder if there was really something wrong with me! Poor Anne….

        • I will defend Ann Hathaway until my dying day, as I will that terrible lyricist Madonna.

          • She’ll pull out of it, I’m sure. I actually think she’s been hurt by the contrast to Jennifer Lawrence, who just seems so genuine and down-to-Earth and unrehearsed by comparison. She’s like the anti-Hathaway.

          • I can see that. I also think Silver Linings Playbook sucked so much ass, and I don’t understand how it warranted Jennifer Lawrence an Oscar.

          • Naomi Watts was robbed, if you ask me. Also, don’t know if you’ve seen Smashed, but it was really good, and the lead actress in that should have been nominated and would have deserved to win.

            I liked SLP but that’s probably because there are a lot of bipolar people in my sphere and I thought they portrayed it really well. And I thought both she and BCoop were good.

          • For me, in SLP the characters were yelling too much at the beginning, and I tuned it out and stopped really paying attention and then I got to the end and didn’t understand why they were dancing. The Impossible was nearly impossible to watch because it was so heartbreaking. I barely noticed dreamboat Ewan McGregor with his shirt off.

          • Seriously. I cried from the moment they got to the resort until the credits started rolling.

          • Eh, Naomi Watts will get her comeuppance next year with that Last Days of Lady Di film – I’m sure the Academy will be all up into that. I really want to see Smashed, Mary Elizabeth WinstEad is supposed to be transcendent in that – she’s been pretty blank in everything else I’ve seen her in so m glad she got the material to show her chops.

    • I have worked with her a few times and I never had the slightest problem with her. Professional, smart, very comfortable speaking to people, well-read – an absolute pleasure to deal with.

      I think she might not be great in front of large crowds and God knows her Oscars hosting was awful, but I put that down to the material and the fact that James Fucking Franco smoked a huge fattie before the curtain went up.

      • For the purposes of clarification, “smoked a huge fattie” means “smoked pot” as opposed to “performed an act of oral sex on Phillip Seymour Hoffman.”

          • Who knew?

            Anyway, with you on defending Anne. She’s getting backlash now because she’s been so good so long no one believes it anymore.

          • Nah, I think it’s more that she delivers really insincere and hammy acceptance speeches. I don’t think anyone questions her talent.

          • I’m just kidding. Phillip Seymour Hoffman skeeves me out almost as much as Paul Giamatti. Creepy child molester vibe from both of them.

          • @Jacy

            I meant that she’s been the “good girl” of Hollywood for a long time. She started her career when Lindsay Lohan was still thought of as an actress and when Paris Hilton was still, for some reason, famous. She’s had some odd personal episodes (slimy Vatican-cheating boyfriend, anyone?) but I think has until recently kept her nose clean in terms of how she expresses herself and interacts with other professionals and the public. First World Problems for sure, but it can’t be easy.

          • @JP

            Um, I , uh, hate to say it, but I actually really like Phillip Seymour Hoffman as an actor. Good Director too.

  20. Can I check, have we discussed the taking photographs of little girls in airports situation? When I saw that I got the major catlady stabbies – as a single parent to a little girl, if I caught anyone randomly taking pics of my daughter I would go BALLISTIC. And I’m a very laid back chilled out person. But to me, that is so very fucking not ok. I am fiercely private though so maybe I’m a bit touchy about it. What do my fellow catladies feel about it?

    • Tots with you there. Childless, but so fiercely private that the idea of Facebook or Twitter sounds completely absurd to me.

      I take it Donkster took and put up a pic of a random little girl? I guess now that Debbums is there she no longer has to crack that AWESOMELY HILARIOUS joke that consists of posting a pic of herself and someone’s little son captioned “me and my new boyfrannnnn 😉 😉 🙂 :)” Pretty sure she did it about eighteen times. So fun and perfectly appropriate.

      • With you all on this one. I don’t have children but two nephews and would never ever post a picture of them anywhere. When I did have a fb account I’d even ask my sister if it was ok to quote something funny they said or did (and never used their names). Donk has no boundaries so it seems consistent with who she is and what she does.

        • I have never posted a photo of my genetic children (though their dads post millions of them) or my goddaughters or my nephew, even though they are all beyond adorable. Sometimes I say things like “my nephew loves Minecraft” or “my Littlest Goddaughter hates broccoli” but I wouldn’t even use their names.

    • Not okay. At all, end of story. If a stranger ever took a picture of my kitten without asking I would be extremely disturbed and upset. There are too many creepers out there who do godawful things with even seemingly innoncent pictures of children. It is really unacceptable.

        • I feel the same (though I don’t have children yet). Child molesters get material from content shared on social media.

          • that, and also nobody has the right to do that, period so someone who tries to can just fuck off

      • I worked with kids every summer and unless you were given express permission from parents it was a huge NO-NO to post pics of kids online. One reason, was sometimes there are custody issues at play and estranged/abusive family members who are not supposed to know where the children are living.

        It’s just a big privacy breach and when you’re dealing with kids, it’s just never okay.

    • Phew, not just me that was greatly horrified by that then! I’m just aware that sometimes half the fun of Donkey is finding something new to dissects just for the lols, but when I saw that little girl’s photo I got serious Carrie-esque stabbies! 🙂

      In other news, shit’s gone down this weekend, I can feel it in my cat bones, she’s very quiet, the quietness says a million words lol. Imagine if Randi was there this year?! We’d have been INUNDATED with photos of them in their shitty dresses!

  21. So Debbie wants to be a chef-for-hire. I wonder if Donk and he knows what this means. I have friends who were personal chefs for celebrities and 1%ers and there is a whole lifestyle that goes with it. Meaning, you often live on site or move nearby, you work your ass off for long hours and are 100% at the whim of your employer. My friends who did this were both graduates of the CIA and now own their own restaurant. Debbie has NO culinary school credentials, very little experience and no prestige so he won’t make much money at all, certainly not enough to contribute equally to an OMG 4 BR home in San Francisco. He will be spending a LOT of time away from Donkey and if he’s hired by a couple on a regular basis he can kiss away his whims of traveling the world. If he thinks he can make a living by catering grifter events he is going to experience some serious reality check very soon.

    Both of them are just so unrealistic it isn’t even funny. You can’t coast on such meager credentials and expect anything more than meager results.

  22. “Debbie has NO culinary school credentials, very little experience …”

    But he’s watched lots and lots of shows on The Food Network, though.. and he also bought a set of plastic Crocs, just like Mario Batali. How can he possibly not be qualified?

  23. I know Donkey is a total Founder whore and all but I can’t help but wonder why she wants to live in SF all of a sudden so badly…then I realized that Jack McCain was here recently (probably to meet his fiance’s fam) and have a strange feeling they might settle in SF as well and Donkey caught wind. Donkspiracy theories.

  24. Uh oh. Cinderfella has failed to create sufficient birthcray excitement for his pretty princess. Checklist violation!!

    @juliaallison: “Do you ever get the sense that everyone is better at having fun than you? Or is that just me?”

    Between this and her “not my best ski attitude”, I’ll bet dear Donks has been such a pleasure to be around.

    • Debbie’s days are numbered (if she can find a suitable replacement to OBO him for)..

      But, I don’t think she has the looks, body or personality to do better than Devie at this time. So she’s stuck with him. Suck it up, bitch.. he’s all you got. 🙂

      • Yeah, she’d like to OBO, but won’t get the opportunity. He’s so far from the professor or entrepreneur she imagined herself with. So blessed!

    • And you know what? Yeah, other people are better at having fun than you Jules, because they’re caught up in the joy of the moment, not wondering if it will make other people jealous or taking a zillion photos until one comes close to approximating the “look” of fun. Sad donkey is just plain sad.

    • Well, it would be in keeping w/ D0nkey’s birthcray tradition if she has caused yet another girlfriend to hit the bricks …

      Aw, Chef CodeMonkey, we hardly knew ya.

    • She’s probably home now looking at Facebook and seeing updates from people who didn’t spend their weekend “actualizing.”

    • Right? Sounds like she’s been a raging cunt all weekend. No ring? Not enough of a fuss made? Could be anything, really.

    • She’s just such a perfectionist and has so many projects going on, she can’t take the time to relax even for one weekend. She’s a workaholic who can’t take a break to go skiing without thinking of all the other other projects she should be working on. Those pink Radio Shack cell phone cases don’t sell themselves.

  25. This just in, complete with smiley.

    24 m 125k JuliaAllison: Oh what a night 😉 · Reply · RT

  26. (I’m somewhat of a neat freak … which means the house always looks great!!)
    [img]http://i1208.photobucket.com/albums/cc370/RBNSHeritageProject/6256_618573930735_1402715_36271824_1713804_n.jpg[/img]

    Does D0nkey EVER wash her hooves???

    • How do people manage to mate with her. She is so so so so so gross. My dick retracts inside and touches the backside of my belly button when I think about her being thexay.

  27. “That’s so Raven Tranny!”
    [img]http://i47.tinypic.com/2yulil2.png[/img]

    • YEAR, Greg dammit. Um, er, oops?
      BTW, Captcha said well now
      (And then Captcha laughed, literally, for 38 seconds)

      • Holy cats, I misspelled Julia Allison Baugher’s name too.

        #SausageSnappersFTW!

        • I believe Sarah Milligan was in DC, but she may also have been Indiana. (Wouldn’t shock me if Donkey’s OMG brazilliant idea to work for Kirkbot was based on someone else having a legit congressional internship.) The blonde is definitely a DC abomination. I’m ashamed I remember her “writing” about it. She blamed Britney Spears.

          • Miss Sarah Milligan went to IU with Julia (Sarah went on to graduate from there). You’re right that perhaps they met up in DC after Julia had left IU.

          • “She is one of the most remarkable women I’ve ever had the honor of knowing.” God, SHUT. UP.

          • Wow, in that blond and 20 photo there it appears Jules is enjoying the shit out of huge amounts of sugar and gluten.. mMmm

          • I love when she brags about working on the Hill. Wow, a full few months of full time work, such an accomplishment to land a job with a congressman who is friends with Daddy after you flunk out of a state school. Slow clap.

            Sure it was really crazy stuffing envelopes. What a carazy time! You and your friends living in DC, whoa!!!!! Shenanigans.

          • I wouldn’t have recognized her. Not because of the bad bleach job, but because she is eating cake with a utensil.

  28. Is she kidding us with this? Or has Devin magically changed her into a person who *doesn’t* stay up until sunrise Googling herself?

    Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison
    @jason_pontin – I probably need to party, but I’m not going because I’m too old and I like sleeping 9 hours a night.

    • This was in response to a tweet not directed at her about how this guy wasn’t going to go to SXSW. I guess Donks didn’t get on a panel this year…

    • This was discussed on SmugNom (re KERF) a week or so ago, but a need or desire to routinely sleep 9 or 10 hours a night could be a sign of some cognitive or other health issues. Lots of us probably sleep 9 or 10 hours on Sunday mornings or when we’re sick, but such a focus on sleep is probably a sign something is wrong.

      • We’re all individual, but I’m pretty sure that it’s anyone’s guess — Mayo Clinic doc Timothy Morgenthaler, M.D. says adults need 7-9 hrs sleep a night — the Sleep Foundation says there’s no magic # — I have a friend who gets 9-10 hrs before every workday, hits the ground running & then does the work of three people — I can’t sleep but a few hrs at a time, cat naps are my thing.

        That’s cute that you think her issues are demonstrated by sleeping too much, since she who went to a sleep study clinic due to lack of sleep lies through her buck teeth ALL *snap* THE *snap* TIME *snap* & that tweet was just a d0nkey butting in when no one was talking to her.

  29. Did any of you see the article on Brit Moron that Julia was fawning all over on Facebook? The SF Chronic declared Brit Brit to be the Martha Stewart of the tech generation. Of course Julia had to do some public ass kissing about this. I cannot stand Brit – her crafts are horrible and dumb and her food is slop. She only is where she is because of who she married, which is just so sad and pathetic. And yet even Brit has accomplished more and has a better work ethic than Julia.

    • She is a useless human being. I hate people that fuck/marry their way to success.

      • Especially when there is no humility or awareness about it. Does she really expect us to believe she would have penthouse office if not for her husband’s funding? It’s so disingenuous. Her whole site is one big narcissistic vanity project that completely lacks substance.

        Also,Martha Stewart would DIE before she shoved a used yoga mat into a wine bottle or wrapped a gift in worn tight (barf). The idea that this dingbat is the new Martha is utterly ridiculous.

        • Seriously, anybody seriously comparing Brit Brit to Martha should be struck down by lightning.

        • Whatever I think of dumbdumb Brit, or MayorMaherBeechHare, or Randi Teefs, or any of the other ladies Julie’s tried to bite the action of, I am thrilled when they succeed because I know how much it must wince her.

          Even MMBH has a boyfriend with a job, and though she is also the CEO of a typo-riddled website, she updates it fairly regularly, unlike Julie’s stagnant pink monument to incompetence (hers and hundred-year tech guru Diet Seltzer).

          • It is sad that MMBH’s only ad is for her testicle bags, tho. But hey, actually getting the testicle bags made is more than Julie has accomplished in years.

          • Interesting about the wristicle though … didn’t MMBH get something like a $10k in investment or loan to breathe life into those deflated ballsacs, & then she coincidentally got a boob job around the same time?

            I’m thinking some lender is going to ask for an expense statement & coincidentally shit a brick …

          • @ Albie – MMBH just wrote a post for Jezebel the other day, too. Hell might freeze over any day now…

      • putting cookie dough on a stick is not “hacking” it.
        but thank you, brit morin, for perpetuating the idea that “girls want something pinker and sparklier.”

        • … and that we need a,b,c directions to be creative; and that “girls” in thir 20s and 30s can only handle kindergarten-level craft projects; and that we need to “brand” our every effort with a cutesy concept like “making” and “doing”

      • She’s the most god awful thing ever created by marriage. All she does is troll Kickstarter and Pinterest all day for content when she’s not trying to pass toddler crafts as, well, crafts. HOW FUCKING USEFUL AND ORIGINAL.

    • And– surprise!– her Craigslist blurb has abysmal grammar, spelling, and punctuation.

      She was extremely unappealing. Where does Bravo get these people???

      • Ah you’ve seen Andy, equally as obnoxious, he’s a grifter like them, only with celeb friends now.

  30. OK, so she wrote that post about not knowing how to have fun while she was still in Tahoe with Debbie. Wow. They just now left. Modesto, here they come!

    Julia Allison
    24 minutes ago near South Lake Tahoe, CA via mobile
    Leaving Tahoe, headed to D’s parents house for dinner & a sleepover, then back to SF in the morning, and LA soon thereafter. What a wonderful birthday weekend!
    Like · Share
    6 people like this.

  31. Oh how the mighty have fallen. It was only a few years ago that PK flew her out to Aspen for her birthday. And she thought she was too good for him! Fast forward to today and she gets youtube videos and a stop over in seedy Modesto with her dementor look alike, fake Chef grifter boyfriend. Gotta love karma.

      • That’s a heckofa conspiracy theory there, but plausible nonetheless.. Donk would have to keep quiet about it online since the Modesto clan follow her on FB and probably Twitter, too.

        I’m just not sure Donk could keep anything like that a secret though and would be too tempted to brag and bray all over that she was engaged.. Hmm.

        • They’ve met her before, so they know she’s a donkey/melting marionette/fartbubble of misplaced self-importance.

          • “fartbubble of misplaced self-importance”

            For the love of all that is gloriously snarky and depressingly accurate, won’t someone please adopt this name?

      • If she got engaged this weekend and was braying about not having fun, she’s an even bigger jackass than we guessed.

        • Debbie either fell to one knee and proposed or both knees for a bit of sexytimes – eww, visuals, eww!

          Either scenario would have been to simply shut Donks up.

      • i was a gay mexican’s female date at a wedding a long time go just to shut up his family

        they eventually gave up

  32. If the engagement/ring wasn’t up to her “standards” then, of course, she’d lose her mind.
    And – although she’d typically bray about it immediately, she’d wait if they needed to engage the CZ or stage a better engagement moment story/photo.

    • Okay, that’s freaking hilareballz, cuz mah dawg’s travel bag looks just like that, only w/ bones instead of flowers, & it was a dollar store item. Can’t believe I didn’t make the connection until now — I’m guessing it’s Biology.

      • Wait…Mare Mare INVENTED that slip-through wrist let. She is the Madame Curie of ball sacks; the Thomas Edison of effortless ideas; the Alexander Graham Bell of hiring foreign, underpaid child labor. Just ask Donna Karan! Ohhhhh…there will be lawyers!

          • LOLyers is one of the best things I have ever learned on this site. I can no longer hear or say “lawyers” without chuckling.

          • Totally dead.

            If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s someone who claims to be a fashion designer, but has absolutely no original design sense whatsoever. I haven’t kept up with her in ages, but Mary’s outfits always made me yawn. Of course, Donk’s outfits always make me cringe. That hasn’t changed one bit.

  33. Julia Allison
    11 minutes ago near San Francisco, CA via mobile
    I’ll be on CNN at 11:30 am PST / 2:30 pm EST. (CNN’s Newsroom with Brooke Baldwin)

    So, that’s going to happen. CAN’T *snap* WAIT *snap*

    • I was watching CNN – now, of course, I’ll have to keep watching. Love that – moments after you posted – the anchor said a terrible storm has hit Chicago, but it’s goin to get worse. “This storm is just getting organized, just getting out of bed, so to speak” and I thought “oh that must be Julie’s intro”

      • LOL

        “This storm is just getting organized, just getting out of bed, LITERALLY”

    • i had CNN on at 11:30 on the dot, and they were talking about a surrogate mother who didn’t get an abortion for a baby with health problems. no julia. is she coming up, or did i already miss it?

        • The bloat is coming back. No engagement ring in this shot, but I haven’t given up hope.

          Jacy, are you ready for our pretty pink princess grifter wedding jamboree and final alienation from reality/humankind?

        • Wow! What an accomplishment! Doing the same thing you did 5 years ago, going on tv talking about shit no one cares about that you know nothing about and looking stupid doing it. Such career progression. /eyeroll.

          Nice hot pink blazer. I can’t. I am so over that fucking hair already.

          • Who told her to make it so severe? That hard part with one side yanked behind her ear just baffles me.

          • Why? did I go look? Bleh. All I see is that gaudy earring clashing w/ multi-colored brooch clashing w/ about-to-pop-&-take-someone’s-eye-out gold button on hideous fuschia jacket & omg wtf is wrong w/ her back leg, can she not straighten it out, is it that bowed, really? Like, whoaaa.

          • JFAing myself to say that the idea of her with non-McCain in-laws is hilarious. She really thought she was in for a lifetime of hopscotching between family properties in coveted locations, receiving lavish gifts for every occasion and being supported by various trusts for the rest of her days. Instead she’s got a costume “broach” from the probably-perfectly-nice Modesto Stetler’s and a lifetime of supporting an unemployed chef de fauxsine to look forward to.

            It is to chortle merrily.

          • guess debbie’s parents are ready to let him take her down the aisle/isle/i’ll. the hairy times will indeed be familial.

        • Wow, she really is looking more and more like her dead grandmother every day. Put a greasy wig on NGMB and cover up some of the liver spots and she could have passed for Julia.

        • That’s so weird they just hoist up a big TV w/ a shot of SF behind her instead of using a green screen and chroma key..

          And the red lipstick is looking really crazy there. Not sure if that’s her color. But what do I know.

      • aha, NOW. #trending!
        pink blazer, SF background. four other panelists.
        jaba says: no, the surrogate did not do the right thing, she signed a legal document. breach of contract. DANGEROUS PRECEDENT!

          • “entertainment journalist”
            football, up next!
            the psychologist actually had a good perspective on the native american joke. then julie just said “I agree!”

        • it sounds like the scenario of the child having birth defects was poorly defined in the contract. we don’t know the exact language of the contract, though. but it sounds like she was within her legal rights to do what she did. whether that was morally right is of course different. she became a surrogate for the money, being a single mom with only modest means, and for a while at least, was willing to abort the baby for the price of $15k. she was definitely conflicted. maybe everyone involved should have given more thought to the bad scenario (=baby with birth defects) before they signed on to this. i guess, as the surrogate, the default is to respect the biological parents’ wishes (the surrogate has no rights or responsibilities to the baby), so if the bio parents wanted an abortion, i guess she should have gone along with that.

        • I think the answer our blinking Donkdonk gave might be the only thing she’s ever been right about. (I assume Dadsers told her what to say during her cab ride to the station).
          My opinion? I am 100% against abortion. But the surrogate shouldn’t have signed a contract that explicitly said abortion would be an option for that set of parents.

        • OK, just making sure. I thought the surrogate was a little draconian in her sanctimoniousness.

          • I felt pretty uncomfortable with what I read myself and I think it was because she invoked religion and God in her decision. (I grew up godless in a socialist country.)

            But at the end of the day I think no contract should be able to force a woman into a medical procedure she does not want.

          • CLARIFICATION: Better lawyers should have been inevitable when drawing up the contract.

        • I don’t find fault w/ either party’s position, so no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ opinion from me; I just wanted to say that I’m so glad (understatement) for that baby that people like those who adopted her exist.

          Years ago, a family friend’s baby was born w/ a multitude of anomalies & birth defects; she had 20-ish surgeries & an amputation by her 1st birthday — today, she’s a well-adjusted young lady w/ a great education, impressive job, & now a new husband.

          I think that baby will be okay, & I’ll bet money that she leads a more rewarding life than any d0nkey we know.

          • I guess I commend the surrogate for putting in the work to find a family to adopt the child instead of just putting that poor child in the system.

    • Same questions here, SJS! What was her chyron this time around, since we all know she has no jerb?

        • But I thought she left Star (or you know, contract went without renewal) because she hated that line of work? Huh? At this point she’s grasping for relevant chyrons. Well.. I guess relevancy, period.

        • OMG WHAT IS SHE TALKING ABOUT? HOW DID SHE ANSWER THE QUESTION? SHE IS SUCH A HAM. SO PAINFUL.

        • Just think of all the great industry contacts she must have made while building her reality teevee empire! She’s practically a Hilton! And soon she’ll be ready for her close up in Real Housewives of Modesto!

    • I changed channels because I couldn’t believe CNN would invite her on for a panel on surrogacy. wtf?

      • The key to getting on a cable news panel is to be breathing and at the studio for the broadcast. Truly, if you live in a major media market, “stardom” is yours. That’s what made it so funny when she got banned from Red Eye.

        • Nod blink blink nod swallow head tilt bray bray blink bray bray bray blink bray blink blink nod swallow swallow head tilt blink nod blink nod nod.

      • OMG, she’s horrible! Blink blink, head tilt, look at meee look at mee! WTF does she know about football players?

    • Doesn’t she still have part of that horrid “sexy lady with warbonnet” picture in her facebook profile? Who books the talent for those things?

  34. Woah. I’m watching CNN getting my daily Brook Baldwin fix (I love you Brooke!) and the donk is on right now talking about Joe Flacco’s new contract. Sports Donkey to the rescue!

  35. “I’m not sure that money is a good gage of respect. How you treat people. How you conduct yourself as a human being. That’s what makes people respect you.”

    Wait…what? That can’t be right…

    • My bad. She said “How you treat OTHER people”. That must be the legalese of it all. Maybe she means people ‘other than the ones you see, speak to, or otherwise interact with’.

      Makes more sense now… I knew that couldn’t be right.

  36. Something tells me that Donkey didn’t even read the caption under the first picture*, much less the entire blog post of Chaz Forman, but there she is, recommending it as if it’s somehow illuminating (it’s not).

    *He himself says: “I left with more questions than answers.”

    • Donk was never known for doing any homework on the subjects before appearing on these panels.. Lazy.

    • LOL because he mentions his tinnitus and he told a cat lady personally that he suspected he got it from going out with a Braying Donkey.

      Other than that, though, that piece makes him sound like a complete hypochondriac. I am surprised they didn’t get along better, but I suppose you can’t have two fanciful disease-imaginers in one relationship.

      Why did she remove it from her FB page, I wonder?

      • Man, that was fast! So obvious that Julia Allison got on RBD as quick as she could to read the comments following her CNN blinkathon.

        Ima guess she removed it because even she realized that it made her look like a braying ass to lead in w/ her rec as though it were some OMG! Mayo Clinic! health & science breakthrough when all it really did is remind the basement dwellers that she’s a braying ass, as any of her exes will (& do) attest to.

        ‘About a week later, [Charles] Forman announces that he and [Julia] Allison have split. He also says the tinnitus is gone. “I mean, it could just be a coincidence,” he says.’
        http://gawker.com/5057041/playboys-of-tech-story-proves-some-people-do-need-publicists

  37. Another day, another $450. Way to go, Julie, you may break four figures for the month of March at this rate!

    • Of course, the real payoff isn’t the check from the studio, it’s the check from Dadsers. “I was on CNN” has to be worth something to sad old Pettifogger, funding his daughter’s sham(e) of a career.

      • Fear not, Albie, she’s not getting a dime from CNN. The only time guests get paid by these cable outlets is if they are an official contributor on contract. Ari Fleischer and Van Jones get paid every time they go on air, Julia does not. I think CNN under new leadership is trying to blur the lines between hard news, politics, sports, and entertainment, hence the weirdo mash-up of topics in her segment.

        • A no-name like her definitely does NOT get paid. I know journalists with actual semi-high profiles who do not get paid for going on CNN or any type of similar panel — you do it for exposure and to raise the profile of your company.

          • Exactly. It takes a surprisingly large amount of time to do these short cable hits – time to prep at least a little, time traveling to/from studio, time in makeup, time waiting in green room, time sitting in the chair mic’d up waiting. The segment itself is like 10% of the total time you spend. So doing it for your ego is a waste. You do it to “build your brand” and to develop a platform/sell a book/push a point of view, or you do it to get on bookers’ radar at other networks or in hopes of getting a contract.

            What point of view is Julia advocating? What book or show or product is she pushing? None and none. She is all she advocates, she is the product, but nobody is really buying but grifters anymore.

          • Yes, I had a friend who is becoming a very well known legal talking head – does about 100 times as many appearances as JA, and she always lamented not getting paid. No way bitch is getting money.

        • God, that mash-up of topics was jarring, as was the constant commerical breaks. This is why I listen to NPR.

          • The new head of the network was the guy behind the rise of the Today show, so the network is getting a little more pop culture/Today-ified. (Example: CNN’s wall to wall coverage of that cruise ship mess a few weeks ago.)

        • Ah! I assumed you got the AFTRA appearance scale for things like this, as you would for a chat show. Thank you!

          Well, then, it’s all about the Dadsers money, then. Seeing as she has no actual paying projects to promote. Cargo cult career.

    • The guy is the Communications Director for the Navajo Nation office in D.C.:

      Jared King ‏@JRODDC: @JuliaAllison we are fixing the problem. What are you doing about it? RACIST IDIOT! #RACISTJOKESABOUTINDIANS #Navajo @CNN

      And of course Julia feels compelled to respond and climbs on her high horse:
      Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison: @JRODDC – I’m surprised the communications director would write something like “racist idiot” in a tweet. Unprofessional & unnecessary.

      I didn’t watch the CNN show so I have no idea what spurred the tweet from the Navajo rep. (Did Julia suggest that multiculturalism is destroying free speech so hahaha injuns you lose?)

      • I notice she did not deny making a potentially racist comment. She merely attacked him for using a term she finds offensive, but one that many might tend to agree with.

      • Guess one drunken Indian’s boss is about to get an email from Jack McCain’s lawyer’s new Modesto office.

    • And from our favourite pile of buttons:

      Franchesca Ramsey ‏@chescaleigh

      .@JRODDC taking @JuliaAllison’s advice. here’s my attempt at “fixing problem”. stop wearing headdresses. it’s RACIST http://i.imgur.com/itEGweS.jpg?1

      Chesca, <3. My native kids and others thank you for calling her out.

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