Well Looky Here

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The most shocking thing about this story is that Mark Kirk had an extra-marital girlfriend. Surely they messed up the gender? Dodie is actually Dobie?

I wonder if all of Donkey’s WHY DO MALE POLITICIANS ALWAYS CHEAT ON ALL THE GIRLS was related to this? She was maid of honor at their wedding, no? Look at this puff piece.

Good call, Donkey! Glad you and your parents are such big supporters of such a slimeball slimeballs, and that you violated whatever wafer-thin principles you had to pretend you were a Republican to impress the son of a famous Republican senator. That worked out so well for you. L-O-S-E-R, party of one!

 

118 COMMENTS

    • and going back to the discussion of malapropisms in the previous thread, one of my favorites was julia’s incorrect linking (and thus complete misunderstanding) of “DMZ” here, incidentally quoted as part of advice from the former Mrs. Kirk.

  1. Do you think Dodie McCracken was at the North Shore Assisted Living Facility and Catfish Hut last Thanksgiving? Maybe she and Raul can trade sexy sex-with-a-closeted-nerd tips.

    Related: Dodie McCracken is one of the most unfortunate names I’ve ever seen.

    Stay classy Baughers.

    • Dobby McCracken?

      [img]http://images.wikia.com/harrypotter/images/d/dd/Dobby1.jpg[/img]

    • I laughed out loud at her name… Of course the politician DONK associates with would have a mistress named “Dodie McCracken”.

        • Oh, crap, Athens & Sparta Counsel is the Klassy-cal name of ex-wife/Julia bud Vertolli’s “consulting firm,” not Dodie McCracken’s. Either way, tools, either way.

    • Who knows? They do look pretty chummy in a photo found here (click through; I can’t link to the specific one) from last year a couple of months before dead bird day, if the donkey-like tit-thrust is anything to go by …

      I’m confused on the chronology of events … Kirk got divorced three years ago, 2009, yes? And so, his illegal siphoning of campaign funds to his girlfriend in 2012, two years ago, is an extra-marital affair? Is this just a badly-worded article, or what am I missing?

      • There is probably nothing untoward here. They were long divorced. She (Kimberly, the ex-wife) is appears to be using the media and the Federal Election Commission to settle some old scores with her ex.

        It is stunningly clear why Julia was her maid of honor. This ex wife is all about using publicity to get back at an ex. Kirk paid his girlfriend a salary. He also paid his ex-wife a salary. And here is what the ex wife says about that:

        While alleging that the payments to McCracken [Kirk’s now ex girlfriend] may have violated FEC rules, Vertolli [Kimberly, Kirk’s ex wife] said the money paid to her did not.

        source.

        • Apparently he also paid his mother from campaign funds & bought his step-mother a car using campaign funds (if what I’ve read so far is truthful) & down-thread here, Prof FC says PettiFogger was his Finance Chair, which begs the question, just how much in-the-loop was ol’ Petey on all of Kirk’s $henanigan$?

          • Most importantly, did JABA get any $$ for using her social media expertise to promote his campaign?

          • Step-mother, huh? That explains his own failed marriage: he came from a broken home.

          • he was the finance chair for Kirk’s congressional campaign, and a member of the finance committee for the senate campaign. this is all listed on dadsers’s law firm website.

          • Wondering the same things Not!Random! It makes all her consulting/advising seem plausible if these well connected friends of her dad are just doing similarly shady things.

        • It’s really telling that this woman made the 19-year-old donkey daughter of her FIANCE’S family friend the maid of honor at her wedding. Few resources and even fewer friends.

  2. Isn’t the former Mrs. Kirk a likely secret cat person? I recall reading something she had said or written that was very anti-Donkey.

    • My only recollection is the former Mrs. Kirk getting pissed off when Donkey, abetted by OMG! Randi, moved the beard from “friend” to “fan” on FB. As if Julia Allison has any fans in the United States!

    • Even though it’s my guess that this was after her first nose job, post-IU and during the 2000 campaign, I can’t get over how much she looks like Robin here. She was pretty. And so full of dreams!

      In her senior year at Georgetown, Ms. Baugher is currently in the dual bachelors / masters program in American government. She expects to receive her BA in May of 2004 and her MA in 2005. She recently signed a development deal with Spelling Television to create a show based upon her column – “it will be a sort of Sex and the City: the College Years,” she says.

      Although she has dated medical students, law students, a CIA agent, and of course, a Congressman, Baugher is currently single, having just broken up with a fellow Georgetown student, the son of investment billionaire Sir Michael Fay of New Zealand.

      “I’m not getting married anytime soon,” says Baugher. “I figure I still have about seven more years of dating in me!”

      http://web.archive.org/web/20041011061438/http://www.juliabaugher.com/Bio.htm

      • if she had just broken up with james in november 2003, and wasn’t planning to get married “anytime soon”, how fuck did she find herself engaged to a dude six months later? probably the same way she left him for alex and moved to new york within a year.

          • good point, SS. she probably never was in the joint program, and just concocted this lie about dadsers not paying for a 5th MA year to get out of it (the original lie). (she had apparently received her Mrs. degree by that point, being engaged and all, so why should have dadsers continued to bankroll her? fastforward eight years and here we are…)

          • there is such a program(Accelerated Dual Degree Programs (for current Georgetown University undergraduates ONLY) : Government (A.B./M.A.) – American Government only) at Georgetown. the requirements may have made a donkey balk.

          • Wow. That post is unbelievable (literally and in the colloquial sense.) I don’t know how I missed it before. It’s just layer upon layer of lie after lie. And the SMUG: “And he said, ‘Come on the show.’ Of course, they had to find a counterpart. They got this woman, who was probably in her fifties. She was officially a political consultant. She did not know what she was talking about. I was the young one, she was the older, more entrenched, and I could tell she had no idea what she was talking about.”

          • Please! Julia barely made it out of Georgetown with an undergrad degree, and there was no way in hell the grad school would put up with the non-stop shenanigans that poor Dean Anne Sullivan endured in the college, and Julia knew it.

          • I love this part: “…A lot of my friends said, “Oh please, who are you to be a Democratic strategist?” At first I laughed along. Then I thought, “Wait a second, wait a second. Not only did I study this, and not only did I work on the Hill, but I spend a lot of time thinking about it…”

          • I can’t even read this post. From the snippets here it’ll cause major, atomic level code red rage. She really thinks she is special. Wow.

        • Tinypic’s Captcha’s are always priceless 🙂
          [img]http://i49.tinypic.com/8vngch.png[/img]
          “TAKE UMBRAGE” (!!!)

          LOL, that’s what I’m sayin’! Ya just know that it’s got to razz Dad$er’s berries that Donkey has blown so much of his money on fucking herself in the face.

        • FREE THE CRAZY EYES

          [img]http://www.popscreen.com/assets/thumbs/v/original/151648DrW_o.jpg[/img]

        • Whoa! Kirk looks screamingly gay in this snap, TJ Kelly “Oh, it’s so big!” gay. Dobie, indeed!

        • You rang, Emma?

          Goodness, the makeup here. And the jacket. And one of the old noses.

        • WOW. Homely Donkey is homely.

          You know what I’m really going to enjoy once Miss Advised airs? When Julie’s high school ‘friends’ dig out her pre-op pix and post them online.

          Or, better yet, when they’ve submit them anonymously to RBD (I’m looking at YOU: R. Billow, Elly, Dan, Via, Cadillac de Biergarten, Little Brother Britton).

  3. I just had a thought: the timing of Bravo’s release of The Donkityville Whorerrr just gets sweeter & sweeter, does it not, if Dad$er himself undergoes some public scrutiny for his dealings w/ Kirk at about the same time?

    • I can see it now: the compelling subplot full of political intrigue, starring a powerful Chicago lawyer, the senator he pines for, and a girl with a fivehead and a keyboard (Toilet Julia can write the theme music). The Miss Advised spinoff will be called The A-List: Downtown Condo edition.

      …nah, the whole show will be just be boring old Julia sitting around in her Lulu Lemon [sic], googling herself and crying into a box of cupcakes. Sad Donkey is sad when even old farts like Kirk can get more action than her.

    • Finance Chairs usually just help raise money, they are not involved in the day to day operations, auditing, bookkeeping etc.

      • Would a Finance Chair be in charge of ‘massage therapy’, ‘shower assistance’, ‘Raul time’ or gay porn DVDs?

      • Thanks what I thought. Doesn’t the Treasurer handle the accounting operations?

        • The treasurer signs financial filings, but the actual work is done by an accountant with campaign experience and assistants, if necessary.

  4. Julia’s editor at Capitol File banned her from writing for the mag after finding out that Julia knew the Kirks personally. Which is saying something since Niche Media isn’t known so much for their journalistic integrity.

  5. Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison
    Maybe a silly question, but I want to plant some pretty flowers in these planters indoors – what are the best (read: least likely to die)?

    You guuys, what are the best pretty flowers that won’t die?

      • Please twatter this to the crowd sourcing maroon. Thank you and I hope you have a lovely day!

    • Is it really so fucking difficult to Google “flowering indoor house plants????”

      Seriously????

      BRAYGE

    • she should have worded it differently. something like ‘i’m new to gardening. what are easy to maintain indoor plants that are pet friendly?’

      also, since im feeling service-y, julia, since you read here, go to gurneys.com. i get all my plants and flowers there. they ship stuff bare root and if there’s ever anything wrong and the plants dont grow, they’ll send you new ones.

      YOURE WELCOME, asshat.

    • [img]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_NscWcVxkCCc/Sm5An1hhwLI/AAAAAAAAAoE/bMA7uCZOA3E/s400/donkey+ears+Kalanchoe+Gastonis.jpg[/img]

      Donkey ears are extremely easy to grow and leaves will root on their own. Plus, irony!

  6. Get ready for some smug-ass cray cray, everyone – Donks got her first @BravoAndy shoutout. Well, sort of…

    2h Andy Cohen ‏@BravoAndy

    @AmyLaurentMatch @juliaallison @sexwithemily yahooo!
    Hide conversation

    And, just like that, her life has meaning.

  7. Apparently Andy Cohen DOES respond to SOME tweets – Just NOT JULIA ALLISON’S (Miss Advised #Misadvised #SEO #ad #FuckYouJuliaAllison,LoveAndy). It took Andy all of two minutes to reply to Amy Laurent. Even though I’ve seen the promo yet still couldn’t pick her out of a crowd, so indistinct is she, I like her better than A Donkey. And so does Andy, it seems:

    Amy Laurent ‏@AmyLaurentMatch
    @BravoAndy Just saw our promo on Bravo for Miss Advised! SO EXCITED to air June 18th!!! @juliaallison @sexwithemily love you girls!!
    5:53 PM – 29 May 12 via web

    Andy Cohen ‏@BravoAndy
    @AmyLaurentMatch @juliaallison @sexwithemily yahooo!
    Hide conversation
    Reply Retweet Favorite
    5:55 PM – 29 May 12 via web

  8. I love that, according to her Twatter, the Observer just interviewed Mar Mar Beach Hair about Julia’s new television venture. Will Mary be stealth cunt or outright bitch?

  9. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. Our Dear Ol’ Donks is being intervierviewed via Skypse tomorrow from some 18 year-old journalist/social media maven/model/restaurant host.

    Summer Tonsfeldt ‏@SummerTons
    skype interview with the columnist @JuliaAllison tomorrow 🙂

    Leaving aside the obvious “columnist WHERE” questions the above tweet raises, it now seems clear that the publicist at Bridge and Tunnel Communications is doing some kind of bang-up job.

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