OMG! She’s Moving To L.A.! Again.

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I think I finally hit the proverbial wall with regard to the journeygirl lifestyle. It’s time to get a permanent address … in LA.

Let’s revisit the last time she brayed this announcement, shall we? (And one of the last times Gawker paid any attention to her). She made all sorts of major noise about her big move to Los Angeles in August 2010 (RUN, TOPH EGGERS, RUN LIKE MOTHERFUCKING HELL!!!), only to scrub any mention of L.A. out of the post a few months later. Because she is a weirdo whackadoodle tooljob.

The original post:

BIG NEWS: I’M MOVING TO LA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My landlord sold the apartment in which I now live, and I have to be out by August 13th, so I spent the past two weeks looking for apartments in Manhattan – but when I put a deposit down on one I really liked, something just didn’t feel right.

So after (almost) six years in New York, I’ve decided it’s time to, uh, mix it up a bit.

I’ve been thinking about moving to LA since October of last year, but inertia (and perhaps a bit of fear) got in my way. Plus, as much as New York drives me crazy, I love this city – it’s the only place I’ve lived as an adult, and yes, it feels like home, more than Chicago, more than DC, more so than any place I’ve ever lived. In fact, from the moment I moved here in November of 2004, it just felt … like me. I am, in so many ways, a New Yorker, with all that entails (good and bad!) and I can’t imagine not feeling that way.

That said, I need a change. I need new challenges, and I need to get out of my comfort zone. (Famous last words! haha) I remembermoving to New York – with five giant boxes, two suitcases, one dog, an apartment I shared with two roommates I found on Craigslist, ten grand in the bank and no job prospects. I knew about four people in the entire city – and yes, I was petrified. But what I found is that being thrown into the deep end is the surest way of learning to swim … FAST. I wasn’t going to allow myself to sink.

So I’m throwing myself into the deep end again. I’ll probably be petrified again. That’s sort of par for the course with uprooting your entire life to move 3,000 miles away from everything you know.

But if I don’t try this now, I don’t know if I ever will. And I know for sure I would regret that. I keep thinking of this little piece of artwork in my grandparents’ house in Glendale, which had a drawing of a tiny boat with a William Shedd quote: “A ship in the harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for.”

So I’m leaving the safe harbor of New York for the stormy seas of LA … and I hope you wish me luck. I’ll need it.

Besides, the harbors of New York aren’t going anywhere. 😉


And here’s the toolbag weirdo post several months later, likely tinkered with at 4 a.m. by a sobbing Donkey who by then had been squatting for months for free in her parents’ OMG downtown condo OMG in Chicago, a city she clearly believes is beneath her :

BIG NEWS: I’M MOVING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My landlord sold the apartment in which I now live, and I have to be out by August 13th, so I spent the past two weeks looking for apartments in Manhattan – but when I put a deposit down on one I really liked, something just didn’t feel right.

So after (almost) six years in New York, I’ve decided it’s time to, uh, mix it up a bit.

I’ve been thinking about moving since October of last year, but inertia (and perhaps a bit of fear) got in my way. Plus, as much as New York drives me crazy, I love this city – it’s the only place I’ve lived as an adult, and yes, it feels like home, more than Chicago, more than DC, more so than any place I’ve ever lived. In fact, from the moment I moved here in November of 2004, it just felt … like me. I am, in so many ways, a New Yorker, with all that entails (good and bad!) and I can’t imagine not feeling that way.

That said, I need a change. I need new challenges, and I need to get out of my comfort zone. (Famous last words! haha) I remember moving to New York – with five giant boxes, two suitcases, one dog, an apartment I shared with two roommates I found on Craigslist, ten grand in the bank and no job prospects. I knew about four people in the entire city – and yes, I was petrified. But what I found is that being thrown into the deep end is the surest way of learning to swim … FAST. I wasn’t going to allow myself to sink.

So I’m throwing myself into the deep end again. I’ll probably be petrified again. That’s sort of par for the course with uprooting your entire life to move miles away from everything you know.

But if I don’t try this now, I don’t know if I ever will. And I know for sure I would regret that. I keep thinking of this little piece of artwork in my grandparents’ house in Glendale, which had a drawing of a tiny boat with a William Shedd quote: “A ship in the harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for.”

So I’m leaving the safe harbor of New York for the stormy seas of somewhere else … and I hope you wish me luck. I’ll need it.

Besides, the harbors of New York aren’t going anywhere. 😉

Whatever, Donk. I said it two years ago and I’ll say it again. She’s not moving to L.A.

211 COMMENTS

  1. Exciting days at Runyon Canyon and the Earth Bar, I’m sure. Starfuckers come and go all the time here… This one is no different.

    • Mmm hmm. The Bravo show changes things a bit. I wouldn’t be surprised if she went through with the move this time. She thinks she’s gonna be famous.

  2. also, wasn’t she going to discuss the digital nomad lifestyle with erica whatserface at SXSW in a few months?

    julia, you weakling! tim ferriss would never give up this easily! you just need more raw eggs (dairy!), some kettleballs, and annie lalla’s wedding dress and you’ll be back at the airport in no time. maybe add a dash of michael ellsberg’s eyebrows while you’re at it. special price for you, only $1700!

  3. Wow, what a fabulous idea for a woman who is obsessed with her appearance to the point of plastic surgery addiction and laxative abuse! SURELY MOVING TO LA IS THE IDEAL MILIEU FOR HER!

    • Also, I guess that means the plug on her “Windy City LIVE!” occasional appearance gig has finally been pulled (perhaps the hosts sprained their side-eye last time?)

    • Indeed Albie Quirky. Who moves to LA at the age of 30 with no job skills? How depressing would that be?

      • The thing is that she doesn’t really care if she has any job skills or not, because she invests zero time or money or effort in developing them.

        It is clear that the only things that interest her are her appearance and her celebrity, which is why moving to LA is going to be a constant source of torture to her!

  4. PS. of course this announcement has something to do with a new wallet. and/or bravo pilot. if not the latter, what convinced dadsers to start paying rent for donkey again?

      • Ha! Called it yesterday. (It’s 5:31 Eastern time and nothing up yet, so I think this is a safe call, unlike the time a while back when they posted it at 3:30 Eastern.)

          • Didn’t she sign her contract with TMS last October? It may have just expired and they chose not to pick it up again.

          • @ES — She’s still going to call herself an international syndicated columnist. She still refers to herself, according to her bio, as a talk show host on NBC and a TONY columnist

  5. The altering of the original post so far after the fact is just so bizarre. Who does she think she’s fooling?? Maybe herself. Huh. Anyway. What a weirdo.

    • not to mention BOS. britt and allie are SO BLESSED that princess pelts will be in a time zone three hours behind, and at least 6 hours away by plane.

    • YES. I can finally breathe now that there won’t be any Donkey passing celiac wind on Michigan Ave.

      PS. Where’s Lily?

      • Yay, Pink Palatian! I hope you have been around here less of late because good things are happening on the job-search and/or freelancing front?

  6. This one might happen if it’s for the filming of the OMG reality show. She-with-the-Snooki-sized-fingers might actually move out of her parent’s house for a few months.

    And maybe her parents cut off her credit card and she can’t fly anymore.

    • I’m thinking this is all for the reality show. Only makes sense. They are probably renting a place for her, too and she’s just planting the seed.

      • This makes sense because the radio host is in LA and we were speculating that she would be on the show as well. As someone previously pointed out, Bravi wasn’t about to pay for their crew to take pointless trips all over the country, so it seems likely that they’re forcing her to settle down a bit.

        • who else is going to be on the show? was it announced? wondering if this radio host you speak of is the imboycrazy alexi girl? would be amazing–i’m not a fan, but she’s a million times cuter and more likable than donks.

          • Didn’t we surmise that the “radio host” was the “Sex With Emily” person on whose pathetisad Interwebs show A Donkey embrayassed herself a while back?

          • OHHHH. Yeah, that makes more sense. I was sorta hoping Alexi would put the Donker to shame. But nobody puts the Donker to shame the way the Donker puts herself to shame.

        • Of course Bravo insisted on her moving to LA for the show. I watch a ton of reality TV so I know how the show is going to be structured. Anyone expecting appearances by Tucker Max, Momsers/Dadsers, Meghan/Megan/Meghann, or any of her other “friends” will be sorely disappointed.

          The show will only show her interacting with the other two dating advisors; they’ll be taping phone calls between the women, or show the girls going out for coffee or dinner to discuss their dating lives. For all intensive purposes (sic), these will appear to be the only friends she has. The men she’ll be dating have no doubt already been screened and approved. I suspect former Bachelor (and famewhore) Dr Andy Baldwin is one of the men who has been cast. Their twitter flirtation some weeks back indicates that. None of the dates will be “real” and no relationship shown will exist once the cameras are turned off. I think the show will be rather dull actually, I don’t know that I’ll even bother watching.

  7. A perfect fit – LA is one of the biggest shit holes in the U.S. What a brilliant move. Crappy air…horrible traffic….California taxes and retarded laws…earthquakes…a city that is completely broke in a state that is even more broke.

    Have fun.

    • Matthew, you’re so much dumber than you think you are. There’s nothing wrong with being a janitor unless you’re convinced you’re a neurosurgeon, because then somebody’s gonna get hurt.

  8. This ‘moving’ tweet shows up nowhere in my google reader nor do I see it on her twitterstream … did she delete? Already?

  9. Is there an LA bingo card yet?

    *Hikes up My Bald Runyon Canyon
    *Green juice with sausage snapper pointing at it
    *Donkey driving a rental car and getting a ticket
    *Crashing a Z-lister’s party

    On second thought, that’s all she ever does in LA, so not enough for a bingo card! Maybe a game of tic-tac-toe? Almost?

  10. emily rose tweets: I know it’s been a weird day when @juliaallison is sending me texts about boys in broken English

    CODENAME NEW WALLET

  11. “Yoo-hoo, Justine! I’m HOME!”

    “Julia?”

    “Yes bunny, it’s me! I’m moving here!!!”

    “Here?”

    “Yes, I’m moving to LA! And here!”

    “Uh, Julia…”

    “I just knew you wouldn’t mind if I stayed for a few months until I find a place of my own! I changed the address for my magazines, maybe some have arrived? We’ll have such such fun! Just like old times! Just like Black Rock City! Let’s do a clothes swap right now!”

  12. OK, I’m sorry but Abs Lawyer is totally fake: “Maybe it’s time to at least pause the merry-go-round? Not stop it forever, just jump off for a couple of rides.” – Abs Lawyer to me today”

    • This is just her rom com bullshit of how guys talk. GUYS DO NOT TALK LIKE THIS. LOL, she is such a bad liar!!! Even her friends are calling this guy out as BS.

    • FAKE. her exes always “say” something to this effect when her ass is dumped hard. “julia, you’re such a great person, i can’t cut you out of my life! you have to be my friend!”

    • Did she really write this? LOL!!!!!! Seriously lol infinity. EVERY FUCKING GUY she dates does this supposedly. “Let’s try this friends thing! We are not closing the door forever!” Just like Prom King right sweetie?

      They just aren’t that into you. Surely you’ve read that book.

      • Just like Pancakes too. Didn’t she claim that they would love each and be BFFs? After his mother and brother had to pry her sausage fingers off the doorframe of “the home they shared”, of course.

        • She claimed to be good friends with TK after too. She called him a “good kid” LOL! God, she never changes. Also if a guy DID make this absolutely retardo comment to you…you don’t immediately gag? You actually REPOST IT like it’s a fucking brilliant bon mot? Ugh. She’s a cliche ridden turd.

          • Seriously. If some guy said that to me I would cringe in embarassment. Luckily, no guy would say that ever, so. It’s just terrible dialogue. Gosh, no wonder she has a hard time finishing (or starting) that screenplay. No, wait. It’s because she’s a lazy bitch.

          • One, she is no way in hell friends with Codename TK. Second, if a guy said this to me, I would check him for a vagina.

          • If a guy said that to me, I’d probs leave skid-marks. If only my exes had known saying something stupid like that would have gotten rid of me quicker instead of them having to stop taking my phone calls and hiding under their covers when I pounded on their door at 2:00 am.

    • I call BS. Sometimes I Google her crap just for fun and I always, ALWAYS, wind up with a Sex and the City quote knock off that’s cheaper than her YSL tributes. In this case, it is here:
      http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Sex_and_the_City

      A merry-go-around quote. What does it tell you that it was the FIRST quote that came up when I Googled that first line?

    • “Maybe it’s time to at least pause the merry-go-round? Not stop it forever, just jump off for a couple of rides.”

      Great analogy for a Julia relaysh.

      1. The imaginary lolyer wants to stop going around in circles. This relationship isn’t going anywhere! Hasn’t Julia figured out that men and employers agree that she makes a much better one night stand than bride?

      2. Julia’s imaginary lolyer friend would stop the merry-go-round if he could, but he’s not the operator. He knows that the Donkey cray cray will be with him for a long time, much like Tucker Max’s herpes strain would be if the lolyer existed.

      3. Riding a plastic equine gets boring. And it hurts your crotch.

      Glad that even Julia evidently understands the drawbacks of dating her.

    • Have to say: I fucking LOVE IT when Our Donkey tries to be poetic and introspective. It’s some of the funniest shit on the fucking planet.

    • Also, even though we lawyers are douchey, I don’t know a single lawyer who would suggest or allow himself to be called “Abs Lawyer”. I mean, how fucking trashy is that?

      And really, this guy had no other characteristics than working out a lot? He’s that big of a loser?

      The guy didn’t exist, JP is absolutely correct.

  13. I love how being “thrown into the deep end” is moving to New York, living in a “craigslist” apartment, and having $10,000 in the bank. Man, I can’t believe she made it despite those odds. That JA is a fighter and a survivor.

    • I moved to NYC 7 years ago (at 18) with $1500 (that I earned myself) and a live-in nanny position. First year KICKED MY ASS.

    • i found one room in a shitty apt that i located on the NYU listserve when i first moved to NY. i had $1100 per month coming to me as a grad student stipend. my shit-box of a room cost me $725 monthly. that first year also kicked my ass. however, i managed to see more and do more than the donks has ever done, with all her eff-you money and opportunities.
      ps. i got a lot smarter after that first year when i realized that it was indeed possible to live in brooklyn or queens! where your money went much further!

    • Yes, that would be hilarious if it weren’t so horrifying. WOW WHAT A PIONEER SHE HAD ONLY $10,000 AND HER CREDIT CARDS! BUT SHE WAS PLUCKY ENOUGH TO OVERCOME THAT POVERTY-STRICKEN START!

      LET THEM LICK EAT CAKE!

    • Seriously. What a fucking retard she is. In her twee mind that is “roughing it.” Fuck you bitch, most people MY AGE don’t have that much savings. Not the ones I know. Ugh. I can’t stand her. Meanwhile she glommed onto married ex soon after. I bet she lived on her own for like a month.

        • Yeah that and, oh I don’t know, a FREE FUCKING EDUCATION? That she didn’t deserve anyway.

          She’s such a fucking tone deaf retard. She really has no goddamn idea the way most of the people in this country live. Get a job you asshole.

      • She knew Alex (the married guy with kids) before she moved to NYC. She left her fiance in LA area and moved to NY, but didn’t move in with Alex for a while, after the wife found out.

        • How long is a while though? Also if she was already seeing him, he was obviously paying her rent. Duh. God she is vile. Just really vile.

          • Not sure of the how long part and I’m not sure how we could find that out (or if it’s worth it) because Julier scrubbed all the good dirt from back then. Last fall, when she started the whole republican housewife thing, a bunch of that stuff got redacted out of her old posts. She must have spent entire days and nights removing all the damning details.

          • Re: paying her rent… I’m not so sure about that. She was sharing a tiny place with Krystal Kahler and one other girl, I think. A really small place, I think it wasin Murray Hill but I could be wrong (and don’t care to look up right now). I’d be willing to bet that her moving to NYC horrified him–he liked the idea of her as a 23 yr old side piece from far away, but most guys who cheat really wouldn’t want a crazed beast to move to their city and start demanding face time.

            Once he left his wife, they didn’t last long. Yet he still let her live in his place for a yr afterwards… so, yeah, her sob story really is a lot of smoke and mirrors. She moved for a man and that man gave her a lot of free rent, one way or the other.

          • Whatever, she lived for free with ex fiance she admitted she never wanted to marry and dumped him for married guy, then she dumped married guy for Michael, then she dumped Michael for Lodwick…notice a pattern? She’s a serial cheater and user. I will never believe she’s supported herself on her own for even a day.

  14. Now she is saying that it is career-related on her facebook:

    “Well, I don’t really have a choice right now (the move is career related) but I will be in SF LOTS!!!!”

  15. She’s like a lost girl trying – STILL – to find herself. Shouldn’t this have happened in her twenties? So sad. I mean, she doesn’t have a job/career, she isn’t good at anything….what’s she working towards? I don’t get it…she’s just floating around aimlesly…

    • The person in my life who has a serious personality disorder has a lot of money behind her. For her, it’s meant never having to get a job, which means she’s never had to be a functional adult, i.e. get up for work everyday, have normal interactions with coworkers and other people, be held accountable for her own behavior or get fired, etc. Not having to work has led her personality disorder to get majorly out of control.
      If Julia does have NPD or another mental illness, having her family’s money behind her is the WORST thing for her, at least in my anecdotal experience. If Julia had to work an office job, not be a narcissistic asshole to everyone she comes across, and be accountable for her own life choices and behavior or else get fired and live on the streets, she would be a lot better off.

    • Seriously. This behavior is annoying when practiced by someone in their early 20’s, but understandable. We’ve all been there, not knowing exactly what you want to do, where to live, or how to deal with relationships. It’s insufferable when seen in someone who damn well should know better.

      I must say, flitting around the country whenever someone with a peen takes interest in you is ridiculous behavior even for a young person still trying to find themselves. It makes me cringe in horror that she’s kept herself available to moving to any major US city for years and every time a boy is involved she thinks “Oooh, maybe here…” and acknowledges it publicly. This is beyond embarrassing. She never tries to make a life for herself, she’s always waiting for her next mark and trying to make herself into what he likes. Gross.

      • Love your name.

        And as a catman, let me say that soon after my matriculation to college, I met a girl who was Julia-ish (but so, so much smarter) in that she always chameleoned herself into whatever she thought the nearest guy would like, because she was insecure and she got off on the adulation. She figured out the components which comprise my special unicorn, and she mimicked them. It worked. Partially because I was 18. I was so ridiculously smitten.

        Bet it worked for 18 year old Julia, too. Well, guess what, Donkey? Like me, those guys whom you were able to infatuate 10+ years ago seem to have mostly grown up, and your scheme-juices have lost their potency, leaving your hissing man-hungry weasels unsated. When the fuck are you going to grow up?

  16. How can she be in a reality show about being a relationship advice person when nobody has ever taken her advice? One bit of reality TV I would like to see (Bravo production assistant – if you are reading) is the testimony of one living human being who has ever taken relationship advice from this woman. Her younger brother the Aspie even got married before she did and it can be hard for those folks y’know?

    Other stuff I would love to see on the show…..

    Julia joins the Groundlings
    Julia talking gang signs with the MS-13.
    Julia entertaining the trooops
    Julia’s guide to buying original rave wear.
    Peter Bogger’s attempts to delete the internet.
    and all the skeletons in the family closet ie the time Julias birthday party was cancelled; the Georgetown plagiarism, her mother ghost writing her “columns”… etc etc etc

  17. “I am, in so many ways, a New Yorker, with all that entails (good and bad!) and I can’t imagine not feeling that way.”

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! Wait, wait wait….HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (wipes tears from eyes) Oh, that’s a good one, honey…

    Okay, sorry. I will go read the rest of the post now.

    • “I am, in so many ways, a provincial Midwestern suburbanite, with all that entails (good and bad!) and I can’t imagine not feeling that way.”

      FTFW, Donkey

      • This has caused me to enter Catman of Introspection zone. I’ve concluded that one has great difficulty transgressing the boundaries imposed by one’s origins if one isn’t interested in, you know, learning shit.

        • Tis true.

          I would pay at least $10 to hear her try to articulate what is “NY” about herself. It would provide some serious laughs. Is it living in midtown? Hanging out in a 5 block radius of her apartment constantly and pretty much always? Taking cabs everywhere? Never going to Brooklyn? Only shopping at department stores? I can keep going.

          • Houston’s veggie burgers? Visiting museums/libraries solely for fauxto-shoots and not, god forbid, for any actual culture?

          • Yeah seriously. NEVER going to anything cultural. Never hanging out in Central Park even though she lives within walking distance. Always being amazed that there is traffic that will make her late to her flight during rush hour. Wearing inappropriate footwear that seemingly makes it impossible to walk anywhere.

            I think the New Yorkiest thing about her is that she is a bitch. But she came that way, so…

  18. Oh poor dear!!!! MOved all the way to big NYC with only TEN FUCKING GRAND in the bank!!!! How on earth did she fucking survive?

    FUCK YOU. Seriously. Oh how long before you squatted with your married ex for 2 years? I wonder how long that took. You probably ditched your “roommates” as well. I fucking hate her ass.

  19. Sometimes I get very sad because I must run errands all day and, to my great annoyance, the firewall of the company I run errands for will not allow me to comment. Only to read. Which is, I suppose, better than nothing. Of course I think of a great many things to say but, alas, by the time I get home at night, they’ve become irrelevant. Either someone else has said it or I feel the comments have moved on without me. I have missed being part of the conversation.

    I feel, however, that even though this is in the wrong thread, if I say nothing else ever again, I must assert my fervent hope that if RBD is ever in need of a lawyer as a result of their misdeeds and dastardly snarking, or in response to Peter Bugger cease and desists and midday calls from the Lawyer of Jackie Pancackes, Esq., that they retain the services of one Christopher Scott Badeau.

    And in closing, forsooth and herein and in perpetuity (because I plan to say this every day in my daily life) I second the advice he so sagely gives:

    GOVERN YOURSELVES ACCORDINGLY, MOTHERFUCKERS!*

    *MOTHERFUCKERS added by Licked Randi’s Cake.

    • I feel the same way about missing the conversations, LRC. It’s why most of my comments are photos. Like, I just got back last night from 5 days in the wilderness of Prince William Sound where I ALMOST DIED*, and there were over 1,000+ comments and 6+ posts to catch up on. Which is awesome in a way cause then I can spend a whole day “donking it up” as my BF likes to call it, but it’s hard to be part of the discussion when it moved on 3 days ago.

      So I resort to doing shit like this:
      [img]http://i.imgur.com/Iy1fs.jpg[/img]

      and this:
      [img]http://i.imgur.com/iNhBQ.gif[/img]

      *I didn’t really almost die, because I am a hardcore bitch and refuse to give nature the satisfaction. Fuck you, weather conditions! Fuck you, food poisoning! I will not be defeated by the pussy likes of YOU. Try harder next time.

        • Aw, sweet!

          It’s fine with me, as long as you stay over there and don’t hang out at my basement door with boxes of chocolates and macbook airs and dresses. I can’t deal with another suitor; my beating-them-off-with-a stick is all scuffed and my arm gets achy.

          • Oh, well then this is awkward.
            *scoops up boxes of chocolate, a macbook air and a couple pink dresses, slinks away from CUNTbunnies!’ basement door.

  20. Hey “journeygirl”, please stop calling yourself a “girl” and your meal tickets “boys”. You are 30 years old. Grow the fuck up.

  21. Moving “permanently” to LA = I have to pretend I live in LA for a reality show. I also have to pretend I have professional and personal life. Yoo hoo, guy I’m stalking in SF! I’ll be in SF a LOT, and it’s NOT just to stalk you, as far as you know.

  22. L.A. is going to EAT this bitch. She’s going to be in for a rude awakening when she realizes all the BluePrint cleanses, laxatives, trowels of makeup and hair extensions still won’t help her–which is saying something, since that city is known for a population obsessed with all of those things. She won’t be able to compete with the girls out there and it’s going to drive her cra-zy. I willing to bet Bravo is going to eat this up. They probably know that they’ll have an epic meltdown locked down for every episode.

    • She won’t be able to compete with the girls out there

      because she’s done so well competing against girls in ny, chicago, san francisco, pensacola, coronado…

      • She’s done pretty damn well competing against her female siblings!!! #1!!!!

    • She can’t even win at being embarrassingly superficial and appearance-obsessed!

      If I were directing her reality show, I would get Angelyne in to deliver the smackdown. Angelyne is the OG of “famous for being famous” and she does it with style and wit!

    • Eh, I see what you’re saying and I agree with you. I used to live in LA. Everyone there is either actually 15 years younger than you or saying they are. It really is just a much, much younger city than New York (or Chicago, where I live now).

      I doubt she’ll actually move to LA. But if she does, I can only imagine the lame neighborhood she’d choose.

      • Honestly, I like L.A. I enjoy myself whenever I get out there. You can find crappy people in NY, you just have to know where to look for the good guys wherever you are. I don’t think people there are any more or less good looking than people in NY, especially if they’re wealthy. I just think the lifestyle is a little more relaxed, so there’s more time to pay attention to stuff like appearance.
        She’s just a crappy person and totally manic, so no matter how relaxing her environment is (hello, ashram!) she’s always going to look like crap. And feel like crap.

      • Younger city? Really? Tell that to all the bars in Williamsburg where the average age is like 25.

        I’m sure LA is gonna eat her alive way worse than NY did though because everyone there is younger and more gorgeouser.

        • And I’ll start the LA/NY wars because I don’t care. I think she belongs in LA way more than she does in NYC.

          • Meh it seems like a fairly superficial place, she’s a superficial person chasing fame which I’m sure is common there, she seems to like hippy dippy new age-y faux spiritual crap, she probably would appreciate driving everywhere. I can go on. I’ts just every time moves to LA come up people chime in with LA IS GONNA EAT HER ALIVE!!!! Really? Worse than NY? I think she kinda seems perfect for LA in a lot of ways.

          • LA will eat her alive because she already has shitty plastic surgery and probably lacks the fundage to get replacement as far as the complete sham of work she has currently had done and/or attempts to correct the fuckery with her face. She’ll fit in with her starvation BPC diet and surgery obsession, but she won’t ever be up-to-par with the general population that actually attempts to get high quality surgeons for their work. She sucks on camera, so she’ll just be another busted face “actress-trying-to-get-work” in LA, which will serve to make her unhappy and subsequently more manic. She is no Angelyne. Also, being past her expiration date and having such a mentality won’t work in her favor in LA. Yeah, she sucked in NY, but that was a given and expected outcome even when she was doing the do in NY media circles. She will become depressed and super-whiny LIVING in LA where appearance and work are everything and she can’t afford to keep up… kind of like NY.

      • She’ll go for Weho, Beverly Hills or maybe Brentwood.
        Far outside shots for Santa Monica and Venice. Unlikely though.

        I’d really love to see the hijinks if she took Venice… those landlords are completely nutty by and large.

      • Haha. If RBD had a thumbs up/thumbs down feature for comments, the former should be “T&C! :)” while the latter should be “S&F. :(“

  23. Re: poll

    Not to be pedantic, but I’m not sure how accurate the wording is in the leading poll option: “‘I Was Inside.’ Using a Family Member’s Traumatic Experience To Win An Internet Argument”

    Did she really win? I think saying “…to try to win…” would better reflect reality, a place where Julia Allison sometimes vacations.

    Sincerely,
    TL;DR

    • LOL. Was thinking that too. She’s no longer a size 4, is the problem there, but don’t tell her blood circulation that.

  24. Just remember she’s always lying. Always. About every. little. goddam. thing. Always.

    Once you go in with that, everything makes a lot more sense.

  25. Also, when you run your cursor over it, it says “completedouche.” That is funny, like finding a snarky Easter egg.

      • I really hope these protests continue to grow and spread. This is exactly what this country needs.

        • I wouldn’t say it’s exactly what is needed, but it’s a start. If people (those of us who work, anyway) would bother to look at the raw deal we’ve been dealt over our lifetimes and where it’s gotten the country, it would be a fantastic start. There would be a chance for change and the people out there actually protesting would be largely responsible for getting the ball rolling. Let’s hope.

    • That is heartbreaking.

      In contrast:
      “My parents are Ivy League Educated professionals from upper middle class families.
      They paid for my full tuition at Georgetown.
      I was given every opportunity in the world.
      I received a no-strings-attached check for $10,000 upon graduation.
      I’m thirty years old and my family still pays all my bills, from food to travel to manicures and everything in between.
      I have never held a real job for longer than a few months. I have no desire to “run errands at a desk.”
      I have never had devastating health issues. I think it is cute to brag that I don’t have health insurance yet I have a doctor in four major cities.
      The biggest problems in my pitiless existence are being late for a plane, an eye infection, and being exhausted after traveling aimlessly around the country on my parents’ or male acquaintances’ dime.
      My name is Julia Allison and I am an asshole.”

  26. oookay, what the heck is a “journeygirl”? is that supposed to be a feminized (and infantilized) version of a journeyman? but journeyman is not actually a person who travels all the time??

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