Was Julie Albertson Raised in a Convent?


She finds cocks icky and she is just figuring out that the kids do drugs at music festivals. She is 30 fucking years old, and she is from a major urban centre. As for the pink cowboy boots, I can’t even. Piss off already, Rebecca of Sunnybrook Ranch.

This is my first time at a musical festival (yeah, I know, I’m lame); I tried to wear pink cowboy boots. Christine vetoed me.

Onstage at Skrillex #LOLLAPALOOZA! Me: Um, is everyone in the audience on drugs? Christine: Maybe!


    • She’d be the kind of girl who makes someone drive her to the hospital after smoking because she thinks she’s dying. Wouldn’t share my stash with her.

      • OK… tots not defending her. As a teen, more often than not, when I smoked the MaryofJane, I had horrific anxiety attacks. Like… seriously, “OMG!!!!! I’m dying!!!!!! TELLMYMOMILOVEHEREVENTHOGHI’MANANGRYTEEN!!” I guess I’m so not cool. I did love the alcohol and qwwwaaayyylooods and all kinds of, ‘whooooo… mellow…. zzzzz’, kind of stuff though. What’s w/ that??? Ugh. (so didn’t fit in bcause often became ‘paranoid’ after the blunt-ola. Sucked.) Anyway… what else ya’ got???? 🙂

        • Heh, same here. I once slept on the floor of my dorm room because I was paranoid I would fall out of bed and hurt myself during the night. The green is not for everyone…

          BUT, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a total stick in her ass. Imagine having sex with a dude but being all, “Don’t show me your weiner!!! I don’t like how they look!”

          Also, notice that she doesn’t like dick pics but has no problem with posting Greasy’s yoga boner in LA…Hmm. How long until “The Young One” walks among us?

        • Dude, DLM, you left chat before I could share this story, but this totally happened with brah! Except he was, like 37. You speak exact experience: rushing to hospital, him saying, “Did you call my mom?” Him getting misty and saying, “If… anything happens… I’m so glad I got to be with you, even for a short time…”

          They wheeled him into the back, gave him an Ativan, and came back to tease him about having dry mouth a little while later. About two hours in, we were giggling like idiots while the lady next to us was on a respirator and her elderly husband was like, “It’s okay, Gladys… hold on,” in a pathetically shaky voice. We felt like such assholes. Meanwhile, at some point, *I* got paranoid and became convinced the burly ass orderly in weird black sneakers was an undercover cop going to haul us to jail when we were leaving.

          To this day, dudebrah says, “MJ? That shit’ll kill ya.”

          • The first time I tried it I very nearly did end up in the hospital. My dumb ass was PMSing and feeling binge-y so I thought it would be a good idea to eat a whole tray of brownies even though it was my first time with MJ. I tried two, felt nothing and thought it wasn’t “working” but they tasted great so I kept eating. It wasn’t until I finished that eight brownie I started feeling it and was high for almost 24 hrs, freaking out the whole time. My chest was sore from the heart- pounding anxiety for days. After that I switched to joints. Binge eating and MJ don’t mix, do you hear that Donkey? No special cupcakes for you.

        • That happened to me, too! Even though I grew up in Santa Cruz, CA. “OMG, OMG! What am I gonna do — I’ll never be able to do algebra again! I am doomed!”

          That said, I agree with the general consensus: Donks would be so much better off if she availed herself of the miracles of modern chemistry, prescribed or otherwise. Even wine, boxed or otherwise, would help.

        • Yeah, but you were a kid! Most of JAB’s behavior would be comprehensible and acceptable from a kid. Alas, she is thirty.

    • Not to derail the conversation, but I have a question. I’ve smoked pot maybe three times and have never been high – maybe because I didn’t smoke enough, maybe because it takes a while for the body to adjust, whatever. I’d like to try again, but I am a very high-strung person (like, frequent full-on panic attacks), and I worry that pot may make me even more anxious and crazy. Should I just say no?

      • The first time I smoked pot, some twenty years ago, was fun (and funny) but I’ve found since then it either does nothing for me or makes me uncomfortably paranoid. Of course, it probably depends on the quality, my state of mind, who I’m with, or how much ive had to drink. I still generally accept it when offered but can totally live without it. I get anxiety and lose my appetite when I’m stressed out and friends, even a therapist, suggested pot might be helpful during these periods. But rolling joints, the paraphanelia, is too much work for me. I don’t really care for the smell of it either. A neighbor friend if mine grows it and smokes it all the time and his house really reeks even though it is a nice place. I guess if pot doesn’t do anything for you, there’s no reason to worry about missing out on anything.

        • It’s annoying that pot can be either the cure for anxiety or the source of even more anxiety, and there’s really no way to know until you’re actually high…

          • Agreed. As with Jordache, it was once fun for me, back in college. Not long into my pot-smoking tenure, it started making me uncomfortable if I was around other people. I preferred alcohol. Even in private, I don’t think pot helped me take the edge off.

            My current boycat, who suffers from anxiety, thinks otherwise. He smokes daily.

      • EG, it took a few tries for me too before I finally caught a buzz. If you anticipate that you’d be super paranoid but want to find out for sure, I’d suggest smoking w/ just a well-trusted friend, not in a crowd, until you know your reaction (the paranoia may feel less like paranoia & more like stupid-but-funny brain farts if you’re not self-conscious). It’s the next level of high that makes the first half worth it to me, when boring but necessary stuff becomes interesting enough to tackle, & when stuff that has bugged me becomes inconsequential.

        Cooking w/ it gives (me) more of an anesthesia-like effect, which is okay if long, hard sleep is on the agenda, Sometimes I’ll take a small chunk of bud somewhere w/me to just pop in the back of my cheek after I’ve decided a high fits but I can’t exactly burn one (it’s different from smoking or cooking it, not a strong high).

      • As a lifelong pot smoker, I really believe it depends on your state of mind when you’re smoking it and your surroundings. I rarely get paranoid but I did recently, and unexpectedly, when I smoked too much and went to a crowded concert and got separated from my man. I was stunned to find myself in a complete state of anxiety and near-total-freakout until I found him. I was shocked because that hadn’t happened to me in years, and had only ever happened once or twice and when shrooms were in the mix too.

        I also had to stop smoking entirely in the year after my marriage broke up because I was so depressed that it would only magnify the depression.

        Now I’m fine and smoking is back to being an enjoyable experience for me. But I am in a happy place and generally only smoke in the comfort of my own home or with people I am totally comfortable with. I think that’s the key.

        • That was my experience. My highs were filled with laughing and laughing and doing stupid, hysterical stuff. But that was only when I was with people I was really, really comfortable with. If I did it at parties or with people I didn’t know, I would freak out entirely. It was awful!! But I can drink anywhere. 🙂 I also noticed that if I had a buzz on from drinking and then I smoked, it didn’t seem to affect me in the paranoid way IDK… I haven’t smoked it in over 20 years now.

          • I recently tried it for the first time at age 38 with my husband. I think I did it 3 times before giving up on it because I felt nothing. I was trying it to see if it would help with my chronic pain. Not sure if I was immune to its effects because I already take pretty strong shit on a daily basis or not. Bummer!

          • Rosalie, honey, you need to come to CA so I can teach you how to inhale. That is what I find is the biggest thing new smokers have problems with — the natural inclination to close your throat against something invading it. If you aren’t coughing the first few times (or even in later times), you might be doin’ it wrong.

  1. Considering the amount of Adderall that people in her social circle consume – and the whispers about a certain barnyard animal who still seems to be sniffing a lot – you’d think she’d watch what the fuck she says.

    Don’t play innocent with me, Donkey. (I do believe that you’re grossed out by cocks, though, you frigid bitch.)

    • Adderall always makes my face and nose itchy, and makes me feel twitchy. Someone indeed seemed very twitchy and itchy the other day. Would also explain the weight loss. And the general misery. Oh dear, Donkey.

      • I wonder if a certain mule keeps a file on her iPhone that tracks how many sniffs and snorts she takes, like the one Julia Allison shows off that tracks each fucking SIP of alcohol she takes. Because non-addicted people totally do shit like that, right?

      • Not that it’s anything new for her, but it’d also explain some of the recent, late night manic posts.

        Wow, didn’t see this one coming. Julia Allison is developing/already has a drug problem. Yikes.

    • OK… is Adderall really awesome or something? I’ll tots order it from a legit pharmacy in China or India if it’s some awesome super-power stuff.

      • It’s not really FUN, but it makes you feel really productive and lose a lot of weight.

        It’s not really that hard to get a legit prescription from a doctor if you know anything about ADD symptoms. Not that I, uh, know from experience.

        • I’m jealous of all the people I know (on here and IRL) who have taken Adderall and say stuff like this. I have a legit ADHD diagnosis and take it as prescribed, and I’ve never gotten to feel that whole “crazy productivity I can totally write all of my papers and study all night now” thing. It just makes me feel…eh. Normal? I honestly don’t notice much of a difference in my productivity after I take it, actually. Boyfcat says he can always tell when I’ve forgotten to take it or decided to skip a day (and he’s always right) because I’m apparently more spacey and fidgety.

          Really though, I’m jealous 🙁 I wish it really helped like I thought it would when I was first diagnosed.

          (Oh, but the weight loss thing is totally true. Adderall’s a crazy appetite suppressant. When I first started taking it I legitimately forgot to eat some days, because I’m a very “Eat when I’m hungry, stop when I’m full” kind of eater, and I just never got hungry…so I never remembered to eat. I had to get used to forcing myself to eat at specified meal times. It was kinda nutso. So yeah, I totally buy that JA would be wanting to get her hands on it, even if just for that alone).

          • I take something else but its totally the same thing. There is no euphoria and I always decide it is doing nothing but my bf notices when I don’t take it and gets annoyed that I’m not concerned about the types of mistakes I make when I’m not on it (except I still am not much different when I am on it, I can read better and stay sitting longer thats about it).

            I hope ADHD is related to my low birth weight and my mothers poor health more than genetics because I won’t be able to handle children like I was/am.

          • I second that emotion. I have ADHD and my child’s dose of Adderall made me feel tots normal. No desire to clean house a la Ellen Burstyn in Requiem For a Dream.

            Alack, my new economy job offers no insurance and though it pays minimum wage (which i have to explain to the demons of Sallie Mae on a quarterly basis) it is just enough (as in ten bucks enough) to keep me ineligible for state subsidized health care.

            I very much miss Adderall. It would help my productivity at le job and le life. But sans insurance my options are travelling to Mexico or buying it from ASU students. Or marrying boyfcat for his wowza insurance benefits.

          • And to clear up–child’s dose= 5mg bid. When I first was diagnosed with ADHD in ’96 I was prescribed 70mg a day and could quite soon shop in the children’s dept of Old Navy.

          • AND because I’m tots about this thread, Live Dependently, I was LBW too.

            I often wondered if that is part of it.

          • So Blessed – Was your Adderall covered by insurance? Mine isn’t and they say it can’t be because it’s Schedule II (at least, I thought that’s what they said…)

            I get the generic from Walmart or Target, it’s about $30/month. The generic Ritalin is actually only $4, but I didn’t have a great reaction to it. If you respond well to Ritalin, that might be a budget-friendly option?

          • Also, I’m going to go into psych grad student mode for a moment (since… that’s what I am). The paradoxical thing about Adderall (or Ritalin, etc.) is that they make people who don’t have ADHD have…the reaction that people stereotypically associate with those meds (including mania), but people who do have it should never respond that way, and should actually calm down (hence why it’s used as a medication). Professors in the field have even said that it’s actually the quickest way to really diagnose or know if someone truly has ADHD – if they calm down or seem “normal,” they probably actually have it. If they get manic, super-productive, etc., then nope.

            As a side note, I had actually long suspected that I had issues with ADHD, but didn’t get diagnosed until last year (at 22). Even when I received the diagnosis, I still don’t know if I fully believed it – part of me thought he was making a mistake or something, I don’t know. But when I first took the meds and realized I didn’t experience any of that productivity surge/mania/etc. that I’d always heard people talk about, that’s when it really sunk in and hit me that this was something I actually had. It was a weird, oddly hard moment.

          • SOP-yes, my Adderall (and it was the generic) was covered by insurance–Ritalin doesn’t work for me. Some formulations of generic Adderall didn’t work either I had asked my doc to let me try Vyvanse (sp?) but as I always had a good response to plain ol’ amphetamine salts he kept me with that.

            Odd that your insurance won’t cover Schedule II. They ARE tricky about adult ADD, tho.

            Thank you for the suggestion. The problems are affording 4x a year visits out of pocket and the necessary bloodwork and now that I’m expired, EKGs, etc.

            My doctor back East was much less nervous about prescribing Adderall–I had taken (and failed/passed the Conners test and am markedly improved when taking it regularly) but when I moved out here I found, despite my decade-long response to low doses of the med, that most docs are loath to prescribe it.

            My thoughts are–um, I’m in the desert, and if I were looking for stimulants I’m sure I could quite easily find a trailerful of methamphetamine.

            So it goes.

          • SB – The insurance thing may just be because I’m using my graduate student health insurance. So maybe it’s just that the university won’t cover it… the plan is pretty good, but they can be weird about some things.

          • Side of Pancakes: You know what’s weird? I knew a guy with obviously undiagnosed ADD — he just would never shut the fuck up, couldn’t concentrate on anything, manic, lack of ability to focus, etc., all the time. But when he did coke, he totally calmed down, became serene, listened to people, could concentrate, all in all became a much nicer person. He is the only person I ever knew who became far more bearable after doing lines.

          • Jacy – That’s really interesting. I know that amphetamine does not = all stimulants, but I’ve said for a while that one of my earliest “you should probably be diagnosed clues” actually should have been that my entire life, I’ve always calmed down after drinking coffee. My issue was hyperactivity more than attention-deficit/spaciness; my baseline energy state was borderline manic, especially when I was younger, and I had a lot of trouble with my friendships in middle/high school (I was a lot to deal with at times, always jumping around and singing/yelling/talking and not a very good listener), but the friends I did retain in HS always joked that they’d give me coffee whenever they wanted me to calm down. Anyway, I’m not really great with pharmacology so I don’t know the exact mechanisms, but I think it’s something along the lines of…stimulants work on the prefrontal cortex (brain region involved in executive functioning, planning, regulating social behavior, decision-making, self-control, etc.), which has deficits in ADHD people; so in “normal” people stimulants make them manic and overactive, but in ADHD people it is stimulating an area that amps up regulation and planning and is naturally impaired, which ends up making people calmer (e.g. better at self-regulation, etc.) as a result.

            TL;DR : I totally believe what you’re saying about the coke. I bet it’s really a thing. Not sure if caffeine can really be considered similar to amphetamines in terms of the “paradoxical effect,” but I wouldn’t be surprised.

          • Also, I’m so sorry I’ve gotten up on a soapbox here. But there’s been some speculation that JA is ADHD around these parts. I don’t totally believe it, nor do I not believe it. Honestly, I’ve been following the show for a while, but I still don’t feel like I know her well enough to really…know. I’d believe it, but I’d also believe she’s just a narcissist.

            Anyway, if she does actually have ADHD, one of the saddest things to me is her insistence on refusing to regularly exercise (excepting, of course, the 5 sessions with OMGBODYFITTRAINER and the 1 day of that shape-up challenge). I never exercised or played sports as a kid because I wasn’t naturally good at it, so I gave up. In the past 2 years I’ve gotten INCREDIBLY into sports & exercise; I work out about an hour every day, my boyfcat and I regularly do active stuff together (like run, kayak, etc.), and I can’t imagine it *not* being a part of my daily routine at this point. Putting aside the regular benefits people know about (weight loss, general fitness, blah blah), it did a *phenomenal* job of acting like a natural ADHD med – I credit my daily exercise almost as much as I credit my meds with any improvements I’ve made in terms of emotion regulation, calming down, focusing, being a better listener, etc. Seriously, it works like a blessing. It’s a shame she doesn’t realize that.

          • I am not sure she has ADD but we have heard many rumors from many people over the years that she and Meghannaise use Adderall for weight-control reasons.

            And I totally agree with you re: exercise. It is a natural anti-depressant/anti-anxiety medication.

          • This thread is so long I can’t keep track of what I’m replying to but I wanted to say I saw a psychiatrist who specializes in adult ADHD and is co-authoring a book with another doctor from Harvard and he says some studies point to LBW having a strong correlation (although genetics do too).

            Also, the psychiatrist I see now won’t give medication for people who won’t exercise, you have to be trying and not just looking for a quick fix. He works at a school and gets a lot of “sudden ADHD”.

      • It’s not super awesome for me, it just lets me get shit done at work, but that’s because I actually have ADHD.

  2. Adderall always makes my face and nose itchy, and makes me feel twitchy

    Go vacuum; that’s just the cat hair.

  3. The whole *TWEEEEEE I’m so adorable and uncorrupted and innocent!!!* act gets inappropriate by age 25. At 30, you’re supposed to have interesting life experiences. To have not even gone to a music festival is fucking retarded.

    • What’s idiotic is that she’s been to SXSW during the music portion and she dated JAKE FUCKING LODWICK, who isn’t exactly secretive about his drug use. As with everything this dumb cunt does, it’s a total act. She’s one of the most corrupt assholes around – she just doesn’t like to drink because it makes her lose control. Sugar, fat, other people’s money (especially men’s) and certain other substances are more to her liking. But she is no innocent, that’s for damn sure.

    • She’s a sheltered idiot. If it weren’t for the family money she depends on, she’d be a homeless sheltered idiot.

      • I dunno. I’ve mentioned this before, but if it wasn’t for the money and it’s ability to insulate her from mistakes and also to create high expectations, she would probably be a well adjusted walmart cashier.
        I think how the money has been applied has saved her as much as it has destroyed her.

  4. Was Julie Albertson Raised in a Convent?

    She may want a certain Italo-American Hawt Founder to think so…

  5. OT: Does anyone here happen to watch “Four Weddings”? I’m home on a Friday night procrastinating an assignment so of course I’m going to watch awful TLC programming, and one of the brides on tonight’s episode was like a weird, religious version of JA. Down to the cupcake obsession, Cinderella fantasy wedding, and overall bitchiness. Plus she was a 38 year old spackle face marrying a sad looking 25 year old.

    I just say.

  6. OH HAY GUYZ. I have a question that’s off-topic.

    The other day, Julia posted a quote from a cab driver (which included the exact language the cab driver used) and people called her out on here for being racist. Today, I had a funny experience with a cab driver and I was thinking of tweeting the quote. But IS that racist? And if so, why? I’m not trying to be an ignorant slob, I’m just genuinely curious as to why/whether this would be racist or offensive.

    Thanks 🙂

    • It was the fact that she wrote it in his semi-broken English that people took offence to. It wasn’t necessary and was weird.

      • I rode with a cabdriver today who said, “Every day, we just do the best we can with what we’re given.” A universal sentiment; we were in total agreement. Were I to tweet (were I a tweeter) to my ten dozens of followers the driver’s declaration as, “Ev’vy day, we jus’ do the best we can wit what we given,” it would nullify the shared experience, and reveal me as an asshole. But for Donkey, style trumps substance every time, since she has no substance herself. (And no style, but that’s another essay topic.)

    • Is the funny experience only funny because of his accent or cultural background? If so, that’s kind of racist. If not, you’re cool.

      • Somewhat guilty admission time: I teach ELD, and sometimes my students say really funny things, and I will tweet it. They go nuts from excitement that they were “twittered!”

        It is not a common thing, and it usually comes from us having a cultural discussion of some kind. Things teens say is kind of hilarious anyway, but these kids happily tease me about ‘what white people do,’ and it makes for some pretty funny comments.

        Some people might find them offensive, but we have a very accepting and open classroom, and sometimes they are trying to figure out ‘my culture’ and also teach me about theirs. I think it is adorable.

        • This is sort of OT, but April Winchell at Regretsy just wrote a really thought-provoking post (here: http://www.regretsy.com/2011/08/05/faux-bos-and-faux-pas/) about how much context matters on the internet with regards to whether something is offensive or not. She basically means that even though you can make a joke in a totally loving way (in her case, gently making fun of Chaz Bono in a way that a lot of people took as transphobic), you can’t expect random people on the internet to know that you’re not some bigot, because they don’t know you personally. When you see someone face-to-face you can usually tell whether they mean a joke to hurt or to gently poke fun, but online it’s just anonymous words on a screen.

          As an in-jokey thing like what you have with your students, the context is clear to you and to them and hopefully to your twitter followers, too. In Julia’s taxi driver case, she’s just making fun of the speech of some friendly old guy who she has absolutely no relationship with except he drove her somewhere. The sad thing is that knowing her “context” doesn’t make her seem like any less of an asshole.

    • Because it wasn’t ” the exact language the cab driver used”. It was her written transcription of his verbal utterance filtered through her own superiority complex and vicious class awareness. Written words and spoken language are inherently different things. The reason it struck us as obnoxious was because she was lamely, dreadfully trying to make a comic point that hinged on the driver’s “funny” accent and poor English. I am not saying it was “racist or offensive”. I’m not a delicate PC flower. I AM saying it was a form of condescending mockery from a stupid shallow and uncultured stuck-up bitch towards a hard-working immigrant. She was totally looking down on him, his job, his accent.

      Also note that her funny-talking cab driver was sort of complimenting her on the “sexy times” she will have or somesuch- such a pretty lady as yooose!

      So “lolz”, feel free to transcribe funny foreign accents in pidgin text for your chums for laffs if you care to do so. I am STRONGLY suspicious that you are Julia herself here- that name and “innocuous” question about what Julia did wrong there. Hope that get helped! 🙂

      • I think this is her ‘improv’ at work. She is being FUNNY! But really, more than anything, she was saying what you said toward the end:
        Also note that her funny-talking cab driver was sort of complimenting her on the “sexy times” she will have or somesuch- such a pretty lady as yooose!

        The last time I remember her talking about a cabdriver was when she was in Vegas at one point (I think it was the firefox costume trip?), and she said the driver asked if he should take to her to back entrance. OMG Y’ALL, SHE IS SO SEXXXXXY, SHE COULD BE A STRIPPER!

        Totally unrelated, but my best SF cabdriver experience was when I was super high on hallucinogens leaving a warehouse party, and somehow managed to carry on an extensive, cohesive discussion about Middle Eastern affairs with this brilliant, well-traveled man who was driving us around in a cab because he — with his now useless doctorate — had been forced to flee his country. Was he a little hard to understand at moments? Sure — he had lived all over the world, and had an accent to reflect it. Regardless, we carried on a perfectly lovely conversation (despite me being distracted by streetlights refracting in rain puddles) where I left feeling so ‘ineffably’ humble about the world we live in, and those brief encounters with truly wise and experienced people.

        That was just my BEST SF cab driver experience (my best Seattle one is a fun story, too). SF cab drivers are some of the coolest motherfuckers in the world, and live more in a day than she does in a lifetime. She will never know that, though, because she probably spends the whole ride talking about herself, and the only thing she takes away from it is if they say how pretty they think she is.

        • I love, love your finely written account of your SF cabbie, McCakes. You speak true and wise, like a lot of cabbies do, actually. One can learn a lot.

          My most memorable taxi encounter was in Manhattan, very shortly after 9/11. It was late, my driver was Sikh (which is not Muslim), turban and all. And he was telling me about the abuse and insults, people spitting and throwing things at him, he had gotten from pedestrians who must’ve been goombahs from out of town. No real NYer would do that. Anyway at my stop we talked for what seemed like a half-hour, probably far less though. A lot of these sorts of conversations happened in NYC after 9/11. The poor guy was so weary and stressed and sad about it. We both teared up a bit (I’m a guy) talking about the great city, and What Happened. I doubt his job was easy before it Happened, but the abuse he received by fools was so unjust, unfair. His sorrow was sincere, and I won’t ever forget that conversation, that December. A snapshot of life at a very unusual time.

          • Norse, your story was touching. I’m sure the driver also has a fond memory of that night.

            I lived in India for awhile, and the number of Sikh people, particularly in Amritsar (on the border of Pakistan), I encountered who offered up, “We are not Muslim!!” was astounding. The fact we were American was very obvious and it made me so uncomfortable that anyone felt the need to qualify themselves as such. Unfortunately, it was well publicized/understood at the time that Americans equate Muslim with Terrorist.

            I’m an East Coaster residing on the West Coast, and finding certain “good” foods is difficult (beyond Mexican, sushi, etc). So, on a totally selfish note, can I just state that when talking to my cab drivers, if they happen to be from another country, I ALWAYS ask them their fav local restaurant for their country’s food. I have found some of the most amazing places based off of that: Mandarin, Keralan, Northern Indian, Afghani, Himalayan, Ecuadorian, Ethiopian, Kenyan – as of now! (I’ve also had quite a few offers to eat the real deal at their homes, but haven’t taken anyone up on that yet – I’m still a skeptical New Yorker, after all 😉 )

          • Norse–I love that story. Those few months post-9/11 were a really unique time in NYC. Thanks for sharing.

        • The most interesting people I have met in my life, with the most amazing stories of how they got to be where they are, have come from cab drivers.

    • First of all, I’m not Julia. I just can’t think of a better name than lolz because it seems like all of the good ones are taken!

      Anyway, the problem is that I was going to quote it in broken english. :-/

      I was on my way to a RLY IMP exam this morning and I told the cab driver I was nervous. He said, “Nahhhhh, you gonna be fine! I can tell–you have smart woman in your face!” We both laughed and he put me at ease for the ride, and he was just a really sweet guy. If I were to fix his english in the quote, it would seem silly. If I went to another country, and someone quoted my speaking because the way I use their language is funny sometimes, I wouldn’t be offended. But…NorseHorse’s comment about class awareness and such scares me because I don’t feel that way at all and I’d rather keep my mouth shut than possibly offend someone when it comes to such a sensitive issue.

      • Hey Lolz, sorry for my suspish there.. silly because she never reads here!

        Ultimately she was offensive because she’s Donkey- we know where she was coming from with that. Your story there is fine, kind of nice. Hope your exam went well. 🙂

  7. I don’t understand why she would go on a sex show and be horrified by sex? She has no idea because she’s never had a real sexual relationship.

    And as I recall SWSX was her first outdoor music experience. She has spent her entire life chasing Big City experiences. So now when she is desperate for exposure she thinks she can play catchup? No. She is an idiot with no cultural references.

  8. [img]http://thebestpictureproject.files.wordpress.com/2011/03/soundofmusic1.jpg[/img]


    CUNTBunnies, work your magic.

      • She was going to wear bubblegum pink cowboy boots with that way too small crotch duster dress and massive white purse?
        To quote JABa herself: “oy”.

        • Her arms… they are gigantic.

          Also, who brings a giant purse to a concert? How do you dance? She truly is my 53 year old aunt.

          • I actually don’t think her arms look gigantic. I think she is looking a bit fit for a change but you know she’ll pack the lbs right back on.

          • Heh, you’re worried about the purse. She took DAD$ER to the concert. Yep, friend talked her out of the pink boots but didn’t talk her out of Date Night w/ Dad$er.

          • Her arms are definitely soft. And her face is huge, but that’s probably injections not fat.

            Also, her friend’s hand looks like it’s on backwards. What the hell is going on in this picture?

        • Are you saying that Pierce “Dr. Bodyfit Labs” Whatshisface isn’t making breakthroughs? Our Burro has done ~5 training sessions! She’s a serious athlete now!!

          • It’s as if Cuntbunnies has worked her magic and made Julia’s legs peek out of the arm holes of that dress.

        • She has the weirdest body ever. Small waist, not very big ass contrary to her assertions, then big arms and legs that do not seem to match the rest of her body. Tragic shape really.

  9. She brought her dad to Lollapalooza and they saw Coldplay.

    I know Lolla isn’t the hippest music festival out there anyway, but wow.

    • What are they all doing there anyways? Is Julia working it for the queue? Maybe dadsers firm got passes… Anyways seems pointless.

      • Looks like her new bestest BFF ever works in the music industry and has hook ups. So, now Donkey is pretending to love music.

    • She also apparently felt nostalgic after hearing “Yellow” which has to be one of the most overplayed songs of all time. She tweeted about it bringing back her memories of 2000. You’re not eighteen or a college freshman anymore, Donkey. Let it go.

      Also, taking your dad with you to see Coldplay, especially at Lollapalooza, is just weird. Hanging out with your dad is always ok, but my dad and I have our bonding nights when we go watch boxing matches or comedy shows, but Coldplay? Awkward.

      • I’m convinced that those most overcome by nostalgia are the ones least satisfied by their present.

        Maybe it’s because I just saw Midnight in Paris.

        • Yes! Awesome movie.

          And I saw it after reading a comment on here where someone compared Ines to JA, so I couldn’t NOT see the comparison the entire time. Especially with the love for faux-intellectualism. Perfection.

    • “She brought her dad to Lollapalooza and they saw Coldplay.”

      That’s honestly maybe the saddest fucking thing I have ever read.

  10. So, I’ve been catching up on my Donkology after being away for awhile, so I know this is old news to you all, but I have to say it.

    To an actual wedding between two humans and thought she looked good! She looks like a Toddlers and Tiaras contestant. How did the other wedding guests NOT strap her down and drag her to the nearest mental hospital kicking and screaming? I said it before, but I’ll say it again
    Donkey: Lost her mind and not missing it

    • But it was in Montana! That was the theme of the wedding! She loves theme weddings!


  11. her habit of adding an explanatory note to every relationship is just grating – my high school bf Dan, my high school lunch partner Ellie, my high school debate partner Boris, my grade school jump rope partner Natasha.

    The people who are meaningful in your life should be introduced as people first – then you can add your relationship after if you can’t help yourself. These people don’t exist or come into being only through their relationship to you Donkey – Dan is Dan, end stop.

    • Why not just “my friend Dan,” particularly given he’s getting married? Kind of rude, isn’t it, and disrespectful to the bride to constantly be harping on the fact that he is Donkey’s ex-high school sweetheart. We know, idiot. Let it go. Everyone else has.

      • This. Also, adding the backstory is an indirect way of talking about herself some more.

      • RIGHT! How appaling! I bet Dan’s fiance hates her. I can’t believe she posted a photo of him on twitter along with referring to him as a high school ex. All kinds of crazy.

    • “High school” was half your lifetime ago, expired idiot Donk. Let it go, and feel free to relax.

  12. Then she must have had the same costume in NY because the location is the place where the bravo party and her bicoastal birthday bash was. I recognize the sculture, the furniture and the staircase. I know its creepy that i recognize it but i do.

      • she had to have changed into that costume there at one of those times she was there or looking at the place. I know the location like the back of my hand…! The stairs are the IMI club on fifth and 58th I swear! that pic is new york. I will send you a pic of it….

        • She didn’t HAVE that costume until the day before Halloween 2009. You. Are. Wrong.

        • Bob, I think the place must bear a striking resemblance to the other place, but that photo is def. the same night she was hanging with Shira in LA.



          • wow that is so weird. I give in. It looks exactly the same as the club in New york. you are right Jacy… So sad,,, so stupid, so fat, so full of hair balls…(slinks off into the basement, opens the subceller trap and gives himself 5 hours of solitary confinement),

          • That picture might make me cry in terror, if I had any emotions left.

      • OT but Shira is someone who has really helped Codename TK’s “other girlfriend’s” career the last few years. They are tight now. I always wondered who in Donkey’s circle told Toph’s real girlfriend that he was seeing a donkey behind her back.

        We always heard it was the Twitter stream but WHO directed her to the Twitter stream?

      • Her face is so majorly busted since that 2007 b-day bash. She really f-ed herself up.

        • This was in reply to that Gawker link. So sorry, so fat.

          Still, damn… she used to be so pretty.

          • She really did. She basically peaked at 26-27, then started messing with her face and never sleeping. And the sad thing is, stupid Donkey was so wrong about 30 being the expiration date — most women I know are way more beautiful in their 30s than their 20s, and she would have been too. But no.

    • Bob, baby. I love you, you know this… the one up top is pink, though, and she posted it during her LA Halloween bender. Remember, when she threw a big fit because she wouldn’t get to wear a Care Bear costume and she begged her loyal readers to make one for her in 12 hours because she ‘refuses to wear a store bought costume’? Remember? Come on Bob, I have faith in you!

      Some writer dude tweeted that he saw her crying in a corner at some party in LA?

      There is a video of her at a party with Shira and they start talking to this dude dressed as Han Solo, and it turns out he is the host and they just crashed the party and she says, “Awkward,” as she shuts off the video?

      Then she got shit faced and implied she deflowered a freshman at Harvard in the back of a car, along with a bunch of other drunken, ‘I LOVE BEING DRUNK!” tweets that you expect from a 16 year old, not a 28 year old woman?

      Ringing any bells?

      Wow. I know WAY too much about that costume.

      • I am so adamant that the pic is NY not because of the outfit but because of the surroundings and furniture,,,and staircase… I have been to that place at least 40 times….. All i am saying is that she took a picture there in that same outfit!..

        • I think the answer is that someone used the same designer/architect and/or the design is eerily similar. That picture was taken in L.A. on Halloween, 2009.

        • As I noted above, maybe the answer is that CDBob observed a Private Donkey Dance … it would follow that she would ASSume that that’s why she didn’t have to pay him back for his investment in the B’day Bash.

          Jessica Fletcher, here, at your service.

      • If you apply to be her slave, I mean intern, maybe she’ll send you the (unlaundered) costume at the end of the summer?

    • NOOOO! We are internet trolls! Being right online is all we have! We must be proven irrefutably right!!!11!!!!

      J/K Kisses CDB. So sorry. So fat.

  13. i know this was already addressed, but why OH WHY does she have to refer to dan as “my amazing friend & beloved high school bf (we met at 14!)” at his ENGAGEMENT PARTY? MY… BELOVED… WE MET… it’s all about her! it never fails to amaze me. honestly i’ve never known or had a julia in my life, so it freaks me out that people like her actually exist and can keep up this level of NPD. i would be so pissed if i were the fiancee. not out of jealousy, but more out of proper decorum.

    my huscat (before he was my huscat) had an ex he’d been together with for 4 years. it was a very serious relationship and it ended amicably. we would sometimes socialize with her and her new beau. she was such a sweet person and never ONCE did she play the ex-girlfriend card with me. she was so respectful of our relationship, never even alluding to the fact that they had a history.

    on the flip side, the week we got back from our honeymoon, we attended the wedding of another ex of his… she was completely messy wasted and she fell all over me telling me how romantic my huscat was and how being with him was like a fairytale, and she hoped it was the same for me. omg, i was cracking up and felt sorry for her. who wants to feel that way about someone besides their groom at their own wedding?

    anyhow, this is how jools will always live her life. namedropping and having to prove how important she is in people’s lives. it’s pathetic and sad.

    • p.s. the ballerina costume pics are some of my all-time faves. she really thought she looked terrific and loved spending the night contorting herself into “graceful” poses and playing the part. the black tutu was the only nod to halloween. she thought it was so edgy.


    • That tweet really pisses me off. Poor Dan will always have the stigma of being her high school bf. I barely even remember whom I dated in high school and that poor guy will have to hear it even on his engagement and I’m sure wedding.

  14. Umm, this is news to me… JA was boning Sean Parker (a Facedouche) around the same time she was a Beer Can douching from Greasy, and about to meet the love of her three visits Jack?

  15. JuliaAllison: I’ve never tried dating a musician. I feel like I might be missing out!

    Whaaaa? Donkey twitter-stalked the eff outta John Mayer trying to get noticed.

    • She’s just dreaming of someone writing a song called “Julia”. Her ego couldn’t handle a musician because it would be way NOT about her.

      Plus I don’t think she actually gets music at all.

        • I’d say the answer is pretty obvious: Donk doesn’t feel threatened by her so there’s no need to be all PA “OMG You are SOOO tiny and cute!! We could be sisters!”

    • So she’s in their wedding and they are not fb friends? I bet donk also has friended her and been denied or unfriended. *that was alot of ‘friend’ for me to write in one statement. damn you, facebook.

  16. I love this comment under a typical lame picture with her fugly pink boots. She’s all “good question” but doesn’t answer it and how the hell do you not know if your boots are not leather?! I also like how Julia fucking Allison caused that commenter to stop eating meat, come on!

    onederkatie8 hours ago
    serious question, how do you reconcile your choices to purchase and wear leather with your commitment to not eating (non fish) meat? when I stopped eating animals a couple years ago, after reading the JSF book you have posted quotes from on your blog, I realized I didn’t feel comfortable purchasing products made from animal hide either. what are your thoughts on this?

    juliaallison2 hours agoin reply to onederkatie
    I don’t know if these are leather or not … They were pretty inexpensive! But yeah, I think that’s a great issue to debate. I guess in addition to not eating meat, I just consume as few animal products as possible.

    • “I guess in addition to not eating meat, I just consume as few animal products as possible.” Really, cause you just said you don’t know what your boots are made of. “As few as possible” would suggest you have some kind of active conscious about it and put in effort to minimize your animal product consumption. I think what you really mean, Julia Baugher, is that you just do not give a shit.

      • Sorry to reply to myself, but thinking about it more – I would respect her so much more if she would just say “I don’t really care about wearing leather.” Maybe that’s inconsistent with her vegetarianism, but at least it’s honest. And also, it doesn’t have to be inconsistent. There are lots of reasons one could choose not to eat meat that don’t apply to wearing it. Plus who says you even need a reason, per se. Just do what you feel like and own your decisions. It’s this ingenue, posturing bullshit that really get me. How has she not figured out, at 30 years old, that she just needs to be upfront about shit?

        • Or she could just admit that she’s not a vegetarian (or pescatarian or anything else). She generally avoids red meat for dietary reasons. There’s nothing wrong with that in and of itself it’s the fact that she insists that she’s something that she’s not that’s so offensive. Someone who is vegetarian for moral reasons would avoid all clothing made from animal skins. Someone who avoids red meat for dietary reason probably wouldn’t.
          Gawww, she always manages to screw everything up to make herself look as bad as possible.

          • Agree – if it was for dietary reasons, it would be understandable. She can never pick a platform, she is always somewhere odd in the middle of every statement she does.

    • To be fair, I don’t think the commenter is saying he/she stopped eating meat because of JA; I actually think the commenter is just pointing out the persuasive power of that “Eating Animals” Foer book (I know a lot of people were really turned off of meat from it…which is why I refuse to read it!)

      I read the comment more as noting that after the commenter happened to read that same book that JA vommed out quotes from all over her blog, he/she was lead to feel uncomfortable with any animal consumption, not just dietary. If anything, I think the commenter seems to be pointing out how disingenuous JA is, claiming to be SO TOTALLY IMPACTED by that book and putting up quotes all over the place, yet ignoring what I’m gathering might be an important point JSF made about leather or something. But YMMV.

    • KEY TO THE Q&A IS: “…your choices to purchase and wear leather…”

      Those $50 pink boots w/ rubber soles are not leather, did anyone seriously think they were? Donkey side-hooves the recently debuted leather belt stolen from FlapJack — if Julia Allison wasn’t lying out her raftass & through her chiclet teeth about being a supporter of animal humanity, then she’d ship the stolen leather belt back to him.

      • http://www.sheplers.com/sheplers-by-ow-womens-hot-pink-corona-leather-cowgirl-boots.html#readreview

        Actually, they are, as confirmed by a cursory peek at the page she herself linked. Leather does not equal expensive. In fact, the industrial farming complex JSF criticizes in his book are what have generated cheap prices – and fucking awful conditions – for the animals who provide skin suits.

        The FIRST thing I look at when I pick up a pair of shoes is the material. This is why I mostly stick to canvas shoes.

        God she is a cunt.

          • Brayella — Like I said elsewhere, I remember making a mental note when she linked them, because it always irritates me when she wears/buys leather. I wouldn’t have believed it myself — for as cheap an costume-y as they look — if I hadn’t been disgusted about it at the time.

    • My fucking head is going to explode over this.

      FUCKING EXPLODE. As a candidate (did I graduate yet? I can never tell) for a PhDonk in “Julia cares about AMINALS except her dog or ones that look really good on her feet/arm and impress awesome cute boys…” my FUCKING HEAD

      is going



      I need size eleventy font for this. And blingies. And a fucking marching band playing that classic of modern music “Fuck off and Die” by greenday, while waving a banner that says “YOU’RE A CUNT.”

      Unfortunately, I have to be somewhere in twenty minutes, so I will have to go, with my fucking head exploding, and try and keep it — along with my spewing vitriol — from the nice people who will be surrounding me. “Yes, it is vintage, thank you YOU DUMB FUCKING CUNT DON’T YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HOW ANYTHING IS MADE FUCK!?!”

      Quick run down:
      She wears and ogles leather constantly, especially shoes.
      She sometimes ogles fur, and feathers.
      She knows fuck all about the conditions in which her shit is made.
      She uses make-up and beauty products that use animal testing.
      She bragged about these shoes being leather when she bought them. I know, because I had a fit.


      There is more… so… so fucking much more…

      I am ten minutes late. FUCKITY FUCK FUCK.

      • Also: marshmallows.

        Also ‘as much as possible’? It is ALWAYS possible if you lead a conscientious life.


    • I have never seen non-leather cowboy boots. And she doesn’t give a shit about animals. All she cares about is her eating disorder.

      • JP, just google “fake leather cowboy boots”, they’re everywhere. Earlier this year I shopped the hell out of pink cowboy boots for a young female family member & the price range Donkey alludes to having spent is what the fakes generally run in.

      • $50 cowboy boots that look like something from a child’s dressup kit are almost certainly pleather.

      • I guess as a young buck from Texas, the thought of non-leather cowboy boots just insults me. Like, to my core.

  17. OT: Julia posts on Pancake’s FB wall sandwiched between posts from his GF:
    “Thought of you. Keep that helo in the air, babe!”
    (with link to story – Afghanistan helicopter crash kills 31 US troops including 25 Seals)


    • I’m more offended how flippant she is about the whole situation. She is such a bitch. And calling him “Babe” is just marking her territory. He’ll unfriend her soon enough.

    • that was a horribly inappropriate article to post… i dont care if it was between posts from his gf or what.. That is a sad article and should not be mixed with such lines as ” keep that helo in the air, babe” .. its serious article.. and Its nothing to take lightly and i find it disrespectful. Especially since, close calls happen even in training. i can guarantee … that if this is her attempt at inciting some sort of jealousy with the new gf.. its not going to work. But then again fine maybe it isnt, maybe she just really did think of him and want to say a quick hi.. no alternative motives.. i dont know her well enough to say..

      • Agree 100%

        Reasons like this is why I have said in the past I never felt bad for Julia or sympathized with her. She is a hateful, narcisstic dirtbag.

        How could anyone post that type of a comment with that sad newsstory?! And she was likely just trying to get his or his gf’s attention. What kind of a psychopath would also publicly refer to an ex bf (that dumped her no less) as “babe” especially when he is in another relationship. And she wonders why she has a hate site.

        • and to post the article in a manner that suggests he didn’t know about it – I’m sure Jack is going to be pretty abreast with helo happenings and doesn’t need a 12 hour delayed link to inform him of war tragedies. What. A. Tool.

    • That is gross. She’ll use anything to stay in touch. If I were him, I would have found that offensive. She really is a dumb, tone-deaf tool.

      • Also, the fucking Chinook got shot down by Taliban rocket launchers — it wasn’t some kind of pilot error. So it’s completely irrelevant unless Pancakes is currently flying choppers in a war zone, and last time I checked San Diego did not have insurgents firing at him from the hills. What a stupid tool.

    • As if he’s been unaware up until now & he needed a link, really?

      I’m not offended for FlapJack & his new Cute & Tiny™ GF’s sake, per se … I mean c’mon, it’s not as if they don’t expect to see Donkey hiking her backleg & pissing herself in public while trying to mark old territory.

      It’s family & friends of the deceased troops who I flinched for when reading Donkey’s besmirching comment — it’s not as if someone was not trying like hell to keep that bird up in the air as they were being shot down.

        • his job is dangerous and will only become moreso. it’s the same as sending a cancer patient an article about someone succumbing to cancer and saying “gee, i hope you don’t die!”

          the alternative to “keeping that helo” in the air isn’t a splinter, it’s DEATH.

  18. Also, is it just me, but I don’t see Pancakes on her friends list anymore, nor do I see Pancakes on Taylor’s friends list. Did he defriend them both?

        • Friends lists are always wonky on Facebook. My number friends changes daily even though none were added nor taken away. I notice this because I only have one friend, the fake profile I set up to make me feel less lonely : (


      • ah i dont know what I’m doing as far as posting a photo can you possibly delete this and the above please jacy .. thank you

      • And don’t worry, I got it.

        Also — kind of you to give her the benefit of the doubt re: “I don’t know her well enough.” Your kindness is sadly misplaced, however, because these kinds of nasty shenanigans are vintage JA. Go read the thing under the banner, The Internet Never Forgets. That was a little over a year ago, and was years after she and the dude had broken up.

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