Julia Allison Is So Proud Of Her Ignorant NonSociety Girls

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Julia Allison, of the Baugher Allisons, had the omg best birthday weekend (wtf???) ever!

The best birthday weekend I’ve ever had – but now this ancient 29-year-old needs SLEEP. Goodnight!! 42 minutes ago via web

She also has like, the BEST GIRLS. Not only are they tiny and cute, a couple of them are married, and they are all brilliant! Take Megan Lasagna, their…um…wait does she do again?

Megan: You should see the hat Meghan just got. It’s enormous, with feathers. It’s one of those … what are they called? For the …
Me: … Derby.
Megan: Yes!
Me: Oh, we definitely need to go to the Kentucky Derby next year.
Megan: Okay. Where is it?
Me: Uh … Kentucky??
Megan: Wait, it’s really in Kentucky?
Me: You can’t be serious.
Megan: I don’t think I knew it was there. Who goes to Kentucky for anything?
So ignoring for a moment that Julia thinks these exchanges are so adorable, it’s sort of coming off as her trying to show that she’s the smart, savvy bidness woman surrounded by a bunch of goofy girls; that she deserves to be the leader of these poor clueless lambs.
But SIGH! In her next post she reminds us “I’m so proud of these women.” So proud of my friends, they try so hard! Bless their hearts!
Whatever. I think I’m burned out on the burro for a few days.

105 COMMENTS

  1. Would that be Julia of the “Roosevelt Island is a borough” Allisons?

    And remember, kids, 8 x 6 = 42. So cute.

    • That is what is so infuriating is that it is not cute. Why the hell does she just get to skate by in life acting like a complete idiot? Many of us work our asses off and still can’t just go flitting around the country willy nilly, going to fashion week , and just doing whatever the fuck we want. How fuck does she get away with not being an adult? People around her need to stop enabling her dumb ass already. It is pathetic.

      • Again, those remarks made by Joyce Carol Oates on Amy Bishop that keep popping up: “She is socially maladroit, highly self-conscious, and disdainful of others . . . She is ‘special’ . . .She is a sociopath and has been enabled through her life by individuals around her who shield her from punishment.” I just say.

  2. Too bad Little Miss Genius Maths is hard hasn’t realized that trying to make the people surrounding her come across as dumb or ignorant doesn’t automatically make her look like the smart one. It just makes her look like a major bitch.

      • Except that Heidi Montag has had plastic surgery up the ass so she is not fat. She does have the same deer in the headlights stare that donks has been sporting lately though.

  3. The best part about her latest sartorial insanity is that every future prospective employer will see page after page of same-faced, pink-ruffled desperation when they Google her name. I don’t think she could be taken seriously in any media, tech, or political circles ever again (if she ever truly was). How could any sophisticated, intelligent, adult person with money to spend be positively influenced to buy something recommended by this tacky idiot-child?

    Julia Allison may be successful at garnering attention, but her personal brand is that of a selfish, vapid, ditzy assclown. Congratulations, Julia. um…er…oops?

    • I do agree that she will never be taken seriously as an innovator/entrepreneur. Sometimes I think that this must kill her (like when I read her belabored & overreaching prose on topics like bagels). Other times, I think she doesn’t mind if she’s seen as an Audrina Patridge type or an Arianna Huffington type: As long as she’s seen (and people think she’s cute, of course. No h8rz!).

      At one time (c. Wired cover, pre-NS, now approaching MANY moons ago) people may have thought she had potential to really pull it off. But then the scales tipped, and continue sinking more in the direction of Tila Tequila w/a thesarus than anyone legitimately intelligent.

    • “[E]very future prospective employer will see page after page of same-faced, pink-ruffled desperation when they Google her name.”

      Do you think JAB has any intention of ever again obtaining a job she can’t have through personal connections or nepotism?

      • This.

        Julia isn’t some recent college grad from the suburbs looking to break into publishing. She gets everything through connections and ass-kissing which are two of the most important job requirements in the NY media scene.

      • Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night screaming, convinced that Julia has been accepted into HBS. (not really, but wouldn’t she love it if I did?)

      • …and she’ll definitely get admitted to HBS as the two key requirements for admission are 1) recognizing the HBS MBA as a ‘fuck you credential’ and 2) the sincere desire to make ‘fuck you money’

        Of all the ‘future prospect damning’ content that the Donk has created… that video has to be near the top of the list.

      • I showed NS to my dad, who used to teach at HBS, and all he could do was shake his head in disbelief.

  4. Dear Ms. Baugher,
    Big girls get big checks. See R. Uchitel.

    Best of luck.

    PS- Next year, try traveling to and from Davos in a vertical position. Or at least hold the pictures for Momster and Dadster so you look vertical.

  5. OMFG!!! She just screams dumb trophy wife except that she is also fat. PK marry her dumb ass already and get her out of the mainstream society. I just hope to G_d that the kids get the dads brains because Donks is a complete airhead. Nothing up there and I mean NOTHING. Vapid stares of hello up there? Anyone home ?

  6. When the two of them go out who cuts the food into small bite size pieces so they don’t choke to death?

    I guess in this Aldonkquin round table, Julia has the feral cunning to be top donkey. She’s like a tenacious pink famewhore e-cockroach.

    • Wait’ll Katrina reads Jordan’s blog & discovers:
      (1) Jordan went to SF on the NS dime, presumably under the pretense of attending biz mtgs for which she admittedly has no idea the purpose of
      (2) Jordan & Kendrick, unlike Katrina & Brant, were also invited (& will be going) to Aspen on the flavor of the month’s dime

      Sounds like Katrina hasn’t heard of Julia’s:
      (1) Expiration Date for Women, after which they lose validation
      (2) Ire for bloggers over 40 who just need to go garden instead

      • “At 22, I was HIGHLY aware that I had an expiration date — as a woman.” I love how she uses both hands to trace her boobies when she clarifies the point “as a woman.” She didn’t want people to think she PERSONALLY has an expiration date; it is the fate of all womankind, apparently.

        [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAsCAPHzQPg&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6]

        I don’t have HBO, and I keep trying to find this whole documentary to download; whenever it is posted to YouTube, it comes down faster than Julia’s standards.

      • We may be waiting some time. Katrina only worked out who Randi was from photos after the event.

      • Stop that video at 0:21 / 0:52 where she’s index-fingering one eyebrow into its arch of doom ~ then cover half the screen & see Michael Jackson ~ ooooph!

      • What happens when one reaches one’s expiration date “as a woman”? Does one become a man?

        This may be part of her rumored pact with Satan. When the clock strikes midnight on her 30th birthday, her clam bake becomes a wienie roast.

  7. I’d LOVE it if Julia dared to show up at the Kentucky Derby. Southern society women (Mary’s passive aggressive routine X100) would cut her down to size so fast it would make her pelts fall out. BLESS HER HEART.

    • Ever since Hugh Hefner and his hoterie showed up there and filmed an episode of GND, the place just hasn’t been the same.

      • The Derby is always crawling with D List celebs (remember when Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey went years ago on an episode of their show?) but they always look so horribly and uncomfortably out of place. Julia showing up there in some cheap dress and plastic heels and turning her bumpkin nose up at southerners would be hilarious. Bitch would get cut DOWN.

  8. OT–I had a weird thought re: the photo of JABS and her date on Valentine’s Day. The one where the date had a cigarette in his hand? Now that we know Jordan and Kendrick are smokers…was it Kendrick? Did they all go out together?

  9. The toilet paper doll must have come from Meghan Asha the Tech Queen of Puerto Rico’s apartment. We do love our toilet paper dolls.

  10. Poor Jordan; first she was jetlagged and now she’s sick:

    # just flew across the country…only to get sick. awesome. about 14 hours ago via web

    Wouldn’t it be awesome if there were a coup at Nonsociety, and Julia got kicked to the curb?? Such are the scraps of hope I cling to. 😉

      • Those nerve-wracking weekend meetings?

        When are they going to Asspen? And how long will they have to endure the sales pitch for timeshares before they’re allowed to hit the slopes?

  11. I see JA has been doing the ole donkeydance: pic of the “invite” with praise for the new superintern (lol), pics with Britt and Allie, pic of her actually looking affectionate with PK (still smiley-faced even though his pic is here & on Gawker). Funny. Also, random question: was it established that momsers was in PK’s apt when he wasn’t there, since he met her for the first time at 44 1/2?

  12. Megan: I don’t think I knew it was there. Who goes to Kentucky for anything?

    Says Megan Lasagna of the Long Island Lasagnas.

    Seriously. These bumpkins make the trashy, ignorant hicks of Kentucky look like class acts by comparison. Sorry to be so ragey, but I’m from the south and Julia and Megan’s mocking of things they view “beneath” them gives me the stabbies. Who the fuck are these girls to talk? Did they SEE the birthday pictures? A chubby 30 year old in a flammable slip who lives with her parents on LI and picks up dog shit for a career has A LOT of room to talk.

      • Oh no – I’m not saying all southerners or Kentuckians are trashy, ignorant hicks – just that even the worst southern stereotypes have more class than these cheesy mall rat bumpkins. Megan bagging on Kentucky is RICH.

      • Not meant to sound braggy. I have three relatives that compete in events such as the ROLEX KENTUCKY ~ trust me when I say, any one of their six horses *individually* has an annual expense sheet well beyond what Lasagna earns as an NS schlep.

        Maybe Lasagna’s folks will retire, sell the Lawn Guyland place, buy an RV & travel ~ face it, Lasagna ain’t leaving home, home is going to have to leave Lasagna ~ either she’ll get out on her own in the real world or she’ll at least view some of it from behind shatterproof glass.

      • Yeah seriously. My father and stepmother are there and I can guarantee you that their living circumstances would set Lasagna’s dumb mug agog. People from LI really shouldn’t be casting stones, especially when wearing the ABS Allen Schwartz version of a Calvin Klein slip dress that I had in 1996.

    • Ignorant? Why don’t you trying figuring out my 11 secret herbs and spices; then you can get back to me about who’s ignorant, my dear.

      *bawk-bawk-baaaawwwwk!*

      • Goddamn wordpress, always spoiling my jokes!

        It would have been funny, coming from this avatar…

    • My grandfather was from Kentucky – his folks owned a movie theater in Louisville. He grew up next door to the Clooneys and dated George’s aunt.
      Some of the smartest, warmest and talented people I know are from Kentucky.
      These creatures don’t know class. I’ve had a Donkey-free weekend and needed to air out it out a little….

      • Good lord, catching up…. my blood boils every time Donkey bastardizes “art” – Jim Dine is from across the river in Cincinnati.

  13. Ohhhhhh, Lo-urd Gahd up yonder in Hevin! She has trespassed against Thou in ways innumerable and profane but none profaner than smearing her donkey shite on Thy Blessed Country Of Kain-tuck, where I myself handle snakes every Sunday and Wednesday night and sometimes on Thursday afternoon if I feelest like it for They Greater Glory!! Thou are provoking Him to Great Wrath, donkster and my prayers for vengeance upon ye echo throughout the halls of mine Kain-tucky trailer home!! A Great Pox upon thy pink house! Amen!

      • That reminds me, can somebody check on the Sheriff? I’m worried about him. He’s been too damn quiet lately.

      • He’s around, he’s just too busy jerking off to Manswers and the Outdoor Life Network.

      • Yea though I have counseled many of the sistern in my office at yon church house, I have no recollection of any named Rebecca, especially if thou art a brother husband in disguise.

    • DADDY! I told you that I have this one covered. Don’t you have some snakes to commune with or demons to drive out?

      LOL isn’t my Daddy adorable? He is the biggest contributor to the Youth Group.

      • Oh daughter of mine, hath I not said to thee: ix-nay on alking-tay about the outh-yay roup-gay?!?!

      • @Reader Becky + @preacherjim

        LULZ. I would like to see a special guest post by Reader Becky and preacherjim.

        Praise the Lord!

      • I would love to write an Ask Reader Becky column! Yay.com!

        Daddy can edit. We are just like the Baughers but less creepy!

  14. Whatever happened to test prep for B-School?

    Oh, wait. She had to have two birthday parties and go to Aspen. Plus, now that PK is in the heezy, why bother?

    Ugh. It’s sickening.

    • Fashion Week, Birthday Week, Mooching off on PK in Aspen Week, this may all count for extenuating circumstances, you know?

  15. Oh, and thank God Jordo is bringing a Fresh Perspective on San Fran in her blerg! The trip was totes worth it:

    “The Bloody Marys were boring boring – as basic as could be…and no celery stick, which to me is really the point of ordering a Bloody Mary.”

    • As per usual, Julia binges on cupcakes for two days then chases ’em w/ pancakes & bagels. I don’t know why she puts on bullshit vegetarian pescatarian airs ~ she has no moral issues about an animal she owns & consuming that much processed food certainly isn’t a health choice either.

    • Maybe if they knew fuck-all about the City they would know to go to Zeitgeist for Bloody Marys on a Sunday. Of course, maybe I am just relishing the idea of Jawly and Co. surrounded by the clientele of Zeitgeist.

      • Champain…

        As a former Mission District gal myself, I immediately thought of a zillion places to go for good bloody marys and better brunches than Perry’s. Immediately stopped myself from saying a word as prefer my faves not trod upon by donks and co

  16. j_dorbs replied to my comment on her post of NS ladies before SF party:

    ME:
    Looks like EVERYONE was confused by last night’s theme, dear.
    Flag

    jordanreid [Moderator] 21 hours ago in reply to FS
    Meh, that’s part of the fun. It’s a costume party, not the Inaugural Ball.

    mmmkay.

    • Prescient posting.

      Not related, but there is no doubt Le Donkey Dumbass lurks and reads. She has the personality type where by she just couldn’t help it.

      Damn Davos. I believe her appearance there provided Dadser with validation that her Lifecast BS has value and he should continue to fund this desperation. After all, his legal clients would give their left nut to go, and his little precious Julia beat them to it.

      You heard it hear — she won’t get in to HBS.

      • she didn’t get invited to davos because of non-society or any other legitimate, professional reason. she piggybacked on randi’s invitation (each attendee gets a +1 for partners/spouses). trust.

  17. she didn’t get invited to davos because of non-society or any other legitimate, professional reason. she piggybacked on randi’s invitation (each attendee gets a +1 for partners/spouses). trust.

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