Why Does This Happen To The Nice One and Not the Donkey

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Jordan Reid, sweet potato, had a harrowing experience and ALMOST DIED! (Kind of, but not really.) First there was this:

OK, so our holiday travel experience thus far has been…less-than-smooth.

Were you one of the hundreds of people stuck in terrible traffic on the Grand Central Parkway on the way to LaGuardia Airport around 6PM on Wednesday? Well, you can thank us (or at least the lady who cut off our taxi, resulting in a semi-terrifying skid and collision). The accident was bad enough that the taxi driver had to wait for the police, but our flight time was rapidly drawing nearer…so Kendrick and I stood in the lane that had been blocked off for the accident and sort of flailed around, hoping to find a taxi willing to stop in the middle of the highway to pick us up. This plan did not work.

Fortunately, a Good Samaritan came to our aid.

Then there was this:

See those lights? That would be about seventy thousand fire trucks and police cars outside my airplane window, all of which showed up shortly following an explosion towards the back of the plane that happened seconds before takeoff and caused the pilot to slam on the brakes, sending the plane kind of skidding across the runway (I’m not faulting the pilot here; I am absolutely thrilled that braking occurred rather than flying).

Apparently we made the news. Here’s someone’s video of our little adventure.

Thank god nothing happened to her. If something did, while the donkey continues to bray on our televisions and eat cupcakes and veggie juice unscathed, I would have officially lost my faith in the world.

Anyway, Happy Donksgiving!

15 COMMENTS

  1. Posted on wrong thread. Repost.

    And she’s being totally undramatic and level headed about this whole thing. Imagine if this happened to old jules? The braying would be incessant, audible coast to coast, for weeks to come.

  2. Julia is even too lazy to be an effective witch. Neither of her spells worked on JoBe. Close doesn’t count.

  3. OMG can you imagine the drama. We would have heard about epiphanies and white lights and having her life flash before her eyes and realizing what’s truly important in life and how it was a paradigm-shifter.

    And a week later, she’d be back to Tweeting about how she resents having to get her ass out of bed and why won’t her San Francisco Bonehead return her texts immediately.

    • It would be like in Clueless when Tai has her brush with death after “gang members try to attack her” at the mall.

  4. Jordan, honey, you are making your guardian angel work overtime. She tried to stop you from getting on that plane by causing a minor accident with the taxi. You’re just lucky she was able to stop that plane before it took off.

    I shudder to think what would have happened, had you been traveling with the Donkey instead of Kendrick. Your guardian angel probably would have had to toss a coin on that decision.

  5. Agree, Jordan handling it all with much more grace than JA ever could. Really feel for her and her hubbie tho, glad they are ok. Saw it on the news last nite and actually thought to myself who flies to Akron, Ohio and surprised to hear she was on board. Someone def watching over her!!

  6. Reminds me of why I hate flying over the holidays out of nyc. Just had the best thanksgiving ever. Picked up din for two at Whole Foods plus a coconut cream pie. Had a few cocktails at Laconda Verde where we saw Roger Sterling from Mad Men. Back home to chow. Awaiting Giants game.

  7. and of course Julia says not a thing of concern for her best buddy omg! She reblogged something about Jordan’s adorable hat. really Julia? nothing? not even a half-assed “soooooooo glad my bunny is still with us!”?

  8. what’s up with super skinny Jobe? toothpick legs.
    And what’s up the happy couple wearing matching hipter boots?
    I’m so glad I’m not in my 20s, or 30s.

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