Julia Allison Wants You To Talk About Her Vagina

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Just got the 4 remaining hairs on my body totally obliterated by the best laser hair removal in NYC: Advanced Derma Tech. Hairless mole 4eva

So I did. Happy?

118 COMMENTS

  1. HOLY CRAP!!!!!! I had a mouthful of my chocolate whey protein shake when I clicked over to this!!!!
    I can assure you, it does NOT feel good coming out my nose.
    You guys slay me.

  2. I am assuming she is getting free laser treatments for mentioning / shilling the place she goes.

    Julia Allison – now literally whoring out her vagina. Klazzy.

    Hopefully she got those sideburns touched up as well. Werewolf was lookin’ a little bushy lately.

  3. So, the hairs on a mole were removed, or she is a hairless mole? She’s so freegin gross.

    And by the way, Gloria Steinem is proud of you, Jules. Keep on pushing those limits.

    • yea, i too read it as hairs on a mole. which is a fucking weird thing to have lazed, i think, but whatever.

    • She’s so fucking lame at making jokes. She was probably attempting to reference the naked mole rat (Kim Possible shoutout!) and instead referenced the wicked witch (which is really more appropriate, anyway).

      Julia Allison humor fail. Again. 🙁

    • Nah. More like, watch out Kevin Rose. One, two, Freddy’s coming for you. Three, four, better lock your door…

  4. Uh, thanks, I guess. I was really hungry and out of snacks, but now I’ll never eat again. Goodbye, food diary.

    • Me too. I applaud JP for the photo selection but I’m going to have to
      close my eyes a bit until I scroll down!! eek!

  5. audibly gasped when saw that thing.

    who wants permanent laser hair removal on your vadge? being a bald eagle isn’t gonna be so appealing when you’re older…

  6. not cool JP. you need like a warning before that image. Sweet Christ. Looks like Jack Nicholson at the end of the Witches of Eastwick.

    • Next up, buttcrack bleaching.

      Bet you ladies under 30 didn’t know about that particular horror, now did you? Nobody warned me that my Hershey highway would end up looking as stained as the bottom of an old toilet bowl, AND YOURS WILL, TOO! Oh, and let’s not forget the itchy torment of a whole new crop of hair in there, too. Break out the hand mirrors, ladybugs, it may already be happening! Bwahahahahahaha!!!

      Don’t worry. Modern science has come to the rescue with adorably named treatments, such as “Pink Cheeks” and “Divine Derriere”.

      (Sorry if I traumatized anybody. It just seemed like the right time, what with the shock you’ve just had from thinking about Julia’s ugly, bad* clam.)

      *not a typo

  7. No pubic hair, AT ALL? FOREVER??? REALLY???????

    Her obsession with being seen as a little girl is alarming. Most real men don’t want a bald vag on their woman. At least not all the time. The only guys I’ve ever encountered who prefer that or care are the overporned, the frat boys, or the complete douchebags.

    • “Her obsession with being seen as a little girl is alarming.”

      That’s especially rich considering she was just scolding Urban Outfitters for their “kiddie porn” models.

    • okay. here’s some truth: whenever i shave my vag completely bald, i inevitably get an infection. even if i don’t have sex. i’m convinced that my hair keeps “bad things” out of there, like my nose hairs do.

      anyone else experience this? (i’m willing to believe i am just a freak.)

      • You’re definitely not alone. Here are a few of the benefits, and I think the first one might be a surprise to Miss Allison.

        *Pheromones

        Scientists believe that pubic hair retains sexual secretions that we know as pheromones. This is what attracts us to each other. The body gives off more pheromones as you sweat, and those secretions are retained in the pubic hair regions.

        *Natural lubrication

        Pubic hair is also a natural thing to protect against body friction. Rubbing of skin can irritate and hair helps to decrease this problem. It helps to protect your sensitive areas from redness caused by the skin rubbing. This could also provide a protection of possible irritation during intercourse.

        *Infection

        Although there is no scientific data on this, many believe that the pubic hair helps to stop infections from entering the body. Whether this is true or not no one really knows. It does keep out any dust or dirt that could enter the vagina. Those particles are caught in the hair and, when we wash, are washed out. The same would hold true for men, that pubic hair would catch any dust particles from irritating the penis.

        THE MORE YOU KNOW!! 🙂

      • Not to get all vadge talky here but there’s also a sensitivity issue too. A little hair helps keep your ladybits protected from rubbing on your clothes especially if you are always encased in tight outfits like the donkerina. Not that she wants those pesky orgasms anyway, they only make her cry.

    • I equate a girl with a permanently hairless vag to a guy who waxes his private regions. completely douchey.

      i think the occasional full-on wax can be fun, but going bald forever is just lame. my past and present boyfriends have all preferred hair to none. but these are normal, well-educated, artistic men — not d-bags… it’s probably good that julia is bald since she seems like she’ll end up with a slimy dude who’d expect that kind of thing because he idolizes girls like paris hilton.

      and i actually think there’s a current trend towards men wanting a full-on bush. i hope julia can find quality pussy pelts.

      • I agree. The bush is back. And honestly, a guy who’s going to be good in bed and really likes vagina does not care about the state of a vagina’s hair. I want my man to be like YES!! VAGINA!!!! every time he sees mine. Not “oh no she didn’t shave”. It reminds me of guys who won’t do oral. Like, do you like vag or not wtf.

      • Pussy pelts exist! They’re called merkins! Jules should buy stock in them now since she’ll help them profit someday when she regrets her hairless wonder.

  8. It’s actually really sad to me that she sees this as something men want. Like, it truly gives me the sads inside. Because many women have this point of view, and it makes me wonder how many sad, superficial people are out there or how many women are made to feel inadequate by their partners over an errant pubic hair.

    • What’s really sad is that Julia doesn’t even have a serious partner / reason to laser her body bald for anyone other than herself.

    • honestly i don’t think guys care either way, they just want to get LAID.

      and if a guy says something to you about it that’s when you tell them to fuck off because why would you want to be with someone who makes you self-concious when you’re naked and horny?

      • Some guys yes, but some guys no. I know guys who have talked shit about girls afterwards because the girl had a bush more than a landing strip. And also, why do desperate girls do anything? I mean…a lot of girls put up with a lot worse from guys and who knows why. Low self-esteem is a bitch.

  9. Holy crap, I was stopping by to drop off another load in the commenting toilet, and saw that horrible rodent — now I forgot what I came here to say!!!

    Oh, yeah. I was just watching the first season of VH1’s Tough Love online, and snorted twinkie cream out my nose when the host of the show had this to say about a chick who was trying to pose sexy in a photoshoot:

    “I don’t care if you’re Naomi Campbell, posing with cupcakes and a tiara isn’t sexy.”

    Next up is a chick with a tutu, and they’ve got another one obsessed with weddings. If they signed up Julia for this thing, they wouldn’t need any other participants. Just week after week of one-on-ones with her and Steve Ward. And maybe a crack team of psychiatrists. God, I would LOVE to see her face as she watches men she would die to date give feedback on the impression she makes.

  10. AAARGGGHHH!!!!

    Note to self: Stay away from RBNS until the wrinkly fanged vagina has moved off the top of the page!!!

  11. Almost as amazing as the fact that she posted this at all (twice) is the fact that this was her entire day.

    • I know. That’s what disgusted me about it. It’s Monday, people are at work, and she’s getting beauty treatments done.

      • Her day is exactly the same every day:
        – sleep until noon or later
        – maybe leave her apartment once during the afternoon for an errand
        – maybe go to dinner or meet up with someone random, just to take a picture and say that she did something that day.
        – stay up until 3 or 4 a.m.
        – lather, rinse, repeat

        No wonder she’s fucking insane. I would be too if my life was that boring.

      • It probably gets paid for out of NS company funds and written off as a business expense so, technically, she was at work. Just think, if she can show a business loss this year (and, undoubtedly, she can), she might even get a tax refund which she can use for more pelts!

        Rage, anyone?

  12. DE-MOLE-ITION: Laser destruction of your yard.

    MOLE-CTOMY: Codename TK dumping Julia.

    MOLE-ISMS: Julia’s Tweets.

    MOLE-ABERATE: The making of TMI Weakly.

    MOLE-ODIC: Julia’s lip-dubs.

    MOLE-SKITO: Tiny, mole-like creature in a tutu, waving a wand.

    MOLE-JITO: Clam juice.

    SOPH-MOLE: Julia, trying to re-create her GU days.

    RE-MOLTE CONTROL: RBNS putting Julia through her paces.

  13. Did she have all the hair lasered off, like even the hair on the labia majora and around the asshole? I can’t even imagine how they do the labia. They’d have to put you in stirrups and manually manipulate the skin to get the laser aimed right. Who would let a stranger who’s not a doctor fondle their labia? What is wrong with her?

    • Wait, I need to know this (sadly). I thought you had to get up on all fours, doggy style. Stirrups are involved? STIRRUPS? Oh my lord. Just never. How fuck.

    • Stirrups are involved. There is also a pain killing cream that must be applied an hour before which completely numbs the entire area to be lasered. Yes, that makes your asshole feel extremely weird for a time, but it’s better the searing pain of a laser that burns hair out from the follicle root. Yup. Inner labia.

      The laser is like a hand held ultrasound and the aesthetician needs to apply a lubricant over the entire area to be lasered (see above) before lasering begins.

      For the asshole lasering, one must suffer the indignity of getting on one’s knees and holding open one’s own butt cheeks.

      I just say….

      NOTE: Only dark hair can be lasered. The laser needs pigment in the hair to connect to. Natural blonds should stick with waxing or sugaring.

  14. She only did this so she can later have a breakdown and “actually cry” about trying to find the perfect merkin.

  15. We really shouldn’t bag her on this. After all, she donates all the lasered-off hair to charity. Adrien Field can’t replenish his fur vests on his own.

  16. Wait. She seriously said the words “hairless mole” about herself?!?!? Seriously? I have done laser hair removal and never regretted it… Until I read that line. Somebody shoot me.

  17. So are Julia’s latest lie cast posts, one re: laser treatment with a mention of the place and the other re: holiday clothing from Chloe and Reese, sponsored posts? Or are we to believe that cheapo Julia purchased (or her grandmother) four $200+ Chloe and Reese garments and the laser treatment in a single day?

    As with everything the new FCC rules don’t apply to old julia.

    • It wouldn’t surprise me if it was all shilling but also, I’ve noticed that since she got the Sony deal all she does is bray about shopping and things she buys. I think she’s probably blowing through that wad right quick. And why not? She has Daddy and Grandma Money Bags to fall back on.

      She’s disgusting.

  18. My theory…she’s zapped all her hair off so she looks better in the soon to be released sex tape from Hawaii.

  19. Kevin Rose is in town y’all! She’s gotta make sure the image of her hairless little-girl-like vagina is fresh in his mind. It’s what men like! Although she did it only for herself of course and no one else not to please men no no no, she is very happy being single except she’s lonely sometimes and likes to look at bridal dresses just because she likes weddings NOT because she wants to get married!!! Got it? Ok.

  20. I can’t decide which image is more upsetting: the scorched earth that now lies between her legs, or those four ragtag hairs that were remnants of previous assaults.

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