Julia: Another Manic Upswing

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It’s really hard to keep track of Jackle’s mood swings. I mean they aren’t even daily or weekly mood swings now — they’re HOURLY.

I’m going to be totally honest: I have never, in my life, been as happy as I am right now, and it has absolutely nothing to do with finances (I have no money) or men (I’m dating a lot of people very, very casually, but no one’s even made it to a third date yet) or best friends (Meghan, Mary & I have been going through some tough times in our relationship) or even family (my mother and I didn’t speak for the entire month of January. I’ll tell you that story some other time …).

I think I’m so happy because I am SO GRATEFUL for this life I’ve been given. I think about being grateful all of the time – several times a day. I never used to do that. I think about it when I’m walking down the street with my puppy, when I drink my green juice in the morning, when I go to the gym (ha!), when I check my email, when I crawl into my bed at night (or, more accurately, in the early AM hours). I thought about how thankful I was when I was on the flight to Munich, when I was in the car heading to Davos, in the tiny, barren rooms we had there (with barely any heat), when we were hiking through the snow in our boots, when we were skiing down the mountain and I thought I was going to die (or just break a femur or two) – at every dinner, in every interaction, I thought about it.

My life is more or less the same – in fact, perhaps by “objective” standards, worse! – but I have never felt so blessed.

I called my grandmother last night and she said this, “happiness is an attitude of gratitude.” It’s so cheesy, right?? But I can’t tell you how true it is.

And it’s the key to unlocking so much of the pain we’re constantly in. Life throws us curve balls all of the time – events and situations and incidents which make our stomach sink with dread, our eyes well with tears, our throats close up with nerves. These things can intimidate us and anger us and – let’s be honest – scare the shit out of us.

But … I’ve found – and I say this only because I’ve tested it extensively over the last year – that if you take a deep breath, calmly take it all in, tell yourself, “this too shall pass,” and believe – just BELIEVE – that things will work out for the best, all the while continuing to realize the blessings you still have, however tiny or seemingly mundane, you’ll find a most extraordinary thing happens: you’re happy

Let me get this straight. You’ve just had a public bitchfight with your supposed best friend over the most shallow of subject matters — designer clothing that didn’t make you look enough like “the hot one.” You’re talking about a need for security and stability just hours earlier. You confess not having spoken to your own mother for a month (I suspect this resulted from her parents’ lecturing her about the lunacy of a bi-coastal birthday party when the economy, and likely her business, is in the toilet. She Twittered and/or blogged about that at one point, and seemed proud that she basically told them to piss off). You’ve apparently not managed to convince the married gazillionaire you confessed to having a “totally inappropriate crush on” to a third date. You are increasingly becoming an international laughing stock — even the Germans are making fun of you, and have you ever seen a German game show? Those people love tacky.

And yet this is happiness? Or is this yet another passive-aggressive shot at whomever you’re trying to prove a point to? I am guessing Mary. Better to pretend you’ve never been happier the day after really hurting a friend than to actually publicly apologize the way you publicly humiliated her, right?

1 COMMENT

  1. I don’t get the impression that she’s happy AT ALL. Let’s see; she has no money, no friends, her parents don’t talk to her, practically no job, her room at Davos sucked, no boyfriend… That actually sounds really awful.

    Those posts just seemed like a response to this blog. It’s like, see guys! I’m happy! So happy! You can’t bring me down! Look at me! I’m so happy!!

    So manic.

    On another note, I’m not clever enough to make my own nickname (loved Ms. Bojankles, lol). I’m willing to take suggestions!

  2. Ya gotta love Julia when the manic upswing occurs and just keeps on pulsating, upping the ridiculousness. “I put my grubby hands all over a book at Barnes and Noble with no intention of paying for it and had THE. BEST. DAY. EVER.” “Lily and I watched an old rerun of SATC together, eating popcorn out of her dog dish. Lily and I both felt blessed! So grateful for being the laughing stock of the Internet and having a smart mother who no longer wishes to speak to me!”

    Any bets as to when the former Ms. Baugher cracks up completely?

    Oh, and I’ll refer to Julia any way I damn well please, whether JAB, Jackles, Jankles, or Julia Allison Button, the girl who grew backwards. I absolutely refuse to to give any breaks when it comes to this dishonest, talentless, immoral narcissist who would sell her own mother for a quarter if she thought it would get the cover of Newsweek.

  3. Forgot to sign my 7:10 post!
    –Jean Brodie

    (not on here as much as I would like but will figure out that URL thing)

  4. I am SO sick of the “I’m happy! I swear! Can’t you see?! I’m smiling, so I’m happy, DUH!”

    Go. Away. Blergity Blerg Blerg – That’s happy in “Blerg” you guys.

  5. she’s probably REALLY jealous of Mary’s super close relationship w/her mom. and it’s showing w/the way she is treating her.

  6. And we have some Gawker commenters here! Please show yourselves!

    I am Mackintosh-Toffee. Welcome Jean Brodie!

    I think that Baugher, Reblogging Julia needs to rename his subjects. Jackles is now the Handmaiden of Passive Aggression. I leave it to Mr. Baugher (we all assumed he was an extremely gifted, cutting gay man, perhaps this is the case. Or not.) to rename Mary the Queen.

    Mary Queen of Typos? Mary Queen of Mishaps, Mistakes and Other Blunders?

    Who knows! This could get very interesting as the power shifts. If it does, even falsely for a time.

    All i know is that JAB is bonkers and needs her medicine. STAT.

  7. Let me get this straight. She’s going to charge people a “donation fee” to come to her themed birthday party? Are there enough people who would even show up for free, let alone pay?

  8. Is there something in that book she "borrowed" from Barnes & Noble that has a line about not finding a man until you're truly happy? (Or maybe a line from that gahdawful movie HJNTIY?) I can't think of anything else that makes sense.

  9. I think this *heart to heart* post is for us. However, I also think it is for her. She lives in the public sphere…meaning, she must document everything for the consumption of others and through that, her existence is validated. I guess it’s kind of like, “If I say it out loud, then it’s real.”

    I really think she has mental problems. The bottom line is that all of it strokes her own ego. She serves herself and fills the gaping voids in her existence through *talking* to us (the public).

    We’re her big sounding board, though she never listens to our responses. We’re the one-way/Julia-to-us sounding/viewing board.

    Also, I think her mom was most likely disappointed in her trips around the world in January. She may have been proud of her talk in Munich, but I’m sure she questioned her motives for anything else, especially as evidenced in the lifecasted photos. I think this may be why JA was so off-line/no wi-fi for most of it. Mom would see more of the empty party-crashing if she posted…

    Anyway, sorry if this was said up above somewhere…didnt read yet!

    FB

  10. no, but marys blog said something along those lines today.

    “True intimacy with another is possible when you’ve cultivated true intimacy with yourself.”

  11. Why hasn’t Gawker linked to this site? It’s getting nearly as much traffic as the site itself, and their site is a joke – it would make for a good story!

  12. I looked on Alexa the other day and this site’s traffic was trending way higher while theirs was sinking. When RBNS posts regularly, it seriously eats into their numbers.

  13. I admit I’m not the always the sharpest knife in the drawer, but has RBNS just re-titled their links as “Sites We Sometimes Like”? Did it always include the “Sometimes”? Because, HAR! 😉

  14. PrincessKashmir here — nice to see all of you guys!

    You know, if JAB would actually write about those difficult moments as they happen instead of lumping them all together under the guise of a blog breakthrough, she wouldn’t be so disliked. If she really has had such a rough go of it, why does every post read as if it’s the BEST DAY OF HER LIFE, OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS!!!

  15. Let’s please not give this woman any relevant excuses, like mental illness. If we really believed she were manic versus just an egotistical crazyass, we wouldn’t make fun of her. She’s just a bad, bad person, period, in all respects. No facet of her ridiculousness is due to forces beyond her control. The girl ain’t mentally ill, she’s just a fuck-up.

  16. I’m squeeing over every commenter who reveals their Gawker identity. You are the folks I’ve always counted on there when anything JABberstalky-related is posted.