WTF? The Thanksgiving Goddess?

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Is it time for a new persona? Julia is channeling Erma Bombeck? Words fail me. And then there was this:

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“It’s Dee-licious & Yummy!” Smellsberg’s New Grift: Untangled Love

For your weekend viewing pleasure. Ayelet Shimron interviews me on two of my favorite topics, my concept of untangled love, and also kink/BDSM. Some of the questions we cover include:

–> What is the relation between untangled love, vs. polyamory, vs. casual hookups?
–> Why we start *hiding* parts of ourselves as soon as we want something from someone sexually or romantically.
–> What are kink/BDSM?
–> When are these practices safe, and when are they not safe?
–> Why do some empowered women feel ashamed about their desire to explore BDSM?
–> How should people who are interested in exploring it start?
–> Why I love kink/BDSM

This is some hot territory we get into. Enjoy!

Memo to Julia Allison: Be sure to enroll in Michael’s new course, his “ultimate share,” The Art of Writing for Facebook, and up those one or two comments to your constant FB crowdsourcing.  You’re a “social media expert,” right?  We’d hate it if someone accused you of being a liar.

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Stoner Rainbow Allison Finds Brilliance In Hollywood Idiocy

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A third Facebook post praising insulated, dumbass La La Land brats Jaden and Willow Smith when everyone with two brain cells to rub together is laughing their asses off?

“I wanna transcend personality. I wanna transcend all of that and go into a higher state of being.” – Willow Smith

The Smith kids are my new heroes.

Like Julia Allison 100 years ago, the Malibu teen philosophers had a profile piece in the NYT’s embarrassing style section.

While other readers were chuckling, Donkey was swept away:

Um … holy S–T .. READ THIS. These “kids” (are they really kids? They seem like philosophers who time travelled into the bodies of mega-star teenage children) are waxing philosophical on some pretty intense stuff.

Willow is reading quantum physics and Jaden says things like “Your mind has a duality to it. So when one thought goes into your mind, it’s not just one thought, it has to bounce off both hemispheres of the brain. When you’re thinking about something happy, you’re thinking about something sad. When you think about an apple, you also think about the opposite of an apple. It’s a tool for understanding mathematics and things with two separate realities. But for creativity: That comes from a place of oneness. That’s not a duality consciousness. And you can’t listen to your mind in those times — it’ll tell you what you think and also what other people think.”

um. I was not speaking like that at 16.

“What’s your job, what’s your career? Nah, I am. I’m going to imprint myself on everything in this world.” – Jaden Smith … um … getting pretty deep in a NYT interview.

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Julia also loved a video of grannies getting stoned for the first time – “YES TO THIS, just YES. YES!”  My 14-year-old nephew loved this, too.  Emotional maturity, thy name is Woo Donkey!

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Help Julia Allison Finish The Crappiness Project!

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Dumbass Donkey is done marveling over Hollywood teen philosophers Jaden & Willow Smith and is allegedly gearing up to fulfill her contract with St. Martin’s. Got a stall she could hunker down in to complete her magnum opus?

Does anyone have any recommendations for a place I can go in January to write in solitude – requirements: must be (very) WARM, quiet, beautiful, in nature, not too expensive (ideally), with health-filled food available. I can fly anywhere in the world and I would be there for 2-4 weeks.

I’m looking for SPECIFIC suggestions of eco-resorts or healing places or homes – not general countries (“go to Italy!”) … and ideally an island or a beach place. Not that interested in Europe.

Thank you!!!

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So What Did I Miss?

notebook 3Going back home and trying to make the entire visit about her and/or enforcing her idea of “fun” on innocent family members and posting it to Facebook? Check.

Mining her high school years for more fascinating tidbits about herself to post to Facebook? Check.

Invading her brothers’ privacy by posting photos of him as a child, and photos of his infant child, and whining about why they aren’t closer on Facebook? Check. (Also, asshole, did it ever occur to you that you’re not closer because you are an insane over-sharing braying loudmouth and he is a normal human being who values his privacy?)

Lilly still looking utterly miserable? Check.

More dead Granny morbidness? Check.

Face looking weird? Check!

Am I missing anything?

Also, if you’ve been “self-reflecting” about being a better person for almost 20 years, and you’re still an asshole, maybe you need to self-reflect about your method of self-reflection and GO TO A SHRINK AND GET ON MEDS?? Just a thought.

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