My God, what an insufferable douchebag. “I thought you might be.”


1. If this is really about some poor stinky hippie who’s banging a donkey, then well done, stupid donkey. You’ve managed to overshare again but doing it as a conversation is just so edgy and writerly and OMG BRAVE and therefore not at all yet another example of you braying it to the hills as soon as some dumb tool sticks it in you. Idiot.

2. If it’s a recollection of some dumb tool from the past, ditto. Nice artistic over-sharing, smug idiot so proud that someone “fell in love” with you. Where are they now, however? Oh right — with sane women.

3. If it’s just something she’s made up for her book, my God she is possibly the cheesiest and most abysmal writer ever. Please make it stop.

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“What’s the Plan Now, Julia?” / And the Award Goes to … ME!


My momma is coming for her first visit to my place in SF this April, and I’m beside myself with excitement planning. Creating epic experiences for people I love is one of my favorite ways to channel my joy in this world.

This will not be a mainstream “sightseeing” visit. I want her to experience the healers, the artists, the music, the tribe, the ecstatic dance … the lifeblood of an open-hearted Bay area life – not the tourist traps.

What would you recommend?

Dunno, Julie.  Maybe a madcap musical number in the middle of the Castro?  An orgy conducted by Ringmaster Philippe Lewis? Just be sure to make it epic & ecstatic!  And not to worry, Robin Baugher ADORES smelly, unemployed hippies – she long abandoned any hopes of you marrying a fantastic, employed son of a powerful mom.


Update: Julia Allison spoke at a druggie fest, changed the world, and would like to thank The Academy:

I want to share publicly what I just sent in an email to Envision co-founder Stephen Brooks and producer Annie Coleman, who sherpa’d me in my first Transformational Festival talk – “Bringing the Message of Consciousness to the Mainstream.” It was a peak experience of my birthday, and of my year, and I wouldn’t be surprised if I looked back in 5 or 10 years on that 90 minutes and saw it as one of those Moments That Changed Everything.

If you ever have an opportunity to attend Envision Festival in Costa Rica, take it, take it, take it!


Hi Annie and Stephen!!

Please forgive me for the delay in this thank you … I only recently returned from Costa Rica (I took two more weeks after Envision to just sink deep into the healing atmosphere of the jungle and beaches … wow, I needed it!)

I wanted to reflect how impressed I was – once again – at your beautiful, caring, thoughtful work on the festival. I felt totally held and supported as a contributor, and I can tell you that the speech I gave that day was literally the best of my life, as measured by the connection I felt with the audience, the energy and vibrance of their response, and the spirit that flowed through me (I was full on channeling by the end – something I never do in my more mainstream entrepreneurial speeches).

LIT UP by the energy of Envision, I could FEEL the shift within me as I came into my power around imparting this message.

As it was my birthday, I told the audience that I had a birthday wish, but that they were the only ones who could help me with it. They agreed, and I told them that my wish was that something in my talk would change their lives forever for the better.

I truly believe that intentions set in such a powerful container WILL manifest, and I was almost in tears imagining the ripple effect. I know how powerful dancing on stage for Tipper and Phutureprimitive was for me in 2014, and dancing on stage for DJ Dragonfly and Random Rab was equally powerful for me this year.

SO THANK YOU. Thank you for trusting me to create magic at your festival. I will continue to be of service to Envision and the goals I know you have in spreading this important movement of consciousness.

Deeply, deeply grateful,

lazy asshole 2

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Soon, Donkey Will Ecstatically Dance For Us …

public dance

… and Ryan Swain’s parents will hopefully step in and have her committed.

The Church of Public Ecstatic Dance

I was walking on the beach near my house one beautiful Sunday, noticing the diversity of expressions of happiness; everywhere I looked, people had chosen disparate forms of play, from fetch with their dogs to kite surfing to laughing with their friends over a beer. Everywhere I looked, I saw a new form of joyous expression.

Except for one.

I didn’t see ANYONE – not a SINGLE HUMAN – dancing.


That seemed to me … Crazy. What kind of world do we live in that on a beautiful sunny Sunday at the beach no one is … dancing??

I was once asked the question “What do you want to make ridiculous?” At the time it was asked (five years ago), I didn’t know how to answer. Now I do. I could regale you with hours of what I want to make ridiculous … but in that moment on the beach I realized one of my missions here on this planet is to make it RIDICULOUS to be ashamed to dance in public.

Thus, my personal crusade to spark Public Ecstatic Dancing.

What is Public Ecstatic Dancing?

It’s something that began for me at Burning Man (of course, haha), where every permutation of self-expression is accepted and admired. Burning Man is literally the bastion of dancing to the beat of a different drummer.

But if we really want to live in a more beautiful world, what begins at Burning Man should be taken home.

So now, almost every single day, I dance in places no one else is dancing. I dance when I’m the ONLY one dancing. I dance with no music (that others can hear, at least – usually I have my iPod). I dance un-self consciously. I dance as if I’m in my living room … in public.

I dance to open my heart. I dance to work through emotions that are stuck in me. I dance to worship God. I dance to express gratitude for my healthy physical body. I dance because the music doesn’t let me stand still.

I dance because I am free, and I dance to BECOME free.

“But I’m not a dancer! I can’t dance.”

There’s no such thing.

One does not have to “be a dancer” – we simply ARE dancers. Are you alive? You can dance. In the last weeks of my grandmother’s life, she danced while in her hospital bed – with her hands.

Ecstatic dancing is simply moving one’s body in whatever way you choose – THERE ARE NO RULES. There are no steps. YOU CANNOT GET IT WRONG.
Do you feel the power in that? You. cannot. get. it. wrong.

Feel that in your body.

We live in a world that tells us we are getting it wrong all the f–king time. I’m telling you that you cannot possibly get this wrong.

And when you feel that in her heart, in your soma, you’ll feel true freedom. THAT is freedom.

Ecstatic dance is communing with your animal, your body, this vessel that holds your soul for the brief window on this planet … in a joyous way.

And making it public is a gift to EVERYONE who witnesses you. What you are communicating with them – without using words – is that you value radical, joyous free self expression. Your example GIVES THEM PERMISSION to go further with their own expression. Your freedom gives them permission to be free.

So today – or tomorrow – or next week – I encourage you … try it out. Try out Public Ecstatic Dance. Do a little sashay as you’re walking down the street. Raise your hands and move them as you listen to beats that move you. Grin and wiggle your hips. Shake that ass.

Tell me how you felt after. Did you feel scared? Did you feel nervous? Did you feel liberated?

Did your heart beat faster?


What, officer?  Oh, I’m just doing a little sashay in front of this federal building because Julia Allison told me if I grinned like an idiot and shook my ass in public, my life would magically transform and I’d reach the next level of ecstasy!  Won’t you join me for a little MGM musical comedy?  Just like real life!

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Julia Allison: An Ungrounded Girl Looking For Balance


Whew! Life’s rough when you’re just getting back from a three-week ayahuasca binge with the feminine collective and must rush to a wedding where the bride isn’t marrying herself:

One of my oldest friends Elly’s brother Steve just had a beautiful outdoor wedding in Marin. We’ve been friends since we were 12 – and I still call her dad “Mr. Benson.” Am I the only adult who still calls her friends’ parents “Mr.” or “Mrs.”??

BTW, I’m so exhausted, I’ve been sitting in my car in the garage for 20 minutes because I can’t muster up the energy to walk up 3 flights of stairs. Ummm … Can someone come over and carry me up? Please?

“Tee hee, I’m still just a wittle girl at heart and need a boy to rescue me!”  Never mind that the little girl is starting to look like someone’s tippling Aunt Ruth:

marriage 2

marriage 4

aunt ruth

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“Costa Rica, all girls, all fun … “

Sisters in Grift! From Annie Lalla’s “pimpin'” fauxto album:

lalla pimpin julie

pimp cart

lady shalotte

jena goddick



Edgy! Annie & sister Sacha share a moment alone, presumably before an hour of MDMA-fueled family therapy:

annie and sis

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