A New Addition to the RBD Family! Meet Gilly Blake, the Notorious Wag from Wilmette, with Spies Everywhere!

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As the eminently qualified Mulia Mallison moderates tonight’s LOL debate in oh so gay West Hollywood, Reblogging Donk is thrilled to introduce a new addition to our blogging team, Gilly Blake, the notorious wag from Wilmette. You’ve known this saucy dame under a few names over the years, and she’s given us many a juicy tidbit – you’ve probably even downloaded a couple. With fanfare, trumpets, and Franzia …

Oh my delicious dears, so good to be onboard! I come to report what we’ve already suspected: the suckers at St. Martin’s told “journalist” and expert on crappiness Julia Allison to either shit or get off the pot. My spies tell me that very few at the press even know about the dumb donkey’s proposed sacred scrapbook, and those who do could care less. However, a contract is a contract is a contract, as Gertrude Stein and our lazy girl no doubt explained to Momser before crowdsourcing for another pointless fauxtoshoot.

Pssssst, Julie! Stop dancing for us and chasing Avocado across God’s green earth and pick up that pen – we’re not talking yellow highlighter here!

P.S. Tidbits welcome at gillyblakejourno@yahoo.com

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Painting! Painting on White Walls Will Make a Person Happy!!!

This is a really random question but – does anyone have – or know of – a bare white wall that I could use to paint on for a photoshoot for my book?

I cannot wait for this fauxto shoot. Donk — will she be naked, trussed up in her Burning Man tutus, or will she have a “painter” costume on??? — her head tossed back, Zappos gaping-maw style, painting with joyous abandon on a bare white wall. Yes, I am sure the publishing company wants her to focus on “photo shoots” rather than actually writing the book. That’s always how it works.

“Never mind the prose! Just send us some photos! Be sure you look happy and hot!”

omgzappos

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And Now For Something Completely Different: Donk’s 73-Point Checklist

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Remember this? Just two years ago? And yet now she’s all “FREE LOVE!” and railing against the nuclear family. Oh honey. (LOL full head of hair re: Avocado).

Revisit this goodness, type-A haters:

Julia Allison’s 73-Point Checklist Because She Has So Very Much To Offer A Man

1. Loves me unconditionally
2. Kind / thoughtful / sweet / doting
3. Brilliant
4. Intellectual curiosity
5. Well-read / loves reading / reads The Atlantic, Fast Company, WIRED
6. Fascinating
7. Creative
8. Fantastic conversationalist
9. Can talk with him for hours and not run out of things to say
10. Handsome / tall / great body / will age well / full head of hair
11. Morally sound / honest / ethical
12. Dependable
13. Strong & consistent emotionally
14. Faithful / loyal
15. Good family values
16. Adventurous
17. Fun!
18. Hilarious / makes me laugh
19. Understands me
20. Great school / well-educated
21. Fantastic, close-knit, smart friends
22. Ambitious
23. Entrepreneurial
24. Generous
25. Financially responsible
26. Wonderful family / intact parental marriage
27. Chemistry (physical, intellectual, and emotional)
28. Wants to live in a warm climate (preferably Palo Alto)
29. Makes me feel secure and loved
30. Supports me emotionally
31. Chivalrous / impeccable manners
32. Preppy dresser
33. Enjoys playing tennis, horseback riding, skiing, biking
34. Would make a great dad and wants to have kids (would have beautiful, smart kids with me!)
35. Beautiful writer and speaker
36. Writes love letters
37. Well-traveled / wants to travel with me (in style!)
38. Spiritual / believes in God / has strong faith
39. Does good for others
40. Brings out the best in me / makes me a better person
41. A true teammate and partner
42. Has a close knit, fun, intelligent, interesting family who loves me
43. Is within five years of my age
44. Loves learning
45. Romantic
46. Always makes me feel special
47. Pushes me to be my best self
48. Can play piano or guitar brilliantly (or sing)
49. Healthy
50. Temperate and not into excessive drinking or irresponsible drug use
51. Teaches me interesting things every day
52. Inspiring
53. Respectful
54. Worldly
55. Is ready to get married in the next two years
56. Has a beautiful home / great eye for design
57. Owns a fast, sexy car
58. Confident
59. Talented lover
60. Balanced — values his work, friends, and hobbies (but I am top priority!)
61. Connected
62. Well-liked / beloved
63. Loves animals — especially Lilly!
64. 75% homebody, 25% enjoys swanky events
65. Politically liberal / socially liberal
66. Great photographer / likes taking photos
67. Loves a good costume party!
68. Joie de vivre
69. First marriage (never been married or engaged before)
70. Perceptive
71. Will support me in whatever I want to do
72. A good friend
73. Dreams big — and makes those dreams a reality

Posted in Uncategorized | 383 Comments

Donks Took Time Out Of Not Writing Her Book To Get Exposure For Photographers In The New York Times And Subsequently Brag About It

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And she’s looking for yet another photographer, because she doesn’t know any that have done any photo shoots for her recently, like the guy who shot her Coobies, the one she immediately forgot about. The last bit of the thread has since been deleted, maybe because she finally got a clue that she’s an obnoxious asshole. FYI, she is referencing this stupid, dumbfuck article about narcissistic dipshits.

Julia Allison
3 hours ago · Edited
I’m looking for a VERY talented, artistic, visionary professional photographer based in SF who would be willing to collaborate on a series of creative portraits on happiness for my book … any ideas?
LikeLike · Share
13 people like this.

Alyssa Keys Jazzwall Sharad
3 hours ago · Like · 1

Daniel Cohen I’m not very talented but you know where to find me if you need my help. Just no yoga poses!
3 hours ago · Like

Eleanor Tara Julia Maryanska or Ja Gold
49 minutes ago · Like

Julia Allison Daniel, you are VERY talented! I’m actually already going to use some of the photos we’ve taken And some we have yet to take!
25 minutes ago · Like

Genavieve Shingle Wendy K Yalom – she was just in the same NYT article
23 minutes ago · Like

Julia Allison She was in that article because I recommended her
22 minutes ago · Like · 1

Genavieve Shingle Of course you did, love
21 minutes ago · Like

She also posted this photo:

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Donkey Confesses She’s Too Dumb To Multi-Task

ohno2

WHY I MIGHT NOT REPLY ON FACEBOOK (MUCH) UNTIL NOVEMBER

I had a come to Jesus talk with myself this morning about the reality of my book deadline, and how that seems to be mutually exclusive with my propensity to say yes to EVERYTHING because, well, I like people and events and learning new things. However, that isn’t getting my book written.

So, below is my new auto-reply on my email, which also applies to FB messages.

As far as Facebook is concerned, I’m going to have to come up with some new rules about that, too. My book proposal (which was 85 pages) only got done when I deactivated. I’m not sure if that’s where I’m headed, but I know that I need to reduce my activity on here. I tend to be in a unusual camp which believes that Facebook is GENUINELY a source of love and light – at least with the friends and newsfeed I have right now – not a waste of time. But it still doesn’t allow me to go deep into writing mode. I pop out to see what you think, to get new ideas, to connect and to support. I still want to do all of these things, but it will have to be on a less regular basis.

I’m posting this because if I don’t reply to your FB messages, I want you to know why!

I am still attending Burning Man, but I’m going to try to cut out everything else (that I haven’t already agreed to attend).

Thank you for your support.

With love
julia

***********

Hello All!

So, as most of you already know, I am under contract to write a book called “Experiments in Happiness,” for St. Martin’s Press. That deadline is looming, and I have to take some drastic measures in order to ensure it is met.

I tried to write this book while also “doing life” and as it turns out, I wasn’t very good at it. As a result, I am completely clearing my calendar of ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that I haven’t already agreed to attend, support, or engage in (and even those events are being questioned right now).

To save everyone time, here are my new “rules”:

- IF this is a new request (interview, quote, blurb, speech, etc) and it is unpaid, unfortunately I will have to politely decline.
– IF this is an event, a dinner, a brunch, a party, or a meeting – I would love to attend, but I cannot. It sounds awesome, though.  Please start asking me again when you hear the jubilant news I have turned in the manuscript. (Not until November)
– IF this is a potential partnership or advisor-ship to your startup, I would love to hear more, but please email me again in November.
– IF this is an introduction, a date or a new friend – I am really excited to meet you, but it will have to be after the book is finished, in December, or, more likely, January 2015.
– IF this is from a friend or loved one and it is urgent, please text me. Otherwise, please forgive me for being MIA for the next few months. I promise I’ll make it up to you with energy and enthusiasm and love when I am finished.
– IF this is ABOUT the book, please re-send me an email with the subject line “BOOK”
– IF this is about a PAID engagement, please re-send me an email with the subject like “PAID”
– IF this is about an obligation I have already agreed to, I will honor my obligation, but please, if it’s not urgent, would you please let me know if it can be rescheduled to November/December/January?

Please know how much I would love to be engaged with you, but if I want to finish this book – and I do – I just can’t right now.

Thank you for being a part of my life.

With deep gratitude for your support,
Julia

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