Judy & Dodi Open Outdoor Restaurant In Marina del Bray

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"Glad you decided to dine at Chez Bland!"
“Will be that be a table for four, Miss Gilly?”

How long until Bernie & Ellen become very, very, very afraid for their son?

Bottom Picture: “Lilly sent me the Son of Sam! Must be because I was such a good mama to her all those years!”

“When I look into his eyes I see only love … and horrible New York City and carnage.”

168 COMMENTS

  1. Long time lurker…I am just going to say, hot damn I want this wedding to happen. She 1) looks like she is reverting back to Pancakes era Donk (she’s even wearing black tights! 2) her dress still is a bit too short (love it) 3) they look deliriously and delusionally happy. PLEASE SAY WE GET A CHRISTMAS ENGAGEMENT!!!!

    • Oh, it’s on, and a holibray engagement – Dodi is Jewish – seems highly probable. But can a scientist with a legit job incorporate the likes of Jena la Flamme, Eben Pagan, and Ali Shanti into his life?

          • I’ve been so bored for SOOOOO long. The “Rainblow” era needs to be retired already….so looking forward to FINALLY live out the “married donk” years!

          • But you’ll get bored with that too. My kittens are always SO eager for the next shiny Donkey. winky emoticon

    • I do ***NOT*** want a wedding. Her smug will be off the charts, especially since he’s a doctor and not Z-list dirt festival knob twiddler.

      • Not even a Burning Man wedding, with Robin and Petey in their jammies, Tim Ferrit & Eben Pagan honoring the couple, and Jess Magic serenading them with her vocal thrush?

        • Nope. As I said, the smug will be off the charts and she will never let anyone forget that someone actually married her and that he’s a doctor

          • but imagine the fun of psychotic donkey divorce and a deranged custody fight over the foals

            look beyond the wedding, that’s all she wants anyway. she can’t be married to someone over the long term. it is to laugh!

        • Then she falls back in love with trustfunder James Fay, breaking up his marriage in the process. It’s a rom-com waiting to happen!

      • I could enjoy the wedding festivities, but I’m not getting my hopes up too high because I made that mistake (mistakes were made!) with Debbin and, even more tragically, with BOOK, and she fucked that up both times. She is that much of a self-sabotaging moron.

        Wedding or no wedding, trust, either of these doors will deliver fun to the basement. Same goes for the third door, behind which is a tiger (onesie).

  2. i mean… iโ€™m glad she wore an appropriate dress to family thanksgiving but WTF with the cookie sheet vegetable photo shoot. that seems like a great way for your vegetables to get cold.

    she looks happy. but iโ€™ve been watching this show so long that only fills me with apprehensive dread.

    • Engagement, wedding, Judy’s cryptic hints that Dodi isn’t satisfying her every wish, OMG! baby, an affair with yet another dirtfest DJ, more cryptic hints about trouble in paradise, another affair, Dodi is forced to write a breakup post, divorce – we’ll have copy for years!

      • But look, almost matches her nails, did you notice, her nails are similar color to dress, see, let me hold them out for you in a photo in an almost Baliesque yoga prayer pose but not quite so prayerful that nails don’t show.
        But where book, or dog? Let’s here the truth about dog repent before vows

  3. It would be such a cliche to say I’m grateful, but I’m unable to have any original thoughts of my own so why would I say anything else?

    • Save those thoughts for the breakup post that Judy will force us to write – “She’s truly happy and we’re happy for her. RBD and Donk will always be in each other’s lives as friends.”

  4. The Coobie bra and the old Chanel purse is, hands down, the most ridiculous combo this burro has put together and that is saying a lot as weโ€™ve seen her in a rainbow necktie + pasties.

    I was in LA on Thanksgiving Day Ave it was not opaque black tights kind of weather. Oh, Donks…

    • Before we knew who this guy was, we saw that pic of her going to the opera with him in that stupid too tight fit and flare dress and the giant necklace and white fake fur jacket, and the white platform clompers.

      Didnโ€™t she claim in that stupid piece about Sex and the City ruining her life that she had put away all of her Chanel purses and crap like that? Of course now is the time to drag her cheap status symbols out again to impress the family.

      She will never change. We can tell just by how she changes her costumes to suit the occasion. Clearly she is conflicted today between the trappings of Bali free spirit and republican housewife.

      Enjoy the veggies you made, Donkey. Is that a leather purse?

    • Easter Kinder Whore was my favorite What-the-fucking-hell Donkey outfit

    • The purse is the best part. Shes’s a hippie free spirit you guys, but see she comes from class. “oh this old thing?”

      also, I think her hair is looking the healthiest its looked in a while.

      • Anyone from real money would never be caught dead with such an obvious status object as a logo bag. Real money people are much more subtle and don’t feel the need to prove it to the rest of the world

        • One of my wealthiest friends has NEVER worn/sported designer clothing/objects of any kind. As a matter of fact, he’s gone to great lengths to avoid looking like an advert.

          • That’s because they want to avoid Donkey types and other leeches

    • Totally. Ten years ago she would not have given this guy a second glance, which is ridiculous, because he’s a much bigger catch than she is and he could actually probably land an intelligent, attractive, sane woman who’s not severely mentally ill, a pathological liar and an attention junkie. I pity this Son of Sam fool. The crazy will emerge soon enough, hopefully after the wedding though.

  5. Iโ€™m becoming very, very, very scared that she will try to get pregnant ASAP to lock him in, or at least after the wedding. If so, that poor child never stands a chance.

    • Maybe future brother-in-law Adam Saunders, actor/producer/writer? Our little burro is finally going Hollywood! Next week, a meeting with Ashton on bringing The Mulia Mallison Story to network TV.

    • Looking at bottom pic, I cringe thinking how much sand Dodi Berkowitz got in his oil-stained vintage Sears loafers, so that Donka could have an Instagrammable moment.

      The first in a long line of sacrifices that await him…

        • Have you SEEN Yulia’s shoes over the years? Or in that top photo? Girl can’t choose a nice pair of kicks to save her life so no reason her boyfriend should either.

          (Disclaimer: I once accidentally on purpose had sex with a dude who wore socks & sandals when we went out together. He was good looking & had a big dick tho so I gave him a pass. He just had really bad taste in footwear. Actually, now I think about him, he was English: enough said.)

          • Gilly, you just made me google Paul bloody Carr, for old times sake. I’d forgotten he was involved in that Pandodaily bullshit website with Sarah Lacey – and it was funded by Peter Thiel! I’m sure this is news to no-one but me, but wheels within wheels. Interesting.

          • He was one of Donk’s big white nits. I’ve been cataloging old posts and stumbled across his name in posts from 2009, in which he was defending our burro’s honour and trashing this site. I’d completely forgotten about the clown.

          • Self-hating Czechs tend to think that socks in sandals are a Czech invention and specialty, but I never understood where they got that from. So self-centered.

    • Can you imagine showing up at your new boyfriendโ€™s parentsโ€™ house and demanding people take photos of you for your facebook? That has to be awkward. Itโ€™s not like she is some 21 year old influencer, she is a pushing 40…what does she do again?

      • She is a consultant to global companies and also monitors her cryptocurrency investments. At least this is what she tells her parents.

        • If so, I’m wondering how they reconcile that with having to pay for her upkeep

  6. Why bother with bars on the windows then let the grifter in the front door?

    Also, bars on the windows? I’m gonna need AFF to handle this one.

  7. Where are her eyes? It’s worrisome.

    Sister is a movie producer and also went to Harvard.

    I wonder if Judy is going to go back to Bali or just hang out at Latka’s until Craymas.

  8. Did they eat outside? Why would you take food outside before serving it? Why is it still on a cookie sheet? Do they not have serving dishes?

  9. I canโ€™t tell whatโ€™s going on with donkeyโ€™s back feet โ€ฆ Are those two-tone horseshoes?

    Also, Latkaโ€™s already-baggy clothes are kind of alarming, if you think about how gaunt Derpin was at the end of his boyfriend contract…

    • That’s been disturbing me too. Are the slide on tennis shoes with a tan sole? If I were his parents I would automatically think this is a girl that needs help. Head to toe help.

    • In one of the Thanksgiving pics and the marina del bray pic, you can see the shoes (?) have a trio of reflective circles as part of the design. Probably some cheap espadrilles from Bali.

    • Is this the guy from the open relationship? The one that caused massive insecurities and she Instagrammed that bizarro rap video she recorded?

      • That was a studly Hispanic artisanal shoe salesman called Ro Palomo. I think? He’s on her Facebook.

        What’s with Jaahass’s perma-hats and scarves? If she’s got alopecia or psoriasis, I get it, but for people who constantly promote themselves as teachers and influencers, they seem incredibly insecure.

        I guess any physical flaw or ailment means they’re not sufficiently manifesting their evolved consciousnesses. Own your scabies, Woo Goddesses!

    • Good lord, someone take pity on this woman and get her some good eye cream. She looks like she actually uses sand for eye cream.

  10. They don’t look like they are in love to me. I’m not an expert or anything. They look like two people who are making the best of it. Two people who are “grateful” to not be alone. It’s fine. New relationship. They don’t have to be in love. But it just seems a bit much to parade it around like the greatest love. Is this all to get back at the DJ? And was it the DJ who recently went back and apologized to his ex for his terrible behavior?

  11. Why didn’t Judy make her famous Thanksgiving sweet potatoes?

    yams

    Maybe Momser’s trip to Bali was to help Judy fake normal behavior, but one day soon, perhaps the next holibray, Judy will be regaling the Latkas with her expertise in architecture, Hollywood, and Harvard, where, as we know, she was mistaken for a pre-frosh whilst “looking over” HBS. But, if she does manage to get the ring and free accommodations, Momser can get a Harvard hat to go with the MIT hat.

        • I had to google Latka. But I’ve been meaning to tell you, Gilly, some of those categories are brills. I love Fingernails & Erudition and Food & Sips, among others.

          • Thanks, Helena! I’ve been going through old posts whenever I get a couple of free minutes, deleting dead links and cataloging by subject. It’ll take forever and some categories will merge/be deleted but certainly not “Fingernails & Erudition.”

  12. I’m sorry…I am HOWLING in LOLs right now. They look related and their kids will be unfortunate in so many ways. This is a picture that screams “If you can’t have the one you want…” Merry Xmas to the Basement, indeed!

  13. Look him up on YouTube. He is a serious nerd (which is cool) who seems like he has serious social engagement issues. This is success!

  14. In all seriousness, if Alex’s friends or family are reading here, something to consider: Encourage Alex to wait at least 1 year, maybe 2 before getting into marriage. And do encourage him to use reliable contraception. JA has notoriously not been a contraceptive user by her own admission. And she has also had numerous issues that have been very public that most people would worry about: disclosing a partner’s mental health diagnosis (see REDACTED/bipolar); demanding exes buy her laptops (he didn’t); generally losing most of her friends repeatedly for all kinds of poor choices and bad behavior; unfairly using Jack M’s photos on her TV show; sending out fake press releases about herself and various men over the years; going through guys’ phones and emails; and all kinds of other beyond bad behavior. She successfully fawns over people in the beginning and it works…for awhile. However, her behavior in friendships and romantic relationships has worried many people.

    This isn’t to trash her. This is to say that Alex seems like a nice, very smart, and a very passionate guy. He lights up when talking about his work. He may sometimes find social situations tricky (just a guess). But he seems pretty great in many ways. If Julia ends up being a good fit for him, I wish them all the best. But given what many of us have long seen happen with her… encouraging him to wait 1-2 years before making a life commitment is a wise idea.

    • Revealing private conversations that Jack M shared re: his doubts about his career. Issuing a press release after he kicked her out and wanted nothing to do with her that implied they were more serious than they ever were. Calling D.S. a โ€œbase modelโ€ in front of him on a radio show and trying to change him to be more like what she wanted him to be. We could go on and on for paragraphs.

      Do not let her get involved with his career. She has no lifeโ€™s purpose and always tries to manipulate her partner to do what she thinks is better. Experience her day to day and not long distance for at least six months for the wheels to start coming off. Donโ€™t let her take his focus off his work, because she will try. She is a black hole of need.

      • To be honest, I don’t even think she’s focused on AM. I suspect she’s more taken in by his connections to Sean Parker et al.

        Makes me sad to say that, but we’ve all seen her show for many years now.

        • The proximity of Parker took me back to the CollegeHumor daze, when she was trying to cozy up to Ricky Van Veen after [Redacted] introduced her to that crew.

        • She loves connections like that, and she loves dangling her connections as bait. Oh Avocado, I can get your music used on NYFW runways. Oh Derpin, I can get you private chef jobs with big deal entrepreneurs. Oh Chad, I will manage your tour and get you photographed and styled by the biggest names in the biz. Etc.

    • To add to that:
      1-2 years of actually seeing one another in person. Not living in different countries. That is likely how she got Jack M to hang out with her for a while – they didn’t live in the same place. Separation can create longing which is a good way to get someone to want you and profess all kinds of love and commitment. But if she is truly someone he is considering for a long term partner, then he should set some healthy boundaries and NOT let her move in with him (unless he has a rental lease in which case maybe they can part ways amicably when it all goes downhill, which it’s likely to do).

      Many of us have seen her scary behavior over the years and the many many times she’d had a public breakdown online or in emails to exes or former friends and then sworn she’s changed and then it’s the same badb behavior all over again.

      I don’t know him but if he’s kind and nice and smart (and vulnerable) do encourage him to be smart in his personal life too.

      • Did she not also sic Dadsers on people from this site, including tattling to people’s employers? Do I recall that she and Debbie were also behind another fake “lawyerly” letter?

        Oh, and remind me to get her to pay a few thousand for my birthday party.

        • She also sicced Dadsers on people who had nothing to do with this site

          • She and Megan Lasagna contacted a lurker who had joined SAVE RBNS on Facebook when David Karp briefly shuttered an earlier version of this blog. The woman had never even commented on RBNS! The dastardly duo chanced to see her name when it cycled through as as one of the six people whom FB showcased as members – the group was private but not really. Gotta love Scukerberg! Anywoo, Donk called this reader at her place of business! The woman, a paralegal, contacted Dadsers and let him have it.

    • She demanded the ex buy her a laptop *after* she’d TWICE publicly (once a widely read blog) claimed that he’s bipolar, refuses to take his meds, and doesn’t bathe (not that she’s a paragon of hygiene these last few years).

      When he balked, she got bitchy and sniped that he should stop trying to play the role of victim <– this all took place in email that was forwarded and wound up on a blog

      • – kept sending nude photos of herself to Debbois long after he got a new gf
        – how are we forgetting the balls-to-the-wall mental emails to Rain’s family after their conscious uncoupling? This is what Dr. Berkowitz’s folks can look forward to.

        • Itโ€™s also what she was obsessed with over the whole last year in Bali instead of โ€œoh, last Thanksgiving I was deep in prayer and at a silent retreat.โ€ Instead she was calling and texting Rain multiple times a day, demanding that he still pay attention to her because of the โ€œnow, always, foreverโ€ handcuffs she wanted to shackle him with, and then desperately trying to become friends with his new GF just to mine her for information about what he was saying about her so she could use it against him in โ€œI WILL NOT BE IGNORED!โ€ fashion. And then emailing his family and interfering in their family dynamic by revealing the most personal confessions Rain had shared with her. It was as sick as the sickest shit sheโ€™s ever pulled.

          She had a mental breakdown of a year, and now she is spinning it as some blessed religious experience.

          Run, Latka, run!

          • Right. The Laptopgate is one of the cornerstones of the Donkey show, but it happened about 27 years ago (it’s worrisome that we still care!). The ILYR shit has been going on in the past 12 months. That is the emotionally healthy pushing 40 burro she is today.

            And I didn’t even know she tried to befriend Rain’s new piece, but of course.

          • She pulled the same crap with Rain that she pulled with Pancakes, namely stealing his passwords and looking through FB and email and text messages, so he dumped her raft ass for the last time. And then, as you note, things got really weird, including up to 40 text messages a day and lots of lurid fauxtos. As this nutbars behavior was going on earlier this year, I doubt much has changed, regardless of Donkey being SO IN LOVE for the umpteenth time.

          • One of the craziest moments was when she flipped out and ripped into Rain because he had the audacity not to call her on her birthday this past February, six months after he moved out and was involved with another woman, and after sheโ€™d harassed him for months. And then the next day, she was photographed leaping in the air with balloons in front of some monastery, as if she hadnโ€™t a care in the world. Sicko.

        • Wow. I am pretty well versed in Donkology but I didn’t know that she kept sending nudes to an ex who’d moved on to someone else.

    • You’re also almost certainly correct

  15. Oh Judy, it’s possible to have an “athletic” build and NOT look like a lampshade. That fit-and-flare is for tiny-and-cute, not brick-shithouse. I’m also a tall gal with rugby player shoulders and legs – protip: Go up 2 sizes and get someone to tailor the waist and hip. Or learn to sew, you shiftless bint.

    You looked very nice in well-fitted jeans and shirts. Do that again.

    • OMG, I just noticed that her little dress has a ribbon tie at the necklineโ€ฆ
      Donkey, grow the fuck up!

    • And in that top picture, what the hell is going on with the cream-colored loopty loop hanging out on her right side, is that the ribbon provided for securing an article of clothing on a hanger? If so, itโ€™s a fair guess that his family/the fauxtog hate her already.

    • She’ll never size up nor acknowledge that she’s not a tiny-n-cute

  16. I just had a thought after watching the Wired video with Sean Parker and Latka. The vast majority of Donkeyโ€™s tribe believes in quack woo therapies (calcified pineal gland, etc.), are anti-vax, anti GMO.

    Alexโ€™s field is genetic engineering. He goes into cells and copies and pastes genes. And okay, so it is in an attempt to cure cancer and other human diseases. But this is exactly what GMO is, but for crops.

    I have to wonder how this will go over with the woo set. Or will they just be snowed because Sean Parker is involved?

    • If she thinks she can get Latkas to take her hoof in wedded bliss and/or create an in with Sean Parker, she’ll blow past those woos like they’re a roadside Stuckey’s

    • Good Lord, the woos are shameless opportunists, not critical thinkers with integrity, despite buzzwords like “authenticity” and transparency.” Many of them are scrounging by, which is why they genuflect at the feet of the woos who do have money and/or access to power. Dodi won’t be a problem in Wooville. Plus, didn’t Ryan Allis facilitate this unholy union?

    • I could only make it through about 1/4th of this endless profile, but Dunham seems as needy as Judy and as intent on oversharing as our burro back in the day. Judy doesn’t believe in borders – I’m quoting from the donkey’s mouth – so I assume she tells members of her tribe EVERYTHING, often embellished, sometimes not.

    • maybe it’s this:
      โ€œI texted Jack last week and said, โ€˜HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE DATED SOMEONE EVERYBODY HATES?โ€™

  17. Oh man. Donk’s in heaven today as her favorite latka is quoted in her favorite paper. He weighs in on the news that a doc in China claims to have succesfully gene edited human embryos ‘It’s scary’.
    Of course its just that 1 quote from him while other experts are cited multiple times throughout the piece, but nice work Donk! How much credit is she taking for it I wonder…

  18. I see them getting married, then going down in flames when Donk’s mental health issues flare up and don’t seem so “adorkable” anymore.
    See also: Cary Randolph Fuller and her ex-hubby.

    • The most likely scenario. Those initial flames will spark early in the marriage, if they haven’t become evident already. We’ll see many fauxtos of a haggard Dr. Dodi attempting to smile while his wife brays and brays and brays …

      • “Darling I thought we agreed you wouldn’t wear the nipple covers to my work functions anymorrrrreeee!”
        Followed by “No, she wouldn’t like another drink, my wife has had enough haven’t you darling????”

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