Updated: Eat, Bray, Love: Play “A Grifter’s Prayer” With Donkey Allison

The plastic signage apparently wasn’t enough. Now Donkey, along with her non-lesbian lover, has to parrot inthpirational slogans using flowers, or make the indigenous population create them for her.

We miss Judy’s inthpirational words, too! Maybe if we play creatrix and compose prayers based on Judy’s “spirituality,” she’ll once again grace the globe with her online presence, rather than hide behind Ryan Allis’s skirts? Winner receives plant medicine, four chocolate bars, a case of Franzia, a date with Elizabeth Gilbert (too soon?) and a $50 gift certificate to Flavors, Devin Stetler’s Riverbank weed shop!

Update: The late great Cuntbunnies would be so proud of our dear Razzmatazz!

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79 Responses to Updated: Eat, Bray, Love: Play “A Grifter’s Prayer” With Donkey Allison

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

      I’m hoping he and Judy hook up when she pops in as a guest instructor at Yoga Barn. Despite knowing of Marc Gafni’s predatory past, she wanted him to officiate her wedding to herself. Thus, I can’t imagine our burro would be put off by charges of sexual harassment and rape against Simmons.

      • Eff You $$$ says:

        Does anyone have a link to the original fake yoga photos following Donk’s flight back from Davos with the married guy? Could this have started it all???

        • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

          Is it this one?


          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

            I’m not sure. There were several photos taken in relation to the Yoga Donkey piece in the NYT, which was post Davos and published when she was still banging Debbie Seltzer.

          • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

            Yeah that’s the original fauxga shot. The wife of the dude with the airplane was a yoga instructor.

          • The Nose Knows says:

            and the guy was really into yoga, too

          • Tingolayo says:

            I think that is INDEED the original, pre-Derpin fauxga fauxto. The “Busy Busy Journalith Is Thuper Thuper Down-to-Earth!” piece of trash for HuffPo online (?) featured a thuper thuper theriouth concentrating bucktooth face with a glimpse of Derpin’s wraithlike bod in the frame, IIRC.

            And then they ate vegan snacks made by a vegan chef!!! which, who cares, even French fries and ketchup are vegan, so shut up.

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

            I thought the Judy & Debbie-in-the-background fauxga piece was for the NYTimes, and it could have been online only.

            The Nose Knows, the pilot was apparently into burros too. Ba donk donk!

          • The Nose Knows says:

            When will guys learn to not fuck the crazy? It’s almost never worth it. Even more so when the guy is married

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        Lol, even with his deserved bad rep, he can pull way better than A Donkey.

    • "Pilot" is the new "keynote" says:

      I can see her chasing him – it’s not like she has any other prospective wallets, especially none that minted. She’d also get to recast herself as a champion of interractial love and multiculturalism, write about how she overcame her white Winnetka wealthy roots because she was just so virtuous at her core, etc. Good thing he wouldn’t look twice at her.

      • Stalker does not consent to Michael Ellsberg says:

        Russell has no time for thots.

        Also Julia is way too racist to date him.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

          Nah, not so much — remember when DeDonk tried to get mods here to reveal that she was dating DeStorm?

          She wasn’t, of course, because he never’d her raft ass, but she must have been preemptively hiking a back leg.

          • Stalker does not consent to Michael Ellsberg says:

            And I know she dated that black politician.

            Wasnt’ DeStorm during the Miss Advised time? I think she was just trying to scrape more fame.

            God that DeStorm thing reminds me of when Paris Hilton was hanging out with those rappers. And Paris Hilton is racist as fuck. I don’t know why I’m thinking about this. I have a cold and my brain isnt’ working right.

            ANYWAY. yeah she’s into fame and Russell is famous so she might overcome her racist breeding for that.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            We’re both right. Or wrong. Famous & monied is fine; common people need not apply unless they happen to be in the business of making videos &/or taking fauxtos.

  1. Donkey's Calcified Pineal Gland says:

    More appropriate to the previous post than this one, but I am again amused at Donkey’s Columbusing, this time of wearing natural hair, no makeup and comfy non-synthetic clothing. Thank Greg she has people around her like Cory to convince her to ditch her fake eye pelts. Way to be a trailblazer, Donkey!

    • Wolf, Hemmningway & Khaat Whores says:

      The problem with ditching the pelts is that a member of the local fauna may eat them and die of acute polyester poisoning.

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

      So she listens to “Christopher Life” but not to Ali Shanti? Speaking of the old raunch, she just declared that she’s nuttier than a fruitcake but only because of the insane world we live in. She’s now blaming you, me, and the entire planet for her batshit crazy woo self.


      • Tingolayo says:

        Because I am an old, I need to ask: what’s that pursed-lip, chin down, eyes looking up pose that All the Girls who are like half Scamti’s age always do, and where did it come from? I’ve never seen a middle-aged mom do it, until now.

        • Walk? Not bloody likely says:

          I too am an old, and that’s the face I sometimes see when I’m trying to take a photo with my phone but accidentally put it on selfie mode. I’m not legit ugly or decrepit (neither is she) but the quizzical-scrunched-droopy face is not my favorite, and I certainly wouldn’t have it on social media.

          My question to Ali would be; no makeup, fine, but why put those godawful falsies on, then post a pic of yourself before you slap on some BB cream and a spot of colour? 1/10 needs more effort, see me after class.

          Their Woo social media vanity confuses the hell out of me. Spend your life posing and photoshopping yourself, but then have an emotional meltdown for attention whore points (I assume that’s what she’s doing), where you look like Wendy from Breaking Bad after a rough night in the parking lot?

        • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

          No idea, but that middle-aged mom doing the girl pose is now posting a live webcast every Friday in which she rambles on and on and on about what it means to be a grown up. I just kant.

          • Wolf, Hemmningway & Khaat Whores says:

            I don’t care what she is saying, I just can’t stop looking at the turkey feathers and wondering how they became attached to her head.

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

            I just noticed all the turkey feathers hanging in the background! Does she kill and skin those poor birds in the backyard so that she has a ready supply of feathers?

          • The Nose Knows says:

            She molts. That’s where the feathers come from

  2. Morrocanwear on a Vacay says:

    I for one very appreciate her spelling out words with flowers. Very appreciate indeed!

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

      Clearly our burro’s time spent reflecting on herself while vacationing at Firefly Farms has led to a flurry of creative activity.


  3. Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

    Honestly, she looks happier, more natural, and less posed in that photo than she has in years. But as far as I know, she’s never apologized to any of the people she’s wronged, harassed, and fucked over in the past decade-plus. Until then, I’m not buying it.

    • Tingolayo says:

      With softness, Rat, she’s still posing and that’s still a costume.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Look at how when crossing her arms across her body. It’s very unnatural.

      • Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

        That’s true. You and the person below have a point when you say she’s trying to make her arms look thin.

        It’s a far cry from NYFW in prom dresses, but I suppose she really never will change.

    • Walk? Not bloody likely says:

      I’ll concede that she actually looks happy, but that’s the “has cleavage but thin arms” pose. The other one is bracing herself and sucking her midriff in so hard, she’s going to pull a muscle.

      This picture is annoying on so many levels. “We’re privileged white women in a developing country for weeks on end. How shall we spend a few hours? Leave our luxury resort and go find a volunteering project we can help at?” “Nah, let’s heal the world’s ills by decimating some local flora and posing attractively for Facebook likes.”

      Here you go, Donkey, let me help you:https://www.volunteerbali.org/orphanage-volunteer-project/

  4. Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

    Not long until Birthcray!

  5. Razzmatazz says:

    TripAdvisor reviews for this place reveal that the restaurant changes the flower messsge every day. So this is basically like taking a picture next to a poster that strikes your fancy at the Successories location at your local mall.

  6. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

    Donkey just gave Ali Shanti’s most recent post a thumbs up. The old raunch goes on and on about how downing pitchers of ayahuasca turned into the totally aligned goddess she is today. The post then turns into a shill. I hate these people.

    “As you may know, the plant medicine Ayahuasca had a huge impact in my life.

    Before: I was able to reach all of the forms of external success possible, but each time I got “there” I found nothing but emptiness.

    During: I discovered why that was. 1) My success-climbing was built on the backs of others rather than a world that works for everyone, 2) I was seeking validation outside of myself, but couldn’t seem to find it within, and 3) my heart was totally numb and closed off, and my mind was in full control, quite painfully.

    After: I’ve created a fully aligned life, united my mind and heart, able to bring compassion and forgiveness to myself and others, no longer need external validation (though I do welcome and can receive it when it shows up), and I’m living into a world that works for everyone with my everyday choices and actions in life and business.

    I understand some folks have not had good experiences with ayahuasca.

    I believe that is because some containers are not solid enough and because there is often no (or insufficient) integration support.

    And so when I saw that my sister Kim Iglinsky and Aniko Benedek were hosting a medicine retreat to Peru, I had to sit with the question of whether to share it.

    After doing so, I feel clear that if you are a woman considering Ayahuasca, that this could be the time and place for you to welcome Grandmother into your life.

    Alive and Awake Retreat – a women’s medicine retreat in Peru on April 3-13th, 2018

    Please reach out to Kim Iglinsky direct if interested. With love.”

    • Meh or Feh says:

      My grandmother welcomed me with fresh-baked Toll House cookies.

    • Dirty DJs Done Dirt Cheap says:

      “I was able to reach all the forms of external success possible” lol

      Like, you know…bankruptcy, being the worst mom ever, renting a dump in west Boulder, fucking lunatic dentists

      Sounds a lot like THIS IS SUCCESS

      • Grammarian Dreams of Spring says:

        towel curtains

        • Frequent Liar Miles says:

          Coat ghouls.

          • Wolf, Hemmningway & Khaat Whores says:

            Plywood floors, relationshiptmi website…

            The list is endless.

          • Telexfree Antofagasta says:

            That Craig guy.

            BTW how awkward must it be when Ali’s live-in husband passes you in the towel corridor while looking for lube and coke?

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

            How awkward it must be when you’re Kaia’s boyfriend and you’re living with her family and her mother, clad only in panties and turkey feathers, stops in to pee when you’re taking a shower.

            “Don’t get upset! We’re all family here. Mind if I get in the shower with you? I feel dirty all over!”

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        More turkey feathers per capita than the entire state of Iowa?

  7. Never ever breaking up or getting a job says:

    Cunt Bunnies forever.

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