Dirtfest Donkey Helps Bring Jim Jones To HIVE L.A.

I’m back, bunnies! Above is a fauxto of Donk, Rain, and John “Like Buttah” Buttaz at this year’s Lightning in a Bottle dirtfest. You might remember Buttaz working with Jess Johnson to put together various “Garden of Eden” drugfests in Encinitas, including the Halloween orgy that Donkey attended in glitter face.

When at Lightning in a Bottle, Buttaz helped to facilitate a recreation of Jim Jones’s Kool-Aid mass suicide:

Donkey presumably introduced Buttaz to manboy Ryan Allis when at Lightning. Last week Buttaz recreated the Jones mass suicide at Allis’s HIVE L.A.:

Is that Julie at the end of the 15-second video? Did she drink the Kool-Aid? If not Donkey, did our burro attend HIVE L.A.? She’s been scrubbed from the contributor page, but the old girl is tight with Allis and his piece. She even gave him a thumbs up when Ryan told us – OMG! – he just became a Certified Life Coach!

Re: the endless vacation from vacation-itis, Donkey must be assisting Allis with travel plans:

More soon, but first I want everyone to say hello to my lovely assistant, Rhoda. She’s been reading RBD for years and has unearthed many donkey droppings in the last 18 months, including everything in this post. I thought it was high time Rhoda be given some credit!

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88 Responses to Dirtfest Donkey Helps Bring Jim Jones To HIVE L.A.

  1. Fieierce Mani says:

    Thank you Gilly! And welcome Rhoda!!

  2. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    “Beautifully decorated” coming from A Donkey gives one pause: so, brown acrylic wookie-fur bedding and crayoned (misspelled, 8 1/2 x 11″) inspirational posters?

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      P.S.: Thanks, Gilly!

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        P.P.S.: What is this “rp” payment to which she refers? Reciprocal Pandering? I am old and cannot keep up with the new currencies.

    • dr. cupcake cray cray says:

      Also the place must be “cleaning.” Not “must have weekly cleaning” or even “must be clean.” Just “cleaning.”

      And the Google machine tells me RP is the Indonesian Rupiah.

      • Helena (Kismet Shamanatrix, CEO of PriestessSensei Inc.) says:

        Cleaning places are the best. You just found a newfound exemplary example.

        • Frequent Liar Miles says:

          God, I forgot about that paean to Robin and her homemaking talents when Donkey was in the ecstatic throes of creating her comfy & delightful home (where she would host various philanthropical endeavors.) I think they have barely spoken in the past several years since.

          • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

            They’ve always gone through periods of not speaking, even back during the New Trier and Georgetown daze, and Robin froze out Donkey for a good six months after checking out RBD.

          • Helena (Kismet Shamanatrix, CEO of PriestessSensei Inc.) says:

            I don’t understand why an embodiment of love who comes from a perfect family where her parents are still married would not have a nonstop lovely and harmonious relationship with her mother.

            After all, she was inside.

  3. JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

    Didn’t she illegally try to Air Bnb one of her apartments? Is she banned from using it? Is that why she needs to post this dumb query instead of just using the fucking Internet?

    Proclaiming oneself a life coach is one of the greatest scams of the 2000’s.

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

      She and Grape Nehi most certainly AirBNB’d the OMG! marina apartment, violating the terms of their lease and getting tossed out onto the street by the owners. The owners filed legal documents re: Donkey’s violation of the rental agreement, but I don’t remember the outcome.

    • Aggressively Stupid says:

      At first I thought that AirBnB doesn’t operate in Indonesia, but a quick Google shows me that they do and have several full houses available more or less to the stated specifications. Then I did another search and learned that she’s looking for a full house with amenities for between $600-1,000 USD per month in one of the most popular vacation spots in the world. LTR: Cheap Donkey is cheap.

  4. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

    OT: Got $500 laying around? Why not join Nisha Moodley and her besties as they allegedly discuss “inclusivity”? At least that was the original reason given for this “magical” event. Note: no such thing is listed in Noodles’ ad. “Lunch, dinner, and spa included.” I would fucking hope so.

    G A T H E R W I T H U S
    • a soft place to land & be real •

    January 12
    12 women
    Mill Valley, CA

    Join me and my dear friend Ginny Muir for a full-day gathering with a group of 12 women.

    We’ll dive into real connection together, eat gorgeous healthy food prepared by Rachel Rossitto, soak & sauna at a magical spa in the redwood forest, move our bodies and do a breathwork practice together, and if you desire, Ginny and I will offer our loving reflections around your deepest yearnings.

    NATURE
    BREATH
    SELF
    SISTERS

    Come as you are.
    Let’s cry until we laugh.
    There will be snacks.

    $500 (or 2-payments $275)
    Lunch, dinner & spa included.

    REGISTER HERE:
    bit.ly/gather-2-payments
    bit.ly/gather-pay-in-full

    ✨ If you feel the pull, I hope you’ll come melt with us.
    ✨ If you have a Bay Area sister, tag her below to spread the word. Thanks!

    • Narcissistic Personality Disorder says:

      Just gross. It is probably at someone’s home. $6000 they will pocket minus the minimal overhead. They have no real expertise or credentials. I feel sad for the women who fall prey. We will be sisters as long as you pay me.

      • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

        Noodles is fucking desperate. She tagged Rebecca Jean, Rebecca Thieneman (Ryan Allis’s piece), and several other white women in the comments. Enjoy discussing “inclusivity” during spa time, ladies!

        I’m proud to say I never gave this fraud a pass.

        • Donkey's Calcified Pineal Gland says:

          She’s just figured out a way to travel to exotic places and be pampered on other people’s money. She gets comped for bringing so many people with her. Then she waves around some burning sage and blows sunshine up their skirts and calls it a day. She isn’t very bright and is awfully naïve. I wonder how long Mr. Novowels will take before he sees through her schtick.

    • Helena (Kismet Shamanatrix, CEO of PriestessSensei Inc.) says:

      Is it just me, ir is this absolutely insane on every level? Yes, I will pay money to spend a weekend in a FOREST gathering with a group of strangers, two of whom are depicted laughing maniacally. Oh, I can also SOAK AND SAUNA with them? Magical! I want to share all my deepest yearnings with that circle!

      • Morrocanwear with Antlers says:

        I might be willing to pay the$500 for the pleasure of crossing my arms , rolling my eyes and glaring at their idiocy for the entire day. I would also like to videotape them while stifling giggles for my money

        • Helena (Kismet Shamanatrix, CEO of PriestessSensei Inc.) says:

          That sounds like a better business plan than whatever it is they are offering.

  5. Because, for fucks sake. says:

    I don’t usually body snark, but… I never realized Choad was so short.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Nice torso-less hood, though, Choad. Fresh!(tm)

    • Donkey's Calcified Pineal Gland says:

      Not only short, but look at him. What a freaking tool.

    • melting marionette says:

      julie look like she’s tripping balls in that shot. And why can’t she stand properly?

      • Never ever breaking up or getting a job says:

        Because she’s bowlegged from the knees. If she stuck with OMG BALLET it would look better.

        • Tingolayo says:

          Also, she must pop her left shoulder, suck in her stomach, stick out her butt while leaning forward, bend her left knee like she has to go to the bathroom, and tilt her head to the right.

          Don’t ask me why she does all these things, but it’s her posing formula.

          There are occasional variations, such as bending *both* knees as if sitting down while standing up, doing the skirt pull, and of course the widestance. But the basic formula is consistent.

    • Morrocanwear with Antlers says:

      He just looks short next to the height of her camel toe.

  6. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    Donkey’s insane thigh gap fauxto-chopping is insane.
    Also, nice condom head, doofus.

  7. Eff You $$$ says:

    I just watched The Post (great movie). How the fuck is “intentional porn” Michael Ellsberg (poor, broken Muse Magdalene) the offspring of this man?

    • Eff You $$$ says:

      Sorry, and by “this man” I mean Daniel Ellsberg of The Pentagon Papers.

      • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

        The Greasy Gargoyle will be getting gigs for the next five years because of this movie, and I guarantee the only reason The Washington Post published his recent #metoo bandwagon horseshit is because of Daddy.

    • Truckstop trollope says:

      CIA top secret revenge Project Mesh Gargoyle Predator 2

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      The children of his first marriage are very distinguished in their professions, and, by all accounts, kind and generous people.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        I remember you telling me about them and went down that rabbit hole soon after. There’s a vast difference between the first and second family.

        • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

          🙂

          Patricia Marx Ellsberg has not impressed me to date.

          • Eff You $$$ says:

            Isn’t she polyamorous and presumably funds La Phlemme?

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

            You’re not impressed that she attended a lesbian orgy with her former daughter-in-law that was facilitated by Christina Morassi, who made sleazy insinuations about the fauxtos she couldn’t post on Facebook?

            patty

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

            In case you missed the post, that orgy was Jena’s bachelorette party, celebrating her impending nuptials to Deadbeat Dad. It’s all very Victorian porn, isn’t it?

            pattycakes

          • Helena (Kismet Shamanatrix, CEO of PriestessSensei Inc.) says:

            Yes. It’s like a picture from Alan Moore’s “Lost Girls.” Lady Alice Fairchild with one of the nameless chicks.

          • Living a chaotic life is not the same thing as being free. I feel bad for all the families involved and particularly for the children.

          • Stalker is the new trickle-down rage says:

            DAMN AFGHANI U LOOKIN HOT BOI

            and your kid continues to be cute

          • Failed Mercedes C Class Leasee says:

            #hotcaulk

  8. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

    OT: Did Fozzie’s parents finally stage an intervention? He was “visiting” California for weeks.

    • Tingolayo says:

      Is there an “employment” chapter in this story???

      • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

        Doubtful. Best-selling author Fozzie likes to quit traditional gigs and then laugh it off. Like most of the woos, he wants a free lunch or as close to it as one can get, whether it be having a sugar mamma (hi, ali!) or doing the “life coach” shtick. Like Ali and a lot of these clowns, he’s also obsessed with bitcoin and other “currencies.”

  9. Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

    Hey, Rhoda! La la la LA la, la la la LA.

  10. Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    Kinda O/T but did any of you see story on ABC about NXIVM. The guy that started it was a failed marketing fraud turned cult leader. A lot of similarities to the woo.
    http://abcnews.go.com/US/nxivm-member-invited-secret-sorority-branded/story?id=51617201

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      I am completely gripped by this whole story. Celebrities’ daughters, branding, Seagram heiresses, so much.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        I can’t look away either. Even Scientology doesn’t brand people, right? (Or at least to the best of my knowledge). It’s very interesting from a research standpoint to see Keith Raniere’s illegal behavior ratchet up. It will continue to do so until he’s forced accountable. He didn’t go to jail for fraud the first time, just paid fines. His recent trip out of the country tells me he won’t be so lucky this time. Thankfully.

      • Julia Allison's Epileptic Daunce says:

        I am fascinated too. A singer I am minorly obsessed with went to Necker with some Bronfmans and now I wonder what he is up to. He’s a scion of a musical family so maybe he was getting groomed.

    • Nosferatu-tu says:

      That is insane. Apparently he touts his IQ as being 250. Did I hear that correctly? Apart from all of the other BS, shouldn’t that be a major red flag? Standard test results don’t go that high, even for a perfect score.

      Sounds like a bastard cult of $cientology. I don’t understand how people can get sucked in by these things (well, i understand it but I don’t understand it) but I do feel sorry for them and the damage it causes them. Thanks for the interesting link, Winchester.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Yeah, he’s a fraud through and through. I can’t find anything that proved the IQ thing and I hate the media repeats it as *fact*. Even saying “he’s says he has* gives him more credibility with the vulnerable. Or to your point, it wasn’t challenged. I didn’t know tests didn’t go that high. I thought genius was around 150 (?) The same was said of him in Vanity Fair and Forbes. Self-proclaimed does not make it so.
        I love the part where the reporter danced around how he was unattractive and couldn’t see the appeal. That one left a mark on his insecure ego.

        • Stalker is the new trickle-down rage says:

          let me jump on in here as a statistician. IQ scores are placed on a standardized normal curve. That’s why the “average” IQ is 100. An IQ of 250 is basically statistically impossible (I don’t have time to actually calculate the chances because I have to do actual statistical work today) but it’s a shitton (technical term) of standard deviations up the line. 3 standard deviations from the mean covers 99.9 percent of cases (hence the quality process “Six Sigma”, which is 3 up and 3 down catching most mistakes). He’s talking about being like 6 or more (no time) sd from the mean and that’s just fucking ridiculous.

          tl;dr: claiming an IQ of 250 is mathematical bullshit

      • whereismarshmallow says:

        If anyone is looking for more info on the craziness of cults there are two excellent podcasts…the Casefile episodes on jonestown and Glynn Washington(<3)'s Heaven's Gate. After watching the donkey show spiral down into wooville I can't help but see the similarities.

  11. Helena (Kismet Shamanatrix, CEO of PriestessSensei Inc.) says:

    Thank you for the post, Gilly and Rhoda!

    The shorts in the first picture are 15 sizes too small. How unusual.

  12. Random Snowflake™ says:

    So funny these people would re-enact the Jim Jones party in Guyana.. since they would ALL (every last one of them, the slow witted morons) have drunk the Kool-Aid. It’s funny though, haha. Good times.

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

      If Bear or Manboy Allis or Papa Chevalier or Dave Moron or any masculine with money told these asshats to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge, they wouldn’t even hesitate.

      idiots

    • Stalker is the new trickle-down rage says:

      wait, I thought Gilly was joking, are they LITERALLY reenacting Jonestown? Because that’s some tacky shit. Huh.

  13. Brother Love says:

    “Certified” by whom?

  14. Happy Hanukkah to all the Jewish cat people.

    Hard to believe this fall will be 10 years for me following donkey. I remember coming home from work in ~2010 and stocking up on trashy food and gluing myself to the monitor (smart phones not ubiquitous yet) to read the breakdown of each #epicfail of that era. I remember JFAing JFA and posting “first” a million times, etc. Time flies. Donkey will be 40 before we know it.

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      Chag sameach! It has been a long time. And yet Donkey seems to have learned nothing.

      Happy everything to you and your wife and your adorable child!

    • Grammarian Emeritus says:

      first!1!1!1!1!1! was totally 2010

  15. kitty says:

    OT (sorry) I’m trying to get in contact with the site mods, but not sure if the contact form is best? Can someone get back to me at my linked email address? Thank you!

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry says:

      There’s no linked email address here. If you need to contact the mods, please use the contact form.

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