“Wild Weasels” Eve – The Masculine Protector Spots Are Sold Out!

The world as we know it will change tomorrow evening, when “Wild Weasels” lets loose in a DTLA loft. Jaahass, non-lesbian Myka, Ariel White & her yoni, and Donkey will be among the goddesses honoring the feminine and castrating realigning the masculine.

The woo grifters are invested in gender determinism to such a perverse extreme that they make Victorian England seem socially progressive. At Wild Weasels, 30 masculines will be in attendance as “protectors” of the 120 feminines. The ratio of men to women is similar to that of an old school discotheque … or a modern sex club.

Meet head “protector” and 1970s roadie Destin Gerek. Is that a coobie atop his head?

“Who doesn’t want more turned on women in the world?” Indeed, Destin, indeed. Though I’m a little worried about what might turn you on:

Bottom Picture!

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46 Responses to “Wild Weasels” Eve – The Masculine Protector Spots Are Sold Out!

  1. Truckstop trollope says:

    Coobie on his head-lol.

    That guy, with all the #metoo stories etc etc etc, is profoundly discordant with the cosmic vibes of the collective moment of greater awareness of harassment, assault, rape etc and people cheer him on. He and Ali shld get together per Jean

  2. Telexfree Antofagasta says:

    Oh look it’s nose #2, my personal fave

    DTLA? Is the Modesto Strangler cumming?

  3. Deadbeat dad's enormous, abnormally giant head says:

    Ew. Just ew to all of this.

    It’s all SO gross and abnormal. The men are obviously going because they’re dirtbags. The women just sound like complete idiots.

    Ew.

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow says:

      The men are going for a cheap thrill and most of the women “facilitators” appear to be pushing their grifts. Bait and switch.

  4. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    activated stance

    LOL, wut?

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      Who the fuck would say “Make my spine scream for your activated stance” during BDSM sex? Paging Grifty Shades of Bray!

  5. Hroswitha says:

    I wasted some of my time by going to that Destin tool’s ‘Evolved Masculine’ website, mainly to see if I could get an explanation (or an apology) for that chest tattoo. He’s basically just a woo-y pick-up artist, right?

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow says:

      Yep. We’ve written about him before, and I’m sure he’ll be pushing his Evolved Masculine course – only $1499.99 if you pay before 5 pm – to the male suckers that Jaahass manages to rope into Wild Weasels.

      • Hroswitha says:

        I must have missed the previous commentary, which is a shame because he seems like something really special. Having read the pitch for his Erotic Superpowers course, the thought of him protectively holding anyone’s vessel makes me more than a little queasy.

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        He looks exactly like that weirdo hobbit-like erotic goddess, Jennifer Russell. And their messages are akin. Are they twins? Littermates?

        • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow says:

          Now, now, Jen’s littermate is Bryan “Nimitae” Franklin, who gets wasted at woo confabs, takes off his shirt, and rubs his gut up against young goddesses-in-training, sort of like the Harvey Weinstein of Camp Septic.

    • Morrocanwear with a caftan full of coobie. says:

      She’s driving around in a sexy get up, trying to find his house right now. Watch out chocolate aisle at the Palo Alto Whole Foods, a storm is a-brewing.

    • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      “Elon Musk is looking for a new girlfriend, after actress Amber Heard broke up with him in August.” Heard went to the school of Donkey after getting dumped/spin press release.

      • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow says:

        Heard is a gold digger on the level of Louise Linton. If Musk was stupid enough to get involved with her, he deserves a donkey.

        • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

          I will say in Ms. Heard’s defense that she turned in an excellent and altogether non-self-flattering performance in “The Informers”, which was far better a movie than it had any right to be.

          Other than that, yeah, I don’t get it.

        • Winchester House of Faxutoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

          The media just needs to say Linton +1 are more presidential than the trumps and he’d fire Mnuchin immediately.

    • Aggressively Stupid says:

      Wasn’t Donks super chummy with Musk’s first wife for a while?

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        Yeah, for long enough to get the lay of the land at her 1st burn.
        https://s17.postimg.org/6uphzj4qn/unchopped_bike.png

      • darling dearest is over this shit says:

        isnt that what sucked her into the woo culture and BM? she was still on the gotta get a founder kick, justine said founders go to BM and the end.

        • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow says:

          Yes, that was my understanding. The ridiculous Ms. Musk was one of the self-absorbed fucktards who sucked Donkey into the woo Haightberry. Another Virgil was that loon who provides healing modalities by applying a cottonball to one’s face. I’m not making this up, but I’m blanking on the asshat’s name.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            Another random bit of trivia, if memory serves:
            When a scroungey Donkey who scrounges was scrounging around for a last minute ticket, she felched one off of MMBH’s pocket gay, Adrien Feld. Pretty sure that’s right. I wonder if Donk even paid him? Didn’t her name show up the following year on a list as still owing ye ol’ raunch for camp fees?

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow says:

            Paging Creepy Divorced Bob!

          • Stalker just turned into Kamala Harris for 37.5 seconds says:

            Adrien Feld actually wrote a book and I read it! #success

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            @Stalker — it’s been a minute, but I used to read his Field Notes (if that’s even the right name) back in the day when GOMI lampooned him w/ some regularity — seems like it was fairly decent writing.

          • Stalker just turned into Kamala Harris for 37.5 seconds says:

            I’m a sucker for Gossip Girl type stuff and it was like that. Amusing.

  6. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    Donkey’s hand with pointing finger in Bottom Picture does not even look like a human appendage. Or even a donkey appendage.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      P.S.: Thanks to Brayella for tracking down that pic of Donkey in Better Days. Always fun to contrast with current pix of her in Bitter Days.

  7. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow says:

    OT: La Fraud must be getting ready to launch her erotic enchantress grift. Seriously.

  8. Truckstop trollope says:

    love Dennis hoppers early satirical work

  9. Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

    Donk and the weasels went into the belly of the beast last night. Did they make it out alive? If so, will we even recognize them?

  10. Breakfast Burro-ito w/ Captain Gary says:

    Howdy, basement dwellers! Delurking to report a very boring Baugher family sighting…

    Huscat (old-timey commenter Captain Gary), kitten and I went to meet some friends for brunch in our Northern Chicago neighborhood and were sat beside a very nice looking couple with their two well-behaved children. Although the tables are about six inches apart at this place, I didn’t pay them much attention until an older couple sat next to them.
    I realized the older gentleman was Dadsers and started to observe more closely…I got the impression that he and Robin were making friendly conversation with the family next to us because they had cute kids and the seating proximity was so intimate…the way they were speaking was very nice, but…formal.
    My heart was racing as I whispered to Capt. Gary, “Peter Baugher- two tables down.”

    Well, as I’m sure the cunning catladies have figured out- the nice couple between us and Petey/Robin turned out to be Britt, Allie and their kids. As the meal progressed, they all relaxed a bit, but I was kind of freaked out that my initial impression was that this family were strangers seated next to each other.
    Allie (who is really beautiful) was rocking her sleeping baby and seemed hella bored while Britt engaged his toddler and parents, who seemed super happy to be with their son/grandchildren. I wish I could have eavesdropped and given you some juicy intel, but Huscat was between us and we were catching up with friends from out of town.
    However, I can report on FASHUN! Midwestern preppy was in full-effect and Dadser’s sweater was a terrible teal and gray pattern of overlapping rectangles. Both he and Britt were doing the basic midwestern uniform of crewneck sweater over collared shirt. Yawn. Robin looks like she has aged and looks a lot like Donk. She was wearing some forgettable combination of red, cream and black with some gold jewelry. Allie was wearing so much boredom.
    Overall impression- Momsers/Dadsers just seemed really, really nice and kind of oblivious. Their presence lined up with how they created an unchecked monster and just go along with whatever her current bullshit is.
    On a personal note, I never totally bought that Donk was totally supported by her parents (probably because mine would never and I just can’t imagine being in your late thirties and still being supported by your parents) and figured she was a ruthless enough schemer to get by on grift. BUT after experiencing firsthand the doormat vibes of Petey, I will never doubt her source of income ever again.

    Hey, catladies – huscat and erstwhile catdude Captain Gary here. Thought I’d jump in with my own two cents here. Being that I was closer, I actually interacted with Britt, Allie and Dadsers (who smiled at our little guy in a very nice Midwestern way). Had some knowing dad banter with Britt – something like “Least fun game ever” as our kitten was dropping his books for Dad to fetch – and the like. Overall, Britt seems nice, if pretty quiet, and Allie seems the same. I’ll concur with the wife that the Baughers don’t seem engage much with her and vice versa; however, other than that, they all seem way too normal to have spawned such a hellbeast. I think it’s like everyone surmises, though – Donks sucked up all the oxygen in that family, Momsers and Dadsers let it go and quietly cleaned up the swath of destruction left by Donknado, leaving quiet Britt to excel in a thoroughly quiet and normal way. Dimestore observational psychologist OUT.

  11. Walk? Not bloody likely says:

    La Phlegm’s fingertips are caked in something (unless it’s my old dodgy phone screen). That self pleasure is going to result in a lovely case of bacterial vaginosis. And you just know these woos won’t take real medication until they practically rot. Even smelly Sascha won’t go near her.

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