Updated: Woos Ignore Nuclear War On The Horizon, Look Forward To Frying At Burning Man

We may not make it to the end of summer before Cheetolini launches World War III and we’re all nuked by North Korea, but Wooville is completely silent on events in the real world. Not a gregdamn peep from any of them. Presumably they’re worried about alienating potential marks, so it’s business as usual. Links to scam after scam, especially from Skankatron, ME ME ME, and, of course, OMG! Burning Man.

Jennifer Russell is posting away about how amazing Camp Septic will be this year. More Drugs! More Orgies! More Dress Up! She’s also been urging her fellow cons to contribute their hard scammed dollars to Android Jones’s “mind blowing” installation. That includes you, Donkey!

Mind blowing! You’re making Ken Kesey and every black art poster artiste proud, Android.

What’s this? Skankatron is sitting out Burning Man? Are her multi-million-dollar bidnesses not doing well? The orgies just won’t be the same without this walking STD.

Aw, she misses the trampier, more solipsistic Ali/Alexis/Whatever. Ain’t responsibility a bitch, O Olde Raunch?

Oh no! Ali’s former collegiate piece, best-selling author Michael Austin Jacobs, AKA Fozzie, might also miss out on Burning Man:

Fozzie just posted: “No matter what treatment I’ve tried, these hives don’t stop – along with other symptoms.” This sounds serious. Who knew living off one’s parents could cause such stress? Can anyone help?!

Bottom Picture! Rain & Rainbow and Jennifer & Tubs gleefully await incineration:

Update: PhuturePhuckPhace has been composing his computer off for Android Jones’s “mind blowing” installations. Please donate to Indiegogo today, so Rain & Donkey can get PAID and continue to rent a room in a suburban Novato shithole.

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38 Responses to Updated: Woos Ignore Nuclear War On The Horizon, Look Forward To Frying At Burning Man

  1. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    Tubs! Heehee!

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      Courtesy of hives-stricken Fozzie. When he went off on Bryan Franklin during his woo tirade, Fozzie wailed on “tubby” Franklin doing drugs at dirtfests, taking off his shirt, and rubbing up against horrified goddesses.

  2. Razzmatazz says:

    “A world war … was announced …”

  3. darling dearest is over this shit says:

    Is pancakes still in Guam?

  4. BunnyBingo says:

    Donks – the Prom Queen of Burning Man.

  5. Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

    I am sure Skankatronia can honor Burning Man by doing a ton of drugs, having sex with any man, woman or piece of furniture within a mile radius, and listening to loud dance music.

    Just like she did last week.

    Or the week before that.

    Or… you get the idea.

    • Tingolayo says:

      or not bathing for a week

      • Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

        Bathing?

        What is that?

        • Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

          Never forget: “People at the airport held their noses when I walked by.”

          Whatever you do, Ali, be sure to post on Facebook that you stink to high heaven. P-U!

          • Tingolayo says:

            I’ve heard the catladies refer to this, but missed Ali’s original post. Re-cap, please? Was she horrified to discover she had BO, or horrified that other human being with noses had a problem with her sacred divine goddess stench?

          • Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

            She and Craig Filek were walking through an airport and folks made visible reactions to the couple’s stench, which Skankatron proceeded to share on FB. She seemed more annoyed with their reactions than worried about smelling like B.O. and dried semen.

          • Greg says:

            Can you imagine how freaking smelly she must have to be?

  6. Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    That shite site inc. had an article that about how telling the truth isn’t the same a spilling your guts as it relates to business. (hellllllo Shit-Show-Shanti)

  7. Morrocanwear...I love you dance video! says:

    Will the white platform patent leather boots be going to burning man, or will they also be getting their booties ready for high school?

  8. Stalker is the New Praise JEAN BRODIE! says:

    Ali, why the hell is your freshman-in-high-school son in Thailand by himself? jw

    • Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

      I’m betting he’s with his creepy biological father, AKA Estelle Parsons, in Thailand, the sex capital of the world. Estelle, who used to drive the kids to school while drunk, went away to Thailand a couple years back and didn’t return to Boulder for months.

  9. Greg says:

    Has anyone seen this? Remind you of anyone?

    https://sfbay.craigslist.org/sfc/ofc/6256376954.html

    • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

      Ha!

      I am too lazy to live my life, do it for me.

    • Energy Pussy (brought to you by BIG TAMPON) says:

      Why I just happen to be a woodworker, chef, swimmer, skiier, manicurist, who loves dog diarrhea and wants to work for two high maintenance imbeciles for $15/hr- what luck!

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      I don’t know why, but Able to swim well in the ocean cracked me up/enraged me most.

      • Stalker is the New Praise JEAN BRODIE! says:

        I liked the idea that you’d only need 1 hour per day to clean and 3 hours per day to deal with their social media.

    • Tingolayo says:

      Those 2 cheapskates are extremely Julia-like. The need to hire, and pay the going rate to, the following: a dog-walking service; a mobile dog grooming service; a laundry service; a grocery delivery service; a housecleaning service; a meal delivery service; and a fiduciary service. Then they need to hire a personal assistant for the remaining tasks.

      Dear Greg, people are helpless.

      • Tingolayo says:

        On second thought, the ad must be a joke. On third thought, there are enough clueless tech dopes in the Bay Area who feel entitled to protection from canine and human attacks, yet refuse to pay medical insurance for the bodyguard they employ at $15/hr, that it could be for real.

        • Energy Pussy (brought to you by BIG TAMPON) says:

          Yeah, my first thought was FAKE, too, but I after re-reading, I bet it’s not. People are terrible. They’re probably preggers, too.

          • Tingolayo says:

            You know what’s a great, low-energy, low-maintenance breed for busy people who live in apartments and don’t have time for dog walking or grooming? A labradoodle!

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