Updated: Meet The Flame Of Unity & Get Ready To Vom In The Shower

Jean Gray & Swiss Mister are now billing themselves as The Flame of Unity, a “performance troupe.” You’ve got stiff competition, Marina Abramovic!

The Flame of Unity is the spark that reminds you of your naturally, divine, creative, expanding self. With music, dance, ritual, and more, we ignite you.

Bottom Picture!

Update: What’ll it be, DJ Deadbeat Dad? The lady or the caca? Who is The One?

A taste of Christmas, heh? I guess we know what the kids back in Switzerland will find under the tree this year.

Speaking of holidaze, it’s Jean Gray’s birthday tomorrow. Any suggestions for the nine year old?

Not one to let a potential grift slip away, Fivehead, a self-proclaimed erotic empress, would love to celebrate her birthday with you! For only $125 – 50% off the usual $250 – phone chat or skype one-on-one with the goddess, discuss “pleasurable weight loss, body confidence, and/or sexual empowerment” for an entire 60 minutes. Don’t delay, or someone may not be able to pay her rent!

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102 Responses to Updated: Meet The Flame Of Unity & Get Ready To Vom In The Shower

  1. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    Is he missing a toe, or do reindeer have cloven hooves?

  2. Stalker is the New Praise JEAN BRODIE! says:

    Video, why you no play for me? Video is unavailable just like Papa Chevalier’s wallet.

    • Stalker is the New Praise JEAN BRODIE! says:

      Oh wait i scrolled back up and there it was. Kismet! I am transformed into a quivering bowl of not giving a fuck.

      • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

        If they’re using this vid to market their performance art skills – and it’s the only one on their new FB page – welcome to hardcore poverty.

      • Helena (Kismet Shamanatrix, CEO of PriestessSensei Inc.) says:

        I got rung just in time to order heaps of nachos.

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        Finally was able to watch the Phlegm of Uselessness video. Is that a random household ladder covered with a (no doubt also random household and soiled and sour) bed-sheet, illuminated with (no doubt dollar-store purchased artificial-vanilla-scented) candles behind Swiss Mister?

  3. Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

    We ignite you???


  4. Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    We first banged on weeds high as fuck. So romantic.

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

      Why do the woos insist on posting faxutos of themselves right after they’ve screwed? Ali & Fozzie did so at least twice, with comments along the lines of what a senthual goddeth Ali is.

      Mythic, Jena? You and Deadbeat Dad didn’t invent fucking.

    • Never the Bride says:

      My husband and I have been married for over 30 years. Sometimes we do it. May I show you?

      I mean, sheesh, WHY do these people think we care about their sex lives?

      • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

        And what does banging in a field have to do with their performance art skills? Do you think Karen Finley would add this to her resume?

        • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

          Ticks and Dicks…their next show.

        • Single Unity says:

          The field is a non-traditional venue that changes paradigms and spins the fidgets of uptight corporate drones.

      • JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

        It reminds me of a girl in high school who would not shut up about how she would sneak into her boyfriend’s house and fuck him before school. Her excuse was that she was 16 and getting it on the regular for the first time, I have no idea what the woos excuse is.

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

          Sounds very familiar. Did her boyfriend’s parents put out a restraining order on her?

      • Single Unity says:

        What else do they have?

    • Swisss phlegm green unite card caca spirit says:

      this. period. she trying , desperately, to get preggers. from he, with 2-4 abandonded children in another country already-SAD!

    • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

      I hope they got ticks.

  5. Morrocanwear Loves You Rain says:

    Holy smoke, I need feather medicine, stat. Bad headache and only feathers can cure.

    • Tingolayo says:

      You’re in luck! I happen to hold a degree in Feather Medicine from Michael Austin Jacobs University at His Parents’ Basement. I am certified in Turkey Feather Magic and have also taken a 14-minute seminar in Healing Foods from Derpin Smegler. My phone consultations start at $1,499.99 for the first ten minutes.

  6. Maze says:

    Hang the DJ, pl0x. Burn down the disco while you’re at it.

  7. BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot. says:

    Did they line the inside of the YMCA’s old kiddie pool with sheets? In the video, it sounds like there might be a “Senior Water Aerobics” class going on on the north end of the pool.

  8. BunnyBingo says:

    Post-coital selfie, lovely.
    The Flame of Unity is just a live-sex show right?

  9. Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

    You misspelled The Phlegm of Unity, I think.

  10. Darling dearest communicates with grace says:

    sound healing, holy smoke and feather medicine.

    hey its 5 weeks to Burning Man isnt it? is judy going this year?

    • Morrocanwear...I love you dance video! says:

      Of course she is, she has gone since before anyone else. Being the private person she is, she will absolutely not call attention to herself.

  11. Curling Irons at Dawn says:

    He owns only one shirt, right? And it’s a vest.

  12. Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

    OT: Ryan Swain is apparently back in New York and now calling himself Peacock Bailey Swain. He’s tagging idiots like Ali Shanti and David Madow – remember that dentist with the STAY YOUNG FOREVER grift? – but they’re ignoring and/or deleting him. I believe Swain is around his kids, which is worrisome.

    The latest three posts:


    • Tingolayo says:

      I fear that Swainy Todd has been completely lost to mental illness at this point. His poor kids, having a parent who goofs around on Facebook all day with dumb vanity posts.

      That said, I will probably use “bitech” in the near future. It will mean what I want it to mean, Inswain.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

        Inswain in the membrane. Yeah, yeah, too easy and this will not end well.

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

          JFAing myself to add that they apparently took the kids away again.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

            He never takes responsibility for his shitty behavior and then makes another video blaming everyone else:

          • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

            When I watch Swainy’s videos, I keep thinking “OK, so now is where he is going to start making sense. This was just a buildup and now will come the statement that will tie all this together” but it never happens.

            I know. I should know better by now.

          • Tingolayo says:

            Wolf, it’s like waiting for Donk to actually say something that actually has to do with business/startups/entrepreneurship/branding/social media in her seriouth bidneth lady videos.

          • Curling Irons at Dawn says:

            That’s prolly for the best that they swiped the children. Hopefully, they will not be in the vicinity when he implodes the final time. He’s just terrifying.

          • Woo voyeur says:

            Didn’t he invite homeless kids into his home and force one of them to say “I love you” or he was gonna kick him out? That was terrifying for me to watch. He is going to lose his mind when the real world comes crashing down on him. He should take a long trip to Europe and spend time alone.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

            During that time in which the unwashed and somewhat slightly dazed folks were living with Swain, he filmed a bizarro wrestling match between himself and Fozzie. I guess they were fighting over Ali’s honor? BWA HA HA!

          • Woo voyeur says:

            Also, of course they are taking your kids away. You’re driving while taking a video of yourself on your phone. It’s not only pathetic and narcissistic, it’s dangerous.

      • Morrocanwear...I love you dance video! says:

        At least he isn’t calling himself Rainbow like all of the other losers.

        Call me potato chip sanitary napkin please.

        Auto correct corrected rainbow, however I misspelled it, to “racist noble”.

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

          One of my favorite woo dirtcases is now calling herself Emerald Peaceful GreenForest. A former Visionary Creatrix, Multidimensional Mentor, Torch of Transformation, Emerald used to be named Amethyst Wyldfyre, because of course.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      This swainwreck is neck & neck w/ the sweat potato turd on twitter.


  13. Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

    OT: Poor Skankatron! Once again she’s upset that somebody doesn’t like her. Did Fozzie play ring & run on the Shanti household before running away to fill-in-the-blank? Did one of her MLM minions sue her grifter ass?

    Ali Shanti
    22 hrs ·

    One of my biggest challenges in business (and maybe in life too) is remembering that my people are my people and the people who aren’t my people, aren’t! And that’s okay.
    I have invested way too much energy in trying to convince people who aren’t my people that they should be, instead of recognizing that there are plenty of my people out there and giving them all of my everything.

    Anyone else?

    Joey Rhude
    🤔What’s the difference between people who are your people and people who aren’t your people?

    Ali Shanti
    The people who love me, appreciate me, see me and are into me, are my people. The people who judge me harshly and without compassion, talk shit about me, constantly disagree with me in ways that do not illuminate, disbelieve me, or hold me in a negative light/frame, are not my people. And not to say that people who are my people won’t disagree with me, I am sure they do at various points. But, it’s about how they be with that disagreement. Make sense?

    So we’re not your peeps, Skankatron?

    • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones, & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      I am proudly not one of ‘her people’. What she means to say is that anyone holds her accountable for unethical and or illegal behavior are not ‘her people.’

    • Morrocanwear...I love you dance video! says:

      She is like one of those dummies on Facebook who vague-post about people who have wronged them in ways that they think make them look like better people.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Passive-aggressive blame shifting is her spirit animal.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

        She’s pulled that stunt dozens of times, usually not naming some younger man who was banging her or women who worked for her and got fed up with the bullshit. “Oh Ali, how could they do that to YOU?!”

  14. DJ Telexfree Making Beeps and Boops at Dirt Festivals says:

    From the May 25th New York Review of Books, in an article about Robert Bresson, there’s a pic with the caption: “Bresson and the donkey that starred in Au Hazard Balthazar, 1966” and I was like, did a cat lady put that there?

    For the record, there was no fingering in the pic thank God

    • Tingolayo says:

      Do not watch that movie. Just don’t. It’s beautiful, but there will be tears for days.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

        Yes, it’s wonderful, my second favorite Bresson. Number one is MOUCHETTE, which will also leave you in tears.

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        I cannot watch any movies with animal protagonists, even with happy endings. And I’m not even a vegetarian.

  15. Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

    Didn’t Jena and Antler Boy meet and start getting hot and heavy at Burning Man? If so, why would their “first made love” experience be in a grassy field rather than a desert? I don’t know why, but this has been bothering me.

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

      Let it go, little rat, let it go. The woos never tell the truth.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      I totally wondered the same thing, then surmised that their BM meeting could have been a Soul Connection only later consummated physically in a random tick patch (title records indicating ownership by ex-MIL Patricia, no doubt.)

    • dr. cupcake cray cray says:

      Their BM fuck was likely part of a Molly-fueled orgy. The field of weeds was probably the first time they were just a twosome. And I know I’m a sap, and do not want to white knight for la flim flamme, but I do think there is a difference between fucking and “making love.”

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        Yeah, your version definitely makes more sense.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

        I couldn’t agree more. I tend to think “making love” is an intimate, private – dare I say spiritual? – act between two people, or, in Ali Shanti’s case, five people. “Fucking,” on the other hand, is what porn stars do, or raging naricissists who feel the need to post pictures of themselves postcoitus for all the world to see.

      • Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

        Oh gross. You’re probably right.

  16. Money Map Tiny Crowd says:

    Between this dude and Ellsberg, Jean Gray has managed to snag two of the fugliest guys in New York. #somethingisvommingup

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      They are equally unlovely, but at least Smellsberg (presumably) does not have cloven hooves. Speaking of hooves, what’s going on with dumb dim (amateur) dancer Donkey, and when Jacy going to spill?

    • Morrocanwear...I love you dance video! says:

      I am no super-model, and attraction is based on more than looks, but Ellsberg is just a step too far for me. Based entirely on his appearance (including hygiene issues that seem apparent even in photos) he would be a hard no. His personality, interests and career in no way mitigate that no.

      Like Ellsberg, the current husband just looks unclean. Also, both of them have startlingly unattractive faces. Throw in a couple of deserted children and you have the complete package of never for me.

      • Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

        Did you just say “hard”?

        May I show you?

      • Donkey's Calcified Pineal Gland says:

        As much as Jean Gray pretends to think she is an enlightened goddess, it is pretty clear that she is as deep-down insecure about her looks as Donkey. I think both of them still envision themselves as the awkward unpopular teenagers they were.

        • Money Map Tiny Crowd says:

          Jean Gray hates herself. Please see — her entire persona is built around how wonderful she looks. Hey Jean, because I know you read here. Get a job. Do you what that wakes up??

      • highly curated box of porno mags and vhs tapes says:

        is a hard no the same thing as a clear no?

    • Afghani DADSTER Friend says:

      Maybe this is why antlers/smellsberg are both so eager-to-please and willing to do group sex, be publicly cuckolded, etc. Without being some kind of “sex expert” or “intimacy coach”, they aren’t going to be getting much sex at all. Even more true if drugs/alcohol were not in the equation.

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        Wish you would stop w your cucks references; makes you seem very MRA. Expect better from an educated and perceptive person.

        • The Real Afghani Dadster Friend says:

          I think you’re confusing me with someone else. I really don’t know anything about MRA. But I do think the correct term for getting pleasure/excitement from someone else sleeping with your partner is cuckoldry. How is it offensive to use the correct term?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            The cuckold is humiliated when his mate sleeps w/ another, not pleasured.

          • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

            There is something called a “cuckolding fetish” which I think is what AFF is referring to.

            But AFF, my dear, you called the Baughlers “cuckservatives” at least once here, so I think you used up your tolerance on all cuckold-related words.

            And polyamory is unlikely to be what people who have a cuckolding fetish do, anyway. Mesh Shirt was banging ladies while Flimme-Flamme was banging dudes and ladies. Not usually how the cuckolding fetish crowd rolls.

  17. Swisss phlegm green unite card caca spirit says:

    what a total loser, Patricia paying the bills, never mentions any Australian real family, and with one of the most slovenly idiotic faux-deep shallow child abandoners ever, and she is trying to procreate with it! Watch out Jena he may divorce you after and get a cut of the townhouse and alimony for child support… for him! if he has a brain cell keft…

    • Whatever says:

      This is so sick, she is so beyond pathetic. Tasteless, with those pictures shuttering with yuck, yick and voimiting, all kinds of ahh and yuck!

  18. Money Map Tiny Crowd says:

    Jean Gray married Michael Ellsberg, who did intentional porn. Gross and grosser.

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

      Yes, and she possesses not a smidgen of erotic innocence. Everything this woman does seems incredibly calculated.

  19. Grifty Shades of Bray says:

    This is relevant to our Donkey. Why narcissists and psychopaths want to remain friends with exes. I’m not sure I agree with all of this, but there are some good points here. https://broadly.vice.com/en_us/article/ezjy3m/narcissists-and-psychopaths-love-to-stay-friends-with-their-exes?utm_source=dmfb

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly, Real Housewife at Dirt Festivals says:

      No, I don’t think so. Other grown-up assholes wear onesies.

Comments are closed.