Flamin’ Donkey Dances For Us At Jess Johnson’s Latest Garden Of Eden Smellfest

“This is more than just a party, it is a mass movement to love Pachamama and unite our Southern California Tribe to raise the vibration of the planet. We will start the night with an opening ritual with Jess Johnson and special guest Elana Meta who will guide us on an intentional dance journey.”

As opposed to unintentional dance?

The latest FB profile picture:

“Honoring” Pachamama with “special guest” PhuturePhuckPhace. Where’s Waldo?

Bet her “different drummer” pose ain’t so cute these days, eh, Petey & Robin? SO PROUD to keep funding your layabout 36-year-old daughter?

Only the creme de la creme came to give thanks to Pachamama, including The Jazzerciser, Ali Shanti’s brief boy toy, the stoner who was going to film her stumbling about burner fests (if Mama gave Skankatron her retirement savings):

Donkey is intentionally in New Zealand with Ryan Allis and his piece. Surely the threesome is changing the course of history down under!

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144 Responses to Flamin’ Donkey Dances For Us At Jess Johnson’s Latest Garden Of Eden Smellfest

  1. Fell Off The Rainbow Raft says:

    She needs to quit with bright pink polyester tights.
    So now she’s a fire dancer lady? But did she still wear ballet tutus and shoes?

  2. Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

    I love (hate) the woos.

    It’s never “This sounds like fun! YAY!”, it’s “I love the intention of this gathering. I am honored to be invited”.

    Every party has to be justified as having a higher purpose.

    How pretentious and pathetic is that?

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      The inflated woospeak gives me chuckles. Everything they do involves epic choices, transformative energies, as if no one had ever attended a druggy music fest before. I wonder how they manage to do mundane chores, such as taking out the garbage or feeding the cats, or are these moments also filled with transcendent epiphanies?

      • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

        Everything is cutting edge, changing the world, like they’re the vanguard of some movement. Sit down. Super basic white people longing to be tho extheptional.

        And now they’re in NZ appropriating Maori culture. *eyeroll*

    • Aggressively Stupid says:

      #somethingschanging
      But when will something actually BE changed? Because this all seems pretty much the same.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        ^This. How many times can Ali Shanti reach the next level?

        • Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

          She’ll explain everything in detail to you.

          For $495.

          Cash only, please.

          • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

            495 would get you an overview. Detail would require at least 2 grand.

  3. Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

    Well, I suppose part of Petey’s visit to SF was so that Julesie could ask him for the money for a plane ticket to New Zealand.

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      “OK, Snookums, but first you must promise to stop making your kicky, unconventional life SO public. My colleagues down at the firm are talking, and your mother has stopped receiving invites to charity functions. Think of your dear old dad, the guy who pays for you to dance ’til you drop!”

  4. BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

    The money, the money for this lifestyle. Where for does it come? I’m telling you, Judy has us all fooled and is enjoying the last laugh.

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      petey

      I’m Peter Baugher and I approve, and pay for, my daughter’s layabout lifestyle!

      • Tingolayo is so tribal the Maori are like whoa says:

        Oh hai, Julie’s old nose!

      • BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

        It just boggles my mind that he pays for her…even after attending the orgy of the uglies. I thought for sure that was the line in the sand.

        I guess he feels badly his spawn is too unstable for anyone to ever take seriously, from employers to boyfriends. Just feed the guilt machine money to assuage the pain.

        • Aggressively Stupid says:

          It’s more likely that Donkey didn’t come from nothing and her parents don’t really care what she does as long as she doesn’t embarrass them too bad.

          • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

            It’s why they’ll never call her to the home stall.

          • Snow yells "Nachos!" says:

            But what is that “too bad” line? Didnt JA cross that line a long time ago?

          • Aggressively Stupid says:

            I would have thought so, but then, I was born with the ability to feel shame which is something the Baughers (Baby Brother Britt excepted, maybe) don’t seem to possess.

      • BunnyBingo says:

        Smug Sugar Daddy to the world’s oldest Shirley Temple impersonator.

  5. Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

    There isn’t a deep pocket that Donkey doesn’t want to suck up and attach herself to, remora-like. Allis is her latest stooge after Dave Morin and Bear Kitty didn’t work out. How long will it take for him to realize she’s freeloading?

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      I was watching an NBC news special on the murder of Versace last week. One of the talking heads spoke of Andrew Cunanan knowing how to flatter people, how to suck up to them, how this strategy worked … to a point. I immediately thought of Donkey kissing OMG! Randi’s ass and writing about the Morins as if the couple had discovered the cure to cancer. She’s clearly gone out of her way to flatter Ryan Allis and his yoga piece. I’m guessing he PAID for the trip to new Zealand.

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        What I’m thinking as well. I’ve known several user narcissists like Donkey in this regard. They spend their time sucking up to rich men and conning them into giving them high-paying contract jobs. Every interaction with them is transactional in nature.

        • Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

          Yep. That kind of con artistry can work if the sucking up is combined with a genuinely charismatic personality, which Julia can have in 1-on-1 situations (even though she’s insufferable on camera).

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          I think she’s probably “working” for Allis in some capacity and has convinced him that it’s in both their best interests that her HIVE carbon footprint remains stealth.

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            I know Allis was looking to buy land in CA last year for this idea of an “intentional” community of trustafarians, but I’m sure reality hit him in the face about regulations and other obstacles to this plan that he’d face in CA. I would not be surprised if they are looking at New Zealand as an option for this community and that’s why they are there.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Maybe she can work any New Zealand stay into a BOOK deal with St. Martin’s? Suggestions for a title? Donkey Down Under?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            Donkey Down Under: the Brāyori Chronicles

      • Curling Irons at Dawn says:

        I saw that, too. Recorded and watched it later. Fascinating! He had rich older men paying his way in the beginning. I’ve always wondered if donk does too or has her allowance subsidized. If so, this lifestyle is most accepting of it, since everything is about sex and getting paid, and the dj is the best SO for it, since he appears to get his sex from a variety of sources.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Shorter: parasite

  6. wonkeye says:

    I have never envied the Donkey before, but my huscat and I are going through an scarily lean time right now and seeing her on a father-financed trip to New Zealand has pushed that button. I’ve no doubt that things will look up for us soon, and we will be able to afford our own fabbo vacation without any help from our parents, but between this and those jackals toasting the demise of our healthcare safety net yesterday, I’m officially furious.

    • BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

      Julia would need a job just to afford health coverage. I’m scratching my head over this one.

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      I don’t know how she keeps pulling it off, but if it’s any consolation, she is a miserable person inside, and karma will eventually catch up with her in a big way.

      • Aggressively Stupid says:

        It’s pretty simple, you just have to be a completely shameless con artist.

        • Not! Random! says:

          … with no one to live for or worry about but your own sad self. Truly fulfilled people have some combination of SOs, friends, parents, siblings, and children with whom to experience the ups and downs of life. Julia has no one to share a meaningful life with and therefore is in constant search for The Next Shiny Thing. It’s a lonely existence and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      Same. This is the first trip of hers that I truly envy. Ah, well.

  7. Tingolayo is so tribal the Maori are like whoa says:

    Oh, so it’s NOT a loud, obnoxious bray issued from plastic chiclet teeth and a Botoxed mouth… it’s an indigenous Maori war cry!

    And she’s not a white dipshit tourist from the suburbs, she’s a tribal sister! Got it.

  8. Razzmatazz says:

    I call my grifter friend group “tribe”=I’m just like the Maori. I bet she even watched “Whale Rider” during a hangover Sunday during college 15 years ago, and thought about buying the DVD but didn’t actually do it.

  9. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    PhuturePhuckPhace’s shirtless hood never fails to crack me up. What a complete tool.

    • Tingolayo is so tribal the Maori are like whoa says:

      Right?! He’s such a bozo. Nobody wants to see your armpits, white boy.

      • Tingolayo is so tribal the Maori are like whoa says:

        JFA all those hoods in his collection are like $90 each. SO BOHEMIAN.

      • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat Whores says:

        He reeks of middle-aged desperation.

        • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

          He does look like a ridiculous man-boy. Look at his cap, turned to the side. Fresh!

    • Razzmatazz says:

      Almost tempted to start using Rain Baby’s Sleeveless Hoodie as my screen name. It’s like a Joey Lawrence shirt from 1991.

  10. LickedRandisCake says:

    I am creeped out by all the “tribes”. The talk of the vibration of the planet? They are like Scientologists without the celebrity clout.

    I’m holding space for my fear of them, but who will receive my tears?

  11. BunnyBingo says:

    Ryan Allis’ Life Lessons:
    http://www.businessinsider.com/ryan-allis-life-lessons-are-inane-2014-8

    I’m guessing one is “She’s Not A Third Wheel, She’s a 24/7 Three Way Partner!”

    • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

      Ugh, after reading this, I can see why he and Donkey get along so well. At least for now, they do.

  12. Ethel-egg says:

    I would literally shit myself with delight if I spotted a donkey in the wild.

    • I need Likes to validate my own feelings says:

      No you wouldn’t. She’s fucking embarrassing and awful in person. She’s so painfully desperate and hateful of anything that she can’t use for her agenda.

      • Ethel-egg says:

        That’s what would be so delightful! I’m in NZ so it would be a laugh and a half.

        • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

          Go look for her! Just follow the sound of braying.

          • melting marionette says:

            middle of the north island e-e?

            you should be able to hear her all the way from queenstown.

          • Ethel-egg says:

            Yep m-m. And I work over at a coastal holiday area during the week so have two prime spots where she might show up. Lols

  13. melting marionette says:

    More cultural appropriation. Makes me sick.

    As a New Zealander, her misunderstanding of Maori Culture is offensive. Maoritanga is sacred, and to be respected, no reduced to “exotic” statements that attempt to get you IG or FB likes. Visit Te Papa Tongarewa, or a marae, and learn about the culture, but don’t pretend you know about the Haka just because you’ve seen it on TV. It’s not a war cry, dance or a challenge – it’s a display of a tribe’s pride, strength and unity, and a sign of respect.

    See the following:
    – Wedding: https://youtu.be/QUbx-AcDgXo
    – Tribute to fallen Soldiers: https://youtu.be/xI6TRTBZUMM

    I hope the Ponaturi, or Taniwha come out of their hiding places and get her.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Wait, what, you say hot pink shiny petroleum-based athletic garb (encasing substantial haunches) has no place in sacred tradition?!

      • melting marionette says:

        the rock she is holding in her hand is bigger than her brain, but made out of the same material.

    • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

      Would we expect any different from her and her ilk? There isn’t a culture they haven’t inappropriately appropriated.

      • melting marionette says:

        honestly, what’s wrong with just posting “in a beautiful country, enjoying the scenery and hospitality of friendly people”?

        • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

          Not ego boosting enough for the woos.

          I am dying to go to New Zealand so I am just a quivering jelly that she is braying around your beautiful country.

          • melting marionette says:

            hugs albie – would love to show you around.

          • Curling Irons at Dawn says:

            I felt that, too. Never cared for any of her travels until this one. It seems so wasted on her.

    • I need Likes to validate my own feelings says:

      I’m sure she will “go to Asia” and “find zen in a kimono” in Taiwan. She’s so dumb it’s astounding.

    • Rife with breakups swang by says:

      Thank you for sharing more indignation (auto-correct from ‘information’ but it stays) about this. They are messing around with serious stuff. Ugh.

    • Curling Irons at Dawn says:

      That is stunning. Never seen anything like it. Thank you so much for sharing.

  14. Curling Irons at Dawn says:

    Meanwhile, the rest of us stopped attending raves and living subsidized lifestyles in college. And the only thing intentional about this is refusing to grow up, work for a living and wear clothes not sold at Spirit Halloween. Also, tribe isn’t a thing. It’s just a word used to excuse taking group drugs in your late 30’s.

  15. Meh or Feh says:

    OT but related.

    https://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/news/2017/05/05/usa-today-asks-fbi-probe-rise-fake-facebook-followers/101303300/

    “One batch of fake accounts featured posters who appeared to be in countries such as Bangladesh, India, Egypt and Pakistan, often with comments written in Bengali, Hindi, Urdu and Arabic. These appear to be manually created accounts, as opposed to accounts created by software, suggesting somewhere in the world humans are busy setting up these profiles.”

    Sounds like they’re all her fans in the ‘Stans.

  16. Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    OT: Please PAY to send Jess Johnson’s soul sisters to Message in a Bottle smellfest. The weakest link in the trio can get a ticket, but not the other heARTists?

    Set On Spirit. Beautiful familia. As many of you know my heART has been completely set on fire working with these magical, mystical mavens of musical medicine, Annie Anton and Krista Richards. This year I was invited to perform at Lightning in a Bottle 2017 presented by Do LaB, but only given one ticket and my heART KNOWS that these two women are supposed to be with me. We have been offered 2 timeslots. One on Saturday at 4pm to create a Transformational Free Your Voice Expression Circle, then on Sunday morning, Nate Hogen, aka Nature, has invited us to be his guest muses to bring in Sunday Morning Gospel to Meditation Mountain. LIB has no more performer/ presenter tickets and I am curious if anyone out there would be inspired to gift tickets to Annie and Krista so we can ROCK peoples heART chakras into a state of unity and harmonic bliss. Sunday we’ll be weaving in the masterful alchemy of Bear Kittay and I knoooooow we are all supposed to do this together! So. If you have a) connections to 2 free tix OR b) feel inspired to buy a ticket for one (or both) of these ladies we will create a custom chant JUST for you to help you wake up in the morning with your mind set on Spirit, love, devotion, your purpose, your health, abundance….anything you desire! Music IS the most direct channel for your prayers to be heard! Lets play! Lets harmonize. Let’s do this <3 SO MUCH LOVE! ~ Jess Magic

    Well, if Bear Kittay is appearing in concert too, of course I’ll dip into my savings to help these women change the world!

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      My heART wants to vOMIT.

    • Not! Random! says:

      Hmmm, why isn’t Bear Kittay supporting his “sisters” who are so graciously helping him weave his master alchemy? Wifey must be clamping down on the wallet. Smart lady.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        Maybe those sisters didn’t open up their homes to Bear & Kitty for the honeymoon that lasted three years? Never forget that wedding registry. Holy merde!

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          That was some industrial-strength grifting right there. Bear hauled his balls around in a wheelbarrow to pull that off.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            That wedding registry never fails to appall me. My favorite: “1 +/- hour of your time as a Body Worker.” Yeah, I can’t wait to give Sgt. Pepper a happy ending.

            bear

          • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

            That photo could be a recruitment poster for ISIS.

    • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

      What a resounding endorsement from the festival organizers.

    • Fieierce Mani says:

      No.

    • Aggressively Stupid says:

      By the way, I looked it up, tickets to this shitshow are $300 not counting camping fees (RV spaces are already booked!). So, Jess and her White Lady Gospel chorus are asking for 600 bucks and a camp spot or RV to crash in for the weekend. Because it would make her heart happy.

      • melting marionette says:

        relying on handouts to get what you want only increases your sense of automatic entitlement. even worse when you receive what you ask for.

        how’s that patreon going, jess?

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          Now down to $85/mo. Talk about a bust! Jaahass had initially asked for 8k/mo and Cory Tanner Glazier told the woos to give her 6k/mo because the caterwauler was changing the world. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

          https://www.patreon.com/JessMagic

          • Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

            Oh, dear. The white rapper in Jaaaaassss’ patreon page is the most cringe worthy thing I have seen in decades.

            https://youtu.be/GRGUxx-I2Pw

            For reals.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Oh THAT asshat! Jonathan Buck, not to be confused with Jon B., the singer/songwriter/producer whose birth name is also Jonathan Buck. Jaahass’s Buck appears to have abandoned the woos.

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            He has dead brothers under the floor? Has anyone called the cops?

        • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

          “…early adopter,” right out of Crossing the Chasm, every Silicon Valley CEO’s bible of manipulation.

  17. Whatever says:

    That video really sums up the emptiness, haggness, tackiness and overall lauageable display of cultural appropriation. White dots Jess the mess really you are not a woman of color no matter what you do and paint your face. She just bothers me the emptiness and plain stupidity but donkey is a runner up. Dumb bitches

  18. Rife with breakups swang by says:

    This is offensive. The way these women are Co-opting other cultures into a mish mash of profit driven, entitled, drivel is straight up theft and violence against the people they are “inspired by”. I can’t handle it. This article encompasses a lot of my feelings on the issue. http://www.decolonizingyoga.com/white-lady-sisterhood-needs-evolve/

    • Veruca Salt Lick says:

      Thanks for the article. I really enjoyed it, especially the comments.

    • Tingolayo says:

      The article is brilliant, and I would bet cash money (PAID) that the author knows at least one of the woos. Went down the rabbit hole of linked articles, incl. one on the con artist Tony Robbins… his events sound like a nightmare of crazy, loud people pretending to be “positive”– no wonder Donk thinks he’s so amazing. I also didn’t know that he was so sexually inappropriate, but it figures.

      • Rife with breakups swang by says:

        I ended up reading that one too! Scary and sad stuff, but glad someone insightful is describing it.

  19. Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

    Dave Morin recently posted an Instagram of Brit wearing that same Alice & Olivia rainbow popsicle dress that Julia wore and claimed it was a birthday gift. Is this another Jordan’s Tiara situation?

  20. Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    OT: Ali Shanti is back with the rainbow in recovery, or maybe she’s not, or god only knows and no one cares. SK3B also identified heavily with Marvel Comics’ GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY 2, because the tongue-in-cheek, superhero sci-fier examines many of the “issues” the old raunch is confronting. HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!

    “As Glennon Doyle Melton says, life is brutiful. And, yesterday was one of those days, for sure.

    The relationship Rainbow and I have been engaged in for the past 18 months or so is moving into a new stage. The old form has completed and we’re in process of discovering what right relationship looks like for us.

    Infinite gratitude to E Dan Smith Kiana Prema Connor Bray and Jacki Saorsail for creating a safe container for us to move through what was really challenging and see what neither of us could see alone.

    This is the power of community that can create and hold safe space.

    And that doesn’t mean it wasn’t hugely confronting. It was. And I’m seeing how my own addictive patterns and disowned parts kept me (and him) trapped and hiding in the relationship.

    More on that in the post linked in the comments. love emoticon”

    And the old raunch links to a blog post in which she blithers on and on and on about herself. Is this “one woman, two essences, three big grifts” website new?

    http://alialexis.com/disowned-parts-and-how-they-rule-our-lives/

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      JFAing myself to add that GUARDIANS post. How old is this woman? 19?

      “Guardians of the Galaxy, woah. Saw it tonight with my kids and their dad, on the heels of a completion/upleveling ceremony with an important relationship in my life, expertly held by community.

      For the first half of the movie, I wondered what the value was and then it all came around to tie together many of the themes I am personally working through.

      Just another reminder that love isn’t what I thought it was. love emoticon”

      I can’t begin to imagine the epiphanies SK3B experiences when she goes to see, say, THOR or LOGAN or CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER.

    • bitchface says:

      I thought Julia was Rainbow?

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      That’s the most long-winded “we broke up” I’ve ever read.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        Why say it in three words when you can blither on and on about your breakup and your needs for 30+ paragraphs?

        #pleasurablenarcissism
        #thewonderfulworldofme

        • BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot. says:

          Hasn’t she described herself as “trapped & hiding” in ALL her past relationships? She is living the same damned epiphany over & over again.

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            Yes, and codependence and controlling and repeat and repeat.

    • Tingolayo says:

      Her poor, poor daughter. Imagine you’re a teenager, and your mom keeps bringing home characters like this dude and DJ Jedi Toilet King.

      • Razzmatazz says:

        I hope she joins a sorority and becomes a pharma sales rep.

        • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

          Not going to happen, alas, because her demon mother is homeschooling her in the ways of the DJ and the model.

          Thin Bruce Vilanch, j’accuse! Grow a gonad for once in your life and get your daughter back into actual school.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            A former friend of mine went high-end woo and has done her utmost to drag her daughter down with her. That friend is now a “personal life coach.” She forced her kid to write a second book with her and the book, about a mother and a daughter who become even closer when touring several countries – EAT BRAY LOVE, anyone – went nowhere.

    • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      How can a middle-age, adult female refer to an adult male as “Rainbow” and not feel that both lives are clinging to the lowest rung on the ladder of life? Perhaps since he’s stopped drinking he’ll no longer use his woo chosen name.

  21. bitchface says:

    Just popping in to say Happy World Donkey Day to all y’all!

    https://www.facebook.com/DonkeyLand/

    • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

      When is Donkey History Month?

    • Tingolayo says:

      Awww, that baby donk is adorable AND she’s only sticking out her tongue because she’s a nursing barnyard animal, and not a 36-year-old unemployed mental case who dresses like a toddler.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      OMG, it says the baby donkey is a rainbow on a cloudy day. Coincidence? Or cat lady connection?

    • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

      <3 bitchface <3 I hope all is well for you!

  22. Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    SO PROUD! Surely Ali Shanti having attended – first in her class, had you heard? – and becoming such a thuckthethful online con artist played into Tiff’s decision.

    http://nypost.com/2017/05/08/tiffany-trump-is-going-to-georgetown-law/

  23. G$'s Paddleboat to Hell says:

    I know I am late to this post but [Redacted] and The Original Tiny n Cute just came across my worldview and she’s a dancer which I had forgotten. I realized that this weird incarnation of Donk is like, a crayola themed attempt to be TOTnC and I am just so blown away by this right now I had to come here and post it. I’m sure others have reached this conclusion already but this made it all fall into place with me. [Redacted] is “the wallet that got away” and look at what a quirky bride he took. Republican and pearls took her down a dead end to nowhere as did reality show McGingerArches, and so FINE she will SHOW US ALL how quirky and CUTE and a DANCER A DANCER I AM A DANCER GODDAMMIT I CAN BE HE SHOULD HAVE NEVERRRR LEFTTTTT MEEEEEEEEEE. I am just floored.

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