Updated, With The (Brief?) Return Of Mental Dental! Changing The World: Jess Johnson Reimagines Religion, Mocks Latinos

In need of a little heARTist medicine this Easter? Jaahass, Julia Allison’s BFF, and her sisters have the good stuff:

Writing for me is very similar to free-styling. When I write to a specific group of people, and I KNOW who each of them are, I can feel their hearts, and somehow, they help draw out the content that’s wanting to come through…as though they are writing it with me.

I just wrote to an amazing group of men regarding our upcoming #reimaginingchurch #GospelBrunch with Heart Medicine this Sunday, and fell in love with each man as I was writing, cause I just made a trust fall into his arms (without actually checking in with him first!!)

As I wrote I felt this beckoning of my heart to be real with WHY I even put myself out there in the first place. Events (as so many of you know) bring up many opportunities to overcome fears of rejection or feelings of not good enough…like a little child holding up her drawing and saying, “Do you like it?” (aka Do you like me?)

But when I write to specific people, I can’t just generalize into the yay-rah style of marketing…my invitations become a form of expression and connection in and of themselves and I find myself bearing my freaking soul! LOL!

Soooooo I wanted to share with you the message that just came through…for all the Brothers out in FB land who may not see…but to whom this message applies.

May you see. May you know.

Brother 🙏🏼🌎❤️

We are gathering a group of incredible humans this Sunday for an afternoon of #reimaginingchurch. So many of us felt turned off, betrayed or at the very least BORED as #%^* by the religious institutions we knew as children. Yet with this HUGE shift in humanity’s awakening, and the perils that many of us are feeling on the planet, it is essential to gather in unity and reverence…to feel connected to something bigger, to celebrate our role in it all, to make offerings of prayer and as my indigenous teacher would say “to feed the Holy”. 😍🙌🏼🌵

I’ve been guided to make this event an offering to the Divine Mother. To help rebalance all we have taken with our songs and prayers. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by grief (aka love) for the impact we’ve had on planet we call home. I wonder if we’re going to succeed in our missions to restore right relationship with Her. I wonder if we are humble enough to unify beyond our ideas of what’s “right” into what’s needed.

As I touched each name of the men whom we’ve invited to come, I had this overwhelming feeling of, “we’ve got this!” Thank you for that gift to my tender heART.

I hope you can come be a part of this day…this moment in time. Your presence matters…and we are asking the brothers to play a special role in creating the stage (metaphorically) for the feminine to dance and sing upon…and to do what She does best…turn us ON!!!

To life. To love. To healing. To harmony.

Your Sisters,
Jess Magic, Krista Richards and Annie Anton

PS…if you cannot come, please feel free to help by
1. Spreading the word
2. Making a donation to help fund our microdoc…so we can take this show on the road!
3. Giving a woman in your life a big hug and telling her how beautiful she is and how bright she shines!

I’m sure the brothers will be happy to turn you on, Jess.

The caterwauler also posted this video, which I showed to my 10 year old. “Why are they making fun of people who speak Spanish?”

Bottom Picture! America’s favorite Easter Kinderwhore (and Second Date Blowjob Queen):

Update: S.O.S.! Skankatron’s masculine side is ill. (Does she post this horseshit with a straight face?)

Don’t the old raunch’s butt buddies ever tire of the martyrdom? The gracious Swainy Todd even posted a message to Ali’s FB wall. Now with Fozzie and the male Rainbow gone, and everyone else running for the hills, maybe Herr Doktor will be doing some drilling in the busted-out van in Skankatron’s backyard?

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110 Responses to Updated, With The (Brief?) Return Of Mental Dental! Changing The World: Jess Johnson Reimagines Religion, Mocks Latinos

  1. Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

    Jesus would come out of the tomb, see this garbage, and go back inside for six more weeks of winter.

  2. grammarian of spring says:

    with the woo posts, i just skip straight to the comments.

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      Then you’ve missed some funny stuff, including often hilarious videos.

      How do contextualize the comments if you don’t bother to read the posts?

      • grammarian of spring says:

        too gross, too slimy. the good bits are repeated in the comments.

        • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          No, no, I didn’t take it personally, particularly coming from someone who’s never once posted a substantive response.

          • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

            That’s harsh.

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Yep, but I’d had a bad day and was thinking of throwing in the RBD towel because I’m simply too busy. I didn’t need to read a comment about someone never reading my posts. Also, longtime RBDers have complained to me about this commenter, so I really didn’t give a fuck.

          • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

            grammarian IS a longtime RBDer. Is there a clique that the rest of us aren’t part of? Some people are more RBD than others?

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Oh, please, and of course I’m friends with some commenters outside of RBD.

          • Fameless Shamewhore says:

            Please don’t give up, Gilly! You do an absolutely brilliant job. There is NOTHING like this community anywhere on the internet.

            I just met up with Helena in Prague and had the most fantastic time. And that great time was also due to you and the time you put into RBD. I for one am very very appreciative of your efforts. Thank you so much.

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            My apologies to grammarian and stalker. As a few folks on here know, I’m under quite a bit of stress right now. Still, that’s no need to take it out on folks who’ve just come here to have some fun. As for not wanting to read posts about the woos, who can blame anyone for not wanting to get down in the mud with these oversexed con artists? I wouldn’t want to be anywhere near them when out in the wild!

          • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

            They’re terrible but I enjoy rubbernecking the trainwreck.

            Thanks for all you do, Gilly and I hope things will be looking up for you soon.

    • grammarian of spring says:

      cannot bear to watch the videos

  3. Handbag Is Not A Toilet Baby says:

    “Roopa was rigid, the way free spirits often were, about the romance of naturopathy and well-being as morality. Photographing meals, food blogging, recreational fasting — all that time committed to sweeping the steps of her temple. There was this spin, this indulgent spin to Roopa’s charity: when she did relief in Chile, she returned with a copper-goddess tan; if she volunteered for a bake sale, it was because she enjoyed baking. Her diet was another slick win-win rationalization of glut. Good intentions notwithstanding, that was the lemon-meringue heart of her frankly dipshit worldview: that merely observing selective austerities — abstaining from work, from money — was activism, when really it was shallow passivism.”

    Private Citizens, Tony Tulathimutte

    • Handbag Is Not A Toilet Baby says:

      Later, a character gets funding for a new tech site, Facetimes her boyfriend and says, “That’s pocket lint for them, but us it’s serious F-you money.”

    • Tingolayo says:

      This person is one of us and is talking about Donk and her (white, suburban) tribe.

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      I was already dying to read this but now I am even more dead.

      • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        Oh I want to read this! But first must finish Andy Cohen’s SUPERFICIAL. Go ahead, make fun of me, but this garbage boasts a critic-proof title. REDEMPTION: Following up AC with Laura Kipnis’s UNWANTED ADVANCES.

      • Handbag Is Not A Toilet Baby says:

        I stopped marking all the places it seems to have been written by an RBDer, because there were so many. It’s REALLY something.

    • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

      Thanks, Handbag, this sounds hilarious! I’ve just ordered the Audible because it sounds perfect for listening in the car or while cleaning the house.

  4. Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

    Jess sure is the weak link in that trio. Croaking is not singing. She has artificially lowered her voice and it sounds like shit.

  5. JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

    A whole bunch of white people singing gospel music is no one’s idea of a good time.

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      How do YOU spell cultural appropriation? I spell it W-O-O.

    • Fuckyo Nonburn says:

      Are they even singing gospel, though? Or is it just a bunch of self-created, repetitive woo nonsense-lyrics set to some semblance of a melody that they’re calling “gospel”?

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        That can’t be gospel because I love gospel, but I
        neither loved nor even like that back fence wail.

      • Bye Felicia says:

        Gospel that was terrible, “my indigenous ” teacher, bye Felicia dumb ass bitch. d
        Seriously she is just stupid arrogant hideous and tacky.
        The end.

  6. Whatever says:

    The video is unavailable? I would love to see it.

  7. Whatever says:

    Just saw this how disgusting, mocking Latinos people with accents all three a bunch of elitist. The singing is horrendous lack of rhythm, tone and overall soul. All three are soulless, tacky and ugly on the inside. Seriously just disgusting plain and simple.

    • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

      “My name… José Jiménez.”

    • Razzmatazz says:

      Some claims of cultural appropriation puzzle me, and I’m not automatically offended by humor that references race or even mocks stereotypes and prejudices . That said, stuff that the Woos do is offensive … that video has nothing to it other than “Latinos have funny accents.”

      • Ugh so disgusted says:

        Yeah and the other part of this that is terrible is that most Latinos in the U.S., such as Mexicans, are born in the U.S. Way to mock a diverse population that the Pres denigrates and wants to spend 25billion+ to “protect us” from. So tone deaf and wrong.

        (I don’t comment often but this REALLY pisses me off.)

        • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          It really rubbed me the wrong way, too. I understand some of the most trenchant humor toys with cultural stereotypes, but there was absolutely NO reason for those accents.

  8. Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

    Easter Whore is the gift that keeps on giving. I can’t look at that photo without bursting into fits of laughter.

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      It is the quintessence of Donk. Can you imagine being in church and seeing that come down the aisle?

  9. Wolf and Hemmingway in horse country says:

    What does the caterwauler mean when she says “this HUGE shift in humanity’s awakening”?

    Isn’t the shift the awakening?

    Or was humanity awakening in a certain away and now, thanks to the shift, it is awakening in a different way?

    To be honest, I don’t give a shift.

  10. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    OT: Jena la Flamme JUST posted another rental ad on FB. Now you can move in May 1 or June 1, “as you like.”

    ~ Seeking a single or couple to live with me in NYC ~

    Friends of FB with a network in NYC. I’d **LOVE** you to share this post on the behalf of Sacha Nielsen & I as we are looking to spread the word to find our ideal roommate.

    We are seeking a single or a couple. Someone aware and wonderful to live with.
    We live in a 4-story townhouse in magical, mystical West Harlem. I’m not exaggerating. Come see the architecture around here snd you will understand. It’s 19th century gorgeousness with international, multicultural charm.

    We have half the top floor available for sublet: 2 adjoining rooms (office/lounge & bedroom. Furnished or unfurnished, as you like. Private kitchen. Bathroom with a clawfoot tub. Backyard. And so much more.

    Available May 1, May 15 or June 1 as you like. Please comment & PM me for details. We’re calling in our perfect match that will be deeply nourished by our open-hearted home.


    • Because, for fucks sake. says:

      She’s been trying to rent this for months, right? It makes me think anyone who walks in, runs screaming out.

      • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

        They’re asking $1600/mo, which is most reasonable. Did Sacha greet potential renters wearing only those antlers?

        • Because, for fucks sake. says:

          $1600 seems reasonable and gives me faith in the world knowing NO ONE wants to live with them!

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            Top floor walkup in a Harlem shared space with woo nutjobs…doesn’t say separate entrance, who has to walk through whose apt. to get home? Is your stuff secure from all the trash they bring home for drug parties and all the open flam candles and sage bullshit? Sounds like a NY version of Ghost Ship in the making.

        • Frequent Liar Miles says:

          Probably mandatory caca-o ceremony participation and 3-ways with Antlerface and Jean Gray are conditions of the lease. Ain’t nobody gonna sign THAT.

      • Darling dearest communicates with grace says:

        “calling in our perfect match” sounds to me like she keeps rejecting people because they aremt perfect. too many non woos applying?

        • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          You’d think they’d want someone who’s actually able to pay the rent and not running a short con that never pays off.

      • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

        I think it is the smell that sends people running for the hills.

        The woos’ nostrils are desensitized by years of snorting drugs and smoking Greg-knows-what and they don’t like to shower regularly, the stench must be unbearable!

        • melting marionette says:

          “Eh, you were lucky to have a room! We used to have to live in t’ corridor!”
          “Oh, we used to dream of livin’ in a corridor! Would ha’ been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woke up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House? Huh”

  11. Tingolayo says:

    I want my screen name to be Eggs Nope they stinks

  12. Lulularouse says:

    I have a feeling that dead animal on Sasha’s head doesn’t help their cause.

  13. melting marionette says:

    the matted eyelashes never cease to amaze me.

    • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

      The matted eyelashes adorning the overcooked fried egg eyes. She looks like she’s been run over by a long haul lorry.

  14. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    Sure hope La Fraud came into a good pay day re: that horrific injury to her shoulder in last year’s fender bender.


    Pleasurable Living Practice:

    Drum circle in the park

    Central Park has incredible African musicians. Wow! So on point with their rhythms.

    I went through the full rainbow of emotions while dancing. Smiles, laughter, tears. I am alive, that’s for sure.

    Sacha Nielsen’s mother was born in Africa and oh does he have the moves in his bones.


    • Razzmatazz says:

      He’s a regular P.W. Botha on the dance floor.

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      Do these smelly ugly fucktards ever do anything that doesn’t have them crying and laughing?

      “Today I ate a boiled egg. I experienced every human emotion possible just by peeling it.”

      How are they ever going to get through a childbirth or a funeral or something that actually, you know, inspires most people to have emotions?

      A parking ticket would have them melted down to puddles of patchouli-scented goo.

    • Morrocanwear Loves You Rain says:

      What the heck is he wearing on his lower half? So strange looking. It was hard to see anything except his very good looking face, of course.

      • Veruca Salt Lick says:

        It doesn’t look like he’s wearing shoes, which grosses me out almost as some of the woo Burning Man orgy material.

    • Whatever says:

      Wtf? Ridiculous honestly

  15. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    For the love of Greg, Shantitown, PUH-LEEZE! invest in fauxto-choppe lessons.
    ::jacked-face emoticon::

  16. MYwoogasm says:

    Bye Bitch! O’Reilly fired. Chaffetz won’t seek re-election.

    Savoring these tiny moments of not terrified!

    • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

      high five high five. My hopes rest solely with the GCHQ at this point…

    • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      I love that O’Reilly was sucker-punched, he thought this would blow over.

      • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

        it was losing ad revenue that did it. Fox was paying out settlements for years but he was bringing in more money than the payout so it was worth it to them. Once the ad revenue went, out he goes.


        • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

          Well, the advertisers pulled out after the N Y Times article.


        • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

          I also heard that the other 21st Century Fox entities were having fits. Like, that bullshit wouldn’t last an hour in our division, we have a zero tolerance policy and we demand that Fox News take action. So…progress?

          But also capitalism and self-preservation :-/

        • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

          Yep that’s why boycotting the advertisers is always more effective than boycotting the networks or companies like the NFL. Hit ’em where it hurts withe their own negative truth which damages their image which is tied to profits.

          It fills my bitter jaded heart with joy. I do think these women should go after this golden parachute to truly force accountability.

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        CNN is reporting they are paying him “tens of millions” at exit.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          $25 mil was the figure I saw, maybe from Brian Stelter?

          Honestly, if I had $25 million I would pay it for him to go away and live the life of a hermit with no access to telephone or Internet or indeed any form of communication with anyone who isn’t related to him or providing him with essential goods or services.

          • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

            This is the sick part both he and Billy Bush get huge paydays for being sexist pigs or harassers. More than their actual victims recovered.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      Last night on Fecebook, a “friend” linked to a Mike Huckabee article (which I did not read; blech!) & then commented that she wished Dolt 45 would hire O’Reilly as his Press Sec’y. Numerous women, tongues lolling, echoed the sentiment — it was sickening & disheartening — what the ever-loving fuck is wrong w/ people?!?

      I’d just re-followed her, too, so that lasted a hot minute. CWAA. FFS.

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        Huckabee is so desperate for attention. It is beyond embarrassing.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        And why would Trump even weigh in on the Oreilly fuck up? I’d like to say he has more important things to worry about but it’s likely he doesn’t.

  17. Curling Irons at Dawn says:

    “Sing into this arugala.”

    “I see some of you commenting.” We’ve seen this before. The comments are coming from inside the post. Next thing you know, she’ll be taking requests from a “reader”.

    Jass Magical-thinking is, officially, the most irritating woo. The love child of a veritable SNL caricature and freshman sociology student, who purposely acts inappropriate in public in order to provoke a reaction, call it a “study” and write a paper on herself, her favorite subject. She is the one woo I would like to happen upon in the wild just to tell her to shut it. She is not as interesting, talented or charming as she finds herself.

    • Curling Irons at Dawn says:

      Also, yo hair in danger, gurl. That dead birdwing of a combover is likely to get caught in a boxfan within a 10 foot radius.

      • Curling Irons at Dawn says:

        Agreed on scary Shantitown being the scariest scarecrow woo. This Christina M. I do not have the horror of knowing. If Gilly hasn’t written about a woo of wooville in an article, they don’t exist in my world. I trust only Ms. Gills to profile a woo. If I try discovering a woo in the wild, I’m fairly certain I may lose my mind, go blind or turn to stone. A reblog filter is the closest I’m willing to get to these hippies without a full body condum. God’s work Gilly is doing.

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      I think my Most Irritating Woo has to be masturbation lady Christina M.

      Scariest Woo is always Shantitown.

      • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        Christina Morassi is revolting. Sexing up the office because that’s women’s “natural” inclination? I pray to god that she doesn’t have any daughters.

        Speaking of, Jena’s latest post is a shill for Morassi’s Pleasure CEO hustle:

        Did you know that your pleasure can lead you into a wild love affair with your business?

        These days being busy-overbooked-tired-hustle-push-through is how it’s done.

        And breaking that pattern to choose pleasure can be a heroic act!

        My teacher in this process is Christina Morassi, founder of the PleasureCEO movement. If you also want this for yourself, please consider joining for her ground-breaking 3-day retreat coming up called PleasureCEO Live!

        What if you could discover how unleashing more of your Feminine Pleasure was THE answer to having everything you want, especially getting off the hamster wheel of exhaustion and overwhelm in your business?

        This will be a time to create a wild love affair with your business, fill up on pleasure, and embrace more of your feminine power.

        PleasureCEO Live is a very special 3-day event for industry leaders ready to revolutionize business in the name of feminine power.

        It’s happening May 1 – 3 in Berkeley, and you can see all the details here: http://www.PleasureCEOLive.com

        Together, let’s create the new feminine-powered operating system for our businesses as a Sisterhood.

        After all… Women know that a wild love affair with your business is the greatest ROI.

        You can see all the details here: http://www.PleasureCEOLive.com


        • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          JFAing myself to bitch about Morassi’s con site. She cites stats about how unhappy women are and the secret to happiness is more pleasure, so sex up the workplace:

          You are a magical mystical being
          called WOMAN.

          Please stop trying to do
          business like men.

          You are not built the same way…

          And it’s hurting you.


          • wonkeye says:

            I can’t imagine the collection of sad imbeciles who would actually attend any of these retreats. Jesus. You couldn’t pay me to go, let alone expect that I would pay for the privilege. Just buy a stupid self-help book and give the rest of your money to poor kids or homeless animals or something.

          • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            I just discovered Morassi is a former “healer.” She’s been shafting suckers for a long time.

          • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:


            Trust me, woo who never worked a real job in her life, I’m not being hurt by meeting deadlines and building my team.

      • Curling Irons at Dawn says:

        That was meant to be an Albie response not a JFA.

  18. Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

    Mental Dental lost the hideous nose ring.

    Has he been possessed by the demons of sanity??

    What is this world coming to??

  19. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    OT & ewww!

    TV here is on 24/7, no joke, even if I’m paying no attn whatsoever, as is currently the case. Looked up just in time to see “Arthur Kade” on the screen chyron as the camera panned right to left, & then it took me a moment to place the name. #shadesofdonkey

    Suck it, Donkey –at least HE’s employable! https://www.facebook.com/Celebritypagetv/videos/1217751398291592/

  20. melting marionette says:
    • KC Baker's Appalling Baby Dance. says:

      Jesus, I read that yesterday and it was a puke-worthy read.

    • Stalker is the New integrity-full mood face says:

      why? I thought it was appropriately snarky.

      • Wolf and Hemmingway in horse country says:

        So did I.

        They make fun of the excess of pictures of vans in coastal locations in California and how cramped the space is.

      • melting marionette says:

        maybe my snark-o-meter needs new batteries.

        • melting marionette says:

          pushed “send” accidentally.

          the woo-speak irritates me: “…durable water bottles that help shift the bottled/privatization of water paradigm.”

      • Fameless Shamewhore says:

        I agree with Stalker: I didn’t read it as an endorsement of the lifestyle at all, I read it as total snark.

        The final image is someone coming up to the couple and praising them for keeping it real, but the previous paragraphs were all about showing us how staged and artificial it is.

        I thought the writer was taking them down. I enjoyed it a lot.

  21. Not! Random! says:

    “It looks like they’re having fun,” Huntington said, of King and Smith. “But they’re working a lot.”

    Creating a free-from-it-all image that they can then use to sell products to anti-consumption millennials? It’s brilliant and disgusting at the same time. But is it really “work”?

  22. Fuckyo Nonburn says:

    I feel bad for Wali.

  23. Lulularouse says:

    Can you imagine being the mother of Sasha’s kids and seeing these videos of him acting like a five-year-old while you are responsible for the children?

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      Meanwhile he hasn’t sent one Swiss franc home to those kids. I’m sure his former in-laws adore the manchild.

    • Fameless Shamewhore says:

      Yeah, I think about that a lot when I read about him, in particular when I see these kinds of posts with him dancing in the park, enjoying a jam session, just chilling at some party…

      For example, when he posts: “Central Park? Who is up for a tribal gathering under father Sun? Gathering at sheep meadow;)

  24. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    Who wants to bet that Donkey submitted this content herself?
    I honestly would not be surprised …

Comments are closed.