Catching Up With Dead Russian Hooker #2 & Her Yoni

Its yoni time 24/7 with the insatiable Ariel White! Turns out, even Brit Morin has a vagina:

“They’ll be peace in the world when there’s happy vaginas!”:

Ariel is a poet, too, and slick enough to pretend her doggerel is copyrighted:

Trouper Ariel is still posting on her little-trafficked Amant site, where we discover the inner beauty of woo goddesses by giving them makeovers. Seriously. Here’s a recent contribution from Isabella Konold, the emBODYment of irrelevance:

http://loveamant.com/being-real-rules/

Bottom Picture! Dear Penthouse Forum, I’m a sophomore at a small liberal arts college in California and was on a fraternity retreat when I stumbled upon these two ineffably randy women who seemed to be tripping their brains out …

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75 Responses to Catching Up With Dead Russian Hooker #2 & Her Yoni

  1. Grammarian of doom says:

    I wouldn’t piss these woos if they were on fire

  2. Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

    Jesus Louise-us, what a welter of unwarranted self-importance.

    Donkey looks okay in bottom picture, though. Someone got her to not put on too much makeup.

    Speaking of Donkeys, Chad’s touring all over the place the next couple of months. Will be interesting to see if she gets bored/lonely enough to break her social media exile (assuming they’re still even nominally a thing).

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      He’s headlining Jess Johnson’s Garden of Eden at the end of this month. Will Donkey be dancing for us? For Rain? For a new lov-ah?

  3. Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    Top image: subtle & modest

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      True elegance! Keeping it REAL!

      dance

      • BunnyBingo says:

        “I will express my angry sexuality through dance”

      • BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

        I alarm you with my fierce bra, then
        I distract you with my pulsating belly, then
        Bewilder you with my mystical arms, then
        Surprise you with my sidewinder crab leg, then
        KICK!

        • Stalker is the New Ringling Brothers Pigeon says:

          All while keeping on my face the expression

          ‘SUCKING RAZOR BLADES THROUGH A STRAW’

          Fear me!

    • melting marionette says:

      i thought she was trying out for the position of shortstop for the yankees.

  4. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    Bottom fauxto — are those supposed to be the asscheeks of one of these assclowns?

    Not buying it.

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      They’re Ariel’s cheeks. So free! So feminine! So multi orgasmic!

      • Highly curated box of porno mags and vhs tapes says:

        I think i disagree

        The ass cheek photo has a man on left and woman on right

        You can tell by who woman is by the strained mouth being too wide open, especially considering when not even facing camera

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

          b o t t o m f a u x t o

          • Highly curated box of porno mags and vhs tapes says:

            Sorry my bad, i did not even notice any cheeks in bottom pic at first

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            LOL, no apology necessary, ’cause THOSE ARE NOT REAL ASS CHEEKS, so you couldn’t know.

            Maybe the worst fauxtoshoppe Julia Allison has ever done, but I’m more inclined to think it’s a buried in the sand sitch happening there.

            I REPEAT: those are *not* real ass cheeks.

            #fakegnus

  5. LickedRandisCake says:

    Is it just me or does her ass crack seem….um….unusually wide? The result of having her head stuck up there for so long? Only her yoni knows, I guess.

    • KC Baker's Appalling Baby Dance. says:

      Her feet are certainly filthy. Not sure about ass cheek wideness because I am a prude!

  6. Whatever says:

    How low can Brit&company go? This is embarrassing and one of the many reasons why I do not go to the site, besides Brit is fake ,annoying and utterly useless.

  7. Highly curated box of porno mags and vhs tapes says:

    Dont mean to go full grammarian here, but technically the opening line of a ph forum letter is supposed to begin with an obligatory ‘i never thought i would ever be writing one of these’ statement

  8. Lily's Third Eye says:

    Isn’t this our girl JA?
    http://loveamant.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/160424_04_042.jpg

    I’d advise some sunscreen….

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      Doubtful. I’m seeing a widow’s peak. Not smug enough, either.

      Just heard Taryn Southern’s name dropped on the MY FAVORITE MURDER podcast — apparently, the BTK Killer had set his sight / site / cites on her? Not sure, maybe I had already heard that here. Oddly funny podcast, if anyone’s in the mood for true crime rehash by a stand-up comedienne & a food show host.

    • Andy Whorehol says:

      Nope. Nose not puddyish enough, fingers aren’t sausagey enough.

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      No, definitely not. I think it might be Amber Hartnell, a loony “sensual pyromaniac” who banged Smellsberg and is now banging Ali Shanti’s butt buddy The Jazzerciser.

      • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

        JFAing myself to note Hartnell, a complete nutcase, seemed to go off the deep end sometime this year but has been creeping about Jaahass’s Garden of Eden shitshows. I sometimes wonder how many of these folks have been or will be institutionalized.

    • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

      I think it might be Katty and Bear Kitty.

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        OMG, is this recent? I wonder if they are part of the same annoying “expat” Californios-take-Sayulita-by-Storm idiots I am marginally acquainted with. Santa Barbara Magazine was all over it a few years ago, but I thought the hype must have died down by now so it reclaimed its mellow factor. Apparently not so, if it’s welcoming Bozos in Sergeant Pepper jackets to its shores.

        • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

          I can’t remember when I saw it but it was a little while back. I think Ali Shanty has mentioned Sayulita, too.

          I wonder if Donk’s Drowning Ophelia photo shoot was in response to this. #notoneoriginalthoughtinherhead

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Julia killing (literally killing) a song
        http://www.pictaram.com/media/1461080291228882741_2186879020

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          No audio or video available to me (and that is probably a good thing), but it is so clear Donkey has not abandoned her tried and true formula of forcing people close to her to dress up a certain way and dictating them to follow a script of her making that is All About Her. See all family events (Craymas, Nephew run), Miss Advised Prom, Derpin in Europe and at Fashion Week, Burning Man self-wedding, Palace of the Fine Arts birthcray onesie singalong, among others as I’m sure I’ve missed some.

  9. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    OT: insurance scammer Jena la Flamme is still advertising for a roomie for April 15. They can’t find a single woo or sucker willing to move into Harlem’s most sensual paradise?

  10. Excellent Smells says:

    I am mildly acquainted with a close relative of the inventor of “my little pony.” which makes me wonder — what sayeth the attorneys in the rbd crew on the potential copyright violations of my little yoni? being a well-known brand and all.

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      I’m no attorney but be a mensch and immmediately inform this mild acquaintance and the family attorney (hopefully not Ali Shanti) that their pony has morfed into a vagina. I can’t imagine anyone will be pleased.

  11. Lulularouse says:

    Oh no. I inadvertently put this comment under the Miracle in Boulder post when it clearly belongs here:

    A friend of mine was invited to a Yoni Steaming Circle. I’m not kidding. The price included a Yoni steaming pot and the privilege of being part of this sacred sisterhood thingie. If you couldn’t make it to the event, for about $100 you could get a private session with the facilitator who would show you, one on one, how to steam clean your vagina. Unfortunately, she did not attend so I have no more to report.

    My guy wants to start a Weenie Roasting Circle for men. For $5.00 you get an Oscar Meyer hotdog and a bun.

    I guess that photo of Fozzie got me all out of sorts.

  12. Helena (Surprise Ironic Dracula) says:

    OT, @Fameless Shamewhore: I emailed you on Friday. Please let me know if the Passover trip is still on.

  13. Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    OT: Passover with the old raunch! “Courage” is spelled A-L-I-S-H-A-N-T-I.

    “I’m again reminded of my commitment to support myself (and all people) in healing the generational wounds that keep us repeating pattern after pattern, stuck in the game of blame represented by the victim, hero and perpetrator archetypes.

    I know that the way I can help best is to see where I am continuing to perpetuate these patterns in my own life and shift it here. And yet it’s so much easier to see it happening outside of myself, pointing the finger at other.

    But that only keeps the cycle going. Because there it is.

    Today’s prayer: I wish to take full responsibility for my own experience and hold each other in the highest light of truth, knowing that our individual experiences are exactly what we need in order to heal the traumas of being human. And everyone is truly doing the best they can, including me. heart emoticon”

    So, I guess she isn’t scamming to get her hands on her mother’s meager retirement savings this week?

    • Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

      She is still scamming her Mom.

      She is just not feeling guilty about it.

    • LickedRandisCake says:

      You can’t get blood from a turnip. I believe Ali already presenced her mom’s money into her own account. How else do you think she managed to put dildo’s and chocolate on the table every day this past year?

      If only she had a step mother to fleece.

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      Dayenu, dayenu.

  14. Lulularouse says:

    Just to clarify, for the price of admission you get your very own personal steam pot. I guess you then sit around in a circle for a group vag’ steam. There is something very pathological about the genital focus of these people.

  15. Because, for fucks sake. says:

    Why are all of these women obsessed with their vaginas? Were they all sexually abused? I’m not joking with that question.

    • Gilly Blake, CEO, Donkey Disparagement Industry Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      What with all the sexual acting out, I’ve wondered about abuse too. I know at least a couple of the women that Smellsberg has been involved with were abused, including the sad Muse Magdalene character.

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      See also Freud.

  16. ShesJustStupid says:

    God, these people will make a big deal out of ANYTHING. Yes, Noodles, organizing your email is earth shaking.

    “I’m in a massive process (feels massive, anyways) of coming back into integrity around the loose ends in my life.
    The two biggest places this is present right now are texts and emails.”

    • LickedRandisCake says:

      Yet more proof that none of these clowns know what the word integrity means.

      • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

        Speaking of, one of the guest speakers at Noodles’ recent retreat was Kc Baker. Sure, her shtick is similar to Moodley’s, but every time I feel like cutting Noodles some slack, Baker or some other woo grifter pops up on her page.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Doesn’t she have an infant to attend to? How could emails relating to her soi-dissant business even register?

    • BunnyBingo says:

      I guess I’m coming back into integrity around the housework in my life.
      The two biggest place this is present right now are dirty dishes and laundry.
      #pleasurablehousework

    • grammarian of spring says:

      bitch, please

  17. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    WISHFUL THINKING: that Donkey got busted for a fake service dog ruse. CWAA.

    A segment on CBS This Morning reminded me of her occasional crowd-sourcing of purchased fans in the ‘stans re: getting @princesslillydog “certified” — apparently, the state of California has the stiffest penalty for abusing the system — Donk’s Marin stall strictly said NO PETS, right, but an AirBNB review referenced @princesslillydog as an unexpected inhabitant, uhm, er, oops, so whichever lie Donk used, she skint herself in another realm.

    Did Dad$er think a lockdown of the pictorial evidence of Donk’s many braycations w/out her emotional support prop dog was really going to cover her raft ass? BTW, did we know about this — I only remember pics on the Nice Julia’s IG, but these are obviously by her — you can tell by how clean & happy Lilly was in the interim. https://www.instagram.com/princesslillydog/

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      If Lily hasn’t crossed, or at least approached the portal of, the Rainbow (!) Bridge at this point, I’ll eat my cat.

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