Rumor Has It: Donkey Wants To Bail On The Novato Tribe

TRIBE OR BUST! Soapbox Donkey posted daily about the benefits of communal living, how neo-tribal existence trumped any other possible living arrangement – there was no room for compromise.

But a little woo birdie – an impeccable source – told us Judy is hoping to move back to San Francisco and has even been checking out pricey one-bedrooms in the mission district. Moving to a toxic city? Say it isn’t so! With or without Rain?

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92 Responses to Rumor Has It: Donkey Wants To Bail On The Novato Tribe

  1. ShesJustStupid says:

    What’s a pricey one bedroom go for in SF? 4K and up? I’ll believe it when I see it. Shades of her looking at expensive apartments in NYC before she moved back to Chicago. She couldn’t even afford that last place she rented in SF without the help of roommates and air bnb.

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      She couldn’t even afford that last place she rented in SF without the help of roommates and air bnb and Dadsers.

      There, fixed that for you!

      Weren’t she and Debbie going to buy a four-bedroom house in SF? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

      • Fell off the rainbow raft says:

        I miss Debbie and book.

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          I miss Little Debbie, too. Re: book, how can one miss what never existed?

          debbie

        • Tingolayo says:

          I love Derpin. He was such a clown. Hours spent actually cooking in kitchen=5. Hours spent shopping for chef costume, recruiting stylist and photographer, staging photoshoot, building fake website=500.

      • Random Snowflake™ says:

        The 4 bedroom “home” she was thinking about getting in SF.. Money is no object (Thanks Dad$ers!). If only they could relocate the homeless poors from within her vicinity.

    • BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

      This will ruin her “I’ve lived in 42 places. Get me! I am something else.”

      Less gypsy more comfort-mover.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Nothing says I lack stability quite like I moved 42 times and don’t have job, husband or kids.

  2. JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

    One new persona coming up! What will she be this time? I think Big Little Lies Supermom to Be sounds about right.

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      reboot

      • JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

        There appears to be a vortex forming under her ass.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        “Consultant” I bet she’s working Grapes BF HARD for a position with the Thiel/Trump connection. She didn’t have health insurance but I could see her claiming to write policy for healthcare reform.

        • Effing Ineffably Un-Effable says:

          Given current hiring in the administration, I could see her actually being hired, no false claims.

  3. Veruca Salt Lick says:

    I just saw a woo-ish mural in downtown LA that said “you are a goddess living in a city of angels.” Complete with angel wings and young women from FIDM taking pictures in front of the wings. Eyeroll.

    • Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

      HA! Somebody I know tweeted a pic of it recently captioned with “millennial honey pot.”

  4. LickedRandisCake says:

    Is she rejecting tribe life or is tribe life rejecting her? Maybe they finally figured out that one house could not contain all that ego. Not even with the lauded outdoor deck.

    #decklife

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      BACK deck, ‘scuse you.

      P.S.: I really don’t see her moving back to San Francisco, and specifically not to the Mission. She will never fit in ever. Of course she never fits in anywhere ever, which accounts for her peripatetic (very-pathetic) existence.

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        I think Jahhhsss lives in the Mission. You know, her ‘best friend.’

        • Whatever says:

          Good lord really the Mission would not be surprising most tacky bigot, closed minded arrogant white people and their cultural appropriation live in the mission. That wouldn’t surprise me whatsoever with their lousy Spanish. Jess the mess is the actual worst both together make for the ultimate tacky self serving, self righteous ugly, lazy and smelly bitches.

    • melting marionette says:

      housemates have probably see through her persona and are quite possibly shunning her. it’s hard to be somewhere where you’re not wanted, even more so if it’s where you reside; bailing is her best option.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        Tiny&Cute indicated half of the woos do not like Donkey, while the other half hopes she can advance their “careers,” including Rain. I would think tensions in that Novato shithole run high.

  5. grammarian of happiness says:

    evicted from community lol lol lol

  6. I need Likes to validate my own feelings says:

    Lol her fake fake ass in the Mission, I can just see it now. Trying to be ethnic/burner hippy bitch and rail against techy scum (only because she can’t fuck over/enough of them into marriage) blah blah. I’d love to see her try to hang at a bar like a normal human being without being a total social retard, I’ve seen her in person and she’s the most embarrassing thing to happen to woman kind.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Isn’t the mission full of tech bros and Google employees now?

    • donkin donuts says:

      she’ll get ignored in the Mission, it’s mostly tech sort-of hipsters and she’s too old with too little success to be interesting or relevant… no one who will talk to her cares cares about her Wired cover or Gawker.

      plus aren’t there a lot of people she has (bad) history with in SF? she should just go back to Chicago but that would make sense.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        But Chicagoans were on to her and her BS even before that farce in the Tribune, and they will have no tolerance for the woo persona.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Uber will be getting a new CEO soon, she should apply for that job.

  7. Epictetus Joke says:

    Going off social media and moving out of woo-town actually sound like the best progress she’s made in decades. Sure it would be daddy funded, but at this point just dumping the DJ, stopping the drugs and festivals, and being a sincere person should be considered massive forward progress. Credit to her if she does it. Long is the way, and hard…

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      Interesting that all this seems to have happened right after Dadser visited her. I can see him giving her an ultimatum to go off social media and get actual work or the gravy train would be derailing.

      • Razzmatazz says:

        Must be nice to have your life funded for meeting such a low bar: don’t be embarrassing … actually, just be less embarrassing.

      • Random Snowflake™ says:

        Wishful thinking, but no.. he will fund her until she’s 50 if necessary. He hasn’t seen the light, and won’t.

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          Yep, Freudian Dadsers will be personally delivering her Victoria’s Secret order when he’s 85 years old and still see nothing abnormal about it.

    • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

      I’m guessing she shut down access so potential landlords wouldn’t see all the “I LURVE AIRBNB!!” posts, but that will be (as usual with her) pointless because diligent ones will quickly find out about her eviction. It would be hilarious if she persuaded Dadsers to boost her allowance because her bidness will grow faster if she’s in SF instead of out in the country hula-hooping and talking to the trees about Dwayne.

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        Whatever happened to her craving to be in NATURE? There’s no Palace of the Fine Arts nearby to show off for strangers, either.She will be as miserable as she was at Derpin’s LA Feces loft.

        • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

          Talking about trees and horses beat fessing up to why she had to leave SF. Prethentation and percepthion, once again.

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            I have to wonder if it’s not just her pulling a geographic again.

          • Tingolayo says:

            “Pulling a geographic” is the perfect phrase.

            I could never live in the Chicago suburbs; I’m moving to New York! No, it turns out New York is horrible and soulless; I’m moving to LA! I really love LA… wait, no I don’t, I’m moving to San Francisco! I love SF; I can really put down roots here! Wait… did I say I love SF? I hate it! It’s an evil city with no nature! I need nature! I’m moving to Novato! I have a back deck now! Um, err… it feels really weird to live out in the suburbs where everyone else is at work all day… I’m leaving Novato!

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            She’s never been to her.

          • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

            Why would you go to her? Smelly and desperate is not an attractive destination.

          • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

            Was attempting a joke based on this:

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SZgIk2b68gQ

        • Worrisome Pelts says:

          I’m not around nearly as much as I used to be. Did our RBD super sleuths find evidence that her landlord sued her? If she got evicted, getting her name on a lease will be a fun project for Dadsers.

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            Per Gilly last April: “The court docs are private, but public information indicates GAETANI REAL ESTATE INC filed suit against Donkey & Nehi on November 11, 2015…”

          • Worrisome Pelts says:

            Thanks! I don’t know anything about CA tenancy laws, but surely that will carry some kind of consequence when she needs a non-commune stall to park her raftass in.

            *imagine the Michael Jackson eating popcorn gif*

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            Wonder if the purpose of Dadsers visit was to somehow expunge this record, if he could. Maybe one of the actual lolyers here could weigh in.

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            From the Gaetani website: “Legal Services
            – Unfortunately situations sometimes arise where a tenant is in violation of their lease. If reasonable efforts cannot resolve the issue, we are experienced with the eviction process and have long-standing relationships with specialized attorney firms. We serve all necessary legal notices.”

            I remember when Donkey got the notice in November ’15 right before the Summit cruise. It seeemed as if she didn’t expect it. So she got the notice in Nov. ’15 and then finally moved out in March or April ’16. Was originally supposed to be out by January but somehow got an extension.

            I don’t think we ever determined if she was required to pay any kind of penalty or if she just had to get her raft ass out of there. When I evicted a tenant, he cost me legal fees plus did $3k worth of damage, and stiffed me for the last month’s rent. I didn’t sue him because it wouldn’t have been worth it. So maybe they were happy just to get the apartment back.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Surely the eviction will force her to get Dadsers to co-sign on any SF apartment, not that he hadn’t co-signed on her blah Marina unit. Something definitely went down when he was visiting little snookums, and toning down her internet presence is probably a stipulation re: the next handout.

          • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

            I wouldn’t be surprised if Donkey blames us for outing her illegal subletting. Any regular reader of RBD was aware that we discussed her illegal AirBnB’ing of that apt. But she regularly advertised it in a variety of places including on AirBnB itself, and it’s very likely her neighbors in that building weren’t too hip on having a revolving door of strangers staying there and complained. Social media is only one of her problems. The main problem is her dishonesty and feeling like she is entitled to special treatment and breaking laws as long as she can get away with it.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        I would imagine someone else has to co-sign her lease. What does she show as income? And airbnb didn’t help that situation.

      • Helena (The Same Amount of NOT) says:

        Can I just say, “Talking to Trees about Dwayne” and “Freudian Dadsers” are both ah-mazing screen names AND band names.

  8. Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

    I have two theories, which technically both could be true:

    1) When Dadsers was visiting, Donk probably lamented to him that she can’t land consulting clients while she’s living outside the city, and asked him to help her with the rent.

    2) Donk feels isolated and is TELLING people she plans to move back to SF in order to maintain some degree of relevance, whether or not that’s actually going to happen.

  9. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    Donkey looks like the very model of a brain-washed cult member in that top photo. Tho thipiritual.

  10. Delicious Bowl of Wali Rahman says:

    Ali Shanti is back with a new type of scam. This one is of the “pre-IPO” variety, so cash out your IRAs and help fund Ali’s next blowout trips to Vegas and BM.

    —-
    Every now and then, I come across investment opportunities in companies that I truly believe in. For the most part, the opportunities require an investment that is far too big for most of the people I know and so I don’t share them.
    Today, I got an email about something different.
    If you would love to invest as little as $10,000 in a woman owned, already proven and successful pre-IPO/pre-buyout “startup” (it’s really well beyond startup stage), please private message me for details.
    And, by the way, if you have money in an IRA, this could be a really good time to move that money into your self-directed IRA so you can invest in companies that you are connected to, and make this the first one.
    Message for details. <3

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      Yep, I saw this post and had a chuckle. This pre-IPO is “woman owned and already proven successful.” Surely we can trust the money goddess and her sistahs?

      She posted this humblebrag around the same time:

      “I am repeatedly reminded that clarity is the key to having.

      If you are not creating what you desire, consider where you are unclear about what you truly want and make clarity your priority.

      This afternoon, I worked with a young entrepreneur friend of mine to map out his business and personal finances, so he could identify exactly where to focus for the next 60 days.

      By doing this, he was able to see that where he had been planning to give attention was not going to generate the results he desired. And would likely dig him into a bigger hole.

      But, another area that he was going to give less focus (because it’s not quite as fun), will get him exactly where he wants to go.

      And, then he’ll have plenty of time and money to put into the more fun area in a couple of months.

      Easy course correct when you can see it from a place of clarity.”

      Hire Alexis Neely as your financial consultant today!

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Oh I like how she doesn’t mention what “round” this is, are there stock options, if so what type and what’s the split?
        Wonder how much gets funneled directly to Shit-Show’s own pockets?

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          You KNOW she’s getting a cut.

          It doesn’t get sleazier than Ali Shanti.

      • Tingolayo says:

        Entrepreneur=unemployed white suburban shaman who makes Jedi Jewelry out of stuff from the craft store

    • Money Repeller says:

      My guess is that this is a female-led startup that I know about that is having trouble raising additional money and has turned to new investors via crowd investment for a down round, but for some reason their closing keeps getting delayed. I don’t want to say the name of the business here.

      The service is actually decent and their CEO gives talks about how to raise money as a female led business, but they’re having trouble doing so themselves because I guess people have less patience for this kind of business model lately. The valuation for their last round was way too high and it’s kind of torpedoed their growth.

  11. Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

    Watching WGN and there’s a filmmaker on who’s talking about his new documentary, NEW TRIER: TIP OF THE SPEAR. He looks at a small conservative group with deep pockets, mostly in Wilmette, who attempted to sabotage a student-led high school event on racial inequality. I wonder if the Baughers contributed part of Judy’s stipend to torpedoing the day.

    • Tingolayo says:

      New Trier is evil! It destroyed the creative spirit of special snowflake Julia Baugher. She would be a happy, healthy person if not for the American suburban high school experience. New Trier crushed Julia Baugher’s spirit and prevented her from realizing her dream of becoming…. it kept her from a career as a successful… it interfered with her artistic vision of…

      Um, er, oops, never mind.

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      My first web blog was in 1996. Where are my acolytes?

      • Tsar Glob says:

        Which one!?

        There weren’t that many in 96, and most everyone who was blogging knew each other.

        (And we weren’t even calling them blogs then, it was a few years before Peter M. would later coin that term…)

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        I published a vintage pop culture webzine from 1996-2000, and part of it was a blog. And you are right, nobody called them that then.

      • Stalker is the New Ringling Brothers Pigeon says:

        acolyte reporting in!

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        Always your acolyte!

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        Meeeemeeeemeee, it’s all about meeee!

        /notreally

  12. Morrocanwear Loves You Rain says:

    OT: is anyone else watching Jungleland? it is a documentary series (not quite like Miss Advised) about an experimental community in Panama where idealistic young people go to learn about sustainable living. There are aspects of it that remind me of Julia’s “tribe”, and it is really fascinating so far.

  13. Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

    Why are you people so worried about where la Donka hangs her hat?

    She is a GEOAGNOSTIC tech guru, and it doesn’t matter where she lives.

    She can serve her many clients and fulfill her mission of spreading magic all over the world from any place in the world, as long as Dad’s credit card is accepted.

    Don’t you have any bills to pay?

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