Rain Drools & Drools & Drools Over Deliciouth Stacey Morgenstern

Donkey tags OMG! Rain again and again. He ignores her again and again. But PhutrePhuckPhace can never resist commenting on sexy, married (who cares in Wooville?) high-powered grifter Stacey Morgenstern’s social media posts. Hell, Rain even enabled her batshit insane “recovered memories” re: having been a “Hallelujah Breeder” goddess in a previous life, so of course he’d suck on this piece of hard candy:

Yummy! Though Stacey composed this doggerel for a married couple, Rain can almost taste her melting in his mouth.

Poor Donkey! How can she compete with this blond super goddess?!

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102 Responses to Rain Drools & Drools & Drools Over Deliciouth Stacey Morgenstern

  1. Stalker is the New Guacamole: The DJ Avocado Remixes says:

    That’s some Vogon-level poetry right there.

    • Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      I found it very Shantiesque, with a soupcon of la Fraud. Tho tasty!

      • Stalker is the New Guacamole: The DJ Avocado Remixes says:

        i’ve said this before but every woo action boils down to “i’m fuckable!” it’s sad. tragic, even. they don’t have brains or talent so can’t contribute in any other way.

        • Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          Their ability to sexualize everything and anything is something out of the theatre of the absurd. Are they all truly as horny as a 16-year-old boy?

          • Stalker is the New Guacamole: The DJ Avocado Remixes says:

            it’s like owning a ferrari and the only place you drive it is through the carwash

          • Because, for fucks sake. says:

            There has been one common thread amongst all of these woos and Julia: They’re all emotionally stunted and are functioning with the psyche of a 16 year old (at best).

          • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

            They latched on the the “sex sells” part of marketing without applying any other principles of marketing or understanding of how to run a business.

          • Tingolayo says:

            CARWASH

          • Stalker is the New Guacamole: The DJ Avocado Remixes says:

            bingo, tingo!

    • World O' Gluten says:

      That shit’s bypassed the Asgoths of Crea and is headed straight for Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings territory.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Candy/dandy/sex/sweet, OMG such a groundbreakingly original metaphor. Like our anscestrals weren’t incising depictions of berries/nipples in caves from the Pleistocene era.

  2. Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

    I feel like she posted something explicitly about having an open marriage at one point. Who has the time? Of course none of them have real jobs, so that must help.

  3. Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

    Oh, dear.

    Karma is a crazy woo goddess with big tits.

  4. Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    Here’s a more famous five-year old, in a better quality designer Gucci version of Julia’s rainbow Alice & Olivia dress.
    http://imgur.com/a/9RwE9

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      Yay, that is a sweet picture. I love Blue Ivy’s smile.

    • Grifty Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      After googling the original, I keep having ads show up for the hideous Donkey dress. Sometimes I hate social media.

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        Hahah me too! It’s like fashion PTSD. That fugly thing is haunting us all!

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          I have to remember to use Chrome incognito mode next time. And get an Adblock.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            Doesn’t it go away if you clear cookies &/or cache?

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            Probably! I didn’t want to erase some of that though. The Chrome browser works well on the iPad, I just keep using Safari out of habit.

    • Grammarian says:

      YASSSSSS QUEEEN BABY SLAY

    • KC Baker's Appalling Baby Dance. says:

      Age appropriate!

  5. Not! Random! says:

    ILRY writes like a man who doesn’t read much. Wasn’t that a dumpable offense in Julia’s world, not too long ago?

    • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

      He satisfies a whopping four qualifications on that 73-point checklist.

    • Afghani RAINBOW friend (TM) says:

      Passed bar the first time around… Yet… “He doesn’t read enough!! Waaah!!”

      Prom King list out bc he didn’t read enough of Gladwell or Tim Ferris books. Huge loss. Hopefully his yacht and ski lodge help him dull the pain.

      • donkin donuts says:

        this is making me lol so hard. she really thought she was soooo above him as she was such an intellectual beauty, a real catch. hope he is doing well in life.

        • Frequent Liar Miles says:

          Of course he is. He was tainted with Donkey scheme juices for like what, less than -2 months? Once his parents met her, it seems he came to his senses and noped the hell out of there pronto (no matter her claims that he “left the door open” for future reconciliation.) Very interesting pattern how Donkey’s beaux’s relatives have always discerned the nature of the beast from the get-go:
          – Dan’s parents, who took out a restraining order
          – college boyfriend’s sister who punched her in the face after credit card theft by Donkey (restraining orders also involved, I believe)
          – our very own Redacted’s Mom, who has always commented here judiciously, despite Donkey’s having made off with her knock-off Saarinen (sp?) tulip table and probably sold it for pennies on the dollar in an odd lot with well-worn Juicy sweats
          – a certain Cindy McC, who brooked no nonsense whatsoever, and had Donkey hustled off the OMG Coronado premises by security post haste
          – some members of the Easter Island Stetlers did not seem to adore her at all
          – Julie Heggerty, mom of Avocado, who has not publicly decried A Donkey, but…
          -Donkey’s own parents, same as above

          Did I miss anyone?

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            Momvocado seems to be the lone exception, though, as she still posted lots of ‘love you, miss you’ kinds of messages over the post-Avocado years.

          • Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Yes, surprisingly, Julie Hagerty is always praising La Donk. The not-too-bright mom?

          • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

            Not too bright and very woo. Seem to go hand in hand. Plus giant breast implants.

    • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      He writes like they all do. Trying so hard to capture feels in a unique way they maul the language in the process. I would cocktail fork my eye out if I ever had to carry on a conversation with any of these shills.

  6. Tingolayo says:

    Watch: Donkey will go blonde and curly, and post poetry. [“Poetry”]

  7. Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

    I can see the two of them together better than I can see him and Donkey. She has authentic self confidence, even if it is woo-based.

  8. donkin donuts says:

    I don’t exactly feel bad for donk but I feel embarassed for her. I figured Rain was just not the kind of guy to post on FB much (can’t handle looking at their pages myself) but he seems to love heaping praise on SM. She is getting ignored in front (well Facebook style) of all her woo people and none really seem to be engaging with her.

    • donkin donuts says:

      sorry for the misspelling, embarrassed

    • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

      Then she should move on! She was always just a fuckbuddy, she needs to realize that now. Just because she decided she wanted to be more doesn’t mean he did also.

      • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

        JFA: Look at his photo archive, there are tons of romantic affectionate photos with Caeli. None with Donkey. That should tell her (and everyone else) something. This was a rebound sex thing and never intended to be more.

        • Julia's Size 2-4 Dress with Pubic Lice says:

          There’s not a single shot of Donkey in his photos. Worrisome! Sad!

      • Stalker is the New Guacamole: The DJ Avocado Remixes says:

        she can’t move on, she made us a promise and she always keeps her promises! THEY ARE NEVER BREAKING UP.

  9. Grammarian says:

    if a donkey is not a public figure, does it make a sound in the forest?

    • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

      Maybe she’s just giving it up for lent.

      If a Donkey doesn’t get any attention when her crashing raft ass makes a sound in the forest, does she still even matter?

  10. Random Snowflake™ says:

    Uh oh.. Judy should be worried. 😀

    http://i.imgur.com/wrVvvIg.gif

  11. Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    Extra! Extra! Who had money on Julia becoming a “life coach?” It’s consistent with new website and locking down her social media.
    Either she’s testing the waters herself OR a potential client from Novato is…

    http://imgur.com/a/7mEpL

    • Psychotic Today says:

      Life coach is not as great as my hope for born again Christian but I will take what I can get. It’s soo crazy I have been following her since before the Prom King days. She has fallen oh so very far. But, than again, I saw her once in NYC at the end of her time here. She was riding that stupid bike in Hell’s Kitchen. It was like 100 degrees out and she was rocking a maxi dress. I swear she looked like a melting wax figure.

  12. I need Likes to validate my own feelings says:

    Lol donkey locked down her fb. Drama much, asshole?

  13. RollsRoyceRevenge says:

    If I could be candy
    I would be crunchy frog
    Lightly killed
    Filled with larks vomit

    If I could be Candyland
    I would be the game
    Only babies played
    I’m not a baby
    Oh yes you are
    Baby baby baby
    Whatcha gonna do cry
    I’m not even touching you

    If I could be Candy-O
    I would be sprawled out on a bitchin’ Camaro
    With my ten-tons of tits busting out of a mesh leotard
    And I would probably dent the hood
    You filthy whore

    If I could be Candide
    I would be the famous French novel
    I didn’t finish reading
    It was so fucking boring
    I got shitfaced one night
    And threw it out a bus window
    Then I felt bad for littering
    C’est la guerre.

    • AWO says:

      Who, I said who, are you, and with what thaumaturgy do you invoke such a spittled-soaked chronicle?

      Don’t make me take off my shirt and don a hood!

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      :::applause:::

      Or pretentious woo version…
      :::finger snaps:::

    • Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      I knew there was a reason I’ve kept this thing going.

  14. Playa con dios says:

    2nd from bottom pic

    Is that what the cops call a UNIP ?

    Unclear no in progress?

  15. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    More Stacey doggerel on display here:
    https://vimeo.com/105448555
    with added bonus of Donkey reprising Georgetown cheer-dance routine in a neo-feminist context.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      Donk’s https://s18.postimg.org/s8wkjmo3t/The_Diaper_Derriere_Donktage.png
      comes to mind

      #somethingisstankingup

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        I love that. Can you imagine the painful chafing resulting from those two-sizes-too-small underpinnings? Yet there she is waving her ass around to prove she is an Artist and Her Life is Her Canvas.

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          Again she picks the least flattering and most hideous ensemble for someone with such an unfortunately misshapen posterior.

    • Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      Oh God. Not From Stereotypes to Archetypes, with la Fraud sashaying around as a gold digger and Shanti & Myka McLaughlin bumping titties. I’d forgotten Morgenstern was in this strip show for all the boys.

      • Frequent Liar Miles says:

        IN it? She conceived it and was Ringmaster (complete with hat trick.) And one of her animal acts was A Donkey. She was obviously PAID somewhere along the line. Whether in negotiable woo talismans or whatever she could exchange for, like, food and rent money, who knows? It mystifies me: how do these people exist from day to day on a practical level, let alone having anything extra to sink into hideous headdresses?

        • Fameless Shamewhore says:

          Feminine thought leader of a new paradigm or compere at a strip club? You decide.

          (From the opening of “From Stereotypes to Archetypes”)

          Stacey Morgenstern: “So I have a request. Can you handle a request? We’d like you to move closer!”

          From the audience, the sound of clapping, male voices: “Yeah!”, “Woooh!”

          SM: “We’d like some of your loving energy…”

          Audience: “Yeah!”

          SM: “Because I have some of the finest, sexiest, sassiest, silkiest ladies that are about to (*does ‘sexy’ move*) undulate for you. Would that be pleasurable?”

          Audience: “Yes! Yeah! Turn it on! Yeah!”

          • Because, for fucks sake. says:

            It would be so much easier for them if they just hooked and admitted they’ll f*ck anyone for cash.

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        Before this even happened, and before I even knew SM’s name, I went down a Burning Man rabbit hole somewhere several years ago and found a video and some stills of her playing ringmaster to an earlier Camp Mystic sideshow like this, similarly dressed, except completely topless.

      • Playa con dios says:

        Sorta like spring break for the woo crowd, except they are slways on break

    • Donkey Schoen says:

      Whole lotta stompin’ going on.

    • playa con dios says:

      if i were in audience, i would have asked for the mic at then end, and i would say to the crowd in my best imitation strip club DJ voice:

      “OK… lets put your hands together for the archetypes… aaaand… don’t forget to tip your waitresseeeess… coming up on stage we have Amber, followed by Harmony…”

  16. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    Since the subject of cultural appropriation gets bandied about quite often here on RBD, this article on the (silly) banishment of hoop earrings possibly is of interest for some. http://reason.com/blog/2017/03/10/pitzer-college-ra-tells-white-girls-to-s#comment

  17. Handbag Is Merging Her Two Identities says:

    Aging is going to be very, very hard for these people who tie all of their self-worth to their humpability and powers of seduction. Super difficult.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      I always think this when I see the lady woos. I think Shanti is already finding out.

      • Gilly Blake, Unicorn-Studded Rainbow Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        She’s not doing herself any favors by eschewing moisturizer.

        • ShesJustStupid says:

          Same thing with Mrs. Kittay. Young woman, but her skin is beat.

          • Frequent Liar Miles says:

            I have wondered if Kitty-Kittay is actually young (relatively I mean; most everyone seems young from my ancient perspective.) She has a youthful body; I’ll grant her that. But her skin is so weathered as to make you conclude she chose to sacrifice her face to her ass at some point.

          • Frequent Liar Miles says:

            (Meaning more good fat in her diet might be in order.)

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