D’oh!

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117 Responses to D’oh!

  1. Winchester House of Faxutoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    She’s always thinking of others…when she needs something.

  2. Coa coa puffs is my new safe word says:

    Beat me by 2 minutes!

  3. ShesJustStupid says:

    She probably saw it as a networking opportunity.

    He’s Jewish, right? One would expect a quick funeral. Nice that Donkey kept up with that. Can you imagine what she would have worn?

    • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

      Isn’t she 1/27 Jewish? Shouldn’t she be aware of the burial customs?

      I can’t imagine what she would have worn…a wedding gown? a onesie? rainbow nips? Certainly, she would have had to celebrate his life with an interpretive dance. I’m sure his family would have appreciated that.

  4. Darling dearest communicates with grace says:

    embarrassing!

    • Darling dearest communicates with grace says:

      also, is it weird for her to tag him in it?

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        I thought so too.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        Weird … and fucking tasteless.

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        It may do that automatically.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

          I don’t think so — my experience is that you either type in the @symbol before a name, or in the case of names auto-populating, you still have to take the next step of literally clicking the suggested auto-pop. Besides that, this IS self-reflected-gory attn ho Julia Allison we’re talking about …

      • Stalker is the New Swanky Pants says:

        If I were him I would have never fucking forgiven her for the “tee hee my boyfriend sucks at money” post. NEVER.

    • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat whores says:

      It shows she has no friends.

      I mean, if someone you cared about died, you wouldn’t need to crowdsource the funeral info. you would just ask a common friend.

  5. ShesJustStupid says:

    She could have just read his obituary

    Funeral services will be held on Sunday January 15 at 2PM at Gan Shalom Cemetery, 1100 Bear Creek Road in Briones, CA. Arrangements entrusted to Sinai Memorial Chapel (FD1523) Lafayette, CA.
    Sinai Memorial Chapel – See more at: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/eastbaytimes/obituary.aspx?n=levi-benjamin-felix&pid=183581911&fhid=7255#sthash.B2EA4GoU.dpuf

  6. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    Five days after a not-unexpected death is when she gets around to asking about funeral arrangements for someone she claims changed her life? How little she actually cares.

    #pleasurablenamedropping #couldnotaffordtosendflowers #assfuckingholeditchpig

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Such a detailed perfectionist, that one.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        She sure was ringing you!

      • Helena (Slutty Minnie Castevet) says:

        She’s fully made of Protestant work ethic and pure class. I’m sure this is exactly how her parents behave when someone they refer to as “friend” dies.

        OT @ Never the Bride: The other day you asked about a tea that might or might not be Czech, I think; I’m sorry, what was that? I can’t find your comment now.

        • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

          I think it was called Auntie’s Tea but that’s all I remember.

          • Helena (The Same Amount of NOT) says:

            Servicey, Albie! But “Auntie’s Tea” in English or in Czech doesn’t ring any bells with me, I’m afraid.

    • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      She’s just bored because the DJ is out of town and was looking for something to do.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Also, she was too busy crowdsourcing her love life to be there anyway.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      Let’s not forget: this is the same Mulie Moutherson who SKIPPED HER OWN GRANDFATHER’S MEMORIAL SERVICE in lieu of a fauxto opp at ComiCon — that’s how little she actually cares re: those who can no longer do anything for Mulie. #DonkIthDethpicable

  7. Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

    Already taken down…so predictable.

  8. Wolf, Hemmingaway and Khaat Whores says:

    Anybody knows of any cool funerals I should be attending?

    Any important dead people worth crying for?

    I feel like grieving.

  9. Dances with Hooves says:

    she’s such a gross, inappropriate clodhopper at whatever she does. it’s obvious she has failed miserably at woo-ology. please, just go marry an accountant or podiatrist or something, and bow out gracefully from whatever it is you’re trying to do with this embarrassing online presence you think you need to maintain. it’s not working anymore. ain’t you tired, miss julia? ain’t you tired?

  10. Because, for fucks sake. says:

    I can’t find it right now, but I thought I read he was against Airbnb’ing. Please excuse the punctuation if it’s incorrect because I’ve never had to write it out before.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      I think he’s quoted as saying something like charging someone $300 a night to stay in your apartment is not a true sharing economy.

      • Because, for fucks sake. says:

        Yes, I found it!

        “He believed the “sharing economy” was sharing a pet rock or a hand-written note, not charging someone $345 to stay at your apartment.”

  11. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    I’m sure she’ll make it to the next funeral if he dies again.

    • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      Only if they serve cupcakes

      • My Tribe Doesn't Have an Easy-To-Spell Name So White Girls Never Appropriate us says:

        And as long as it features a step and repeat.

  12. Grammarian says:

    The unfinished basement, so cold, so emotional, so bleak

  13. Ser Donksalot says:

    Strindberg. Miss Julie. Oy. Camp Grounded founder dies, Jujubees checked out of social media. Isn’t it ironic? Not that the lyrics are all exemplars of irony but:

    “It’s like rain on your wedding day
    It’s a free ride when you’ve already paid
    It’s the good advice that you just didn’t take
    Who would’ve thought, it figures”

    • Midwestern Verve Clicquot says:

      The fact that nobody tried to contact her personally about it is telling. One of my childhood friends lost her mother a few years ago, and in her grief, she found it in her to reach out to all of us hometown kids to give us info on the services so we could attend. Most of us hadn’t even spoken in years.

      The fact that nobody in the woo tribe had a moment where they thought, “Oh man, someone should tell Julia,” tells SO MUCH about a) what people in that crew think of her, and b) how little Levi Felix probably considered Julia when he was alive.

      Julia, you routinely lose friends because you’re a shithead who perpetually chooses clinging to her own fragile ego over maybe accepting every now and then that you’re wrong and trying to change. Incidentally, your astounding levels of egocentrism are why you’ll never find a life partner. The kind of man you seek is never going to want to be an eternal doormat.

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        The other telling thing is that she seem to have no contact with him over the past year other than seeing him at Camp Gounded with Choad last May (probably freeloading). LF apparently was feeling pretty well until around December. He got married to Brooke in October and there are pictures of the wedding . Donkey wasn’t invited, she never mentioned it or congratulated them on Facebook. She’s doing her typical thing here where she’s pretending they had a closer relationship than they actually did.

        • Dances with Hooves says:

          Remember when she posted about her bff Joan Rivers? Complete with a pic. After Rivers died, of course. Name-dropping with the deceased, always a classy move and not at all tacky or completely inappropriate.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            The JIML always has a BFF who has a fatal disease and is dying. Of course, she barely knows the BFF and the last-minute grieving ends up being all about her.

          • Fameless Shamewhore says:

            Yes, what is that? A close relative does the exact same thing. She’s not exactly *pleased* that people she knows are dead or dying – but somehow the long discussions about their tragic fates is really pleasing to her. The conversations on these topics are always “off”.

        • Little Orphan Lilly says:

          Bizarrely, I only realized after LF’s death that we grew up in the same city and had several childhood friends in common. A few FB posts made me realize the connection (in biographical detail only, of course), but to a person they were just sharing personal memories of him; no links, no tagging, just a quiet reflection.

          I’ve actually written this comment and deleted it a few times because it feels like I’m going “WAIT NO I’M IMPORTANT BY PROXY TOO”—not my intention at all, it was just strange to realize another RBD connection in my real life. Although I guess this does qualify me to pull a Julia and begin publically weeping and expounding on our close personal tie.

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          I just took a peek at his Facebook wall from 2016. Judy did not comment on any of his posts, and the only one she liked was a birthday post, though most people commented on this one but she did not. And this was after he had discovered his Brain cancer and had undergone a lot of difficult treatment. So you can see how much she actually cared.

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        Yes, this is the quintessential Judy. Not invited, tries to crowdsource an invitation, is too late. Story of your life, Donkey. Try to hit the learn button for once.

        • Helena (Slutty Minnie Castevet) says:

          THIS. Lord, she’s the worst. THE WORST. This makes me disproportionately vommy. I may need to breathe through the fear and vom.

      • Unlicensed therapist says:

        A woman I worked with years ago and stayed Facebook friends with passed last year — it was clear who would always remember her fondly among former associates and who were close friends

  14. Stalker is the New single on Facebook says:

    I read a really good book this weekend called “Wolf Winter” by Cecilia Ekback (with umlaut over the a). Amazing, check it out. Then I started “Sharp Objects” by Gillian Flynn right after, inadvertantly carrying on the mother-daughter/survival theme.

  15. Razzmatazz says:

    She tagged a dead guy.

    SHE TAGGED A DEAD GUY.

  16. Jullia Allison Bouger says:

    I wonder whether there was a request from Levi that she specifically not be told about the details of his funeral? That everyone shut their mouths until the day after, so she’d have no chance of crashing it?

    • Not! Random! says:

      Seems likely. Who would want all that braying at their memorial service? Or their pleasurable bachelorette party? Or their infinite wedding?

      Poor donkey gets left out of all the marquee events.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      I can’t imagine that she ever crossed his mind …

      • Worrisome Pelts says:

        Yeah. As annoying as we find her, I have a feeling most people just gloss right over her and keep moving.

  17. Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

    Smellsberg weighs in:

    Last week, I had the pleasure of giving a toast at the beautiful wedding of my ex-wife (and current soul-sister) Jena la Flamme and her new beloved Sacha Nielsen (officiated by my mother Patricia Ellsberg!)
    Here’s what I said:
    Jena, your happiness was, and still is, one of the most important things in my life.
    And so, Sacha, I’m grateful to you for bringing so much wonder into Jena’s life. She’s happier than I’ve ever seen her, and that means the world to me.
    Jena, our deepest vow was always to support each other in joy and flourishing. Our journey together–both the joyful parts and the difficult parts–forged me into the man I am today. I will always be grateful to you for that. And I’m proud to have supported you in flourishing into the woman ready to dive into the love of your life, with Sacha.
    I know that you want to have children together–and as the soul-brother to *both* of you now–I can’t wait to be the *soul-uncle* to your future children.
    Long live Jena and Sacha!

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      :::eyeroll:::

      Those kids will suffer. Two narcissist parents? Oh, no, honey.

    • Coa coa puffs is my new safe word says:

      not sure which position would be more awkward.

      A guy who has his bride’s ex is gushing all over her at wedding.

      A guy who’s ex had orgie with his mom.

      • Bride of Donkenstein (The Me I Am When I'm With You) says:

        Oedipus Retch

      • Wolf, Hemmingway and Khaat Whores says:

        “Orgy” and “mom” are two words I don’t want to see in the same sentence.

        Ever.

        Pass me the NACHOS!!!!, please.

    • Coa coa puffs is my new safe word says:

      Oh and wait, does he not already have children that he should be taking care of?

      If then no self respecting man should have any respect for such a man

      • Not! Random! says:

        Perhaps it’s all part of the plan. Smellsberg — to his credit — refused to have kids with Jena because he did not want to pass along his mental health issues. They unconsciously coupled so that Jena could find a willing sperm donor (she’s been very explicit about that), and then the whole clan gathers to put their blessing on this new union with a deadbeat dad who has no problem abandoning his kids and who will be facing deportation in a matter of months. Seems to me that he’ll end up being more than a “soul uncle” to their child, if you get my drift.

    • Winchester House of Faxutoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

      *Please clap* he just Jeb Bushed this post.

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        You never go full Jeb!, ever.

        I guess this answers my question from earlier. Sweet God, Papa Ellsberg must pray constantly for the sweet oblivion of death. I used to have respect for that man.

        • Winchester House of Faxutoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

          I know, when I started my *journey* (don’t worry I’m throat punching myself) I had a lot of respect for him and the decisions he made. I even did a compare and contrast between he and Snowden but, this has all left a bad taste in my mouth and scabbed sores over my eyes.
          The spawn is just so needy with no talent.

    • grammarian says:

      cannot believe she got the harlem townhouse

      unless maybe they are sharing

    • BunnyBingo says:

      The poor kids he already has. I get the feeling everyone else in the picture will be required to play adoring audience to Jena and Sacha’s magical lurve or GTFO.

  18. ShesJustStupid says:

    FYI, it’s that time of the year to pour one out for Donks Davos Report.

  19. Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

    Hmm, Hawaii seems to have fallen off ILYR’s tour schedule in Feb.

  20. Donkey Schoen says:

    Other than nisha, I have seen no evidence that of any of the other social goddesses attended a march today. Such activists!

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