Countdown To Jena & Sacha’s “Dance To Infinity” (Marriage)

Flim Flam and DJ Deadbeat Dad have composed a poem in celebration of their impending pair bonding, a rainbow of hope for all the dreamcatchers!

2 more days until the Infinite Wedding…. Excited!!!!

~ An Infinite Wedding ~

The time has come for us to gather,
The caretakers of the Fire of our Love,
To witness our union.

In this ceremony we
Unite our souls’ purpose,
Weave new dreams,
Step onto the Earth in rhythm,
And embrace the truth of our hearts.

We are all that is,
Together,
On the same boat,
On the same ground,
In the sovereignty of our hearts.
United by choice,
We choose each other in every moment.
In openness to never-ending growth.

In unison we sing,
Free birds,
Who journey together.

This wedding is for we, the Couple,
And also we, the Community,
To Unite,
Embrace each other,
And dance to infinity.

We invite your witness,
As we look into each other eyes,
Mirroring all of our shadow
And all of our light,
And embrace both in eternal love.

This an Infinite Wedding.

By Jena la Flamme & Sacha Nielsen
Image by Sacha Nielsen
www.sachanielsen.com

Donkey is still AWOL on Facebook, but she and Rain will hopefully attend the clothing-optional nuptials. The only person definitively attending is Christina Morassi, the leering grifter who thinks women should use their sexuality in the workplace. Charmed.

Bottom Picture! Wali attempts to bond with Ali in the hopes of getting some orgy time in the new Mercedes van:

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149 Responses to Countdown To Jena & Sacha’s “Dance To Infinity” (Marriage)

  1. Unlicensed therapist says:

    First first first

  2. Psycho-delic Ballerina says:

    Top photo reminds me of the picture games in children’s magazines!

    So, Jena is a dove, a tiger, some gears (?) and a planet; that dirty man is an eagle and some orbs; and they both are a moth, an eclipse, and the very scary face of a man-pig. A match made in woo heaven.

  3. Stalker is the New Regime says:

    betch if you get married that’s on you, I’m not your fire caretaker, that’s for YOU to take care of. These people just want a community to do their work for them. & fund their stupid ideas.

    I will witness it though. Trainwrecks are my weakness.

  4. Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

    Donkey doesn’t miss any wedding she can crash and dominate. If ILYRAIN is lucky, he’ll have a gig far away that night.

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      Phuckedupphace is free this Wednesday, but maybe he’ll head out early for Phriday’s gig in Portland, Maine?

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        Also, who has a wedding on a Wednesday night? People who don’t know anyone with jobs, that’s who.

      • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

        Portland Maine in January…lol

        • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

          He has a Hawaii thing in February, which I’m sure Judy will crash.

        • Tingolayo says:

          Do you think he’ll pack a shirt?

        • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

          I love Portland, and there are a surprising number of young hipster/hippies/weedlords who would probably be Chad’s target audience, but January is not its finest moment.

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            It is a cool place. I almost got a job there in the late 1990s. I don’t think I could have managed the winters, though.

  5. Razzmatazz says:

    She didn’t try to rhyme this time, I see that as progress.

    Funny that “the Community” gets a shoutout, but stepchildren do not. Invisible wedding for them, not infinite.

  6. Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

    Vom to infinity.

    And beyond!

  7. BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

    This feels like a second Christmas! I can’t wait for this wedding!

  8. Tingolayo says:

    This wedding is for we. I kan’t.

    I’m guessing that an Infinite Wedding as about as meaningful and lasting as a Witch Wife. And a self wedding. And a Year of Foundation. And a book contract.

    • Tingolayo says:

      JFA: That’s a klassy shill for your website in your wedding announcement. Can’t they ever do anything that’s not transactional and commercialized?

  9. Helena (Slutty Minnie Castevet) says:

    LOL @ Wali

    • Worrisome Pelts says:

      I’ll give him this: that drawing *is* making then same face I pull when I read about these clowns.

    • Dances with Hooves says:

      I was going to post the same. Love the sudden shift between the woos’ dumb heartfelt replies, then bam there’s wali with his random comments and the fricken dog hahaha

    • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

      Fozzie also commented. Shanti and one her sycophants don’t seem pleased:

      Michael Jacobs This was always my favorite photo of you when I FB stalked you before we were realized 🙂

      Brad Axelrad Stalker

      Ali Shanti Brad Axelrad lol, the OG stalker.

      Brad Axelrad Hahaha. Classic

  10. AWO says:

    Yes, but will this be a countably or uncountably infinite wedding?

    • Worrisome Pelts says:

      Myriad Matrimonial Moments

    • Telexfree Antofagasta says:

      At this rate, how dirty and greasy will her 3rd husband be? Finitely curious.

      • Tingolayo says:

        Isn’t Swiss Mess her third? I think she was married before Smellsberg.

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          Yes, and she dumped him for some woman she met at Burning Man.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Third time’s the charm, yes? Surely some layabout DJ and space case who can’t afford to buy his kids Christmas presents and is on the prowl for a green card will stick around in perpetuity?

  11. New Trier HS grad says:

    Why bother marrying at all?????
    They claim to be living a new enlightened age— with side partners etc.

    Could this just be for Swiss Monster’s green card?

    She seems to be all about the 💰/francs/$

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      Yes on green card. It really is the only explanation.

    • Not! Random! says:

      This is the man-child who crowd-sourced funds to buy his kids Xmas presents. The gold-digger did not hit paydirt this time. Just … dirt.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Because all these woos are conventional. Why did the Kittays have THREE weddings? The Tree and Lala? Even Shanti seems desperate to lock a guy down. And we know Donks has been waiting for this her whole life. It actually must kill her that Flim Flam is getting hitched. Not the dude, but the ATTENTION.

      The masculine provides, people.

  12. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    TOP PIC: #AnInfiniteShedding #TerminalHairlossity

  13. Fell off the rainbow raft says:

    Speaking of weddings, can we talk about me me me?
    Recently expired, recently engaged, completely overwhelmed by all the decisions to be made. The cat ladies and gents are a wise bunch, I could use some advice!
    What’s important and money is worth it, where can I save, and how do you best manage strong personalities that will most likely clash?

    • Worrisome Pelts says:

      You probably won’t have a chance to notice a lot of the details on the day and, honestly, your guests don’t care. Spend the money on things you will actually enjoy then or later (food, music, booze, good photographer) and don’t get an ulcer over favors/tablecloths/whatever.

      As for clashing personalities, this is one of the few times in your life you can reasonably insist that everyone else do what you want. They can get along or they can shut up and pretend to get along. Those are the only options.

      Embrace your inner Donkey and have things your own (and your spouses) way.

      Also: CONGRATULATIONS!

      • Fell off the rainbow raft says:

        Okay thanks wp! I wanted to skip decorating everything since no one would notice and we’re paying a couple thousand for the venue already since it has all the views (water, trees, historic houses).

    • grammarian says:

      elope

      • MYwoogasm says:

        Co-sign. Go on your dream honeymoon or buy a house instead. Wedddings are bullshit.

        • Stalker is the New Regime says:

          thirded. it’s just.one.day.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

          Yeah, skip the wedding; buy a house — throw a hellacious 5th-anniversary party for yourselves in your by-that-time awesome backyard, attended by people of your choosing.

      • Fell off the rainbow raft says:

        We seriously considered this. Too much money just so granny can be happy we’re not living in sin any longer.

    • Ali Shanti's Pubic Lice says:

      Congratulations!

      I am sad and single and expired and have no advice other than do what makes you two happy, but another thing I always appreciate as a wedding guest is transpo to/from the venue if there’s no public transpo and you’re having an open bar.

      • Fell off the rainbow raft says:

        Thanks, I hadn’t thought about that but it’s definitely something that we need to include!

    • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

      Open bar, maybe with just beer and cider and wine unless you feel strongly about cocktails (I felt more strongly about not having some of the cocktail drinkers in my family get a real drunk on). Having a daytime wedding, unless you feel strongly about dancing, can be both fun and less expensive.

      Most of all, do what you two like. If you like barbecue, have barbecue. If you love brunch, have brunch food (even in the evening). If you love bluegrass, have bluegrass. If you love Gregorian chant, don’t invite me to your wedding, chant away.

      I think spending on food and drink is more important than spending on decor (which is one of the advantages of having a daytime wedding IMO, you just need simple rustic flowers and you’re good to go).

      • Fell off the rainbow raft says:

        Good ideas Albie, thanks! We haven’t decided about the booze yet because there are some relatives that get real shitty when drunk and it happens quickly. I wasn’t sure if anyone would bitch if we limited it to just beer and wine but having the wedding earlier in the day might curb drinking.

    • Wonkeye says:

      Newly married here. Invest in food and booze, not an expensive dress or rings. Rein in the guest list immediately and don’t be bullied into inviting anyone you dislike or don’t know. Expect that at least a few close family members or friends will be complete dicks.

      • Fell off the rainbow raft says:

        Thanks wonkeye! Yea unfortunately we’re already feeling bullied into inviting people we didn’t want and I’m feeling stuck about how to respond when they aren’t respecting my firm no.

    • Psychotic Today says:

      Congrats! Newly married catlady here. My advice: YOU CANNOT MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY SO DO NOT TRY! The only people who need to be happy on your wedding day are you and your spouse. People will have opinions but eh…. Do what will make you guys happy. But def make sure you serve booze. It’ll keep everyone happy. Have a great time! Let me know if you need any help planning. I am very good and have some tips.

      • Fell off the rainbow raft says:

        Thanks! I kept feeling like everyone wants me to do things their way and won’t listen to what we really want. Had to remind myself after the last meeting went awry that not everyone can be happy so whatevs.

        • Psychotic Today says:

          Exactly! You’ll need to remind yourself this a lot during the planning process but it’ll be ok. I promise you, the day of your wedding all of the other stuff becomes white noise. Good luck! My wedding and honeymoon were the best parts of the shitty shitty year that was 2016.

  14. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    Uh, they have a wedding registry: https://www.zola.com/registry/jenaandsacha, including the “Jena & Sacha Migrate to California Fund” and the traditional matrimonial “Legal Alien gets Green Card Fund.”

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      $1,300 MacBook

      • Winchester House of Fauxtoshoots, Microphones, & Ghosted Book Deals says:

        These people are certifiable, truly. Image the passice-aggressive posting when no one buys them a single item from their list. People just don’t support green card love like they used to.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        Will [REDACTED] be attending this magical pair bonding?

    • Fameless Shamewhore says:

      O.M.G. This is the most grasping thing I have maybe ever seen on RBD. And that’s saying something. That is some next level grifting.

      I’m posting the entire list here. Sorry, not sorry, that it’s SOOOO long. We can then decide what we want to buy for the happy couple. Who are not at all interested in material things. And are really very spiritual. And are part of the new paradigm of living life in an unselfish way.

      ZOLA WEDDING REGISTRY
      Jena and Sacha

      Thank you for supporting our Union and our future. Your Love and Presence are the Greatest gifts, and if you’d like to gift us physical presents, here are our desires.

      “Jena & Sacha Migrate to California Fund” – Contribute what you wish
      We would love to be welcome in your beautiful nest, a special place you love and want to share with us. Email, Jenalaflamme@gmail.com

      “Legal Alien gets Green Card Fund” – Contribute what you wish
      Sacha, the legal alien, is applying for a green card. Help us with the red tape 🙂

      “Weekend or week use of your Home (Anywhere in the World) – Contribute what you wish
      We would love to be welcome in your beautiful nest, a special place you love and want to share with us.

      “1+/- Hour(s) of Your Advice, Coaching or Guidance (send an email to let us know what you would like to offer)” – Contribute what you wish
      You have the most valuable gift to offer us: a precious and unique skill, and an hour of your valuable time. Email Jenalaflamme@gmail.com, to let us know what is your present.

      “1+/- Hour(s) of Your Skills (send an email to let us know what you would like to offer)” – Contribute what you wish
      You are amazing with your skills and what you can offer is it. Tell us what you would love to co-create with us. Email Jenalaflamme@gmail.com to let us know what you would like to offer. Photography, videography, video editing, graphic design, interior design, art, carpentry, technical support, the sky is the limit.

      “1+/- Hour(s) of Your time as a Body Worker (send an email to let us know what you would like to offer)” – Contribute what you wish
      We love your touch and healing tallent. Let us know is you want to offer an hour of your valuable time to heal and give love to our body temple. Email Jenalaflamme@gmail.com

      “1+/- Hour(s) of Your Time Teaching (send an email to let us know what you would like to offer)” – Contribute what you wish
      You are a yoga, dance, art, singer, player teacher and want to offer us some of your medicinal knowledge. We would love to receive it. Let us know by Email Jenalaflamme@gmail.com

      “Wicked and the Freakiest GIFTS ever!” – Contribute what you wish
      We REALLY LOVE surprises and AWESOMENESS, and would like for you to feel free to gift us what you want when ever you want. So what ever the genius IDEA you wanna share and co- create with us, let us know. Email Jenalaflamme@gmail.com

      Macbook $1,299
      This product has been added by the couple from another website and cannot be shipped to you, the couple will redeem it at their convenience.

      Casablanca Market Moroccan Morjana Tea Glass, Green, Set Of 6 $29
      This product has been added by the couple from another website and cannot be shipped to you, the couple will redeem it at their convenience.

      Casablanca Market Moroccan Morjana Glasses, 4-Inch By 2.5-Inch, Violet, Set Of 6 $38
      This product has been added by the couple from another website and cannot be shipped to you, the couple will redeem it at their convenience.

      Laura Stemless Wine Glass, Set of 4 $20 was $40
      Mikasa Laura Collection features clear elegant crystal that will shine beautifully in the light. This high-quality European-made crystal will coordinate beautifully with any dinnerware or flatware pattern. Crafted of superior quality material, offering long lasting use, this casual drinkware is great for everyday use or entertaining occasions. Made of Lead-Free Crystal. Dishwasher safe. Set of 4 stemless wine glasses, each holds 18-1/4 ounces.

      Michelangelo Champagne Flute, Set of 4 $25
      Who says champagne is only for special occasions? With these Michelangelo flutes, you have stemware that’s durable enough for everyday use. So, pop the bubbly, raise a glass and toast to years of happiness and bliss with your love! Salute!

      Features:

      Ultra-clear, break-resistant, lead-free and dishwasher safe in Luigi Bormioli’s proprietary SPARKX formula
      Titanium-reinforced stems
      Machine-blown from Parma, Italy

      Classic C1 Capri Canister Vacuum $399
      With a telescopic stainless steel wand and an electrical cord that includes automatic rewind, Miele’s Classic C1 Capri Canister vacuum boasts a total cleaning radius of almost 30 feet. This vacuum is specifically recommended for low pile carpets, area rugs, and hard floors.

      Dust and dirt are no match for this machine, which features two floor tools. The Turbo Comfort Turbobrush, ideal for cleaning low to medium pile carpeting, area rugs and all smooth flooring, contains a rotating roller brush to efficiently loosen stubborn dirt. The Parquet floor tool, with long, soft natural bristles, cleans tile, wood, and other smooth surfaces thoroughly without damaging the floor.

      Includes:

      Durable hose with stainless steel telescopic wand
      Turbo comfort Turbobrush
      Parquet floor tool
      Dusting brush
      Upholstery tool
      Crevice nozzle
      AirClean bag and filter
      1-year warranty, 7-year motor warranty
      Features:

      Safety shutoff in case of overheating
      FilterBag change indicator
      Dual parking positions
      Retractable cord
      Quiet operation
      Rotary dial with six variable power settings
      Made in Germany

      Larabee Dot Bouquet Vase from Kate Spade New York $75
      The Larabee Dot collection is all about classic design with a twist!. Featuring traditional designs topped with etched polka dots, these pieces have an extra dose of cheer. This fine crystal vase offers a lovely way to display romantic bouquets and farmers market blooms. It will dress up simple wildflowers, and add playful elegance to an already formal arrangement.

      Mango Wood Salad Bowl $78
      This mango wood salad bowl is beautifully created to help elevate your dinner table.

      Wood Classics Tulip Salad Bowl by Dansk $50
      For those who prefer a more natural, raw look in their decor, the wood classics collection from Dansk offers bowls, trays and utensils to suit your needs. Because greens, whether lettuce, guacamole or a spread of raw veggies, just look more rich and tasty with a wooden backdrop. So, serve your favorite salads and starters in dishes that bring a natural touch to your spread. Your guests will eat it up.

      Assam Tea Press by Boden $25
      Bodum’s classic Assam tea press utilizes the same brewing system as the French Press to allow for full control of the tea steeping process. The silicone plunger locks tea leaves into the bottom of the filter once brewing is complete, cutting off access of water to the tea leaves, which allows tea to be recycled for multiple uses. The tea press is perfect for use with any loose leaf tea or tea bags. The silicone rim secures filter firmly into the teapot for precision pouring, and stays cool to the touch for safe removal.

      • dr. cupcake cray cray says:

        Those Mikasa stemless wine glasses are an absolute must on playa!

      • dr. cupcake cray cray says:

        Also, kate spade is awfully mainstream for a woo goddess, isn’t it? I mean, I love the larabee dot stuff myself, but can something mass-produced and available at Macy’s really be an appropriate gift for a woo wedding?

        • Fameless Shamewhore says:

          Exactly! That list is so bourgeois.

          “This mango wood salad bowl is beautifully created to help elevate your dinner table”
          “This fine crystal vase …will…add playful elegance to an already formal arrangement”
          “Crafted of superior quality material, offering long lasting use, this casual drinkware is great for everyday use or entertaining occasions”.

          And my favourite, the champagne glasses.

          “Who says champagne is only for special occasions? With these Michelangelo flutes, you have stemware that’s durable enough for everyday use. So, pop the bubbly, raise a glass and toast to years of happiness and bliss with your love! Salute!”

      • Stalker is the New Regime says:

        So many glasses! They literally do nothing but drink? And a vacuum cleaner to suck up the shards after Jena wings one at Sasha’s head for NOT. FUCKING. DOING. BODY.WORK. RIGHT.

        • Stalker is the New Regime says:

          oh plus one salad bowl each. The alcoholic eating disordered table setting of choice.

      • Morrocanwear Loves You Rain says:

        I think I would like to gift the happy couple with a stay at the home of one of my friends with small children. I would also like to donate my time as a body worker with a fist to his nose.

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          Might they also watch my fifth grader? We need a new babysitter and I heard these two work for chocolates.

          • Moroccanwear Loves You Rain says:

            Your fifth grader is too delightful for these two. I have some children in mind who I love, but who are extremely difficult to be around if you don’t have experience with sensory disorders or ADHD.

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        Incredible. Basically they want money to move to CA and get Deadbeat a green card. How many months now since he’s seen his kids? Three? He’s on a six month tourist visa probably.

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          If moving to California and expecting wedding guests to pay for it, Smegma clearly has NO interest in returning to see those kids anytime soon and I’ll bet he’s paying NOTHING in child support.

        • Winchester House of Faxutoshoots, Microphones & Ghosted Book Deals says:

          I’m only shocked she didn’t add a space to hire an attorney for her cab *accident* where she was dancing 5 minutes later.
          No one’s happiness is built on someone else’s unhappiness and on his end it appears he’s left a trail of destruction.
          Over-under three months to passive-aggressive posts about how a spouse should be supportive, and the masculine should pay and, six months to *conscious uncoupling*

      • donkey schoen says:

        A vacuum cleaner?? A FUCKING VACUUM CLEANER??? You are registering for shit AND a green card AND glasses?? What the fuck is wrong with this people?? How about save your fucking money like the rest of us do by not traveling around to every goddam sunrise yoni pubic festival and voila! You might have your goddam vacuum cleaner.

        • Not! Random! says:

          A vacuum cleaner makes perfect sense, given that the queen of hair loss is marrying Pigpen.

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        The constant use of “nest” is so gross. So they are going to move to CA? And they want someone to give them a place to live? I don’t even understand that one. Or does “migrate” just mean for the winter or something?

        I hope he overstays his visa and then leaves and tries to get back into the US. Not going to be fun.

      • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

        Can you laugh and vomit at the same time?

        Asking for a friend.

      • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

        Well, at least they only asked for one of the cheaper Mieles. I suppose that’s something.

    • Bray kin the law says:

      “One hour play party in back of van”

    • Energy Pussy (brought to you by BIG TAMPON) says:

      OMG, I thought you were kidding about green card fund!

      • Energy Pussy (brought to you by BIG TAMPON) says:

        JFAing- We should offer her an hour in the Basement, lol.

        • Bray kin the law says:

          One month rbd membership, valued at $100, includes access to premium content and full archives

        • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

          Along with some virtual Franzia. But that is a definite NO to Aunt Gilly giving Fric & Frac 1+ hour of my time as a body worker.

          • Worrisome Pelts says:

            No PB and Percoset sammies for those two, either. The don’t deserve Dr. Gary’s mom’s finest.

          • Nosferatu-tu says:

            Is that a sexological body worker?
            And WP, you could not be more correct about them not being deserving of the traditional basement sacred medicine!

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      About that Green Card Fund they’re crowdsourcing … I googled ‘reasons for denial’ & really have to wonder how they get beyond the financial hurdle …

      Inadmissibility Reasons for a Green Card Application Denial

      Even if you fit an eligibility category, a ground of inadmissibility can cause a green card application denial. It’s rather obvious that spies and terrorists will be denied a green card, but ordinary people with certain ailments and financial situations can also get denied. Applicants must demonstrate that they don’t pose a danger to U.S. society on financial, health, security, immigration violation, or criminal grounds.

      Financial
      The U.S. relative that sponsors you will need to show sufficient income or assets to support you at 125% of the U.S. poverty guidelines (in addition to supporting his/her own family). If you can’t support yourself, this measure helps to ensure that you won’t depend on government assistance. To review the current poverty guidelines levels, see Form I-864P.

      Health
      You will be required to have a medical examination conducted by a USCIS designated physician. The examination is required to establish that an applicant is not a public health risk such as a carrier of a disease that presents a public health risk, or having a dangerous physical or mental disorder. See Form I-693.

      Immigration Violations
      Your immigration history will be reviewed. The application will likely be denied if you have overstayed a visa by six months or more, or if you have ever entered the country unlawfully. The government will also seek to determine if the parent’s visa (if applicable) has ever been misused.

      Criminal Record
      You will certainly run into problems if you have committed certain crimes, like aggravated felonies, drug crimes, or acts of terrorism.

    • So beyond says:

      My my green card fund, bye Felicia. All they do is travel and asking for money bitch slap, I would not give anything to a deadbeat dad and an ugly , old looking loser balding basic bitch.

  15. ethel-egg says:

    Infinite wedding. Finite marriage. No mention of children or family.

    THIS IS A RECIPE FOR SUCCESS.

  16. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    Was this discussed here & I just missed it?

    starts at 17:10 http://www.emotionallybrokenpsychos.com/?p=1753 ends at 33:00

    What is this binding of Julia’s hooves by (?)Roxie all about? Later, a tell / tale / tail of Donk trying desperately, at one a.m. on some new year’s morn, to leak her breakup w/ [REDACTED] to the gawker gal. Sad. RBD gets a few shout-outs (nothing too harsh).

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      the rant that follows is much more interesting

      • Delicious Bowl of Wali Rahman says:

        She criticizes RBD for being haters, yet everything she says is just as mean as what you find here.

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          Agreed. Lots of projecting from that one. Also, annoying vocal fry and upspeak, and too many uses of “like”. Not a great aural presence for podcasting or radio. And this isn’t even taking into account the banal content.

          She misses the whole point about RBD being a snarky community of very funny and perceptive people who like each other and enjoy watching the unfolding train wrecks in Donkey’s orbit.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            My God, who is this idiot? I made it through 10 minutes of the initial Psych 101 lecture, with “like” and “fuck” being inserted every other word, as though she’d just walked in from The Galleria, circa 1985. She wrote for Gawker? Or did she just work there as weekend cleaning staff?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            I know nothing. Just wondering
            about that binding incident …

          • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

            Probably just part of some bondage demo at Camp Septic during Burning Man.

          • Ali Shanti's Pubic Lice says:

            Jesus what a screech. I’d almost rather listen to Ali Shitty talk.

          • Ali Shanti's Pubic Lice says:

            and she called it Mare-in. HAHAHA

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            https://www.facebook.com/mollsmcaleer

            A dedicated reader mentioned to me that the lovely Ms. McAleer is a stoner and a drunk. She wrote a shitty memoir and self published it on Amazon. She now likes to brag about the house she bought in Glendale (where she podcasts from) from a former Bachelor contestant.

          • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

            Molls would like to thank The Academy:

            http://gawker.com/5065364%2Fand-then-there-was-molls

          • Lasagna Ass Bitch says:

            She was actually one of the writers for Two Broke Girls.

            It’s telling how much the audience here has changed that no-one knows who Molls is.

          • Mrs. Gilly Blake says:

            I know who she is, as does the RBDer who told me this was McAleer’s lousy blog. She apparently fucked up the 2 Broke Girls gig but made some $ when selling Hello Giggles.

            Hi Molls!

          • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

            @Lasagna I think maybe people just never paid too much attention to her. IIRC she wasn’t on regular Gawker but I do remember her vaguely as someone affiliated with the site who moved to LA and was possibly a partner-in-crime to another Gawker person like Blakely, maybe? It seems so long ago, I just have a dim memory from 2005-ish.

          • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

            Writing for 2 Broke Girls is hardly something to brag about!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            I think the local station affiliate that syndicates the re-runs is STILL doing a ca$h giveaway ea episode to lure in viewers, it’s THAT unfunny.

          • dinkle donkle says:

            Oh wow, she hasn’t changed much since her Defamer days, has she? I will never unsee her sexy bedbug photoshoot.
            https://cdn-images-1.medium.com/max/800/0*CtWOrL4Ycdw2j574.jpg

      • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

        Oh. My. God. She is insufferable. I gather she has a podcast about reality shows?

        Jesus. If I were a regular listener, this is the point that I would shut it off and never ever tune in again. She has been yammering on about not getting paid for her dumb content non-stop for 15 minutes and there’s no end in sight.

        I almost want to see how long she continues to ramble but I’m bored now. I feel sorry for her kids if she ever has any… can you imagine getting never-ending lectures like this about some bullshit or other on a regular basis?

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

          Hence my tongue-in-cheek ‘much more interesting’ comment — try as she may to answer the Mass Despized fan (oh hai, Donkey!) who wrote in asking for an update, Moll (Molls?) just couldn’t, no way no how, make Julia Allison even remotely interesting.

          • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

            Yeah, it was peculiar how she characterized Donk and RBNS/RBD. I agreed with a couple of things but a lot of it seemed off. If she only checks RBD once a year then she misses a lot of what goes on here.

            That rant, tho. She should play that for her therapist.

      • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

        I don’t have any opinion about Molly M, but two things struck me. First, she buys Judy’s story that she’s now a SF hippie out of the public eye; however her current inability to get media coverage doesn’t mean that Judy has given up trying to be ineffably famous (e.g., the delusion book proposal or her current self-label as a “public speaker”, not to mention Coobies and trying to be the face of Burning Man). After Judy’s last appearance on CNN and looney Twitter fight with the Navajo rep, I think her manager couldn’t find her TV work at as a “personality” (I wonder if he still manages her—there was that photo with Garry Marshall out the blue about a year ago that he arranged), and after the CNN debacle there Judy was, suddenly an “expert on happiness” writing a sure-fire bestseller to get back into the public eye. And Molly’s thing of taking Judy at face value goes right back to the early coverage on Gawker; Gawker seemed to be the last one to notice Judy’s emperor’s new clothes problem (or rather, hate-reading about her put those pageview pennies in Denton’s cup). Molly also recycles the line that Judy was “so brave” to “put herself out there.” But there’s a big difference between putting yourself out there when you have something to offer, and being a vapid attention whore with no discernible talent other than getting your picture taken and basking in reflected glory.

        • Ali Shanti's Pubic Lice says:

          My opinion of her is pretty terrible. I think she is the worst kind of Hollywood hanger-on.

          Besides her awful voice and grating personality, the fact that she claims to check RBD “once a year, maybe” while CLEARLY being up on the lingo and in-jokes makes me think she shows her ass.

          Ugh. I think, as sad as it is to be a “Bravolebrity,” it’s even worse to base your podcast on being really, truly mean about them.

          I have some other mean thoughts but I won’t.

  17. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    In Donkey related news, one of the redacted’s, also a talented and successful tech guy and victim of the lunatic’s vengefulness (the infamous “overlap” email that I suspect was her NYC Waterloo), just sold a company that he cofounded for fuck-you money to the tune of $425 million. Just imagine how much better he could have done with business consultant Judy’s advice!

    • Handbag Is Merging Her Two Identities says:

      I know it was probably the other redacted that got her goat the most, but I’ve always thought the loss of this one — he who was supposed to worship her, endured a lot of abuse by her, and eventually broke free and married someone else — is VERY painful. So now he’s handsome, sweet, married, *and* rich. OOPS.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        And she might be engaged to a balding middle-aged DJ who was living at his sister’s.

        THIS IS SUCCESS!!

        • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

          And who won’t even spring for her dinner out, let alone pose in a onesie or a Christmas sweater, or take pictures of him picking her up like a sack of potatoes.

          • Albie Quirky Sending Hugs says:

            Or take “Single” off his Facebook.

          • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

            A shirtless, balding, middle-aged, dirt festival DJ is embarrassed to be associated with her. Let that sink in…

            Even Avocado was at least happy to call her his girlfriend.

  18. Fameless Shamewhore says:

    I actually actively and deeply disapprove of that particular list. We’re talking about two adults, both of whom have been married before, one of whom has children who are young enough to really, really need active and hands-on parenting (by which I mean they are not grown kids, or already in college).

    And – these are two people who are pretending to better than everyone else, more in touch with the natural world, more caring, more special.

    I would respect a gift registry which asked their friends to donate to a charity of their choice.

    I would respect a gift registry that involved buying things for his kids (who are now her responsibility, too).

    But how they don’t die of shame, basically asking for stuff, stuff for *them*, like a Macbook! I will never the woos. Never. They are all the worst.

    • donkey schoen says:

      Agree so much about this. These people don’t have an ounce of humility to ever think about donating to a charity or his kids.
      Vile. Truly.

    • grammarian says:

      also poor taste

    • Never the Bride says:

      I actually would not respect a registry that involved buying things for his kids.

      • Gilly Blake, PowerpussyCEO Gilly (and the entire Cosmos) says:

        I would respect that a helluva lot more than asking folks to house them in California or give them 1+ hour plus massages. Jesus, the fucking gall.

        • Never the Bride says:

          I think wedding registries are fine per se, but if you’re just looking for cash, be honest and put up a gofundme or something. Or get a job.

          Recently was invited to a relative’s wedding. Adore the couple, they are in their early 30s, own their home, and each have career jobs with requisite salaries.

          Their wedding registry invited guests to pay for segments of their 3-week European honeymoon (which they could well afford). Things such as for “$275, you can send us to the opera in Vienna.”

          We went along with it, but I thought it was tasteless.

          (I am elderly and am shaking my cane right now.)

          Back in the day, I did register for wedding china (actually Villeroy & Boch porcelain, petite fleur). I think I’ve told this before (remember: elderly). We got two gravy boats. C’est ca. Also registered for Oneida stainless: received not a single place setting. Registry fail. 🙂

          My mom and sister did come through and buy us eight place settings of the porcelain in the end–there was an outlet at the time so they got them for a good price. I have picked up a few more over the years and also received soup bowls, ramekins, teapot, etc., for birthdays and Christmas.

          Actual wedding gifts were the classic things that people used to buy in those days. Silver-plated candlesticks, Mikasa wine glasses, picture frames, chip-and-dip, LOL.

    • Donkey of Oz says:

      Yes but lest we forget…… He is Swiss. They are neutral.

  19. Narcissistic Personality Disorder says:

    She really wants to have a baby. Unlike Nisha she is choosing not to take the “oops” pregnancy route, but Nisha’s chosen father was a better pick than Jena’s pick.

    • donkey schoen says:

      Agree – Nisha’s baby father is adorable and seems lovely.
      The groom? Yuck times infinity.

    • Fameless Shamewhore says:

      I understand wanting to get pregnant, I really, really do. But your future baby daddy is ALREADY a daddy. How about showing some interest in his kids first?

      It makes me so upset. Having an absent dad is hard. Having an absent dad who is absent for entirely selfish reasons, off doing his own “cool” thing, falling in love, getting high…that situation will fuck a kid up long-term. That is the kind of shit that takes a person years of therapy to work through.

      I am thoroughly disgusted by the two of them. When Jena was in Switzerland, sucking up to his family, she posted a series of pics of herself, Sacha and the kids. She never acknowledged their mother. Instead, she allowed people to post horribly inappropriate comments along the lines of, “They look just like you!” She intentionally bathed in the glow of being a pretend mom – to his *real* kids.

      OK, but then back in States, zero interest. Indeed, as per their wedding registry, “We’re planning to join our tribe in CA. Help create the dream with us and support our migration to the beautiful west coast.”

      So they’re planning to move considerably further away from his children. It will be even more expensive and difficult for him to spend time with them. How is that something he can reconcile with his conscience? And she with hers?

      I don’t know, of all the woos, maybe the one I had the most time for was Jena. Lazy, sure, but what the hell? She has the cash, the house, she likes to go dancing. Where’s the harm in that? But her behaviour since Sacha is truly reprehensible in my eyes.

      • Donkey of Oz says:

        Yeah, despite coming onto RBD and ranting about how shitty the burro is as a person on occasion, which is really just harmless venting at the worst sort of rich kid, she never allowed herself to get wrapped up with a guy who has kids. Even she understands how fucked up that would be for someone as unstable and incapable of empathy as herself to do. Jena must be either blind or a really bad person. She’s taken their dad away. Even Donald Trump spent time with his kids. It’s not cool. Jena, if you’re reading here, you’re enabling someone to abandon his own kids. Maybe you don’t care. But you will when they start calling you a fucking cunt.

  20. ShesJustStupid says:

    I’m confused about the latest Donkey photo from Costa Rica–did she marry Jess?

    • Hot Foot Lurch is Not My Guru says:

      I think this is some sisterhood thing where they all wear white in Costa Rica. That said, I do like Jess’ dress. Donkey’s not so much. Boring.

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