Donks Takes A Controversial Position That Pits Her Against The Entire World (Except The U.S.)


A potentially controversial post.

I don’t care about The World Cup. I mean, I really, really, really don’t care. I also don’t care about football. Or basketball. Or baseball. Or frisbee (actually, that sounds sort of “underdog” so it could be interesting.) Basically, I do not care about popular organized sports AT ALL.

I DO care about people. And I care about physical activity. I care about staying healthy and I care about loving your body. But professional sports bore me to tears. I don’t care about the competition, I don’t care about the players who are paid way too much, treated like Gods (WHY???) and have outsized egos to match.

I felt cut off from my own physicality for far too long because competition and traditional team based sports just didn’t resonate with my psyche. As it turns out, I love dance. I love ballet. I love jogging (short distances). I love yoga and hiking and beach walks and bike rides. I love hula hooping and headstands in the park.

The kinds of physical activities that we do when we DON’T want to compete are often (almost always?) seen as “less than” in this world of hyper competitive testosterone infused professional sports. Perhaps it’s a tribal thing, to cheer like rabid dogs for people we don’t know doing things we can’t do. But I think it’s sad that mainstream media and society in general feel that the only physical activities worth covering or worth cheering for are those in which SOMEONE WINS and SOMEONE ELSE LOSES.

That’s not the world I live in anymore, and it doesn’t have to be the world anyone else lives in either.

Just a thought.

Yes, just a thought to show what an evolved dipshit that she is and how she thinks she is better and smarter than everyone else.

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328 Responses to Donks Takes A Controversial Position That Pits Her Against The Entire World (Except The U.S.)

  1. CaptainGary says:

    What a brave Paradigm Shift! Take that, sports!

    • JFA says:

      Seriously. (eyeroll)

      She thinks this is really deep btw.

    • BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

      Love this comment!

    • Tingolayo says:

      Newsflash, Sher-donk Holmes: this is nothing new. My friends and I were like, “The football team sure walks on water! Huh. Let’s go smoke a clove” back before you were even born. Move on. BTW, you are totally, ridiculously mainstream, even though you think you’re a special snowflake. Yoga and kale are completely mainstream, esp. in California. Little old Chinese grannies are doing tai chi in the park, and wishing you would shut the fuck up.

    • Shamoolia says:

      Nothing is more obnoxious and assholey than someone loudly going on a five paragraph rant about something they “really, really, really” don’t care about. If you really, really, really didn’t care then STFU.

    • truther grammarian says:

      i’m not a sports fan and broke cities that can’t pay for schools and roads giving millions to profitable private businesses — sports teams — instead of letting them pay for their own office spaces/stadiums because of the promise of jobs, which outside of a few short term construction jobs and then long term soda/hot dog selling jobs doesn’t amount to much, and the parking nightmare dead zones around stadiums that destroy anything like an urban core and the rape culture of high school jocks and the travesty that teachers and other public servants are the targets of rightwing ire for earning actual salaries and wages but sports millionaires are celebrated … but none of this is news

  2. JFA says:

    Fuck you dipshit. I like the Yankees. AND I have a job. I win!!!!

  3. JFA says:

    Hey guys, did you know rabid dogs cheer?

    She mixes metaphors ALL THE DAMN TIME. Fuck, put down the thesaurus already. You sound like a moron.

    • JFA says:

      Also, if you never liked or watched sports, how do you not live in that world ANYMORE, seeing as to how you NEVER DID?

      Hi, I suck at sports! Therefore all sports suck! God, go read a book already or do yoga. Did I mention I’m a white girl? I hate her ass.

      • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

        Funny, too, in that she used to get SO defensive if you challenged one of the handful of cultural texts that she wuved. Ah, memories: “Let’s call Paris Hilton a sleazy tramp and watch Julia Baugher go rabid!”

    • killing me softly with her bray (noobie) says:

      HA! I was just about to ask that.

      Also, she did competitive sports for too long? Cheerleading?

      (disclaimer: I’m a former cheerleader and I do think it’s athletic but comparing it to the World Cup is quite another thing).

  4. JC says:

    Frisbee sounds like underdog? What the ever-loving fuck is she talking about?

    • JFA says:

      I just…I don’t…it’s best not to question. It makes sense in her mind.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Hippies do it, so it must be okay. She’s probably also tolerant of hackysack and fire-spinning.

    • Dances with Hooves says:

      So in Julia’s world, Frisbee is okay… but Ultimate Frisbee must be bad since there are teams. There aren’t usually teams in golf but it must be bad because there is a winner and sponsorship… Is mini golf okay? Oh wait, mini golf has winners and losers also, so that must be barbaric. And sometimes your ball gets lost in the slimy water near the windmill and that kind of thing disappoints people, and disappointment is an evil entity which must be avoided at all costs. What about Monopoly? Some people go bankrupt and that might mean losing the game.. unless you’re Shantitown in which case it means winning. I’m so fucking confused lately. Is she mad because people win and lose, or because large groups of people root for opposing teams, or because the media doesn’t cover Frisbee matches or yoga in the park? (You actually WANT media coverage for your fucking hobbies? Will that validate you? Even though TV is evil and the world would be a better place without it?) Go do something and stop crying about nothing, Julia.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        Wanna really know why Julia Allison isn’t shitting all over frisbee? HINT: For the same reason she lurks around the base of Runyon Canyon …

        “Just played Frisbee in Central Park for two hours w Code Name TK. I sorta sucked, but I have to admit: it was actually really (!!) fun (??!)”

      • Handbag Stuffed With Softness says:

        Like like like.

      • Fauxto of Dorian Bray (In Reverse) says:

        What about frisbee golf?!? Mind.blown.

    • 11th Wang says:

      Pretty sure was a shout out to Code Name TK, who is serious about Ultimate Frisbee.

      • Reality Show Ditch Pig Floor Oinker Goddess says:

        OMG, too much wineeeeeeee.

        • 11th Wang says:

          Ha! I apparently did the same thing to Brayella up there who was actually FIRST! Too much excitement.

          It’s so hilarious when she tries to poke the greatest loves from long ago, especially when they are no longer paying any attention because they do not give two shits.

    • Reality Show Ditch Pig Floor Oinker Goddess says:

      It’s b/c Codename TK was into competitive frisbee. “The doors always open!” Except that it’s closed.

  5. JC says:

    Oh yeah, and ballet. That’s an art form that totally encourages healthy body acceptance. What a fucking maroon.

    • JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

      She admitted that when she took ballet class her teacher gently suggested that she switch to modern dance when her raft ass started to develop.

      • Tingolayo says:

        Also, being born with short, bow legs will pretty much disqualify you from moving up in ballet

  6. Twitter Banned by Julie says:

    She really is out to lunch….
    I’m not a big sports fan, but it’s obvious why others are, and that they get tremendous satisfaction from the same tribal high Julie gets at transformational festie Fests.
    Wasn’t Julie begging for SF Giants tickets recently?

    • Twitter Banned by Julie says:

      Not a big sports fan, yet support the forever struggling Chicago Cubs.
      I guess Dadsers never took Julie to a Cubs game…. Bc the Boogers we soo busy having family discussions about Important Topics.

      Julie—-Forever a Boner Killer. #WorldCup

      • Duh, seriously? Grammarian says:

        being a cubs fan has very little to do with being a sports fan, and i say that as a cubs fan

      • Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

        Speaking of boners, she really has no idea how anything works. Even if you’re not personally into football/soccer and the likes, there is hardly a better time for hot, hot sex than big sporting events (just based on my relationship experience, don’t know about casual hook-ups, but that’s probably also a distinct possibility). If his team wins, he’s euphoric and there will be some enthusiastic fucking later. If they lose, less euphoria, but nonetheless a lot of sex later, so either watch the game with your guy or get together later and it should be worth your while.

        • Helena (Literally Fun In A Donkey HAHAHA Way) says:

          I testify to the pure truthiness of this comment.

  7. The Artist Formerly Known as Random Snowflake™ says:

    Julia hates all organized team sports, yet…

    She did attend a Clippers game in 2012,

    and a Giants game with Randi Facebook in 2011,

    she also anxiously anticipated “decimating” Greasy in tennis (demonstrating to him how for her to win, he must lose)..

    She also enjoyed a nice Bulls playoff game in 2011,

    She was about to lose her mind rooting for the Bears here,

    In 2010 she lamented not being able to go to a Giants game,

    She wanted to see another Cubs game in 2010,

    2009 she watched a Cubs game,

    She attended a Rangers hockey game in 2009,

    • Y tu, cupcake? says:

      Delurking because NO.


      Why can’t she just like what she likes and let other people enjoy what they enjoy.

      Competitive team sports taught me discipline, teamwork, camaraderie and how to handle defeat with grace. These are things she could SERIOUSLY benefit form learning.

      For some reason this one pissed me off big time. She’s THE WORST.

      • Monday, blowing the crack rocks says:

        THANK YOU. There can be immense value in team sports, and playing them was incredibly beneficial to my self-esteem as a teenager. They taught me sisterhood, how to be a good loser, and that limits are non-existent if you practice hard enough and convert your weaknesses into strengths. Sports dramatically changed how I look at my body — a powerful, strong machine, not something to lure men or compare to other women.

        But that’s cool, dumb cunt will continue failing & flailing dancing through life with the grace of a buffoon.

        • PassThePopcornPlease says:

          Thank you for reminding me that I played field hockey in Jr. H.S. and it helped me become more comfortable with my body.

    • Y tu, cupcake? says:

      Didn’t mean to post that here, but I will say…

      Thank you cupcake for those links. Greg’s work. Oh the hypocrisy.

    • Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

      Don’t forget the Cutler “canoodling” – she would have instantly morphed into Sportszilla, had that alleged fling led to anything.

      • AFF says:

        Big loss for Jay. He now has two (2) young kids with a different “reality star”.

        • Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

          I’m sure he’d be hurt if could remember who she is…

        • Albie Quirky says:

          She’s an antivax loon, too. Poor kids.

          • 11th Wang says:

            Question: How do the anti vaxxers expect to send their kids to college. Or abroad. Or anywhere where vaccinations are a pre-requisite. Do they ever address this reality?

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      Julia Allison (sooooo! brave! according to both Smellsberg & Davidiot) has, out of fear, kept that same boring-ass bobby-pin-mulleted head of skanky plastic pelts simply because she erroneously thinks that men like long hair only … & the same reason she ever faked any interest in any sport ever is because “Yoohoo, wallets! Over here!”

      Yeah, this one’s as controversial as a pile of clipped toenails. *yawn*

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Don’t forget her constant bragging about being an OMG! cheer-dancer at OMG! Georgetown.

      • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

        Which was more about fauxto ops than actually cheering on someone other than herself.

    • Shamoolia says:

      Didn’t she also go to Miami one year and many, many noses ago, to hang around hotel pools during the Super Bowl?

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        Yep. Claims somewhere to have met Milo there & that they then started dating, but I thought she stalked him there & he dumped her there.

  8. Twitter Banned by Julie says:

    Julie, infuriatingly provincial All. The. Time.

  9. JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

    Tranbraytion: Why doesn’t anyone want to fork over big bucks to see me doing yoga in the park?

    I’m not the biggest sports fan in the world (although everything goes on hold during The Olympics) but I can recognize that it is a communal activity where people who support a team can join together to watch people more athletically gifted than the rest of us do AMAZING shit. People bond over them, hell some people even get MARRIED to folks they meet because they both support the same team. Those “overpaid” athletes often put a hell of a lot of WORK into becoming who they are and they aren’t all arrogant assholes, plenty of them do a lot of charity work and give back more than Donks ever could or would.

  10. wtf says:

    No one cares about her opinion the Wolrd Cup. Don’t like it, don’t watch it

  11. Monday, blowing the crack rocks says:

    I’m surprised she didn’t take this opportunity to remind us that she doesn’t own a TV.

    How cool is she for hating on something that requires discipline, practice, teamwork and servitude? She’s fucking awesome!

  12. Hemmingway, Wolf and Bleeker says:


    “My new off-the-grid hippie earth-loving persona requires I despise mainstream events, and what could be more mainstream that the biggest sporting event on the planet, the World Cup?
    Because my cuntosity knows no bounds, I will make my displeasure known in a really obnoxious way and I will also take a swipe at all forms of competitive sports.
    I will also pretend I love ballet and yoga and that I am very good at it.
    Just to make it clear, it should be obvious to my audience that I am MUCH BETTER than sports fans of all nationalities. “

  13. Dances with Hooves says:

    So controversial that no one could be fucking bothered replying.

    • Dances with Hooves says:

      whoops someone literally replied the second I posted.

    • Dyspeptic says:

      There’s nothing sadder than Julia’s attempts to post something that will go viral. Still getting over the utter and confounding lameness of the inspirational poster she “designed” a few weeks back.

      “We hear what we want to hear…invisible ellipsis…between the words we want disappeared.”

      Yeah, that’ll do it. Keep throwing those strands of limp spaghetti against the wall, babe. In an alternate universe, one of them might stick.

      • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

        20 hours later and five fucking responses. “This might be controversial … ” SORRY, DONKEY! I took a stupid Buzzquiz last night, “Which Orange is the New Black Character Are You?,” posted my result and got 50+ comments. I’m thuper thpecial!

  14. Miss Mix a Lot says:

    A portion of a comment on that post. Sigh. Girls can’t bond over sports, I guess.

    “The athletes can be a very positive role model for kids, who can then watch and be inspired by people who play the same games they love with professionalism, determination, and class. It’s pretty clear from watching the games which athletes have good sportsmanship, and which do not. Also, enjoying a common team is a fun way for boys to bond with their fathers…”

    • Dances with Hooves says:

      yeah was hoping he was going to say something good but then that came out. dumbass.

      • The Artist Formerly Known as Random Snowflake™ says:

        Sports (much like math*) is hard for all the girls.


    • Y tu, cupcake? says:

      So close. Yet so sexist.

    • iblow4shoes says:

      My wife is still pissed that her father only took her to Yankee games if her brother couldn’t go.

  15. ShesJustStupid says:

    I wonder what Avacado thinks of team sports?

    And isn’t some of what goes on at Camp Grounded competitive team stuff?

    I love sports and totally psyched about the World Cup. She’s just pissed that so many people–and probably many she calls friends–are going to be diverted by this for a month.

  16. Miss Mix a Lot says:

    Maybe she’s trying to tap into some of the criticism that could be made of sports culture (I live in a city that prioritizes their teams over, say, infrastructure) but she’s doing it in this roundabout hippie way to include her new lifestyle. I’m going to go with that. I still couldn’t get through this huuuuuge Facebook status.

    • like a basilisk, but with lies says:

      There are plenty of valid criticisms of sports culture. The misogyny and racism it tolerates, the fucked-up labor situations, the weird economic relationships between teams and their cities…

      …but those aren’t criticisms of sports, which is what she’s taking aim at. I seriously just think this is an issue of her total lack of distress tolerance skills making her think that losing is some huge fucking catastrophe that should be outlawed (like sugar). I compete in an individual sport, and training for it is one big exercise in overcoming frustration and fear of failure. These are things that would be really, really helpful in the life of one Julia Allison.

  17. BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot says:

    I’m sure the Alpha Unicorn (Ali) insisted Julia post something to throw the hatred back onto her brawny backside. This post is lame even by Julia standards.

  18. sfish says:

    To be fair, I have said all but the last two paragraphs to dozens of people this week and they all react like I’m killing their baby. I don’t care about or enjoy watching ANY organized sport, and given that I live in America, I know that the VAST majority of the people I’m talking to don’t give a shit about soccer in the 3+ years in between every World Cup. So I don’t get why they get so pissy that I refuse to go along with their sudden and totally superficial interest. Rah rah competitions and national pride and international community, sure, but we literally JUST had an Olympics so I am full up on that. I’ll plan to enjoy the emptiness of my local wine bars while everyone else crowds together to watch TV at an uncomfortable angle and cheer like their lives depended on it for whatever team is from the country where they studied abroad in college for four months.

  19. Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

    OT: Can I interest you in the bloody irony that is life sometimes?

    So, as you know, I’ve forced the sorry tale of my kicking my self-involved guy to the curb instead of moving to Brazil with him and embark on project “‘love’ and (abusive) marriage” on to you many times. I wasn’t so much bummed out about not spending the rest of my life with him, but the idea of not getting to live in that lovely, if crazy and unpredictable, place after all stung quite a bit.

    What do I find in my inbox today? An advertisement for the perfect job in that very city, which would allow me to survive there on my own terms were I (very unlikely) to survive the selection process. Now guess who works at that university too…
    I’m still going to apply because I would like to be there, just not with him, but it has come up at a very peculiar moment.

    Oh well, carry on.

    • Dark Nights of the Donk (Intermittent) says:

      I shall cross my paws for you. I hope you make it and go and have a fabulous time that does not include that loser except for the very occasional “Whoops, haha, I forgot you also worked here!” meetings while on your way to something much more exciting.

      • Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

        Oh, I’ll go if they’ll have me. It’s just so weird that this didn’t come up six months ago because that probably would have swayed me towards deciding to risk it. So it clearly is for the better, but I still could not help but think “You’ve got to be kidding me!!!” when I saw it.

    • Helena (Literally Fun In A Donkey HAHAHA Way) says:

      Oh wow, I had no idea, Pearskank. Best of luck to you.

    • Tantric Soul Rape says:

      Best of luck, pear. Keep your head on a swivel if you wind up down there. Sister in law is from Brazil and ‘only got kidnapped once’. But she’s also something of an idiot, so there’s that, too.

      • Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

        Oh, these things are really random there. So far I’ve watched someone being car jacked who was stupid enough to scream and lucky enough not to get shot, but overall, you never really know whether you might be next. Sadly.
        But I’m used to that from parts of South Africa, so that’s not really my personal fear factor. If you manage to stay mostly clear of the materialist upper-middle-class assholes who should know better because they had access to the best education, Brazil’s a pretty great, if deeply flawed, place.

    • HippieLawyerGrifter says:

      Oof, I’m sorry to hear that, Pearskank. I know how tough dealing with the aftermath and repercussions of that relationship must be. Mr. HLG and I recently decided to move to the states from Brazil, and as someone who has both gone through/passed grad school concurso down there for a federal university (although I didn’t end up doing the program, but that’s another story) and who has several academic friends who went through the concurso process for tenure at various federais (UF Minas, Paraíba, Santa Catarina), let me tell you that if you get all your paperwork correct, you’re already miles ahead of 90% of the other candidates. The paperwork = easy points. Man, have I heard some stories about that, too; in [what would have been] my department, the candidate that the selection committee wanted to hire (went to OMG Harvard, was brilliant in the interview, got the highest written test score) missed out on tenure solely because he got penalized for paperwork.

      There is always a way to make Brazil work if you keep looking, though sometimes it can take a long time and be incredibly frustrating. Best of luck with it, and I think I’ve said this before, but if you ever want to talk about Brazil, Brazilians, saudades, or whatever–or bitch about having to get all those consularizações for your diploma and transcript–email me anytime at

  20. Dances with Hooves says:

    “But I think it’s sad that mainstream media and society in general feel that the only physical activities worth covering or worth cheering for are those in which SOMEONE WINS and SOMEONE ELSE LOSES.”

    Soo…? Should the media be covering you twirling around in tutus in your apartment, or posing for yoga photo shoots?

    Also, I thought she didn’t watch or own a TV so why all the bitching about media coverage… did she peep into someone’s window and glimpse a soccer ball and feel compelled to write this gripping piece? Or is she being forced against her will to read sports coverage on the internet with her eyelids taped open? Or did she see something about the world cup in a newspaper and rather than turn the page, she had to run to FB and start a “controversy”?

    • Monday, blowing the crack rocks says:

      No more election coverage! It’s bad for our collective psyche. No more CFDA awards, Tony’s, Academy Awards, etc.

      • Y tu, cupcake? says:

        I was just going to say…

        What the fuck. Our whole society is about people winning and losing. At least organized sports are honest and (marginally) fair about it.

    • Wolf, Hemmingway and Bleeker says:


      Actually, Donkerina, soccer matches can be tied.

    • Appropriation Station says:

      Ha ha there’s no way she reads the newspaper.

    • The Artist Formerly Known as Random Snowflake™ says:

      Donk probably wouldn’t be a fan of Larry Ellison’s motto, “It’s not enough that I succeed, everyone else must fail.” 😀

      • bitchface says:

        does she want olympic medals for “participant”???

        • The Artist Formerly Known as Random Snowflake™ says:

          I think so.. Just like we’d get when we’d tie dye t-shirts and have field day back in grade school. 🙂

  21. Cowboys & Brayliens says:

    Fuck off, you fucking cunt, I’ve never wanted Croatia to win something more than I’ve wanted them to win their match today and blow up the entire fucking country.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      That would be amazing.

    • Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

      Aw, really? I mean, I know where you’re coming from, but I guess I just have this massive soft spot for Brazilians who, regardless how much they complain about their government (and rightly so), still love the game and want the tournament to go well now that the rest of the world has arrived. But rationally, I more or less agree, I guess.

    • Donkey is running scared. says:

      Croatia? Hahahha ha!!!!! Beating…. Brazil???? Hahahhahahahhahahhahahjajhahahahhahhahhahahhaahhahahahhahaha!!!! No! Wait – hahahahhabahhababnHajnahajNgsdkdjk has!!!!!!

      • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

        May I join you? HAHAHAHAHAHHA, and Brazil, 3-1.

        • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

          That penalty!! What? Oh dear, I’m a little wasted.

          “Siri, I’m feeling drunk.”

          “Shall I call you a cab?”

        • Cowboys & Brayliens says:

          Yeah, after twenty minutes I turned it off, when CRO was still up. I knew they were going to lose, the only question was how badly. Brazil is just overwhelming.

          • Manifest Dustiny (OMGPearskank) says:

            The referees helped a lot this time. And I say that as a Brazil-loving gringa.

      • Donkey is running scared. says:

        I felt dick/ish after posting and listen cat ladies – I am no fan of brazil – but Croatia are like nazi weirdos. However that referee made a horrible call and I am so for the truth by the end I actually wanted croatia to win –

        The weirdest part of the World Cup for me is that the jungian collective (theoretically our telepathic super conscious) can be felt so readily – call me a hippie but it’s mysticism I have seen first hand.

    • Fauxto of Dorian Bray (In Reverse) says:

      Fellow Croat? Huzzah!

  22. social shysters says:

    “I DO care about people.” LULZ, okay.

  23. Fell off the Rainbow Raft says:

    Sorry but I LOVE pickup football games in the park with friends. And soccer. And watching the Os at the ballpark.

  24. delurking for a hot minute says:

    Y’all. She lives in the Marina (bro central of SF). SF is full of work-from-home, flexible schedule, self-employed types who can afford the time/money to be a World Cup superfan and day drink at the bars all week. It’s a hella international city and soccer/futbol is a big effing deal.

    She’s probably feeling left out that she’s not invited to any World Cup parties. This is like her Georgetown reunion sniping all over again. It’s her 33-year-old way of saying, “Oh yeah? Well, I didn’t want to go to your birthday party ANYWAY!”

    • I’m intrigued by your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter. says:

      She could get together with Michael Savage there then.

    • dirty grifter festivals by the bray says:

      Marina bitch checking in.
      She’s all mad because she doesn’t have any friends to do ANYTHING with. The real kind, not crowd sourced grifty cannibalistic woo woo self serving ass hats. If she had a real friend she’d be told to stop being a tacky embarrassing asshole doing yoga in a bra at a tourist destination when its 55 degrees out.

  25. JFA says:

    Julia Allison, mentions Georgetown once a day, hates your competitive, status obsessed culture.

    • JFA says:

      There’s nothing like a failure at life giving up and pretending it was on purpose.

    • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

      Remember her first website back in ’04? Where she practically mentioned the net worth of her “friends” parents? Put a fucking cork in it, Donkey!

    • Albie Quirky says:

      She was on the synchronized swimming team in high school.

      And also on the debate team, as she used to never stop reminding people.

      I guess she just didn’t care about winning then?

  26. The Manta says:

    And to prove how much she hate soccer here she is interviewing one of the greatest footballers ever.

    Click this link and be prepared to commit puppycide

    • The Manta says:

      I should point out at this time Thierry was earning 7m euros a year at Barcelona, excluding his various megadeal endorsements (Renault,Nike,Gillette you know the big players like Coobie). Somehow I think if she had known that she would’ve been reminding him of her past with Harold Ford.

    • Tingolayo says:

      Oh dear lord, that is painful. So uncool of her to stop him by putting her hand on his shoulder. She’s trying to flirt and he’s like, get me away from this idiot in a head bandage.

    • I’m intrigued by your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter. says:

      “finally. why do you call football, football? when u throw the ball!”

    • PassThePopcornPlease says:

      *Winces* Sorry, I’m not a soccer fan, but that was still embarassing to watch her ask such dumb questions. Liked how mustache guy ran the intercept at the end.

    • Helena (Literally Fun In A Donkey HAHAHA Way) says:

      I’m so glad someone other than me remembers this. It’s one of the very few Donkey videos that I have ever seen (I kant watch Donkey because it gives me twitch in All The Eyes), and it never fails to kill me.

      “Are you a soccer star?” Unbelievable.

      I’m actually not a big fan either (although I’m European, so, yeah, the game is unavoidably a Big Deal…. on the other hand and BTW, I am really surprised that the World Cup is big enough in the US for Donkey to become all “controversial” about it and for many of our esteemed catladies to have opinions about it; I just kind of assumed that basically no one in the US except school kids cared about “soccer” at all), but even I know that this little incident was genuinely, literally like asking Madonna, “are you a singer?” “Are you a politician, Barack?” “Have you ever written a book, Philip Roth?” “Do you happen to have any interest in nuclear fusion, Herr Oppenheimer?”

      • Albie Quirky says:

        It’s huge here in Boston, especially among people who’ve moved here from Brazil (as you might imagine), but with international students, and with emigres in general. Maybe her brother was talking about it and she just had to act all superior on the social media?

    • Fauxto of Dorian Bray (In Reverse) says:

      Christ, what an asshole.

  27. Nickelodeon Chic says:

    Good ol’ college ball. Never forget.

  28. All the Bralettes says:

    If A Donkey was fucking a soccer fan, she’d be blowing up Facebook with shitty photoshopped pictures of her wearing a futbol jersey and thinking back fondly to her days on the wilmette girls soccer team. Or crowd sourcing ways to combine ny fashion week with the World Cup. Christ but she’s absolutely sans personalité.

  29. donkton blabby says:

    Oh lil Donkles. What a ding-dong. If she really cared about ALL THE GIRLS instead of JUST THE GIRL NAMED JULIA she would recognize what a positive impact team sports have developing confidence, leadership skills and camaraderie.

    The thing I find so fascinating about this science experiment called Julia Allison is that it is impossible for her to share something she likes without putting people down the people who differ/disagree with her. She consistently does it ALL THE TIME. “I love this thing! I do this thing! It works for me! THIS IS HOW THE WHOLE WORLD SHOULD WORK! And if you disagree, you’re an idiot.”

    I find this most comical because she so desperately wants to be someone people can relate to. She thinks she writes stuff that’s empathetic and connected, but it just isolates her farther into lil stall of narcissism. I truly can’t fucking wait to read her book. It’s going to be hysterical.

  30. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    Anyone recall Julia Allison’s opinion piece tweet about the outcome of a (baseball?) game, when she obvs plagiarized the opinion of someone actually in the know, because she was obvs trying to impress some sports-loving wallet? Or when she made a big fkn deal about watching the super bowl w/ her parents (& got caught out in yet another lie as to the whereabouts of said watch party)?

  31. Dusty Adorned Documentary Series says:

    (Kinda re-posting from the last thread)

    This post just yells to me that she pitched yoga journal something confusing about how bea-yoo-tee-full she looks doing yoga in OMG San Francisco her true home + Coobie bras ballet festival happiness, and is outraged that they ignored her. She expected to be on the cover. She gets jealous when anything that isn’t her gets attention. And she constantly makes stabs at turning her minor personal nonsense into movements about society and All The Girls, except not at all.

  32. donkton blabby says:

    Has this already been discussed? She drops “book deal” in the first 30 seconds.

  33. RollsRoyceRevenge says:

    Team sports fill me with an inhuman urge to kill. You know what? NO1CURR.

    I simply avoid bars with television sets in them and conversations with straight men and my life is perfect.

    Actually even if I didn’t hate team sports I’d probably avoid those things.

    • Wolf, Hemmingway and Bleeker says:

      Oh, you are being an adult about it, instead of a whiny baby.

      In general, unless you are in the British Isles, I think it is better to avoid venues where people get drunk on beer (whether they are sports bars or not).

  34. Shamoolia says:

    “I love jogging (short distances)”

    Lazy Donkey can’t even run a 5K, therefore Lazy Donkey hates all forms of physical activity that don’t involve her looking at herself in a mirror.

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      “while wearing track suits (bright).”

    • The Artist Formerly Known as Random Snowflake™ says:

      Julia considers jumping up and down on a tiny trampoline “exercise”..

    • Dances with Hooves says:

      I knew she was not a runner when I saw the pic of her “running” in the Coobie bra. Even if you are small chested, you need a supportive bra for jogging/running, unless you enjoy being constantly uncomfortable and distracted and like the idea of saggy boobs. No one could wear that bralette if they’re serious about running longer than 30 seconds to the fridge, sorry Julia Allison 30 Day Coobie Challenge CoobieLUV

    • Y tu, cupcake? says:

      I LOLed at that one.

      Jogging (short distances). Like, what? What a weirdo.

      • Dusty Adorned Documentary Series says:

        Wearing the Coobie bras she bought in all the colors (bright).

      • Who donyou think you are? says:

        She jogs long enough to get her picture taken. See: Coobie “ad”, Wyoming Moron wedding.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          OMG the animation of the donkey jog is one of the funniest things I have ever seen. I am too hapless to find it myself, of course.

  35. Let It Explode says:


    I am terrible at sports, therefore they are meaningless.

    • Let It Explode says:


      Jay Cutler rejected my advances.

    • JFA says:

      Fuck you! She only hated sports because something about her PSYCHE! She never TRIED, she could have been GOOD! just look how good she is at BALLET!

  36. actually a W2 employee Winter McStravick says:

    donk has little feedback think is ultra cray lawyer has actual commenters, a collection of phellow grifters and lost souls.

    Money Intuition interview with bankrupt from las vegas norstums energy being

    “no one can pay you what you are worth.”

    how to exploit people with bat of an eyelash, don’t pay people a legal minimum hourly wage, “co-create”

    ding ding ding
    totally cray people

  37. Donkey is running scared. says:

    Is it me or is she really really really a big fat loser who says weird things I used I say when I was a scrawny 15 year old?

  38. JFA says:

    “Have I mentioned how much I like yoga?”

    seriously if she likes yoga so much I have a novel idea, maybe train to be a yoga instructor? Before anyone jumps me about it, yeah Im’ sure it’s hard and yeah I’m sure she’d probably fail etc. but christ. She seems to finally like something that isn’t sparkles, or pink, or something she probably really sucks at. Go fucking do it then, as a career! If you think you’ve found the meaning to fucking life.

    Or you know, continue to be unemployed and send Dadsers your rent check. Either/or.

    • Shamoolia says:

      She likes yoga because she is forever stuck in the year 2001 and thinks yoga is some trendy new fitness thing that sounds cool to talk about, when literally my grandma was taking yoga at the rec center like seven years ago.

      I am guessing she likes yoga because it’s easy* and she can do a headstand and thinks that’s impressive.

      * I know advanced yoga poses can be difficult and take lots of practice but who are we fucking kidding here? We all know Julia’s taking intro to yoga classes and applauding herself for doing tree pose for longer than ten seconds. She’s basically going to a relaxing stretch class.

      • JFA says:

        I don’t know dude. I never got past basic shit and never did yoga long enough to progress a lot (it’s on my list etc.), but I really think doing yoga is one of the only things she does. And she’s definitely very flexible…I mean she has NO JOB. Christ if I had 7 days a week all day I could get good too.

        I’m just saying, if she’s so into something try to turn it into an actual job, fuck. DO SOMETHING. I’m grasping at straws but it’s like, when is she going to do something? When??? No man is going to bail her out! It’s time!!!!!!

        • JFA says:

          I mean her headstand looks fine there. She really has been doing yoga a while now. I mean a while for her = more than 3 days.

          Julia if you are reading this, why not think of doing something yoga related? You finally have an interest in something. Why can’t you get a job??? Why do I care even?

          • Shamoolia says:

            That headstand she’s doing is surprisingly easy because you’re creating a pretty large, stable base with your forearms. We used to do it in my old lady after work yoga class. And we were a bunch of old ladies.

            You’re right though – Julia has all the time in the world to master a new skill yet she somehow still sucks at everything.

          • JFA says:

            Haha old ladies. Somehow I doubt that is true in your case. 🙂

            I absolutely LOATHE competitive yoga classes and love the nonjudgmental ones…and I’ve been to basic classes that kicked my ass so, I think that makes me an old lady too. 🙂

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      Yog-URT, JFA.


      Dee. Lish. Us.

    • Wolf, Hemmingway and Bleeker says:

      For La Donka, doing yoga is just another vehicle to feeling superior.

      I pity those fools who can’t touch their toes in uncomfortable ways!

  39. Shamoolia says:

    “As it turns out, I love dance. I love ballet. [I LOVE TO WEAR TUTUS] I love jogging (short distances). [BECAUSE MY CARDIO FITNESS SUCKS] I love yoga and hiking and beach walks and bike rides. [NOT “BIKING” MIND YOU] I love hula hooping and headstands in the park. [BECAUSE I AM A TODDLER]”

    Basically, she loves anything that requires the least amount of physical exertion possible because she’s a lazy pig. You know who else loves beach walks and bike rides? Senior citizens. Actually, senior citizens could probably hike longer distances than her. She hates sports because she’s a lazy do nothing slug.

  40. Shamoolia says:

    And who even wants to look at disgusting, egotistical, insanely rich, testosterone fueled, competitive barbarians like this when you have a hottie like Avocado at home/couch/van:

    • Tingolayo says:

      Jesus H Christ. I think I just got married to Miiko Albornoz.

    • Joan Bray-ez says:

      Donks can’t land a professional sports player or even a hot sporty guy these days so therefore sports suck! Meanwhile, I’ve suddenly taken an interest in professional men’s soccer, thank you very much…

      • Bunsy says:

        I dated a soccer player (played in college)… and it was like having Michaelangelo’s David as a bf. Seriously gorge.

        • Joan Bray-ez says:

          Personally, testosterone infused David Beckham makes me cheer like a rabid dog.

          So black & white with her stereotypically negative portrayal of professional athletes. Of course there are a handful of notorious assholes, but being a professional athlete takes the kind of discipline and dedication that Miss 30-Hour Coobie Challenge could not possibly fathom. Any many of them generously give back to the communities that support them.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      This is just completely delightful!

    • Aggressively Stupid says:

      Excuse me? Tim Howard wasn’t chosen for Shaven Heads, Beards or Tattoos? That’s a crime.

    • Lilly's 3rd Eye says:

      Wowza! I just realized I love soccer!

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      Not my type.

  41. SchadenfreudianSlip says:

    Serious question.
    Going back to the very beginning of chronicling the patheticness of this human turd (was it Baugher?), did the early community at that time just think she was a vile person or were people aware of the full extent of her sociopathy?

    I know when I started, I just thought she was an awful person worthy of constant mocking and ridicule. But its not that. She’s a fucking lunatic. Full blown, certifiable, case study in a text book, sociopath.

    Just wondering if/when this became abundantly clear to others and if it was understood early on.

    • Dusty Adorned Documentary Series says:

      Hmmm. By the time of the original Fauxga pose I knew she what she was.
      She made true nature clear to many MacBook Air/ He’s Bipolar! debacle.

      By the time she came to chat to say how oh she knows that post-bicoastal birthcray trip to Aspen looked sooooo perfect but actually all her friends were mad at her, I knew she was batshit crazy, because she was saying this to a group of people who had just written posts about how obvious it was that she was trying to project an image and the truth was leaking out of every annoying photo. And yet she tells us as though we are admirers and this is a big (so honest!) reveal.

      I’m going down a rabbit hole here. In summary, around Jakob and Julia, Relationship TMI I thought she was annoying, harmless, attention whore. By the time of the groundbreaking web series “TMI” I thought she was a sociopath. Since then she has managed to surprise me a number of times, as she ratchets up the crazy.

    • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

      Ten minutes after I had met her.

    • fig (young, fun, feminine philosopher) says:

      Julia used to fascinate for me because she did seem to have success without anything substantial to back that up. It was all “fake it till you make it” crazyness and strangely, it did seem to get her places. She was fascinating because she seemed to follow (to me, a confused East German) the “psychotic version of the American dream.” She was all PR and zero product.

      The fact that she does seem to have some personality issues (and honestly, the fact that I bonded with other catladies) kept me watching the show. It’s still super hard for me to predict her next move.

      My initial questions have been answered: she was very wrong about PR, social media and it’s power. Time proved her wrong. She is a nothing now, hard as she is stilly trying to make stuff happen.

      The only reason I keep watching this show is some weird, hidden believe that she somehow will make it big, just by accident. And I want to watch that and know exactly how it happened.

      I do hate how at this point we just snicker at random social media morsels she throws and reassure ourselves that we are indeed better off and just generally better than a failed social media girl with too much ambition and not enough brains to make any of them happen. Applying make up “incorrectly” or showing her nipples – who cares? I really don’t.

      • fig (young, fun, feminine philosopher) says:

        Excuse the typos and grammer mistakes, please. This is not Russian Girl!

  42. Handbag Stuffed With Softness says:

    I’m friends with some people here on Instagram, and thus some of you know there is nothing like a minor league baseball game on a summer evening. NOTHING.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      NOTHING. Lowell Spinners are my new love, but they will never replace the Portland (Maine) Seadogs in my heart. They have a little lighthouse that flashes and makes a foghorn sound when a Seadog hits a home run. Also, fried clams.

      • Handbag Stuffed With Softness says:

        We have a bull whose eyes turn red and he blows smoke out of his nose when there’s a home run. PLUS! if the batter actually hits the bull, he wins a free steak! Most home games are followed by the best fireworks display I’ve ever seen — and they do it night after night.

    • JFA says:

      I have many, many fond memories of going to yankees games with my entire family growing up, and eating our faces off. Baseball is actually the only sport I can really watch, besides tennis sometimes. Also, post-season BB is so much fun.I would totally go to see a minor league game if anyone invited me. Baseball is fun to watch and see in person especially.

      I mean I can’t stand football, but I don’t constantly rub it in everyone’s face. Because I’m not an asshole.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        Little League World Series is where it’s at.
        One of the best things ever about summer.

        • JFA says:

          aww, i hope to have kids (who am i kidding at this point i’d be lucky to have one) so i can make them play LL.

    • Jane (So Fucking Unrelatable) says:

      fuck yeah durham bulls (old stadium only)

  43. Certain Trees Remind Me of Eben says:

    Hello, long-time lurker here. But I have to pipe up about this.

    I understand that a lot of people don’t like sports. May even hate them. That’s fine. I am not one of those people, but I have a lot of friends who are. However, you don’t see any of them writing ridiculously long posts on Facebook about it. Like, bitch, who the fuck cares if you hate all sports?

    I almost feel like La Donk is trolling us with this post. Just like I think this nozzle of douche’s response is meant to troll… somebody.

    Max Marmer Ha I already PM’d Julia the spiral dynamics perspective to this topic a couple hours ago.

    But I will go all loquacious for you, Anima.

    Ask and ye shall receive.

    So here’s the meta human evolution of consciousness and values context perspective through the Integral Spiral Dynamic Lens.

    With this scaffolding we can dig deeper into the many of the more granular issues Julia calls forth, if desired.

    Roughly speaking:

    Mainstream america is at Orange (5) altitude consciousness, with edges around Blue (4) and Green (6).

    You could say:
    Blue separates people to saints and sinners
    Orange into winners and losers.
    Green into sensitive and insensitive people
    And only post-green do you get a focus on holistic health as Julia is championing.

    She’s right too, about it not being the world she lives in anymore. Each altitude level literally feels like a different world space.

    I want to live in a post-green integral world too, but we don’t do that by throwing out sports, that would be throwing out the baby with the bathwater.

    The transcend and include principle is very important to look at here.

    As we make the move to play bigger *non zero sum* societal games we need to transcend and include values at each level of conscious altitude : (Purple- Wonder/Awe, Red – Aggression, Blue – Discipline & Work Ethic, Orange – Competitive Spirit, Green – Sportsmanship / Equal Opportunity for athletes with any pigment of skin)

    But also the converse principle of Wilber’s transcend and include which is Hegel’s Negate and preserve. (i.e. these are things we need to get rid of) (Purple – magical thinking Red – uncontrolled violence Blue – authoritarian conformity Orange – self-centered egoity Green – unwillingness to recognize functional superiority)

    Finally, watching sports is a beautiful microcosm for Orange’s transferable life lessons channeled by some of the most powerfully expressed and horizontally integrated Orange humans alive today.

    Rick Reilly recently captured this well in last piece before retiring as a sports journalist subtitled “don’t ever let anyone tell you it’s ‘just’ sports” :…/_/id/11049946/rick-reilly-last-column

    What the ever loving fuck does that even mean?

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      WTF did I just read???
      No, don’t tell me …
      I’m better off not knowing.

    • Handbag Stuffed With Softness says:


    • Albie Quirky says:

      “I am high, I like sports, here is a loony hippie justification of that quoting Ken Wilber and other goofy New Age falafelsers.”

    • JFA says:

      Wait. What?

    • JFA says:

      Also to your original point, indeed, who cares what she thinks. indeed. The answer is, no one. Like literally none of the people. But at some point she got it stuck in her head that she was smart. She really believes this. not only that, she thinks she is VERY smart, iconoclastic even. Shifting paradigms with her mind.

      It can’t just be “I don’t like sports I don’t get it they are boring.” No it has to be an exegesis on some spiritual growth and how she has finally found the meaning of life and she knew all along where it was and it def was NOT IN SPORTS because if she doesn’t like sports it’s because they are not likable.

      Ponder for a second that she thinks any and all of what she wrote about is deep.

    • Aggressively Stupid says:

      I’m pretty sure that guy isn’t speaking real words.

    • Dusty Adorned Documentary Series says:

      Love your user name, Certain Trees, but I ask you with softness, are you okay?

    • Dusty Adorned Documentary Series says:

      Oh sorry! I thought YOU were writing that, Trees! Now I see it is of course a pasted comment from Facebook. For a moment I thought one of our own had turned deranged-woo.

      • Certain Trees Remind Me of Eben says:

        Oh good Greg, no! I would never surrender myself to the woo train, mostly because a cousin of mine has slowly gone into that world and I don’t like it. I mean, she hasn’t gone batshit like A Donkey, but I mostly just roll my eyes at the whole thing. I mean, it makes her happy, but yeah. Not for me.

        As for Mr. Marner, his comment is so wootiful, I’m not even sure if it’s real. I mean, it’s like a parody of hippie grifteratti-speak, so.. who the heck knows.

  44. Aggressively Stupid says:

    What the fuck ever, Donkey. I’m glad you don’t like the World Cup because usually A Donkey Ruins Everything.
    I love footy, World Cup and Ian Darke’s commentary. His pronunciation of “controversy” makes me happy.

  45. Helena (Literally Fun In A Donkey HAHAHA Way) says:

    I will say that the donkey with the ball in the picture is aggressively adorable and he knows it.

  46. Craying Mantis says:

    Doesn’t someone have to win and another lose in POLITICS too? (Kirk! McCain!)

    Doesn’t someone have to win and another lose to get into OMG BUSINESS SCHOOL!

    Doesn’t someone have to win a spot, and another lose a spot, to get into OMG GEORGETOWN THROUGH FAMILY CONNECTIONS!

    Doesn’t someone have to win a deal, and others lose a deal, to get an OMG BOOK CONTRACT? Oh, you don’t live in that world anymore? Will you not try to sell your book/win at book selling? I doubt it. Because your book proposal was all about how you are going to OMG GET PEOPLE TO BUY YOUR BOOK THE TIM FERRIS OR WHATEVER WAY (am too lazy to look it up and had never heard of him before reading here so insert correct name if that is not it).

  47. Meow Mix says:

    OT update about my job sitch, cat ladies! Remember my sexually harassing coworker and boss who did nothing??

    Well I quit! My former job has taken me back on in for $15k more than I was making when I left, as well as significant benefits, and put me in the management/corporate track.

    I’m working my last two weeks at my current shit job and I’ve heard through the grapevine that my boss has been shit-talking me/gossiping about me to many of our clients. 🙁

    • Tantric Soul Rape says:

      Mother fucker. Well, with any good fortune, that company will crash and burn and you can laugh from your sweet ass successful corner office.

      Can you just walk out? I lucked out because my company was afraid I would somehow poison the remaining employees and walked me out the day after I gave my 2 weeks. Then they got shut down a couple years later. It was a pretty toxic, cliquee, borderline illegal kind of work environment, so it felt pretty super to see the universe deliver justice.

      • Meow Mix says:

        Thanks for your support fellow cat ladies!

        I gave my two weeks, but I’m sick of the bullshit and want to walk out, but I don’t think I have the balls to. I found out that the client meeting I’ve felt obligated to stick around for next week is for the same clients who’ve been talking shit and gossiping about me to my boss.

        So next Monday I really want to be like, “I’ve finished all the work I need to finish, see ya later!” But I’m scared to. Don’t know why I’m scared, I don’t need the reference so whatever but I feel obligated to “do the right thing.”

        Also… the company is DEFINITELY gonna crash and burn. I’m so glad I got out now… my boss can’t even afford to pay my paycheck until this one check clears but I demanded it so who knows if I’ll even get paid for my last week!

        • PassthePopcornPlease says:

          Yeah, as tempting as it is to burn the house down, you want to leave well, because you never know if you’ll encounter these people again in the future.

          Take the high road, and as soon you leave the office, go celebrate. Living well is the best revenge.

        • Reality Show Ditch Pig Floor Oinker Goddess says:

          That said, I would leave some kind of written record of your boss’ inaction on your sexual harassment and say that’s why you are leaving. (I mean, imagine if you DID have to stay… and also imagine the next woman it’s going to happen to b/c it’s clearly tolerated there.)

          That is, unless any cat ladies with more experience say no. I just think it’s disgusting no one is truly getting written up for this.

          • Meow Mix says:

            I forwarded all the emails that went back and forth about the situation to my personal account and printed them out- the initial email he sent, me forwarding it to my boss, my response to him, my email to my boss outlining/detailing all the inappropriate conduct, and my boss’s response to that. I’m keeping it just in case.

            No one was written up. He was supposed to apologize to me, but never did. Now it’s like nothing happened. My boss was supposed to do an incident report (it’s a reallllly small company), but she never did.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            Your boss is a she ???

          • cupcake cray cray says:

            brayella, sometimes female bosses are even worse than male bosses in dealing with these situations. a lot of women don’t want to be seen as “that kind of woman” who “can’t take a joke” and is super-militant about being p.c. and blah blah blah, or, because they don’t feel offended by the particular situation, they feel another woman is too sensitive/hysterical for being offended by it. or a host of any other stupid things.

            I’ve said before that I’m an HR person. I once was informed a man in his 40s at a senior level was being really creepy with our young (early 20s) ladies in an office–among other things, he’d go up to them in their cubes and ask to see what shoes they were wearing that day, which was creepy but not blatant enough that the girls felt like they had reason to complain. once I started investigating him for sexual harassment and other policy violations, it turned out he was also regularly making sexual comments to a woman who was a director, in her 40s, and a serious ball-busting, take-no-bullshit kind of woman. she told me that she felt she was able to shut him down whenever he’d tried to go there, though she knew that he was also making comments to the much younger, more junior women in the office. I was incredulous, because, lady, you get paid really good money and you’re a fucking manager, so do you feel no sense of responsibility towards trying to help this office run well, and maybe if you said something we would have gotten rid of this creep sooner and it would have improved the employment experience for these younger women? she also was very vocal in general with how she felt it was a ‘boys club’ in the office, so I asked her why she hadn’t even just said something to HR at some point about his behavior. her response was “oh, I don’t want to rock the boat.” I couldn’t believe it.

            for as shitty as men can treat women in the workplace, sometimes it’s the women doing the most mistreatment. it’s disgusting.

            meow mix, I am glad you are getting out of there!

          • cupcake cray cray says:

            actually, I should clarify: clearly creepy shoes guy was doing the worst in the situation I mentioned, but the other woman’s complicity was terrible in a totally separate way. she had an avenue for recourse and was in a position where she did have the responsibility to report it, but she couldn’t be bothered.

        • Wolf, Hemmingway and Bleeker says:

          Don’t feel pressured to stick around if you don’t want to / need to.

          If a company wanted to lay you off, they would do it without blinking an eye, and usually with zero days notice so we workers are entitled to leave them when we feel like it, specially if you don’t need a reference from them.

          For what I hear, these people have NOT been nice to you, you don’t have to be nice to them.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      YAY! So glad you’re moving up & out. W/ the raise, & in light of your boss perpetuating an hostile work environment, can you cut loose sooner & vacay?

    • Dusty Adorned Documentary Series says:

      Congratulations, that is fantastic!

      Of course, it is unfortunate that you define success through work, jobs, etc.

    • PassThePopcornPlease says:

      That’s great to hear, Meow Mix, congratulations! I hope your that sexually harassing co-worker and your boss have something bad unfortunate happen to them.

    • Certain Trees Remind Me of Eben says:

      Awesome, Meow Mix! Let’s all meet at BM and burn together to celebrate!

    • Pissholes in the Snow says:

      Congratulations, Meow Mix! I’m sorry about your jerk of a boss, but at least two weeks from now that will be behind you. Yay!

    • The Inimitable Greg says:


    • Internationally Syndicated in the Telegraph of Calcutta says:

      Wonderful news Meow Mix! So glad this story has had a happy ending. Now, enjoy leaving early every day for the next two weeks, and doing the barest of bare minimums while you’re still at the old/sucky job. Good luck with the new one!

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Hurray! Living well is the best revenge.

    • Monday, blowing the crack rocks says:

      Glad to hear it, congrats and good luck

  48. Handbag Stuffed With Softness says:

    I just looked at Max Marmer’s FB page and he’s exactly like all the woos, but with other . . . issues. They all aspire to 4th rate minds and no one gets even there. And have you noticed that not one of them is funny? They don’t have a single sense of humor to share amongst themselves.

    p.s. Marmer blogs about mental health, so we can hope he’s at least able to see himself.

  49. AnnaPelt is Happy at 138 says:

    Actually, Julie, most of the world calls it “the beautiful game.”

  50. Ineffably Adverbial says:

    GUYS, Kelli Trent just laid down some TRUTHS on Donk’s anti-sports screed.

    “The only sports I don’t “like” are those that I do not have knowledge about. Your post sounds a little resentful and that your way is the enlightened or better way. I practice yoga and run. Peyton Manning is my idol, but so is Elon Musk. Just as writers, singers, CEOs, dancers, actors are celebrated for their talents & work ethic so are athletes. They have God given talents and work ethic that is beyond normal or natural. I suggest reading a biography of one of these “Gods” before you cast judgments. The vast majority of the world has a passion for sports that brings intense emotions, pride, and is beautiful and uniting. Before throwing stones or trying to be controversial, maybe put effort into researching &
    understanding why?”

    I just z-formation snapped. You know, as a sign of respect.

    • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

      I’d respect her even more if she didn’t spell her name with an i.

    • The Artist Formerly Known as Random Snowflake™ says:

      Word. Fuck Julia and her smug bullshit, she’s a worthless piece of shit. I’m not a big sports fan, but I don’t begrudge anyone else getting into it.

      You’re exactly 0% better than anyone else Julia.

  51. Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

    Bunnies – I have a wildly OT favor to ask:

    Do any of you know of/have a copy of Theresa Rebeck’s play “Walk” (as far as I can tell it only appears in one collection – Theresa Rebeck Volume III: The Complete Short Plays 1989-2005)?

    I desperately need to find out the character(s) names – by tomorrow morning. And it’s apparently the only thing no one’s ever put online (if only Shantitown was more interested in Theatre than her rhinestone…)

    • PassthePopcornPlease says:

      Jelly Roll, are you in NY? There’s a copy at the NYPL Mid-Manhattan on the 2nd floor.

      • Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

        I wish – unfortunately I am nowhere near a town/library/bookstore that has a copy

        • Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

          Had I had more time I could’ve at least Amazoned, but overnight isn’t going to be fast enough, and it’s not available on kindle/nook/ibooks either

        • PassthePopcornPlease says:

          I checked a few other libraries and their copies are out…maybe if you called Mid Manhattan tomorrow and asked nicely, a librarian might look it up for you>

          • Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

            It’s a thought (and might be my only option at this point). Thank you so much for checking!

          • Psycho-delic Ballerina fka Lurker says:

            Jelly Roll: I looked around and came up with nothing so far, but I did come across a few posts referring to the female lead as “The Woman” in caps. Is it possible the characters weren’t named? They were just “The Man” and “The Woman”? This likely does not help, but just FYI.

          • Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

            Thanks Lurker – it’s entirely possible. And it is helpful!

    • Internationally Syndicated in the Telegraph of Calcutta says:

      I can get it from my university library if you need it, but it’s in the depository, so if I were to request it this evening, it won’t come through before Monday, unfortunately. I’d be happy to request it and look up that particular play if you’d like (I checked our library catalogue and we have the Collected Plays, three volumes); do let me know here – given the caveat about it not coming before Monday at the earliest.

    • truther grammarian says:

      google books
      gutenberg project

      • PassThePopcornPlease says:

        truther, Google Books didn’t have a preview. It wouldn’t be on Gutenberg, because those are only books in the public domain (copyright expired, or never had it).

        • Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

          True on both counts – but good thinking.
          I swear to Greg, how this is the one thing unavailable on the web is just a mystery to me.

          But keep the ideas coming!

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      Online review here (I didn’t register to see; don’t know if it mentions character names in that particular play):

    • Tiny and cute grammarian says:

      Preview on amazon or bn?

      • Jelly Roll's Cried-Off Rhinestone says:

        Nope – neither has a preview – it’s crazy how “unfindable” this is

    • Freeloading Musketeers says:

      Jelly, do you still need this? My library seems to have it, and I can go up right now and check it if you need me to. It’s just one floor, so no big deal.

      • Freeloading Musketeers says:

        Actually, I take it back. We do not have volume 3, just 1 & 2. So sorry!

        • Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

          Aw, well CRAP! But thanks for the offer – damn libraries

          • Tingolayo says:

            Sorry, Jelly, I was going to try locally but I’m on Pacific time and I failed like A Donkey on a Cootie challenge.

    • Jelly Roll's Cried Off Rhinestone says:

      So… It was Lurker for the win (in that I’m still not certain, but I went with “The Woman”, and it went over fine)

      Thank you so much for the efforts Catladies! Seriously – Lurker, Popcorn, w2, Calcutta, Tingo, Grammarian, Brayella, Freeloading… Y’all are the best.

      (And thanks for letting me pull a Julie with the crowdsourcing – and the ellipses)

      Cheetos for all!
      – Jelly

  52. The Artist Formerly Known as Random Snowflake™ says:

    Unrelated to Donk.. (Sorry, Donk!)

    Just noticed our boy Matty made a couple of non-angry posts to his blog (the first I have seen where he didn’t wish someone a painful death).. I scanned them thoroughly, but could find narry a trace of vitriol. I cannot explain it either. The photos are pretty good though..

    Baby Barn Swallows..

    Flowers and stuff on the farm..

  53. Inconsequential Titties says:

    She. Is. So. Fucking. Dumb.

    Just a thought.

  54. Psycho-delic Ballerina fka Lurker says:

    Has this been discussed? DOnks is going to dance tomorrow night at another Avocado fest??

    Photo: Friday night! Come join me (and 600 other people) for a beautiful full moon performance by The Human Experience – David Block and others!
    LikeLike · Share
    10 people like this.

    Caeli La Yay!!!!! I hope you’ll be dancing too!
    Yesterday at 9:03pm · Like

    Julia Allison I think so Will you be in town!??!
    Yesterday at 9:03pm · Like

    Alexa Rae Caeli La ya will you?? Excited to see you both!
    Yesterday at 11:04pm · Like · 1

    Accompanying photo here:

  55. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    OT: Here’s a GURRRL FRIDAY job offer for Debbie Seltzer:
    (Pssstt, D0nk! THI$ is how you recruit legit help)

  56. Dances with Hooves says:

    And, like the typical bitchy brat that she is, she makes a point to NOT “Like” the post from the Kelli person, let alone take the time to answer her well-thought out reply. Her attempts at controversy are akin to tossing a limp-wristed stink bomb into a crowd at a petting zoo and then skipping off the to the snack bar, coming back to make sure a few people still like her, even though, oops, she did it again, teehee.

    I can understand, people post things on FB and don’t always have time to come back to argue their original point but the extent to which she does this is infuriating, and we know she doesn’t actually work, so. She is only posting this to get people to pat her on her head so she doesn’t feel like the lonely, miserable hose beast that she is. And why is she so pathetically incapable of having an opinion without coming off as a complete unlikeable bitch? I know, I am preaching to the choir again but it is just unbelievable. Does she realize she can “not like” sports, sugar, or tv without insulting the intelligence and intentions of people who indulge in such evils? The way she constantly bemoans the fact that if only the entire world did what she suggested, we would all be better off. Um, full of your fucking self much??! Imagine what the earth would be like if it were filled with Julias. I’m not thrilled about living on a space station but I would be lining up for a ticket and a space suit in a hot minute if it were an alternative.

    • JFA says:

      ALL OF THIS. Honestly, from what I’ve seen of her FB, she goes on, posts her crap bullshit spiels, and never engages with ANYONE who responds. I’ve said this before. What a self-centered piece of shit. How much do you wanna bet she never checks out anyone else’s wall except to stalk ex’s and the like? She has literally zero interest in anyone else’s opinions. Fucktard.

  57. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    PUKE. A friend has been grating my last nerve w/ “OMG Birthday Month!” FB posts (extremely stupid daily status updates along the lines of “DAY ONE: Today I treated myself to a frothy mocha mocha … YUM!” | “DAY TWO: Today I treat myself to XYZ dvd rental … I KNOW I WILL CRY!” | “DAY THREE: …” (by then, she was muted so that I didn’t see any more of that juvenile Julia Allison mentality bullshit. STFU, eh?)

    Just now, on local news station, I saw the silly twat waffle’s baby pic & maiden name — she literally submitted her own self to the Happy Birthday, Baby shout-out segment reserved for, you know, actual babies & toddlers. Oh … my … Greg …

    Can’t take it. Full-body shudder occurred, followed by an immediate unfriending.

    • cupcake cray cray says:

      that’s crazy. how old was the ‘baby’ turning?

    • dirty grifter festivals by the bray says:


    • Helena (Literally Fun In A Donkey HAHAHA Way) says:

      I thought Donkey was the only one who used the words “birthday month.” I probably thought she was the author of the demented concept. Should have known better…. not an original thought in that donkey gourd.

      It’s my birthday tomorrow, BTW. No1curr, and that’s the way it should be. SMH hard.

      • fig (young, fun, feminine philosopher) says:

        Happy Birthday!

        • Helena (Literally Fun In A Donkey HAHAHA Way) says:

          Heh, thanks, fig. Seriously though, everyone who was ever born has a birthday once a year, pretty much every year. I don’t see the big deal. I’m going to have a nice day tomorrow, but the weird desire to stretch it for a month kind of sounds like some people might want to get a life / pay some old bills.

          • fig (young, fun, feminine philosopher) says:

            Eh, I don’t care about birthdays that much, either. But I do love everything Czech and I really like you! 😉 And so I do as my friends do and consider it a proper occasion to celebrate anyway. So again, happy birthday!

            And even though my Grandpa was was one the German Czechs who had to leave, proper plum dumplings were my very favourite food growing up. And I did learn summer hiking and winter skiing there, and crying in a gallery and never passed muster trying to pronouce 3.

            Happy Birthday!

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        HBD 🙂

  58. To horrified to remain a lurker says:

    As someone who did ballet for many, many years – I fully support whomever said that it is one of the most competitive activities I can think of. There is certainly a camaraderie amongst dancers, but instructors compare you to your fellow dancers in every possible way. It is extremely cutthroat, just like any professional sport (sometimes more so). Every time this girl says she “loves ballet,” she should add a disclaimer: “*By ‘ballet,’ I mean I love taking photos of myself wearing pointe shoes and looking like a pretty, pretty princess!!”

    • Grifty Shades of Cried-off Rhinestones says:

      Oh, and you can bet big time that she is seething with jealousy over her new more accomplished dancer buddies. So much for not being competitive. She is such a fucking liar.

      • JFA says:

        But in her competition NO ONE LOSES!!!! Except those of us who have to watch her pretend to dance.

        She knows the truth and the truth is her version of athleticism and everyone else’s version is wrong.

      • medstitute says:

        as someone who takes ballet every day at one of the many wonderful studios here in NYC– delurking to say: as if! i find it very hard to believe that if she’s actually taking ballet class, we haven’t been treated to a fauxto of her at alonzo king lines dance center or something. at the very most she’s doing one of those “barre” workout class and pretending its the real thing.

        • dirty grifter festivals by the bray says:

          I take classes at Alonzo King, its such a cool facility and class prices are super reasonable. Maybe I’M a ballerina and I should go clomp around dusty white people festivals.


    • JuliasTooSmallTutu says:

      Julia couldn’t name a current ballet dancer if her life depended on it. She’s not a fan (or balletomane) and has never bought a ticket to see any dance performance that I know of. A few years ago she saw Alvin Ailey but that’s only because someone took her and then there’s the famous “guy bought me dresses, earrings and tickets to The Nutcracker” post and that begins and ends her love of ACTUAL ballet

      • Too horrified to remain a lurker says:

        Seriously – and SF Ballet is one of the best ballet companies in the country (if not the world)! While it’s great that she (and others) find enjoyment in expressive, joyful dancing, it is an insult to ballet dancers everywhere to call what she does “ballet.”

    • PassThePopcornPlease says:

      Speaking of competitive activities, I think’ll go watch “Center Stage” this weekend. Cheese and ballet, what can be bad?

      • Pelts, Glorious Pelts says:

        I am the best goddamn dancer in the American Ballet Academy. Who the hell are you? Nobody.

        • PassThePopcornPlease says:

          “Oh please…she’s a heartbeat away from tattooing your name on her ass.”

    • Certain Trees Remind Me of Eben says:
  59. JFA says:

    Hula hooping???

    Also, dickweed, some of us DO CARE about the players. For someone who spent how long going on tv talking about celebrities (but I know, you never cared right?) STFU about athletes. Derek Jeter, Bernie Williams, Andy Pettitte, fuck Mariano Rivera? Seriously fuck you, Mariano Rivera is a lovely human being from everything everyone says. The best relief pitcher who has ever lived…a true miracle story to come from nothing and become a revered sports figure. And not sure if you realize these people work their ass off.

    So pardon the shit out of me for “caring” about athletes I love. Athletes (not the horrible rapey ones, the ones who actually seem like good people), what they can’t be role models? I am not allowed to be batshit excited when a team I have always loved, and shared with generations of my fam, wins the goddamn world series? I am not supposed to care that a beloved Yankees icon is retiring (Jeter, tears)? Why don’t you shut up?

    People have interests besides “themselves” and sometimes that includes sports. Because apart from everything else, it’s FUCKING FUN TO WATCH AND PARTICIPATE IN. But you wouldn’t understand, because you’re only interest is YOU and YOU. You’re right, I should shit on my own memories of watching games with my family and friends and going to yankee stadium growing up. Because ZOMG ATHLETES ARE OVERPAID AND SOMEONE ALWAYS HAS TO LOSE.

    /end rant. God I hate her ass.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      I don’t think this guy is familiar to the majority of people, but he’s one of my faves — — all around good guy who gives back to his community, such a fun talent to watch perform, & he’s genuinely humble.

    • Tingolayo says:

      Please don’t be upset that my husband is retiring to spend more time with me.

      • JFA says:

        LOL. I claimed him first like, years ago. I honestly always had the biggest crush on Bernie. He just seemed like such a nice smart dude plus he played classical guitar. Miss you Bernie. Loved watching you run the bases.

        And I always thought Pettitte was super hot but I’ve heard he’s a super christian. I’m surprised no one has dissed the yankees yet.

        GAWD we are such LOSERS for caring about sports!

        • like a basilisk, but with lies says:

          Your guys are my guys too. <3

          I miiiight have right of first dibs on Bernie, though! His rookie year, I was in like fourth or fifth grade, and my dad and I used to go to games like once a week and sit in the bleachers (WAY before the bleachers were dried out). Anyway, sitting right behind Bernie fifteen times that year induced a lifelong love (I told my dad he was going to be good, my dad was not impressed, I still say I told him so). There's a great story, too, about a jaded veteran player (a pitcher, maybe? Can't remember the specifics) waking Bernie from a rain-delay nap and being amazed by how psyched he was to go back out and play. And he was so cute with his little daughters. Man, I miss that guy.

          Andy's got the best profile I've ever seen. What a beautiful, beautiful man. He is, in fact, super Christian, which was a great disappointment to me when I learned it, because I had thought/assumed/hoped he was Jewish. I watched his final game AND listened to the radio broadcast and cried both times.


  60. Grifty Shades of Bray says:

    Shantitown has posted an explanation of her bankruptcy on her Facebook page, blaming it on some guy she sold her business to.

    • PassThePopcornPlease says:

      “Many folks have wondered how I ended up in bankruptcy after building two million dollar businesses and how I was able to rebuild so quickly after the bankruptcy (I filed two years ago and today there are 4 businesses bringing my work out into the world bigger and better than ever before).

      I’m writing a book about the whole experience. I finally sat down to write about the very beginning of the financial crisis (that led to total financial liberation) and here’s that story:

      When I really consider the root of the debt that led me into bankruptcy, it starts as far back as 2008, when I sold my law practice.

      I had a million dollar a year law practice full of happy clients and a kick ass team. And, I made a major mistake by selling it to a man who had never run a million dollar law practice before. I seriously underestimated how important that one factor was.

      You see, it takes something far different to run a million dollar law practice than it does to run a $100,000 law practice. That something is not something that comes easily, it must be grown into. And Art, the guy I sold my practice to, didn’t have time to grow into it — it was thrust upon him in June of 2008, when we agreed he would buy me out of the practice over time, using the revenues from the firm to keep it going.

      I thought it was a sure deal. I had the marketing systems in place, hired him a marketing coordinator who was amazing, we had a great team to run the machine that served the clients, and, well, what else could he need?
      Within two months of taking over, he slashed and burned costs because what it really takes to run a million dollar business is a willingness to write checks for expenses in the neighborhood of $500,000 to $750,000.

      Art didn’t have back up capital and he wasn’t used to writing big checks, so he started cutting expenses. First, he cut the marketing coordinator. Then, the marketing costs.

      By the end of 2008, Art was out of money and the new client flow had all but slowed to a trickle. On December 31, 2008, Art called me into the office and said “Alexis, I’m out of money and I can’t continue to run the firm. You can either take it back or close it down. I’m out.”

      I couldn’t take it back because I had already moved on. There was no way I could put my energy back into seeing clients on a one to one basis or manage the day to day operations of the business.

      My second business, educating families and their lawyers about how to plan for their whole family wealth, had taken off. I had a best-selling book on the market. I was appearing on television all over the Country. And, I couldn’t go back.

      At the same time, I couldn’t just close it down. I had clients and team members who were counting on me. I had chosen Art to buy my practice because I believed he would treat them right. I was wrong and I couldn’t let them suffer the consequences.

      I’d have to eat it myself.

      So, I took back the firm and ran it out of my credit and savings for 6 months while I transitioned the clients to lawyers I had already trained on my systems throughout the Los Angeles area and I supported my team members to find new jobs.

      That was a $250,000 hit. And, it was the right thing to do.

      To make matters worse, that hit came directly on the heels of having made a $100,000 commitment (with $87,000 put on credit) to join Ali Brown’s Diamond Mastermind program. Had I known Art was going to give me back the firm, I never would have joined the Mastermind.

      So it’s really a great thing that events happened in the order they did. Joining that Mastermind was one of the best decisions I ever made. But, it was an investment I thought I would easily repay with Art’s payments to me. As we now know, those payments never came.

      And, that was just the beginning. By the time I filed bankruptcy, I would clear $500,000 of debt. Most of it used for very good purposes (yes, there were some frivolous purchases as well) and all of it being repaid back many times over as I use what I learned from each of those investments to participate in creating a world that works for everyone.
      Stay tuned for the rest of the story, including where the rest of the debt came from and how I was able to rebuild so quickly and easily. My books “Financial Liberation” and “You Are Not Your Credit Score” will be out next year. In the meantime, I’ll post snippets here.”

      • Jack Is Bankrupt & Lovin' It! says:

        This appears to be the first installment in 856 paradigm shifts, er, posts. By the time Shady Shanti has finished, we won’t be able to tell the players without a scorecard and will have NO idea what the fuck she’s talking about. Meanwhile, her fellow grifters are giving her raves, like WOW!, followed by Wow Wow Wow, followed by Oh and wow. Seriously. Except for Brian Kaldenberg, who I hope is doing irony:

        Is your book going to give post-bankruptcy tips? Like not paying your taxes and putting them on a payment plan? I can’t wait to be enlightened and empowered!

        • Grifty Shades of Cried-off Rhinestones says:

          Also, if this was the case, why did she freak out to Craigers in that recorded phone call that we’d exposed her?

      • Aggressively Stupid says:

        Having a business go under because of an unreliable business partner seems like a sound reason to file bankruptcy. So, why didn’t she say that from the get go?
        The fact that it took her this long to come out with this story (she hasn’t mentioned the failure of this former business anywhere that I have seen) makes me question everything about it.

        • Grifty Shades of Cried-off Rhinestones says:

          Not only that, but what kind of LOLyer would craft such an irresponsible sale that had such risks for the seller?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            Reading between the lines, I assume that Art was more of an investor-type silent partner who quit writing checks. Someone track him down …

          • Grifty Shades of Cried-off Rhinestones says:

            “Art didn’t have back up capital…”

            Wouldn’t this have been easy to figure out ahead of time?

      • Wolf, Hemmingway and Bleeker says:

        The idea that she did all this because she couldn’t let her clients and staff down is Laughable.

        She tried to revive her business out of self-interest (i.e. without her business turning a profit she wasn’t being paid for the sale) and failed. Period.

        • Grifty Shades of Cried-off Rhinestones says:

          This also doesn’t in any way explain the discrepancies between what she said she was earning and what she reported re: the BK.

          This is a big lie.

      • Pinky says:

        I would suspect that there are some folks who don’t feel as though “all of it being repaid back many times over” by Grifti Shanti’s paradigm-shifting repudiation of our current financial system. Her containers of hopes, dreams and soggy rhinestones sure aren’t going to pay anyone else’s bills.

  61. Fresh Nuggetz says:

    This makes me chuckle. And it makes me want to hear Art’s side of the story.

    Did she sell her practice to Art Vandelay?

  62. Curling Irons At Dawn says:

    Yeah, so…I don’t care about sports either. But I also am not going to pretend like that’s some all-important philosophical theory, either. I just go about my business and let people watch the World Cup without being all “Sports, explain them in three sentences” (that’s a callback for ya!)

  63. The Manta says:

    Did you see that ludicrous display last night?

  64. mcakez: Juicy. says:

    Has this bitch ever written anything about anyone other than herself?

    “I care about people.”

    Bitch please. Name one.

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