$3200 / 1800ft² – Awesome Roommate for STUNNING Furnished Dream Beach Home (Marina del Rey)
I’m looking for someone really amazing, considerate, intelligent and fun to live in my stunning, spacious, luxury two-bedroom home in Marina del Rey. Completely furnished with top of the line Rachel Ashwell Shabby Chic furniture and every amenity you could dream of (even the towels and sheets are gorgeous), you wouldn’t have to bring anything but your toothbrush. Your queen sized bed is brand new, and your closets are California-closetized.
I am very flexible on how long you would want to stay here, from two weeks to 6 months. This is BY FAR the most beautiful place I have ever lived, and trust me: it’s expensive but SO WORTH IT.
A bit about me: I am a 31-year-old tv and print journalist. I moved into this place, which is (frankly) way above my budget a year and a half ago, because I had a (cough) reality show on a certain rather infamous network. Not MTV.
I both work from AND travel quite a bit – so when I’m here, I’m really here, but when I’m gone, which is about one to two weeks a month, I’m really gone! My last two roommates, really amazing, awesome girls, BOTH fell in love while living here and left to move in with their boyfriends. So I’m renaming this place the Love Shack.
If you’re single and want to find your man, just move in here!
I’m in a very serious relationship with a man who is in the process of moving to SF, so I am also looking for someone who may want to take over the lease at some point … and perhaps with the furnishings still there (the entire place furnished is $6200 a month).
I’m open to either men or women, as long as you have great energy (positive, happy!) and are clean and respectful. (I’m somewhat of a neat freak … which means the house always looks great!!)
I am super healthy (usually vegan and gluten free) and although we have a brand new 47 inch flat screen with cable, etc, I don’t really watch … except The Bachelor! Okay. So I’m hooked. What can I say? We have sick surround sound speakers, and a roof deck with an ocean view that will take your breath away.
My favorite part of living here is riding my bike down the beach path, or walking my small shih-tzu along the sand, or running along the canal with her.
Speaking of which, yes, I have a small 10 lb dog. She is like no other dog you’ve ever met – she doesn’t bark or yap or whine. You will fall in love. If you are a dog lover and willing to watch her when I am gone, I am willing to adjust rent.
Additional: Deposit required, cleaners are $100 every two weeks and utilities are usually about $50 a month, but I would be willing to discuss including them.
MORE about the home:
- just 12 minutes from LAX and STEPS FROM THE BEACH at our STUNNING HOME in Marina Del Rey, right next to the Venice Pier (just .6 miles away – a quick stroll down the beach, or a 3 minute bike ride) and 10 minutes bike ride from Santa Monica. It is the most PERFECT place to watch a sunset, as the beach here is nearly private (most tourists stick to Santa Monica, so this is the Malibu of the South, I like to say.)
Only four years old, this gorgeous, light filled, two bedroom, two bathroom super luxury condo is over 1,800 square feet – steps from the sands of the Pacific. It has all stainless steel appliances, a gas fireplace, huge floor-to-ceiling windows that fill the place with natural sunlight.
I’ve decorated it with Rachel Ashwell Shabby Chic furniture for a modern, beachy, comfy chic. Everyone who stays here comments on how comfortable & cozy it is … I’m a homebody who loves just spending time in my own abode, so I really put a lot of love into the place.
Ride your bike (I have bikes I LOVE you can borrow, as long as you promise to return them and treat them well) down the ocean walk into Venice (five minutes away) and up on the bike path to Santa Monica. A yoga studio is just down the street, along with some of the best bars & restaurants Venice has to offer.
DETAILS ON THE HOME:
25-30 minutes from West Hollywood
25 minutes to downtown
10-15 minutes to LAX
Parking is free on the street or we can discuss the space in the garage!!The unit is on the 2nd floor of a gorgeous 3 story building equipped with Surround Sound, Whole-House Audio, Security System with multi cameras, Hi Speed WiFi., Central Vacuum, Dishwasher, Laundry room with washer & dryer, Hardwood floors, Marble slab kitchen & bathrooms with giant Jacuzzi MULTI-JET SPA tubs.
You’ll love cooking in our state of the art kitchen … and BRING YOUR SWIM SUIT (or your wetsuit and surfboard!) You’ll want it for the beach. We do have four boogie boards here available for your use.
Also please know that we do NOT permit parties, as our neighborhood is quiet and lovely, and we love living here. We’d like to keep it that way!
Thank you for looking and I look forward to meeting you soon!
Transbraytion: Miss Advised not picked up for Season 2.
Thank fucking God.
Not to JFA myself, but…I can’t wait for JFA to get ahold of this thread!
I give up.
“STUNNING”
CANAL NEXT TO DONKEY’S HOUSE:
At least she quite lying through her mis-matched chiclets & is no longer calling it her ‘beach-front home’.
+1 for “mis-matched chiclets”
Very super luxury, respect.
“My favorite part of living here is [...] running along the canal …”
#WaterSeeksItsOwnLevel #NastyOnBothC
ounts#EarthquakeFaultline
I love how her description goes from luxury to “super luxury” in the same post. Like, even as she’s writing it, the desperation is setting in.
When I think “super luxury,” I think of Donatella Versace’s custom bathroom, not a donkey stall with an old prom dress on the wall.
How can she possibly afford that place?
Agreed. $6,200 a month?
And what’s up with Devin being in the process of moving to San Francisco? Something smells fishy and it’s not just Donkey’s wide stance.
You rang!
Well, there are more jobs there (few though they are) for computer dudes than there are in LA.
And Nutty Granny Moneybag’s $$$ is running out as I type this!
At a burn rate of $6,200/month + utils + pointless travel + cleaning crew + car lease + insurance + gas + food + etc.. that shit is gonna be gone soon..
I’m betting it’s gone already, because Pettifogger and Aunt Vicky haven’t sold the house yet per Zillow.
Julie could easily have run through $50K since August or whenever, which would probably be a reasonable guesstimate of what her share might be.
@Albie: I noticed that, too. The Baughers are stacking up the real estate in just a couple of square miles. They haven’t even put it up for sale.
So are we thinking that the inevitable next trip back to the Chicago area Donk will be staying in a swanky hip pad on Elmwood Ave. in Wilmette? And will she be calling it “my house,” to?
O/T Albie but I want to thank you. Ordered The Strangest Man and gave it to my hubby for Xmas; he’s about 3/4 finished and LOVES it. Gracias.
Oh, yay! Paul Dirac fan club 4 lyfe!
Well, that is what she expects to get for the place furnished.
Greedy Donkey is probably paying a lot less than that.
She absolutely is paying less than that. Note the legalese: “… including furnishings is $6200.” So without the furniture the place is really $5500?
Also, how is it fair for someone to pay $3200 when she and her girlfriend Devin Stetler are two people splitting the other half of the rent. “In the process of moving to SF?” As if!
You forgot about the upcharge for the priviledge of getting to live with an internationaly sydicated journalist and bonafide reality T.V. star. That don’t come cheap.
Math is hard! Kidding though, I saw that too, that’s fucked up. The roommate pays more than both of them combined? Bullshit. People pull that crap sometimes with rentals but she has some balls (not Debbie’s!) to say it outright.
Actually, I think you’re right that it’s $5,500, per the building’s sale listing. So she gets ripped off and passes that grift on down the line, it’s beautiful.
Haven’t you heard? As a writer, Julia Allison gets $4 a word! Did you even look at the picture w/ this post? See those three words? Hell, Julia Allison made $12 just standing on an airport sidewalk w/ a twizzle dong hanging out of her gaping maw.
A tv and print journalist! It is to motherfucking laugh.
Has she ever written anything that wasn’t about herself?
Hey now, sometimes in “Social Studies” the international tech colyum she cut and pasted from startups’ press releases. How soon we forget!
Hey, this is the longest thing she’s published since that 10-page blog rant on Bravo’s site!
I think she cut and pasted most of it from the Airbnb listing that Toilet wrote, though.
Donkey will be done w/ Debbie immediately following Birthcray 2013.
Or after she pays him a surprise visit to his apartment in the Castro, walking in on him getting fisted. Bonus points if there’s a camera crew she hired to record her darling rom-com surprise visit.
Aww you just made my stomach hurt, I laughed so hard at that.
Dying.
He might have a shot at a career in twink pr0n, who knows.
“If you are a dog lover and willing to watch her when I am gone, I am willing to adjust rent.”
that is the worst. she has no reservations/fucks to give/iotas of concern for leaving a complete stranger to watch her elderly dog. ugh free lily never ends.
This is indeed the worst. She is the worst. She couldn’t pay ME $3200 to live there or with her, although it might be a all price to pay if it means Lilly can be secretly shuttled off to a good home. Who is willing to do this for Lilly?
Anyone remember when Loren Feldman was offering to buy Lilly? Didn’t he up the ante to $7 grand? Sounds like she may be just about that desperate now …
Loren is relocating to Los Angeles! Lock up these two idiots together in this horrid apartment and THAT’S a reality show I’d watch.
Until then he’s plastering his latest sugar momma all over Twitter… ugh.
I doubt she will give back the $40 to $50 a night a true boarding place will coast. She is such a nightmare.
You rang, Jordan’s adorable fluff ball? How I wish Lily lived like you do. Poor old girl.
Ugh this vile creature. I adopted my step daughters cat. He is old and toothless and as a result I am not going on a business trip to Las Vegas with hubcat next week. NOT GOING AND TENDING TO MY PET. What.a.piece.of.lazy.shit.
I enjoyed doing the math on this one. By my count, Debbie and Donkey each pay $1500 and the roommate pays $3200. Of course.
Oh and also! I assume the line about Debsers moving to SF serves two purposes; 1) to convince a would-be roommate that he’s not really a third roommate and 2) to wink-wink in this direction that she and La Debbois are moving to SF together.
Points for “La Debbois.”
Yes, I love “La Debbois.”
Coming out of lurkdom to also voice affection for la debois…
Oh goodness! Thank you! By all means take it, throw it in the community pot, whatever — consider it my contribution to repay the debt I owe the coiner of “how fuck?”
Blanche Debbois– he does rely on the kindness of strangers.
Beautiful, but may I suggest: Bland Debbois
That is wonderful.
It’s like clowns in a car, 3 people in 1,800 sq. ft. I live alone in 2,600 sq. ft. How would anyone not kill her in such close quarters?
I live alone in a Loire Valley castle, if you don’t count the servants or my stable boy Hungaborg. Peasant.
I live at Downton Abbey. I pay nothing and get to do needlepoint all day and wear pretty dresses.
I live in a damp cardboard box with my friends, Empty Cheetos Bag and Diphtheria, but Donkey isn’t here, so it’s the happiest place on earth.
+1
Her total rent is $5K per month. And she has the master bedroom. She is attempting to make money on this enterprise.
Just like Devin Stetler rents his OMGSexyDowntownLOLloft for 3k a month to pay 1600 to 1800 in rent and live off the rest.
Grifters be giriftin.’
As a landlord, I get ticked off by this bs. They’re making money off someone else’s investment property. I don’t allow subletting without my approval, and I definitely wouldn’t allow a rotating cast of characters via Airbnb. Moreover, I’m sure my neighbors wouldn’t appreciate seeing a bunch of strangers coming and going all the time.
It’s weird that he’s in a door man building and this goes on. He must be tipping them to keep them quiet.
Where’s Debbie getting all this money???
I can’t believe he gets 3k for that stupid place. How many sq feet is it?
2601 sq ft
No way it’s 2601 sq ft — I’d guess around 900.
Or maybe 1100, I dunno, but not 2601.
Does Debbie own the LOLoft, or is he paying rent on it, while shacking up in a donkey stall?
He rents it
I meant pays rent on it, and sublets it out, while tongue punching Julie’s fartbox in MdR. And now that her inheritance is disappearing, so is he.
Thanks for clarifying. So, how did he wind up in a somewhat expensive place? It’s not like his parents seem to have much $ and he didn’t have a rich granny die lately, did he?
Presumably he rented it while he still had a job. There’s no family money there.
So he was capable of getting and holding down a reasonably well-paying job for a period of time? Who knew?
LinkedIn.
Do we know this for sure? If so, she is trying to set it up so she and Debbie only pay a few hundred a month and some other poor clown moves into a furnished Barbie Princess Malibu Beach House and pays a whopping $3,200?
That reality show sure did change our Donkey. If you define change as remaining a complete fucking grifter asshole.
No one will pay that amount to live with these clowns. So deluded. Although, this level of desperation is making me interested in The Juliar Shitshow once again.
Of all the ridiculous bullshit, the “neat freak” is the winner. Just stop, Donks. Your poor hygiene has been documented numerous times, by your own dumb donkey self.
I also like how the STUNNING condo evolves from “luxury” to “super luxury” 96 paragraphs later. Which, I don’t know, but is it normal to write 115 paragraphs when you’re looking for a roommate, and in the process use ALL CAPS and psychotic smilies and dumbtalk about your “cough” reality show and a vewy vewy sewious relationship?
Does anyone have a screengrab of her god-awful hoarder-type bedroom that AIRED ON NATIONAL TELEVISION?? Neat freak, my ass.
To be fair, that shot was taken while she was moving in. She does keep a neat home. No tampons randomly thrown on the bathroom vanity for her. They are all safely hidden away in her kitchen cabinets.
That part about cleaners being $100 every two weeks? Hell, that’s between D0nkey & her stall muckers, why does she think that she can mandate a stablemate be part of her financial arrangements? What if potential stablemates are DIY neat freaks who don’t need to pay others to wipe their ass?
lol stall muckers!
Double LOL. Catladies are on fire with this post.
My thoughts exactly. Anyone that’s serious about finding an apt wants to know THE BASICS: rent, utilities, location, parking availability, etc. She just put her foot in her mouth by writing a ridiculous advertisement when no one is going to read past the $3,200 rent, and anyone who does would never live here because she only proved that she is a crazy woman.
Naive kids right out of school, with parents who can foot the bill.
Donk wrote more words in this ad than the Elle (online only) column that she had a teary breakdown over having to write..
this.
I have subletted a million times and I have to say the following:
1) She sounds like a a complete crazed person have a hypomanic episode and I would click “next” immediately.
2) I don’t want to live with anybody who describes themselves as a “a home body.” If I’ve got $3200 to spend, I’ve got better options.
3) The cleaning fee 2x a month is bullshit and I would never pay an additional $200 a month for that. “A neat freak” shouldn’t need it either.
4) If I had $3200 to spend, I can get a cool bungalow or condo in Malibu or Venice and live on my own AND HAVE PRIVACY AND HAVE MY OWN DAMN PARTIES and not have to pick up dog shit for the reduced rent price of $4.00 a night.
Also, 50$ monthly for utilities? Impossible. Would not even cover cold running water (even w/ a mizzen (sp?) a few steps down the “beach path.” Where Lily goes.)
She probably doesn’t pay for utilities and is just desperate for an extra fifty bucks.
Time to sell one of her beat down Chanel bags!
Midden, that’s the word I meant. I are the dumb (but not as dumb as a dumb-ass donkey, I pray.)
neat freak=I have no hobbies or interests, I read no books, and MY BOYFRIEND left his old typewriter at his sexy downtown loft, so my place looks like a sterile room display at Pottery Barn Teen
It’s not just that though. She’s posted many pix that make me feel certain I wouldn’t want to stand next to her, let alone share a super luxury condo with her. Greasy pelts, spackled face (refreshed with saliva once in a while), unwashed hooves positioned on coffee tables or in people’s laps, dog (?) shit (?) on the floor, stained and sweaty flammable costumes, unspeakably nasty hoof covers adorned with GRIME. All this whilst the cretin is trying to pose as a pretty pink princess. It is to VOM and LAUGH and VOM again.
I’m sorry, I realize I should feel free to relax and pay some bills, but the fact that this NAST creature has the audacity to pretend that she’s not only a normal reasonably sanitary person, but a special snowflake “neat freak” drives my inner Mr. Monk mental.
or neat freak = HOW DARE YOU MOVE THE TIME OUT NEW YORK RIPPED UP MAGAZINE COVER WHILE YOU DO LAUNDRY? OR PUT YOUR BOOKS IN THE BOOKSHELVES WHERE MY NEON PINK JULIA SIGN IS?!?
woopsie
“we have a brand new 47 inch flat screen with cable, etc,”
so there IS cable
“Completely furnished with top of the line Rachel Ashwell Shabby Chic”
I didn’t know Target was considered top of the line. I love Target but please, enough with the BS. The world is not as stupid as you would like to think.
‘ (even the towels and sheets are gorgeous)’
Shilldebeast is claiming that dung brown grifted sheets are gorgeous? LOL
why would anyone want to sleep in a strange donkey’s sheets? if you have $3k+ to drop on rent, surely you’d have your own nice stuff you’d like to bring with you, not sleep in someone else’s bed, etc.?
Strange indeed. Also, “Your queen sized bed is brand new”…. false. Ambray’s bed isn’t old but it ain’t brand new, either.
STABLEMATES WHO’VE SLEPT THERE:
1] Flusher Price
2] Ambray
3] Bland Debbois
Knowing D0nkey, she’s probably hoping to end up on one of the court tv shows that pays $5k to both defendants & plaintiffs, win or lose.
Donks admitted that one of her “top of the line” Rachel Ashwell couches was a discounted floor sample.
Didn’t she also say that the dining table was defective (had a biggo scratch in it) or something like that? And she completely left out the bit about the sagging curtains hung by grifted Task Rabbits?
Hey D0nkey! Remind us … who won those Target gift cards you allegedly gave away for Tressemme?
Don’t most adults have their own furniture already? I bought my first Marge Carson table at 27 (fyi that table cost more than what donk made last year).
I’m sorry, but that is some fugly shit.
http://www.margecarson.com/results.php?cid=58&pg=all
Haha-I spent like a drunk sailor at one point in my life. Happy I had the opportunity to do what I wanted, but don’t feel the need for this kind of “stuff” anymore. The table isn’t on the site, but this is more reflective.
http://www.margecarson.com/detail.php?by=Dining Tables&cid=40&pid=261
Isn’t “top of the line” and “shabby chic” an oxymoron?
Super shabby, more like.
My last two roommates, really amazing, awesome girls, BOTH fell in love while living here and left to move in with their boyfriends.
Who is Flusher Price aka Little Julia living w/? I thought Lewith blew her off …
Imagine that! Two “sisters,” screaming into the night, because they “fell in love.” Okey dokey.
But were they tiny and cute roommates?
They must have been or how else would they have found boyfriends?
ANSWERING MYSELF:
::
::waves at she who will remain unnamed
Julia Price @JuliaPriceMusic Casual dinner conversation turned into a song. Perks of living with another songwriter @dannirosner
@dannirosner is a female … @juliaallison is (still) a lying sack of shit.
What about the perks of living with a lying, grifting sociopath, huh?
Isn’t that the inspiration for one of your songs?
She must have stories to tell.
Unless she’s as mental as Donkey…
Here she is, hanging out with all of Julia’s supposed “friends.” Remember when Donkey leaked it to us herself that she was dating DeStorm? TOOL.
http://instagram.com/p/TuHMC7j3n-/
This just keeps getting better and better. Nice work!
That was just to show us she is down with the homies.
She broke up with him when she realized he wasn’t game for wrapping up corn in tinfoil and handing it to her every time she needed a snack.
+1000 for “fleeing from corn” reference.
How fuck does she know what the OWNER of the property wants to do with it at the end of the lease? May 2013, right?
And. Casting about how much she (who?) would charge for the furnished apartment. What’s that all about? Who is she to set rental rates on the next lease?
This Donkey drives me insane.
There is no way in hell she will get what she is asking for in rent.
Also, I think JP’s transbraytion is on the nose.
Next stop, San Francisco
Isn’t the building for sale?
Transbraytion: “I’ll help you get in good with the landlord to get this place after I get finish my lease and you give me $1,00,000 for my Shitty Chic furniture!”
MY CHECKLIST!!!!
*If you’re a neat freak, you don’t need cleaners ever.
*”I am super healthy”? More like “I cry myself to sleep”
*She always says “trust me”. Why would anyone trust someone they’ve never met?
*”Most beautiful place I’ve ever lived”. And you are….?
*Not everyone who is single thinks snagging a man is their top priority–nor is it a reason to rent a place. (Who thinks like that?)
*We do not permit parties=I have no friends ever
*Why would you want a place with a hot tub and never party?
FIN
Also, “I am super healthy (usually vegan and gluten free).”
Usually.
She meant it at the time!
Yes, that jumped out at me too. “Usually.” Because she suffers sooooo very badly from Celiac.
Also, why the FUCK would a prospective co-renter need to know that?
WHY? Because that’s D0nkey’s legalese version of Full Disclosure, ie:
lawyersbacked-up toilets are inevitable.Because, just like with most of the people she dates (Debbie excluded), she has a checklist for roommates that she fails to realize holds them to a much higher standard than she herself can give them in return.
She can’t not brag. About anything. Even the banal and the untrue.
Oh my fucking God, this tool actually signed an extended lease on a place that rents for $6,400 A FUCKING MONTH? Her half of the rent is that much fucking money?
My God, she is truly an idiot. Did she manage to get out of the lease on the car? Because I own a home and support two kids, and I don’t have to put out that much money a month for three people to live. And she is unemployed.
Her parents must be beside themselves.
for all we know her rent is $3,200
+1
Ding ding ding!
Can’t you totally see her pretending that the rent’s 6400, and that they’re both coughing up 32 apiece – when, in reality, the roommate’s covering the entire rent?
Bingo. She’s cheap and a liar.
if she can get it, more power to her.
‘Scuse YOU — it is a LUXURY condo, not that a desk-errand jockey such as yourself would have any concept of such.
P.S.: People who bang on about “luxury” are the same people who think “classy” is an appropriate adjective for … anything. Donkey is a prime example. No concept.
Ding-ding-ding! Along with people who want “the finer things in life.”
Sorry. Back the conversation…..
She is full of shit.
$6 Grand a month gets you an amazing apartment nearly anywhere in New York not a condo, in Tribeca or on the UES west of Park. I can’t imagine what it would get in LA. Probably the mansion out of the severed horse’s head scene in “The Godfather,” minus the severed horse’s head. Or maybe with the severed head and it dispenses Kentucky Bourbon and plays “The Impossible Dream” when you kick it.
Totally. I admit I don’t know much about the MDR real estate but I have a friend with an entire gorgeous house in Baldwin Hills that she didn’t charge that much for when she moved to NYC.
That’s the rent, according to the sales listing for the building. She’s just that stupid.
Great, now I sort of want the head.
She’ll be lucky to get out of this place without being sued for unpaid rent. TRUST. (not fund)
Seriously. She’s going to be on the hook for all $6400 a month because nobody with that much to spend wants a fucking roommate. She will come begging to Momsers and Dadsers very quickly, because holy fuck $6400 a month.
This will, I have no doubt, put them over the edge. There is no fucking way they’ll pony up that much on the side just to keep Donk in a condo two hundred yards away from the sand in LA. No way. She is demonstrating to her father that she is either A) completely incompetent with money, or B) does not give a shit about his pocketbook, or C) trying unsuccessfully to scam him. I would be beyond livid if I were him.
Her raftass would (and SHOULD) be in a 1 bedroom in Culver for $1000/month until she got a real fucking job.
I cannot stop laughing. $6400 a month for a TWO BEDROOM that she has to share with a ROOMMATE! This makes the Pink Palace look practical and mature.
Imagine rooming w/ D0nkey & being subjected to a 24/7 loop of MASS DESPISED on a 47″ screen …
Win!
(donkeys are cute)
You rang?!
My favorite part is “only four years old” — so, opened for renters in late 2008-09, an overpriced luxury condo, presumably targeting rubes too stupid to see that the bottom is falling/had fallen out! BEACHFRONT LUXURY OMG SEXY.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but don’t furnished apartments typically rent for LESS than whatever the standard rent would be? Because most sane, not-sad adults have their own furniture and things they’d actually like to keep in their apartment, so asking people to live with YOUR things and not theirs usually knocks some $$ off the rent?
Yes
Those corporate short-stay furnished apartments rent for more than comparable empty apartments, but they have clean furniture, no dogs, no moldy dresses as decor, and most importantly no donkeys or debbies.
Those corp apts also aren’t pink.
Or have tutus hanging from the walls.
$3,200 to rent a room and share a pad with 2 other people, and a dog. So basically, Julie wants someone to move in and pay her rent for her? Damn.
Other people have serious relationships Julia Allison has VERY serious relationships, mothafuckas.
Word, yo.
Ok.. so where the hell is our real estate loving attorney, AFF?
It looks Julia’s place might actually rent out for the $6,200/month she mentioned. This baughles the mind, why wouldn’t someone just buy something? Even in L.A. you can get a mortgage for less than that.. Damn.
http://www.redfin.com/CA/Marina-Del-Rey/25-Quarterdeck-St-90292/home/6782667
But still.. 3 people living there, while Julia and Devin split $3,000 ($1,500/each), and the poor bastard roommate forks over $3,200? She’s trying to screw some poor fool again.
And it looks like they’ve been trying to sell the building/duplex for a while now. $2.85mil at the end of February, and then lowered the price to $2.69mil in May. And it looks like the owner picked it up for peanuts back in July of 2010, $250k (WTF?). Zillow says it was built in 2007, so did someone really buy this pad for that little in 2010? Damn.
Isn’t the owner a relative (nephew?) of the previous owner (bought it from an aunt’s estate?) Not quite right, but it seems like what was dug up & posted here before was some kind of familial (hairy times!) transfer, which could account for the low sales price.
Ahhh.. That might explain some things. The lot was bought for $530k in 1999, they built the place, then the whole thing was sold for $250k in 2010.
The relative discount thing might work.. Years ago my dad once sold me a 10 year old truck for $1. Yay Dadsers.
That was some kind of estate transfer thing from one of the late Dawn Roddy’s companies to her consolidated trust estate, which is managed by her nephew. I spent hours looking this shit up.
AFF and I got all Nancy Drew/Hardy Boy on this in September and apparently she really is being ripped off to that extent.
To which Nelson Muntz says “HA-ha!”
she really is being ripped off
But no one forced her to enter into a rental agreement at the same rate Bravo or Blondie could justify paying as a business expense for a short duration … She’s Just Stupid (ring! ring!) … I imagine that Dad$er tried to talk sense into her, but no, she’s too intoxicated off fumes of her own bullshit too realize that $75k* annual rent vs no annual income is a legally binding negative ca$h flow.
*I love how she says the utilities are about $50 a mo. Really, D0nkey? Is math that FN hard that you think your tap water, gas stove & artificial lighting only cost you all year long what your puny leased MB costs you in one mo? You blow $600 a year on dragstumes, ya dumbfuck.
Oh, agree she’s a total sucker. Same with the Cunt-class Mercedes. They see her dumb ass coming.
lolz…catladies have been hilarious on this post. Hooray for the return of true Cray!!
Amazing how much better the place looked before she Barbie-d it up.
So $6,500 a month? JESUS. What a complete bonehead. She truly thought that show was going to lead to fame and fortune for her, huh? That riches were just going to fall into her lap. She is just soooo dumb.
If that’s the apartment, it says a sale is pending.
W/out luxurious furnishings (including fine art work), there’s nothing ‘thuper luckthury!’ about D0nkey’s stall. Sorry, your own name in a neon lampbox is for shit, you navel-gazing asshat.
What I want to know is what (non-working?) contraption is D0nkey hiding behind the barside mirror … would that be a dumbwaiter? Is it broke, or is she so narcissistic that she needs a mirror in her vicinity at all times & so lazy that she hires a Task Rabbit to empty her garbage?
Can’t believe that Julia Allison had the audacity to claim on AirBNB that the place is beachfront, cuz no, you have to peer between two buildings in front of the place to see a strip of sand. Every view from the place is at another building.
She truly thought that show was going to lead to fame and fortune for her, huh? That riches were just going to fall into her lap. She is just soooo dumb.
She’s been operating under that delusion for years, ever since she was reasonably attractive enough to be on TV. Back when that Star job (as an editor who neither edits nor writes) fell into her lap, she didn’t embrace it and make the most of a golden (and undeserved) opportunity. Instead, she just thought that showing up and being her bitch self would bring her the same fate as the woman who had the job before she did. That woman was the MUCH more personable and attractive Jill Dobson, who worked her tail off (as much as a teevee babbling head can do) and got a full-time job with Fox News.
Donkey assumed that she’d be the next one to get a full-time gig at FNC and acted like an entitled cunt whenever she was there. She not only assumed she’d be hired, but that she’d be a star there. But assholes can’t stop being assholes (even in pursuit of a golden opportunity), and now she’s pretty much banned from any media that actually has viewers.
I have two mortgages, one on cape cod and the other slightly north of Boston and together they are not this much.
Agree, you can rent 5,000sq. ft. in Scottsdale for that kind of money. I just want to meet the person who rents into this crazy scenerio. I think travel to the moon may be cheaper and safter than living with her. She forgot to mention that along with being the dog’s caregiver you also get to be JA’s maid and run her to the airport to fly off to her see her very serious girl, I mean boyfriend.
Do you need a girlfriend?
This is Le Debbois’ (props, A Bray in Manger) profile picture. Jesus fucking christ. What a pretty douchey pony.
The douchebaggery is strong in this one.
The guy on the right is trying to incinerate Debbie with laser-eyes.
The guy on the right looks like Jack McBRAYER.
Gang signs and a toddler’s knee-sock augmented crotchel area? OK then. (Perfect soul-mate for A Donkey, though.)
P.S.: that picture is the EXACT equivalent Donk’s from last NYE (no, I think maybe 2 NYEs ago) where she’s busting a move in her black-nursing-bra-with-net-illusion-overlay-cum-ridiculous-tiara (my personal favorite photo of A Donkey.) They are made for each other, indeed.
Oh God. Her Herp Derp dance.
Thanks, Professor! I had forgotten that existed. Brilliant.
Thanks, Professor!
This was back when she was angling hard to be Mrs. Pancakes. I can only imagine what his family thought of the NYE pics of her in the nursing bra and sheer top.
♫ Seven loons a leaping … ♫
OMG!!! love, love, love. yeah, nursing bra NYE is right up there with Fauxga and EasterWhore as best Donkpics ever.
Is this new or new to me? Either way it’s the best thing I have seen all week.
Is that not only a white suit, but a SILK white suit? it looks shiny. Jeebus onefat Melmo.
Damn, she finally wrote her book!
Right? Whenever I open a dating profile and it uses this many words, I always think CRAZY! And never, never reply. A date you can get away from. This, THIS you would have to live with AND PAY FOR IT.
How long do you think she spent writing this opus?
No thanks, Donkey, I’ll take this beach bungalow with it’s outdoor space, privacy, no $200 a month cleaning bullshit and quick walk to Abbot Kinney instead!
http://losangeles.craigslist.org/wst/sub/3485289881.html
Want to stay there now. That looks relaxing. And no moldy prom dresses!
EX-FUCKING-ACTLY.
She is literally smoking crack if she thinks she’ll find someone to pay $3200 for a roommate/share situation in MDR.
I also found this, master bedroom + private bath in a Venice Beach bungalow for $2,600:
http://losangeles.craigslist.org/wst/roo/3534595654.html
Or, how about this (from Westside Rentals) for $3,000 a month: ‘Beautiful 2 Bedroom + Den with Ocean and Mountain Views across the entire front.’ Your own fucking apartment. IN FUCKING MALIBU. That you don’t have to share with some fame-whoring wannabe creeper and her lesbian boyfriend.
Seriously. “The Malibu of the South???” No one in the history of LA has ever thought of MDR as anything but “The Place Between Venice and The Airport With Lots Of Office Parks And Also A Panera Bread.”
LOL, so true.
This.
Two out of two Garys agree that MDR blows. Although the 90 Freeway is the strangest and most delightful 2-mile stretch of road out here.
Playa, on the other hand, is kind of cool in a real rundown, ramshackley-beach-town-kinda way.
Exactly!
Donkey is too stupid to realize that if you renting a room, you can’t charge more than what a whole apartment in the area costs.
For the same money, most people would rather not deal with (braying psychotic) roomates.
Exactly. Took about 2 minutes on google. If a person wanted to live in MDR, they could get their own cute place, all amenities, like this one: http://tinyurl.com/b4mnc92 and save a shit-ton on rent vs the horror of rooming with donkey. Girl is delusional.
I love when she gives us gifts like this, I only wished I’d seen it sooner in the day. Annnd again, shabby chic was “cool” if you even really wanted to call it that, like 6 years ago.
Exactly. That shabby chic crap actually peaked in 2004, with Ashwell trying to revive it again in 2009. But yes, Donks is way behind on all trends, so nothing new there.
I thought Shabby Chic was only “cool” in the ’90s
IMO, Shabby Chic is only cool when it’s what happens naturally. Paying out the wazoo for newly distressed crap that has all the endurance of an Ikea packing crate to create a contrived element of personality because you lack actual personality yourself? In D0nkey’s case, that’s nothing more than Shifty Hick.
Monica Lewinsky was also a huge fan (actual fact). It’s where I first heard about the phenom — her luxury apartment in the Watergate, also shabby chic.
Note to potential renters:
Anything chocolate or sugary you bring in to the house will disappear so hide your sweet stuff well. Or else it will be hoovered down a donkey’s maw in one of her maniac moments or thrown in the trash in one of her self righteous purges of the evil sugar.
Mama Pancakes’ cookies- never forget
I just barked.
Those right there are the main reason I gave up smoking pot.
Fiber One bars for me. They were the only sweet thing in the house and my ability to think through the next-day consequences were quite blunted.
And you will have no privacy because every move you make will be posted online with the caption “My amazing roommate and The Boy making me dinner.”
At the bottom of her Craig’s List ad it says:
“it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests”
But then it also says:
“OK to contact me about appearing in CL documentary series”
!!! There’s a link in that sentence above that leads to this:
Now casting a new web-series starring craigslist users.
Intriguing CL story? Email us! craigslist@beyondcasting.com
Brownstone Entertainment, in association with craigslist, is casting a new web-series featuring the stories of actual craigslist postings and the CL users behind them.
We are looking for LA area craigslist users who will share their journey through the posting process — from what sparked the initial idea to a successful (or not so successful) conclusion.
Be a part of this often hilarious, sometimes touching but always entertaining online series.
For more information please email: craigslist@beyondcasting.com
So maybe that’s the new career plan.
Considering the existence of this, and the fact that she is using Craigslist after previously being all about Airbnb… I’d say yes.
Ding ding ding for the win!
Again, I’m old so correct me please, but I think of craig’s list is a place pedophiles troll and people buy washer and dryers. Her ad is the equivalent of posting a pink scented flyer with glitter writing on a grocery store cork board with tear tags circa 1970.
Okay, this has made me ragier than perhaps anything I’ve ever seen Julia do. I was seriously rooting for her this time. Honestly. Even with the gay boyfriend. And that goddamn Craigslist post just convinced me that she will seriously, really, never change.
(Time for me to be a douche, but I’m trying to emphasize just how ridiculous this is.) I earn a salary on the low end of six figures, plus solid health insurance (which apparently Julia lacks) and a company cafeteria (Yay Silicon Valley!!), and I would NEVER dream of paying more than $2500/month for an apartment at my current salary. It just isn’t practical. I know lots of idiots who pay $3k+, leaving them with zero savings and mounting credit card debt because they can’t afford their groceries after paying their rent. I also live (with a roommate) in a 2BR/2BA in a neighborhood that’s way more convenient and central than Marina del Bray, in a city that’s much more expensive than Los Angeles, with laundry in the building, a doorman, and an elevator. I pay south of $2000 for my share of the apartment (including utilities and internet).
$3200 for something that isn’t even your own apartment? No. Fucking. Way. I also just love how she says her roommate will have to take care of Lilly while she travels. I would NEVER expect my roommate to take care of my kitty while I’m gone. Princess Fluffles has a regular cat-sitter who is paid handsomely in fancy bottles of whiskey.
@Sad: you work for Google or Facebook?
Hey, there are a few other companies in the valley that enjoy feeding their employees in the hopes that they never leave the office.
Regardless of rent.. In Austin you could rent a huge pad for $900, 2 bedrooms for not much more. The silicon valley rents are stupid, and those that pay they are too.
The tech scene is also happenening in Austin, but the cost of living is much more in line with normal people. We don’t have $3k rent for a 1 bedroom here. Just doesn’t happen.
The hilarious thing is that in San Francisco if you get out of the “choice” neighborhoods where all the dotcom dumbasses are looking, you can find pretty good deals and they don’t have to be in grubby shared houses in the Mission. There are just so many idiots who think they NEED to live in SoMa/Marina/Pac Heights.
Compared to an Austin or Philly or even LA though, it’s still ridiculous and I’m planning on having my next job (assuming I can get one) take me to one of these more reasonable places.
What neighborhoods do you suggest? I’m looking to sublet May and June. Thx!
Do you know where you’ll be working yet (assuming the move is for work), and will you have a car?
No car and I work freelance. I’m really going to test out the city. I’m over LA.
Hey now Marina is actually a way better bargain than SoMa and Pac Heights and prettier/safer.
Oh god. Stay out of Soma — it’s ugly, the bars suck, it’s really not that safe especially once you get past 4th St., and the rents are inflated so much worse than the rest of the city.
Malformed Face: Move to the laid-back, surfy part of the Sunset, and get a bike. Or if you want to be relatively central, my friends who live near Alamo Square love it.
Malformed Face: Agreed on the stay out of SoMa. Also avoid the Tenderloin, Tenderknob (aka “Lower Nob Hill). The Marina is lovely and sunny, but only tolerable if you’re a sorority/frat type and <26.
Rents are absurd in any SF neighborhood with <45min MUNI ride downtown. The city also changes practically block-by-block (microhoods!), so it's hard to know safety/cleanliness/# of homeless people until you've been on that block awhile.
I'd recommend a sublet in Hayes Valley, Lower Haight, Alamo Square, Duboce Triangle, or Cole Valley. Second choices: Nob Hill, Russian Hill, North Beach (all three are a long commute to fun nightlife/restaurant areas like the Mission). MUNI is absurdly slow and the hills cut off certain parts of town (read: taxi required). Glen Park is a great area for proximity to BART, but not really where you want to start off. You'll find something
@Hooves, I actually really like the Marina. (Shoot me.) And I have friends in my age demo (30ish) who are married couples who live there and love it. I haven’t been hunting for housing recently, though, and I assumed that due to an influx of dotcommers the prices would have gone way up.
Prices are made even more bizarre by where the Apple, Facebook, Google, etc. shuttles stop. Proximity to a shuttle stop can drive up rents because employees want to live there and landlords know they can charge more.
Transportation in San Francisco is a beast, and you have to pick your neighborhood carefully because it’s not just going to be where you live, it’s going to be where you eat and drink and shop too. It’s not like NYC where you can be 6 neighborhoods away from Whole Foods and still be there in 10 minutes on an express train.
Sad rat, we gotta hang on Chestnut sometime.
People who don’t spend much time outside of bars in the Marina think it’s just 20 something douchebags. Completely untrue. It’s strollerville and old people as well.
Those strawberry shenanigans at Tipsy Pig get me every time.
@Sad Rat and @Leased: I don’t hate the Marina and I have quite a few friends who live there. Great restaurants, beautiful sunny weather, great stores. But if you want the “real SF experience” (whatever that means), it’s probably not there to start off… and the taxis can add up.
Yes! The stupid corporate shuttle buses really screw up rent. I tried to move for two years and lost several apartments to Googlers paying more than the full year’s rent up front in cash. Here’s a great map of the stops: http://stamen.com/zero1/
I’ll vouch for that — I was down there up until 15 mo’s ago in a 4/2/2 (more than 2200+ sq ft) house (fenced back yard!) that was roughly six yrs old — rent = $1350.
And if you go to Iowa or Alaska you’ll pay save even more money. I’m not a fan of rent comparisons, since it’s all relative. I’m also not a fan of making $0/month and then braying about a luxury beach home that you share with your “probable life partner.”
Yeah, quite honestly, SF, LA and such aren’t the only places tech people can work.
I live in AZ and I’m in tech, for a company that has 600+ employees just in their IS dept. Go Daddy is here as well as many other tech heavy companies. I have two houses. One 2 bath, 2 bedroom up in Northern AZ (so I an escape the heat) and one in the city that’s 4 bed, three bath. For BOTH houses combined, I pay $2,400 a month.
Not that I want any more people flocking here but, I’m just saying.
I am in AZ too!!! Yay! I am a physicist and when I graduated, everybody told me I have to go to the Bay area or the East Coast to find a job (in the industry) coz AZ has nothing! But I did find a job here and a good one too! And yes, I pay only $1000 a month for my really nice condo and can go hiking and climbing and run outdoors 10 months of the year!!! Yay!!!
Actually, I would think you could run and hike and all that 12 months out of the year. It’s just that 7 of those 10 months it’s over 110 degrees. You do have to factor that in.
That’s why I, after 30 years of living here, had to get another place up in the mountains. 350+ days of sunshine per year is not all it’s cracked up to be!
I have higher sunshine tolerance, thanks to the melanin pigments I inherited from my Indian (from India, not Native american – not that it matters, but in case anyone was wondering) Mother! I can run/ hike/ climb outside right into May. But yes, in June, July and August, I drive to Payson to do those fun things…..and I dont mind that one bit! And I am totally on the same page with you on getting a place up north and have been looking at cabins in Payson! But being in grad school for 5 years sets one back quite a bit, financially. So it will still be another year before I can save for a down payment on a 2nd place. I hope prices do not jump up a whole lot in another year!
Yeah for all the AZ neighbors-N. Scottsdale you could rent 5,000sq. ft. for what donk is paying (and not have to live with her).
If I were paying that much– and I never would– I’d demand full housemate status. Sorry, but if you’re paying half (or more) of the rent, you get a vote on the house rules. You get space for your own bike and boogie board, you get to lay out your own towels instead of using a donkey’s skidmark-brown towels, you get to stock the fridge with whatever food you like, etc.
I was seriously rooting for her this time. Honestly. Even with the gay boyfriend. And that goddamn Craigslist post just convinced me that she will seriously, really, never change.
That was your mistake – assuming that Donkey could change. Bitch only gets worse as time goes on. Actually, the only thing keeping her from being cuntier is that she blew up her chance to be famous, and totally ruined what looks she had. If she were famous and attractive, she’d be an even bigger bitch.
I’ve known people who were pretty awful famewhores, including some in Donk’s current and former circles, who made complete 180s and are now extremely decent human beings. Julia may be beyond hope though.
Donkey is a different breed. Literally and figuratively.
No redeeming qualities: no work ethic, lack of discernible talent for her alleged careers (tv personality & journalist), nasty personality, blatantly uses people, not interesting (except as a sad trainwreck), delusional (again, not in a fun way). Social poison.
Name some names & tell some stories, please!
About half of the people JA hung out with in her “tech celebrity” phase fit that bill IMHO. I work in the Valley, have worked in NY in the past, and cross paths with some of them pretty regularly. If you’d told me 5 years ago that they’d turn into functional, professional adults who could keep their egos in check, I’d have been shocked.
Then again, a few people from those days (*cough* Brit Morin *cough*) used to be great folks and are now insufferable.
I would LOVVVVVVVVVVVE some Brit Morin stories. Dear Greg, is she something else. She really fancies herself quite the super model and I love hearing stories about how she pays freelancers nothing and treats interns like shit. What a delight!
I actually don’t think I’ve spoken to her since she went off on her housewife vanity project venture, but what shocks me even more than her affinity for putting shirts around your waist as skirts as calling them “style hacks” is that she was INCREDIBLY well-respected at Google, both by colleagues and by external partners. I don’t think I could stand to be in the same room with her anymore.
You can’t fix a sociopath.
Also, I love how this theoretical sucker who’s paying $3,200 doesn’t even get the parking space.
Granted, I’ve never gone to the beaches at Marina del Rey because why would anyone, but unless it’s permit parking, finding a spot would be like a needle in a haystack.
The grifting is just off the charts.
She’s insane. What fool would pay $3200 to rent what is essentially a bedroom in an apartment, since the place is already furnished and she is so controlling. And how cheeky to ask for so much rent while imposing all of those restrictions? No parties, by the way there’s a dog, etc etc etc. And notice she didn’t mention how much rent SHE’S paying. She’s probably getting her roommate to pay the majority of the rent. Ugh.
Whoever decides to be her roommate after reading that description deserves everything they get.
Yikes, I just went down the ex-roomie/bestie/sister rabbit hole and ended up on Toilet Julia’s Facebook. Trying to decide what is more cringe-worthy: the photoshopped cover photo or her Ke$ha cover. Seriously, who tells people like her and the Zuckerberg sis that they should sing? They’re barely drunken karaoke levels of good.
Oh Hai evereadybattery its Mr. Smee, RollsParkerHouseStale! I am writing to tell you that I am rending my cool apartment which is luxury for a real swell deal. It is on CPW (Which stand for Central Park Western) and do you know the building that was in Ghostbusters and the one that was in Rosemary’s Babble it is not those it the other one.
Anyway I had two roommates who both fell in love (not with each other) (with a guy) (two guys who were different) (although I could not tell them apart and just called them both Gary) (and when no one was there Stinky asshole who eats all the food in the firdge) and now they have moved away somewhere and I don’t know where they went and they left the tarantula tank. SO if you want to live in a super luxury building with a doorman and a tarantula and an empty fridge this is your chance!!!!! (The taranatula is in her tank and not in the empty fridge.)
I am usually not here but when I am here I am really really here and not just a little bit here the way ghosts are or maybe bad memories of people like your roommates who never fed the damn tarantula that was totally their idea to get. So when I am here I am the Queen of the Couch and of the TV and be quiet but when I am not here you cannot have parties because last time there was a party two people totally had sex on my desk because they couldn’t use my bed because = puddle of throw up. Most of the time I am here though.
The building is very grand with an elevator that works and supper doper luxury all over the walls and there are lost of details that are Prewar which means that before they invented Hitler this place was nice. And it still is !!!!! Some actress that was in a movie that has not been remade yet used to live here unless that was the Ropemary Burble place. And I think Yoko Ohno is totally the other building too. Plus there is a cute guy on my hallway named Patrick who is always working out and using his skiprope and one time he did it on the roof and he did not know I was up there and he was only wearing his shorts and you could kind of see his junk bounce up and down. (so cute).
Anyway there is a view of the park if you lean out the window really far with someone hanging on to your dress and there is a stove that I guess you could cook with except there are so many rataurants everywhere here that you could be eaten out every day andnever taste the same food from Africa twice!!! And there is so much supper luxury that it is like super-luxury is wearing a little red cape and flew in your window and then takes you on a little flight around New York like in Sooperman with the guy who wound up in the wheelchair that was depressing, so sad, plus that was the Ghostbusted building.
PS. FREE TARANTULA
RollsRoyce, please tell me you’re a professional writer. This was so funny!
Hilarious!
Patrick will love her.
Thank you for my name enhancement. And for the phrase “before they invented Hitler this place was nice.” To express my gratitude, my underpaid, over-brayed intern will be sending you a sweaty, grifted, plush Sexy Janice from the Muppets costume.
I so enjoy these RRR.
This is awesome. Just started my shitty day at work and this madde me laugh. Thanks!
Ooooohhhh mai gawd, okay I am in the process of having a stroke from trying so hard to stifle my laughter at my jerbs, I am church giggling myself to death! DEATHS!!
“When I am here I am really really here” – MOAR PLZ.
She is so full of shit with that $6200 fucking figure.
Hey, you stupid fugly Donkey – you’re fucking bat shit because my place is nicer than yours in a better area and not even I pay that much. Fucking grifter whore.
I pay around $3000 USD for a 1000 square foot apartment in central Paris. It’s an awesome place 1 minute away from a Metro with brand new appliances, hardwood floors, a balcony and sky lights. I can’t imagine paying MORE for a so-so area in LA with a crazy roommate (two really since Debbie lives there too) and no parking space.
Anyone who signs up for this is nuts.
Can anyone in LA confirm this is ridiculously high for rent on a so-so place?
Yes. Because now with unemployment so high and people who got into crazy mortgages, a lot of people are moving out of their homes, subletting them and renting cheaper places. Which means there is glut of small homes in nice areas you can rent for $3200 AND BE ON YOUR OWN.
Also, $3200 and you can be anywhere you want in the city in a one bedroom WITH NO ROOMMATES and be able to have privacy and parties.
So much this. You can have a house in Silverlake or Echo Park, a kickass condo in the Wilshire Corridor, an apartment or house in West Hollywood…hell, even a place in Malibu for this much.
THIS IS FOR A BEDROOM, PEOPLE.
A bedroom that you can’t put any stuff in.
It’s asinine and when the original numbers were floating around when she first moved out here, I said it couldn’t possibly be that much because, hey, it’s Marina and you can live off Montana in SM for less.
Basically it’s a high status marker fail. The place is probably built on indian burial grounds too.
That might account for the golem floating back unbidden.
Oh Donkey. Where to begin? You clearly want to impress upon the reader that you stopped mid-sexually delicious fuck with your TOTES HETERO boyfriend to write this post about your THUPER LUXTHURY so-close-to-the-beach-it-is-sometimes-mistaken-for-a-poorly-designed-yacht sterile gauze pad. Perhaps there were better ways of doing this than by emphasizing that your TOTES HETERO BOYFRIENDJULIAHASABOYFRIEND is moving to the boy-in-boy action capital of everywhere (although, while we’re talking about Austin…), presumably without you. Did he tell you he wants to move up there on his own first to get his feet on the ground? That means his feet will never, ever be on the ground. Unless he’s using them to brace himself so he doesn’t get cut in half by the dresser that JP’s Columbian decorator friend still lovingly calls Papi.*
* I have been here a long fucking time. Bonus points to anyone who gets the reference from an earlier incarnation of this blog. More bonus points if that person is not JP.
I don’t even get that reference.
I don’t get it, but it made me think of Agador …
http://rebloggingdonk.com/2009/07/27/julia-shut-the-fuck-up/#comment-37875
I was wrong: it was a chair. I have still been here way too long.
Her NGMB would be so PROUD!
Julia Allison Baugher’s inheritance blown on renting a condo for a year, a Mercedes lease, and a life-altering trip to Peru. Did she perchance mention that’s what Granny would’ve wanted in her holiday memories Sun-Times article that I didn’t read? Where she graciously donated the $50 to Grifters Without Borders?
Hold on, I forgot Burning Man and Fashion Week. Duly noted. Definitely should include those in the equation. Okayy, totally makes sense now.
HOLY FUCKING GOD, SHE IS INSANE.
For 500 bucks less a month, you can get a 2 bedroom 2 bath place to your own about a quarter mile from Donk’s place.
Or here for even cheaper, also nearby.
Or fuck it, maybe you really do want to spend $3200 a month. You can buy a place in Playa Vista, not that far away from the Marina, for that kind of monthly outlay.
Or fuck it, you want to blow $3200 a month in rent. get a place in Malibu, for fuck’s sake, not the Marina.
She is completely out of her fucking gourd to try to sublet that place for that much. I strongly, strongly suspect that she’ll break the lease soon, when she gets no takers (or she lands some rich Saudi dude who wants to bone both her and Debbie on those nights he’s in the States).
Maybe she’ll luck out and the building will get sold and the new owner will want the tenants out?
If the building is sold, it has to be a mutual agreement between the new owner and the tenant, otherwise the terms of the old lease still apply.
That is to say, if the new owner wants to continue to soak her for $6400 a month, he can, until she gives notice.
But let’s be honest here– the place went Pending on August 9th. It would have cleared escrow by now. I’m guessing that the deal fell through, and the old owner hasn’t decide to relist it because they’re waiting for this funky MLS rule to essentially reset the number of days-on-market.
The place is way, way overpriced. It should be more like $2M before it gets any serious eyeballs.
The MLS listing *should* be a realistic reflection of current status, so maybe there are contingencies involved that have legitimately kept it pending all this while? Commercial financing is a booger these days.
I highly, highly doubt it. The attempts at selling this place have all the markings of a desperate realtor trying everything. In 2 years it’s been through six MLS numbers, pending twice, and the delisted/relisted trick a few times.
Meanwhile, other places in the area have cleared escrow after a few weeks. Nope, sorry. This is a place that’s chasing the high-end market downward.
I believe MLS listings re-set after 90 days.
Lots of people have been using that loophole these days. Smart buyers can see right through these things. The trick only fools unsuspecting dopes who are from outside a given area.
Many times there was no “pending sale”. The agent just changes the listing to make it look like a sale fell through rather than admit the house wouldn’t sell at the desired price. Then, 90 days later, spring buying season rolls around and they can relist with a new MLS # and prospective buyers (naive ones) don’t realize the house has been listed for sale for months/years.
Please. You’re flying by the seat of your pants here, AFF. There are all kinds of checks & balances & agents don’t get to go manipulate scenarios all willy nilly.
This “90 days” you’ve mentioned twice now? WTH are you talking about; do you think that there is one time frame & one time frame only for listing agreements?
I’m guessing that you will also insist that RE commission is 6% …
You assume people are ethical.
90 days is a reference to the MLS procedures for whether a new listing is eligible to get a new number or not. If you wait a certain amt of time and then re-list the same property (as determined by tax ID) it will get a new MLS number. I’m no sure it’s 90 days, but there is a timeframe and I remember it being about 90 days.
I don’t have time to Google b/c I’m staffed on a big project. But here’s a start – http://www.trulia.com/voices/Home_Buying/Why_does_the_MLS_show_a_property_as_a_new_listing_-190236
The significance of a new listing is that it obscurs the fact the seller has been trying to unload the property for an extended period of time.
The other benefit of having a listing appear as “new” is that “new” listings get many times more interest from prospective buyers.
As for flying by the seat of my pants, just no.
AFF, I don’t have to google … I listed & sold RE for eight years, always as an MLS member.
Properties have Tax ID’s? News to me. Properties have Lot & Block #’s as determined by Plat maps. Brokers have Tax ID’s.
One broker’s listing on a property can expire today & be listed tomorrow w/ another broker, thus generating a new listing MLS # (assuming ea participate in MLS) & the beauty of MLS is that a cross-reference system independent of MLS #’s-only exists — it ain’t but a thing to find listing history of any property that’s ever been in an MLS database — granted, a seller’s agent may not readily divulge that info so as to avoid conveying a seller’s desperation, fiduciary duty & all that, but all a potential buyer has to do is ask.
Agents / Brokers of MLS have time-constraints they have to honor RE: active listings & status changes — sure, there are unethical ones oyut there, but one only has to screw that up but a time or two before losing MLS privileges.
“new” listings get many times more interest from prospective buyers.
Actually not true — agents know which properties have been stale on the mkt & don’t waste much time w/ ‘em until & unless they’re priced competitively, because if a seller isn’t realistic, they’re wasting everyone’s time.
I said naive buyers from outside the area. People not working with a sharp agent/broker. This is who they’re trying to fool. And you’re right, it almost never works.
I see the MLS “new listing” trick all the time, often from the same small circle of agents. It’s pretty laughable.
Brayella– you have to understand, in the Westside LA real estate market, both agents are usually conspiring against the buyer in order to make the sale. Unless the buyer is really on the ball, looking online, and doing a lot of research, the shady tactics come out in full force. A buyer’s agent won’t willfully divulge MLS data at all.
C&B, just out of curiosity, when you say Buyer’s Agent, are you merely referring to the agent who showed the buyer the property, or are you referring to a formal agreement that the buyer is paying that agent’s commission?
Reason I ask is because if the seller is the only one paying commission to both agents, then both agents *are* working for the seller, in the seller’s best interest.
Both scenarios, doesn’t matter.
Okay, I’ve got a question for you smart ones re: real estate. My good friend bought a sweet place in LA but it was when prices were soaring. Her buyer’s agent never gave her the appraisal amount and she just assumed it must have appraised for the amount she was paying. She ended up finding out when she had to sell it that is appraised at 10% less than what she bought it for which was a big chunk of change and made the difference between it being a regular sale and a short sale because the market tanked and she had to sell it for so much less.
Does she have a case? Her issue is less what she lost b/c she can get some back in tax losses (it was a rental) but more so that her credit is ruined. On the other hand she feels stupid for not knowing enough to ask this question of her mortgage broker and buyer’s agent.
Malf, I don’t see how she didn’t get a copy of the appraisal, & I’d bet that there’s one in her loan pkg w/ her initials on it (people tend to get slightly overwhelmed w/ all the paperwork that the title co gives at closing & initial away because they feel dumb asking questions at that point in the game) — also, if the appraisal came in low, her financing was likely restructured, so again, I’m hard-pressed to see how this got by her.
What I can think of that may have happened, unbeknownst to her, is if the appraisal district lowered the valuation (my area does that every two years) — that’s a different appraisal than the lender’s appraisal, it’s not something you can take to the bank, but the mkt tanking would have the same effect, regardless.
Whether she has a case or not an atty would have to say, but I’m doubtful. There may be recourse for her if she tried to get the lender to work w/ her & they declined, but again, she needs to ask an atty.
Sorry about her situation
OT: Finally tried out jp’s Brussels sprouts recipe while staying at my parents place and my mom loved it so much, I just got a sad little email from my dad about how he had to eat “those” Brussels sprouts twice this week already.
I DESTROY MARRIAGES!!!!
Nah. I am pretty sure he has already complain-bragged to his colleagues about the fancy-crazy way his wife puts pears in his vegetables.
I’ve never actually sublet before, but isn’t it standard to ask to take a look at the original lease? That way the potential sublettor would be aware of exactly what the landlord’s requirements are for tenancy. I’m assuming this is an illegal sublet, but wouldn’t any rational person ask to see a lease just to see what the real rent is/what utilities are/parking/etc?
If anyone rents this place without doing so, they kind of deserve what they get.
I don’t know about seeing the original lease, that’s not really anyone else’s business, but the landlord needs to be a part of the sublet lease, I should think. I sure wouldn’t enter into one otherwise.
If for no other reason, the landlord needs to know who is living there to make sure zoning and HOA rules are not violated. Another big reason is property insurance.
Is it a sublet situation, or just another roommate?
even if it’s just another roommate, they need to be added to the lease.
Not necessarily. A lot of old school landlords are lax with leases, as long as the situation is approved of and transparent. JA’s problem is that she acts like she’s being shady even when she’s actually not, so I doubt her landlord would be cool with someone moving in w/o a lease.
Delurking to say you would have to be fucking INSANE to pay $3200 for ONE lousy bedroom with two roommates and a dog. I don’t know what the real estate market is like in Marina Del Bray, but I live in a “cool” part of Brooklyn and I rent a duplex with a private roofdeck for less than that.
Asking 3k+ for a ROOMMATE isn’t just weird, it’s mindbending fucking insanity. I don’t know a single person who lives with roommates who pays more than $1800, and that’s for truly amazing places. Also – who on earth would find this listing appealing? College kids with generous dad$ers would prefer to either be on their own or rent a big place with a bunch of people THEIR AGE so they can party. Normal working professionals wouldn’t want to live with a crazy couple and their dog in a place they can’t even furnish to their liking.
what.the.fuck. She is deranged.
It’s HYSTERICAL!!! If you have $3200 to rent, you ain’t gonna have 2 room mates or even one room mate. People who have room mates do it to save money. $3200 can get you some sweet digs in LA. Also, you can get into a rent control situation and certainly any neighborhood you want.
OT: Anybody seen the ugly Zuckling’s new facebook profile picture?
I am evil robot from a 1950′s B-movie and I will destroy you, bzzt bzzt
WTF, is she kidding, please let her be kidding.
HOW DARE YOU REPOST THAT OUTSIDE OF FACEBOOK!
Erm, PRIVACY!!!!!
lol
Digital etiquette: always ask permission before posting a friend’s photo publicly. It’s not about privacy settings, it’s about human decency.
Hahahah, do you think she felt as stupid as she should have while typing that one? I am shocked that all the picture posting human decency agencies didn’t clamor to do a $20,000 a plate dinner to aid RZ’s plight.
Was she at a “Go As An Old Picture of Your Mum” costume party?
lol and that sounds like a great idea for a costume party, actually.
I dig the photo! And more power to her if she purposely posed in it as a tribute a 1950s highschool yearbook photo.
I would be nervous getting my dick near those chompers. Probably ask for the handjob?
jk. maybe risk it if she swallows.
I do think Randi’s choppers are looking 100% better these days. And she might be just having some fun with the whole “1960 yearbook photo” thing for her Facebook profile.
Her “Silicon Valley” reality TV show still sucks though..
How bad must it have been before that she had to put it in black & white?
^ what I think every time I see a b&w photo
Wow. Just, wow.
The Talking Tina doll from that episode of The Twilight Zone really let herself go.
Still not a patch on the Dutchess of Cambridge’s recent royal portrait:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2013/jan/11/duchess-of-cambridge-portrait-emsley
“Randi, we listened to that Streisand girl from Brooklyn and we listened to you — congratulations, you get the recording contract!!”
I really think this chick is “special.”. I’ve always thought that, and this pic really just Confirms it.
Wow. She is just really, really sad now.
Why does she always highlight these LONG conversations. She does it all the time. Is it to prove she has friends?
Julia Allison @JuliaAllison 1d
xoxox
@JuliaPriceMusic – loved our 3 hour fireside chat tonight. No more Enya for at least a week though LOL
She thinks “having friends” makes her special. It’s odd and she’s been doing it for years.
did she just write a blind item about herself in her own roommate ad? i think her high opinion of her humor/importance is the saddest thing of all..
“A bit about me: I am a 31-year-old tv and print journalist. I moved into this place, which is (frankly) way above my budget a year and a half ago, because I had a (cough) reality show on a certain rather infamous network. Not MTV. “
The FB post accompanying this is hilarious. “You can move in whenever, stay for however long or short you want…even five minutes please god pay me even for five minutes.” How does someone with not enough money rent a billon dollar a month apartment? I seriously do not understand. I can see if you didn’t have a lot of money and could no longer afford your $1200 a month place, because you lost a modest paying job. But why fuck do you rent a $5000+ a month place you clearly cannot afford???? What fucking planet is this chick from? What a nightmare of a person she is. Her parents should have reigned this shit in years ago. Have fun supporting her and her gay future husband and their creepy children because clearly neither of them will ever earn an honest living.
There’s gotta be some backstory. I mean did Bravo agree to pay for it during the show and she just assumed she’d be able to grift it for the rest of the time??? Because clearly she could not be on tv unless she was portrayed living in a fancy place way above her budget. God forbid all twelve viewers see her as a relatable person in a normal person’s living quarters. Stupid whore.
ALso triple jfa’ing myself to say…now it becomes clear why the two desperate weirdos fawned so hard over Amber. “ACT EXCITED WHEN SHE GETS HERE HONEY THIS IS OUR MEAL TICKET.” With their stupid signs like 5 year olds. Bitch still peaced after five minutes lol.
I think she played that like a ball player being called up to the majors for a week thinking he was going to be there a lifetime. Bravo crushed her pink dreams.
The production company leased it through May 2012, then she renewed the lease because she was a) flush with whatever installment of her $25,000 she’d gotten, and b) confident that Amurrica would love her and she’d be signed at a higher rate for a second season, endorsement deals pouring in, a line of Donkey Girl cocktail mixers being developed, etc., etc.
We see how well this worked out for her.
These are the same delusions she’s been harboring since her one contract with Star. I cannot tell you how many people laughed and laughed at what a failure she quickly became, after treating people like shit when she thought she was on the cusp of becoming a major celebrity. I remember some aside she made (I think it was in one of her dopey videos) when she moved in her last NY apartment, something about how it was close to Fox News. She assumed she was going to get a full-time job there, just as her (more talented and attractive, not to mention personable and hard working) predecessor had done, and acted like a total bitch to people there. She even managed to blow her chance to make nice with the marquee anchor there, by blogging something embarrassing about him.
This paragraph pretty much sums up her entire existence. Entitled twat feels entitled.
The best part is that she is devoid of any talent, has no work ethic, and thought she’d continue to get by on (the limited) looks she had then. The way she flaunted her delusional sense of inevitability made for more than a little reveling in her downfall.
I entered the basement during the Miss Advised era, so maybe someone can shed some light on how we know she has money from grandma? Sounds like something she’d brag about but may have really only been the nightgown and Chanel handbag were passed on, just curious.
We don’t really know if/how much $$ she got from the late NGMB. She did seem to have a cash influx in the late summer/early fall that has since dried up (Burning Man, trip to Peru).
I think the reports of NGMB’s fabulous wealth were always greatly exaggerated. Even after Pettifogger and his sister sell the house (Zillow says ca. $500,000) there are a lot of heirs: Pettifogger and Aunt Vic, and Julie’s brother and her cousins. That’s not including any charitable bequests, either.
No “fuck you” money is coming Julie’s way until her parents die, unless she earns it herself (HA!)
Not that getting a tax-free $50,000 or $100,000 wouldn’t be an enormous windfall to me, and I imagine it would be to most people here! But Julie would (or will) just piss it away in a matter of months on nothing, and be left with nothing but a pile of smelly too-small pink clothing.
It’s an enormous windfall to most people, but it’s not “fuck you money.” Even if someone were to take a hypothetical $100K inheritance and invest it wisely and safely, there is no way to live off of that for more than a year or so.
I’m also not convinced that she’ll have FUM after her parents pass away. For one thing, if they had that kind of money, they would’ve bought her way into Stanford, then they would’ve bought her an apartment in NY or whichever city she wanted to annoy, as Meghan Asha’s parents did.
You can live off $100k for a year if you’re not Julia “instant gratification” Allison
I could live off of $100k for three years.
She’ll have reasonable fuck-you money unless Pettifogger and Mama Bird need extended care/assisted living or similar—both the OMG lake house and the OMG downtown condo are valued at upwind of a million, and Chicago real estate prices are likely to keep pace with inflation or better. Plus the lake house next door. So when the parentsers go West, she and Britt will split at least the equivalent of a couple million plus in today’s money. Which will be likely to still be “screw you” money, if not out-and-out “fuck you” money.
Through the kindness and forward thinking of my late grandmother, I received a tax free $100k sa couple of years. My grandmother was by no means rich but planned well. The money came after the sale of her house (which frankly I’d have inherited since I loved it so much) and took a long time to kick in.
I used it for a down payment on my house and my post-graduate education to honor my grandmother’s spirit and her hopes and faith in me.
The money was gone within months and I’m struggling financially as much as I was before.
Yet I still get accused of being a trust fund baby when I even mention my grandmother’s generosity and gift (which I have to when folk wonder why I own a house as a poor student), and it drives me crazy.
I dunno what I’m trying to say except for maybe these kinds of inheritances don’t last long whether you spend them wisely or irresponsibly. And I seriously doubt Julia will be investing in a home or education .
Also, I have that damn flu. So get yr shots.
I’m thinking that the Boogers may be “house rich, cash poor.” Years ago, I knew people whose families had huge houses (that were worth far more in the 80s than the Boogers’ homes are worth now), but weren’t exactly elaborate inside. Just like the Boogers’ homes, the decor was incredibly sparse and almost antiseptic-looking.
Also, if Donkey and Britt inherit the homes (and we’re assuming a 50-50 split), there’s no guarantee they’ll be able to sell them, depending on market conditions.
Do we have any idea if there are mortgages (or second mortgages) on these homes?
Jordache, the difference is that you’ve invested in two very valuable things that will pay off for you in many ways over the years.
I don’t know what your field is, but I’m sure your education will help you be employed and advance in an actual career. And a home where you’ll live for many years is always a wise thing.
Donkey, in contrast, always pisses away whatever money falls into her stinky lap. An obscenely overpriced rental and trips with her slack-jawed idiot of a lesbian boyfriend are how she typically wastes it.
Her “plans for the future” are always the same: take whatever small opportunity is given to her, fuck it up, then assume that more is going to be handed to her.
From assuming that going from the Star job to full-time at Fox News was her birthright, to actually believing that MisShapen would make her America’s Sweetheart and guarantee her a second season and all sorts of mega endorsement deals, Dumb Donkey never learns.
And, at the end of this tl;dr, I hope you feel better soon!
I agree. Jordache investing in a home is much smarter and more mature decision than opting to blow $6,200/month renting an apartment for a relatively short amount of time.
thank you!!! I didn’t even buy an expensive house, just put 50 percent down to reduce my monthly payments. And relocated from DC to Baltimore to get the most for my money (DC real eatate, even a studio, is unfathomable). Graduate school is not paying off yet (I got an MFA in Grpahic Design, and have student loans) but at least I own a beautiful two hundred year old house in a part of Baltimore which has a future. thanks for the encouraging words!
Putting 50% down is SO smart! I did the same thing last year, when I bought an apartment in Manhattan. I could’ve gotten a bigger place and stretched things with a smaller downpayment, but now my mortgage + maintenance charges are less than what I was paying each month for a rent-stabilized apartment.
Also, I don’t know about Marina del Bray, but in NY, the super expensive rentals are generally for actors, musicians, etc., and high-level business people who are only going to be here for a specific period of time and want to live in luxury (but not in a hotel), and have no interest in buying a place. Not for dumb donkeys who think they’re going to live like that forever.
Can you even hear yourself @fucktard fashion failure (testicle dust that dissipated into the wind (Queen Neferteeri))?
You could only make 100k last a year?
Oh you only had 50% to put down on a apt in Manhattan?
So what the fuck were you doing taking up a rent stabilized place then? Some poor might have needed that.
Seriously half you rich kid cunts here sound exactly like Julia. Tone deaf, spoilt, clueless.
@shutupcunt: She did what was in her means, which by the sound of it seems like she’s doing pretty well.
I too am a poor, but don’t be jealous dude. If Queen Neferteeri worked for it, more power to her. Good for her.
Wow. shutupcunt is truly an appropriate name for you.
You are really quite stupid and incapable of reading. You also have no clue what people who come into a few bucks actually do with the money. The smart thing, especially for losers in life who’ll never make much on their own, is to invest it and try to live off the interest, and not the principle. Then again, those unfortunate souls who’ll never make anything of themselves — like you and Donkey — may have no choice but to eat up the principle as fast as possible.
Where did I complain about “only” having 50% to put down on an apartment? Again, your pathetic lack of education has failed you, as I clearly agreed with Jordache that it’s a smart strategy to not overextend oneself when buying a home.
You a total moron who obviously know nothing about NYC real estate, or what rent stabilization involves.
I’m sorry that you’re such a bitter and jealous turd. Go fuck yourself, you pathetic loser. Try to educate and make something of yourself instead attacking those who have.
@shutupcunt Money is relative, a fortune to me is someone else’s loose change, and I think it’s just as unnattractive to talk about $100k like it’s nothing as it is to criticize someone else’s expenditures. But then again I’m just a povvy living in brooklyn
I haven’t seen anybody refer to $100K as “loose change,” or like it’s nothing. It’s just basic reality that most people can only live a year or two off of that, and then what? Live off it for 2 years, and then what do you have?
$100K (if Donkey even got anywhere near that, and that’s debatable) will not buy Donkey a lavish lifestyle, at least not for much more than a year or so. And investing it and trying to live off the interest will mean a rather spartan life.
If you (the generic you) use it for something like paying off a big debt that’s holding you back or for solid longterm goals (like Jordache did), then it’s not wasted. But live off for a year or two? Then what? Unless you have a bunch of rich grandparents about to die, you’re right back where you started.
Why isn’t her boyfriend moving in with her or does she mostly stay at his place??