Donkey: Annoying and Horrifying People Around The World

My niece goes to university in Canada. She and her five housemates have stumbled upon “Miss Advised” on the E! network there. Over the past few weeks, here are some of the texts I have received from these former Donkey virgins (my niece is well-advised re: Miss Advised, and told them to text me, the Donkey Expert):

Who is this lunatic? Why did she get a show?? What is wrong with her?”

“I’m dying, OMG. What is WRONG with this chick?”

“Begging that poor dude to kiss her. What the FUCK?”

“She is MENTAL.”

“OMG, she just announced she blew that dude. Who says that on TV??? Who?????”

“What a desperate lunatic!”

“She’s so pathetic, it’s difficult to watch. Please, someone get her some serious psychiatric help.”

“I am literally screaming at the TV watching her rolling around on the floor for this dude she’s been out with once. Holy shit!!! Why did they give a crazy person a show? They should have put her in a mental institution!”

“‘THE REAL ME IS A PROM GIRL???!??!?!’ How OLD is this chick? Holy shit!”

“Holy fuck, her voice is annoying.”

“I can’t watch this any longer. It is too disturbing.”

“She is literally bat-shit crazy.”

“THIS IS FUCKED!”

 

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129 Responses to Donkey: Annoying and Horrifying People Around The World

  1. Grifty Shades of Bray says:

    Can’t wait for the RBD episode to hit.

  2. Albie Quirky says:

    She is a cautionary tale for ALL THE GIRLS.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      I confess to feeling real delight that girls in their early 20s are utterly appalled by her.

      • Queen Neferteeri says:

        True joy is remembering when she was at her peak (around the time of “Star” mag) and how she really believed that she was on the cusp of being a major star — and treated everyone beneath her like shit.

        Donkey really believed she was about to become such a major celebrity and that young women such as these would find her aspirational.

      • Barking Mad, Intel Advisor says:

        I’ve been watching her twitter since it started running here and I haven’t seen new fangirls tweeting at her either.

        I did have a funny crossover moment. Occasionally I hear a promo for the show, just one line mixed with a bunch of other shows. It’s a talking head of Donkey saying she is the most hated person on the Internet. I was dialing my phone one day and I heard Julia and I DROPPED THE PHONE!

        • Jack the Bulldog says:

          Stunned silence.

        • Zandra says:

          Well done, Barksie, well done.

        • FIEIRCE Mani (pedi) says:

          Hahaha amazing. Juliar is radio silent, and so coincidentally are her fans.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            Interesting … Mass Despised is currently airing in Canada, right, but D0nkey isn’t garnering fans in the ‘stans by the tens of thousands daily?

            I’d thought she was at 136k, but her follower count is at 134k now. How great would it be if Twitter was knocingd down all of Julia Allison’s bought-&-paid for fakes?

      • sausage curls/fingers says:

        I’m very early 20s and I think she’s haggard. A big part of the laughs for me is knowing I’d never act like such a twit even though she’s a full decade older than me. The prom stuff and her behavior around guys truly does seem juvenile, even to us.

    • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

      I was considering leaving this exact comment.

  3. Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

    ah, the successful international syndication for which Dad$ers shelled out the big bucks.

    OT
    julia is in peru and the internet is boring. what sites/cites/sights are you catladies frequenting these days, for fun/gossip/snark/procrastination? need recommendations.

  4. i.just.cant! says:

    i always come here for advice not just for lulz. uhm so here’s a dilemma- i think i’ve mentioned a while ago to you catladies that i’m pregnant. my dog (little and cute, reminiscent of lilly, 6 yrs old). there’s been extra affection between me and my husband and the dog does not approve. last night he bit me. my face, actually. bad enough that i needed stitches. i love him to pieces and don’t want to ignore him but am now so scared of him. i’m not a cesar millan militant type and generally don’t approve of his what i think is harsh training but i know i need to (wo)man up and make sure the pup knows i’m boss and not him. i hoped that he and the soon to be addition to our family will be BFFs but now i’m not sure if he should even be near the baby.

    i know how you all love animals and advice would be much appreciated.

    • i.just.cant! says:

      wtf. the ‘my dog’ sentence was supposed to read- my dog (little and cute, reminiscent of lilly, 6 yrs old) has been aggressive lately.

    • 11th Wang says:

      God! How horrifying and heartbreaking. I’m so sorry. I’ve spent a few years as a dogwalker (and am a dog owner) and I feel like I’ve seen it all. I can try to help.

      Can you describe the situation in which yr dog bit you? Also, does the dog listen to / respect one of you more than the other?

      I won’t judge, promise!

      • i.just.cant! says:

        our dog definitely respects my husband more than me. i’m not really sure why because i’m the one who’s with him all day. okay so the biting incident- we were getting ready for bed, was giving my husband a foot rub and i noticed that the dog was giving me “eff you looks.” uhm that part could be my imagination. i was tucking them both in, kissed my husband and went to kiss the dog and he lunged. he usually gives us ‘warning growls’ when he just doesn’t want to be touched/nuzzled/whatev, but this time he just bit and bit hard. he pierced through my nasal fold and lip. i had blood running down my pajamas and all over the hall.

        haaalp. how do i fix everything? well, really, myself so that i can handle him better?

        • Jacy says:

          Was he ashamed after he did it — did he show remorse?
          I have a naturally self-loathing dog, so when she does anything nasty, she is very ashamed of herself, and remembers it well if anyone gives her serious hell.

          Is he that type?

          Is there any way to call in a doggie whisperer?

          • Prom Part Burn Out says:

            Go comando parenting on your dog… pet parents hate doing this but your dog will actually be much happier when put in her place. Also, your dog will be well trained in time for baby, which will be necessary for the two to co-exist. No. 1 No dog on bed or sofa or anywhere near your face. No. 2 get a create with some comfy bedding (or get crate back out if you already have one). No 3 no toys or treats or bones lying around the house. Remember, you and your hubby are the pack leaders and your dog is just a member of your house hold. Dog must earn every special benefit. Treats only when commands are obeyed. Toys only during excersise time. During feeding time, see how food aggressive she is. If any aggression exists, feed in crate.

          • Prom Part Burn Out says:

            Leave crate open and available at all times. Give tons of praise if doggy voluntarily goes in crate to rest. Crate should be a simulated “dog den”. When resting, dogs actually like relatively small spaces. Let her dig in there, shed in there, get her sent all over her den. During periods of over-excitement or negative behavior (barking or aggressive play) put dog calmly in crate. Do not yell or lecture. Just put her in her den to calm down. If she is still excited b/c she can see you through the crate, cover the door/windows with a blanket.

          • Prom Part Burn Out says:

            When baby comes, you’ll have to always attend needs of baby before needs of the dog. Make it clear from day one, baby is dominant over doggie. When you can’t juggle both at the same time, doggie goes in crate until baby is settled. When baby becomes toddler, integrate the kid into training. Teach kid commands and maybe have kid involved in feeding. The person who controls the food is king in a dog’s eyes! Good luck! It is very hard not to cave and treat a dog like a “baby” or person b/c you think this treatment is mean. A dog that bites will not fit into your new family, and will most likely be euthanized if you take it to a shelter.

          • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

            Prom part: this is really good advice. You know your stuff.

          • Sausage Snappers says:

            Prom has the right way of it. You are the boss, and dogs like being bossed around tbh.

            Ignore dem haters below.

    • Miss Mix a Lot says:

      I don’t have advice, but I just read that hormonal/pheromone changes during pregnancy can change the way pets react to their female owners. So maybe that has something to do with it? At least a reason.

    • stalker says:

      I would never again trust a dog that bit me and I would not have it in the house with a baby. This might be tough for you to hear but I would have that dog put down.

      • yikes says:

        Put down??? Jesus Christ. At the very worst you can find a person/family with no kids that the dog could go to.

        • stalker says:

          Sorry, but a dog that would bite a person is not worth keeping alive.

          • CDB says:

            I am glad I never bit you growing up. (or did I?)

          • Mazen Middlebury says:

            This is a (bad) schtick, correct?

          • muppet mug says:

            Uhhhh, I disrespectfully disagree. It is a small dog who can most definitely be trained. All animals are unpredictable – you do not just kill one because it bit in an act of possible fear, jealousy etc. It is a living creature who deserves the proper attention and training to curb bad habits.

          • bitchface says:

            wow, Stalker. Just… wow.

          • stalker says:

            *shrug*

            A dog is not a person. People can possibly be rehabilitated. A dog? There are other dogs.

          • yikes says:

            And you get on Jaba for being cruel to her dog??? Crawling up on a dog and putting your face in it’s space and then you should KILL it for reacting? Yeah, that’s logical.

            The poor dog is clearly upset, it didn’t run up and bite her face for no reason unprovoked. It can most definitely be corrected. It’ll take time and patience and consistency.

            “There are other dogs”…wow. Just wow. It’s a living thing…not a used dishrag. You’re disgusting.

          • stalker says:

            well, that’s what babies DO, they crawl up on dogs and startle them and surprise them and get in their space and their food.

            Life is tough. Bad things happen. Times are stressful. Nobody in my house from human to animal would be allowed to be a threat to me or my children.

            But, you know, y’all can continue to clutch your pearls and carry on.

          • LickedRandisCake says:

            I love how when you see the tide is overwhelmingly against you, we all are branded pearl clutchers.

            Babies who are being watched should not be crawling in to a dog’s food. Dogs who are being watched around babies, should not have an opportunity to bite them. Maybe we should just kill all babies. They seem to be a real problem.

          • stalker says:

            I don’t feel the tide is overwhelmingly against me. I don’t really care if y’all agree with me or not.

            and you CLEARLY don’t have kids if you think you can watch an active baby and a bitey dog every second.

            It’s just a risk I would not take for me and my family. Baby > dog. Me > dog.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            Yeah, sorry LRC, but the only opinions you have here are those that have been voiced.

            If a stranger asks any of you to volunteer your newborn to gauge the reaction of a dog who’s already bit its owner, would you agree to do so because hey, cute little doggie looks like Lilly! ?

            This is stupid. No one here is qualified to make an assessment of a dog that they’ve never even laid eyes on.

          • LickedRandisCake says:

            Generalize and assume much? We are all pearl clutchers. Clearly I can’t be a mother. Any dog ever who bites should be put to death.

            I am a mother, and managed to raise my son with two dogs AND a pool/spa in the backyard. So far, he’s made it to the ripe old age of 24 so I think I did ok. I can guarantee you one thing, he was watched well enough that he never crawled around in the dog’s food. Why would he? Dogs should be fed at particular times, bowls left for 10 minutes or so (if the food lasts that long, it never has with our dogs) and then the bowls picked up until the next feeding. Though, we trained our dogs so that we could stick our hands in their food WHILE they were eating and not react to it.

            I did have a dog that snapped at a child who had thrust herself in his face upon meeting him and, guess what? That dog was never allowed to meet anyone again without being strictly monitored by myself or my husband. He was restrained when strangers entered the home and until they were introduced to him appropriately, kept on a short leash when we took him for walks, and we did not allow children to lunge themselves at him during those walks. If petting was allowed during walks, we held his head and allowed body petting only. He never had snapped at a child before, and never did again. Who knows? Maybe he was feeling sick that day. Maybe the last thing he wanted was some kid stuffing her face in his. But, once something like that happens, YES, you need to take major precautions. That’s what responsible pet owners and parents do.

            It is certainly your choice not to have a dog who has had one instance of aggression around your family. It’s completely understandable, in fact. But to say that the only answer to such a situation is to put the dog who does it down is ridiculous. That may sometimes be the answer in particularly hard cases (such as dogs who have been raised and conditioned to fight), but not always. There are wonderful rescue operations out there who take animals in and work with them. Giving them the discipline, training, time, love and affection that you would not.

            Pet ownership is not for everyone.

          • LickedRandisCake says:

            Brayella,

            I have no idea what you mean. The only opinions I have are the only ones that have been voiced? Does that mean I can’t agree with things that have been said by others?

            I originally said two things. Just because we disagree does not make us all pearl clutchers and that putting every dog who has ever bitten someone one time is an overreaction.

            No, I wouldn’t volunteer my newborn to gauge a dog’s aggression level. Is that the way it is? If I don’t agree with death for the dog, then I must be advocating throwing babies in pens with snarling German Shepherd’s and seeing how that shakes out?

            I’m allowed to have an opinion just as everyone else is and, considering that you have an opinion on EVERYTHING that anybody has ever said on this site, ever, I think it’s pretty lame to rag on me for having one. I don’t call you out every time you make a comment. In fact, I rarely comment at all even though I’ve been here just as long as you have.

            And you are right, nobody is qualified. Neither Stalker, nor myself. We were asked for opinions and we gave them. If you don’t like the subject matter, then move on.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            I could have worded that better, sorry — what I meant is that possibly a larger percentage of people would agree w/ putting the dog down & you wouldn’t know it if they don’t voice that sentiment — most likely, people here don’t have an opinion to venture because they acknowledge that it’s not their expertise.

            I’m not ragging on you for having an opinion, so retract your claws already, eh?

            I’m ‘ragging on’, if that’s what you want to call it, OP for turning to unqualified strangers on the internet — just like you wouldn’t subject your infant to the company of a dog who’s shown aggression, neither should OP, but there are multiple paragraphs above ‘instructing’ her on integrating her face-chewing dog w/ her eventual baby. WTF?

            Shit. For starters, how about taking the dog to a vet to see if it’s in sick &/or in pain? Find out from a vet how to proceed next, not RBD.

          • LickedRandisCake says:

            Ah, I see. Then I apologize for taking my claws out before you’d had a chance to clarify what you meant.

            I will say that we don’t know that everybody on here is unqualified. Maybe there are some vets and dog trainers who could intelligently speak to the issue. Would the dog still need to be assessed in person by a professional? Of course.

            We have people on here all the time who expound on myriad topics they aren’t qualified to expound on. How many times have we seen JA armchair diagnosed on here? Is everyone who does it in the mental health field? If the standard for voicing an opinion is that high, everyone should stop discussing what JA has injected in to her face, how much work she’s had done, etc. If we aren’t all plastic surgeons…..

            I think it’s pretty evident that everybody can agree that baby comes first and I’m sure the OP knows that. My point with Stalker was that not every dog who lashes out needs to be automatically put down. I agree with another poster, the dog could simply be placed with a family without children. The choice does not have to be between baby mauling or doggy heaven.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            I get what you’re saying, LCR, but I see the two as apples & oranges — being unqualified to call a cray-cray d0nkey ‘cray-cray’ doesn’t have the same potential as does being unqualified & causing someone to follow advice that may result in actual physical harm.

            Highlights cherry-picked from an animal hospital site that contradict advice given above:

            Dog Behavior Problems – Aggression to Family Members

            Euthanasia for aggression is the only guarantee a dog will not be aggressive again.

            According to the CDC, 800,000 people seek medical attention for dog bites each year, half of which are children

            Once a dog bites, he has shown his willingness to use biting as a behavioral strategy at least in that situation and therefore is more likely to bite. Dogs that are willing to use aggression to change the outcome of a situation are rarely cured again.

            Don’t we just need to show our dog that we are alpha or dominant for the aggression to stop?
            Aggression toward family members is not likely to be related to dominance or social status. This is a common misconception, which can lead to inappropriate treatment strategies and perhaps worsening of the aggressive behavior. … training programs designed to enforce the human family members as alpha or dominance using confrontation or intimidation-based interventions will increase rather than decrease anxiety and associated aggressive responses.

            Certain family situations may make it impossible to safely rehabilitate an aggressive dog and keep people from harm. Each case requires an assessment with a veterinary behaviorist and ongoing follow up to determine if progress is being made

            TL;DR = see a veterinary behaviorist

          • LickedRandisCake says:

            This made me chuckle. Not at you. But that euthanasia is the only guarantee a dog will not be aggressive again. Um, yeah. Duh! Euthanasia is the only guarantee a dog won’t ever do anything again.

            Abstinence is the only guarantee I won’t get an STD too but, since I don’t plan on being celibate the rest of my damn life, there are other things I can do to greatly lessen the chance of getting one.

            No, really. I do see what you are saying. I do. Having had a dog who snapped once, though, I know there are things that can be done to modify behavior and risk. But it does take time, effort and attention and as I mentioned, not every pet owner is up to that task. I see too many people think pets are just going to be all giggles and rainbows, then immediately put them in a yard and rarely interact with them again. Because dogs shed! And drool! And need to be housetrained! Again I say, yeah, duh!

            That all said, I would also take the type of dog into consideration. If I had a small dog who had an episode, I’d be more worried about a reoccurrence. Small dogs are actually more aggressive and harder to train the aggressiveness out of. My experience has been with larger dogs.

          • bitchface says:

            Do us all a favor and don’t ever get a fucking dog, stalker.

            unbelievable… kill it. Why are dogs less worthy of life than other living beings – just because our brains are larger? “There are other dogs.” What a bitch. You and your “logic” is the reason the shelters are overflowing with dogs and 4-6Million put down per year.

            Ok that’s enough for me. This has been a fun ride for several years, and many of you cat ladies are awesome, but Jaba is boring and sad now, and I hope she has a great life grifting through it. She’ll always fall “up” and nothing will change but she’s too boring now. Hope to see many of you awesome writers / funny people on other cites/sights/sites. Peace out (except you, stalker, dog killer).

          • stalker says:

            Bitchface, I have a dog, I adopted it from an OMGSHELTER and he’s never even come close to biting me.

            As for the rest of you motherfuckers, I am not up in your house killing your pets so step the fuck off. I am just saying WHAT I WOULD DO.

            And yes you are a bunch of pearl-clutchers if you think that me giving MY OPINION is the same thing as advocating KILLING ALL THE DOGS.

    • Greg says:

      Congratulations on your pregnancy! I hope your face feels better soon.

      I don’t have a dog or advice but I am an animal lover and I feel terrible for you. Good luck.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      i always come here for advice

      My advice: This isn’t one for the internet.

  5. ethel-egg says:

    check out victoria stillwell. she’s an english dog trainer who I think is much better than that Cesar guy. It’s just repetition, repetition, repetition with dogs & you’ve got to be consistent, I learnt that the hard way cos I let my dog get into bad habits when he was a pup. It’s boring but gotta be done if he or she is going to be able to stay once the baby comes. You can’t have a dog that you are scared of, even if you can punt it across the room with your foot. Which is why I now have cats.

    Not that I ever punted my dog across the room! Just that he was frustrating & really naughty & wouldn’t heed commands. He lived to 18 & was as flighty as a pup to the end. sigh. I miss that little schnauzer fucker.

    • ethel-egg says:

      derr. Supposed to be reply to i.just.cant above. Sorry peeps.

      • i.just.cant! says:

        ooh i do like her. we are looking into different trainers now. your schnauzer (rip) sounds just like MY little asshole of a dog. (i mean that fondly). obvs still love him like crazy but am now just more cautious. thanks everyone for all the helpful suggestions. and the pheromones during pregnancy thing is interesting! my dog is used to sick people- ie we would bring him over to our family friend who was dying (she was 93) and he would lie on top of her and she’d pet him for extended periods. and my husband has kidney surgery every yearish with a nephrostomy tube attached to him and the dog would be SO very careful with him.

        will keep everyone updated on how he’s doing! oh and my face hurts like crazy. i look like a domestic abuse victim.

      • Prom Party Burn Out says:

        Its “Prom Party Burn Out” but I was so anxious and wanting to help last nite, I typoed! I’ve had experience with a dog who couldn’t tolorate fats and so would feel horrible, growl, and be ornery 24-7. Part of the solution was comando training and the other part was diet. Maybe get your dog checked out at the vet for sore limbs, infected wounds, maybe even a blood pannel to make sure everything is ok. A dog in pain will be twice as agressive as normal.

        Oh and of course you will need a trainer to help you with commands. Watching trainers like Victoria Stilwell is very good. Try to watch episodes with a single dog living with a family as opposed to a bunch of dogs in a home. In those episodes, she has to spend half the time focusing on pack dynamics between the dogs, which isn’t relevant in your situation. Also, Jackson Galaxy on “My Cat from Hell” on Animal Planet is very good. Dogs with dominance issues have similar issues as ferral cats do. As a rule, never hold eye contact for prolonged period of time or invade your problem dog’s space. Direct eye contact can be misunderstood as a threat…as opposed to just wanting to give your doggie a kiss :( Both problem cats and problem dogs need their own territory and a quiet place to “escape” to. Hence using the crate as described above. Again, good luck!!!

  6. julia's authentic pelts says:

    Omg cat ladies stay safe. I am fucking terrified of this storm! No doubt donks will tweet that the east coast is totes over- reacting , as she did when there was an earthquake in jersey a couple of years ago.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      [img]http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z200/venuscloacina/th_DONKEYON.jpg[/img]

      No, on a serious note though, it scares me for everyone in its path & I’ll be sending good vibes to you all. Hopefully catladies will maybe take a moment to check in here, before & after, let us know when all is well again for each of ya?

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        While they still have a connection, the live ustream of the two storm chasers is getting … dicey. http://www.ustream.tv/new

        They just mentioned a bridge washed out w/ un-rescued people on the wrong end, but I couldn’t catch the name. Geez …

      • Bouncing Little Burro says:

        Good wishes to all the catladies/men on the East Coast. I’m in the D.C. area and apparently it’s about to get hit any minute now. Jacy, how are you holding up?

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      I have been thinking that all day. You know she would. If she’s not present for a major event, then that event earns mockery or total silence.

      • Tonyamichaela says:

        Julia is so spiritual now, and subways and electricity are so material. Get thee to an ashram, Sandy victims! Or pay $$$ for a grifter trip to figure out why an unprecedented tragedy is preventing you from releasing your inner self!

        Of course, if Julia had been in NYC, she would be all “I was inside.”

    • Stinky Velour Couture says:

      Yes,!! exactly! ” NO BIG DEAL.” to Julie, “expert” “founder” “100+”

      I really don’t like the way her life is going. It’s certaily far less entertaining because it’s soooo pathetic. New Agey nonsense is such a cliche & grift.

    • Stinky Velour Couture says:

      PS– that earthquake was up-and-down the east coast. BIG-ish.

  7. idiotbox says:

    Hope all of you are surviving the storm without any major problems!
    [img]http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/377482_10151463861839989_189399801_n.jpg[/img]

    • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

      This masterpiece doubles as an expression of Donkey’s view of RBD: a looming, imminent, inexorable threat to Liberty.

  8. CDB says:

    OT still no power here in CT. I went to the library and rented The Day After Tomorrow, Remember that movie about global warming and the new Ice Age. It was really creepy to watch after Sandy and the snow storms in west virginia. good one to rent after a storm. My Dog did not bite me.

  9. Sake Bombardier says:

    I’ve been suppressing the urge to pat myself on the back but since I can’t afford to keep dropping my phone and this post is still on top in my reader…. OMG RBNS used my fauxtoshoppe! *swoon* I can die a happy hater.

  10. Donkey later says:

    Donkey is just too boring these days, perhaps time to put her to rest as Weebl & Bob did: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvUqe2n8L3E.

    What say you catladies?

    • bitchface says:

      Agreed, put a fork in it. Even if she comes back to the teevee and gets married in a tacky pink wedding, she’s fallen to below pathetic and boring. Julia Allison Baugher has officially jumped her own shark now.

  11. Grifty Shades of Bray says:

    Eh, she’ll be back from Peru soon and the cray will restart.

    Happy Halloween!

    http://www.amazon.com/Little-Man-The-Boat-Costume/dp/B005D9LZXE/ref=pd_sxp_f_pt

    • juliapublicist says:

      But do we care? Really?

      • du/coveted vag space says:

        no. we don’t. let’s agree to moveon.org.

      • LickedRandisCake says:

        Have we ever? I mean, has anyone ever really cared? I always thought she was more a catalyst to shoot the shit and commune. Though, admittedly, the catalyst could be more or less interesting depending on her antics.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        I will care if she comes back and is the same crazy-ass cunt she’s always been, because that always happens after her “spiritual retreats,” and it’s always hilarious.

        If she just dramatically reduces her online bullshittery, makes her FB account private and lives a relatively normal and discreet life, at last, then I won’t care. Love and light, Donkey!

        • Mazen Carleton says:

          Julia’s become so sad. This place is a community but there’s always been an undercurrent of possibility that Julia would get one more break. I can’t figure out what the break would be this time; there is no way MissAdvised is coming back, she’s dating an abject failure, and her only real acquaintances are grifters and charlatans. We may have to adopt a new scorn object to keep this place together.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            I know she never reads here so I hope she’s reading this. When she goes off the grid, we get quickly bored and openly ponder shutting up shop. If the fucking idiot just stopped making such an online ass of herself, her “haters” would disperse. But she cannot do it. There will be more insanity, my children. Cuckoolady will soon fly her crazy-cunt flag once more.

          • Mazen Carleton says:

            Is it enough for her to go on being an idiotic asshole? I think at least some of the currency of this place derives from the chance, however minute, that she gets decent opportunities despite being a vapid, obtuse, lazy, talentless hack.

          • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

            your mention of new scorn objects sent me over to gala darling’s site, which promptly crashed my browser. damn you gala! *fist shakes*

          • Mazen Haverford says:

            Taza Davis (Rockstar Diaries) is apparently friends with Gala Darling now. These people are all so weird.

          • Princess WideStance says:

            Jacy, I agree. And actually, I’ve been having a great time following her down this weird grifter rabbit hole. It’s a whole new cast of characters and promises to get even more lulzy as she drinks more kool-aid.

            To me it’s just as entertaining as Miss Advised. All these insane people and their snake oil, and there’s the donkey just lapping it up with zero awareness. Julia’s quality of life or level of loserdom has never mattered to me. All I want is the entertainment and funny comments from you smart haterz.

        • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

          I know a lot of you have been here a long time but I, as one of the people lured here by Miss Assvised, have only recently started reveling in the Donkey snark. I’m still engaged and think I could easily be as long as she keeps humiliating herself.

    • darling dearest says:

      thats a terrible costume.

  12. Tingolayo says:

    Yesterday after work, I went shoe shopping. (My god, there are a lot of clompers/elevator shoes out there. I thought that trend was dying.) Then, last night, I dreamed that I was trying on shoes (make sense so far), and in the dream I was trying on big donkey clompers for a joke and…. Greg strike me dead if I’m lying…. I was posing wide-stance style and braying. But I couldn’t get the mouth right. Even in the dream I was thinking “Lord I’m pathetic,” but I was trying to get a Donkey shot to post on RBD.

    I am genuinely disturbed that I had a dream about her. I’ve never had a dream about Teresa Giudice or Danielle Staub or some nutjob from Survivor, and I’ve been mocking some of those people for years.

  13. Don Quixote says:

    Totes OT, and totally another girl (literally) I absolutely cannot stand. But doesn’t this seem like a costume that Donks would totally go gaga over? Oh wait, this is exactly how she sees herself.

  14. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    GAG GIFTS FROM WAL-MART’S BARGAIN BIN:

    [img]http://i46.tinypic.com/dmcs2e.png[/img]

    • Andy Whorehol says:

      You’re just jealous. How many Wal Mart bargain bins have YOU made it into?!

    • Ridonkulous says:

      This seems like the right place for that old punchline, “Oh, we’ve already settled that question. Now we’re just haggling over the price.”

  15. Albie Quirky says:

    “Gag” is the word.

    “I’ve been marked down!”

Comments are closed.