Freak

Check out this weird, random, non-sequitur-y Wall Street Journal video. Was someone asking: “Hey fatty, what the hell are you doing at Fashion Week?” Is she famous for having a body-image meltdown at Fashion Week? What is the news peg? Why is she making like her own lifelong, fucked-up body issues are a news story, and she’s doing yoga for ALL THE GIRLS, and why did the Wall Street Journal fall for it?

Also — holy shit, is that Debby doing yoga next to her? Wow. He’s a real tinkerbelle, huh?

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297 Responses to Freak

  1. Leased D-Class TaskRabbit "boyfriend" (Formerly Floppy) says:

    [img]http://i.imgur.com/THVAj.gif[/img]

  2. A colossus of scheme juices and failure says:

    Understatement of the century:
    “I don’t have thin tiny legs” -Julia Allison

    I know there are 80+ years left to the end of the century but, after seeing the size of those cankles, I don’t think a bigger understatement will be uttered by anybody anywhere.

    PS: Hey, Debbie. You look cute. Wanna hang out? “Splash” has musical Mondays tonight. I *know* that will be right up your alley!

    • Tingolayo says:

      up his alley

    • mule on rouge says:

      “Thin tiny legs” don’t sound desirable in the least; they would be either comical (little child’s legs on an NFL linebacker) or tragic (starving children awaiting your sponsorship of just pennies a day — go ahead, make the call, seriously). I think “shapely legs” would be a better fantasy for Donks.

  3. Albie Quirky says:

    Julie’s yoga form is horrible.

  4. KS says:

    lol downward-facing donkey.
    [img]http://i.imgur.com/69pi4.jpg[/img]

    • secret fail says:

      Her knee is so far over her toes! Take a step out, Donkey. Sheesh.

      • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

        Right? And look at her other backleg. Yeesh.

        Do I understand right, that the author of the article also did the yoga w/ them, so that’s probably her in the striped pants & green shirt? With her eyes closed? So she really didn’t see D0nkey’s botched yoga & just spun BS about how “graceful” she is.

        • Tonyamichaela says:

          I’m still a beginner at yoga, but all of the poses they did (except for dancer) seem pretty easy to me. I guess the instructor was trying to instill self-esteem. When I do yoga, I always feel: wow my body is amazing, and then, ahhh my body is so feeble.

    • Tingolayo says:

      She uses yoga in the same misguided way that some people use feng shui– completely mangling its original philosophy.

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      That first frame should read “Reporter” Katie Rosman. Actual journalists do some sort of background check on their subject.

    • lizzieborden says:

      Now where have I seen that yoga outfit before????

  5. Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

    Here’s the piece accompanying the video. What a poorly written piece of shit.

    http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2012/10/01/julia-allison-of-miss-advised-does-yoga-to-stay-in-reality/

    • Psychotic Today says:

      She does not have an elle column. The HAD an elle column.

    • Blinking.S.O.S.at.the.Camera says:

      ” In 2009, Allison spent nearly a month at an ashram in upstate New York … ”

      Oh how interesting! Thanks for that factoid WSJ journalist!
      Except it was two weeks and it was in May 2010.

      • Queen Neferteeri says:

        Didn’t she go to the ass-ram for a few days around Thanksgiving?

        • Blinking.S.O.S.at.the.Camera says:

          Yes supposedly, but it could’ve been a cover-up for a trip to Pensacola to ensnare Pancakes.

          • Queen Neferteeri says:

            Didn’t she post some geotagged photo from a kiddie playground or schoolyard while at the ass-ram?

          • KS says:

            @Queen

            Yes, but it was near the ashram. I was the one who found the EXIF data but I now believe the fact it showed her in a parking lot or playground was due to the iPhone not correctly reporting her location. So I think she was probably there. For a little bit at least.

          • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

            I remember that. (Found out EXIF is pretty cool.) Seems like it was a high school pkg lot & we’d surmised that D0nkey was meeting her henchman Lasagna for the payoff of doing some dastardly deed while D0nkey had an alibi. Or maybe that was just me … probably.

          • Queen Neferteeri says:

            Thank you, KS. I didn’t think that ass-ram visit was a cover for stalking Pancakes, and you confirmed it.

          • Blinking.S.O.S.at.the.Camera says:

            She posted that swing picture during her first visit in May.

  6. BeepBeepBoopBeepBeep. I Am A Robot. says:

    Can the whole yoga-thing be over already! And those shorts ARE short…great gobs of dick would be flopping out if it were any other guy. Am I right?

    • Wow says:

      No straight man wears shorts that short.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      He has no dick and no balls. I showed his short-short photos to my man. He’s not exactly a porn star, but he’s got something in his pants, and he says there’s no way his scrotum and part of his dong would not have been hanging out while wearing those shorts, if he could have even squeezed into them. He agrees that PencilDonk has been cursed with absolutely no package to speak of.

      • Jack the Bulldog says:

        Nor am I John Holmes but my package can def be seen when wearing running shorts not all that short. Debby reminds me of Michael Jackson in his “Black & White” video, grabbing his crotch when there appears to be no there there.

    • Jelly Roll says:

      My first thought (even before the general “you’ve got to be KIDDING me/Canklehausen) was “so he really doesn’t have a penis”. I would be horrified to see the huscat wearing those shorts, it would be so obscene. But on GoatSoap ? Not a testicle in sight/cite/site.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Maybe he tucks.

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      So all those burning man costumes were not costumes at all…just his work out clothes?

  7. Tonyamichaela says:

    If her parents ever read this article, their reactions would be hilarious.
    Julia: I’m in the Wall Street Journal!
    Dadsers: Why?
    Julia: I do yoga in the middle of the day because I’m unemployed.
    Dadsers: *drops phone, cancels subscription*

  8. Peltergeist says:

    What is this?! Seriously, what IS this?? How is she still making her failed, one-season, D-list reality show happen? What happened to the notion that at a specific point after the fact, news is no longer considered to be news? Why is this reporter with that awful accent and flat voice even doing this package? Why is Julsie doing her introspective, 3am earnest sadface on-camera yet boisterously punching and grabbing her fellow classmates? SO MANY QUESTIONS, NO ANSWERS.

    • donniedriveby says:

      What hand delivered and horrifically failed opportunity has she ever STOPPED going on and on about?

  9. Peltergeist says:

    This is truly shocking to me because the writers/editors I deal with at a lot of the publications Julia Allison has been “featured” in or “quoted” in are all hard-nosed professionals who truly won’t let one thing slide by them. Then I see their colleagues are not only doing fluff (and doing fluff wrong!), but reporting statements that could so easily be proven false and essentially acting like a Julia Allison PR machine for absolutely no reason. Gross.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      The WSJ blogs get very little attention from editorial, much to the rage of the people on the print side who sometimes get micromanaged by editorial. On the upside, the blogs pay crap.

    • Barking Mad, Intel Advisor says:

      Yes, the lack of due diligence seems to be everywhere these days. It’s disheartening.

  10. donkolnikov says:

    OT:

    Catladies Mr. Meowmix and I are leaving Boston to celebrate our anniversary in NYC (seeing Louis CK!) and I’m in charge of finding a hotel. Do you have any hotel recommendations? Preferably places Donk hasn’t stayed at or shilled for? I work at a nonprofit and am a student so am looking to spend less than $350 – it will be a Saturday night that we are going. I am one of the poors and don’t know much about this stuff.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Where is the show? Where are other things you might like to do? That will help narrow recommendations.

    • GreenBrayRoad says:

      If you don’t mind crossing over the bridge, the Nu Hotel in Brooklyn is in a great location for restaurants, shops, bars and transport and rooms are under $300.

      • Wonkeye says:

        Nu hotel is really cute and the management is nice. Look on Quikbook for deals for everything else.

    • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

      I have quite a few friends who absolutely love staying at The Pod & so my relatives who are there now are giving it a try & have said it’s great for the $$.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      I am a cheap, so I tend to stay at the Gershwin or at one of the Apple Core hotels. The Gem SoHo isn’t bad.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      There is a great Hampton Inn in lower Manhattan, right next to the Brooklyn Bridge, with big rooms and some of them actually have big decks overlooking the East River. I love lower Manhattan — not everyone does — so I always stay there and sit out on the deck and take in the sights and that lovely bridge, which is lit up at night. It’s a good deal and there are lots of great little restaurants around that area. You can avoid the tourist crush a few blocks away at the 9-11 Memorial easily enough — there is lots to see in lower Manhattan.

    • donkolnikov says:

      It is in the New York City Center, on West 55th Street. I like eating (in and out of the basement) and history/museums – Catman is a tech guy. Haven’t been to New York in over a year, and haven’t stayed overnight since I was a kid (from CT so mostly went on school field trips there) and am really excited to go. We haven’t thought of many other plans yet but will probably be meeting up with some friends who live in the city, and wanted to get anniversary dinner somewhere.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        Ah! Well, the New Yorker and the Yotel seem to have some bargains, as does the Newton (which I love) even though it’s a bit uptown.

    • Greg says:

      The show is at New York City Center, West 55th Street, between 6th and 7th Avenues (I know because I’m going on Friday), so pretty central. Have you looked at the Fitzpatrick or the Benjamin? I’ve seen them sometimes for ~$250 – across town but still in the 50s and an easy walk.

    • braycation, all i ever wanted says:

      tablethotels and jetsetter often have deals, esp. for one night, and tablet collects the more reasonable boutique-y, design-y hotels in one place. I’ve gotten great deals through both but it’s kind of random timing-wise, so it’s worth looking there before you’d book through some other source.

    • braycation, all i ever wanted says:

      also, if you want an invite to the private sales on tablet, i am happy to send one if you have a donk-safe email. . .

    • New Year New You says:

      If you don’t mind shared bathrooms The Larchmont is super cheap; great location at 5th Ave and the west village, and super dooper clean, even the shared bathrooms.

      Or try East Village Bed and Coffee.

      Giving you cheaper options because regular Manhattan hotels are stoopid prices for weekend nights, and also midtown is hell.

    • Fake Kidney Infucktion says:

      Have you tried airbnb!?

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Anything downtown/financial district/Seaport. Jacy is talking about the Seaport, I believe. I had friends who stayed in a boutique hotel over the summer in FiDi and said it was the biggest room they ever had in nyc. It’s called Gild Hall. Although there’s not great stuff to do around there, it is walking distance to Tribeca. Also, all subways go to FiDi.

      • Jelly Roll says:

        I once needed a night away – on the cheap, so I flew to NYC, and stayed at the Pickwick Arms. It was kind of great of the time (I was 19 and all kinds of impressed with my “on my own” self). It’s been almost a decade, but it would be worth looking into. (I think I paid about $125 at the time).

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        Yes, that’s right — Seaport. I love that area!

      • (yes, she was one) says:

        Gildhall has the most comfortable beds EVER. Custom made.

      • Queen Neferteeri says:

        Also, all subways go to FiDi.

        Except for the local lines, the Broadway line, the 6th Ave line. Also, lots of MTA construction work there on the weekends, which knocks out subway service from Friday night until Monday morning.

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        Queen N–true that subway service can be knocked out on certain lines on weekends, but there’s no other area that has as many choices of lines than Fidi. Unless you combine East, Middle and West Midtown. Not very walkable.

        Not sure what you mean about the local lines–I take the 1 and the N/R from Rector all the time. And the 6 local is at City Hall. You got me on the F.

        • Queen Neferteeri says:

          That’s on the western edge of the FiDi, while the Seaport is by the East River. Not a quick walk to/from Rector. And if someone is staying in the Battery Park area, then all the other lines are a bit of a hike.

          Also, no B,D,M. The J doesn’t run on weekends.

          I used to live there, but fled screaming into the night after the influx of Donkey-like types.

          • ShesJustStupid says:

            Definitely not great transportation from Seaport, but from the Wall Street area, it’s better than most neighborhoods. I agree about living there. I hated it (on Wall Street). I moved to Battery Park City a few years ago, which, while remote, is on the water and doesn’t have a bunch of frat boys and whiny girls with little dogs.

          • Queen Neferteeri says:

            Agree on all counts! When I moved, I never looked at BPC because it just seems too remote for my needs. The R is often re-routed from Canal St. right into Brooklyn on weekends, and the 1 is often out of service then, too.

            But I love the Esplanade, right outside the WFC.

    • oldballz says:

      I just stayed at the Andaz on Wall Street while my apartment was being painted. Paid less than $200 per night and the room was very big by NY standards. Free wine in the evenings in the lobby, too.

      • Skirt Pull says:

        That is a beautiful, amazing hotel. Best hotel I’ve ever stayed in. They upgraded me to a bigger room after hearing about my crazy flights that day. Watched TV while soaking in the world’s most amazing tub and had the best night’s sleep of my life.

        • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

          They went the extra mile to offset having your day effed over by travel hassles? Now THAT is some good customer service …

    • Sake Bombardier says:

      Ramada Inn, Journal Square, Jersey City. Cheap, clean, 20 mins from Herald Square.

  11. Lady Donk Donk says:

    How could the Wall Street journal puts its name on this?

    • Dr. Fraud, MD says:

      Well, remember that the same people now own WSJ who feature Bill O’Reilly on their Faux News network so…you know…

    • Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

      Katie Rosman is a friend of a friend, and I’ve met her a handful of times. She strikes me as a tremendous famewhore who’s only gotten as far as she has at the WSJ because she works insanely hard on puff pieces (although I’ll admit she does work hard) and promotes herself to the point of delirium. She probably idolizes JA in a strange sense.

      I suspect she has an editor who thinks she’ll make the WSJ more relatable to yoga moms.

    • afghani says:

      3 words:

      Owned. by. NewsCorp.

  12. How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

    Okay, this is weird. I queued up The Mindy Project & as it’s loading, natch a commercial comes on. So, in this montage of people, one chick looks like Emily Morse’s friend (Ruby?) & another chick looks like Amy Laurent. Or so I think.

    HERE’S THE LINK: http://www.hulu.com/watch/ad/147902

    Does anyone else see the resemblances? Surely it’s not them, is it?

  13. Who do you think you are? says:

    This is a pointless and stupid piece but I’m chiming in because I want to say two nice things:
    -The photo accompanying the article actually makes her look fashionable. I don’t know what that dress is all about, it’s maybe too short in the front, it’s not now nor was it 90 degrees during fashion week, and I know I would look terrible on me, but I think she looks good.
    -She comes across as a lot calmer in the video than she normally does. With the exception of stupid nodding when the yoga teacher says this is probably the first time today you’ve probably been still, she seems less interested in making Intellectual Donkey faces and gestures and instead seems like a real person.
    -A lack of makeup and sausage curls does wonders for her looks.

    • Who do you think you are? says:

      Three nice things! Math is hard!

    • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

      I agree that her face looked better w/ less make-up & more natural color & the less seen of the pelts the better, forever & always.

    • JFA says:

      She’s wearing a lot of makeup there. AND false eyelashes. JEsus christ burn those things.

      And her newer horsier horseteeth are awful. I just can’t.

      Her boyfriend continues to be homosexual. I have about 4 pairs of those AA shorts. My excuse is I’m female.

      • Jack the Bulldog says:

        The pornstar eyelashes are the most noticeable moment in the vid. That Juliar Allison, always striving for authenticity!

      • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Mercedes C Class) says:

        “Her boyfriend continues to be homosexual.”

        DEAD

    • moonshinedonkey says:

      I agree – she seems like a normal human in this video. And I understood most of what she said, which is huge improvement over every single interview before this where I was left wondering, “What the fuck was she trying to say this whole time? Is she speaking English?”

      Congratulations, MawMouth. That’s my first compliment of the year for you.

      • A-Game Content says:

        See, I don’t have a single nice thing to say about this video. Who the eff does she think she’s kidding, spouting this bull crap? Who, aside from us basement-dwellers, even cares to watch it? I have no time for A Donkey spouting off self-love platitudes and pretending it’s an accomplishment. In fact, this has reignited my malign for A Donkey. Guess what Donkey, *many* girls go through periods of insecurity and self-doubt. Part of what makes you a WOMAN is learning to get past those feelings by looking outside yourself and asking what you can do to improve the world around you. Your fauxga persona is just as inauthentic, self-absorbed and soiled (typo and it stays) as your wannabe woman-in-tech persona. Oh and i know i know, bodysnarking sucks but guess what, your inner fat girl shows because instead of just confidently doing your poses in whatever clothes help you move, you just can’t help drawing attention to the things you’re obsessed with- that is, your thighs.

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          I agree.

          a. She can’t believe that SHE should be made to feel bad at Fashion Week! Julia Allison, of all people! She is so hot!!! So if SHE is made to feel bad at Fashion Week, this is a huge problem that must be stamped out!

          b. She also thinks she’s special because she feels bad at Fashion Week, like no one else has ever felt that way.

          c. She thinks it’s noteworthy, newsworthy even, that she is such a unique snowflake that she has been able to shake off these bad feelings via yoga.

          • Tingolayo says:

            Here’s a thought: don’t go to Fashion Week. Don’t read fashion magazines. Don’t worry about who’s fat or thin or young or old or tiny or cute or what they did in high school.

          • Delurked says:

            agreed. if you feel like you don’t belong at fashion week then you probably don’t. and i’m saying that as someone who used to LOVE it, but the last few years found myself caring less and less, and feeling less and less like it was a place that i enjoyed myself, so now i don’t attend anything unless i have to/really want to. she only goes because she still sees it like it’s the cool kids table in the cafeteria. get. over. it.

  14. bitchface says:

    that is the dumbest, most goddamned pointless video I have seen of anyone EVER. I want that 1 min 46 seconds back of my life.

    what is the point?
    what is her point of existince?
    why is Devin so freaking skinny?

    sigh

    • bitchface says:

      HOW IS THIS WRITER WRITING FOR THE WSJ (even in their stupid blogs)???

      “She traveled for 14 months and realized that she longed to live in a community that didn’t value thinness and career success above inner-beauty. She moved to Los Angeles.”

      Is that an attempt at irony? Somehow, I don’t think so!

      • Nickelodeon Chic says:

        See above comments – I posted them at the top because I’m dumb.

        The author’s colleagues have been tweeting at her all “LULZ that line was so funny girl.”

      • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Mercedes C Class) says:

        Also, she did not travel for 14 months, she couch surfed between NYC, SF and LA which she still does to this day. THAT IS NOT TRAVELING. FACT CHECK – TRY IT.

  15. This one is a no-boner says:

    This reporter is just the worst. The accent! She needs to stick to writing failed nobody puff pieces in her native Illinois/Wisconsin (can’t tell which). Her pitch to WSJ: Shicahhhhgooww Gerrl in New York!!!

  16. Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

    A MAJOR TRANSFORMATION HAS HAPPENED, PEOPLE.

    Julia Allison:

    lived in a tacky pink apartment in a major American city –> lives in a tacky pink apartment in a major American city

    had a small white dog –> has a small white dog (FREE LILLY!)

    had long sausage curled reddish-brown hair –> has long sausage curled reddish-brown hair

    was profiled in puff pieces with no fact checking –> is profiled in puff pieces with no fact checking

    had no job –> has no job

    fameballed in inappropriate outfits –> fameballs in inappropriate outfits

    well, actually, the only discernible change is

    had no boyfriend –> has gay boyfriend

    also, she is (still) fat now!

    • A colossus of scheme juices and failure says:

      Used to do yoga fauxtoshoots with boyfriend –> Does yoga fauxtoshoots with boyfriend.

      It’s a new me! ME! ME! MEEEEEEE!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! MEEE!!! NEW!!!

      Suck it, haters!!! HAHAHAHA!!!

    • Ex Spurt says:

      Absolutely, Prof (love your work, btw). In the quest to find and embrace her authentic self she has discovered she is actually a big, fucking fake so she is now, authentically , a big fucking fake. Such progress.

      I’ve had a little transformation: Suffered from Cankleshausen -> Symptom free for about a year now.

      Also, want to comment on Pencildonk. I find him rather fascinating, in a eunuch kind of way. So wonderfully symbolic of all her previous attempted emasculations. Be careful what you wish for… Anyway, could we have anticipated such an apt sidekick for this grotesque, sad and fat (and skinny), comedy? And, omigod, what must Dad$ers be thinking.

      • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

        Notable that she has not once mentioned meeting his family.

        • Ex Spurt says:

          I get the impression they may be a little (very) different to John and Cindy McCain. As different as Pancakes McCain and PencilDonk Stetler. Poor, old, has-to-be-mortified Dad$ers.

  17. meanguy says:

    So apparently it is possible to watch footage of yoga pants intercut with fashion week without requiring a personal inseam adjustment.

    I miss the badonkadonk-era Donk.

  18. KS says:

    katierosman katierosman ‏@katierosman

    Do you love/love to hate reality TV people? Read my piece on doing #yoga with @juliaallison. There is a video too! http://on.wsj.com/QEQf6A

    Jesus. You call that tidbit a piece? You should be ashamed of yourself. Go back to your high school newspaper. I could barely maintain interest long enough to grab a couple screenshots.

  19. How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

    I’ll just leave this d0nkey pile right here.

    Never mind that 31-year-old Devin Stetler’s old & revised LinkedIn’s only show him to have had one engineering gig, & that was three years ago …
    [img]http://i46.tinypic.com/2usic1f.png[/img]
    (I think D0nkey transformed someone into a lying bag of shit)

    • Jelly Roll says:

      Oh perhaps he’s lying about his age?

    • JFA says:

      That pic. Is so bad. I feel sorry for him, he’s almost too much of a tool to make fun of honestly.

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      He prides himself on never missing a deadline? Debby sure didn’t learn that amazing strategy from his beard.

    • Edward R. Burro says:

      “Curious by nature and adventurous by habit, he integrates his discoveries of the world and people into his trade to build solutions character and substance.”

      Wtf? That is some word salad right there.

    • SirClompsAlot says:

      This looks like a cheesy fake wallet photo. Julia’s dating a bona fide wallet photo model. I guess that’s as close as she could get to dating a wallet.

    • Software Monkey says:

      A “software developer”? Where’s his github account? I’d like to see some of his groundbreaking “discoveries of the world” in source code format.

      • Grammarian says:

        github heh heh heh

      • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

        NEVER. READS. HERE.

        [img]http://i46.tinypic.com/2mmda3t.png[/img]

      • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

        NEVER. READS. HERE.

        [img]http://i46.tinypic.com/2mmda3t.png[/img]

        • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

          Sorry for double-post — I swear I’m not doing it intentionally!

          • Queen Neferteeri says:

            If you were a technical strategist with 15 years old engineering experience, that would not have happened!

          • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

            I was being adventurous!

          • EyeRoller says:

            Brayella–Thank you for integrating discoveries of idiotic people into your trade to build stories with hilarious characters and substance. Oh, and never missing a deadline!

          • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

            @Eyeroller:

            Brayella works hard at under-employed & she prides herself on 20 years three years of strategic integration of evidential D0nkey-related asshattery — & she never colors outside the lines.

        • EyeRoller says:

          Yes Brayella, but unlike Debby’s job description, yours actually makes sense.

        • Mini Driver says:

          Ugh, it freaks me out when they do that! It’s like a character on “L.A. Complex” is reacting to our heckling or something. Leave the fourth wall where it is!

  20. SilverBulletViBRAYtor says:

    AGAIN with calling it “Lulu Lemon!” She is truly a Great Head of Stone.

  21. idiotbox says:

    PLEASE someone who isn’t at work create “the goal was never to be famous” link-show in response to this “It has long been Allison’s intention to get famous, as she herself would tell you, or at least to get a reality show.”

    She is a moron.

    • idiotbox says:

      Just a taste
      “But … my true goal was never fame:
      http://juliaallison.com/julia-allison-talks-to-prweek-about-the-trickybusiness-of-being-a-web-celebrity-in-the-age-of-personality-journalismprweek-your-wired-magazine-cover-generated-a-lot-of-controversy-what-are-your-though/

      “In a recent interview, when I asked Julia what prompted her to become an Internet Celeb, she quickly denied that such an unlikely path was her goal. ”
      http://www.zmogo.com/internet-famous-the-julia-allison-story/

      “Actually, the true goal was never “fame” at all. ”
      http://gawker.com/5026738/

      • Oversized Veneers says:

        Damn the gawker link sent me into a rabbit hole. Some of the comments have me dying!!

        From the 2008 article about her Wired cover:

        “Internet Famous indeed. Outside the little bubble of this online world she’s just another piece of ass.”

        “You guys are so mean, but it’s just because you want her and you can’t have her.”

        “I was under the impression that anyone could have her, but that is only because I read ValleyWag.”

        “In the NYC area, not only can you have a Julia Allison, you can have her friends right after. She’s just distancing herself from the scads of competition in NY by heading west. The Valley isn’t as well stocked, (read not as much competition) as the East Coast.
        We’re tired of her, you can keep her and pals.”

        “It says she’s “Internet famous” which, as we all know isn’t actually famous at all. Plus the headline notes that you can reach this level of cyber-trailer-trash fame “even if you’re nobody”.

        “Yes, a short, bow-legged fame whore is *exactly* what we’re missing”

        And this was in 2008! So 4 years later….same old shit. Nothing has changed.

      • Tingolayo says:

        LOL– comparing herself to Nora Ephron! I have a side stitch from laughing. And the part where she wonders why dating columnists are considered a joke, whereas sports columnists aren’t. If she would read anything besides Cosmopolitan, she’d see that there are plenty of sex, dating, and relationship columnists who are well-trained, well-educated, and well-respected. She’s just not one of them.

        She’s written pages and pages (screens and screens) over the years wherein she argues that she is a real writer with a real job. And yet, as Gawker asks, does anyone remember anything that she’s actually written? She spends more time arguing that she’s a writer, than she does actually writing. THAT is why she isn’t taken seriously.

  22. du/coveted vag space says:

    i am an old and don’t know how to cut and paste photos. but here’s a direct pick up of what she says about the article on fb. (health scare earlier this week, people…)

    Julia Allison
    Katie Rosman wrote a lovely blog/video in the WSJ today which mentioned what I really care about now (authenticity, not taking myself too seriously, being okay with my body, not being afraid of mistakes) and my really wonderful new boyfriend Devin … and you know what I focused on? The three things I didn’t like: 1) the fact that the reporter described my life objective as “becoming famous.” If that’s my real objective – which I don’t believe it is – not only is that a stupid objective, but I’ve failed pretty miserably. 2) The negative comments which can be summed up as “Julia sucks at life.” and 3) The fact that the photo makes me look A) bitchy and B) pregnant.

    I know, I know, just look for the negative. You’ll always find it. As Julia Price sings, “What you get is only what you look for … ”

    What I had hoped people would take from the piece is that you can leave Manhattan and a stressful, crazy, status-and-recognition obsessed life, and
    be happier and healthier, that you can change your perspective and your goals completely thanks to yoga and a lot of (pretty scary) experiences like, for example, doing a reality show. That – in fact – doing a reality show could actually lead you to realize that the REALLY good stuff is pretty normal. Waking up to a boyfriend who loves you, cooking dinners at home, walking your dog, stretching, sleeping.

    I had a health scare earlier this week, and just having a body that WORKS is a gift … so that is what (after my initial reaction) I will choose to focus on, and not the rest.

    http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2012/10/01/julia-allison-of-miss-advised-does-yoga-to-stay-in-reality/

    • idiotbox says:

      Wasn’t it Lily the one who had a health scare?

      • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

        *ahem*

        Earlier this week, as in yesterday? & resolved today?
        Words, D0nkey … the way you use ‘em are not fine.

        Scott Spiro ‏@ScottSpiro
        @juliaallison Jane saw you yesterday morning as she drove to work- are you ok? (had us worried)

        25 Sep Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison
        @ScottSpiro – yes, thank you. I thought something happened to Lilly and couldn’t breathe. Lilly (and me) are fine.
        2:04 PM – 25 Sep 12

      • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

        dont’ take it so seriously, feel free to relax — yoga helps with that! — and i can’t believe you remember that, that was LAST WEEK! in sum, calm down kevin idiotbox! love and light!

      • Factory Seconds says:

        THAT WAS DAYS AGO.

    • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

      “katie rosman wrote a lovely…video.” this donkey KANT write.

    • Donkton Blabby says:

      What the fuck does ““What you get is only what you look for … ” mean?

      Ugh, words — Toilet Julia does not know how to use themz.

    • JFA says:

      ENOUGH with the “I left NYC and I’m SO HAPPY” bullshit. I don’t know about LA or care about LA really, but imma guess LA is pretty face paced as well.

      Just because you failed at life in NYC doesn’t mean you accomplished something. Fuck off.

      • Donkton Blabby says:

        I too recently moved from NYC to LA. It’s just as hectic, superficial, looks-obsessed, etc, if not more-so. It’s not like she moved to Durango, Colorado or Sedona or something. Donkey is basically giving herself a gold medal for switching from drinking Coke to Pepsi.

        Also, Donkey appropriating yoga as “HER THING OMG ME ME ME” is giving me the stabbies, as someone who has diligently studied the practice for years and done various teacher trainings (I know I sound like an asshole, but still). Wearing a LuLu Lemon outfit and eating vegan treats after a private rooftop yoga class does not a yogi make. And yet, she fancies herself the next Ram Dass but with a face full of plastics, a pink bike and a Pencil Donk. God I wish she’d shut up forever.

        • JFA says:

          Seriously. I’m sure LA is SO NOT “status and recognition obsessed.” LOL for miles. And once again, making it seem like it was a big lifestyle choice to move there. You moved there because you were unemployed, Dadsers canceled the NYC rent, you needed out of the downtown Chicago condo, and you had to participate in an insipid, never to be seen again reality show that was promptly forgotten.

          Take comfort in the fact that a) she will be over yoga in 5 minutes and onto the next fad from 1995 that she doesn’t understand and b) she is doing it wrong anyway.

          Crunchy granola girl just doin’ yoga, wearing eye pelts. NAMASTE.

          • JFA says:

            Drivin’ a c-class mercedes because she is SO NOT STATUS OBSESSED. Fucker. She is the quintessence of status obsessed.

          • Donkton Blabby says:

            All of the THISes for the Mercedes comment, JFA. It’s too bad she can’t make money being a hypocrite, because she’d be Fuck You money rich with her skills.

        • pearipathetic donkey says:

          Especially since she moved to LA to pursue a career in entertainment.

      • Delurked says:

        THANK YOU. those kinds of people drive me BONKERS and she is one of the worst.

    • JFA says:

      Notice how “working” is not part of her important things in life list.

      Would that we all could live a life of yoga, having a gay boyfriend, eating, and sleeping.

      Also why is she even “focused” on her own piece anyway? GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR OWN FAT ASS. Crikey.

    • Tingolayo says:

      She is just so so self-absorbed and self-righteous. “My life has been so hard because I am so critical of myself, and such a perfectionist, but now, at age 31, I’ve had a life-changing epiphany that I can’t describe or even articulate, except to say that I am a better person than any of you could even hope to be.”

      The things that we have all been experiencing since, like, childhood– highs and lows, struggles, disappointments, heartbreaks, life changes, job changes, etc– and that have made us stronger, more grateful, more self-reliant, more humble, whatever…. she acts like they ONLY happen to her, and that she is some brave, strong warrior for triumphing over them. (“OMG, cars are expensive! OMG, having loved ones is important! OMG, I’m not going to worry about my body anymore!” are epiphanies for her at age 31???!!!)

      What a brave little soldier she was, to survive the urban jungle of Manhattan’s penthouse soirees, free trips from millionaire friends, costume parties, and a grueling 5-hour-a-week job. What a defiant move, to retire in peace to the quiet of Los Angeles, free of cameras and grifters and status cars and tv studios and all the other things that threatened to corrupt our down-to-earth midwestern girl. “I’ve transformed myself– now give me a gold medal!”

      Just live your frickin’ life like the rest of us do, without expecting a pat on the head. Get a job, work hard, do something that fulfills you and that you can be proud of. Support yourself, take care of yourself. Give something back to your loved ones and to the world.

      Such a child.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        Self-righteous, melodramatic, image-obsessed — hers and everyone else’s — White Girl problem lunatic. Go find a real problem, asshole.

      • JFA says:

        Her life has been hard mostly because she had no boyfriend. Now she has one, so her life is fulfilled. Until she gets bored with him, or he flees. Lather rinse repeat.

        So brave, this one.

      • Helena (Vitruvian Donkey) says:

        Dokula’s insistence that she is a super self-critical perfectionitht never fails to crack me up. If you’re such a perfectionist, why don’t you wash your pelts or ugly shoes?

    • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

      and 3) The fact that the photo makes me look A) bitchy and B) pregnant.

      NEVER. READS. HERE.
      Except when she does. (If you look at the previous post, the word pregnant appears exactly once w/ regards to that picture.)

      Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison
      With all the time & energy I’ve saved not worrying about losing weight, I ended up treating my body better. And, ironically, losing weight.

      SHE. “LOVED”. THE. ARTICLE.
      Except that she didn’t.

      You know what D0nkey’s problem is? She doesn’t have a mind to make up.

  23. diluted brain says:

    Of course she knew by the second date that he was “the one”. I wonder how many guys she has labeled “the one”… 20?

    I really want to know what the catch is with this guy to put up with her? I also find it so bizarre that they are both joyfully unemployed. I could only imagine their day… wake up around noon, go for lunch, go to the gym / store, stare in the mirror, cook dinner or go out to eat then relax. Tough life.

    • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Mercedes C Class) says:

      Devin Stetler is just as shallow/delusional as she is. He wants to be on the TVs so he’s going to follow around a Donkey until he’s a LOLfamous as she is. Devin Stetler is also very dumb.

      • Jack the Bulldog says:

        Yes, Debby is a dum dum. Julie may be culturally illiterate but she’s actually managed to find someone dumber than herself and equally fame ho-ish to trot after her a la Lilly. Jacy’s gonna get that wedding!

        • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

          Only way Donkey gallops down the bridle path w/ Stevin Detler in tow is if there’s a reality film crew taping.

          That’s MY current speculation, anyway …

          • A-Game Content says:

            But who would watch? Bethenny and Kim from the Real Housewives each had a discernible fan base when they each got their wedding reality shows. A Donkey doesn’t have that does she?

            Also I know we all say we want to see a wedding but if A Donkey ever gets married (and obviously to a Donkey wedding > marriage, right?) I think she’ll fail at the wedding the way she fails at everything else. She’s not creative. It’ll be reductive, a hopeless blend of OMGUNIVERSITYCLUB and Burninglallllllla dances and not at all joyful or- dare I say it- authentic.

          • afghani says:

            bethenny had a fan base, kim just had a lot of people who wanted to gawk/point/enjoy some schadenfreud

          • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

            Guys.

            This is only as hard as the gay is for the d0nkey.

            No one would watch, hence no producer will ever greenlight such a farce, hence no Goat & D0nkey nuptials.

          • Factory Seconds says:

            There’s always Bridezillas.

    • Delurked says:

      maybe it’s just me, but it seems kind of bold/dumb to call someone “the one” when you a) aren’t engaged/married, or b) have only been dating for a few months…

  24. Barking Mad, Intel Advisor says:

    Miss Advised starts its run in my home and native land tonight. I will be watching Project Runway.

    • Spoutless Teapot says:

      Yay Canadians! I’m an expat. I feel like her publicist is getting her all this shit (WSJ etc) in hopes that the show really catches on in Canada.

      • Barking Mad, Intel Advisor says:

        I think the article, and everything else she is throwing out there these days, is about damage control. She keeps repeating how the show helped her so much and she’s all better now. She is looking for speaking and branding work.

        I don’t think the show will cause much of a ripple here, although she will probably find a few more fangirls. There are silly girls everywhere.

        • Who do you think you are? says:

          I think you’re on to something. She long ago burned all her writing/ talking head connections and reality tv spat her out, never to return. What has she got left?

  25. Don Quixote says:

    Bitch sounds super insecure in that video, just sayin’. If she’s trying to project a sense of confidence, a smile would have helped.

  26. Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

    the timeline with goat soap is just wonked up. on may 9, granny died and julia met goat soap; that very same day she was “in a relationship” on facebook. their fourth date, according to her twitter, was on may 18. how do you go from blind date on may 9 to date #4 in a week? and at first he was just her web developer, but you don’t go out on a blind date and then hire him to build your website… unless he already was, in which case they didn’t meet on may 9. when she posted his shirtless pic on may 19 he was still just her web dev, not “The OMG Boyfriend.” i just say.

    • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

      Which came first, the video or the blind date?

    • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

      Oh, eww. Following the shirtless web dev link now makes me think that Debbie has been hitting a meth pipe since he the d0nkey — from pecs & age-appropriate forehead to tuck-&-tape skeletor in dire need of botox is NOT a good look, monkey boy.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      She posted that “in a relationship” retroactively to May 9 the day after the last Miss Begotten broadcast, though.

    • Jelly Roll says:

      ah “Goat Soap” – have to say, I did love the original nom de guerre

  27. Downward Donk Downward Donk says:

    Longtime lurker, first time poster. I could not resist after noticing nobody mentioned how Julia differentiated between this season and all other imaginary seasons of her show. Because, you know, they’re definitely getting several more seasons, but THIS is the one where she focuses on her body through yoga. Namaste.

    • Blowjobs by Bravo says:

      I will hurt someone at Bravo if she gets a second season of that shit-t-astic show.

    • Leased D-Class TaskRabbit "boyfriend" (Formerly Floppy) says:

      I thought she was referring to fashion week seasons.

    • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

      [img]http://i45.tinypic.com/a5hrag.png[/img]
      Mess Despised; Season Only

  28. Fameless Shamewhore says:

    “Stetler, a technology entrepreneur, joined us”

    What the what?!?

    • Random Snowflake says:

      Flitting about the country with pointless travel and the lack of a job is the new “entrepreneur.”

  29. Mother Goose says:

    Isn’t she even more uncomfortable (even possible?) than usual in front of the camera or is it just me?!?

    • Stinky Velour Couture says:

      agreed—she’s really terrible in front of the camera!! still!!
      and was practically coughing up the word salad.
      And the make-up! ugh
      and the Chiclet Chompers! ugh
      None of this video is good.

      • Mother Goose says:

        whatever is going on with her, I don’t think she’s well.

        • Mother Goose says:

          or maybe it’s just a little more authenticity than she’s gotten us used to, without all the distraction tactics she’s been using before (being loud etc.).

  30. Mother Goose says:

    On another note, I happen to go to school with her friend Cailleach D Whatever, who is as insecure and inauthentic as her.

  31. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    The way she discusses how she looks at FW is batshit insane. She wears ridiculous costumes that mark her as a complete outsider, she is not a fashion journalist and she is not a star, but the problem is her legs?

  32. Dr. Gary says:

    Enlightened Yoga Julie is possibly the most insufferable Julie yet.

  33. EyeRoller says:

    What a dumb ho, Boo Boo.
    [img]http://i45.tinypic.com/9liera.jpg[/img]

  34. juliajane says:

    There’s something a little different about Julia in this video, she’s still very narcissistic but there’s a lack of aggression. I think her scheme juices boiled over and have temporarily immobilised her, hence her new Yoga Julia persona.

    • Tonyamichaela says:

      Maybe she started smoking the pot.

    • Peltergeist says:

      She’s very dulled down. I prefer this version of her because I really dislike her usual loud, hammy, brash on-camera persona, but there’s something off about it. Maybe it’s because she wasn’t in charge of editing this thing? (I refuse to call it a package or piece or any other term found in broadcast journalism.)

      • Powerful Moms with Fantastic Sons (aka Cindy M's Med Cab) says:

        Lithium?

        Seriously though, how does someone who claim she has all these insecurities about her body agree to do yoga for a post on the WSJ website in just a sports bra? Her stomach is actually fine and the very least of her problems, but for someone who claims to obsess over her body and worry that she looks pregnant, you think she’d have been aware of the fact that they do make full shirts you can still do yoga in. The chick in the white shirt and the instructor seem to realize this. They probably even sell them at her precious Lulu Lemon.

        • Queen Neferteeri says:

          She really doesn’t have those insecurities, but pretends to have them so that she can appear relatable and also to try to shame the haterz into shutting up.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            I totally agree. She thinks she’s awesome in every way, and claims to have insecurities so that people will stop being so mean to her by refusing to acknowledge her hot awesome brilliance. Remember — I am pretty sure she herself tipped us that her bulimia was back because we were going on about her puffy face. She will play any card, will sink to any depth, to get sympathy and try to silence her critics.

          • Blinking.SOS.at.the.Camera says:

            There are one or two places in that thing where she almost fake cries. Bish plz.

          • Jordache & the Pelts says:

            I hate it when she she always says she feels “HORRIFIC” about herself, this time referring to the scene at FW. Julia has no reason to be there.

            Julia has no business – or expertise, or anything of value to warrant attendence – at most of the events and conferences she’s been at in the past.
            now, the grifter events make sense….

          • Who do you think you are? says:

            Okay, you guys convinced me. I take back the nice things I said about her. Nice try, Donkey!

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            So much hyperbole re: “horrific.” Really, Donkey? You feel “horrific” because you’re sitting at Fashion Week watching skinny models? Try battling a real illness and not one of your self-imposed mental ones, or working for a living and having a shit day, or supporting an aging parent instead of constantly using yours as an ATM, or something that is actually REAL. Always with the hyperbole and the melodrama. Sit down, your problems are nothing, you dumb tool.

          • Jordache & the Pelts says:

            It is to say I feel “horrific” about myself watching the players at lacrosse match. I don’t know anything about lacrosse and I would have have no reason to be at a game, much less pretend to “cover” it, and I’m not a lacrosse player (or much of an athlete).
            Julia’s not beating herself up, she’s just fishing for validation or compliments as Jacy aptly pointed out.
            Julia threw “horrific” and similar terms around during Miss Advised when she was trying to justify her insane behavior and do damage control in her re re Elle “column” and Bravo blog. Speaking as a designer, if you have to explain it, it’s not working.

          • pearipathetic donkey says:

            Absolutely agree about her fake insecurities. If she was so insecure she wouldn’t be running around Black Rock City in bikinis.

          • Grifty Shades of Bray says:

            I think she is insecure about why she can’t get more people to like her. She has so little self-awareness about how she comes across to the vast majority of adjusted human beings. She thinks she should be likeable just because of her looks, which is why she keeps obsessing over her appearance.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            Yes.

          • Powerful Moms with Fantastic Sons (aka Cindy M's Med Cab) says:

            Tots agree with you all! I don’t love my upper arms, so I don’t wear sleeveless things without a cardigan or something. I would never voluntarily plaster pictures of my arms all over the internet!

            If she truly felt HORRIFIC about herself at fashion week, she wouldn’t go! She also wouldn’t have tried to build an entire career out of oversharing and faxuto shoots obviously! Ugh she is just the worst.

            Julia: you have a puffy, misshapen face. I can’t believe you paid somebody to make you look the way you do now. You have terrible, tacky style and you’re an embarrassment to your family, women, all the girls, Georgetown, America and the human race. You should feel horrific, because you’re a horrific human being, and not because there are skinnier women that you at fashion week. Which you have no business being at anyway.

          • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

            D0nkey has body image insecurities?

            Heh. I’m sure that the Getty photog whom she hunts down & endlessly contorts for at each & every NYFW would beg to differ.

  35. KS says:

    Julia Allison Julia AllisonVerified ‏@JuliaAllison
    I bow to the genius of my girl @Brit’s new DIY “BRIT KITS.” So amazing. http://t.co/2cHjrUmt

    Clicking through, we get this:

    What kind of DIY projects are these?

    Brit Kits will feature DIY projects ranging across our main categories. You can expect to see kits related to everything from home decor to food to fashion. It will be a surprise each time you open the box!

    What does it cost?

    Brit Kits are $19.99/month and can be canceled at any time.

    So for a subscription of $20/month, Brit (well, not her personally I’m sure) will mail you her used pantyhose? Killer deal man.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Just like every other demented Brit Morin project, it is stupid and derivative (craft box subscriptions were A Thing in, like, 2002).

    • Tingolayo says:

      Overuse of the words “genius” and “amazing” much? You can buy DIY kits at any craft store/museum shop/whatever. Oooh, but she’s mailing them! How environmentally friendly.

      If you’re too busy/over-scheduled/uncreative/uninterested to do it YOURSELF, just go to the store and buy the pot holder/tea cosy/headband/lanyard. Or maybe fly this Brit person to your house and she’ll make them for you while you watch.

    • afghani says:

      The GOMI thread about the Brit Kits is pretty good

    • A colossus of scheme juices and failure says:

      Every time I see one of Brit’s videos it makes me want to join the Taliban.

  36. How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

    Apparently whomever sells Julia Allison her fake twitter followers also translates her PR for her fans in the ‘stans? Here are some regurgitated highlights:
    _________________________________________________
    http://www.sportpointer.com/2012/10/01/julia-allison-of-miss-advised-does-yoga-to-stay-in-reality/

    “I was active in amicable media before amicable media was called amicable media,” she says. … She was ripping by boyfriends. … In 2009, Allison spent scarcely a month during an ashram in upstate New York and began to comprehend she was annoyed with a Big Apple. … She trafficked for 14 months and satisfied that she longed to live in a village that didn’t value thinness and career success above inner-beauty. She changed to Los Angeles. …

    As a vegan cook prepared snacks for Allison and her beloved Devin Stetler to suffer after a use during a unit of a crony they were crashing at, we ambled adult to a roof of with Aarona Pichinson, a crony of Allison’s who is a fanciful yoga instructor . Stetler, a record entrepreneur, assimilated us. He was sporting short-shorts and was being a unequivocally good sport, even reporting that it didn’t make him flounder to hear his lady crony tell a contributor that she knew by a second date that he was a one.

    … Allison is clearly a lady with a unequivocally open heart. Currently, it’s open for Stetler with whom she was set adult on a blind-date for May 9. Earlier that day, Allison’s grandmother died. Even in grief, she didn’t cancel. “I mislaid her in a morning and we found him in a evening,” she says.

    As a months hurl on, she finds him increasingly perfect. He meets so many of a 88 equipment on a list of must-have-attributes that she wrote a few years ago and afterwards published on Bravo’s website. They embody “loves me unconditionally,” “talented lover” and “will be on TV with me but throwing a large fit.”

    Either way, it’s a lot to consider about when you’re perplexing to change on one leg.

    • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

      THIS IS VERY STUFF.

      As a vegan cook prepared snacks for Allison and her beloved Devin Stetler to suffer after a use during a unit of a crony they were crashing at…

      She trafficked [as a mule] for 14 months and satisfied that she longed to live in a village…

      “I mislaid her in a morning and we found him in a evening,”

      Stetler, a record entrepreneur, assimilated us… it didn’t make him flounder to hear his lady crony [braying]

      it’s a lot to consider about when you’re perplexing to change on one leg.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      I love these things. It’s always hilarious when they keep your byline on them and your friends send them to you with “OMG WHAT IS GOING ON ARE YOU OK IDENTITY THEFT” messages of concern.

      He does indeed meet so many of the 88 equipment. Too bad she didn’t include “visible genitalia” among the equipment.

    • Norse Horse says:

      This translation has me howling. Thanks, Brayella! You are unequivocally a fanciful adult crony, I assimilate you amicable media.

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      “ripping by boyfriends…” Uh oh, was that a result of the BPC and green juice? Worrisome.

    • Braying Lady Crony [formerly Nameless Pasta Lover] says:

      DYING. This translation has me in tears. I just had to snatch up that user name. I really needed one!

      Thanks Brayella!

  37. Bravo's Bitch says:

    Things are popping again? I hope. Right now I am posting on the Cornell campus surrounded by youngsters staring at me because I’m laughing so hard and they are studying. If their studies go awry hopefully they won’t need to pull the fake date rape card. If so I may have to urinate on their dorm room door(hopefully painted pink).

  38. A colossus of scheme juices and failure says:

    (OT)
    ———————————
    Donkey’s Twitter feed:
    With all the time & energy I’ve saved not worrying about losing weight, I ended up treating my body better. And, ironically, losing weight.

    Transbraytion:
    I looked SO FAT in the Burning Man pictures that I got a friend of Devin (did you know I have A Boyfriend?? His name is Devin) to photoshop them to make me look thinner (I have a Boyfriend, BTW. We shared a home in Black Rock City. He is an entrepreneur).

    ———————–
    Oh, my… Veganyogaserenenamaste Donkey is going to be the most obnoxious incarnation of them all. The cuntitude will reach heights we never thought possible.

    We are in for a bumpy ride. Pass the popcorn, haters!

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      But Donkey, don’t you remember when you tipped Jacy off during the airing of MA that your bulimia is back? So glad that cleared up on its own!

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Her weight goes up and down in wild swoops. She looks so much thinner in that yoga video than she did in FW video; it can’t all have been the terrible grifted dresses, can it? In that one beige prom thing, she looked the heaviest I’ve ever seen her, probably a good 10 or 15 pounds bigger than in the yoga video. How can your weight change that much in a week?

      • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

        How can your weight change that much in a week?

        Fudge retention vs. BPC blowout?

      • A colossus of scheme juices and failure says:

        She looks pretty chunky in the yoga video. She looked a lot thinner in the photoshopped pictures of Burning Man.

        But enough obsessing about her weight: let’s concentrate on what a horrible human being she is!

  39. ceeza says:

    is she going to become a health/nutrition/fitness expert/writer next?

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Oh, please. That would be magnificent. Sweet mother of Greg, I want to see her try that.

      • SirClompsAlot says:

        Maybe that was the big career epiphany she tweeted the night before flying home to pick up her dad$er’s check.

  40. EyeRoller says:

    There’s so much to choose from in that WSJ yoga article (http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2012/10/01/julia-allison-of-miss-advised-does-yoga-to-stay-in-reality/):

    “Stetler, a technology entrepreneur, joined us. He was sporting short-shorts and was being a very good sport, even asserting that it didn’t make him squirm to hear his girl friend tell a reporter that she knew by the second date that he was the one.”

    She knew he was “the one” because he’s probably the first “the one” who didn’t demand a blowjob by the second date. Also, how the author separated the words “girl” and “friend”? And I read elsewhere online (http://www.katherinerosman.com/the-author/) that the author worked for Elle magazine a long time ago, so maybe it was just a casual, uberlimber encounter between two surious journalists, who both happen to be former Elle employees (Correction: 1 former Elle employee and 1 former Elle.com “freelance web contractor”)?

    AND let’s not forget– The fact that I’m taking this all sooooo suriously is very troublesome.

    • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

      the author worked for Elle magazine a long time ago, so maybe it was just a casual, uberlimber encounter

      I’m wondering if it wasn’t pre-arranged half a year ago or more, based on Mass DoughRised initially being set to air this fall, & it was upheld since the episodes are just now playing (braying?) in Canada …

    • Effing Ineffably Un-Effable says:

      Calling yourself an entrepreneur doesn’t mean you are one. Name a single venture that you have started that has additional full-time employees. Go on, I’m waiting.

      Oh, there aren’t any?

      Then you’re a contractor.

      Nothing wrong with that in this town. But DS is less on the radar of tech or any well-connected people in LA than JA is in either fashion or journalism. LA tech is a smaaalll world and his name hasn’t come up ever.

      Oh PS, JAB, lean is the go-to model for new startups these days which means that no one’s taking huge checks. Just FYI. It’s kind of about the business these days, which if little DS knew the slightest thing, he would have passed on.

  41. How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

    We should draw up a hoofball pot & wager on what D0nkey’s spin will be & who she’ll send press releases to, once she & Debbie Seltzer officially end this amazeballz charade …

  42. Grifty Shades of Bray says:

    Idiot Donktard took a FW picture with Fern Mallis once. I wonder if she has ever contemplated why Fern’s FW experience is never ruined by body image insecurities.

    • Tingolayo says:

      Fern Mallis, Glenda Bailey, Grace Coddington, Anna Wintour… they’re all super young and/or super tiny!

      • How Brayella got Her Hoove Back says:

        I googled Fern Mallis when I read GS0B’s comment this morning, & I have to say, she looks neither tiny nor young, much less super of either.

  43. Mooch says:

    New roommate! And she calls Debbie her partner, wtf?

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Saw that. Amber Rae or someone? Moving in with Donks and her “partner, Devin Stetler”

      Gross.

    • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

      where is this, facebook? screencap pls?

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        facebook

        Julia Allison
        41 minutes ago
        Amber Rae is moving in with me – and my partner Devin Stetler – for the next two months in Marina del Rey. A fall of delicious adventure and inspiring growth awaits!!
        Like · Share
        13 people like this.

        Julia Allison And bike rides and yoga and whiteboards and Devin-cooked meals and dreams.
        40 minutes ago · Like · 3

        Julia Allison All the things that make life good!
        40 minutes ago · Like · 3

        Amber Rae YAYYYYYY! So excited.
        39 minutes ago · Like

        Andy Drish oh my god… you and Amber Rae?? i hope your place is big enough to contain all the energy that will be present from you two together…

        A rae – no more boulder? no more morning workouts together? i’ll be getting back to boulder next week. let’s grab tea if you’re still in town.
        36 minutes ago · Like · 1

        Amber Rae WAIT! Andy + Julia – how do you two know each other???
        35 minutes ago · Like

        Andy Drish we kind of kept popping up on each others radar

        love conference + burning man + my friend was her intern

        Small world!! :D
        31 minutes ago · Like

        Arax-Rae Van Buren Amber Rae when I saw your status I had a feeling it was with Julia Allison! So jealous of the fun you both are going to have. xx
        28 minutes ago · Like · 2

        Libby Payne Holy cow will you two throw a slumber party blowout?! Please?!
        27 minutes ago · Like · 1

        • Frequent Liar Miles says:

          The resurfacing of Anthrax! How we’ve missed her!

        • KS says:

          Sounds like Donkey needs help paying the rent.

        • Jack the Bulldog says:

          The lovely Ms. Amber Rae (sounds like an Irish setter) runs “a real-life school for superheroes.” Such motivational claptrap is up Donk’s dumb alley.

          • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

            i’ll bet fuck you pennies that donkey will be one of the participants at amber rae’s bold academy in SF this fall.
            life acceleration, wtf is that? hurtling toward death?!

        • New Year New You says:

          Wait, did I miss a chapter? When did Doughballs Stetler move in? To the home they shared together?

          • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

            we all missed that chapter.
            farewell toilet julia/flusher price, we hardly knew ye. when you get a chance, please do post that music video of yours that stars big julia. oh, it’s in the queue? no worries, we’ll wait!
            and how odd that both are still listed as living at the condo on airbnb.

            KISS OF DEATH RIGHT HERE

            [img]http://distillery.s3.amazonaws.com/media/2011/08/29/3bb4aebb80344233b3e1a4a75284665a_6.jpg[/img]

          • idiotbox says:

            Frogive me, if I sound like a bigot, but isn’t moving in together immediately after doing it a traditional thing to do for lesbians to do?

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