Lately, I have nary a care when it comes to our stupid, fat, busted retard Julia Allison, because, my Greg, she is just so, so incapable of functioning like a sane normal human being anymore that it’s just BOOOOOOOOOOOOORING. It’s like, “Hey, look! It’s me being an asshole at Burning man! Now here’s me being an asshole at Fashion Week! Lena Dunham, let’s be friends because we’re both fat now! I have never seen Girls and I break Tiny Furniture when I sit on it. Oh and have you heard? I have a boyfriend now who can’t keep his hands off of me! I have achieved EVERYTHING I WANTED IN THE WORLD!” Well, good for you, dumb ass. I hope that makes the salmon burger extra satisfying. We’ve been here before. We don’t have to do it again.
But, alas, this was too rich to pass up, just because it broke the pathetic scale. I’ll let you commenters do my work for me.
Longtime lurker, wanted to pass along this post from SFist where they’re discussing a blind item from Eater SF about a diva customer trying to play the “don’t you know who I am card” at a local restaurant that sounds exactly like Julia Allison Baugher behavior:
There was this girl in the Marina location one time who was demanding that I seat her because she was on a reality show on Bravo, on like a dating show. I can’t remember the name. It was a bachelorette type show and she said, ‘Do you know who I am?’ and I said, ‘I don’t. I’m sorry.’ I told her she would have to wait like everyone else.
Of course, it’s only a blind item because even the restauranteur didn’t recognize her. And so far nobody has actually thought to mention her in any comments. Which may actually be the greatest of all shades to throw.
And what do you know? Look who randomly appeared in the comments of a local blog for a city that she is neither lives in nor is currently visiting:
So … this does sound like something stupid I would have pulled in a moment of idiocy, but (to the best of my knowledge) I’ve never been to this restaurant. Although I guess I could have forgotten. Hmm. If I did, I was an asshole. I hope I didn’t do this.
Christ what an asshole.