Julia’s Manager Pretty Much Sums up RBD

P.S. Remember his notes on Julia’s “writing” from Miss Advised episode 3?
“My life is a mess…Whiny bitch spoiled…Tarot card reading – who cares?”

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396 Responses to Julia’s Manager Pretty Much Sums up RBD

  1. One Fat Melman says:

    I can hear it now…”Steeee-Vennnnnnn!!”

    Laguna Beach? Anyone? Bueller?

    • Factory Seconds says:

      Like.

    • Psychotic Today says:

      LOVE.

    • maid of dishonor says:

      <3

    • messicascliponbangs says:

      +1

    • OMGMarried! says:

      We are DUNZO, Steeeee-VEHNNNNNN!

    • Hunter Gorham says:

      PS Nice face, you stupid bitch.

    • Bear Draggie Breakfast says:

      “That was so dumb, Steeee-vennnn, you didn’t even look like a bear.”

      • A-Game Content says:

        <3

      • One Fat Melman says:

        She just had a baby and I can’t wait for her to book a new tv show. “Cammmmm-dennnnnn!!” It’s like she tried the Steven test on every name they liked to pick the perfect one.

        • Bear Draggie Breakfast says:

          I love that Kristin ended up with Jay Cutler, the ugly and underwhelming football player that Donk tried to hype Page 6 about (“What blind item?!”). I have a feeling Jay Cutler was Never The Donkey.

          • A Donkey is an Ass says:

            Easy tiger. Cutler is not an underwhelming QB. The kid can flat out play.

            But there’s absolutely no way he ever rode a Donkey. Ugly or not, he’s a professional athlete making millions of dollars. He’s had better options.

          • LTL says:

            Deadspin had this to say about Cutler:

            http://deadspin.com/5935713/why-your-team-sucks-2012-chicago-bears

            2. Cutlerfucker. Remember, he’s not actually a human being. He’s a housecat in disguise. Jay Cutler makes McKayla Maroney look enthusiastic. His joylessness actually shows up on meteorological charts. You’ll notice that no one has ever said of Jay Cutler: “Oh, he’s a great guy once you get to know him. He’s not sulky like that in real life!” Cutler is the rare public figure whose true identity perfectly matches his perceived identity: pouty, mopey, indifferent, shitty. He leads this team with all the excitement of an eighth grader stuck in study hall. . . .

            etc.

            When I read that, and the emphasized portion specifically, I thought, “What a great description of our Donkey”.

  2. And did you see the Timothy Sykes BS she’s tweeting about? (ss/sf if this was covered already) I can’t believe that such sexist swill is getting her public brays.

    • Malformed Face says:

      WHY ARE YOU NOT SUPPORTIVE OF AN OPPORTUNITY FOR ALL THE GIRLS TO GET NAKED AND MAYBE WIN A TRIP TO THE MALDIVES?????? (or Vegas)

      • Donkey of Perdition says:

        “we have big plans for Miss Penny Stock”. I thought she was just trying buddy up to a wallet. Apparently, she is part of this shitshow either as a shill or whatever the fuck someone would pay her for. She is trying to convince other women to whore themselves out, wear skimpy clothing, maybe do a lap dance, for the sexual gratification of fratty rich old men. Her stupid sycophants try to emulate her, this is why she is dangerous, turning perfectly stupid suburban teenagers into soft-core porn talent.

    • Fameless Shamewhore says:

      This was discussed in the last thread, but I’m really glad you brought it up. I know, I know, I know Donkey has no moral compass and no *actual* principles…but still…even very very recently she was dusting off the old “I-want-to-help-young-women” mantra, so does she not see that this is the actual opposite of what she is pretending to believe in? That this is surely the exact attitude that she would be fighting against IF she really believed her whole feminism-schtick.

      It’s really not so much that she doesn’t believe in anything that amazes me – it’s that she is too lazy to remember and even pretend to follow through on her “issues”.

      • Don Quixote says:

        I honestly don’t think her brain is even capable of that depth – to actually see that this miss pussy stock goes wildly against her so called *feminist* attitude. IMO she just wanted to tweet the words “my favorite millionaire” to show off, when really, almost everyone knows a millionaire these days.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      What a proud fucking feminist. Look at the photo. I guess it’s important that the “beautiful ladies” have fuck-me looks on their faces and one is feeling up another. She is such a complete goddamn fraud. This is the chick who went ballistic re: Obama Girl. Jesus.

      http://www.misspennystock.com/#

      • Jelly Roll says:

        that is vomitous – those girls looking like underage runaways forced into prostitution

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          I know. It is fucking gross. And Gloria Steinem is a role model. She read Ms. magazine as a child. She wants to help ALL THE GIRLS. What a total fucking fraud — she sells her soul for a quick buck. But she makes six figures, of course. Liar fraud liar fraud fuckhead fraudulent liarfuckface.

      • EyeRoller says:

        I could care less who shakes their tit-tays for a five figure contest prize (go golddiggers go!), I even appreciate that the two middle models from that promo photo look like Amy Fisher and Blake Lively impersonators standing in front of Grauman’s Chinese Theater on Hollywood Blvd., but I’m with you– Why does Donk preach one thing like “feminism” and then hype this sort of junk? The wall hanging behind the models in the photo reminds me of an oversized headboard on an orgy-sized bed in a brothel.

        My problem is that she represents herself as a branding aficionada but she is so haphazard with her own messages.
        I know I know– Rent’s due, and tutus and legwarmers ain’t free…

        • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant (almost a transitive-property) says:

          Cheesy Skillets don’t pay the entire rent, apparently.

          • EyeRoller says:

            Velveeta check only covered water company and half of her Internet bill.

          • Hunter Gorham says:

            Julia is so fucking annoying with her “Gotta pay the bills!” bullshit. Like she gets paid by anybody to cover Fashion Week. Or to be a Facebook Picture Consultant. Or a Branding Expert.

            I can’t wait until you blow all of your inheritance in less than a year, you stupid cunt.

        • Tingolayo says:

          Yeah, aside from the whole “women as bikini-clad mascots” thing– posing in bikinis can be a paid job, after all– is the idea that they’ve won this great opportunity, whereas you know that they’ll have to put up with all sorts of unpaid crap because they get to “feel glamorous” and “travel.” How can you complain about anything when Timothy and Julia are “giving” you this great “opportunity”? (It’s like “interning” on Gallery Girls.)

          PS Why is Julia so up this Timothy guy’s butt?

        • Convenient Feminist says:

          Did someone ring me? I feel like I’ve been rung.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        So, if any Miss Penny Stock candidates happen to Google their way here:

        Ladies, there are infinitely better and less creepy promotional modeling jobs to be had with no Pillsbury Douchebro involved. There are plenty of legit agencies with professional promotional modeling gigs for car shows, boat shows, computer shows, you name it. Don’t waste your time with King Penny Stock’s dumbass contest.

      • Queen Neferteeri says:

        Looks like a Staten Island brothel.

  3. Don Quixote says:

    Alright, if she truly believes that… she just allowed us free reign to speak our “truth” about how horrible of a person she is! Thanks Julia!

  4. Malformed Face says:

    “40 pounds heavier, older, midwest” was my fav!!!! Steven Grossman 4-Eva!!!!

  5. Factory Seconds says:

    Can you even imagine being Steven Grossman?

    • Malformed Face says:

      No. No. I cannot. Steven Grossman has to deal with a Donkey on a daily basis.

      I would like an Excel spreadsheet of the number of hours he has had to deal with a bat shit Donkey vs. the 10% pittance he gets for stuff like Miss Advised. So. Not. Worth. It.

      I’m sure he’s happy she’s left town for a week so people can stay at her apartment and pay her rent only to then leave for Burning Man for a week. Way to capitalize on those Miss Advised LOLopportunities.

      • Who do you think you are? says:

        Problem is, she would do her best to try to ruin him if he ever nevered the Donkey. She’s his client and he has no choice but to grin & bear it.

        Then again, she has little power or credibility. Also, I’m sure Hollywood managers are used to asshole clients.

        • Malformed Face says:

          He is way more powerful than she is.

          She is the type of client you never fire but slowly let fade away.

          • Factory Seconds says:

            Oh, like they did with me when I worked at ALDO. Man, those were the weeks.

          • Bear Draggie Breakfast says:

            This. He’s not going to fire her because he’s making a little money off her, but she’s not at the top of his priority list. She doesn’t make enough for him to return her calls and emails in a timely manner.

  6. Zandra says:

    Is this the guy who got the monogrammed gift?

  7. Scooby Don't says:

    Steven! Gross, man!

  8. Julia's Authentic Pelts says:

    his “bitch-please” faces were the best thing about Miss Advised. His scene with her where they discuss her column and her speaking with Page Six was so priceless.

  9. Sake Bombardier says:

    I’m so confused. I thought these were the notes from the Elle guy? Kenneth? (I know, calm down.)

  10. i may or may not have blown jellyd says:

    last sentence – girl be good at dating & bad at relationships, exs. no shit!

  11. Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

    If she types “the Playa” one more time, my head will explode. Can she not just ask: “When are you getting to Burning Man?” No no no. “When will I see you on the capital-P Playa??” Always such a pretentious tool about the dumbest shit.

    Remember: “There is no judgment in Black Rock City?”

    She was insufferable last year — this year’s going to be chockful of goodness too.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      this year’s going to be chockful of goodness too

      I know, right?
      Can’t wait to see Goat Soap on a leash, wearing @LillyDog’s old costumes!

    • Malformed Face says:

      PS, there is a new pic of Goat Soap on her FB and he’s looking kind of “special”

    • These Hooves Were Made for Walking says:

      Last year was exceptionally great weather on the Playa, but this year is supposed to be exceptionally bad. Like total whiteout. Like, nobody will be able to see her off the rack strippergear through the eyeball and skin-burning dust storm.

      http://blog.burningman.com/2012/08/playa-tips/its-a-dusty-one-folks/

      • Gummy Rictus of Love says:

        Epic comment on that burning man page about how the Donkey-type poseurs are ruining the event:
        What I suspect that people are angry about is the proliferation of new people that come to the burn just as spectators. They pay people to produce an experience for them. I have been seeing more and more services over the years being offered to wealthy people where they will set up your camp, bring food, bicycles even costumes for you. All you have to do is show up. These people fly in on Thursday, take it all in from a distance and leave without barely even speaking to others outside their camp. I know this because a camp I was part of years ago became one of these VIP camps. It’s just another stop on the jet set party train for some which is contrary to the Burning Man philosophy. The beauty of Burning Man is getting your hands dirty. Of immersing yourself in the culture, the people and the music and finding a way to participate. If you are new then find a way to give back. If you are fortunate enough to be wealthy, then donate to an art project. Give back.

        The dust looks to be heavy and thick this year. Could be very disappointing for the sparkle princess. Heh.

        • MissAssvice says:

          She is going to bitch and moan about sand in every crack and crevice. Monsoons are going to kick her ass.

        • Bear Draggie Breakfast says:

          Exactly. Real Burners don’t go on Facebook and talk about how they paid somebody $1750 to get all their Burning Man shit together for them. They get together with their friends and DIY their costumes and accessories. Now that Donkey’s been to Burning Man, she can just say, “Yeah, I’ve been,” and leave it at that. None of this Playa braying all over Facebook and Twitter.

  12. Barking Mad, Intel Advisor says:

    OT but there’s a Guide for Noobs on the header now! This is a great idea.

    Mcakez, that was some masterful writing about the Donkey’s past and why we’re here. I’m glad it’s being showcased and made so accessible for newbies.

    • Who do you think you are? says:

      I love it. Also, when the trolls/white knights try to engage, we can just point to that link and ignore them until they grow some sense.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        I love that idea too — someone (“Paging Afghani!”) can get their “first!!!1!” out of their system by being the first (& only) to direct trolling white nits to it, & then radio silence going forward, yes?

        • CDB says:

          Too late ….. I did my circle of defecation over there. And I saw no mention of the kitteh enforcer in the annals even though he has retired.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            even though he has retired

            ‘… has retired is on sabbatical …’

            FTFY ;-)

          • CDB says:

            Correct. Thank you Brayella. AK has been feeling Feisty ( a very sexy lady cat) and this therapy has enabled him to recover from the insults thrown his way. He expects to be making sporadic appearances in flagrant cases of stupidity. That is all .

    • Tingolayo says:

      Cool. The more I read, the more I “get it.” Just from watching Miss Advised, I’d wondered about possible traits of a personality disorder (e.g., mirroring other people; unstable career and relationships; delusional; grandiosity; must be center of attention; thinks others should take care of/be responsible for her; lack of boundaries; oversharing; sense of entitlement; manipulative; trying to “create” reality; etc.) Now I see that it’s not just me.

      • Donkarena says:

        Excellent list of her odd behaviors — spot on. Some I hadn’t thought of before, but upon seeing your list I say “yes!” to every one. Those are the almost imperceptible ways that she annoys the person watching her for the first time. You don’t quite know why yet, but your instincts are telling you something is WRONG with this chick!

    • mcakez: Strange Puss = Sexually Delicious! says:

      Holy shit! *honest blush* I feel so blessed! Like, really. I didn’t prepare a speech, so I just want to thank Greg, Chad Lowe, and most importantly JP, Jacy, and FC for helping to make this happen, and always believing in me. I love you all!

      • mcakez: Strange Puss = Sexually Delicious! says:

        I forgot to thank someone: Thank you Donkey, for being an eternal asshole and bringing us all together.

        I am so, so blessed.

        Now where is my fucking tiara?

        • MissAssvice says:

          Your tiara was stolen by an ass and taken to Burning Man. Please retrieve it from the donkey on the playa hehehe

  13. Malformed Face says:

    It’s 6:09am, Donkey just tweeted 24 minutes ago.

    PS, Donkey!

    • Psychotic Today says:

      Her face wouldn’t be so tragic if she just got some sleep.

      • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant (almost a transitive-property) says:

        I dunno, the other Batman villains have fucked up faces, too. Maybe she’s trying to fit in and be a profeshional illegitimate business laydee.

      • virgil reid says:

        last week i got two hours of sleep a few nights in a row and all i kept thinking was (and to quote jacy), how i had pisshole eyes like julia allison.

        • I cried on Monday night, and woke up Tuesday morning lookin like I got into a fight, my eyes were all puffy underneath. I made sure I went to bed earlier last night, lest I face another JA day.

          • Catfish & Sweet Potatoes For Dessert says:

            I hope you were cry over something really worthwhile, like other people’s wedding videos. (Sorry you had reason to cry. I hope things are better.)

          • Catfish & Sweet Potatoes For Dessert says:

            or “crying”

          • Ugh. I wish it were over other people’s wedding videos! Then I could at least be able to laugh at myself for being a stupid ass.

            It’s a combo of hormones, uncertainty, and feeling like I’m at a crossroads.

          • darling dearest says:

            I cried last night (bawled, really) and woke up today looking like a puffy faced loon. I thought of dear jules.

          • She is ever present in our thoughts during our most puffy moments.

            JA is the mascot of puffy facedness.

            *hugs catfish and darlingdearest* Let’s all have a good cry, but remember an ice mask afterward!

  14. Donkarena says:

    Another peek behind the curtain, revealing that there is absolutely no substance to this chick.

  15. EyeRoller says:

    “Calm down Kev– er, I mean, Steven!”

  16. Dr. Gary says:

    Um…who broke the internet? Thank Greg it wasn’t me this time.

  17. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    JULIA ALLISON, THANK YOU!
    Have any of you watched Bravo’s new series Miss Advised? If not, you MUST watch. It’s about three relationship experts who are learning to take their own advice. One of the experts, Julia Allison (once dating Jack McCain), is from Wilmette and I instantly related with her while watching the show. Any of you that know me pretty well know that I have an obsession with celebrities, so I felt like I needed to contact her and just tell her how inspiring she was! I e-mailed her last night…and SHE RESPONDED THIS MORNING. Literally, obsessed with her. Her e-mail was so sweet! She even said I could do her hair the next time she’s back home (she has amazing hair, by the way.)

    So. Weird.

    I’ve been on this stylist’s site / sight / cite before (has some great upsweep hairdids for weddings) & went back today to find what I’d bookmarked for a friend … WHOA!

    ‘amazing hair’ indeed.

    • fig says:

      I think the creepiest here is that she actually uses the McCain thing as a reference. Because clearly, if a McCain showed her his bits, she must be legit!

      • Donkarena says:

        I think it’s despicable the way she keeps braying about Jack McCain. The guy is the adult son of a “celebrity”, not the actual celebrity. The guy is living his life and serving his country. His father is well known, but Jack is not. He has no control over the fact of who he was born to. For her to latch onto his celebrity-one-generation-removed is really crass. Leave the guy and his family alone.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      I am constantly amazed at Julie’s hair. But not in the good way.

    • EyeRoller says:

      –”I have an obsession with celebrities, so I felt like I needed to contact her”
      Why would you contact her if you’re obsessed with celebrities? No one famous will even speak to her. A famous joke, yes, but celebrity she is not.

      –”I e-mailed her last night…and SHE RESPONDED THIS MORNING.”
      Correction: She probably responded at 4:45am after being up all night maxing out her Discover card on various Burning Man party favor websites.

      –”She even said I could do her hair the next time she’s back home (she has amazing hair, by the way.)”
      Well how generous of Donk, offering to “let” someone do her hair for free (or at best a tweet tradeoff). But you needn’t wait for her to return to Chicago, Miss Donk lovin’ hairdresser. Hell, you don’t even have to be in the SAME ROOM to do Donk’s AMAZING hair because all you’ll be doing is dyeing and blow drying a moldy pile of horsetail extensions. Yes, amazing indeed.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        Unless re-runs of Miss Despised are being run, it already reads like a trade-off written by none other than D0nkey (YooHoo, Jack! Jack McCain! We shared a home, remember?)

        WHAT? exactly was this twit inspired by D0nkey to do, I wonder …

        • KS says:

          Seriously, after you’ve read enough dribble [sic] by Julia Allison, you can recognize it.

          This is a 8/10 on my donk-o-meter.

          What inspired her? FREE HAIRCUTZ?

      • Andy Wintour hacks (up a furball) says:

        ”She even said I could do her hair the next time she’s back home”

        Oh, don’t worry honey, you can also:
        – move her boxes
        – walk her dog
        – pick flowers from your</i. garden for her home
        – hang her curtains

        …and maybe you'll get a slightly used Halloween costume out of the deal.

    • Catfish & Sweet Potatoes For Dessert says:

      It *is* a miracle of modern chemistry and a triumph of body dysmorphia over the power of sight/site/cite.

    • KS says:

      One blogger likes that post. A 16 year old kid in Denmark.

      I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

    • A colossus of scheme juices and failure says:

      Do you know who else had an obssession with celebrities?
      [img]http://i50.tinypic.com/dxlr7t.jpg[/img]

  18. SirClompsAlot says:

    Sorry if someone posted this already, but did you see this:

    http://gawker.com/5936691/this-couple-would-like-for-strangers-to-pay-for-them-to-have-over-30-different-exotic-weddings-please

    Our donks is gonna be pissed she didn’t think of this first (actually she probably thought of it but hasn’t been able to get a guy to do it)

  19. KS says:

    Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison

    One thing occurs to me as I walk through downtown LA’s dilapidated storefronts: there’s no way we need to manufacture all this crap.

    3 Retweets
    2 Favorites
    12:40 PM – 22 Aug 12 via Echofon

    So she favorited her own tweet like a fucking dipshit and someone else did too? Was it this person?

    Emily Skinner ‏@emmyk818
    @JuliaAllison There’s one thing that hits me when I read the majority of your tweets-I need to read a dictionary more often! ;) #vocabprobs

    She has her “Made in America” and “manufacturing all this crap” really mixed the fuck up. ITS MADE IN CHINA ASSHOLE!

    “Oooooo I’m gonna dance in a fucking desert with skimpy clothes on I care about the environment soooooooo much now…”

    DIA(forest)F.

    • KS says:

      I’d like to favorite this too, under “Favorite Stupidest Tweets by Julia Allison”

    • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

      i know we’ve said this a million times, but she is a goddamn moron. english, motherfucker, do you speak it?! you can’t walk through the dilapidated storefronts unless you are the fucking invisible man! and if the storefronts are dilapidated (=vacant, closed??), surely that means they are devoid of CRAP to sell!
      also, what was it, less than three days ago she’s braying about technicolor tutu legwarmers = the very definition of manufactured CRAP.
      also, is this like her first time setting foot somewhere other than her stupid condo? welcome to 21st century america, julia. we used to have this thing called the auto industry and this place called detroit. go check it out sometime, it’s like the new disneyland. fucking clueless rube.

      • KS says:

        And if it’s not enough that she is walking through buildings, people are complimenting her on her usage of a eighty-dollar word like dilapidated? GTFO.

        THREE FUCKING DAYS FROM RAINBOW TUTU LEGWARMERS PEOPLE.

        Let’s not be too harsh on her, I’m sure she is in the nitty gritty ultra-urban city doing research for her job/book, right?

        • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

          the more edgy and completely unlikely explanation is that she’s scoring pills on skid row for burning man. you know her references to OMG CRACK! and “the pot” come from some deep tripping.

          • Albie Quirky says:

            I am sick as a dog today and it hurts when I laugh, but even so thank you for reminding me of “the pot,” dear Prof.

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        My guess is she’s staying with goat soap in his dirty hood.

        • KS says:

          FOREVER.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

          The box on the sidewalk that they shared

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          Of course, because she is hard up for cash and renting out the Marina Del Bray condo for a drastically reduced price because she makes six figures, y’all, and it’s totally normal when you make six figures to vacate your home for a month and rent it out to strangers. Lying asshole fraudulent fuckface liar fuck.

          • Andy Wintour hacks (up a furball) says:

            It’s not even her home, though, so it’s easier. Think about it. I’d rent out the home that wasn’t mine and make money off of it cause I don’t give a shit either. It’s the perfect grifter deal. Ok, not really, cause I actually would give a shit enough not to be shady, but…fucking hell.

      • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

        “You can’t walk through the dilapidated storefronts unless you are the fucking invisible man!”

        The invisible man could not walk through storefronts either. You just couldn’t see him if he tried.

        Godzilla is the chap you’re thinking of.

        #famousmonstersoffilmlandcertifiednerd

      • THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS

        Joolie:

        1) You can’t walk through a storefront. You can walk through a shopping district. You may be a donkey in a china shop, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to wall through the wall to get in.

        2) Look up dilapidated, it doesn’t mean what you think it does.

        3) Your wardrobe is the definition of mass produced crap.

        4) and please TAKE SEVERAL SEATS because I know you patted yourself on the back when some stan said she needs a dictionary to read your tweets. HOPEFULLY she’ll look up the words she didn’t understand before and realize you’re a moron, but she probably won’t because people who like you are lacking in brain cells.

      • Norse Horse says:

        Sing it, Professor (and KS too). She’s an absolute idiot about everything, who mangles language at every turn. No fucking idea about the state of the world she lives in, but calls herself a journalist and a writer. Incurious, dumb as rocks. Atta girl.

    • CaptainGary says:

      Fuck this bitch – DTLA is in the midst of a serious revitalization and those who work and live down here are increasingly proud of the leaps and bounds it’s made in the past 10 years. It’s filled with vibrant sub-communities – Little Tokyo (awesome), the Arts District (great new stuff), the Flower District, the Toy District – that are filled with things you just can’t get anywhere else, not to mention legitimate architectural landmarks like Walt Disney Concert Hall and the awesome Old Bank District, with 1910s-20s construction.

      Is it Marina del Rey? No, and those who spend time down here are glad it’s not. For a long time, it seemed as though LA was running away from its own history and now it’s finally embracing it. The best – THE BEST – neighborhoods in LA are filled with construction as old as the late 1800s (hey, that’s old for LA), whereas Marina del Rey is a soulless 1980s/90s corporate landscape.

      And what the fuck is she even referring to when she talks about what we need and don’t need to manufacture? She’s the one buying shitty one-off costumes – is she suggesting that we don’t need to manufacture here in the USA what they sell in DTLA? Or is she just trying to get all deep and shit because she’s getting ready to go to the “playa?” Or maybe, just maybe, she’s subtly ragging on “the boy” for living downtown instead of near her.

      Either way, fuck this bitch and complete lack of understanding about her surroundings.

      • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

        I LOVE downtown LA.

        The Bradbury Building

        The largest concentration of historic movie theaters in the world

        Grand Central market

        The Eastern Building

        And new museum development that will put most similar districts the world over in the shade.

        Check out my favorite building in LA:

        http://www.losangelestheatre.com/laphot02.html

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        But, but … Juie loves architecture!
        She brayed at architecture profs & everything!

      • The Purloined Tiara says:

        Yeah, “we” don’t need to manufacture it, so I guess she can quit her job in the factory now.

      • mcakez: Strange Puss = Sexually Delicious! says:

        Ding-a-ling. She is trying on her ‘eco-conscious’ face because she is about to get in touch with the land and positivity and soul-harmony by going out to THE PLAYA. She can bring her $500 charm bracelet, Che necklace, and brand new stripper clothes out with her so everyone knows she is down with radical self-expression and body celebration and quality ass manufactured shit like tutus and feathers plucked from caged animals. *hippie gang signs* Don’t forget she is personally helping to express the spirit of freedom and non-useless crap by sending out little pods with the human body reformed in unicorn shaped plastic (tots great for enviro, ya’ll) through her awesome camp that she helped conceptualize, engineer, build, promote and break down.

        She will see you out at the Esplanade, y’all. She will be the one wearing PINK! and a TUTU! and awesome FURRY BOOTS and making sure everyone knows how bad consumerism is, and, like, how defunky the whole LA scene is, because sweatshops are gross, and stuff, so buy all USA made, and make peace with your soul. If you have a penny to spare, buy a stock, since you could be the next Miss Money Penny Stock Advised. Or, you know, tots cool legwarmers made from ethically grown polyester fishnet (no real catfish harmed in the creation, tots produced at a humane plastic manufacturary) legwarmers!

      • EyeRoller says:

        @captaingary– I loved your entire entry, but you could’ve stopped after the first three words and I still would’ve been satisfied: Fuck. This. Bitch.

      • Cowboys & Brayliens says:

        Cheers to this. In the past ten years, downtown has made some massive, massive improvements. It’s very rapidly turning into a great destination for weekend activities, etc., alongside the massive amount of population shift that happens every single day.

        MOCA, Grand Central market, the Japanese bookstore in Onizuka plaza, it’s really a shame that Donk feels the need to hit up DirtyHippieVille in order to feel some sense of culture when it’s right in her goddamned back yard.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      I bet she’s talking about Santee Alley or all the Latino storefronts that you can find all over downtown LA. Typical dumb Julie ignorant/racist comment.

      Yeah, fuck all those poors who can’t afford to buy *real* designer clothing, bags, shoes, etc.

      • pearipathetic donkey says:

        That’s what I was thinking. To Donkey dilapidated = where the brown poor people buy things.

    • Leased D-Class TaskRabbit Boyfriend (formerly Floppy) says:

      But we HAVE to, what else is Dr.Bobby going to inject into your face then?!

    • Actual Shower Vommer says:

      We only “manufacture so much crap” because dipshits like you buy it.

  20. ShesJustStupid says:

    Did anyone else notice that she’s plugging drug and drinking hangover helpers on her fb? Donks is gona do some trippin’!

    • Dr. Gary says:

      For fuck’s sake. She went to Burning Man ONE TIME and now she thinks she’s an ‘expert’? Idiot.

      • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

        I never went, but how many times do you have to go before you realize: “hey, it’s hot and dusty and everyone is naked and annoying and at the end they set fire to a huge wooden man yay peace love harmony clean air?”

        Seems like the one time would pretty much nail it for me.

        • Catfish & Sweet Potatoes For Dessert says:

          You learn faster than A Donkey. Which is to say, you learn.

          • Gummy Rictus of Love says:

            It’s an exhibitionist’s paradise, so she’ll be in her element. Funny thing is that she looks like she’s in her 40s now so it might be a rude awakening for her that her expiration has become a self-fulfilling prophecy. I mean, seriously, grow the fuck up.

        • Queen Neferteeri says:

          But your way, RRR, doesn’t allow room for pretentious declarations about life-altering experiences!

    • KrakenSkulls says:

      What’s the link for drug hangover cures. It’s for uh, a friend. and lulz. I gotta see this shit.

  21. RollsRoyceRevenge says:

    In other news, Ginger Idiot Takes Off All Clothes in Own Hotel Room, Queen Not Amused.

    Forget Pancakes McCain, Julia. You might have a shot at ol’ Borrowed Genes, if his taste in private entertainment is anything to go by. A couple of games of Strip Billiards and Kate Middleton’s yer in-law.

    Crooked pinky indeed.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      Do you think the Queen will put him in a major time out? Will this be a big scandal for the royals?

      • Catfish & Sweet Potatoes For Dessert says:

        It would be if not for Fergie’s entire existence.

        The army will scold him, his father will give him a stern glare and the British public will love him all the more.

        • Classier than his Hitler youth Halloween costume, I say.

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          So true.

          And he’s a young single hot dude. What’s the big deal, really? Fergie was married when that guy was sucking her toes.

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            The entire thing is ludicrous.

            Rich frat-boy asshole with halfway decent body goes to Vegas to do what all rich frat-boy assholes with halfway decent bodies do when they are in Vegas – party naked in a penthouse with girls with poor social media control.

            Big fucking whoop.

            That said – I so would.

            They should give him a medal for rebranding the Royals as borderline-fuckable after all that Prince Tampon bullshit.

        • Donkey of Perdition says:

          BS Last year Britain increased tuition to state schools by 2x-3x because the Exchequer was broke, people rioted. There is a substantial minority of Brits who dislike the monarchy, especially considering their very existence is supported by public monies. Reaction? So this is what are tax dollars are going to, glad to know I couldn’t go to school this year so Prince Henry could get drunk in Vegas and hump strippers.

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            I have no pony in this race, but how is the Royal Family supported by the UK taxpayer? I gather that they collect taxes on their holdings, but how is that different from any other private landholder? Also, isn’t much of the Queen’s wealth part and parcel of the national balance, the way that the parks department, federally held resources, infrastructure and art collections in the US are?

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            In other words, the President doesn’t own the Library of Congress or the White House, so how does the Queen “own” Buckingham Palace or the Tower of London? In legal terms, doesn’t she simply hold them for the UK public as represented by her successor?

          • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

            The Royals are supported by taxpayer funds to the tune of 40 million GBP a year:

            http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/8124022.stm

          • Donkey of Perdition says:

            I also think their vast property holdings, assets and income is not subject to tax.

          • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant (almost a transitive-property) says:

            Most Europeans seem okay with their royals so long as they don’t say or do anything substantive. Amusingly, the Swedes got very annoyed at their king a few years ago for making pretty uncontroversial environmentalist comments. They just didn’t want to hear him saying anything meaningful.

            Being a British royal would be a great job for Julia–be ornamental and don’t do anything too interesting–but she’d still screw it up immediately.

          • Queen Neferteeri says:

            She’d have to marry into it, and at this rate, she’s not even going to get a fat, sweaty, bald, flatulent old guy to marry her.

      • CDB says:

        I hope he doesn’t lose his job.

      • One Fat Melman says:

        He can come have a time out over at my place any day…just saying.

    • Ignoramus with Pelts says:

      Lolz, RRR!

    • Albie Quirky says:

      The chick he was humping is really cute. Julie Albertson wouldn’t be in the running.

  22. frequent liar miles says:

    I was trying to reply to Handbag’s perfectly pithy reference to a certain “eternal asshole” but couldn’t find it, so I will just say here that it has supplanted “relentlessly stupid” as my favorite brief description of A Donkey.

    • frequent liar miles says:

      Went back and found it — so my accolades should have been directed to you, ‘cakez. Not to diminish the genius of Handbag in her ability to turn a phrase. It is just so comforting and satisfying to reduce the phenomenon of A Donkey to its essential … something …

  23. EyeRoller says:

    @juliaallison
    How to fight with your significant other …well! My love guru ‪@AnnieLalla‬ explains on CBS: http://losangeles.cbslocal.com/2012/08/20/love-guru-annie-lalla-explains-the-art-of-fighting/

    I’m guessing since Donk has no more projects of her own to shamelessly plug, she’s hocking Miss Hawaiian Tropic meets American Nixed Top Model hybrid penny stock contests (A penny stock is ONE PENNY MORE than the current net worth of her career stock), and hitching her rusty wagon to other people’s exposure, like “Love” interviews with Annie whose advice she didn’t take when she was actually on a show with her. Silly.

    Editors Note: I don’t dislike Annie Falalafel, but in that video she looks like an electrified parakeet who got dressed in a South Miami Beach Wet Seal store after having an unsuccessful Brazilian blowout by a botched Lasik recipient.

    • Queen Neferteeri says:

      So, Annie’s appearance winced you?

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Wow, what a groundbreaking new model for managing couples conflict that has certainly not been covered in the works of John Gottman, Pepper Schwartz, Harville Hendrix, or any of those other charlatans who go around flaunting their MDs and Ph. Ds and such! Thank heaven an uncredentialed “cartographer of love” was able to find the secret methods that were lurking right there in the writings of actually qualified relationship researchers!

      • Handbag Stuffed With Hair says:

        ROSENCRANTZ: I don’t believe in it, anyway.

        GUILDENSTERN: What?

        R: England.

        G: Just a conspiracy of cartographers, then?

        • Julia's Authentic Pelts says:

          love that movie!!! by the way, i saw Stoppard’s “Arcadia” last year on bway…omg that is a good play too. they both kind of play with time, past and present, etc.

        • EyeRoller says:

          Funny. A good friend and I were in a very unglamorous community theater rendition of that play years ago, and 90% of our communication consisted of R&G quotes for at least a year afterwards. I loved the movie too. Thanks for that memory.

        • Chairman Maw says:

          It’s available to stream on Netflix. I just say.

      • EyeRoller says:

        I’ll give a microscopic shred of credit to OooLala in that she essentially verbalized the same thing to Donk in that M.A. episode as the Steven Grossman quote above, which is– Try to get past the “they’re mean to me” schtick and ask yourself, Donk, brutally and honestly, if certain things (this blog says) that you might perceive as cruel and rude, might just be true.

  24. Jordache and the Pelts says:

    OT (and forgive me if it’s been discussed already):

    I’ve caught Emily Morse on the teevees a few times (and I don’t watch that much television, dont’t have cable at home and have been out of the country much of the summer).
    It seems like she’s been able to give her Miss Advised run some legs and parlay the experience into becoming a bona fide “expert” talking head. Anyways, last night she was on Dr. Drew on HLN (I know, dubious distinction). In the few minutes I watched, Emily came off as polished, calm, articulate and savvy despite her shrill voice. I think the topic was establishing boundaries in relationships or something (I can’t handle narcissist Dr. Drew and he’s totes Republican and skirted around this week’s Rape/Personage issues the previous night). Anyways, way to school Julia

    • Dr. Drew sucks, as does Dr. Phil, but I’m happy to see that Emily is milking whatever she can out of MA. She’s a smart cookie.

      • Jordache and the Pelts says:

        I’ve always been convinced Dr. Phil is a closet perv. Cannot stand. Oprah been really irresponsible thrusting Oz, huckster grifter Ilyanla, and Nate Berkus (his fussy bland design sensibilities are a crime) on us. Dr. Oz promotes some wackadoodle, medically dubious stuff on his show.
        And why do they have to make a show out of his wife escorting offstage after each episode? “Doctors” Phil and Drew give me the creeps.

        • Chairman Maw says:

          “Dr.” Phil lost his license over an inappropriate relationship with a patient. That’s how he ended up working as a jury consultant and meeting Oprah. So, yeah, a pervert.

        • Oprah should have been a lot choosier with her “experts.”

          Didn’t know that about Dr. phil, but he looks like the type. Gross.

    • secret fail says:

      I saw Alton Busey on an episode of Lisa Ling’s Our America. He was not as creepy on OWN as he was on Miss Advised. Still highly creepy.

  25. Malformed Face says:

    So Donkey is up to something. After weeks of her Twitter numbers staying flat after she went from 26,000 followers to 111,000 plus followers in just 2 months (sometimes buying 6k in a night) she has just jumped from 111,000 to 117,000.

    Come on Donkey. The night after Miss Advised that last two episodes, she only picked up 1,000 followers per night. So now she expects us to believe she got 6,000 followers in a night?????

    I’m thinking Donkey got a whole lot of shitty Burning Man costumes for free and wants to continue to look like an influencer so she is buying fans fast and furious to get the free stuff.

    • SirClompsAlot says:

      Wow yes I just noticed yesterday that she seemed to be stuck at 111,000 for a while now she has 6,000 more in one day. I too call donkshit.

    • SirClompsAlot says:

      I don’t know why she bothers either. 26,000 is a respectable number. I’ve seen legitimate celeb verified twitter users that only have 10k.

      • Malformed Face says:

        She wants to have more than Randi Zuckerberg.

        • SirClompsAlot says:

          She’s gone up another 2,000+ in the last couple of hours.

          Sloowwww dowwwwn donks … you’re obvious!

          • Malformed Face says:

            Interestingly, there was someone on Twitter who was calling her out left and right on buying followers. They were CCing Intel, etc. I wonder if she stopped buying because she was under a microscope for a bit.

            And now that account is suspended:

            http://twitter.com/account/suspended

            PS DONKEY!

          • SirClompsAlot says:

            What is the Intel connection? I’ve seen that mentioned before, but as a noob I don’t know how she’s connected.

          • Albie Quirky says:

            She claimed she had a $100,000 consulting gig with them. This was clearly a lie, but they apparently did pay her a buck two ninety-eight to bray and twitch in some stupid web videos.

    • Cowboys & Brayliens says:

      According to the fake twitter followers app, @juliaallison has 65% fake followers and 31% inactive (probably fake) followers. That’s 96% of her followers that are, essentially, bogus.

      Or, she has a little under 5000 “real” followers.

      • Stinky Velour Couture says:

        thank you for your dedication.
        So. blessed.

        Not Random!

      • Blinking.SOS.at.the.Camera says:

        I ran the same app for my twitter account. I have far fewer followers but my stats are: 2% Fake, 7% Inactive, 91% Good.
        Someone remind me again what I’m supposed to be jealous of here?

        [img]http://i48.tinypic.com/1zp6tz4.png[/img]

        • LetItExplode says:

          how do you look this stuff up? i don’t want to give them my password.

          • Blinking.S.O.S.at.the.Camera says:

            I log in via my own twitter account.

          • LetItExplode says:

            I tried that but it says I’m granting them permission to change my profile and tweet from my account. Doesn’t that sound a little fishy to you? Or am I reading it wrong?

    • Stinky Velour Couture says:

      does anyone know how much these fake followers cost?
      genuinely curious

    • Barking Mad, Intel Advisor says:

      She recently tweeted that Snooki makes $7500 per tweet. I guess that’s her new goal.

      Give it up, Donkey. Nobody knows or cares who you are. Except us, and a few @stupidwomen.

      • Princess WideStance says:

        Fuck me. She really does want this to be her career!

        Tweet-shilling, the occasional TV appearance, conferences, parties, constant travel. All with Johnny Drama in tow.

        That kind of life would really make her content. Problem is, eventually you’ve got to DO something in order to stay on the radar of even the stupidest people. How will she continue to get the attention she craves?

        • A Donkey is an Ass says:

          Sex tape. With all of her braying about BJs and sexy-sex costume dress-up party fun times, yeah! I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised for a soft-core sex tape to be “hacked and leaked.”

          Desperate Donkey is desperate.

          • Albie Quirky says:

            That might be the end of the parental gravy train.

            Which would just send Julie down the Octomom path of desperation.

          • miss assvice says:

            I thought for sure there was going to be a sex tape with her and redacted at one point. It would be so like her to “leak” something like that. Thankfully the world was spared for now.

          • A Donkey is an Ass says:

            I just think that Donkey had her modicum of success disappear once before and it sent her into a tailspin. If she feels her nano-success from Miss Assvice (see what I did there?) start to fade, she’s going to do whatever she feels is necessary to prevent that from happening again. That means anything up to and including a boring ass sex tape. It won’t be anything too graphic; which will mean she was behind it. She’ll try to play it off as, “I’m a super-duper sexual person in the greatest love-affair of all. It was romantic and my haters hacked my computer. I’m a victim. Poor meeeeeeee!”

          • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

            donkey’s sex tape already came out, you guys. check out how she deep throats that cupcake.
            http://vimeo.com/1440334
            (yes, totally SFW).

        • EyeRoller says:

          There was some talk here in another thread (in this post) about that 2009 Jay Cutler non-incident, just a blip on the Donk-dar, so when I went to research that, I found an article (link below, I’m sure some here have seen it), where Donk gives the truest evaluation of herself I’ve heard fall out of her maw, ever, to date:

          “‘Then again, I take photos of myself for a living – and not even particularly good ones – so who am I to talk?’”
          –julia allison

          http://deadspin.com/5226235/jay-cutlers-late-night-activities-prompt-furious-debate

          You’re right Princess, she would do nothing for a living if she could, and be totally happy, but she’s not even excellent at doing nothing. She’s given the whole “jackass of all trades, master of none” a try as well over the years (sexy techie, relationship expert, columnist, reality star) and fallen flat on her pillow face in every direction. Now what???

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

            “What’s the plan NOW, Pillow Face?”
            ~Mom$er, Episode I, Season Only

      • LetItExplode says:

        …But companies will obviously check to see if someone has nothing but fake followers before they pay users to advertise… Right?

        • Malformed Face says:

          I think we’ll see that they are savvy to that in the next 2 to 3 years… right now, not so much. I think they might look more closely had she not been on Miss Advised but might chalk her jump up to that.

          • Sake Bombardier says:

            I agree, it’s going to take some time before the mainstream wises up.

            Here in Nowheresville, NC, the innarwebs are on about a five-year delay. I’m toying with the idea of buying some followers to confound a couple of self-appointed social-media evangelists in my family. Hee.

          • Sake Bombardier says:

            “Can you believe you can just tell this music gee-gaw Pandora what you want to hear and it just keeps playing music you like! HOO WEE!”

          • SirClompsAlot says:

            Okay that Pandora thing just made me straight-up laugh.

        • mcakez: Strange Puss = Sexually Delicious! says:

          I will say this: per that ‘get paid to tweet’ page she is part of, her rates have doubled since the first #cheesyskillet, pre-Miss Advertised airing. I am going to guess that it was the Donkey who upped the rate, based on her 90k new ‘followers’ and her blip of fame. That being said, she hasn’t ad-tweeted in a while, so I guess no one is paying her shill-fee.

          Poor Donkey. It must suck so bad to suck so much at sucking.

    • Jelly Roll says:

      I thought that when Taylor started this whole Kennedy stalking bit. Now she’s dating one of them – and it feels a little JABA to me the way she’s wearing all these red/white/blue ensembles and buying a house in HPort already…

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      I heard about this during my morning commute and thought it all seemed familiar.

    • A colossus of scheme juices and failure says:

      Taylor thinks she can buy her way into the Kennedy family. What a stupid little fuck she is.

      When Madonna was dating JFK Jr, Jackie O refused to meet her or allow her into the vaunted 5th Ave apartment.

      If it didn’t work for Madonna, I doubt it is going to work for little Taylor.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        OMG I have a true story from my days working in fundraising that will boggle your mind.

        I was working for an institution that included, among its funders, David “Koch Brothers” Koch. At a big fancy cocktail party for major donors, a number of older rich ladies were eager to corner Koch and hear all the scoop about Jackie O’s apartment, which he had rather famously just boughten.

        Hand to Greg, he said the following, “Oh, it’s a nice place, but it needed a lot of work. You know how it is when older people have lived somewhere for a long time, it kind of gets this funny dusty smell.”

        Dudebro is so definitely on the spectrum.

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      What moron wants to be a Kennedy these days? All the halfway decent ones are dead.

      • stalker is the new very meandering home intruder says:

        and the rest are hounding each other into early graves.

  26. Julia's Authentic Pelts says:

    Wow Julie is a fucking bore lately. Seriously, I don’t think I’ve ever been this bored by her, and I’ve been following this shitshow since 2007. Yep, that’s how much of a loser catlady I am. I miss the crazy!

    • A Donkey is an Ass says:

      Just the calm before the storm, my friend. The calm before the storm.

      Between the Burning Man shit/sand storm, the break-up with Goat Soap and the tens of fan from Bravo moving on, shit is going to get crazy soon.

    • Psychotic Today says:

      We all felt like this last summer. Then Burning Man happened. The epic levels of cray proved that there is a Greg. Remember when she pretty much attacked Redacted at a post Burning Man meet up? The cray is coming. Make some popcorn, pour yourself a nice beer and pull our some extra comfy blankets. The circus is coming to town.

    • Malformed Face says:

      Rest up for Pancakes wedding in June of ’13!!!!!!!

      EPIC CRAY!

    • Albie Quirky says:

      The Goat Soap bustup should be interesting.

  27. Can't Dance; Too Fat to Fly says:
  28. EyeRoller says:

    On this day, August 22nd, I’d like to thank all of you who (unlike this here ho) were here on this night ONE YEAR AGO, when RBD hosted special guest Donk-defender “Kelleigh C.”(http://rebloggingdonk.com/2011/08/22/donk-goes-to-tools-conference-believes-magic-will-now-happen/), a guest who limped off this site with several fresh new assholes, torn by many of you beautiful “Life Catsters” out there. I recognize many of you now from reading some of those post comments. How far a Donkey hasn’t come. For me, she doesn’t get more boring as the future progresses, she just gets more dreadful the more I look back…

    • EyeRoller says:

      Let’s all just pretend like I have the date right and it’s August 22nd, can we? I’m mentally way more than a day behind the rest of the world anyway.

    • Handbag Stuffed With Hair says:

      The moment I realized she actually had tickets and was going to Burning Man, I jumped out of my chair and danced around with pure moronic joy. It signaled the convergence of the twain in such a novel and perfect way, I felt like Jesus arranged it just for ME. It turns out it was a cosmic gift for ALL OF US.

    • CDB says:

      Those were interesting days, Kelleigh/Lasagna on a rampage, the earthquake and the lead-up to Burning Man…. Thanks for the memories.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      So magical. The basement’s introduction to Lewish, Lasagna’s frenetic insistence that Julie wasn’t getting fired (which, I suppose, didn’t actually happen for a few more weeks)….

      And of course her public display of thundercuntitude over the East Coast earthquake.

      Good times.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        I actually think now that those commenters were Donkey herself, trying to “dumb it down” a bit. The yoga parlance was a giveaway.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          I thought the IP address was Long Island, though?

          • CDB says:

            she may have figured out how to use hotspot shield by then

          • Albie Quirky says:

            I would believe that if she weren’t so stupid.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            They were coming from Long Island, it’s true.

            When I go back and read her comments, they are so hilariously retarded. Going on about how the show’s producers LOVED Donkey and she was going to be the star of the show because she was so much more interesting than the other two. If, by interesting, she meant insane.

        • EyeRoller says:

          Yes, even being new, I thought the same thing (Kelleigh C.= Donk!) while reading it last night.

    • Donkarena says:

      EyeRoller, thank you so much for this delicious link — as a newbie, I have missed so much…I will now enjoy this with my morning coffee.

  29. mcakez: Strange Puss = Sexually Delicious! says:

    dudebrah just came to the RBD mainpage so he could go into chat (which he sometimes does, though he doesn’t generally read the board and has never commented), and he clicked on the TMI video below this post.

    It has taken him 20 minutes to watch it, because he keeps pausing it to bitch about how horrible Julia is, and then rewind because he had paused and forgotten the train of thought. He just told me, “I hate her at least twice as much as I did from watching you watch Miss Advertised, probably more. She is horrible.”

    He also said, “It’s not just that she is undateable, it’s that she represents so many horrible things. She is a stand-in for so many horrible people. I hate her on behalf of many horrible people.”

    Not the most articulate argument ever, but hilarious how he (generally a very thoughtful and articulate person) is reduced to a simmering spigot of malformed anger and disgust after just five minutes of watching her preen for the camera.

    He also said that Mary is ‘spot on’ most of the clip, and especially likable compared to Jules. He also took a screen cap of Meg and Mary making ‘Bitch, plz’ faces while Juera brays.

  30. CDB says:

    Julia Price ‏@JuliaPriceMusic
    You know your roommate is really in love when you see her more on twitter than in real life. @JuliaAllison #devinkidnappedjuliaandlilly

    • Malformed Face says:

      I can’t think of a worse mistake than spending 24/7 in the beginning and showing you obviously have no life or friends at all.

    • ScoobyDon't says:

      So Donkey finally figured out how to send you money by PayPal, right TJ?
      It’s a bitch being a friend for hire.

  31. The Tortuous and the Hair says:

    I wonder if Steven gave a Donkey grief over missing her morning show – the one Emily and Amy showed up to, sans a Donkey. Or if Bravo gave Steven grief. I’m curious about the consequences of that little blunder.

    • Malformed Face says:

      He actually has major clients in the reality world that I’m sure bring him big commissions, he doesn’t have time to babysit a Donkey.

      • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

        Yeah, you’re right, but I thought because of his “it’s not mean if it’s true” thing, he might have called her irresponsible or unprofessional or something. It made me wonder if anyone ever said anything to her about her no-show, or whether there is anyone at all in her life who tries to hold her accountable for her actions.

  32. Don Quixote says:

    Sry if this has been posted, but this recent tweet super pisses me off:

    “I always assume other people’s parents are more reasonable/easygoing/normal/rational than mine.”

    Is she fucking serious?! Is this a joke? I don’t get it. Like seriously, you’re 31-years-old and you’re whining about your parents on twitter? She is such a horrible daughter, her parents should disown her.

    • Malformed Face says:

      She went from Jack McCain to Goat Soap, I’m sure they were none too impressed and said so. Now she is unemployed and off to Burning Man? Yeah, shocking that they had something to say about this.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      That’s probably true of Goat Soap’s parents, who aren’t tepid messes like Pettifogger and Mama Bird. (Or, for that matter, like Walnuts! and Pillderella.)

    • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

      [img]http://hmcurrentevents.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/SNLEAN792200_167P_lg.jpg[/img]

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      I still think they wouldn’t let them sleep in the same bed and this was a big, prolonged Donkey-tantrum.

    • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

      so on that little soiree writeup, donks is described as a “former relationship columnist”, and identified as “Julia Allison Baugher.” what was that about leaving her last name off wikipedia to protect her family’s privacy? damn, pettifogger needs some new headshots. i hear his daughter knows all about grifting some free fauxtoshoots.

      • Don Quixote says:

        I love her comment about being a “bold face name at a party” for the first time, but being listed after all those significant people just makes her look like a tool bag. Being a reality TV star is nothing to be proud of girl.

        • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

          How hard is it to get press attending a party your parents throw for a charity in their back yard?

          “Mr. and Mrs. Gottbucks hosted a cocktail party last Saturday. In attendance were Mr. & Mrs. Van Dam, the Rockefellers, Miss Abigail Carnegie, Mayor Floodle, the Duchess of Sprok, Hollywood starlet Melody Moor and the Gottbucks’ creepy son who lives under the dining room table.”

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      I read that as D0nkey bitching about Goat Soap’s parents …

      • Chairman Maw says:

        Ditto. It would be great if they asked they their little Soapy how he plans to make rent this month if he spends a week in the desert riding a Donkey.

    • Grammarian says:

      My parents are perfect, in a perfect relationship, in which they are still married, whilst being perfect

      Wait, what happened, they’re not?

  33. A Donkey is an Ass says:

    “@JuliaAllison Important – does anyone know a doctor in LA who treats men who is awake right now? It’s a minor emergency. ”

    Bitch is fucking stupid. Like, Todd Akin stupid.

    • Don Quixote says:

      HAHA. Apparently donks has never heard of the emergency room.

      • Mooch says:

        Or 911…

      • Don Quixote says:

        Shocking, you think typing “emergency” in her tweet might have tipped her off.

      • A Donkey is an Ass says:

        And why specify “who treats men”? Is she assuming @stupid girls would suggest an OB/GYN or a vet?

        • Malformed Face says:

          “Who treats men” was to let everyone know SHE IS WITH HER BOYFRIEND. SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND. EVEN THOUGH SHE HAS A PENIS, SHE CAN STILL GET A BOYFRIEND (FLASHES GANG SIGNS).

          • A Donkey is an Ass says:

            Good point. I momentarily forgot that everything is dripping with scheme juices.

            Will she then twat about the Dr. in exchange for services rendered?

          • mule on rouge says:

            Or she is trying to make him jealous…

        • Helena (Sexy Baconface) says:

          Pretty fucking sure ALL doctors, INCLUDING OB/GYN who to my knowledge are the only kind of doctors who don’t “treat men” during their regular practice, treat penis-havers in cases of emergency. (Although “a minor emergency” could easily translate as “bullshit” in this particular case.) It’s called the Hippocratic Oath, Donkey, you hypocritic oaf.

    • Malformed Face says:

      This sentence is barely english.

      Is Goat Soap the ultimate grifter? Is he trying to get out of Paris, I mean Burning Man?

      • Malformed Face says:

        During an emergency, always best to crowd source from strangers on how to deal with A MEDICAL EMERGENCY.

        She is such a stupid bitch.

    • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

      so, lilly bit off his johnson during sexytimes?
      or her wiener finally emerged?

    • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

      [img]http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lnsuubJCbs1qari0vo1_500.jpg[/img]

    • jane says:

      “A doctor who treats men”??

    • mule on rouge says:

      Why specify a doctor who treats men? Is her dick stuck in a drainpipe? Even Donks isn’t so delusional that she thinks any one on earth is monitoring her twitstream 24/7. When she crowdsources, she never really wants an answer. She’s ALWAYS got an ulterior motive.

    • Helena (Sexy Baconface) says:

      BWAHAHAHA! This is pure gold. All this time I thought that my grandfather was an oncologist, but now, thanks to Donkence Nightinbray, I know that was just a doctor who treated men.

    • Whiny Bitch Spoiled says:

      I’M WITH A BOY AND ITS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHICH MEANS WE WERE HAVING THEXY THEX BECAUSE HE THINKS I’M HOT!

      Everything is such obvious posturing with this loony toon.

      If it’s that bad, go to the fucking ER. If not, then go to an urgent care clinic in the AM. And fuck off.

    • ScoobyDon't says:

      Erectile Dysfunction 911. Please state the cause of your flaccidity.
      Tears and braying sir?
      Please remove yourself immediately from the Pink Dungeon and get yourself as far away from any tulle, pelts or anything of the donkey persuasion as you can.
      Depending on the length of your exposure you should regain rigidity in 6 to 12 months.
      However you can expect flareups for the next 10 to 50 years as you can never ever ever escape the Burro Loco.
      Have an ineffable night.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      If she meant a urologist, I vote FORESKIN DISASTER DUE TO CHICLET TEEFS

      • 11th Wang says:

        You just made me hurt all over.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        Specialty w/in a specialty is what I meant (urology oncologist).

        On a side note: Anyone notice that D0nk was braying about Lance Armstrong getting stripped of his titles? HER BOYFRIEND rode a bike once, maybe he has omg testicular cancer too?! (how her brain works when it comes to reflected glory &/or making any ‘news’ about her).

      • EyeRoller says:

        It’s called: Veneerius Dick Tearius

  34. Post-Vibrator Euphoric Flush says:

    RE: “Men Doctors” at 11 pm – it’s called URGENT CARE, you twat.

    P.S. Julia Allison Baugher is a fucking useless tool and even her parents know it.

  35. hee haw says:

    Goat soup took some Viagra and is now past the 4 hour boner mark. How else could/would be able to perform with donkarella? Donkey – it’s called priapism and he needs medical attention.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      D0nkey probably scored fake ED drugs when she was walking thru storefronts.

  36. SirClompsAlot says:

    Shit, she is a mental case! Her tweet now says she specified doctors for men because she didn’t want a rumor to go around that she was pregnant!

    What human being tweets about a pregnancy emergency? WHO WOULD EVER READ A “HELP, I NEED A DOCTOR” TWEET AS A PREGNANCY SCARE? SHE IS INSANE!

    I can’t even with this Donkey.

    • Donkarena says:

      I guess she was afraid of racing her BOYFRIEND to the nearest Urgent Care facility, only to be told “Sorry — all the doctors are sleeping”

    • Tingolayo says:

      Yeah, because everyone knows when their doctors are AWAKE. I know when mine holds office hours, but I don’t really keep track of when she’s AWAKE. But I’m pretty sure there are some awake people at the emergency rooms of the 2 local hospitals.

      It’s kinda fun being a noob– little surprises at every turn. You’ll only experience your first Julia Retroactive False Non-Pregnancy Non-Scare Alert once.

    • Don Quixote says:

      She clearly wants people to speculate that she is pregnant by saying that. Trying to start your own pregnancy rumor is just pathetic and redonkulous.

      • Malformed Face says:

        Seriously, that is the LAST thing I thought. WTF?????

        • Jelly Roll says:

          Agreed – although now it makes me think Goat Soap might want to check the condoms for pinholes. (Or to see if her BC case is actually chock full of tic tacs!)

          • Malformed Face says:

            To get what child support? He would have to sell his Ikea pleather sofas!

            Julie is desperate for attention. I don’t know why but of all the disgusting things she’s done – the fact that she would tweet people she does not even know while someone is having a medical emergency is just making me see her for the unhinged sociopath she really is.

            HOW DARE YOU TAKE ATTENTION AWAY FROM ME??????? I’LL TWEET EVERYONE SO THEY KNOW IT’S ALL ABOUT MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME!

            Goat Soap… this is your girlfriend. You should remedy that situation. Do you want the mother of your child Tweeting for help when your child is choking? Figure your shit out.

        • Prof. F Camping Prof. F Camping says:

          @therosecityqueen: @JuliaAllison why do you think people would speculate that you are pregnant? Such an odd response.

          WORRISOME EVEN!

          • Jelly Roll says:

            on the other hand, she has to tweet SOMETHING – otherwise those 125,000+ followers might not seem believable!

          • SirClompsAlot says:

            OMG she DOES have 125k now! WHO IS SHE FOOLING WITH THESE BOUGHT FOLLOWERS??????

    • CaptainGary says:

      Why in Greg’s name would there even BE a pregnancy emergency for someone who isn’t you know, LIKE NINE MONTHS PREGNANT AND GIVING BIRTH!?!?

      Oh, because anyone who understands anything about anything related to how the world works wouldn’t think that, so Donks just had to make sure her dozen of live fans wouldn’t think that too. Makes sense now.

      • CaptainGary says:

        ETA that I know there can be pregnancy emergencies before nine months – it’s just I’d imagine that most happen when women are visibly pregnant, which Donks isn’t…OR IS SHE?

      • Malformed Face says:

        Two people responded. Both to laugh at her. Neither cared about her LOLemergency.

        No one cares, Julie.

  37. Whiny Bitch Spoiled says:
    • LEFOOLIEH says:

      That last bit sounds like she wrote it herself/told the writer what to put down verbatim. So off and weird.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Well, of course they used her real name, because the only reason she was in the article was because she was Mama Bird and Pettifogger’s daughter. If she was really just herself they wouldn’t have boldfaced her. “RANDOM LOSER FROM LOW-RATED REALITY SHOW ATTENDS PARTY” isn’t a story.

    • EyeRoller says:

      I think she’s obviously getting hellfire non-stop about calling herself a relationship EXPERT, so she insisted they refer to her as a relationship COLUMNIST in that article, which is still a hard reach, but it’s way more accurate than being an expert of any sort.

    • Stinky Velour Couture says:

      Dadser looks really schlumpy in that ill-fitting suit.

    • EyeRoller says:

      Listen, I’m not saying hospice charity isn’t a valuable thing, I’m just saying that some families of donkeys I know would conveniently pitch a tent to justify a tax exemption/write off for charity while still managing to use the setup for a wedding and also getting their house decorated for free from the bride’s mother. Just speculation, it seems very convenient that the hospice event made for a nice little favorable PR nugget for the lovely Baughers.

      • Malformed Face says:

        Oh the whole thing is a grifter’s paradise! Using the free set up, probably even the flowers, from the wedding for the charity event. Now we know we’re she gets her scamming gene from.

        • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

          It seems that Ma and Pa Kettle have supported the hospice center for quite a while. Not going to blame them for taking advantage of a tent that’s already set up. Julia popping up in boldface is the risible part.

          In other news, I recently gave a tea party for all of my dolls. Among the guests were Tessie Tressie, Disney Version Winnie the Pooh, Headless Scary Bitch, Evil Clown, Rubber Tarantula, Thing that is Supposed to be a Cat but looks more like a Duck and Julia Allison Baugher, also mostly made of plastic.

  38. CountMeInDaisy says:

    It’s not mean if it’s true, huh? Guess that leaves you no room to bitch, whine, and bray about this blog anymore, does it Donkerella? Feel free to go sob into your massive pile of tulle, clutching one of your many tiaras, wondering why nobody likes you. Couldn’t possibly be because you’re a complete stalker maniac, could it? Hmmm. One does wonder.

  39. Jelly Roll says:

    L.A.S ‏@SartoriallyInc
    RT if you’re a designer letting Julia Allison into your fashion show.
    Collapse Reply Retweet Favorite

    that was tweeted on Aug 12 – so far, not one retweet ;)

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