Hmmmmmm

So we got a tip tonight that Donk’s face is swollen because she’s puking again. Not sure if this is knowledge or speculation. For all we know it could be JA herself behind the message for whatever scheme-juicy reason that would make only sense to a donkey, which means it could also be bullshit. But why is she linking to an old post about bulimia again, and going on about weight and body image issues she’s delving into with her “therapist?”

And it would certainly explain the mystery that is her bloated face.

If so …

Dear Donkey:

If your bulimia is back, get offline, you ridiculous fool, and get into an extensive treatment program. You are not contemptible because of your body, for God’s sake. You have a pretty smoking figure; it’s your behavior that’s gross. Jesus, lady, get some help.

Sincerely,

Angry, sort of sad adults, shitheads and Type-A haters

 

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139 Responses to Hmmmmmm

  1. Imminent Meltdown says:

    The White Shoes! Why??!?!! How Midwest can you get?

    • Worrisome Pelts says:

      Ah, yes, hideous fashion choices *are* confined to one area of the country.

      • Imminent Meltdown says:

        Ok, yeah. No Offence But …
        Socks with sandles on the Left Coast or Madison WI?
        Big hair with too much daytime make-up; sound like South to you?
        Ironic hair and t-shirt slogans and … Hipster … Brooklyn or Baltimore?
        Freshwater Pearls and matching shoes seems a little Second City, trying too hard to me. It only works for comedy.

        • Worrisome Pelts on a Bloat-Faced Donkey says:

          I’m not from the Midwest or any of the places you mentioned, I’m just amused that Lefties pretend that Othering and stereotyping are disgusting behaviors that only a Neanderthals would engage in…until they want to mock the Flyover. Carry on.

        • Actually, Chicago as a whole is more hipster than anything. When I think of an outfit like that I think of Easter in Houston in the 80s.

          Have you ever BEEN to Chicago? Or spent time there beyond Navy Pier (which gives as much of an accurate picture of Chicago as going to Times Square gives you of NYC)?

        • K_Swizz says:

          As someone who currently lives in Madison, I’ve never seen anyone wear socks with sandals. Or enormous plastic heels.

          Walk down State Street any day and you’re more likely to find everyone wearing jeans and Converse.

        • notes from the academe says:

          Julia isn’t even from Chicago. The time she’s actually spent in Chicago is negligible, and when she did “live” there for a year she lived in the Chicago equivalent of Times Square. Impugning someone from Wilmette for having “Second City” fashion sense is like pointing to people who live fairly deep in New Jersey and calling them New Yorkers. For that matter, Julia’s taste clearly isn’t geographically linked to anything. It’s her own, I don’t know, identity-building program that is completely unhinged from how people actually are.

      • Jack the Bulldog says:

        I’m often amazed that I can dress myself in the morning, coming from Chicago and all.

        • Imminent Meltdown says:

          Break the Rules, Bulldog!
          I’m on your side.

        • Princess WideStance says:

          I’m in Chicago right now and must admit that I was surprised by how hip everyone seems to be. It’s the tourists who have no fashion sense. The legions of young people who live here look great.

        • Greg'sWife (literally) aka DirtyLakeMichigan says:

          Heh… this is timely. I just had the epiphany yesterday that ‘jorts’ are a fashion faux-pas! Apparently has been for a few years – even a few websites dedicated to it with the flavor of ‘people of WalMart’. I looked at my catman wearing his ‘jorts’, workboots, and a dirty tee and told him he was a fashion laugh-fest. He gave himself a once-over, put on a baseball cap and hopped on his ride-on mower saying, “yee-hawww”. We’re from NJ.

    • Oh god says:

      I’ve lived my whole life in the Midwest, and I have never seen white shoes like that. If my friend showed up to any sort of gathering like that, I’d make her go home and change. Of all of the fashion disasters that come out of the Midwest, I’d be hard-pressed to say that white shoes are the greatest or most unique of our sins. If Julia were wearing a Packers jersey to a church in this photo, I would be inclined to agree with you.

      • 24/7 donkey show says:

        A Packers jersey would be a vast improvement over her Easter Whore getup.

        • Queen Neferteeri says:

          She’d manage to find (or alter) one into a poofy short skirt hiked up just below her cutlet-enhanced bewbs.

    • What Would Kate Middleton Do? (Stripper Shoes) says:

      Oh, hello! I believe I’ve been rung?

  2. Grammarian says:

    how many pairs of spanxx? two? three?

  3. Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

    I think it’s really wise to question this tip when:

    1) What a coincidence she just name checked her bulimia on her Twitter, now this?
    2) Donkey has no friends in NYC, no one would put her up so she’s staying in a hotel – we know how nuts she is when she’s alone
    3) She cannot be trusted

    • Cut. Don't use that. says:

      We also know how she HATES paying for hotels. Maybe she’s doing some engagements for Bravo so they comped it? Because otherwise Julia NEVER gets a hotel. She totally gets an NPD pussyboner over people letting her stay in their home. “They made up a special guest room for MEEEEE and they changed their plans for MEEEEEE and they cleaned their bathroom just for MEEEEE” and so on.

      • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

        There’s definitely some sort of Bravo thing happening that they are paying for her to stay at the Standard. WWHL no doubt, and I will bet Monday night.

        Of course, she’s a high-maintenance piece of shit demanding they remove the minibar because she can’t control herself when it comes to “chocolate”. Whatever, you stupid fucking delusional princess. Do you know, that’s kind of a pain in the ass for hotel staff? Do you care? No.

        Sounds like Bravo told her, we’re putting you up but you pay for things like the minibar.

        • Get a Therapist says:

          Cathy Comic. Ack, chocolate. She is really low and empty. So empty that she gets high off of strangers on Twitter stroking her ego.

        • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

          She was supposed to be on WWHL on the 23rd but maybe with the show failing so miserably they moved it up.

        • LEFOOLIEH says:

          “@SFShag – AH HAHAHHAHAHHAHAH (oh god, can’t breathe) AHAHHAHAHA” – JA, 1:12AM EST

          “@sallygirl823 – HELL YEAH! QUALITY FOREVER! I am no longer making sense. I really need chocolate.” – JA, 1:15AM EST

          “I emailed my dad a NYT piece on Chicago & he replied: “Sounds like a nice city. You should visit some time. Let us know what you think.” LOL” – JA, 1:19AM EST (prepping for the inevitable move back to Chicago?)

          “In case you didn’t get that … my Dad was born & raised in Chicago. As was I. Parental sarcasm is always so delightful. ;-)” – JA, 1:20AM EST “I wish I had a British accent so everything I said would sound smart. Instead I was born in Chicago.”

          “Would it be so wrong to call the front desk & politely ask them to bring BACK the minibar chocolate? (Um, definitive sign it’s time for bed)” – JA, 4:06AM EST

          Her tweets come into angry sad jelliz h8r chat as she posts them (which means we get the pleasure of seeing her editing process and tweets that she deletes never quite disappear forever) and while reading the scroll I honestly couldn’t bear to go any further back and read more — this alone is sad as hell.

          She is no longer too good for the “little people” (johnny no-mates) all of a sudden because they’ve become integral to both her life and the trajectory/storyline she’s working so hard to push. Of course, a lazy donkey is a lazy donkey and such responses will be short-lived as they only serve to show she’s engaging with “fans” (yikes) of the show. All the same, it’s quite a change from the JA of ’06/’07. She was too good for those she pretty much depends on now. I’m not sure I doubt the bulimia story altogether, but it would come as NO surprise if she were taking that angle to explain her face/body and force a martyr/sympathy thing. Also, who called it that she’d be posting her therapy details on twitter and/or online, because there it is right there. Doin’ it rong.

          • Queen Neferteeri says:

            All the same, it’s quite a change from the JA of ’06/’07. She was too good for those she pretty much depends on now.

            The ones she mocked as “fat” and having poor taste in fashion. For real.

      • melting marionette says:

        Rates for The Standard range from $205 to $1200 per night. Bravo probably have a negotiated corporate rate; otherwise, she isn’t staying there on her own dime.

  4. cupcake cray cray says:

    I predict julia will be de-friending kirsten tout de suite, after her most recent comment on facebook (and I think brit morin’s next diy will likely be a voodoo doll made of used tampons):

    Kirsten Osolind Doubtful, Julia. I empathize with the cyberbullying you’ve encountered, but EACH OF US encounters our own life hardships. Becoming a semi-scripted reality-show celebrity doesn’t change things – indeed, it introduces far more long-lasting psychological issues (a sense of entitlement, detachment, self-absorption, emotional rollercoaster lifestyles, and “traumatized dramatization”). If half of the labor involved with producing and acting in reality shows was siphoned off into propelling worthwhile philanthropic initiatives the world would be a far better place. Reality shows parody real life; they marginalize and undermine the integrity and sanctity of reality. I support your personal goals and defend your right to pursue fame. What’s your legacy? How will you leave the world a better place? Please don’t tell me it’s via a blog inspiring women to make necklaces out of loofas or telling women how to find a rich/handsome husband rather than create their own remarkable life. I’m just sayin…..

    • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

      OH, SNAP!!! I was just coming here to post this – an for clarification – the “How will you leave the world a better place? Please don’t tell me it’s via a blog inspiring women to make necklaces out of loofas…” is a direct dig at Brit Morin who featured that on her blog the other day.

      LOfuckingL

    • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

      So these two must have had a recent falling out – because on June 27 Donkey posted herself, on Facebook, in her blow job dress that she wore on the show with moving-box-hauler-racist Justin.

      Kirsten, who does something with marketing, posting this:

      Kirsten Osolind Idea: Add a “who was she wearing” photo montage to the Elle.com column and Bravo page. Like Chrissy Russo (San Diego’s weather girl) or Kelly Ripa (Live with Kelly). Just a thought.
      27 June at 09:57 · Like · 1

      Julia Allison Kelly does this? Link? Love that idea!
      27 June at 11:14 · Like

      Kirsten Osolind Yep – here you go! http://www.dadt.com/live/fashion-finder.html

      Kelly’s Fashion Finder
      http://www.dadt.com
      Kelly’s Fashion Finder
      27 June at 12:07 · Like

      Kirsten Osolind Keep thinking about ways that you can develop and license your brand, kiddo. Just like Bethenny.
      27 June at 12:08 · Like · 1

      So two weeks ago she was rooting for Donkey to be the next Bethenny and NOW SHE’S PUTTING SHAME SHACKLES ON HER!!!!

      • Joardache & the Pelts says:

        I love how Julia both implies that she is somehow an associate of “Kelly” and can’t be bothered to look up the link herself. Typidonks.

    • JuLIAR Allison (will never the learn button) says:

      Oh Kirsten, you wonderful woman, you. Why don’t more of donkey’s friends stand up to her like this? Huzzah!

      • Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

        Well, her Facebook profile makes her sound a little bit loony herself: http://www.facebook.com/kirsten.osolind

        “I believe humanity is in a long-term decline and would be greatly served by the challenge of a predatory species to cull the herd.”

        “As an adult, I’ve weighed as much as 155 and as little as 100.” [WHY IS THIS NECESSARY?]

        …and a whole lot of self-promoting marketing banter that makes her sound like she’d be a nightmare to work with (“In 2009, Osolind was recognized as one of the nation’s 100 Leading Female Internet Heroes by The Next Women Magazine” — whatttt?) I wonder if her anti-reality-show talk means she’s surreptitiously gunning for a spot on Miss Advised as some kind of contrarian.

        • JFA says:

          She’s a bit too proud of herself for using big words. Most of the shit she wrote about reality tv makes no sense…she tries hard though. However, good ass whoopin nontheless. Definitely looney tunes though.

        • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

          “I believe humanity is in a long-term decline and would be greatly served by the challenge of a predatory species to cull the herd.”

          Holy shit- I can only imagine that she first, considers herself exempt from such sci-fi genocide, and second, what a dumb bitch, whatever she said about A Donkey.

          You really have to wonder when fucking idiots start throwing out genocidal ideas- where do they get this shit from? Stupid people, I mean. It’s profoundly nasty and uncute.

          • stalker is the new fat says:

            It’s very matt beauchampian.

          • Donkeycam now! (MSc) says:

            Yes, it sounds like she wants Hitler to come back and win the war this time.

            What a pathetic tool!

            My canklehausen is through the roof!

    • A Donkey is an Ass says:

      Oh, shit! I just peed a little.

    • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

      ROUND TWO, PEOPLE! ROUND TWO!

      Julia Allison Kirsten, the show isn’t semi-scripted. ;-) And it was deeply powerful for me to go through it. I came out a changed person. It’s not for you to judge what is and isn’t a powerful experience for someone. I would challenge YOU to get up in front of cameras every day for six months, emotionally naked, and see whether you really think any of those false psychological issues exist at the end. If anything, I am much healthier afterward than I was before.

      I’m not sure to what you’re referring with “loofah necklaces” or “rich/handsome” husbands, but I know that the emails I’ve received from women and men who found this reality show valuable have touched me deeply.

      I intend to take the lessons I learned throughout the almost decade long process of getting and filming a tv show, and apply them to other endeavors, absolutely. But cut with the self-righteous tone of your comments. It’s boring, cliched and frankly? Unproductive.
      17 minutes ago · Edited · Like · 2

      She’s a changed person, y’all!

      • Queen Neferteeri says:

        True! Just look at the self-actualization that Snookie and JWow have gone through just by being on camera every day for a few weeks at a time.

      • Sacred Scrapbooks Picture Consultant says:

        “The normal, emotionally healthy Julia I am today.”

        –JA, 12/06/07

      • If anything, I am much healthier afterward than I was before.

        So emotionally healthy, she requires a weekend therapist while in NYC for a few days to tell her that weight isn’t her problem, YOU SHITHEADS!

      • JuLIAR Allison (will never the learn button) says:

        Julia, flying your bitch flag in Facebook comments is boring, cliched and frankly? Unproductive.

        Go find that vibrator you were tweeting about and do yourself a favor.

      • *fist shakes* says:

        I started reading that thinking you’d made up a fake response from Julia. And then it turned out to be real. Embarrassing.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        OMG she didn’t write that, and with a “frankly” and two “deeplys” to match. Oh yes, idiot, I am SURE you’re getting so many emails from people who were deeply touched when you dry-humped Chris and fucked over Justin.

        God what a condescending, self-important tool. More therapy, asshole — whatever you claim to be doing isn’t working.

      • JFA says:

        This really deserves its own post. Wow.

      • The Tortuous and the Hair says:

        Is she seriously claiming to have gotten up in front of cameras every day for six months?

        If this were true, they would have had to pay her, the producers, a director, a director of photography, gaffer(s), grip(s), art department, hair, make-up, wardrobe, craft service, catering, drivers, PAs, leasing of equipment and vehicles, location fees, production office staff, etc. every day for six months although Bravo only ordered a scant 8 episodes. The budget would have had to be enormous, not to mention the expense of Emily and Amy and their respective crews in SF and NY. It is to laugh.

        She’s making it out to be some sort of noble, soul-baring DOCU-series when in fact it is a tawdry, run-of-the-mill reality show. Julia, you’re not fooling anyone!

  5. Lady Donk Donk says:

    Dude fuck this woman. She reminds me of my high school gf. I’m glad I married a european.

  6. Wonkeye says:

    She’s going for the sympathy (bloat) vote. Please. Fillers gone wild is my guess. This is the 2012 version of “I was date raped so my paper sucks.”

    • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

      So her strategy is she would rather be thought of a bulimic than a busted faced Donkey who shot too many fillers in her face? Maybe. She’s going on WWHL, maybe she is afraid Andy will ask about the extensive fillers and she thinks to answer bulimia will garner more sympathy or if she tells Producers, he’ll be too shame shackled to ask.

      • Worrisome Pelts on a Bloat-Faced Donkey says:

        She sees the fame she thought this show would bring slipping through her fingers and she’s grasping at anything to stay relevant. If she can’t be America’s Sweetheart she’ll be America’s Cautionary Tale.

        Can you imagine Donkey appearing on talk shows and visiting schools as the [bloated] face of eating disorders? Donkey can.

        • Wonkeye says:

          She’s Miss Advised’s answer to Taylor. So tragic. So scammy.

        • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

          Wait, Julia isn’t America’s Sweetheart? The nation isn’t enchanted by her refreshing honesty, humor and style, presented like a lunatic imagines what a wacky but attractive sitcom character should be like? Give a single girl a break! She’ll blow you when you’re going to see your mom. Badly, and she’ll never let you forget it, and you’ll cringe when you see her kissing your mom hello with that mouth that’s just been on your dick, but so what? She’s irrepressible! That Julia, she just can’t help being so charming and funny and sexy! And, such a girly-girl girl. AMERICA has decided they just love Julia, their new favorite screwball comedy heroine- looking for love in all the wrong places, lol!

          *considers the state of things, cries*

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      Or I was date raped so don’t have to turn a paper in and will be in the Hamptons.

      • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

        No one wants her or will invite her to the Hamptons.

        • Joardache & the Pelts says:

          Remember the hamptons butt juice sponsored party when all those twats were sitting around that tiny pool squirting? Good times.

      • Julia's Authentic Pelts says:

        I love the “can’t turn paper in if you need me I’ll be in the Hamptons” story. Jack, thank Greg you are here to tell us all the tales of the early Donk days.

  7. The Cabinet of Dr. Bobby says:

    This is all so she can prove that we’re actually “hating on her for talking about her bulimia.” Don’t feed the troll. She’s just editing and spinning even more so visitors to this site will think we are “mean” and “making fun of her illness.”

    So, so transparent.

    • Cut. Don't use that. says:

      I can see through this hick like a window.

      • Donkeycam now! (MSc) says:

        She is a window and the sub-standard caulking around her is starting to melt and it ain’t pretty.

    • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

      BINGO (wings)

    • Imminent Meltdown says:

      I thought we hated her cause she couldn’t cook?
      #Amyschili

    • Nail. On. The, Head
      It’s enough to make ya wish for a new post, pronto.

      I’m curious if anyone (w/ access to IP’s) has thought about cross-referencing IP’s of the recent white nits & this current tipster’s IP w/ all of the IP’s in the History section of the Miss Advised Wikipedia page …

    • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

      It’s actually one of the more evil and cunning things she’s ever done: going on television and lying so extremely hard, that her bulimia was ever something her skeptics would hold against her. No, it’s the other nine-hundred and counting examples of your grasping, lying, bridge-burning, delusional and pretentious self-promotion, and then a new cycle of grasping, lying, bridge-burning, delusional and pretentious self-promotion the next month. rinse and repeat for years, that keep us coming back for more. year after year of more grasping, lying, bridge-burning, delusional and pretentious self-promotion. Get it?

      Saying people dislike you or attack you because of your bulimia is such a pathetic lie. No one attacks someone with that affliction, I’ve never seen anyone ever do it here, it is never any topic for mirth. Yer just such a liar Blanche, yar.

    • sausage curls/fingers says:

      DING DING DING

  8. Cut. Don't use that. says:

    I’m sure Juliar herself tipped you off about this, since she needs SOMETHING out there to cast her in a more sympathetic light as she gets worse and worse on the show.

    This is a calculated PR move by Donkey herself. Nothing more. Cheesy Scheme Skillets, bitches.

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      My thoughts, too. Don’t feed the troll, er, donkey, Mamma Jacy!

    • Worrisome Pelts on a Bloat-Faced Donkey says:

      She gets the eps a couple of days before they air, doesn’t she? She wouldn’t be above making a major play for sympathy if she knows she’s going to look like a psycho tomorrow night.

      • JuLIAR Allison (will never the learn button) says:

        Yup. Agree.

        Or she’s setting up act one of her “I’ve been through hell and made it out the other side, you can do it too” self help column.

        She’s latched on to this girl’s blog post and is probably taking notes so she can mimic the emotional rollercoaster. Donkey has found her new grift and conveniently it involves writing all about herself.

        “Health isn’t just what’s on the surface.” A powerful and moving post about healing, sexuality & spirituality. – http://www.sirenabernal.com/my-healing-journey-part-2-my-sabbatical-my-sexuality-and-my-spirituality/

        @SirenaBernal – girl, I sent your pieces to SIX of my friends and told them “READ IMMEDIATELY!” LOVED it. Really powerful stuff. Thank you.

        • JFA says:

          Oh jesus, can you imagine how annoying it would be to be this bitch’s friend? Getting trite articles at all hours of the night in your inbox with desperate exhortations to READ IMMEDIATELY ZOMG.

          Not even the slightest bit obnoxious.

      • JuLIAR Allison (will never the learn button) says:

        Haha, She’d like to disprove your notion Worrisome! How dare you!

        “Tomorrow’s episode of @BravoTV’s ‪#MissAdvised‬ is my favorite yet & the only one in which I don’t sob hysterically. Coincidence? I THINK NOT. ”

        And then… ewww. Some thoughts are for twitter and some are best kept in your head. This tweet falls into the latter category:

        “This @StandardNY suite says: SEX ME UP. Of course I’m here alone. It should come with a complimentary vibrator, damnit. “

  9. Scarf Bombardier says:

    Wow, she’s really going to love her 40s, when her metabolism peaces for good.

    • miss assvice says:

      She needs help. I really hope she seeks out professional help this time. It is more serious than the usual snark as it could kill her. The botox and surgeries are bad as well but bulimia can have far longer more serious damage.

  10. AFGHANI says:

    Definitely a Donkey. If it was one of her “”friends”" there would be some context or info about how they found this out. Or it would be coming from an email address the mods have seen before. Even more likely, they’d just do it under their real name, because the mods seem to have a lot of discretion and respect people’s privacy for the most part.

    Julia, get real– no one here hates on you because of your weight or your looks. Realistically, these things are at best a visible reminder of what happens when someone gets obsessed with short-cut “solutions” like juviderm, botox, fillers, whatever. Your attempt to make this place look like it’s a simplistic place where people point and laugh at your face is not going to work.

  11. anon says:

    Sorry if this has been posted before, but wanted to let Bay Area cat ladies know that there will be a screening party hosted by Emily Morse and Good Vibrations tomorrow from 6-9pm at 111 Minna Gallery. (They’re going to show the new episode at 7pm along with the east coast with a screener DVD.) Who’s going to be there?

    Emily Morse ‏@SexWithEmily
    ‪#MissAdvised‬, SCREENING PARTY, tomorrow night. 111 Minna Gallery. San Francisco. Who’s in? http://ow.ly/bZO9u

    • Is THAT why D0nkey is holed up by herself in a NYC hotel, to dodge this?

      • Malformed Face (Like a Bloated Deli Ham Left in a Hot Mercedes C Class) says:

        She must be comped to be in NYC, no way she’s paying for the Standard hotel.

    • Joardache & the Pelts says:

      Oh is Good Vibrations a dildo company? Oh yes it is. That Emily is so edgy.

      • Andy Wintour hacks (up a furball) says:

        It’s a sex shop (or two) in SF. I imagine they are doing this independently of the show so as to drum up business. 111 Minna also happens to be exactly the halfway point between my office and home. If I remember, have time, and care enough, maybe I’ll stop by. Most likely not, although I could use a good dildo.

  12. Albie Quirky says:

    Julia, if you’re reading this, get help. Get into a residential program. I seriously thank God every day that I am still in recovery from my own eating disorder. Ask your parents for financial help if you need it; you are fortunate to have parents with the resources to help.

    Get off the hamster wheel of chasing half-assed celebrity and non-starter relationships and start getting healthy, mentally and physically. You have opportunities for healing that most people don’t have: you’re self-employed, you don’t have kids or aging parents to care for, and you’ve got people in your life who can fund your stay at an excellent treatment program. Please, and I say this as someone whose food and body issues almost killed her myself, don’t piss away this chance to make your life better.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      P. S. I still don’t like you, but that doesn’t mean I can’t have compassion for you in a crisis.

      P.P.S. If you’re not actually having a crisis, shame on you forever.

      • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

        Thisity-this.

      • bitchface says:

        Um, she’s FINE …

        “If anything, I am much healthier afterward than I was before. I’m not sure to what you’re referring with “loofah necklaces” or “rich/handsome” husbands, but I know that the emails I’ve received from women and men who found this reality show valuable have touched me deeply.

        I intend to take the lessons I learned throughout the almost decade long process of getting and filming a tv show, and apply them to other endeavors, absolutely.”

  13. Queen Neferteeri says:

    I’m calling BS on her ever having bulimia. I’d believe she’s a 3-time winner of the Nobel Prize in Physics than her being bulimic. Sympathy ploy.

    • Donkeycam now! (MSc) says:

      Totally.

      This well-timed release of that piece of (mis)information has Donkey’s hooveprints all over it.

      She had already said that even her family refused to believe her alleged bulimia.

      • Queen Neferteeri says:

        And she already hauled out the “they make fun of me for being bulimic” load of bullshit, in a pathetic ploy for sympathy. That’s just so the casual viewer won’t know that she’s held up for ridicule/admonition because she’s an awful person who lies, manipulates, uses, and abuses people to get whatever petty thing she wants at any given moment.

        At least some (myself included) have doubted that she has ever had bulimia, but nobody has ever mocked it. The outrage here is mainly for shit like emailing her ex’s fiancee to plant seeds of doubt about his fidelity, outing another ex’s alleged mental illness, using her “internationally syndicated column” (most popular in countries with near-zero literacy rates) to settle personal scores, and so on.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      My theory is she flirted with it. Made herself puke a couple of times. Her room-mate heard her, told her to stop. And she turned that into a raging case of hard-core bulimia for self-promotion purposes.

      Then again, the face bloat gives me pause.

      • Then again, the face bloat gives me pause.

        That’s what he said.

      • Queen Neferteeri says:

        That’s a plausible theory. Take a tiny sliver of something and blow it up into a mountain.

        As for the face bloat, I think she’s gained weight. Not being in the TV industry, I assume that the confessionals are filmed after the show has been filmed and has been at least somewhat edited into episodes. Then they get the participants to talk about specific incidents that are going to be part of the show and splice in the choice bits. So, my hunch is that she started stuffing her face after the show was filmed and before the confessionals.

        Not fat, but definitely chunking out.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          Her face and hand bloat when her body is thinner than usual are really indicative of bulimia. In the shitshow when she goes out with Craigslist guy, she tries on some tight-fitting dresses and her bod looks slender, but he has huge moonface.

      • Donkeycam now! (MSc) says:

        She probably saw a Lifetime movie about bulimia and, after a few “sips” of wine and a few “bites” of chocolate, thought it would be a cool way to get Momsers and Dad$ers attention.

        She then started to feign symptoms but her parents, knowing her since the day she was born (or maybe because Momsers saw the same movie), quickly saw through the ruse.

        Donks, being one who never learns from her past, is now pulling the same trick on her fans in the Stans and her (meager) TV audience, in a desperate attempt to buy herself a sympathy pass for her obnoxious behavior.

        As per the face bloat, I will go for the simplest explanation: overuse of cosmetic procedures.

  14. sausage curls/fingers says:

    I don’t doubt this is Julia, expecting a flood of responses that somehow make fun of bulimia or say “Oh, THAT’S why her face is messed up! Even better!”

    I’m sure everyone knows someone who is dealing with an eating disorder. A few friends of mine have struggled with anorexia and it kills me to know they constantly deal with something of that magnitude. There’s nothing to laugh at and there’s nothing deplorable about it. What IS deplorable is using it as a ploy for internet popularity and sympathy.

    As always, it’s your actions that make you a shitty person, Julia, not your jowls.

  15. This one is a no-boner says:

    Julia, if this is true, please go home to Chicago for a while and have a talk with your parents and work on a treatment plan. In private. People might actually believe you if you go offline and seek help. No one is rooting for you, and this is why (parses her Twatter feed):
    You had a gregdamned mini bar removed from your room? I bet the staff was thrilled.
    You’re back to Twatting Nick Bilton? What happend to hugging the fuck out of SuzyHM?
    You’re desperado tweeting Ivanka Trump? Schemey you are! No, she will not see you while you are in NYC. Her husbands paper nailed you to the cross a couple of weeks ago. Not a good thing. You’re on a pathetic West Coast reality shit show that no one is watching. Her reality show (Celeb Apprentice) is a show that raises money for charities and showcases her business savvy and actual work ethic. Are you angling for Celebrity Apprentice? Schemey transparent weirdo. People like Ivanka (I know her) have politely engaged people like you their entire lives… you are out of your league. And that’s not a bad thing, stay in your lane.
    All that said, I can’t *imagine* why you can’t find a partner/bf/spouse. You’re a schemer and that’s why I can’t tolerate you, not your supposed bulimia.

    • Holly Molet, she really did have the bar removed?!? WHO DOES THAT? & If I’m reading Twitter right, it was approximately 4:30 a.m. EST when D0nkey brayed this to her more than 70,000+ bought-&-paid-for followers:

      <b<Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison
      Would it be so wrong to call the front desk & politely ask them to bring BACK the minibar chocolate? (Um, definitive sign it’s time for bed)

      How sad-ballz is it that a self-proclaimed ‘dating expert’ can’t rustle up anyone to come sex her up in her comped StandardNY suite (& take ‘after glow’ fauxtos of a pensive D0nkey in the window) & instead spends the night tweeting about her email exchanges w/ Dad$er?

      • Fameless Shamewhore says:

        Love you for the “Holly Molet” reference! Did anyone ever work out what that meant?

  16. cupcake cray cray says:

    *bell rings* round three!

    Kirsten Osolind Leading a national awareness movement that protests the perils of reality show t.v. aspirations among our country’s youth may be a mountainous climb…but unproductive? No. To restore our country’s contributions to global productivity and innovation, we need to encourage young folks to build cool things, to think inventively, to volunteer, to do something other than whine and obsess over their own lives. Every day, Julia, every one of us – every SINGLE HUMAN BEING ON THIS PLANET – wakes up emotionally naked with an opportunity to change the world for good. With or without cameras. XO.
    about an hour ago · Like · 2

    Kirsten Osolind Ps. I think its kinda funny that you – or your “handlers” – are marking my comments as SPAM when I am merely posing thoughtful, kind commentary…..

    I love the “XO” thrown in there for that extra bitchy zing.

  17. KashMoney says:

    Watching Julia on “her new show” is enough to make anyone throw up. I don’t know that that makes it an eating disorder.

  18. "Pilot" is the new "keynote" says:

    There will be a NYC “viewing party” on July 23rd, with Donk present: https://twitter.com/amylaurentmatch/status/222285994282590213

  19. bitchface says:

    I know Annie Blahblah is yesterday’s news now, but I didn’t see this in here? (from July 5)

    And here’s the full length, unedited version of that ELLE column about Annie Lalla …
    ELLE
    GUINEA PIG OF LOVE EXPERT #2: THE LOVE COACH
    By Julia Allison

    I’m on a first date with a fellow named William, and I don’t feel like myself. I’m not laughing, I’m not leaning forward eagerly, I’m not lobbing question after question at him like an overzealous headhunter. My love coach, Annie Lalla, has told me to stop with all that already, and along with it, get rid of the deference, the modesty (both real and false), the praise, and the stock conversation topics. Awesome. Pretty much everything I do – except drink – to make the inherently awkward inaugural date into something at least moderately comfortable. And given this is a bike date – as in, we’re riding bicycles – I’m not exactly uncorking a bottle of Merlot as we pedal.

    In other words: I’ve been left alone, bereft of defenses, to marinate in the juices of my unease. But where I see coping mechanisms for staying relaxed while interacting with a new person, Annie sees a schtick that’s keeping me from being my most authentic self – and even from true love. Given that that’s why I hired her in the first place, I’m going to listen. Or at least try.

    According to her website, love coach Annie Lalla helps her clients rid themselves of “toxic patterns, develop romantic esteem, assuage shame/blame and cultivate deep, resilient relationships that last a lifetime.” During our first session together, she calls me out for using “an impenetrable veneer of persona to manipulate the way the interaction goes” on a date so that I never find myself “cornered, vulnerable, exposed, uncomfortable, confused, looking dumb.”

    Busted. She’s right. I have a dating shtick, and I’m good at it. I laugh, I question rapid fire, like Barbara Walters caffeinated by three pumpkin spice lattes. Then I laugh again, and I question more. I mix that in with my standard self-deprecating stories, and if all else fails? I ask him about his ex. Honestly, I’m terrified of of conversational silences. After all, what if it … gets awkward?

    What if, indeed.

    Annie encourages me to embrace that “what if,” and cautions me not to confuse my “habits and patterns” with being myself. I’ll admit – I’ve dated so much, I often go on auto-pilot. But at what cost? “The cost,” says Annie, “is organic discovery, connection and intimacy.” I can see that. By choosing to keep things safe with my dating schtick, I’ve eliminated both ends of the spectrum of possibilities: having the date from hell, and allowing a dream date, filled with magic.

    It occurs to me that I may actually be a bit of a control freak, with a fairly thick (if subconscious) facade that has served as my protection – but also stood in the way of intimacy. I don’t want to get hurt – and bad dates can hurt. “That’s okay,” Annie reassures me that I’m not the only one. “You were just trying to protect yourself. Now instead of that, shelve your fear and allow yourself to be re-invented anew in this moment, without having to be whoever you were yesterday.”

    Annie doesn’t say this, but I get the gist: her specific instructions to me for the date with William are much like stretches for a runner. They’re not even remotely comfortable at first, but you don’t expect them to be. They’re just to get your body warm, to loosen you up, to get outside your comfort zone, to make you more flexible. And even if you’re grasping your toes, hamstrings burning until tears form in your eyes, you’re glad you did them afterward.

    That’s pretty much how I feel about Annie’s exercises. They’re painful at the time. In fact, I sort of want to kill her as I’m sitting there stone-faced through yet another of William’s sardonic musings. A few things go through my head: 1) I feel like a dick. 2) I want him to like me, and I‘m concerned that without my generous and obvious appreciation of his humor, he won’t, and 3) I’m panicking that he won’t find me intriguing without my arsenal of journalistic interrogatories. Questions pop up throughout the afternoon: Will he think I expect to just talk about myself (as he has to be the one to query me)? Will my cool body language (“lean back, lean back” orders Annie) turn him off? Will he tell all his friends I’m a selfish, dour bitch who didn’t even crack a smile at any of his jokes?

    I feel like I’m doing a cartwheel with one hand tied behind my back, and I have to concentrate harder than I have on any date in the past year. It’s exhausting. I would give up dating and move to an ashram if I had to do this every time. But afterward? Just as Annie predicted: I have a totally new perspective. Sometimes you don’t even realize how much of a schtick you have until it’s taken away.

    More than that, I realize that my one-schtick-fits-all approach to dating isn’t the most authentic approach – nor is it the most satisfying. While I’m eager to re-integrate laughter back into my repertoire, I’m now careful not to laugh just to fill a silence, but instead to really give the guy a chance to earn that laughter. And while I do plan to ask questions (I’m a journalist, it’s torturous not to), I now see that giving the poor fellow verbal space to play offense, instead of just defensive responding, isn’t such a bad move either. After all, a real relationship isn’t just me holding the reigns – ostensibly he’ll get a chance to direct, too, and I might as well find out early on where he’d like to go!

    As fascinating as I found the first date anti-autopilot exercise, unearthing this pattern was really valuable insomuch as it’s a symptom of a much deeper problem – perhaps the biggest obstacle between me and the relationship I seek: my deep seated insecurity that, should a man discover my flaws, he will no longer love me. That sounds so obvious when I type it out, but trust me, it hadn’t actually occurred to me that the way this manifests is a disheartening (and by definition, impossible) quest for perfection. My house must be perfect, my face, perfect, my body, perfect, my career, perfect, my educational history, perfect, my friendships, perfect, my emotional state, perfect, my google search, perfect.

    Yeah, so how’s that working out for me? Ummm … not that well. Nothing about me is “perfect,” I’ll just tell you right now. Not even close. And so I’ve been in a constant state of agitation, feeling I’m not good enough, for … well, for about twenty years. Oops? During one of her exercises, Annie has me mess up my perfectly made bed, re-arrange my perfectly fluffed pillows, throw my perfectly folded blanket to the floor as “homeopathic amounts of disorganization.” I can feel my heart palpitating, the disorder is physically uncomfortable. I feel a loss of control: THINGS AREN’T IN THEIR PERFECT PLACE!

    “Perfectionism,” says Annie, “is an invisible shackle keeping you back from being free and letting others be free around you. Imperfect is real, raw, wanton and sexy.” And then I learn one of the most important lessons of my adult life: until I’m okay with my own imperfection – no one else can be.

    The ah-has kept coming, in waves. There is no such thing as perfection – frankly, if we were smart, the word shouldn’t even exist. I’d been living my life, knowing that I wasn’t perfect and ashamed of it, afraid that everyone would catch on and judge me the way I’d been judging myself. Meanwhile, I was desperately seeking unconditional love – the kind of love that doesn’t peace out if I’m thirty minutes late, ten pounds overweight, face covered in acne, a cranky PMS terrorist or even a selfish, inconsiderate bitch. Because I have been all those things, and worse. I have also been all those things – and better, too. I am just me, made up of beauty and ugliness and love and fear, all mixed together.

    Then Annie has me look in my big white floor length mirror – actually look – and see the girl inside of me, the girl I would never judge so harshly. I began to understand what my perfectionism had done to myself – and how the very walls I had put up because I was afraid of people seeing my messiness had actually kept them away. I was messy, deep down. I was messy – but that mess was beautiful. It was my mess, and I was proud of it.

    In that moment, I thought to myself for the first time: you know what? I’m pretty great, just the way I am. In that moment, I realized that one day, someone will love me unconditionally – not because I’ve finally figured out how to be perfect … but because I’ve finally showed them my mess.

    And they’ll think it’s beautiful, too.

    • bitchface says:

      She really thinks this “unconditional love” myth is going to save her (btw this article seems like some rehash of something of hers from years ago – lather/rinse)

      No one loves unconditionally. The closest we get is probably to our children. Maybe our pets. But she seems to think that good and healthy relationships are this “unconditional love” BS. She seems to misunderstand the definition of the phrase.

  20. Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison Also, I’ve made the questionable decision not to wear makeup, just red Tarte lip stain. Would Kate Middleton approve? Unclear.

    Julia Allison ‏@JuliaAllison My outfit this morning, which involves pearls & a sort of tutu/pettiskirt, is either brilliant or awful and I’m genuinely not sure which …

    Assuming that ‘ASSHAT is what you’re going for, you did fine, D0nkey!
    [img]http://i48.tinypic.com/15eb62o.png[/img]
    (CAPTCHA code = the bee’s knees

  21. SchemeyNutButter says:

    So … possibly being perceived as an alcoholic by hotel staff is somehow worse [there is no judgement on CandyRock Mountain!] than actually being the guest who requested that an entire mini-bar be removed because it contains chocolate? Okay then.

    [img]http://i50.tinypic.com/2wdplzp.png[/img]

    • juliaspublicist's rococo pile of polyester juliaspublicist says:

      Fuck you, you bloated fucktard!

    • bitchface says:

      It’s bad enough she does it. It’s bad enough she shares it. But what’s the worst is that she thinks it’s cute/clever/self deprecating in a cute/clever way….

  22. Second Fridge says:

    Was I rung??

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