Well, what do you know? I woke up in a happy mood with many, many, many little birdies singing at my window. They had stories to share! The short version? Julia Allison, fucked face, is fucked.
One wanted to shed light on Julia’s recent appearance on the Chicago Fox affiliate’s morning show. If you think that was an appearance set up by Bravo’s publicity machine, you would be sorely mistaken. Julia set it up, apparently to impress family and friends who attended her meemaw’s memorial. She thought, and I don’t know why she would, that they would be roundly impressed by her hustling in her time of grief. And apparently, she was not amused when family (yes, I said family) and friends told her that her timing and attention seeking were beyond crass. Yes, the Baugher clan is disgusted by our Donkey. Lord knows how Robin and Pettigrew will react once the show premieres, because boy is it going to be a doozy.
You might have read that Julia’s dates on Miss Advised were set up by LA-based RR Casting. The victims who were wrangled in to date a maniacal donkey were found on Craigslist, and not under “Casual Encounters,” as you would presume. No, casting notices were posted under the “TV/Film/Video” section. And indeed the first episode features a man who Donkey says she found on the online classified site. What you don’t know is that, despite knowing these dates were completely set up, she actually thought that the men who were paid to appear on her show would be floored by her remarkable beauty and whimsical personality. And when, as expected, these men recoiled in horror, Julia unleashed her inner rage beast. In fact, we know of one man, who calls Julia “Falsies” still cowers in the fetal position in the corner of her bedroom at night. Apparently, going on a date with our donkey is THAT much of a traumatic experience.
Let me see. . . what else? Oh, yeah! I, here and now, want to push the kibosh in the completely rude suggestion that Julia has deformed her face with injectables. According to sources, Julia claims that she only gets “touch-ups.” What I want to know is, what are they touching her up with? The Space Needle?
I mean, seriously. LOOK AT HER FUCKED UP FACE!
Anyway, this has been mentioned before, but someone in the reality television show industry wanted to reiterate that it is difficult to film someone who is unemployed, and yes, you media parrots, despite what Julia says, she is unemployed. You would think that filming someone who farts around on a couch all day can make interesting television. Apparently it doesn’t. Which made filming Julia’s story arc (How can I put this delicately?). . . difficult. Indeed, what more than a few little birdies have been telling me is that our dear, deformed donkey was the most difficult of the three during filming. She thought her call time was merely a suggestion and would leave the crew waiting for hours. Julia, we’re hearing, was so unprofessional and difficult to work with that she may be blackballed. Are you surprised?
Not that Julia has anything to worry about. Some sources doubt she will ever want to be on a reality show ever again after the show premieres. Let me just say this now: her portrayal is vicious. Sources fully expect her to file a lawsuit once she sees all the episodes. (She hasn’t seen the entire show yet.) It must be a shame that she signed that draconian contract, because it will be a lawsuit she will never, ever, in the land of ever win.
So what do we have to look forward to? Well, according to one source, the leaks we have been getting regarding Miss Advised are about to turn into a full force deluge. (Apparently they love us.) Once the show airs, leaks will be considered “behind-the-scenes sneak peeks!”
Finally, I have been instructed by another source to pay close attention to the show’s credits. She/he wouldn’t say why, but the part that lists who gets thanked/who provided promotional support and services would greatly embarrass our donkey.
Who’s popping popcorn?
UPDATE: Just to give you an idea of how contrived this show will be and how Julia mistook filming this show as real life despite its contrivances, this is one of the men she went on a date with while filming this show:
His name is Keith Pollock and he works at Elle, the same place the production company arranged for Julia to have a column:
Oh, and he’s gay: