Julie Albertson: Sabotaging Husband Hunt But Showing Her Haters She Can Still Snag Hot Dudes

Imagine the bawling that must have followed the balling, huh? Not only did she manage to get laid by this hot piece, but SHE’LL SHOW US!! She is NOT a bloated, braying, desperate train wreck!! This dude has agreed to go on FOUR DATES with her! And she’s so grateful, she’s going to completely incinerate any chance of a future with the guy (EDS: As if) by posting his bare-chested photo on the Internet.

This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

309 Responses to Julie Albertson: Sabotaging Husband Hunt But Showing Her Haters She Can Still Snag Hot Dudes

  1. Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

    And he is coffee bar dude.

    http://www.facebook.com/stetler

    I know you cat ladies already figured this out, but I am intensely errand-running.

    • LEFOOLIEH says:

      lmmfao

    • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

      So last weeks “date” was at her place with wine. And this weeks “date” is at his place with a computer – I’m guessing they are just both work sessions as he does her website and maybe they bang after – but they certainly don’t seem to be dates in the traditional sense.

      I mean, I would not be bragging about a guy who didn’t pick me up, dressed like that and could not be bothered to look up from his computer. Oh, honey.

    • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

      In regards to Coffee Bar – that’s downtown LA which is a 45 minutes to 55 minutes from the Marina, depending on traffic – it’s also where he works – so on two of their “dates”, she drove to him? One is for coffee, one for wine at her place, one to hang out at his place with a computer?

      In other words… work sessions and not dates? I think this guy is a new prop… move over Lily.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        He’s self-employed now, per his LinkedIn.

        I don’t know. Maybe they’re hooking up. I can’t imagine saying to someone I’m working with “Hey, unbutton your shirt so I can take a photo of you with my dog.”

        • Donkey must be letting him spelunk the clam dungeon in lieu of pymt for web services rendered.

        • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

          Yeah, I don’t doubt he’s all up in her green skin tags – it’s just a “date” for a Donkey used to mean a limo and picking out one of five dresses the guy brought for her.

          Now she’s driving an hour for a quick bang or getting a stolen ballon on Valentine’s day as a “date.”

          Sad, really.

  2. ShesJustStupid says:

    Oh lord. how OLD is this guy? And he has some website called “Dynamics” with a tagline that says “Don’t Ask, don’t tell, don’t tweet.” And he went to Cal State Poly, which, given her snobbiness, probably doesn’t sit well. He’s her web developer. She’s dating her employee.

    • Charles Forman was her Jake Lodwick Lite says:

      I’d like to think she’s grown beyond her superficial obsession with schools and perceived prestige, but no, it’s probably just a case of not having any standards whatsoever anymore.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      He graduated college in 2003, per his LinkedIn, so he’s about her age.

      Also, he got fired or laid off in December. Anyway, he’s self-employed so lots of time to hang out in JABsylvania.

      • pearipathertic donkey says:

        Uh oh. We all know what increased face-time with Julia means…crash and burn!

  3. Can-Swiss says:

    He appears to be a good-looking dude. But who sits around with their shirt open like that? Douchie.

    • one too twee says:

      Exactly, so freakin’ weird. Was the AC out? Did some desperado rip his buttons off in a vain attempt at seduction? No way this was a date (in HIS mind, at least). He probably doesn’t mind the fauxto-taking because they are just friends. (Or she stuck a nanny cam on his bookshelf.) Greasy didn’t mind the fauxtos, either, and he was apparently on the hunt for an actual tiny ‘n cute girlfriend.

      • Donkeycam Now! says:

        I think Donks staged that fauxto to show us, and the Internet, what a hot dude she is dating.

        FREE LILLY!!!!!!!!!!!

        • Lilly Liberation Front (formerly Whackjob of Whimsy) says:

          You rang?

          She really is adorable! Does anyone know how old Lilly is?

      • Birthday chicken says:

        The photo is strange. My boyfriend and I didn’t reach the state of being on our respective laptops with each other until well after a year. I bet she thinks this is some kind of intimacy milestone but it’s actually pathetic. Or maybe I’m just an olds.

        • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

          Then again, you probably don’t pay your boyfriend to build websites for you. Or are you into that, you kinky bitch?

          • birthday chicken says:

            No, he’s an accounting nerd. 🙂
            But I love my bf’s hairy chest. This guy looks like he waxes. :/

    • TJ KELLEIGH'S FISTED ASSHOLE says:

      I do it all the time because it’s more comfortable, but I chalk it up to being a gay that wears slim-fitting button-ups.

  4. Scooby Don't says:

    Given what I’ve unfortunately learned about Donkey’s sexual history on this site (mind bleach couldn’t get those synapse stains out), I can’t stop thinking about Lilly howling away as Donkey gets serviced by her rent-a-stud.
    Bringing your dog over to the guy’s apartment for a booty call?
    Who does that?

    • one too twee says:

      Dumbass was always having to schlep her dog and donkey show to mens’ apts in NYC, too, usually late at night. Julia’s Vadge Delivery Service, now open in LA!

      • Worrisome Pelts says:

        Meanwhile, Julia’s Cunt Delivery Service just celebrated the beginning of its fourth decade in Sirous Bizniz.

    • LEFOOLIEH says:

      Scoobs, I love “synapse stains” #willuseIRL

    • Donkey of Perdition says:

      The “feeling” I get from this picture is similar to when a one night stand won’t leave your place in the morning, insisting on hanging around for breakfast/watch tv. You pretend to be engrossed in work and hopefully they’ll get bored and leave.

      IMHO he’s just sport fucking or dating her, doing it for the lulzs.

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      I think I know why.

      Julia: Who’s a good girl! Lily doggie! Sweetie! Look at the camera! Who’s a good girl?

      Lily:/oh mi gawd! she’s talking to me! she knows I’m alive and not a stuffed animal! o joy! o rapture! finally to be noticed for the good girl i am!

      /Julia takes picture

      Julia: Oh gosh, shirtless guy, I just had to stand on top of your record collection to get a picture of Lily just now. She had the cutest expression on her face!

      Shirtless Guy: mm. Uh-huh. /reopens Snood

  5. ShesJustStupid says:

    It appears that he’s 30, so not a kid. Thankfully. He also doesn’t appear to have a very open online presence, so he’ll love her obvs.

  6. fig says:

    It’s like the tech version of a cliche TV scene where the middle aged lady is lusting over the pool boy. Bare chested web developing, really? Is the next scene where she offers him lemonade/a spare surge protector?

  7. donk donk says:

    On a positive note, Lily looks surprisingly happy in this photo.

    • New Year New You says:

      I think that it’s Lily who’s dating him, and she took Donkey with her to his apartment.

    • Barnaby says:

      That is the first thing I noticed about the photo!

    • Donkeycam Now! says:

      Lilly looks freshly groomed but, happy?…. Dunno….

      When I see Lilly as a photo prop, I always imagine her holding a sign that reads “Help me! My life is hell! I have been kidnapped by a donkey! Call the ASPCA now!”

  8. Pissholes in the snow says:

    This is one of the times when the Canklehausen really burns for me. There are guys I dated for a year whom I never took a picture of– partly because I rarely pause to document the things I’m doing but also because it was unnecessary to document us hanging out and doing normal stuff? I feel like the only reason you’d be compelled to photograph a dude you hooked up with once is that you fear/assume you’ll never see him again so you want the memory (/proof for your creepy online “exes” FB folder). Which in this case is probably a fair assessment.

  9. JFA says:

    I feel sorta bad making fun of this guy…but, wow.

    https://plus.google.com/photos/117320082834821680818/albums/5733541007956832577

    He seems harmless, a bit dim and has no idea what he is getting himself into. Hopefully they will have their fun and he will make it out unscathed. Because in no way is he “good enough” for her, in her mind. And posting pics like that is seriously just nauseating. Grow up Donkey.

    • one too twee says:

      Wow, indeed. His photoshoot should get together with her Gawker photoshoot.

    • DirtyLakeMichigan says:

      Oh lawwwwwd.
      What is the purpose of these photos?
      Fremdschämen

    • Can-Swiss says:

      At least he has his clothes on (unlike Donkey in her Gawker photos).

    • Whoa! Those fauxtos sure changed my impression of him — dunno why, but he seemed to me like a naive 22-year-old who just moved from Canada & didn’t know anydonkey in LA, so I was feeling bad for him — but, while not sure just what it is that sock-less dress shoes triggers in me, I now feel that he whatever he gets (mocked, hacked, STD, skintags) by ass-ociation w/ Donkey is only fitting.

      Whomever said in the previous thread (Prof C?) that they were getting a Matt Dillon vibe? Nail. On. Head. All I can see now is MD/DS as the greasy sleaze MD played in There’s Something About Mary.

      • (I accidentally the word deserves)

      • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

        Great minds, Brayella.

        • A guy who wear sock-less dress shoes is most likely the same guy who eventually gets around to turning his underwear inside out on about, oh, day three or four …

          Same guy who doesn’t pack a toothbrush for a trip & just uses someone else’s instead of buying one …

          Same guy who still has last week’s leftover pizza sitting on the broiler pan in the oven …

          Same kind of guy who’s going to let Lilly’s dog shit sit in the corner of his living room until some new chick comes along & picks it up …

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            See, I get you, but it’s also part of this (shudder) Preppie-revival trend.

            Guys actually think they’re being all cutting-edge mens’-magazine and shit.

          • To me, the contrived image is supposed to convey that Party Boy’s socks were left tangled in the bed sheets of whichever wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am hot model he just left begging for more as he shimmied down a fire escape w/ a furious husband in hot pursuit of his spectacular ass.

            Exactly the delusional, egomaniacal male-counterpart of groan-ass (Hi, Mary!) women who wear tiaras to webutard ballz, wouldn’t you agree?

          • fig says:

            So interesting that everyone interprets the sockless thing, but differently. To me it reads “It’s Italian, stupid!”. Maybe because in Germany, authenticity in adopting things from different countries is like a very competitive sport for the well educated.

          • TJ KELLEIGH'S FISTED ASSHOLE says:

            They make loafer socks so that you can wear socks and purposely not have any showing. I wear them all the time, but would never with a full suit on. It’s more of a street fashion look than a business one.

      • JFA says:

        Um…I will forever love Matt Dillon because of “Outsiders” and “Drugstore Cowboy” thank you very much! I think you mean KEVIN Dillon. I hope!

        But yeah. I…don’t know what to make of this guy besides he’s sorta too easy to mock and I almost want to leave him alone. HOwever, these pictures needed to be discussed.

      • bitchface says:

        NO NO NO KEVIN Dillon.

        Do not besmirch my early age lover, Matt Dillon. Hawt. [img]http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-dR_capFoH3I/ThpDLuNtlmI/AAAAAAAAAyM/ibGOR1j_Dfg/s1600/mattdillon.jpg[/img]

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      Dear People with Penises:

      I am writing on behalf of People with Noses and Eyeballs to warn you of a hideous new trend that is cropping up everywhere. As part of the so-called Preppie revival, in which a form of fashion iconography universally hated the first time around is being re-fostered on an unsuspecting public by idiots like Unabashedly Crap, men are now eschewing socks with loafers, blazers, summer suits and even dress shoes. The message intended is “go to hell” – not a very charming one, I think you will agree – the message actually conveyed is “when I take my shoes off they and my feet will stink like Chester Cheetah’s asshole.”

      Please, for the sake of homicidal tendencies everywhere, mine particularly, wear socks when you wear shoes, unless you are wearing sandals, which is also disgusting unless you are a Roman Centurion, a gay Israeli or the Second Coming of Jesus in which case, sorry I was such a hellcat in nursery bible studies I was not expecting to have to take a second nap.

      Fondly,

      Me

      • DSM-V: JFA Edition says:

        Damn. There goes my shot for a torid affair with rrr… I hate socks. Always have. But my theory is the sockless lifestyle is one not to be entered lightly and it isn’t for everyone. If you have stinky feet you just should not do it. And if you can’t afford frequent shoe rotation you just should not do it. There is no excuse for stinky feet.

        • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

          I appreciate that you are aware of the hazards. Most guys into the sockless lifestyle aren’t.

          It still makes no sense to me. Blisters, anyone?

          • DSM-V: JFA Edition says:

            Ahh blisters are an issue. But if u know what brands to avoid, I may get 1 a yr with new shoes. Vans or kicking around the block on Sunday shoes are bad at first for this, but break in quickly. Zegna are also bad bc of a tendency for a very stiff backing. Other than those I’ve never had a problem.
            And I have to say when I wear a suit I wear socks. Would only do sockless if it was a blazer and slacks or something more informal. But that’s why i picked a job where I only have to throw on a suit occasionally.

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            I will kill you last.

      • LEFOOLIEH says:

        I randomly saw Fred (is that his name? The UP guy) while being driven through the city and I’m not sure he was sockless.

    • Fashion Girl says:

      Those pictures are very…escort agency. Let’s just say it.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      Oh come on, hot dude. Oh dear.

    • now you're just some bunny that I used to know says:

      The title of this Photo Series is “Morning After Wedding: Open Bar Edition”

  10. mule on rouge says:

    Dude, this is not what your agent meant by “exposure”.

  11. LEFOOLIEH says:

    No amount of “how fuck” can contain my reaction to dude’s fauxtoshoot, so I’m just going to leave it at oh, honey.

  12. diluted brain says:

    Who posts pictures on twitter or fb after a few dates?? How weird is she? I think the first photo I have with my husband is a couple months into our relationship and I didn’t even take it. I almost pity her for ruining her game before he even starts to consider liking the nutcase.

    • birthday chicken says:

      I snuck a photo on our second date to send to my friend who was in Iraq and was dying to know what he looked like. She was the only one who saw that photo and then months later I showed it to a few people who lived too far to visit, also who weren’t going to meet him in person for some time. They all wanted to know what he looked like and asked first. I never plastered it on any social media site, just sent through email. If people in my immediate circle wanted to know what he looked like, they would have to meet him in person.

      • Wonkeye says:

        I took a polaroid of an insanely hot guy I slept with once, because I knew there wasn’t going to be a second date (he was the dumbs) and I wanted some evidence for when I was eighty and my vadge was all dried up . . . yeah, I had that.

      • diluted brain says:

        Yeah but yours was totally different and not bragging to 30k+ people or whatever the fuck her twitter follower # is these days.

  13. maid of dishonor says:

    god, she’s the worst.

  14. The Final Rose says:

    I have so many questions.

    Did she take the picture that is his new FB profile pic? Or was he recreating the picture for their third date?

    Does he know she’s posting Chippendales shots on Twitter? Is this picture a recreation of a scene from Desparate Housewives where Juliar spills something all over her web developer’s shirt so he has to ‘air out’ while working on her website?

    How does this bloated beast continue to get any tail???

    • MY MONEY IS ON: She took the picture of him, convinced him it would make a great FB profile pic, knowing full well that she could manipulate the connecting of dots one way or another (remember when she posted the airline ticket bought by FlapJack? If some catlady doesn’t solve the riddle in record time, she just trots Lasagna in here to leak scheme-juices for her).

      • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

        I’m convinced that whole laying on the couch pic – as someone stated above – that she pretended she was just taking a pic of Lily… if she said she was taking it of him, his Psycho Alarm should really be going off.

        • I dunno, the more I look at it, the more I see the same self-conscious expression people always try to suppress when they’re trying to pull off the image that they’re completely oblivious to having their picture taken. I just don’t buy that he was so engrossed in his laptop that he was unaware of a donkey scaling his furniture & braying Lilly’s name to get her to look up for the fauxto … but then again, I could be persuaded to buy into the nanny-cam theory someone else suggested.

          Six of one, half a donkey of the other.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        His previous FB profile pics look like crap, so he should at least thank her for a less crap profile pic.

  15. Charles Forman was her Jake Lodwick Lite says:

    That room looks messy to me… like the guy just moved in or something.

  16. virgil reid says:

    i contend he’s got greasy syndrome — he thinks julia is quasi famous, has the hook up to interesting social events and if that wasn’t somewhere on his agenda, he wouldn’t have paid for a fake GQ photo shoot.

    • Isn’t there a fauxto of Greasy I in a pinkish suit, w/OUT socks? At Donkey’s Bi-Polar Barfbray party or something?

      • Albie Quirky says:

        He was sockless (with creepy loafers) at Via’s wedding. Which went nicely with Julie Albertson’s too long and probably covered in goose poop (because they were on a golf course) hem.

        • You’re so good.
          [img]http://rebloggingdonk.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/lookatacatalogandrealizeyoushouldwearsocks.jpg[/img]
          Don’t know where I got the idea of him in a pink suit tho’.

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            /barfs

            /looks at photo through hands

            /barfs again

            The dress. Her leaning awkwardly over the hood of a Dusenberg–no, wait, A FUCKING GOLF CART. His sockless tootsies and “I’m sexy and I know it” air of bonehead faux-nonchalance. The way his hideous tie appears to be pointing directly to his bonezone. The fact that the picture is very sightly out of focus. The fact that he is HOLDING A FUCKING EMPTY COSMO GLASS.

            How did these two clowns not marry each other?

          • Greasy’s shoes look like men’s barco-lounger naugahyde house slippers on loan from the hotel that doesn’t allow guests to go barehoof in the sauna room.

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            He is seriously like a less dapper John Fitzgerald Page.

          • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

            Look at the filth at the bottom of her dress. So Kate Middleton that one, who could not be arsed to spend twenty bucks and hem her dress.

            Greasey probably high-fived her for that.

          • Ass Baughers Syndrome says:

            I call this the Captain Morgan pose.

          • Sake Bombardier says:

            So, slakjaw fetish. . . that’s a thing?

          • Prof. F Camping says:

            @Malformed Face: AND, she tried to sell the dress after the wedding, goose poo and all!

    • Albie Quirky says:

      He definitely has that self-promoting dimbulb Greasy vibe.

      • Ass Baughers Syndrome says:

        Although her head looks small in comparison to his cro-magnum noggin.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          “Cro-Magnum” is the best. “It’s like a Cro-Magnon, only bigger!”

          Yep, she obviously can’t have children with this dude because they would look like the alien from “The Jetsons” or a bobble-head doll.

        • Ass Baughers Syndrome says:

          Eh, typing on iPad sucks.

          • Albie Quirky says:

            Your iPad was hilarious in this case. My iPad just makes me look like a moron.

        • DirtyLakeMichigan says:

          I was just coming here to say this! How does his neck hold up his head? The guy could wear a blow-up swimming pool for a hat.

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      I think you’re right.

      I am trying to think of someone who would pay money to have fake glamour shots taken of themselves who was not obsessed with one day having real glamour shots taken of themselves and I got a big fat zero for that score.

      • bitchface says:

        at Hotel 6, nonetheless

        that looks like one of those pools you find the floating corpse among the crack needles, used condoms and empty 40 ouncers the maids have given up trying to shovel.

        • Titanic Q-Tips (aka jane) says:

          that’s the point right? it’s a faux rat pack fauxto shoot. mixed in with some attempts at scarface. am i stating the obvious? sssf.

          • bitchface says:

            probably, but then the place is not gritty enough if that’s the point of the photo (yes I am contradicting myself)

  17. DSM-V: JFA Edition says:

    Lily would be better off with Romney at this point…

    • DSM-V: JFA Edition says:

      Maybe even a 9 yr old Obama…

    • AFGHANI says:

      Lie. No one would be better off than Romney at this point. He basically disavowed the things that made him seem like a plausible “fix the economy” president. And reversed his previously moderate social stances. The thing he did to the family dog is disgusting but actually pales compared to what he did to a high school classmate who happened to be gay.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Actually, she would be better off with the Romany at this point — “gone with the raggle-taggle Gypsies-oh!” would be a great triumph for that poor thing.

  18. JFA says:

    I’m not even high (yet) but this picture is just SO REDONKULOUS. I DONT’ KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN. It looks like a photograph from the Onion except it’s FOR REAL. She thought this was sexay!!!! HIs expression, his obviously-waxed chesticle region, the white dog against the black leather couch (every guido family on Long Island called circa 1989 and asked for their couch back). I CAN’T. I think she has finally lost it.

    • Charles Forman was her Jake Lodwick Lite says:

      But the throw pillows add such a nice touch.

      I think it’s hilarious when people’s apartments don’t jive at all with the image they present to the public. Those photos you linked to, JFA, were of this suave GQ-esque dude but clearly he’s just another wannabe actor living in Mom’s basement. Or some approximation thereof. Does it not look like somebody’s goddamn basement rec room?!?!

      • That room does have the look of ‘spare furniture strg’ …

      • Albie Quirky says:

        His parents live in Modesto (this took me 3 seconds to find out via WhitePages.com) but it does seem like he just moved the old rec room furniture into his kewl bachelor pad.

        WhitePages.com is the best resource for the super-lazy Nancy Drew or Hardy Boy.

        • Charles Forman was her Jake Lodwick Lite says:

          Damn, Albie! You’re a sleuth. Modesto, huh. I guess his family isn’t rolling in dough. Modesto is a festering shithole. Nothing distinguishes it from any given small town in Idaho. Modesto is one of those towns that you’re amazed exists on the west coast at all.

          • Charles Forman was her Jake Lodwick Lite says:

            Err, mentioning his family was kind of mean, but I meant only that this is no Jack McCain. No doubt Julia entertained delusions of marrying into an elite American family like every other girl who read too many Jackie Kennedy biographies.

          • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

            Heavens, the things one hears of people NOT in one’s social circle.

          • AFGHANI says:

            “Nothing distinguishes it from any given small town in Idaho. ”

            Except way more dangerous, much more property crime, and awful schools.

            “Modesto is one of those towns that you’re amazed exists on the west coast at all. ”

            Not really. Stockton, Sacramento, Chico, etc etc etc. Plenty of down-on-their-luck or never-had-luck places. There’s a reason CA has a budget crisis –it’s a very large state and more than 80% of the territory isn’t doing well economically and can’t compete in the modern global economy.

          • Charles Forman was her Jake Lodwick Lite says:

            Afghani, dude, people could say the same about Balitmore. I don’t have a lot of love for Sacramento or Chico and in fact fled California as soon as I could, but it’s not really fair to cluster them in with Modesto. Sacramento has over a million people, and even after the housing crisis, is still a nice place to live in many areas. Like any large suburban city, there’s plenty of shitty places, too. And Chico is a college town.

          • cakez says:

            Ahem. Step OFF the Capitol. Downtown/midtown/Land Park/The Fabulous 40’s/McKinley are all awesome areas with a lot of classic structures dating back to the 19th century. Chain businesses are rare, there are lots of galleries and shows, theater, community events and some seriously expensive real estate in the aforementioned regions (and not a tract home in sight). Not to mention it is “the city of trees” and we take our gardening very seriously. Like any other city, as you move outward things tend to suck more. Move in toward the Capitol and you can see the charm.

            Also, don’t you live in BALTIMORE? Like the murder capital of America?

          • cakez says:

            Also, Joan Didion grew up in Land Park.

          • Titanic Q-Tips (aka jane) says:

            I keep trying to get there, cakez, cause I’ve heard those things, but there’s a ring of boredom surrounding it that LITERALLY repels me.

          • mule on rouge says:

            Ontario sucks it pretty hard. I was shocked and so very disappointed when I arrived there to pitch a line of products to a grocery store chain. It was my first time in California.

          • Frequent Liar Miles says:

            Cakez: I loved “Run River.” And I have a total soft spot for California valley towns … for someone growing up on the coast, I loved visiting my husband’s (now ex) family in Stockton. Modesto, Merced, (and later Visalia; his dad was an exec in canning and growing and they moved around a lot) because it was always HOT; no fog to spoil the day. Anyway, nice place to visit (plus, OMG, the best food at family functions; the grandmas were all Italian immigrants. And they loved me because I was always clamoring for seconds. Good times.)

          • Little Orphan Lilly says:

            MODESTO. Oh my. Modesto was relatively near to where I grew up, which is why a poor guy I went to junior high with was known as “Molesto Ernesto who lives in Modesto.”

          • Distant cousin to our Chester the Molester, no doubt.

        • miss assvice says:

          I am waiting for him to Google her and he will slowly start backing away.

          • I think you just broke the code on Donkey’s attraction to this dude …

            Sucka’s garage apartment is entirely too cluttered for him to back up in.

            He might want to keep his condoms under lock & key, lest they mysteriously get pin-pricked in a reverse scheme-juice plot …

        • AFGHANI says:

          Your sleuthing is an underappreciated art, kind of like the perfectly loamy, low-pH soil that makes a nico blue hydrangea come into its own.

          • LEFOOLIEH says:

            No; she is Albie Drew and it’s TOTALLY appreciated… welcome, even. I love the insights and I’m sure I’m not the only one.

          • Albie Quirky says:

            I’m a little creeped out by my own sleuthing, actually, but the combo of having worked in fundraising and having been (being? going to be again once I am in better health?) a journalist means that I CAN’T STOP MYSELF. It’s like a reflex.

            At least I didn’t Zillow his parents’ house. That would have been going too far.

  19. Stinky Velour Couture says:

    How much do you wanna bet he’s working on a screen play?

    #feeling for the poor guy—

    Julie, just leave him alone and OFF your online world

  20. miss assvice says:

    These are not dates. If he was actually taking her out on a date then I would expect to see restaurants. theaters, bars, etc. This is working and a pity fuck so she lays the hell off of him. As far as the work part goes its a fucking tumblr blog. Its not having to do much CSS, html, ruby, python or anything major. She is basically paying for sex at this point and its pathetic. He could have a real job,making serious cash if he has real design skills. My bet is he will obo donkey soon and if he is smart leave her off his CV/Resume.

    • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

      “She is basically paying for sex at this point and its pathetic.”

      Yep.

  21. Every Little Thing She Does is Tragic says:

    Just wanted to say thanks again to all the lovely catladies and gents who contributed their awesome Boston recommendations on the last post (just in case you missed it over there ;). I now have a lot of great stuff on my to-do list, thanks to you guys! Looking forward to soaking up this fun city.

    • Worrisome Pelts says:

      Be sure to have a photography student do a kinderwhore shoot of you in an unsuspecting friend’s apartment. Nothing says Boston class like circulation-restricting blazers!

      (PS – I adore Boston. Have a blast, Bunny!)

  22. Princess WideStance says:

    Wow. This dude looks like he knooooows how good looking he is. And definitely enjoys having a yappy little animal hanging on his every word. Plus Lilly’s there too.

    • OMGPearskank says:

      He also looks kind of dumb and not very natural in either this “candid” or his “photo shoot” trying to evoke LA Noir in a cheap motel or whatever that was supposed to have been. So, I hope he’s not trying to get into acting because that might be a rather rude awakening.

    • Sake Bombardier says:

      Ha! For some reason I think Lilly is happy because he paid attention to her. Like, when you try to avoid a conversion with someone annoying by only talking to their pet.

  23. OT, but has Donkey created a new Vimeo channel?
    (newest two are snoozes of Shira’s bday party)

    Pardon me while I snout snark, but holy how fuck, the flares of her nostrils in this one really creep me out! It’s like they’re taking on a life of their own …

    http://vimeo.com/37291508

  24. Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

    I’ve visited this post twice and both times when I glanced at the photo I thought it was the character Nick from “New Girl.” Both times (because I cannot learn) what went through my mind was, “Dear lord, she did it. She infiltrated Zooey Deschanel’s life, except she only got as far as the stage set.” Then a couple seconds later I was like, “Oh.”

  25. Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

    Julia is now up to nearly 47,000 followers on Twitter – she is up 20,000 followers on Twitter in less than a weeks time.

    She credits this with Bravo announcing Miss Advised air date and her getting a publicist. Fun fact: In a weeks time, the Bravo Miss Advised Facebook has increased by 6 fans and Julia’s publicists have gotten her zero publicity.

    Miss Advised #ad

    • Ha! Julia Allison Baugher bought more than 20,000+ Twitter followers & no one believes otherwise, which begs the question: WHO DOES THAT? Besides deceitful fame ho’s? No one.

      No two brays about it, Desperate Donkey is D.E.S.P.E.R.A.T.E.

      Miss Advised #ad Miss ASSvice #ad Miss Despised #ad Miss Thundercunt #ad Miss Willmette #ad Miss Kenilworth Power Mom DeBallage #ad Miss 4Ever Alone #ad Miss I WAS INSIDE! #ad Miss Throw Your Own Mom Under the Bus #ad Miss Outcall #ad Hissing Weasels #ad Scheme Juice #ad

    • Albie Quirky says:

      And you know those folks in Uzbekistan are going to be watching the fuck out of “Miss Advised”, too.

  26. JuliaCleaver says:

    Lets start a new Julia trend,

    hey Jules we do not believe you as the pretend date is not licking or kissing Lilly’s face..please try again..

  27. bitchface says:

    he’s giving me a Bill Rancic vibe
    [img]http://www.superbowldallas.org/images/charityAmb_bill-rancic.jpg[/img]

    • bitchface says:

      or if Bill Rancic had a baby with Scott Disick
      [img]http://images.starpulse.com/pictures/2010/08/11/previews/Scott%20Disick-MVN-001310.jpg[/img]

      • Sake Bombardier says:

        That.

      • AFGHANI says:

        I wouldn’t go as pink or have the shirt that open, but that is more or less what I look like. Maybe I missed my calling dating a loud abrasive desperado Donkey?

        • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

          Well I’m not sure. But if you actually look like the fool pictured above, perhaps you should come over to my place and we can discuss it. I’ll mix us a couple of dirty vodka martinis (are blue-cheese-stuffed olives you or non-you?) and we’ll talk. Then you can snort cocaine off my clavicles while I chain-smoke Marlborough 100s and THE REMAINDER OF THIS POST HAS BEEN SUPPRESSED BY THE SOCIETY FOR QUOTING VICTORIAN NOVELS

      • mcakez says:

        I have never heard of this man until now.

        Wikipedia lists his occupation as ‘man of conspicuous leisure.’

        That is the most awesome thing I’ve ever read. Also, should be added to Julia’s wiki. “Man of conspicuous leisure,” indeed.

    • diluted brain says:

      I dig Bill Rancic but it could be because I love his show with Guilianna. He’s a sweetie.

  28. Google Keyword Miss Advised says:

    Check out the Google results for ‘miss advised julia allison’, LOL.

  29. Stripper Shoes On an Outcall With a Gay Guy says:

    Well, I get a distinctly gay vibe from this guy. I got it with that first photo. And now, with his short unbuttoned, it becomes rilly rilly obvious. Dude is gay. I think he’s her beard. Or she, his.

  30. Cut. Don't use that. says:

    Donk has all the sex appeal of “the slow girl” who has to be kept indoors lest she give blowjobs to have the homeless men in small southern town in 1924.

    • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

      That was tragically lyrical and evocative and scarily true. Can’t “like” it enough.

    • KashMoney says:

      can’t stop LOLing, don’t know why the misspelling of “half” as “have” makes this even LULZier.

  31. The Final Rose says:

    Andy Cohen ‏@BravoAndy

    premieres this week! “@GGragazzo: @BravoAndy is there going to be a summer by Bravo commercial this year like last year?”

    • The Final Rose says:

      Also, I just checked and Amy Laurent has 300 Twitter followers and Emily Morse has a respectable 6,000. Bravo PR has only 43,000.

      Elissa Buchter of Bridge & Tunnel Communications is doing a hell of a job as Donkey’s publicist.

      • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

        I can’t decide if her purchasing 20,ooo Twitter followers (and I am sure MORE to come) is because she wants to look like a Bravo breakout star or b/c she is so desperate for money that she thinks the more followers she has + the more Cheesy Skillets she does ads for = the more .60 cents a click in her pocket.

        Miss Advised (ad)

  32. Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:
    • Andy Whorehol says:

      Good God she’s cheesy. Stuff that ass into a sausage dress, flash them bingo wings, pin those pelts back, cross those hamhock legs and rock that signature fake smile then, gurl. Vanna White ain’t got shit on her!

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      wtf? is that new?

    • Can you post that here? For some reason, I am never able to see her FB page, signed in or not.

      • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

        I’ll try but if I do it wrong, can someone else attach?[img]http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=706691208005&set=t.1402715&type=3&permPage=1[/img]

        • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

          [img]http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?[img]fbid=706691208005&set=t.1402715&type=3&permPage=1[img][/img]

  33. Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

    I just watched the episode of Summer Heights High where Ja’mie wants to be the first 11th year to date a 7th year and chooses a hot and tiny little person who is afraid of her, then steals his phone to make sure he isn’t cheating on her. It was quite splendid.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      I LOVE Summer Heights High.

      Have you watched Angry Boys yet?

      • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

        I have not, but will add to list. Like a couple other people I’m experiencing some health challenges and for the first time in my adult life I’m saying to my family and friends, “Y’all, I’m taking a break.” Today is really the first day I’ve bowed out of all the normal things I do (the farmer’s market, the fish market — we’re not too far from the coast — the weekly run for raw milk and fresh beef from the dairy, yard work, a wide variety of child-based activities) and done nothing but sit in my study. I’m in my study and NOT working, not even doing research for work. I’m just sitting here waiting to feel better. Will take any recommendations for movies/series/books.

        • I’m sorry to read that you’re having trouble, Handbag — hope it resolves ASAP! Best wishes to ya. 🙂

        • Malformed Face (like a blow-up doll left in a hot car) says:

          handbag, sending you lots of love and good healing vibes xoxoxo

        • fig says:

          If you appreciate the obscure, here is a German TV series about a German-Turkish patchwork family told from the perspective of the overly verbal and sassy and also super obnoxious teenage daughter. And it’s significant and recommendation worthy to me because it used to be the favorite show of my dad who seemed the least likely to appreciate either an overly verbal or the teenage girl perspective.
          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ax8OuPrYmyk

          Feel better soon!

        • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

          Two documentaries enjoyed recently —

          End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlfo59Qfcs4

          and an older film, When We Were Kings http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DH_dkNa9Hag

          Feel better soon!

        • Fashion Girl says:

          Hey Handbag. I was thinking about you all week, because I finally got around to reading “The Marriage Plot”. I know you hate-hate-hated it, but I really liked it. Oh, Jeffy E., you divisive cut-up, you.

          So, I took a personal “I’m going to fucking kill all of you if I don’t get away from this office for one goddam day” day yesterday, and I watched “Tiny Furniture”. I feel like I get why people are fascinated by Lena Dunham now, even if I still have no desire to watch “Girls”. I think it’s worth a watch, even if it’s just to decide that you never want to hear anything from her ever again.

          Feel better. I hate getting expired and having health stuff. x

          • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

            I’ve been watching Girls, but maybe for slightly perverse reasons? I’m interested in Tiny Furniture, but can one go backwards? Watch the film after the series (I hear they’re similar). I understand why people are interested in her, too. As far as expiring and hating it, oh my god yes. This particular problem seemed to be a general-coming-apart at the seams, which was bad enough, and now it’s looking a bit scarier; thus, the entire day off.

            A German series and documentaries are both exactly what I love, thank you. My Man Handbag is also bringing me home the sequel to Hilary Mantel’s Wolf Hall, which I cannot WAIT to read.

          • Birthday chicken says:

            I liked Tiny Furniture. I saw it last year and looked up Dunham and realized she was doing a show for HBO. I like Jemima Kirke the most. I love when she slaps Dunham because she’s excited to see her. I was just so surprised by it I got a case of the giggles.

          • Fashion Girl says:

            Oh my God I LOVED “Wolf Hall”. I stayed awake all night on a flight from New York to Paris reading it. Thank you for reminding me that the sequel is upon us.

            I am pondering the, “Can one go backwards from ‘Girls’ to ‘Tiny Furniture’?” question. I would venture to say yes, because Laurie Simmons is just so fantastic as Lena’s (real life and fictional) mother. Lena is arguably the dullest part of the movie.

          • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

            Fashion Girl, the sequel is called Bring Up The Bodies. When I told my 15-year-old son the title he immediately inscribed it on his arm in Sharpie, because it’s going to be his next band name, now that Your Stolen Record Collection is defunct.

          • Fashion Girl says:

            I know someone who firmly believes that tagging “UK” on to the end of any band name automatically makes it cooler. So: “Bringing Up the Bodies UK”. Your son can send my royalty checks to “Fashion Girl, c/o North-Facing Luxury-Calked Windowed Apartment Building, Williamsburg, Brooklyn”. (UK)

          • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

            @Fashion Girl: Because I am an Olde (but am a man and therefore shan’t expire, ever!) I remember when George Michael’s duo was briefly known as Wham!UK before they broke out in the US, c. 1983. There was a particularly pretentious and grotesquely fashiony girl in my art class in HS- sort of a Julia- who grandly declared her cutting edge tastes by saying she liked, “Wham! Ook”.

            ” Oh, do you mean Wham! Yoo-Kay?” I replied, and she turned crimson. I’m laughing now because she was a bitch.

            Both “Girls” and “Tiny Furniture” are worth a look, I think- I am digging the series, though parts of it make me cringe. Bad ugly sex and painful recognition of youthful dumb, with some laughs. “You couldn’t pay me to be 24 again” says the gyno in ep. 2. Agree! But Lena Dunham really is bright and talented, I think. A lot of people resent her (privilege, etc.) but she’s really.. something. And I’m slightly in love with Jemima Kirke. Or, her character, which is supposedly not that different from her own. A lot of people dislike her (character’s) sort of wantonness and semi-aristo irresponsibility. But I sort of dig it.

            /blather

          • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

            Norse, Mr. Handbag hasn’t been watching “Girls” with me, but after each episode I walk around stunned from the terrible sex. Oh, it’s so ghastly. After the last episode (which was the worst in that way, I thought) he asked if I found it realistic and I was so happy to say I didn’t know, I can’t remember, I don’t want to talk about it, my daughters are turning 28 this fall and if they endured such nonsense??

        • Barking Mad says:

          Handbag, some news about our man Leonard.

          http://www.canadacouncil.ca/news/releases/2011/as129812444337295110.htm

          A class act. I also met him once, but did not go down to his place by the river.

          • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

            Whew, this is a good story. I saw the link and thought, “If he died, AFTER GOD TOOK JOHNNY CASH?” and what followed was a bunch of falling-on-my-knees curses, but okay, don’t worry. He’s OKAY.

          • Barking Mad says:

            Oh Handbag, I’m sorry! But I would never be so detached or so cruel.

            I hope you have recovered from the scare and the rest of your ills will follow.

        • DirtyLakeMichigan says:

          Sorry to hear this Handbag. Feel better soon.

        • Jane says:

          I liked In The Loop.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          Grr! I am sorry you’re not feeling well, sweet one. I was going to suggest Bring Up the Bodies but I see Mr. Handbag is obtaining it for you. I really liked The Snow Child by Eowyn Ivey, if you’re looking for delicate magic realism set in 1920s Alaska. I’m just now finishing the new biography of Wallis, Duchess of Windsor, and it’s extremely good; the biographer had access to some formerly classified documents so there’s some brand-new information in it as well.

          On the TV front, I wonder if you ever saw Slings and Arrows, the Canadian series from a few years ago? It’s a comedy (with serious bits) about the staff of a summer theater festival. Marvelous acting.

        • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

          I’m sorry to hear this.

          In keeping with my Victorian novels theme, may I reccomend Barchester Towers? It is not the first of the Barchester series by Anthony Trollope, but it is arguably the funniest and working out the knotty social problems of Post-Regency and nascent Industrial England is a little like a more subtle and ironic Dickens as ghost-written by Roger Altman.

          Speaking of which, if you have not seen Gosford Park, it is, in my opinion, Altman’s greatest movie and one that holds up to literally dozens of repeat viewings.

          I remember a glorious RSS production of The Adventures of Nicholas Nickelby, which may be available on DVD.

          • Ex Spurt says:

            Elbowing myself into your recommendation, RRR. Escaping the garage (we don’t have basements where I live) and going on a two month vacation to UK and France next week (lucky me!). While on holiday I usually try to read books set in the country I’m visiting. I had France and Scotland sorted but England was missing, but thanks to you, Kindle and Anthony Trollope, I’m now sorted!

            Handbag, I hope you’re feeling better soon. God, I loved Wolf Hall. I’m sure you’ve probably already read A.S. Byatt’s The Children’s Book, but if you haven’t, and you’re laid up for some time, I loved it (especially the sleazy D.H. Lawrence character).

        • [REDACTED]'s mom says:

          So sorry to hear that, Handbag. I hope this is something that will pass quickly, but if it does end up taking you down for a bit, I have some advice for you, based on my four-weeks-and-counting recovery from surgery: Books are great but when you’re in some serious discomfort (say, 4 or higher on the 0 – 10 pain scale) you won’t want to read, it’s too demanding.

          Netflix and an iPod were a godsend for me, because I was able to lay in bed and watch/zone out. I guess a laptop would work, too, though it’s not as easy to position comfortably.

          I know you may not have access to those things, and I sure hope it doesn’t come to that for you, but there’s my tip, in case.

          • iblow4shoes (formerly sad lilly) says:

            I did the same thing while recovering from surgeries. I couldn’t sit, so I watched Netfix on my iPad in the kitchen.

          • RE: the positioning issue of a bulky laptop (when maneuvering around in pain throws the quintessential monkey wrench): that’s precisely why I bought the < 15 oz Kindle Fire & keep it well w/in reach of the bed — it sure staves off boredom when you're awake but immobile while the rest of the house sleeps.

        • Dr. Gary says:

          Sending you cat lady love.

          xoxoxoxo

        • Get a Styl....Oh, I Give Up says:

          Peep Show if you’re into British comedies. Red Riding if you want to be depressed. Veg out and Netflix it up.

      • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

        Ja’mie is a fucking scream. Love her.

        Wasn’t that keen on Angry Boys, alas. But the guy is super-talented and funny.

        • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

          Also, glad you are taking a personal day for yourself, Handbag, you deserve it and I hope it’s enjoyable. XO bunny! 🙂

        • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

          And thanks everyone for all of the recommendations. I adore Trollope, adore Gosford Park, ditto The Children’s Book. Will definitely look for the magical realism recommendation, Albie. You’re all such kind and erudite haters and black-hearted bitches; I have a little tear.

  34. SOME “MISS ADVISED” EPISODE INFO:

    Monday, June 18 on Bravo (10-11 p.m. ET)
    Donkey feedbag & psycho visit date
    fauxtoed L-R Keith Pollock – Donkey
    episode 101

    Monday, July 9 on Bravo (10-11 p.m. ET)
    Donkey whoresback riding & whiny date
    fautoed T-B Donkey – Equine Cousin
    episode 104

    SORES (Oh hai, MareMare!)

  35. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    Thinking of the thousands of bots that Julia bought to ‘follow’ her on Twitter and how impressed the machines must be with her bare-chested web developer, I’m reminded of this old AI Koan:

    A disciple of another sect once came to Drescher as he was eating his morning meal.

    “I would like to give you this personality test”, said the outsider, “because I want you to be happy.”

    Drescher took the paper that was offered him and put it into the toaster, saying: “I wish the toaster to be happy, too.”

    • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

      I hope you were wearing your MIT hat when you posted this.

    • Grammarian says:

      AI koans

      Tom Knight and the Lisp Machine

      A novice was trying to fix a broken Lisp machine by turning the power off and on.

      Knight, seeing what the student was doing, spoke sternly: “You cannot fix a machine by just power-cycling it with no understanding of what is going wrong.”

      Knight turned the machine off and on.

      The machine worked.
      Moon instructs a student

      One day a student came to Moon and said: “I understand how to make a better garbage collector. We must keep a reference count of the pointers to each cons.”

      Moon patiently told the student the following story:

      “One day a student came to Moon and said: ‘I understand how to make a better garbage collector…

      [Ed. note: Pure reference-count garbage collectors have problems with circular structures that point to themselves.]
      Sussman attains enlightenment

      In the days when Sussman was a novice, Minsky once came to him as he sat hacking at the PDP-6.

      “What are you doing?”, asked Minsky.

      “I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe” Sussman replied.

      “Why is the net wired randomly?”, asked Minsky.

      “I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play”, Sussman said.

      Minsky then shut his eyes.

      “Why do you close your eyes?”, Sussman asked his teacher.

      “So that the room will be empty.”

      At that moment, Sussman was enlightened.

  36. KashMoney says:

    [img]http://i46.tinypic.com/ie2p21.jpg[/img]

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Where on earth did she wear this sequined black get up in LA? In what appears to be the middle of the afternoon? As per usual, she makes me itch.

    • ShesJustStupid says:

      Just one more thing here…is this the face that every guy sees when Donks smiles? Because all I see here is that VERY square shin and those puffly cheeks and, most importantly, no eyes. This is beyond “squinting like Cindy for Pancakes.” It’s disturbing. Fillers or bullimia, it’s…yuck.

      • Nicole says:

        A question. I live in LA. Well, an hour south. And I’m 42, and have no fashion sense whatsoever. But are those fingernails like, out of fashion? I mean, my nails looked like that when I was a 15 year old boarding school student in Wellesley. Thought I was elegant and timeless! But seriously, I see no other women who wear nails like that. And I can’t put my finger (aha!) on it. Maybe it’s the rounder nail shape? And don’t get me started on the ring. Looks like something my 12-year old daughter would wear.

        And a side note. Because of this site, I started wearing BB cream. It is AMAZING! I have never had skin that looked so good. So, Bravo catladies!!!!

    • Nicole says:

      Ok. I live in LA. Well, an hour south. And I’m 42, and have no fashion sense whatsoever. But are those fingernails like, out of fashion? I mean, my nails looked like that when I was a 15 year old boarding school student in Wellesley. Thought I was elegant and timeless! But seriously, I see no other women who wear nails like that. And I can’t put my finger (aha!) on it. Maybe it’s the rounder nail shape? And don’t get me started on the ring. Looks like something my 12-year old daughter would wear.

      • Little Orphan Lilly says:

        I’m 30 and nowhere near LA, but I’d DEFINITELY consider those nails out of fashion. At least among my friends/acquaintances, nails are shorter, especially if you’re wearing really dark or bright polish. I know a few girls who let their nails grow a little bit (and they tend to gently squared ends rather than those weird ovals), but they also usually wear fairly neutral polishes. My nails are virtually always red or a dark color and I keep them as short as I can.

        I may care a little too much about nail polish.

        • mule on rouge says:

          Her nails are usually almost stubs, aren’t they? I’ve always suspected she always wears (criminally unfashionable) polish to a) stop herself from gnawimg on them and b) to hide the dirt trapped under them. She is also a big fan of the press-on products, because she looooooves taking shortcuts.

  37. ShesJustStupid says:

    OK, first of all, should we be anticipating another hilarious photo shoot?

    Amanda Serfozo  ‏@moxielox
    Anyone know an #LA street artist who’d like to get their hands dirty on a photoshoot? @MOCAlosangeles @shanleyknox @gapingvoid @garancedore

    Retweeted by Julia Allison

    Secondly, for all the talk about his sockless photos, WHY is he wearing dress socks with a bare chest in the photo with this post? Is it cold? hot? Staged badly?

  38. JuliaCleaver says:

    Mark Z got married…another Tech Founder got away from Donkey’s clutches

  39. miss assvice says:

    Wow if she has a PR firm representing her she sure went cheap. http://www.bridgeandtunnelcomm.com/mobile/#mp4

    They represent hotornot.com and cougarlife.com. Maybe they can hook her up with Monica and Sarah’s hair extensions which they also represent and plow her with voo doo tequila for more sips. Wow, she picked a winner but more than likely the only company that would touch her.

  40. Redacted's Unworn Christmas Sweater says:

    OT, but I wonder if Randi made it back in time from the ladyparts conference she spoke at for her brothers’s wedding?

    • mule on rouge says:

      Not if he timed it right. You just know Old Yeller would insist on singing.

  41. So Blessed. says:

    As the dog returneth to its vomit, so does Jankles embrace her ButtPrint Cleanse. Because this show is obviously TAKING OFF beyond the -stans (20k foreign Twitter followers don’t lie) and one must be ready for certain destiny of appearances on all of the big teeveees. shews.

    All I can imagine are some embarrasing digestive issues by the eleventh date with Casually Unbuttoned to Navel Web Developer. Also–if is day 3–hmm–FOURTH OMG DATE was her slurping almond milk or lemon water then running to the toilet to expel “toxins?” Thexay! My experiences doing any types of cleanses or even changing my diet from Cheetos to chia seeds (not really) have resulted in unholy noises and actions from my body for the first few days.

    Then I morphed into a ragebeast and ate strange combinations of food and condiments. Is if I had pica. Cleanses and I do not agree-moderation and listening to my body seems to work.

    I also wanted to put a paw up and out for my catladies and catmen who are experiencing actual life events; the abundance of well-posited snark on the site is always balanced with bravery, honesty, and compassion. RBNS is an actual community brimming with interesting folks and my clogged little heart always warms that you all are quick to offer support and resources.

Comments are closed.