Bravo officially announces “Miss Advised.” Just watch:
UPDATE: Oh, my god, there is even a webpage.
UPDATE #2: It looks like Julia is already regretting her national reality television debut. Honey, we already told you beforehand that you would come across as a bloated Stay Puft Marshmallow Marm.
Also? That banner image? WOOF!
This is everything I hoped it would be and more.
Me, too. Oh, me me me me too.
Wow she looks like shit. “I’m looking for my husband. And I have a 73 point checklist.” Awful. Way to go, Donks.
She truly believes that kind of shit makes her seem cute and quirky.
It also conveniently doubles as a device for her narrative. “I had a 73 point checklist, but when I met “the one,” that all went out the window.” She’s already tried to employ that storyline before, it just fucking backfires on her every time she gets dumped.
But after the world sees this… who is going to want to take her on even a first date?
Exactly. If she couldn’t get a date before this, imagine how hard dating is going to become after she’s splashed all over cable TV as a real-life Cathy cartoon, braying, be-tutu’d lunatic. SHE WILL NEVER GET MARRIED.
I mean, the Wired “famous” days at least portrayed her as a “sexy get.” Here, she’s a full blown loon who seems not only unhinged but mental and desperate – man repellant.
Dad$er is going to have to fork over some verdant for the ultimate Donkistani ‘fan’, if ever Donkey is going to clomp down the aisle in this lifetime.
“Real Life Cathy Cartoon” is the perfect way to describe JA.
I’ve never been more excited for a Bravo show.
OMG me too! I am a basement loser and watch every single Bravo shit show. Donk being herself on one is a dream come true.
Yes this looks even worse than I hoped! I have already started preparing the popcorn and cheetos.
ME TOO! Oh my cats this is going to be good!
I’m so excited! I may just ignore Charter’s horrible service and order cable again just for this reason.
I’d rather eat ground glass than be forced to spend time with any of the raging NPDs populating these vomitous shows. That said, we’ll be tuning in to discover those 73 points.
Julia is NOT going to like this – Bravo working with Randi Zuckerberg: http://www.nbcuniversal.presscentre.com/Content/Detail.aspx?ReleaseID=9856&NewsAreaID=2&ClientID=5
I know CDB retired A-K kitty, but I wanted to offer humblest apologies now that I’ve caught up with the last thread. Please, CBD – don’t hurt me!
What? It’s compulsory to read and commit to memory every fucking detail on this website?
Fuck that. No apologies necessary.
This.
It’s cool, I posted that earlier this morning and then two new posts were put up so it’s not like you were REQUIRED TO KNOW.
Namaste
I doubt this is how she heard of it. Probably explains why they could not do their birthday thingy.
Is that what she meant when she referred to a “surprise” that changed their plans, while tweeting Shira Lazar? Hehehe.
Not to steal from Mcakez but I think i just came in my pants.
Also, JP and Jacy, I love you and wanted to express my appreciation for this place and all the awesome cat lay-dies before this place is run over with new cats as it surely will be.
Donkey, let your meltdown commence. Holy shit, yo!
HER FACE!!!!! It is jacked beyond all recognition!!!!! I can’t even see the video but damn… damn!!!!!
31 years old, ladies and gentlemen.
Don’t fuck with your face.
It’s truly frightening. Maybe if she stopped now her face would start to look better? Or has she gone too far?
Her face is stuck like that (barring any advancements in time travel)
I tried to freeze the video on this can couldn’t do it. Thanks for your service. She looks monstrous. NOW I get why she’s feeling “out of control.” This show is going to make her look terrible. Still not as terrible as she truly is, but certainly not the innocent victim of singlehood I’m sure she tried to portray.
I was going to do that too, & then I thought: ‘No, I’ve really got to eat lunch first, because this could seriously jack up my appetite!’
But you’ll be so skinny! It’s the Julia Allison Fright Fest Diet(TM) – guaranteed to scare five pounds right off!
And keep in mind – when they do the “interview” part of the show – they are given amazing lightening and a make-up person. And this is the BEST THEY COULD DO.
(Clutches pearls)
I blew up the video to full screen on my computer and it’s horrifying. I can’t imagine how bad she’s going to look in HD.
I know! Just think, many of those middle-aged housewives–who have gone through marriages, divorces, childbirth, many rounds of plastic surgery, and addiction–still manage to look better than her.
Did she get another nose job? Looks different.
What the fuck happened to her eyes? Her eyelids are huuuuge. Even with a thick line of eyeliner on the top, there is still a huge amount of visible eyelid. And the area under her eyes has been filled in so much, it looks completely unnatural. Even young people have visible eye sockets under the eye.
If she thinks she looks good like this, she is so completely demented.
I think that Donkey is wearing some verrrrry long & curved long eyelashes right there … & from her view, it was probably like looking out through the bars of a jail cell.
#Sign_of_things_to_come?
Forgive my re-re, but filler is injected under the eye? Beyond how it squicks me to think of it, I thought people got stuff sucked out from there?
From further down the list of new Bravo shows:
LA Shrinks(working title)
Produced by Intuitive Entertainment with Kevin Dill and Mechelle Collins serving as Executive Producers along with Elise Duran as Co-Executive Producer.
It takes one to treat one! The professional and personal lives of dynamic experts are exposed as they counsel a wide array of clients at some of the top private practices in Los Angeles.
Excellent crossover potential for MissAdvised’s breakdown (as opposed to breakout) star, Julia Albertson. Synergy, Bravo! It’s all about synergy!
Synergy, Surgery, Bravo! It’s all aboutsynergysurgery!Nicccccccccccccccccccce!
or should I say Slice?
What the hell kind of shrink signs up for this? And what kind of patients are actually going to sign the waiver to be televised at such a vulnerable time? This is disgusting.
Can someone post a link to that trailer? My iPhone can’t view the embed.
Jesus, it’s all about you, isn’t it?
huh? i was dying to watch the video and not near my computer. I really am sorry if you took offense, I didn’t mean it.
Now that I’ve seen the video, wow!
I was joking.
Whew! I was worried I’d pissed off my daddy.
Download the Puffin app. It’s a browser that lets you view flash videos on your iOS devices. I just used it to watch the bravo video and am kind of upset it worked, cos that was AWFUL.
40-42 minutes per show, split up amongst the three women, means 13-14 minutes of braying per week.
What a colossal shitshow this is going to be. And she signed up for it! Imagine you’re Dad & Momsers having to watch this. “Our daughter Julia, the spinster…”
A friend who works for CBS once told me that half hour shows are 22 minutes & hour-long shows are 44 minutes, but maybe that’s not an industry standard? Anyhoo, I hope it is, just because that’d make it damn near 15 minutes of braying per episode (since I’m going to cave & get cable tv, which I haven’t had since sometime back in the 20th century, for reals).
Cable shows are a little shorter, because more ads. Also, intro and credits/outro eat up some of the time.
Still THERE’LL BE PLENTY OF BRAY FOR EVERYONE.
Don’t forget… they don’t necessarily split time equally. They show more of what they think the audience wants to see. Expect 50% of the air time to be bray-cray.
I’m sure you could stream it illegally instead of paying the hefty cable bill! one of the best sites is http://www.1channel.ch/
Oh honey. Your face.
Also, my security words were “over the hill” and “nest egg.” LOLZ.
Holy fuck her face!!!!! How can I watch the video? Can’t see it on my iPhone and when I check the link, it says video is not there.
Ugh!!!!
I can’t watch on iPad either,
.
Hahaha serious bizzness lady face, check.
Looking at the picture, I think her business lady role model is Daisy Duck.
She’s trying to avoid the double chin and instead looks like an idiot.
Puh-leeze let that be a moment where Bravo / Miss Advised caught Donkey [1] googling herself, & [2] following the links to RBD to faithfully (Never. Reads. Here.) totally read her snark site.
I want screamgrabs of RebloggingDonk.com to be televised on Miss Advised, dammit!
She looks like an actual chipmunk. This would be cute if she were a child.
Maybe that’s why her behavior is childlike. Large scale roleplaying?
Cameron Silver, co-owner of Decades, is a lovely guy. I’m excited for that show, and to see if he hears anything about JAB from Bravo execs that he can pass along. I’m sure their paths will cross during up-fronts or whatever.
If you think all these screen caps are bad, SHUDDER IN HORROR IMAGINING THAT MUG BLOWN UP ON YOUR 60-INCH HDTV!!!
I want to watch this so badly, but my husband and I usually watch TV together in the evenings and I am terrified to expose him the braying, freaky mug of Le Donk.
It was horrifying on my 27″ in computer monitor.
Mine too! I watched in full screen for a few seconds and had to go back to watching the teeny tiny embedded video – it was horrifying.
Can someone do a screen grab of the moment toward the end of the video where, for a brief moment, she’s sitting in a pile of pink poufy dresses and absolutely looks like she’s just taken a hit off a Betsey Johnson crack pipe?
Bless you, good sir/ma’am.
Thanks! I was trying to get that one.
It’s really all about you, isn’t it.
In this place? It is.
Between the pelts and the dresses that is a lot of flammable material there.
Holy fucking yikes!!!! She looks 55! And that is not meant to insult 55 year olds. Jesus, Lawd!
Holy Trapezius muscle, Catman!
WHAT? Is going on there?
#HoofballerNeck
Hey eyebrows…why are they so pointy?
Thoughts from behind the lacquered donkey facade:
How much longer do I have to pretend to be listening before I can get back to talking about me? I have to share air time with two other bitches and dial-a-date here is cutting into a burro’s camera time.
Holy fuck, her dates were at the Terrace? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, oh lord, Donk, I’m so, so sorry.
For those who don’t know the neighborhood — the background of that picture is the parking lot at the end of Washington Blvd, between Marina del Bray and Venice. Fire up Google maps and you’ll see the lot, complete with the yellow gate in the background which closes late at night or when the lot is full. I can’t tell you how many times a bunch of us ran into those very palm trees getting back from the (far superior) Whaler across the street.
The Terrace is the quintessential pub on the north side of the end of the street; absolutely nothing special, the only thing going for it is the location. Ten bucks says that when this show airs, you’ll see random tourists wandering in the background, nearly getting creamed by people on their bikes.
(Luckily, the Terrace has no north-facing windows. So sorry, so fat.)
Does she have tattoos on each wrist? That tatoo doesn’t look like the Long Island Universty one? Could just be the screen shot.
that’s LIU, she only has that one, on the left wrist.
You rang?
It just looks like a bird pooped on her wrist now. Smeary tattoo is smeary.
Full face of spackle on a daytime date. Oh honey…
Glad to see Long Island University getting some screen time! Hope it increases their enrollments.
This is the moment in the video that really disturbed me. Her face just looks so calculated and I think she’s actually batting her eyelashes. Same thing with the video about zen digital nomad. She just seems SO inauthentic. I wish she would just be herself, if she knew who that was.
Also, 31 years old and still going on prom theme dates. On television. FUCKING CUCKOO.
Her parents are lucky they don’t have the good sense to be mortified by this loon. I mean, can you imagine?!
I imagine they will be completely embarrassed after this airs. It’s one thing to tell your powerful deballage mom friends about your “spirited” daughter and her non-traditional “career” path over lunch, quite another to have them witness the cray on TV for themselves. I can imagine Ma and Pa Baugher are going to be mortified.
I can imagine the Pettifogger$ quietly retiring to Florida mid-way through the 1st season of Miss Advised.
Which, if I may JFA myself here, also means that I already think that there’s potential for more than one season of Miss Advised …
Well we know Julia’s going to remain single long enough for them to film as many seasons as they’d like.
I know someone went to JA’s birthday party a couple years back and encountered Robin, who appeared to buy Julia’s stories about her glamorous, accomplished life… but there’s no way they can be happy about this. I see serious hairy times in the future for the Baugher clan.
And tell you what, Granny Moneybags is definitely of the type that believes a respectable woman appears in the paper only three times: at birth, marriage and and death.
or when they want to rant about those damn multiculturalists taking away freedom of speech.
She seemed to buy it. Upon reflection, maybe she was trying to convince others, and herself?
I do think they thought she’d hit a home run with PK, who came from a wealthy family and put up with her shit. After all, if he didn’t make a fuss (AT THE TIME) about nine fucking Baugher clan and JAB friends descending on his apt., and if he could make it through birthcray, surely JAB would be forced to seal the deal. Except he dumped her raft ass.
Ah, sweet memories.
I’m pretty sure that it was Dirty Lake Michigan who went … I was in chat that night when she (?) reported back, at least I’m thinking that …
(Wow, I haven’t been in the Donkey chat stable since right after the RBNS take-down)
No Brayella, not I. I’ve never seen the Bray-o-meister in the wild. Can’t recall who it was, but I’m thinking the person who reported didn’t /doesn’t comment much.
twas Pilot is the new Keynote.
Or when she’s writing a cranky letter complaining about the blacks and the browns not getting off her lawn.
Or when her husband is writing to some lunatic quack psychologist about how she tortures her children on Sunday mornings with loud church musics.
GMB MEDIA HIGHLIGHTS NEVER 4GET
Britt will die.
i mean of embarrassment
So all these shows will air on Bravo or online? I got confused with the “Powered by Bravo” angle. Or is that just their new thing?
Her family is going to be so embarrassed. I bet they don’t even tell anyone.
They won’t have to tell anyone. IT WILL BE EVERY WHERE! Their local paper and news programs will be all over this.
THERE IS NO ESCAPING DONKEY DAUGHTER!
I can’t wait for the ‘congratulatory’ write-up powered by TMS.
http://www.bravotv.com/miss-advised
For all the catpeople to bookmark: The Miss Advised page with Donkey’s bio and a killer cast photo. Video located here too.
Bravo’s photo shop magic can’t even help the horrendous legs and piggy toes crammed into too-tight heels.
HER CHIN IS ENORMOUS.
SO ARE HER FINGERS.
AND CALVES.
AND KNEES.
AND TOES.
(knees and toes)
A veritable hockey puck.
its not a chin its a witherspoon!
I look shitty
Oh so shitty
So shitty and gritty and fey …
*ahem*
I’ll always ring you, IASID!
Over 1000 tv appearances. ORLY?
That’s almost one appearance per day over the course of three years.
Nice job, Bravo. I mean BRAVO. You’ve been lied to like countless other people and organizations.
Yeah seriously. She did 300 appearances in 2007 and 2008 as a whole and made up all the rest. Show me 1000 spots, Donkey.
Does lying about this make her more pathetic? All of those appearances and she couldn’t get a job or book deal out of it?
I think Donkey counted each frame as a separate appearance.
RBD is the 3rd Google result for “Miss Advised.” Awesome.
http://www.bravotv.com/miss-advised/season-1
She looks older than most of the Bravo housewives.
Let’s make it #1 by mentioning Miss Advised in every. single. comment.
#DonkeyTV
Clean out the basement, cat ladies. It’s about to get a whole lot more crowded up in hurrrr.
Moppin’ up!
hahaha that’s my new fav gif EVAH
That cat’s all:
“Must. hurry. the Donkey Brays at midnight!”
That is awesome!
That makes me laugh.
Hey! How did your cat get my bra? That is INAPPROPRIATE Some Girl!
Am I the only one who is a little sad about this place getting overrun? What if they drink all the Franzia and smash Cheetos into the carpets?
Potentially overrun, that is.
This is absolutely her zenith, AND IT MAY VERY WELL BE MINE.
Mine too, I’ll confess right now.
Also, mine, if that’s okay.
This is a dish best shared, for sure.
We’re all in this together.
It is a magnificent moment, isn’t it? Our collective secret knowledge is about to be shared with (presumably) thousands of other people. WELCOME, WORLD, TO THE TERRIBLE MAJESTY OF THE BRAY AND THE CRAY!
updated site tagline (see top of page). thanks albie!
and she just jizzed in her pants..
So now you know what I’ve been filming for the past six months … A BRAVO show: http://t.co/HA1qWAo5
My first impression is that wow, they gave a lot more screentime to Donks during that promo than the other women… Or was I just focused on her parts?
Never, ever focus on her parts.
If you’re Bravo, who do you give more airtime to: the good looking, reasonable, driven women who have some difficulty finding a good relationship, or Complete Prom Dress Lunatic Overdrive? She was made for this.
How many years has she been waiting, scheme juices boiling away, to tweet that? A BRAVO show – ALLLL CAPPPPSSS!!!!!1!!!!!!11!!! This is the high point of her life. Sad.
I know she is a Donkey so I am probably wrong, but there has to be some trepidation… after seeing that promo that the shit is going to hit the fan? No? Maybe not.
She thinks she looks adorable in the promo, make no mistake.
absofuckinglutely. She is in heaven right now. Of course we all know that there cometh a fall….
You’re right, I mean, look at how she has mangled her face – she has no self-perception whatsoever.
She thinks everyone will love her because she is SO NICE!
I saw enough of Emily Morse to know that she’s a cranky little bitch.
Don’t argue; everyone’s wrong but me.
What do you think after this?
http://vimeo.com/5583568
You have to admit though. She looks great for being 41 (really)!
http://www.ongo.com/v/2036728/-1/596580054272C474/nothings-off-limits-to-sexologist-emily-morse
She definitely does not look 41. Also, her voice is very girlish… almost teenagerish.
How soon will a Donkey be saying that she is “playing a character” on this show? 3, 2, 1…
She announced the show on her Twatter…
I don’t think her draconian contract would allow such a thing. right, media catpeople?
I am trying to understand why, despite the spackle, does her skin tone make her look like she has jaundice, but you know, fat.
“Julia Allison is a columnist, television personality, Internet entrepreneur, public speaker, and unabashed social media junkie. A media and relationship expert, Allison has made over 1,000 television appearances on every major network…”
WTF, how can she lie like this?!
Also, I think she kisses a black guy in the cheek in that video. You can tell she just wanted to get her corn and go home. HATE.
I don’t think he’s her type…
Too ethnic, right?
I was thinking too gay.
Probably too TaskRabbit …
Oh, he’s my type, despite the uggums argyle sweater. Mmmmwrawwwr.
uhm I think they meant “heterosexual”.
upvote for corn. NEVER FORGET
Let her lie for now… she’s going to get called out for it. This is why she has feelings of losing control because once all her lies are out there – she’s fucked.
Here’s what she says on her facebook:
So, what I’ve been filming for the past six months – a new show to debut this fall on BRAVO. It was an … interesting experience. To say the least.
TRANSBRAYTION: If I come off looking bad IT IS NOT MY FAULT. It’s the editing. They made me look that way! I am a nice person! Okay… um… how about this… I was creating a character! I was making good TV!
I love how “transbraytion” has stuck.
She knows she comes off HORRIBLY. I can’t fucking wait for this shit!
“It was an … interesting experience. To say the least.” was this part Tweleted? The tweet I see about it now only links to at story announcing the lineup.
Oh dumb donkey, already trying to do damage control and it hasn’t even aired yet.
It’s not a tweet. It’s her facebook status.
Oh DURRR.
Interesting how these “announcements” went up on her Facebook and Twitter about five minutes after it was posted here first.
These shows all look try-hard and terrible. And I say that as someone who enjoys way too much crap Bravo tv.
They all look like a brand new level of trashy and fake. As Jack The Bulldog said up above, “vomitous.” Julia Allison’s lifelong dream to be seen by millions as the tacky, stupid skank she is has finally come true.
Bravo (sorry, BRAVO) seems to be heading in an ever-trashier direction, if that’s possible. Even more un-likeable people. (Shahs of Sunset, anyone?) Was saying to my mom that someday we’ll say, “You know, those early “Housewives” shows were actually pretty classy.”
The moment she spanks her be-Spanxed ass is something else.
Also, her room is Hoaders-level filthy. I guess a task bunny couldn’t come over in time to clean up before filming?
Look at her face in that photo – and I’m only on a 13 inch screen – it looks like it’s sagging.
She’s Lara Flynn Boyle, Part II
http://www.buzzfeed.com/gavon/lara-flynn-boyles-face-through-the-years
Wow!!! She should have just stopped whatever she was doing in 2004.
Her encephalitic bobble-head noggin is so very out of proportion to her not-skinny body.
It’s pretty obvious that bed hasn’t been seeing any action …
Ick! Donkey! Clean your room. That bed does not look like it’s had your infamous lint roller over it.
That dress is way too tight- even for a herve leger. Size up, donkey, size up!
So apparently Lewis Howes went on a date with Amy Laurent and show walked out on him. Amazeballs.
It looks like Bravo/Blondie/RR is going to let the craycray be seen, possibly even editing to pack in as much as possible. LOVE it.
I THOUGHT that looked like Lewis Howes! Was it!?
Yes.
Her friends are so excited, including Caroline McCarthy.
Sasha Haines-Stiles excited to see it
11 minutes ago · Like
Katherine Ashworth Brandt Congrats!
11 minutes ago · Like
Stephen Charles McArthur Can’t wait. I’ll be watching!
10 minutes ago · Like · 1
Mike Tallent A lot of hard work!
10 minutes ago · Like
Mike Tallent What did you learn about yourself Julia? When life pushes you in new directions you grow.
6 minutes ago · Like
Christopher McArthur Can’t wait!
4 minutes ago · Like
Caroline McCarthy Congrats!
54 seconds ago · Like
Caro is a Donkey worshiper from way back.
I think we can all agree this show looks amazing
What does that mean?
‘Startlingly astonishing’, of course.
(to put it ‘nicely’)
Pick a lane, Caro.
Thank you. You can’t have it both ways – giving seal claps to a Donkey on her FB page and then coming here to say the show is going to be amazing. Amazing like a train wreck or amazing be/c your just so proud of your friend?
Or is Caro trying to get hits on her blog? Confused by her presence here.
you’re
Oh, amazing like a train wreck. I sure hope anyone getting involved in a Bravo reality show is aware that it’ll come across like this. If they’re smart, they will be able to pull a Bethenny Frankel and take the reins, image-wise. (Most aren’t.)
But am I happy for her? Yeah. She’s always wanted to be a “personality,” and this is kind of the pinnacle of that. It’s never a motivation I’ve fully understood, but hey, she got a Bravo show, good for her. And the trailer was hysterical.
That said I am a mild misanthrope who loves to laugh at silly conventions of dating culture so perhaps I find it funnier as a result.
Caro, if you had known how boy (or batshit) crazy she was before seeing the trailer, would you still have set her up with Greasy?
Oh come on, Caroline. You say you’re happy for your “friend” yet always happen to pop up minutes after every time you’re mentioned on a snark blog dedicated to calling her fat and making fun of her fucked up face. Seriously. Pick a lane. Or just lurk without feeling the need to announce your presence.
I don’t know. I think it’s possible for Caro to be happy for her acquaintance but also post on this website when she’s mentioned. If I were being called a Donkey worshipper on a website, I’d probably respond to…
@anon: Didn’t intend to set anybody up and never would’ve thought she and Taylor would hit it off, actually. Introduced her to a handful of people in a party context.
@shamoolia: Sometimes I think it makes sense to chime in (don’t mean to draw attention to myself!! sorry!!) I do lurk. RBD fascinates me (anonymous communities tend to). Some of you all are hilarious, and yes, there are definitely things Julia does which which I disagree on varying levels (i’ll leave it at that). The body snark goes too far for my tastes though
Caroline–why is she your friend? What is likeable about her? The letters she sends to ex’s fiancees? Telling the world she was “inside” when her mom got raped? The outright lying? The bragging? The mental illness? Is she in some way a fun person to be around? Because I worked with one of her ex friends who was an ex because Julia trashed her on that dumb AM radio show. They used to be good friends. What, exactly, do you get out of the association?
OMG, is Google buying reblogging donk?? Say it ain’t so!
I am glad to see Caro here and welcome her perspective. It bugs to see our commenters nag and nag and nag her about her association with Donkey. She can feel how she wants, and she’s been gracious every time she comes here.
I think she has. And its ours.
If that’s true, then she probably shouldn’t be faking friendship and unnecessarily interacting with her. Anyone who knows Julia understands that she only sees that kind of stuff as positive reinforcement, regardless of the reasoning behind it. I agree with Malformed Face, above.
::shrug::
Donkey reads here nevery day; it’s not like she isn’t aware that OMG!Bears! posts here too.
It seems pretty obvious to me that OMG!Bears! is amused by Donkey, but also a kind soul, & the only thing keeping Donkey from knowing where she stands w/ people is Donkey’s ongoing delusion.
Meh, I do the same thing IRL. I know what lane I’m in when I comment on an overly obnoxious facebook humblebrag with a “WOW!!!! You’re AMAZING!!” I also know what lane all the people who ‘like’ my comment are in. It’s harmless really. I think I see it the same way Charles Forman was sees it.
I feel like with the ever-watchful eyeOfDonk upon this site, caro could never come right out and say it, so I will.
If you ran in the same circles as the donk (or any sociopath) and being around her was unavoidable, would you want them to feel you were their enemy?
Julia is fucking unhinged. She is unapologetic about stalking people she obsesses on and will trade in her own mother’s privacy for nothing. She stole a BFF’s wedding tiara for christ’s sake! You don’t want her thinking about YOU at 3am during one of her little manic scheme binges. Caro is being political. Don’t mistake that for endorsement. There’s a reason most people on this site don’t use their real name.
Well said, & I bet OMG!Bears! head is bobbing up & down in agreement as she reads this.
Then just don’t say anything like most of her “friends.” No need to congratulate her on FB.
I believe Caro when she says she enjoys the funny stuff on RBD…but at the same time, she obviously has a strong and genuine affection for Julia. I will never be able to understand how any decent person (which I know Caro is) can have such positive feelings towards a serial liar and all-around awful person like Donkey.
I could hit the ‘like’ button many times from this ks. That’s the reality of dealing w/ people like JAB.
Evelyn Rusli @EvelynRusli · Open
the horror. the horror. silicon valley is having its real housewives moment http://allthingsd.com/20120404/maybe-youre-going-to-have-to-pay-for-cable-after-all-silicon-valley/
22m
Ryan Lawler @ryanlawler · Open
@EvelynRusli @nickbilton @pkafka I have a feeling this will end in tears.
Caroline McCarthy @caro Close
@ryanlawler @EvelynRusli @nickbilton @pkafka I speculate Bravo deal with @taskrabbit (annc’d around SXSW) has something to do with the show.
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1:20 PM – 4 Apr 12 via TweetDeck · Details
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My hunch was incorrect! I figured the Taskrabbit partnership must have had something to do with that “Silicon Valley” show that just got announced, but a guy who works there has said that it doesn’t.
On that note, I have no idea how Bravo will make Silicon Valley tech culture camera-worthy. I don’t think Randi Z. would get involved if she didn’t think it stood a chance at success, but having spent a decent amount of time in the area, I’m willing to surmise that even the people who *try* to be reality-show types in Silicon Valley would still make viewers fall asleep.
in fact, Caro, i think we already established here that the Bravo/TaskRabbit deal has to do with Miss Advised, especially given Julia’s copious use of their services in the past months, and shilling for them on her twitter.
Prof, no idea whether that’s true as well, but Taskrabbit’s PR guy indicated the partnership was specific to Watch What Happens Live: https://twitter.com/#!/JohnnyBrackett/status/187649648276672512
I think you’re hot caroline. I can over look you jab love.
“Amazing,” OMG Bears? No, it just looks like another Bravo shitshow. I couldn’t tell one from the other in the previews. Do you not get out much or have decided to kiss donkey ass again?
Bears is a cool chick, she’s clearly laughing at the Donk with us. Why must we hate on people who have differing views of how best to respond to Donkey’s fuckery?
Pay attention, Afghani. Caro often responds positively to Donkey’s stupid-ass tweets and offers encouragement and support because they’re friends.
Affberger’s, you know me; I never (seldom, anyway) agree w/ you, but I gotta give ya chops on: ‘Why must we hate on people who have differing. views of how best to respond to Donkey’s fuckery?’
Geez. Whatever this prevailing ‘feral cat mentality’ is (seems like GOMI toxins are bleeding over into RBD), I hope it’s short-lived.
Agreed!
Seconded! What do we care if OMGBears! is playing both sides of the fence? She’s Julia’s friend, not ours. She’s given us interesting info before so I say we welcome anybody who wants to dish.
And also agree with Brayella. Have seen a real tendency lately for smearing other people with differing opinions in a GOMI way. I likes me some GOMI but, I get tired of hearing the party line that “everybody and every opinion is welcome” only to see those who have one run out of the place by the regulars.
Oops, should make that clear. That GOMI runs people out for having a differing opinion. Still think we are good bit more civilized over here and I hope it stays that way when all the newbies rush over in the wake of Miss Advised.
What Afghan said.
People to stop losing their shit every time Caro says something. Jesus, just let her talk and stop accosting her with questions like she’s a celebrity or something. It’s giving me canklehausen.
Oh Caro, piss off and go blog another photo of driftwood.
Dammit. I’m trying to find one on my Tumblr dashboard to reblog JUST FOR YOU. And there just aren’t any tonight. Oh cruel world.
LEAVE CARO ALONE!
What he said!
i decided to go to sleep, and all THIS (points upwards) happens! so much to catch up on, and it’s my birfday! so just in case you were thinking about it, i’m pre-empting any funny business by posting this:
Hippy Buttday!
Happy Birthday Prof!!
Happy Birthdonk Professor! No sleepy times for you, party in the basement!
She forgot to paint her nails cheeto orange.
happy birthday; pass the BirthdayChickenCake!!
Happy birthday, Prof, love you long time. Have a great one!
Just by the full-mouth belly braying at 1:54 (handle with care: may induce canklehausen) you can tell this is going to be a Major Trainwreck.
Pass the popcorn, Fluffy.
Can anyone with video grab software put this on Youtube? Not all catladies live in the USA and all I get is “The Content is Currently Unavailable”.
DITTO! HELP!
Yes, that would be super servicey!
Try HotSpot Shield
Aren’t Bravo’s RHO__ eventually featured on Hulu?
Hulu doesn’t work outside of the US.
I have friends outside the US who use HSS or Tunnelblick to watch Hulu & do some other things — it’s a matter of creating a VPN to connect to an OpenVPN — I really can’t explain it, though I somewhat understand it, so here is a C&P from Tunnelblick’s site:
VPNs are primarily used for three purposes (sometimes all three simultaneously):
* To securely connect a computer to the Internet, even though it may be connecting through an untrusted network (a wireless network at a hotel or airport, for example);
* To securely connect a computer to the Internet as if it were located somewhere else (connect a computer in the USA as if it were located in the UK so that BBC content may be accessed, for example); and
* To securely connect a computer to a company’s internal network or some part of it (a branch office, for example).
HTH helps some or all of our foreign counter-cats find a way to view Miss Advised
I had been using a VPN changer, wasn’t working. Tried another and it played! Yes! When this show starts, I don’t know how I am going to see it. I don’t think anyone will care enough to torrent it.
we will set up a virtual airlift for all you poor european/australian catladies, don’t worry!
Yeah, I am afraid the show will be too inconsequential to even be pirated. Which would be a great donkey burn, but i still want to see it.
It’s so much easier to pirate shit where I live than in the US that I’ve never found a need for Hulu/proxy servers. It’s just shit like previews/clips that are hard to find.
To watch pirated stuff or to actually pirate it?
Thanks! I forgot I had it installed and it works! As a former Project Runway and current Work of Art nut, i knew I used to be able to watch those Bravo videos.
YAY!
Ditto, me too!
A Donkey has seen her promo and is responding on Facebook with a “Dear God.” Then why link it? I guess she thinks she can control the story.
What I would give to be a fly on the 7/10 container of chocolate syrup right now!
Julia:
Dear god. http://www.bravotv.com/miss-advised
Miss Advised – Season 1 – Bravo TV Official Site
http://www.bravotv.com
Bravo Miss Advised – Season 1 – Bravo TV Official Site
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Down the Donkey hole she goes!
OMG, i love that picture.
All of Donkey’s hand-wringing about “Miss Advised” and how she looks, her weight, and how she comes across is so fake. She thinks she’s hot shit…always has, always will.
She’s just looking for someone to say YOU’RE SO SKINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNY!
Yes exactly. Sigh.
That’s what’s so fucking hilarious. She thinks she’s coyly agonizing over non-existent failings in order to make herself more adorkable, and everyone else is JESUS FUCK YOU LOOK LIKE A DERANGED SOCIOPATH ON THAT TEEVEE SHOW ALSO UGLY
You’re so right. I thought she was honestly freaking out about how horrifying she comes across, but it’s all a bunch of humble bragging disguised as self-deprecation. I should have known the donkey better than that.
This. She can’t fathom the idea that she’s truly cunty, unsightly, and shallow. To her, finding fault in her is an infallible sign that there’s something wrong with you, not with her. When she faces universal derision about the show, she’ll be echoing Emily Morse; “Everyone is wrong [about me] but me.”
But, but. . . she’s fat.
Agreed. No matter the Donkey’s weight, she is and always will be fat. The word just encompasses so much about her, which is a very difficult thing to do, because, you know…
you rang?
From Donkey’s Facebooks…
Here’s a pre-pre-preview of the first season of BRAVO’s “Miss Advised.” (In other news, I didn’t lose any weight for the show, and I’m now thinking that was a mistake. Oh well.)
Also:
“It finally feels real. Related: I want to vomit.”
Jesus, she is already trying to spin this as a negative experience and set bridges aflame with badmouthing the show MONTHS before it even airs. She knows she looks like shit, comes across as a maniac and there is NOTHING she can do about it, so she tries to spin the narrative like she was FORCED to sign up and participate. Dumb ass.
EXACTLY!!!
Well, the camera adds ten pounds, but not on each jowl, Donkey.
THIS!
Ha! yeah, I’m waiting for someone to comment on FB about the 10 lbs things.
The Bravo site is not quite up to date.
#13 in the “Hottest celebrity couples” slideshow is Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries.
http://www.bravotv.com/the-millionaire-matchmaker/season-5/photos/the-hottest-celebirty-couples#image-96464
Also from her FB, followed by a pic of miss advised website.
Julia Allison
5 minutes ago
It finally feels real. Related: I want to vomit.
Like · · Share
8 people like this.
8 people like this.
FECEBOOK TRANSBRAYTION:
Eight out of eight people already vomited.
Donkey should try for a Drano endorsement. For all your vomit-clogged shower drain needs.
Also, like another blogger who likes repurposing household items, Julia seems to have found a second use for Drano: foundation!
Drano: injectables!
#Brayno
so wait the only quality Bravo show is Randi’s…nicely played Randi
Not really. It looks like NYC Prep.
I’m so happy…I’m so excited…I…I…I’m in a glass case of emotion!
It finally feels real, Donk? Oh, just you wait. It’s about to get MAD real down here in the basement.
I NEED dj dave to make a rap for “it’s getting real in the RBD basement”, a la whole foods parking lot
this is the home page pic of her I see – the verboten side!!!! (it’s trying to make a run for it)
Julia Allison shared a link. 30 minutes ago.
Here’s a pre-pre-preview of the first season of BRAVO’s “Miss Advised.” (In other news, I didn’t lose any weight for the show, and I’m now thinking that was a mistake. Oh well.)
A little extra weight is NOT your problem donkey. That face is fucked.
24 People like this
Muhammad Ahmad
Triade Amarulloh/Gunadarma University
Hameed Rehman/ Works at Fairdeal marine
Besart Ademi
Fonico
Elisa Botello
Texas State
Fhay Arceo
Jennifer Roosth
Houston, Texas
Yohannes Mainda
Фахд Тиби..
Georgios Rigopoulos..
Ferhat Can/ Gıda Teknikeri at Gaziantep il kontrol laboratuvarı
Moezambiq Young/ Tidak ada Jabatan at Tidak kerja
Ahmed Sharaf Almakhadi
Alexandra Khouri
Mustafa Kemal/ Yetkili müdür at Tekstilci ve konfeksiyoncular
Tembong DaleEm
Iwan Ridwan Azzah/ AKPAR SAHID JAKARTA
Rose Wongsarnpigoon Truong
Caroline Gibson
Fawn Sullivan
Alfons Scholing
Pizzagallery Totò/ ITCG Federico Caffe
Dominique Renée Moradi
Walid Zarga/ Ecole superieur de commerce sfax
Houston, we have a problem.
well, at least one of those people is real: Caroline Gibson, Julia’s sad Wikipedia-editing PR gopher.
Kabul, we have a problem.
Does it make me a hysterical american to find it worrisome that Furhat Can at the Gazian Strip al- Control Laboratory is on facebook liking JA’s vomit instead of attending to his labratory duties?
I’m sure they’re all real people – in Afghanistan and Bulgaria
@bitchface: unpossible!
@ks: “Furhat” [sic & lol]
You forgot me, I’ve been here since she was alternately fucking Greasy and Pancakes
These Ahmed-come-lately guys are very stuff
This never gets old.
Curse the parent that named their child Pizzagallery Totò.
Pizzagallery Toto: stealing it.
It always baffles me that she thinks her problem is that she isn’t skinny enough. I know we like to play into that here, but seriously how can she think that face is acceptable?
OMG she looks exactly like an uglier Julia Sweeney in that photo. Julia Sweeney is a 50-year-old single mom workaholic who has had cancer, and she still looks better than 31-year-old Donkey whose ailments are all psychological.
It’s like she’s Julia Sweeney doing a horrible character. Only the horrible character is herself!
God she looks like a tranny.
SO MUCH THIS!
When I was little I had a t-shirt with this design and now I miss it so!
Brilliant.
Exactly this! <3
omg the number of gifs we’re going to get out of this. If no one here does it, I’m sure RealityTVGifs will.
I was thinking the same thing. I was getting gif giddy.
OT: Take a look at the last line of this article. Ouch!
http://www.observer.com/2012/04/which-obama-cabinet-official-was-this-close-to-doing-russian-spy-anna-chapman/
too bad all she’ll see is that she had her name in the paper
That was deeeee-licious.
That like fulfills each of my 73 requirements. Marriage nao?
We should start a “Wired Magazine Cover” wagering pool & place bets on when &/or how Donkey works that little tidbit into an episode.
My first of more than many+ bets would be:
* Framed cover hung as art.
$50s it’s in the first 45 seconds of her bit
I officially quit Bravo. All of those shows look horrendous.
I predict that you’ll be here the whole time.
someone needs to make a gif of her popping out in the prom dress. in case you can’t tell, that was ON A DATE. the dude was in the foreground, as she most likely reveals her idea of an ideal outfit to him.
she is braying maniacally. it is the craziest thing I have seen her do on screen. it literally looks like the reveal of the villain from an episode of the 1960s Batman show.
I was very very worried they would edit her sympathetic. they will no doubt tone down her evil but her psychosis is BLARING even in these clips.
also love how she is referred to as being “from” Los Angeles.
Blue prom dress screamgrab looks like maniacal Donkey got so giddy that she pissed herself.
And she’s wearing Jordan Reid’s tiara (which she stole from her home)!
Bonus points for ringing yourself, you lonely hater.
I would die for a gif of that moment! Cuntbunnies???
On a date IN A TUXEDO RENTAL SHOP!
Had to jump right to the bottom to post this so sorry if anyone has already said something similar.
The exaggerated voice-over combined with the absurdity of these premises made me immediately think of South Park. The entire video is more believable as a parody of the current state of television than it is as a real preview video of actual shows.
I’ll find the link later, but if you can find a clip from the South Park episode where the entire existence of Earth is actually an alien reality show, watch it and laugh. This is that.
Wait, so no Tina Pray? I was hoping she was going to end up as JA’s nemesis.
WHERE IS TINA??
She’s the special surprise cray extra. The cray cherry atop the cray sundae. Cray lagniappe.
Cray lagniappe. Bless your quirky heart for that one.
She’s the Alexis Carrington Cray, being saved to make a dramatic entrance a bit later.
Did Bravo choose Julia specifically because of us — the built-in audience who would undoubtedly watch her make a fool of herself?
If that’s the case, then I want a cut of the paltry amount she is complaining about getting paid.
Seriously! Papa needs cash for his $400 a month care lease too!
Oooooh, I am genuinely curious about how my g this kind of thing pays. Any entertainment types have any idea?
For new, untested shows, very little. I remember reading that Jersey Shore’s first-season contract gave each cast member only $500 per episode. The producers know that if the show takes off they’ll have to renegotiate much, much higher, but the majority of reality shows die in obscurity before you even hear about them. Mary was on one for a while. It had a name like One Ocean Place.
MONETIZE THE H8 BAYBEEE!
All those shows look repulsive. Would any real human in the nyc art scene really say they were “obsessed with carrie bradshaw”? How sad… and Silicon Valley is obviously populated by complete and utter knobs.
I thought the exact same thing. All of these shows are taking the basic formula (industry niche + weird professionals) and taking it too far. It was kind of fun to watch Million Dollar Listing and stuff like that, but do I really want to see a show about supposed gallerinas who would never, ever be able to pick up a job in any respectable NY gallery?
When the girl said that she loved Carrie Bradshaw I wanted to throw up.
It’s as though they sent out a single casting call titled IS CARRIE BRADSHAW YOUR SPIRIT ANIMAL? and got like six shows out of it.
I think this show is going to bite RZ in the ass. It’s really bad, and most people in SV are nothing like that.
true dat.
EXACTLY – and RZ should know!
Why does RZ need a TV show anyway?
Because it’s not enough for her just to have gotten rich off her brother’s coattails; she wants to be famous!
Yup, its the fame. In many ways she is like JA. Why do you think they got along so well?
EXCUSE YOU.
Randi Zuckerberg needs her own show because she is a very talented singer, destined for great stardom.
I wonder if she’s going to do the theme song a la Dennis Waterman?
MY BOLD PREDICTION:
Julia will find her husband thanks to this show. Or at least her first marriage.
She’ll end up marrying a guy from another BRAVO show. It will be someone that’s on another reality show and they’ll meet at a rap party or some other press junket for their shows. Both narcissists will find comfort in each other after being over-exposed and ridiculed by millions. They’ll also both believe that they can parlay their reality TV appearances into some sort of “Media Empire” only to be smacked in the face by reality when they both find themselves without a job or a sustainable business.
But at least they’ll have each other… for like 18 months.
Please let it be Slade. Please let it be Slade. Please, please.
Ewww, it will probably be one of the Silicon Valley losers. Not only are they desperate enough to be on that show, they are desperate enough to date her…and vice versa. Or, she suddenly thinks they have “fame.” Vom.
And seriously, Hermione Way? They weren’t trying hard enough. Also, much more interesting people exist in SV than the BROs they chose.
I like it!
OMG- She’ll totally be one half of the next “Speidi”!!!!!
She’s already got the “untalented” and “too much plastic surgery” bits down. And that Little Mermaid lipdub can double as her “break” into the music industry.
She’s an older, more haggard, less talented version of Heidi
Montag
& if it’s Slade, shall we call ‘em:
“Brayde” ?
“Donkeyade” ?
I like “Slonkey”
I do too
This is the best comment EVER…
is Speidi still around? are they still of this world?
Feel free to copy my screen name.
Don’t know if anyone’s mentioned this, but remember the OWN competition Julia almost signed up for? I just looked into it and apparently the Zach guy (with cerebral palsy?) people liked on here won, but his show already got canceled.
http://www.oprah.com/own-rollin-with-zach/Rollin-With-Zach
http://www.oprah.com/own-your-own-show/your-own-show.html
I am pretty sure that whole network is on its way to being cancelled.
Bravo: since 2012, ensuring, that Julia Allison’s all-time most meaningful interaction with a man remains asking for the dressing on the side.
DONE! It’s not perfect but I did the best I could
OMG! LMSAO!
gold star KashMoney!
::drops phone::
::drops phone:::
::drops the mother fucking phone::
the perfect juxtaposition, now in the page footer!
If Bravo offers to buy RBD, I will not be surprised, cuz this place has turned in a magnificent bevy of shitheads.
HOLY CRAP I’M IN THE FOOTER!!!!!!!!!!!! YAYAYAYAY
I literally cannot tear my eyes away.
so perfect
Perez Hilton now has a “Miss Advised” tag on his blog! I would die if he ever blogged about her.
http://perezhilton.com/tag/miss_advised
They share a manager.
From FB:
Brit Morin Congrats girl!
40 minutes ago · Like
Julia Allison Thank you B! Can’t wait to see the episode with YOU in it!
13 minutes ago · Like
Brit Morin is so fake. Totes used her for Bravo exposure. Vom in the shower.
Gotta say, I’ve got mixed feelings. I resent the shit out of the fact that after her years of scheming she has finally gotten what she wanted. At the end of the day, that’s the way she sees it. Even the most hated “Bravolebrity” still gets their ass kissed (to their faces) with special treatment and freebies and opportunities they don’t deserve. It pisses me off, to a degree, and having a weekly dose of her lunacy to look forward to or additional cat ladies to validate our opinions only soothes me on a shallow level. Julia has won, people. And that is a sad day in the basement.
Uh, no, personally I feel like *I* have won, because after I get to LMSAO at Donkey snorting & pawing the ground in front of potential millions & securing her spinsterhood while at it, she’ll be sobbing hysterically & I’ll still be LMSAO.
We laugh, she cries. Same ol, same ol. Difference is, now she thinks, correctly, that her antics got her what she wanted for all these years. In her crazy lunatic bobblehead this is validation that will fuel her plethora of personality disorders for decades.
But her crazy antics DID get her what she wanted, they got her a reality show, & you’re right that she feels validated … for now.
REMEMBER: She meant it at the time!
When it blows up in her face, other than finally looking like she has an excuse for sportin’ that busted face, she will be that much more of a joke & (AND) she’ll know what it’s like to have been used to promote oneself, cuz Jelly D & Flusher Price etc will be long gone.
I think we’re thinking almost exactly the same things, except you’re letting it ruin your day while that very thing makes me laugh (at her, not you; I hope that comes across right).
Nothing JA can ruin my day. “You have no power here! Be gone, before somebody drops a house on YOU!” haha
However, as much as you think correctly that her truth (lol) will shine through, it won’t matter. It won’t matter that JD and FP aren’t around like it doesn’t matter that MMBH et al aren’t.
IDK it just upsets me that society rewards this shit in general, which in turn validates a psychopath, etc. Ruin my day? No. Make me vom? Just a little bit in my mouth. I’d rather see her not get what she wants and become increasingly irrelevant than, well, this.
I do know what you mean, but it’s fine with me if she thinks she won. It’s fine with me if she actually won; in no way, however, does that suggest we lost. This is a DREAM scenario.
Yeah, ^ THAT.
JA would think she won even if she went to sleep every night in a cardboard box lined with wilting tutus and broken tiaras.
Yes, Handbag…exactly. What Donkey does or doesn’t get out of it is irrelevant. What matters is how many laughs are there going to be for the catpeople? The answer to that is…a bazillion, at least! Thanks Bravo!
But this isn’t really what she wanted! If she had her way she would have been married, before expiration, to an omgivygradtechfounder billionaire. Instead, she’s 31, on basic cable, right side of face clearly in view, looking all melty.
Exactly. Deep down (if she even has a place like that) she knows this SO FAR from what she really wanted/wants.
In Donkey’s mind, she is always “winning”. She will always be winning because she is delusional. Make no mistake, this show is not a win for her. It is a win for us. It will bring more people to this site and inoculate the viewing public against her vampiric personality and scams. It will bring many lulz, screengrabs, and memes (oxford comma? you better believe it!).
She didn’t get the show because she worked hard or has a great personality. She got it because she is a trainwreck and that is what sells on TV.
If it makes you feel better, this is certainly the nail in the coffin of her ever meeting a normal man and having that fairytale ending she’s been dreaming of since birth. Before this show, you would have had to work a bit to dig up the crazy about julia allison. After this show, there will be youtubes, plot synopses. perez hiltons, ontd’s, etc all over the web detailing her exploits.
UPVOTE!
I agree. Doing this show was her deal with the devil. It’ll bring her the attention and notoriety that she craves, but the moment she signed on to do it she signed away her chances at scoring a worthwhile dude. Define worthwhile as you will. Anyway, she won’t be able to take this back once it’s out there!
Won what? She sold what was left of her dignity, she’s ruined her face, she’s alone and she’s running on a hamster wheel. Look at the yahoos on Jersey Shore. They’ve been going on a for a lot longer then I’m sure was predicted but in a couple of years all of will be saying, “Snooki who?” And her child will get to see his/her mother’s cooka on constant replay. What does she have to look forward to? Sadly, this is heading into, “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane” territory.
True, however those idiots are all multimillionaires now. And I’m sorry but that sickens me.
I totally get your point – but my opinion is this show is going to bring us so many lulz but ultimately be very unsuccessful. As someone mentioned, reality TV is saturated with trainwrecks – they can’t all get a piece of the pie.
And while she might get air time – I would think if there is a product to endorse (unless it’s prom dresses for the demented) the deal will go to Emily or Amy – but I don’t think it will even be that big – I think it will die off like NY Prep and that South Beach show they did.
It’s also not good news for a Donkey that Bravo has so much in development – that means there will lots and lots of product to replace her shitty show.
Yes. All those $$ is like vinegar being splashed in my eyes. I forgot about that. On the other hand, there are things in my life that seemed like a good idea when I was younger and now I am THRILLED there’s no trail. (well, nothing as in ‘the internet never forgets’, or taped… as far as I know). Since I don’t have that kind of money, I don’t know for how much I’d be able to justify selling my reputation, my body, my soul and be fine with it 20 years from now. I do know who I am now and who I was years ago is dramatically different and I can look my children in the eye and say that I never did drugs, never lied, never skipped school, never mouthed back to my parents, and never had any kind of life before they were born. No matter how cool or in-the-moment you were during your glory days, your kids will NOT be impressed. They will be embarrassed and mortified. In JAB’s case, I don’t think she’ll get married and have kids but I suspect Britt and Allie will. And I know from experience what trying to have to explain a whack-a-doodle aunt to kids is like. It’s icky by proxy.
Just re-read this and the part that needs to be emphasized is, “… and I can look my children in the eye and “say”…” You know, “SAY” as in there’s nothing I know of to incriminate me so I can deny, deny, deny.
well, you could be like that too if you did all the shit she did. It’s not hard; you have to have no morals and no real self-esteem to put yourself out there again and again, have no real friends, live a completely phony life and pretend everything is normal
that or a sociopath
Uh, The Situation is in rehab and rumored to be broke. Don’t underestimate an idiot’s ability to fuck up even the best opportunity.
Yes. He’s another one getting a bit long-in-the-tooth to be living the life of a rebellious 16 year old.
Here’s the thing – here’s the thing! – on the “Jersey Shore”/”Miss Advised” comparison. The JS morons are kids – they’re getting paid by clubs for appearances and brands that are youth-oriented and the like. Their audience is made up of a bunch of idiots with too much disposable income and not enough sense. See, for example, the spate of “Jersey Shore” theme parties that erupted when the show first came out. They looked like they were having fun and kids who wanted to have fun wanted to emulate them, if only for a bit and in good fun. They got paid as a result.
Now, think about “Miss Advised.” What are the chances of Donks getting paid for a club appearance? Who wants to have a sad-ass spinster party? Who will want to emulate the busted-faced goon in a prom dress, even in fun?
You can rest assured that she will NOT be making fuck you money from this.
Yeah. Plus – while Donkey wants to be famous, she also wants respect. She wants to be seen as beautiful and smart successful. Deep down she knows that she’s settling for some cheap fame because it’s all she can get.
Eggggsactly.
I agree that to Julia – she won, but I would never want her life so I just think “meh, let her win.”
You cat ladies are wise beyond your whiskers.
She won, but in the doomed sense of “May you get exactly what you wish.” kind of way.
Fuck it, pass the popcorn.
Ha, now you’re talkin’!
Yes. This.
‘Be careful what you wish for…’
The donkey’s hoof is the new monkey’s paw.
I think I am most looking forward to the post date interviews with the dial a dates. I can barely contain my squeals when I think about her watching them trash her.
Do you think she will get to preview (not edit, just watch) the episodes or will she only see them when they air?
The second thing I am most looking forward to is the reunion. Cannot. Wait.
Here’s a thought, how many men do you think have said “I’m tired of your bullshit Julia”?
Not enough.
I agree. And I don’t think most men are confrontational like this. I think they get exhausted of her bullshit and peace out.
Every one she’s dated so far. And a couple she just wanted to date (Hi, Kevin Rose! Congrats on the engagement!).
De-lurking to say that I adore you cat ladies and I look forward to riding this wave of crazy with you. Soon there will be many, many others but I am a proud fan from way back when.
This! I remember this from its inception. My black, cold heart swells with pride to say, “I knew you when…”
Misty water-colored memories…..
I feel the same way <3
Lurker of about a year, de-lurking to ‘ditto’ this sentiment (and I guess get in before the influx of new catladies next fall?). Love this site and the daily lawls it provides me while at my desk errands! I feel like a fangirl of the catladies…and I like it.
Word.
Yes, same here! Actually, seeing all of the Bravo stuff finally being up made me “come out of the basement” to my catman, who had no idea of my JA hate. Because I want to be able to watch the show and snark on JA openly! Good lord, it looks so deliciously terribly.
Oops, “terrible.” Too much Cheeto dust on the screen.
The Bravo show caused a “confessional” to my catman too! I told him that is was the ONLY reality show I would ever insist on watching!
“Why wait for a guy to call when you can just pick up a phone and stalk him yourself?”
How else was she ever going to hear FlapJack’s voice again?
I bet she live for those late night calls when she gets to … hear him say his name on his voice mail.
Over and over again.
That link of her in the blue dress reminds me of LITTLE EDIE in Grey Gardens.
Yeah now, don’t insult Little Edie like that!
I share all your excitement and she looks just as fucking demented and ridiculous in every clip as I imagined she would. However, I would like to point out that ABSOLUTELY NO ONE IS GOING TO WATCH THIS. With completely outrageous batshit insane lunatics on reality tv (Mob Wives anyone?)…and reality tv being ALL ABOUT knocking down the assholes/pointing and laughing/seeing how insane people can be, who in the FUCK is gonna care about three desperate nobodies trying to find a man? This show will last a few episodes and never be heard from again.
But I fucking LOVE how she will never be able to argue that we are all mean jealous haters again. AHAHAHAHA now we have a legitimate excuse for snarking – she’s trying SO HARD to be a real celeb. Good luck with that cease and desist shit Dadsers!!!! The dozens of people who watch this are gonna be automatic hater-converts. It’s delicious.
Doesn’t that mean little ferret-like one, Emily Morse, have a lot of followers on her blog & radio show? I imagine they all have some built-in viewers, so that’s quite a few more people learning what an ass Donkey is, besides the random rubberneckers.
I just still can’t see anyone watching this. I mean it is literally the most boring premise of any reality show I have ever seen. No? Yes. I can’t understand for a second how this got the green light. Even with the dregs of existence reality tv usually highlights.
Oh man, Mob Wives!!!
Have you ever watched My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding?
Mob Wives is a work of utter genius. I worship those women.
Big Ang is my spirit animal.
I live in SI and kind of dig them myself mainly because they make me laugh and go to restaurants I like.
I actually am pretty sensitive about italian stereotypes and I think it’s pretty disgusting that one of the ladies is the daughter of a psychopathic killer. Just…you should hide your head in shame not brag about your associations with murderers. And they just act like complete animals! I did watch the one where they get into a fistfight at that partya nd it was just like…wow. Otherwise I got sorta sick of their bickering. I can get that from calling my mother.
Big Ang is possibly my soulmate and I LOVE MBFGW! My bf and I are obsessed with Paddy (the trailer park manager) and the little 12-year old boy with frosted tips who is so sleazy it burns.
Interest. piqued. … Say what?
I’m not going to watch it.
can’t wait for donk to be on the celebrity apprentice. that’s when the real cray is sure to come out!
I would LOVE this! Imagine her trying to spin in the boardroom and being held accountable!
Wow. I actually have to give Donkey some credit. I totally didn’t think she would make it to the final product. Congratulations, Donkey, you didn’t end up on the cutting room floor. Instead you will just look like a fool in front of the whole world… or the tens of viewers this show will attract. Kudos.
P.S. I just watched that clip and Bravo finally got that Silicone Valley show off the ground. Good work, Bravo. That only took, what? Five, six years?
Kadooze.
Honey.
OT personal drama:
As if yesterday’s tornadoes weren’t intense enough (for several long hours) …
1st thing today, dog got her paw trapped in fence slats (crazy, scary yelping) …
Just now, there was a g-d bullsnake behind my fridge! Two feet long! WTF?
I. don’t. do. drama. (not very well, anyway)
Dog is fine; snake-discovering cats will get there; & Ima get my drink on now.
End of days. We’re all doomed.
glad your dog is ok!
Thanks! She’s a cowed-by-the-cats kinda sweetie w/ a penchant for squirrels & an ability to scale 8′ft fences, so I’ve been dreading the day that she might hang her collar on a fence post — I damn near shit my britches when it seemed that today was THAT day.
Basically trained & obedient, but no one ever thought to restrain her from ground level attacks … living & learning, we are.
They make special collars for crazed fence-jumpers like yours, Brayella.
http://www.breakawaycollar.com/
I love how smug this dog is about cheating death:
Hope you get a break from the drama, you’ve earned it.
Thank you, Mini! I will get one of those STAT.
I *just* went to move her down (she’d put her paws up on the bed) & because she hasn’t been favoring that paw, I didn’t expect the little yelp she gave. Awww!
Okay folks we need a poll:
HOW MANY EPISODES BEOFRE THIS SHIT IS CANCELLED?
A. One
B. Three
C. Five
Hard to say. Do Bravo’s shows get cancelled or do they just run their courses? I think it might just run for all 12 and then fade away.
I hope it goes on forever.
I hope it leads to other reality shows! Donkey could finally monetize her untended psychosis villain-style like Amarosa. I personally would love to see Donkey on SURVIVOR (she already has down pat the wear-the-same-stinky-shit-for-seven-days gig) where her ass would get schooled on ‘play nice or GTFO’.
MMBH’s reality series made it 2 shows, right? I think Julia’s crazy shitshow will last at least double that. Bravo’s got the type of audience that will eat the craycray right up.
Before I read any of these comments, I want to say that I am sooo pissed off that I can’t watch the Bravo video. It won’t play on my iPad or iPhone, so I took my crippled ass down two flights of stairs to watch it on a laptop, but it wouldn’t play in Safari or IE there either. Has anyone copied it and uploaded it to YouTube?
PLEASE SOMEONE LOAD IT ON YOUTUBE!!!!!!!
I am in the same boat, girl.
I can’t see it either. BRAVO’s (sic) website is just the worst.
you guys are fucking KILLING ME….
Look upon me, and despair.
INVISIBLE SEGWAY!!!!!!!!!
My first thought was more along the lines of ‘rotating on a gearshift’, but yeah, Donkey wouldn’t ever burn that many calories if she could outsource the overall effort in any way.
SNORTING.
She. Looks. Nutters! Off her rocker in this scene. AND The jowels in the many images posted are perplexing…She’s as thin as she’s ever been, yet the face is so poofy.
I write about reality television and have been a cat lady for years (lurking, always lurking) and just told my editors I want on the JA beat. Most people don’t know the reality… but I will be on the frontlines for you.
xoxo bunnies!
Hah! This getting more & more fun!
BTW, you’ll probably be getting an email from Donkey in 3…2…1…
Julia likely won’t care what I write about her because i stay away from weight snark (I will botox and extensions snark for all eternity, however). And as we’ve seen, all she cares about is whether or not people think she is fat.
You are doing the Lord’s work, m’dear.
Hmmm (just JFA’ing myself for a minute here). I wonder if I should request a special assignment at MY place of employment. On the grounds that I am uniquely qualified in Donkology, and that I have a following who might care to read my ditherings on the subject.
Do it! And if they say no, maybe MMBH could do it if she’s still got her Chron “blog.”
Is it weird that I processed a mention of MMBH’s ‘Chron “blog’ as ‘colostomy bag‘?
Cuz I did. I most surely did.
I should recap this and get paid for this shit.
Andy Cohen, send this PR pro a fabulous comped wardrobe, stat!
(but seriously, JP, how dare you think you can come into the this country and take a job that pays peanuts and has no benefits away from an American Taskrabbit?!)
Bitch, I was born here.
Dude, I fucking know that, I was trying to make a funny haha
I’m sorry I couldn’t really hear with all this Rio Grande water in my ears.
Mexicanth!
Yes, you should! Both you and Mama Jacy.
I love reality tea and can’t wait for your stories!!!
I read your site all the time. Never would have imagined that you were a catlady.
holy. shit.
this summer is going to be epic.
Maria! I hope you’re prepared for a C&D letter from Peter Baugher, LOLawyer.
I love Reality Tea! Can’t wait to read your Julie posts.
I love RealityTea! Read it on the daily. Very cool.
OMG, didn’t realize cat ladies read RT! Thanks for reading us!
Oh, you guys are the best. I don’t even need to watch the shows!
Does Julia have no discipline or even residual ED left? I’m shocked — shocked — she didn’t drastically crash diet for her role on Bravo. Stars do it all the time. Julia, don’t you want to be a star?
“Does Julia have no discipline?”
If she did, her life would probably be quite a bit different.
I don’t like to share. It’s going to be hard when all the new people start rolling in. I want to keep all my cat ladies to myself!
After all these years of following, it’s hard to not have mixed feelings. I don’t want her to succeed but I also want to revel in the pure crazy that the show will be.
I feel the same. To be honest, I’m vaguely worried that a lot of idiots will infiltrate the ranks… kind of like what’s recently happened to GOMI (IMHO).
I still don’t know who ye fuck any of the people GOMI writes about are.
FYI, it was your writing about “Adriend” over on GOMI that got me hooked in the first place.
It was only then I found out how horrible Julia Baugher is and came here.
I “loled” about this for at least a week.
“Of course it would be more admirable for him to work for those nice things instead of hoping that some real estate billionaire with a pissing twink fetish will just give them to him.”
Ah, memories.
Me too! I feel like our little group will get too diluted with crazies, like what happened on GOMI. And you can always expect a couple of white knights to float in and it’s SO ANNOYING when that happens.
I WANT TO KEEP YOU BITCHES ALL TO MYSELF!
I have RSI from hitting the ‘like’ button so many times on this thread.
I love that Randi is producing her own show. Used Donkey for her Bravo contacts and then kicked her to the curb!
Giving her a taste of her own medicine. Only I don’t think Donkey ever played it so well.
May I propose a viewing party? We can dress in our JA best and drink Franzia at one of Julia’s favorite restaurants (once she finds out what they are). I’ll even bring a notebook so everyone can account for how many sips of alcohol they drank over the course of the evening!
PS – I call SEXY Firefox.
I call Easter Whore!
We’ll be living in L.A. by the time this atrocity airs, and I’m planning on throwing a come-as-your-favorite-RBD-character costume ball for the premiere. Have you ever fantasized about being MareMare Beach Hair? OMG Randi? Pancakes McCain? [Redacted 1 or 2]? Probably not, but why not live out your RBD nightmare? All La La Land catladies are invited!
That sounds tots awesome. I’d go, if I could.
We’d love to have you, as it were, so to speak.
Bray, don’t u live in boston area? I do we could have a cat lady bicoastal hookup and Skype or FaceTime.
Yes!!! I want an Austin viewing parteeee!
I would totally go to an Austin viewing party!
First of all, this is amazing and I haven’t read through all comments yet. I love RBD, and I love you catladies and catgents. Second of all, I KANT WITH THIS DONKEY:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9753adIFus
Screenshots, bullshit ahead. OY VEY. #thankyouSS
What’s with all the faces she makes? She is SOOOOOO affected and utterly repulsive in every way.
All da Botox iz leak into your brain and iz give you perma-twitch.
Also, your face is so fat pumped it barely fits on to the screen.
In conclusion: Donkey.
NOTE TO CAPTCHA: It’s too late for “Save Face” !
p.s. WOOF!
I can’t believe this is real.
Dear God, is this doctored in any way?????
What is going on with the nose? It’s spreading faster than Donkey’s lips for a pair of shoes!
Wow! I will never again curse my crinkly eyes, the crease in my forehead or the natural movement of my my face.
So. Much. Like. Wax.
Jimmy Fallon in drag.
“I traveled with my suitcase, and my laptop, and my iPhone.”</b.
Yeah, you couch-surfin' skank … BUT WTF ABOUT YOUR DOG LILLY?
Except when she was living in the assisted living condo and the home she shared in Coronado. She is such a liar liar pants on fire. What a fake! And the blinking with the three inch lashes is making a hurricane in the pacific ocean.
She said she was poor.
Hahahahahaha.
Wait.
Hahahahahahahaaaaaaa.
“No one’s gonna rescue you”…except Dad$ser$
Sooooo…. I guess now we know what website she’s been “working” on? zendigitalnomad.com. And she told this dude the site would be up by the time the video was posted… LOL.
The site is empty! Serious bizness ladee!
The show is gonnabe pathetisad, but thing I’m most irritated with us her list of 73 criteria for a husband. Bitch, if you ever get married, do you really think you’ll be meeting every wish and desire your mate ever dreamed of? I know I don’t- not that i don’t try to make him happy- but more that he accepts my flaws and I accept his. that’s why I feel lucky- my husband decided that even though I don’t like to sit at the movies as much as he does that I’m still worthy; even though he doesn’t run races with me I think he’s the tits.
This stuff isnt rocket science, but a donkey is just so formulaic, unrealistic, special snowflake, unloving, snobby, and oh-so-feminist. Pound salt, donk.
But numbers 1 – 72 are “MUST BE RICH”.
when I was 20, I wrote a 53 item list of must-haves for anyone I’d consider getting into a relationship with. now, at 30, I look over that list (online diary, the internet never forgets!) and while some of those things I still go “oh hell yes!” (20 year old me was after a ‘thick dick;’ 30 year old me still very much agrees), at this point I recognize the insanity of such a list and I would never put that list against anyone I meet today.
like most remotely-well-adjusted adults, over the past decade I’ve learned that no one is perfect, relationships are not about keeping score, and no person is ever going to fit into some ridiculous ideal. conversely, in the past decade, julia has just added more items to her list. yep, she may be on some reality show now. but she’ll never live up to her family’s expectations or fit in with their level of education or accomplishments (and she will always feel inadequate); she will never, ever have a real genuine relationship with anyone; she will never know the sense of satisfaction one gets from working a real job and contributing to something concrete and tangible; she will never know the feeling of accomplishment one gets from being a real adult and fully taking care of yourself; and even though she is shallow enough to fool herself into thinking that the ‘life’ she’s made for herself makes her happy, there will always be that niggling edge of discontent always there right beneath the surface, she will always have to keep searching for something MORE to chase away that feeling, she will continue to fuck up her face with needless surgeries, and she will never, ever be truly happy. I’d feel sorry for her if she wasn’t such a crappy person who is incapable of learning from her mistakes.
and on a less-thoughtful note, oh dear lord, she looks like someone recovering from a recent stroke in this screengrab: http://rebloggingdonk.com/2012/04/04/julia-allison-im-looking-for-my-husband-and-i-have-a-73-piont-checklist/#comment-343553
This. Peoole are who they are, not what you want them to be.
I’m marrying my dudecat very soon and I love him for all the things he is. I can’t tell you whether he meets any criteria I have/had outside of ‘funny’, ‘intelligent’, and ‘a good friend to people’ because this is people and relationships, not a fucking spreadsheet.
It’s amazing to me that someone who can’t hold almost any man past one date thinks she is gonna land the man of her dreams. It just speaks for itself right there.
Alexis Bellino of Bravo’s OC Housewives said she had 150 things on her list, so JA even stole that line from a fellow Bray-vo colleague.
And see how well that ended up for Alexis Bellino? She ended up with Earth Jesus. *shivers*
So pumped.
Hahaha!
Julia Gallianoson.
Any surprise that Donkey wakes up w/ a 5:00 o’clock shadow?
Here’s.The.Thing I find kind of amazing. Look at every Bravo show. They sell product, some are damn near advertorial. The Bravolebrities generally have their own careers or businesses or various side gigs. Bravo makes sense for them because no matter what, they aren’t relying on the Bravo paycheck to make their money. They are doing it for publicity because they have something to promote. Now if a Donkey were smart, which it has been proved multiple times she is not, she would have a book in the works set to come out. She thinks a book is “too hard” and a YouTube show is easier. But loser who can’t find a husband isn’t exactly an appealing platform to work from. Her goal is always to get as much with as little work as possible and this more than anything else is her fatal flaw.
“Her goal is always to get as much with as little work as possible and this more than anything else is her fatal flaw.”
THIS!!!
Said it before and I’ll say it again: JP and Jacy are the BEST for keeping RBD alive through all of our trials and tribulations. It will all have been worth it once this show airs.
I do hope you both find some way to monetize all your hard work. Lord knows you deserve it!
p.s. that GIF at the bottom of the site is awesome.
I feel like I just drank 13/16 of myself reading this thread.
Could it be that time I’ve spent on this clown since that awful time she live commented (or whatever) at Gawker after her [Redacted] breakup has finally culminated into… something?
Bombs away.
I don’t think I can even watch it. I was pissed off at first she got a show, then pretty damn excited…now I just realize how fucking irritating and terrible she is and the internal hives I get any time I have to watch her animated for at least 3 seconds. I will probably attempt to watch the first episode, get bored and disgusted and wanna kick walls, and change the channel. I imagine that will be the typical response of the American public.
Unrelated, I broke my foot and am in a bad mood.