Miss Advised Sounds Like It’s Not Going To Disappoint The Angry Basement-Dwelling Type-A Hater Cat Ladies

Someone working on post-production for the show reports that Donkey comes off “atrociously.” Her words, not ours. A complete phony joke, always performing, hamming it up, seems like a total disingenuous tool, etc etc. In other words, just being her usual Donkey self.

JellyD is also on the show. That’s right — that’s how she’s getting dudes interested in her now. Anyway, the prolific chick magnet — currently juggling several ladies and one donkey — agreed to appear in the show as long as his music was included somehow. And so it will be.  I can hear the braying now. “YOU CAN’T BREAK IT OFF WITH ME!!!! YOU OWE ME!! I MADE YOU!!!!

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351 Responses to Miss Advised Sounds Like It’s Not Going To Disappoint The Angry Basement-Dwelling Type-A Hater Cat Ladies

  1. "Pilot" is the new "keynote" says:

    Pass the popcorn! CANNOT WAIT.

    • Aspen>Tulips says:

      ME NEITHER. And Bravo loves to edit assholes to be even more asshole-y. This is going to be amaze-balls.

      • Edward R. Burro says:

        THIS! She will be the assholiest Bravo-lebrity ever.

        When is this going to air? This summer?

        • Donkey of Perdition says:

          That says alot considering the assholes they have on Bravo.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          I recently read somewhere (not here) that it’s airing this fall. Seems like it may have been tied to something about Tina Pray (is that the 4th’s name?) that I’d come across. I don’t know, I’ve slept since then.

          • Princess WideStance says:

            Yes, that article said this fall. I wonder if that’s accurate…

            Jacy?? Have you heard when this work of art will premier?

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            I thought it was the summer but I am not sure and wonder if maybe it hasn’t even been determined yet.

          • Dr. Gary says:

            Remember the mover’s son, who kept tweeting at Julie? One of this last tweets said something like ‘are you gonna mention us in May like you said you would?’

            That made me think she told him their company would be mentioned when the show aired, which was May. But sounds like it’s been pushed to Nov?

          • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

            It will tell us a lot based on when they air it. If it’s on in the summer, it usually means it’s a piece of crap that they are willing to let die.

            If it’s on in the Fall, that means they have more confidence in it.

          • AFGHANI says:

            The mover’s son’s twitter is still private, ever since the last time I posted his tweets about “where is the publicity you promised us” or whatever it was.

    • Prof. F Camping says:

      [img]http://i.imgur.com/61lDc.gif[/img]

  2. Tribune Slingbacks says:

    I’ve been away too long. What’s a Jelly D?

    • LEFOOLIEH says:

      A rapping donut and the latest target of a certain donkey: http://twitter.com/jellyd . IIrc, he was somehow involved with either the video, song or commercial that used the song she was frighteningly mouthing/dancing along to in her V-Day “date” video, because she is not transparent at all.

      • Tribune Slingbacks says:

        …V-Day date video? (missed u, donkey)

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          You’re out of luck — it was a terrifying shit show, her face was off the charts, but she took it private. On her way out for a Valentine’s Day “date” while claiming to be obsessing over a song some other dude she’s boning was involved in. You know, the usual adolescent games.

        • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

          There was a herp derp dance too! On the other hand, her grimace and bloat face would keep you awake for decades!

          • JFA says:

            Also her tits made an appearance. I remember one thing I could not stand about her in the Gawker days was she ALWAYS AND FOREVER showed cleavage, as if she was the only woman alive with “perfectly symmetrical breasts.” Put your tits away and put away the cutlet bras while you are at it.

          • Julie Booger's Crown Is Upside Down says:

            I found the constant cleavage pride to be one of her very few endearing qualities given her endless catalog of body/mind/health issues. She has a nice rack, why not flaunt it? It might be her only legitimate asset.

          • Dr. Gary says:

            @Julie Booger’s Crown Is Upside Down

            Except sadly, it’s not. Her cleavage is all smoke and mirrors, Victoria’s Secret push up bras and chicken cutlets.

          • LEFOOLIEH says:

            Former “sister/bunny” says: “Challenge accepted.”

            [img]http://i.imgur.com/aNvEf.jpg[/img]

          • Julie Booger's Crown Is Upside Down says:

            Well thank you oh Dr Gary for explaining to me how bras work. Please let me know the dates for your lectures on Ice: Really Cold Water and The Fantastically Efficient Round Wheel.

      • Authenticity Costume says:

        oh my fucking god..are you kidding me? the pastry is an ACD at goodby?? how small is this fucking town? i hate it sometimes.

  3. Donkey of Perdition says:

    So if it’s in post production then the camera’s have stopped? I hope this makes it to Bravo and doesn’t get lost in the shuffle.

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      The editors/post production start the first day cameras are rolling in order to keep up with all the tape… so it’s anyone’s guess.

  4. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    AMAZE-BALLS! Great intel…

  5. so sorry, so fat says:

    squeeeee! so excited! this is happening in my head right now: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0p2lZ3XNmd4

  6. Random Snowflake says:

    Donk is really gonna lose her shit when she doesn’t read this. She has probably deluded herself into thinking Bravo will portray her as the special snowflake pretty princess she knows she is. It’s gonna be nuts to see her reactions once the episodes start airing. 🙂

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      I’m so curious if she looks like a lunatic because she’s trying to be overly nice/dressing like a Toddler & Tiara star or if they ever caught her on camera scheming and acting real cray cray.

  7. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    You know, Jelly D ‘s videos give me the LOLs but that said, is this really worth it for him to get it on with a Donkey? Even for the exposure?

    Is there one guy who has dated a Donkey that has come out unscathed? That has not been stalked or their girlfriend stalked or been embarrassed? That has ever said, it was fun while it lasted? I mean, it seems we would be reaching back to Cancer Dan and that was over a dozen years ago.

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      I never watched any of the donut videos, but just from the looks of it I thought his music was a joke, like parody stuff. Is he a for real musician?

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Speaking of Dan, I want to applaud him and Wife of Dan for maintaining the total Internet silence on their wedding. I was sure A Donkey would somehow “oops” them.

  8. Princess WideStance says:

    Gee Julia, I really hope you don’t come off looking like a RETARDED ASSHOLE.

  9. Dr. Gary says:

    This made my day. Fingers crossed that this show makes it to air.

  10. Can-Swiss says:

    I can’t wait. Although I do expect to have that feeling you get when the band you liked makes it big-time.

    I know it’s stupid, but The Black Keys were my band and now they are on SNL and shit. THEY WERE MINE FIRST.

    We knew Julia Allison before EVERYONE knew she was a lunatic. I hated her when she was an indie-asshole.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      My cathus feels exactly the same way about The Black Keys. He was going to all the small shows in LA, back before anyone had heard of them. I am still kicking myself for not seeing them (at the Wiltern?) with him about 4 or 5 years ago.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Why did the hipster burn his mouth?

      He ate pizza before it was cool.

      I kid, Can-Swiss. I know the feeling. I am the same way about They Might Be Giants and Yo La Tengo.

      • Dr. Gary says:

        Back when I still lived in Williamsburg (1997-ish), my ex and I went out to dinner one night. The restaurant was very small, and had tables right next to each other. There was a guy next to us, wearing huge black hipster glasses. I said to my boyfriend (loud enough for the guy to hear me), ‘God. Look at that guy. Who does he think he is? They Might Be Giants?’

        My boyfriend looked like he wanted to crawl under the table and shot daggers at me with his eyes. He leaned in and whispered, ‘that IS the guy from They Might Be Giants.’

  11. NonSobriety says:

    I remember a time when A Desperate Donkey threatened suicide by paperclips because people didn’t like her. What if this shit show backfires? What if she is sent into such a such a tailspin that she can’t keep her helo in the air-babe by the backlash whiplash that she buys every paperclip in Office Depot in attempts to scribble out the “Let it Unfold” that got her there? It takes a strong sense of self to withstand the type of mass criticism that comes from being on TV and A Donkey can’t even handle catladies without spazzing out. She can’t send Cease and Desists to a nation of media.

  12. Albie Quirky says:

    I can only express my joy through the miracle of interpretive dance:

    [img]http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z200/venuscloacina/th_chicken.gif[/img]

  13. Powerful Moms with Fantastic Sons (aka Cindy McCain's Medicine Cabinet) says:

    I hate that this bitch keeps failing up, but dammit, I am pretty psyched to see her in full crazy glory on the teevees!

  14. Dr. Gary says:

    Oh for fuck’s sake. Is this her way of announcing that her Grandma died?

    @JuliaAllison: What do you wish you could have asked your late grandparent?

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      SHE IS SUCH A TACKY BITCH.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      OMG that is awful. Just dreadful. She is crowd-sourcing questions re: what to ask her grandmother as the woman is lying dying. JESUS CHRIST. You are not a fully formed human being. THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        “Is there money $ta$hed under your matre$$? Tell me now, before I agree to help Mom$er can flip that damn thing!”

    • Donkey of Perdition says:

      Where are the keys to your safe deposit box?

      • ks says:

        I hit “Like” 3 times. It appears to vote, but the number sadly does not increment above 1.

      • Edward R. Burro says:

        “Can I have all of your jewelry?”

      • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

        Are you going to eat that?

        • dld says:

          This was the last thing I said to my beloved grandpa in hospital. I ate his soup (it was a very nice hospital with really good food), we sat a while, then he died. Surrounded by loving family, with all of us picking at his dinner tray. That’s how we do it.

      • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

        Granny, can one phone call change your whole world?

      • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

        Granny, how many shoes did you demand for a beej before you expired?

      • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

        Granny, your true expiration date was DECADES ago. So isn’t this second expiration a happy occasion?

    • Cake Liar says:

      I just came over here to shout and rant about her tweets from the last hour. Absolutely sickening – tweeting something like that, then immediately tweeting about a random online article. This fucker is EVIL.

    • JFA says:

      Let’s see what would she ask?

      – I’m your favorite grandkid right? You can tell me…oh I know it already you don’t have to say it.
      – Am I prettier than Allie?
      -What’s your favorite memory of me?
      – How proud of me are you?
      – Will you tell God “what’s up” for me?
      – When do you think I’ll get married?
      – DO you think I’m as smart as little brother Brit?

    • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

      No, she never does learn:

      “Then, last Tuesday my grandmother and I were at the pancake house for one of our three hour long epic-conversations-disguised-as-meals, when my father called. He was on his way home from work and needed to be picked up from the train. I negotiated back and forth with him, trying to buy more time to run a few errands, then finally agreed and hung up the phone. My Grandmother was staring out into the distance with these huge yearning eyes, and said simply, ‘What I wouldn’t give to be able to pick up my father from the train. Just to talk with him for even 10 or 15 minutes.’

      “That just floored me.”

      http://julia.nonsociety.com/post/322887268

      • Albie Quirky says:

        He needed to be picked up from the train because he had lent his useless daughter his car for her to swan around the suburbs in! She is the most ungrateful ingrate who ever grated on my nerves!

      • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

        What do you want to bet that she still didn’t pick her father up from the train station?

      • solidarity cat says:

        Wait seriously this train story is ridiculous. If your dad is at the train station and needs a ride YOU GO PICK HIM UP. Unbelievable. Also unbelievable that apparently THIS is where I draw the line.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      “Do your Tiny & Cute™ tennis skirts make my raft-ass look big?”
      “I can have these, right? Tell Allie I got dibs! Tell her! NOW!”

    • idiotbox says:

      I am scared to check…did she ACTUALLY TWEET IT OUT FOR EVERYONE TO SEE?

    • New Year New You says:

      On her fakebook:

      “I’m officially in the anger stage of grief.”

      8 people have liked this?

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        Ruh Roh!
        Donkey got left out of the will?

      • Occupy Donkeytown says:

        She lives her whole life in the anger stage of grief.

      • Dr. Gary says:

        Just saw that.

        Also says ’22 minutes ago near Los Angeles’. Does that mean her grandma JUST DIED and she has already flown back to LA???? She’s not staying in Chicago to help her parents with arrangements or the funeral??? God damn.

        How does her own family even tolerate her?

        • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

          She wouldn’t have helped even if she had stayed.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          Her ‘anger-in-grief’ stage was centered entirely on not getting a bereavement fare for leaving?

          #ScratchThatRhetoricalQmark

        • K_Swizz says:

          Location doesn’t mean anything. My computer automatically updates as if I’m in Madison regardless what part of the country I’m in.

          I’m willing to give her the benefit of the doubt and say she’s probably still in Chicago.

          • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

            All her other posts have updated from where she actually was (from Austin when she was at SXSW, from Indio, CA when she was at “Palm Springs” for her birthday, etc…). She’s probably updating from her phone so, no, she’s back in LA already.

          • AFGHANI says:

            Indio/Palm Springs. Another embarassing lie. So sad….

      • JFA says:

        SHE JUST DIED FIVE MINUTES AGO. YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW GRIEF WORKS. Oh Jesus.

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      Gross … if that really is her way of telling the world.

    • fail whale says:

      do i look better in the freshwater pearls or the coldwater pearls? these are coldwater pearls, right?

    • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

      And here I thought that when she brayed “what would you ask a fashion designer at FWNY?” like the imbecile she is it was the worst.

    • New Year New You says:

      Oh you guize, we’ll never get to see Nutty Granny at Christmas again.

      We’ve been in the basement so long people have had catbabies and we’re losing characters to old age.

      RIP Nutty Granny, enjoy The Pancake House in the sky.

    • Shamoolia says:

      THAT. IS. VILE.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        Wait, did she die? She couldn’t have died, she just Tweeted this:

        “I love online lectures (MIT/Stanford, etc), but am overwhelmed by the sheer number of them. Is there a site which ranks & reviews them?”

        And even the most soulless cunt in the world would not have Tweeted that if her Granny just died. I am baffled by the L.A. stamp on her FB, though. She can’t be back there, can she? She only just got to Chicago.

        • Edward R. Burro says:

          Jesus. Why is she such a liar all the time? She loves online college lectures (OMG MIT! OMG Stanford!) like she loves talking about architecture.

          • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

            This.

            Edward, I’ll be back to the Await Your Reply thread in a couple of hours or tomorrow. xoxo

          • Edward R. Burro says:

            Yay! I got a friend completely hooked on it too and he finished it at 3:00 a.m. I’m still thinking about it. It may not be that healthy to wonder so much about fictional characters.

  15. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    The powerful déballage moms will be burning up the wires in Wilmette after every episode. A porn career would probably be less embarrassing, since none of the Republican ladies would admit to watching “that girl” perform.

  16. DSM V: JFA Edition says:

    i will bet 1 drink to the first person who takes the bet that this shit never airs on bravo.
    i hope i lose…

    • Donksers says:

      I’ll be so happy if it doesn’t air, and I’ll also be so happy if it does air. For me, it’s a win either way!

      • pearipathetic donkey says:

        YES! The only loser in this situation is our Donkey.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        SHUT. UP.

        I’ve just clued people in as to why I’ll cave & get cable, & now they have expectations too! Okay, so maybe I alluded to a cult-following drinking game in-the-making, but it could happen, right? RIGHT???

    • Records Custodian says:

      I second that bet. It will never see the light of day, at least with Julia in it.

      She is so grating and unlikeable on camera, and not in the “must see TV” kind of way. Only in the “must change the channel” kind of way. She is repulsive and unwatchable across all demographics.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        I swear to Dog, I think Donkey’s best bet is that Bravo gambles on going forward w/ Miss AssVise based on the already-established community here — chola-cheeka ain’t gonna draw in a whole nuther audience, no matter how much of her GMB inpeltitance she splurges on more Donkistani ‘friends’.

      • Donksers says:

        Ha! She really is so repulsive and unwatchable in a ‘must change the channel’ way. It always cracks me up when a Donkey video is posted here, and a lot of the comments will be things like, “Ewww I could only make it through the first 15 seconds!!” Oh Bravo, what have you done? I’d love to know the behind-the-scenes story of who chose her and why.

  17. Donkey of Perdition says:

    “Walking my parents dog Langdon along Lake Michigan. It seems so small now that I see the Pacific every morning…”

    Foolia can now see around the earth’s curvature and past the horizon. That is all.

    • Donksers says:

      Ha, take that Mom$ers and Dad$ers! Julia has THE PACIFIC OCEAN. You poor slugs are stuck with teeny tiny Lake Michigan.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      Yeah, Lake Michigan looks small. The lake that is so massive and that you can rarely, if ever, see the other side. Fuck off, Muppet Lady.

      • K_Swizz (is a Narcissistic Sparklefart ) says:

        My dad live a block away from the Lake Michigan shoreline.

        You can NOT see Michigan from the coast.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      “…every morning …” she brayed … ??

      Tweets-’til-4:00-Sleeps-’til-Noon
      Tweets-GMB’s-Impending-Death-Me!Me!Me!
      Knows not the meaning of ‘morning / mourning’

    • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

      I bet she can see Russia from her Pacific backyard as well.

  18. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    JuliaAllison I don’t think I could hate @JetBlue any more if I tried. What kind of airline charges $100 to cancel a points ticket w/ a family emergency?
    3 minutes ago

    Special Snowflake Syndrome.

    Now this is the shit I wish Bravo would catch on camera! The braying!

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      PS, the answer is: The kind of airline that wants to stay in business.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      All of them, Donkerina. Complaining about $100 at this moment–$100 Dadsers is going to pay anyway–is the height of crass. Be glad your solipsistic ass had the points and the $100 because there are millions of hardworking, warmhearted people who can’t get together the money they need to make it to be with family members in their last days.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      NEVER. READS. HERE.
      (Except when she does)

      Called it in the last thread that she couldn’t post a pic of a return flight from TX to CA several days forward from now, that she’s had the agenda of uselessly clomping around SXSW 1st before attending to already-existing family matters.

      SOOOOO put upon, Donkey!
      SOOOOO, so brave, Donkey!

      Toilet Julia has her work cut out for her, you smoldering asswipe.

    • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

      I could be mis-remembering, but didn’t she used to love @JetBlue and tweet the name all the time? Maybe they never gave her any perks/miles/official shill rewards, and that’s why she “hates” them. Hate is a strong word Donkey! Oh, and nice bridge-burning again, again.

      • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

        If I were an exec at Bravo or NBC, I would put a muzzle on a donkey

      • pearipathetic donkey says:

        I think she only liked them when her commercials were airing on JetBlue TV. But since JetBlue and her probably decided to parts ways, amicably and totally mutual, she hates them.

    • LetItExplode says:

      She’s only doing tweeting about them to shame them into free bonus points.

      Grifter is as grifter does.

    • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

      This is not even funny anymore, is it? It’s like, we get it, you’re a sociopath, feel free to sit down.

    • juliajane says:

      Just be thankful that you got to spend time with your Grandmother!! So so you had to pay $100, so fucking what.

      • Kissy Face to a Crowd of Crickets says:

        Airlines don’t give a shit about family emergencies. And can you imagine the braying some poor working sap had to listen to about her dying grandmother?

  19. i.just.cant! says:

    i hate tv in general except for the cooking channel. sorry, so fat*

    but yes, so excited for miss advised! when are they going to start showing promos for it?

    *okay so not really fat. hm, i wonder if julia really does believe that all her ‘haterz’ are fat basement dwellers.

  20. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

    Ima plagiarize Staker’s gif from a previous thread:

    Donkey Practicing Grieving Expressions
    [img]http://pics.livejournal.com/pingvinko/pic/001aqyhx[/img]

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      That’s uncool… she’s really grieving her grandmother’s death!

      JuliaAllison If someone wanted to learn about (tech) angel investing … Who would you recommend they talk to / read?
      3 minutes ago

      • X says:

        That inheritance is already burning a hole in her pocket: she’s now an angel tech investor minutes after Grandma’s death. Classy.

      • AFGHANI says:

        Find an entrepreneur with a sideways-scrolling blog. Good place to invest for sure.

      • Little girl pedaling alone in the rain with her own wet cake says:

        Sweet christ she is vile. Is the damn body cold yet? It’s okay, Julia “did the acting thing she’s supposed to do” and now she’s back to her own little world, untouched, unmoved….like an unfeeling shark.

        She. Is. A. Sociopath.

      • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

        Funny, I was just reading about a startup whose angel investors include Randi, Ferriss, K Rose, and Vaynerchuk.

        Nobody will take her phone call? Or is this just another one of her delusional narratives?

        • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

          I think the tweet is basically trying to say, ‘I’M RICH EVERYONE! LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”

          And now she can pretend there is a point to all her flying around and her brunches.

        • AFGHANI says:

          It would be interesting to see if anyone would let her be an angel investor. Because it’s one thing to tolerate her or to use her for connections… and quite another thing to put your money on the line alongside someone else. Yes, yes, I realize Donkey wouldn’t have real, binding input into anything, she’d just be putting on money, but it would suck to be involved in something where people had to listen to her ridiculous suggestions or advice. And it’s not like she’d be putting in much anyway… Not. worth. it.

          • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

            She wouldn’t qualify as an accredited investor under Reg D.

          • AFGHANI says:

            It’s been a couple of years since I took Sec Reg. Under section D, what do you need to have in liquid assets to be a per se sophisticated investor? From what I think I remember, isn’t it a couple hundred K?

          • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

            Net worth of $1M (less primary residence), or income of more than $200k for the last 2 years and the expectation of the same in the current year, or a trust worth over $5M.

            In reality, one would have a tough time joining an angel syndicate with only $200k income or $1M net worth.

          • AFGHANI says:

            Interesting, I was remembering the income requirements. And I thought that the asset threshold required more liquidity. Scary how much I have forgotten in a few years.

          • Donkicles says:

            At least you’ll always have caulk.

      • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

        Can you imagine how pleased her parents must be? Instead of funding, say her own rent money or insurance or living costs or paying her parents back, a Donkey, without a body even being cold yet – is going to use the money her grandmother left her to be an Angel investor.

        God, the stupid.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          She’ll talk them into it being a good way for her to find a rich husband like Granny always wanted for her.

          I am seriously glad I am on anti-emetics right now because otherwise I would never fucking stop throwing up. She is a sick bitch.

          • Already Pantless says:

            Basically, she’s going to buy herself a founder. This time he’s not going to get away!

            Countdown to JAB “wondering aloud” about various Kickstarter projects. . .

      • Donkey of Perdition says:

        Wait till Julia looks up the definition of “spendthrift clause”, she’ll shit bricks.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        YOU ARE FUCKING KIDDING ME HERE WITH THIS BULLSHIT

        That is so ice cold I feel like I’m getting frostbite from my monitor. Holy fuck, it’s like The Bad Seed or something.

        • solidarity cat says:

          Well we have a new incident to list in “the worst things donkey has ever done” poll. I have no words.

        • Prof. F Camping says:

          That is so ice cold I feel like I’m getting frostbite from my monitor

          As Julia the Snow Miser does a happy dance…

          [img]http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-HvQ0hV_Mpo4/Tq9XynOQ9VI/AAAAAAAAAMQ/X7DypDbyieI/s1600/snowmiser.jpg[/img]

      • NonSobriety says:

        SSSF but how do we know for sure NGMB is wealthy at all let alone to the extent of leaving any significant “angel” level sum to not one but each of many grandchildren, children, and whoever else?

        • NonSobriety says:

          Maybe I was absent that day? What’d I miss?

        • solidarity cat says:

          We don’t really know (or do we?) but it’s always been implied. I don’t really think it’s as much as she’d (clearly) like people to believe.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          I would be terribly surprised if she left “angel” money, but she must have been reasonably well-fixed given where she lived, etc., so I imagine there’ll be something for A Donkey and Britt and their three cousins.

          But yeah, the Baughers try to act all 1% but they are pretty ordinary middle-class for Wilmette.

          OKAY FINE I ZILLOWED GMB’S HOUSE AND IT WAS CA. $500K.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        You guys are confusing me. Do we know that she’s died? I can find no evidence anywhere that she’s actually died.

        • solidarity cat says:

          I don’t think she actually died, but she’s clearly not going to be around much longer. Regardless, donkey’s tweets are bizarre and tasteless.

          • solidarity cat says:

            At least that’s my 2 cents…..:)

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            I totally agree. They are vile and she should shut that shit down. But I really don’t think the old dame has passed away yet. We will know, haters, we will know. And it will be epic.

        • Dr. Gary says:

          Why would Julie post ‘I’m officially in the anger stage of grief’ on FB if her grandmother hadn’t died yet?

          • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

            Attention

          • NonSobriety says:

            She’s laying the groundwork/creating buzz for the Sunday Night Special that’s about to air. A teaser, if you will. Getting attention from the “OMG WHATS WRONG???????” reactions.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            I honestly read that as coming to terms with the fact that her Granny is in her final days. You can grieve the impending loss of someone; I bawled at my father’s bedside for weeks.

            But I really cannot believe she’s died less than 24 hours after Donkey got home and now she’s crowd-sourcing about where to read essays and all sort of other pointless shit. She’s not capable of compartmentalizing that way — not when there’s an opportunity for the biggest drama queen known to mankind to lose her shit on Twitter when it actually happens.

            I could be wrong and will stand corrected if I am but HOLY SHIT, if she’s died and Donk is Tweeting the shit she’s been Tweeting, chick needs electro-shock therapy pronto.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            NS: Yes, I believe she’s doing prep work for the full-scale freakout she’s going to have online when it happens in the next few days.

            Again, I could be wrong. But Granny was cracking sad jokes about finding a man for her nightmare of a grand-daughter less than 24 hours ago. And it’s just not like a donkey not to Tweet/Facebook the living shit out of her mental breakdown — remember Pancakes. (Remember the Alamo!)

            I suppose it’s possible her parents banned it but I just think she’d have gone totally dark if they’d done that, not be Tweeting mindless pap about other stuff. It would make her look heartless and God knows she is SO. NICE. And feels SO. MUCH.

          • Dr. Gary says:

            @NonSobriety

            What’s the ‘Sunday Night Special’?

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            The actual death of Granny, I am assuming. Right now she’s just airing promo spots.

      • bitchface says:

        Michael Arrington, Paul Carr and Meghan Asha, duh

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      SIDE NOTE: I know the sweaty juicy sweat shirt up yonder says “TUMS”, but anyone else notice that it’s sorta not unlike the “I WAS INSIDE” hoofer below?

    • Donkeycam Now! says:

      U rang?

  21. Little girl pedaling alone in the rain with her own wet cake says:

    How dare she whine about a $100 charge to fly home to visit her dying “beloved” grandmother. How much did she spend on fucking stripper whore boots for Burning (Bridges) Man? Probably three times that.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if Donkey pulled the plug herself, just to make sure Granny didn’t pull through and make her wait longer for that CASH MONAY!!!!

    • JFA says:

      It’s THE PRINCIPLE. They should be ASHAMED of themselves! Her granny just died! Don’t they know who she is? She has 20K twitter followers! She will BURY THEM.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      Wouldn’t it be money you’d be happy to spend to go see your beloved Granny in her dying days? You’re really going to publicly whinge about a lousy 100 bucks??

      She is just so off. There is something so wrong with her.

      • Dyspeptic says:

        Yeah, wouldn’t you be like all “only a hundred bucks? Thank god!”

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          She is so goddamned cheap. I bet she’s a lousy tipper.

          And yet she’s the worst kind of cheap. Cheap when it involves opening up her wallet. But motherfucking extravagant when she’s demanding other people open their wallets for her.

  22. She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

    I’m still having a hard time believing that Bravo is going to air her. I mean, I know that this is the network that made a star out of Danielle Staub, but, still, I’ll believe it when the show hits air.

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      They’ll air it. Do I think it will be good? No. I think the biggest mistake they made is not having all girls in the same city. There will be no bitchy fights because Bald Julia knows Big Julia is her meal ticket.

      So I think the show will be a snooze-fest except for us and it will die a quick death.,

    • AFGHANI says:

      They used Danielle Staub, they didn’t make her a star. She’s a hated person who now has a permanently dented reputation. She got a very fleeting time in the sun, where she was canon fodder, and now her “career” is over and she’ll be reduced to perma-grifting for the rest of her life.

      Sounds perfect for A Donkey.

      • boredm says:

        I would guess that the show will be something like NYC Prep…air seven episodes, get a bit of attention at the time, and then just disappear. That show was also filled with useless, delusional, unattractive characters, so this doesn’t really surprise me at all.

        I’m not going to lie, as much as I want to see this show air (because I love horrible reality TV, and even moreso when there are pathetic and tragic characters on the show) I still would much rather see JA’s wedding. I was really hoping with Bravo’s backing, she could find some guy to get hitched. That will forever be the ultimate craze show in my mind, and it gives me the sads that I will probably never see it happen.

  23. I Really Can't. says:

    I cannot even take these dead grandma tweets. As someone who has suffered some huge family losses, I really try not to judge other people’s grief. I get that some people find comfort vocalizing their grief publicly on Twitter/Facebook/etc. I don’t judge Julia for going to SXSW while her grandmother was sick. You never know what’s going on within family dynamics, and some sick people want those around them to go on with life and with traveling and things like that. Grief can hit people hard and in unexpected ways, and I totally understand how someone can be an asshole while they’re grieving. Grieving fucking sucks.

    THAT SAID… holy shit, Julia. Really? Using your grandmother’s death to crowd source story ideas? Using your grandmother’s death to get cash from JetBlue? Tossing in a death tweet or two in between sucking up to whoever it is you’re sucking up to this week? If this were a normal person doing this, I would think man, this person is going through a tough time and they’re really going to regret being so publicly flippant (and greedy) about this terrible time in their life. But the sad thing is that I really don’t think Julia will even give it a second thought. I’m so torn between being repulsed by and being sad for her, because I really don’t think she’s ever felt any emotion beyond a very shallow, superficial level. Ugh.

    • AFGHANI says:

      On one hand, she talks about wanting $100 back from Jet Blue.

      On the other, she asks for advice about angel investing in tech companies.

      It’s perfectly incongruent and yet, it really shows what a nutcase she is.

      • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

        Also, how is her time divided on these things when her poor father is grieving the death of his mother?

        She is such a cunt.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      DID SHE DIE??? WHERE ARE YOU GUYS GETTING THIS??

      • Donksers says:

        I’m not sure, but I think the idea that NGMB has died came from Julia’s tweet asking what people wish they had asked their late grandparent.

        • CDB says:

          yes and if she has not passed it was the worst example of crowd sourcing in the history of the universe

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          But that didn’t mean she’d died. Neither does the grief FB status. I am no Donkey defender, but I read both of those as her coming to grips with the inevitability that Granny is dying soon.

          I really don’t think she’s died. Donkey’s Twitter stream would be blowing up in a ridiculous display of public sympathy-seeking and cyber-wailing it if was. It will go on for days.

          Come now, we know her better than this.

      • Dr. Gary says:

        This tweet made it sound like she had died:

        @JuliaAllison: What do you wish you could have asked your late grandparent?

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          Nah, she’s preparing. She’s spending time with Granny and asking others what they asked their dying Grannys because she’s too stupid and devoid of a soul to have organic thoughts and curiosities about anything or anyone that doesn’t involve her and her problems.

          That’s not the way she’s going to announce to the world that she is now hosting a gargantuan pity party. She is going to lose her shit and it will go on for days and days. There may even be video of her sobbing into the camera.

          • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

            Let’s hope so!

          • pearipathetic donkey says:

            I agree. Remember how she cries for days on end whenever one of her “relationships” ends. I can only imagine the drama when NGMB goes.

          • Dr. Gary says:

            I should have known it was just her shitty writing. Would have been less confusing if she’d said ‘grandparent’ instead of ‘late grandparent’.

          • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

            Tots agreed, Jacy.

            BTW, Donkey, if I got a chance to talk with my late grandfather who died when I was 15 years old: I’d ask him about his childhood in a small-ish Slovak town and how it felt to move to the “big city” of Prague in the 1930s. I’d ask him about the WW2 events where he earned the medals he got after the war. I’d ask him about the time he spent in Nazi prison. I’d ask him about his mother and sister who were killed in gas chambers, and about his estranged-for-about-20-years brother who lived in Australia. I’d ask him what made him choose oncology for his vocation, seeing as back in the 1940s-50s it was even more of a dismal field than it is now. I’d ask him about the two years he lived and worked in Iraq, and about the shorter periods of time he spent in Amsterdam and in Texas. I’d ask him about the Soviet invasion in 1968 and its aftermath that was a breaking point (one of them) in his life. And I’d ask him about his two illegitimate daughters that he allegedly had with two different married women whose husbands apparently never found out that they were not the real fathers. We know they exist, but we don’t know their names or anything else, and my mother would like to learn more about her half-sisters.

            Hope that helps! Oh wait, I forgot that you aren’t interested in other people. My bad. 🙂

        • ks says:

          That question makes zero sense to ask AFTER she died. since the grandparent wouldn’t be able to answer. Since her brain can think of nothing but herself, she is asking Twitter for a way to chit-chat with Granny Bags to make it seem like she gives a shit and to help pass the time.

          I almost feel sorry for her being a sociopath right now. She knows she should feel something, but is physically unable.

  24. AFGHANI says:

    If Nutty Grandma Moneybags really did pass away (RIP) and Julia really does get, say, $100k, is this the point where Dadster cuts Donkey off? If so, things could get really funny as Julia portrays herself as this big spender, flying around the country, etc. But then, at the same time, complains about every extra charge or unexpected expense, because she’s looking at that 100k dwindle down over time without a reasonable expectation that Dadster will just cut a check to cover things…

    • solidarity cat says:

      Yes, this is going to sound snooty, but 100K certainly won’t set a donkey up for life.

      • AFGHANI says:

        With her lifestyle, it would last less than 2 years.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          Less than two years???
          UNDERSTATEMENT!

          My nephew (in-law) tells the story of blowing through $80k in a few short months & having the grand-daddy of epiphanies when he found himself sneaking onto his parents backyard to sleep on their patio because he couldn’t keep a roof over his head … & he’s fucking brilliant, compared to La Donk.

          4-6 months, tops, & she’s ham-wrestling Raul for Dad$er’s condo.

          • CurlingIronsAtDawn says:

            “4-6 months, tops, & she’s ham-wrestling Raul for Dad$er’s condo.”

            Dear Lord, Brayella, that is funny. I’ve been laughing for a good minute, out loud, complete with snorting here in the dark of the living room while everyone sleeps.

          • Already Pantless says:

            People who have never handled a lot of money and suddenly come into a great amount of it usually lose it in extraordinary ways that leave them worse off than if they’d never had it.

            Money for nothing is trouble (trouble right here in Donkey City).

          • Julia's Too Small Tutu says:

            I have a cousin who blew threw the nearly 1.5 million dollars he received in a trust in less than two years while trying to keep up with his wealthy friends in college. Unlike the Donk, he got his shit together and now makes a great living in reality television.

    • Effing Ineffably Un-Effable says:

      Oddly… I had the same thought last night. I wouldn’t be surprised, but that clan is enabler central…

    • Shamoolia says:

      Would she really even get close to 110k? There are multiple children and grandchildren to divide up the estate. She’ll probably get a “small” 10K tax free gift, if anything.

  25. Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

    JetBlue tells her rules is rules..

    In reply to Julia Allison
    1h JetBlue Airways ‏ @JetBlue
    @JuliaAllison Sorry to hear. Per our fare rules, all nonrefundable fares are subject to a change fee…

    JetBlue Airways ‏ @JetBlue
    @JuliaAllison …If you still have questions, please don’t hesitate to call and speak with one of our TrueBlue agents.

    • AFGHANI says:

      Just gained respect for JetBlue. At least it seems they enforce their rules equally. When rules are not enforced or are selectively altered for whiners, it undermines the confidence the average person can have in your brand.

      • Donksers says:

        I agree. I can’t stand it when businesses cave in to her demands or go along with her serial rule-breaking. Didn’t she used to send hate tweets to United?

    • Dr. Gary says:

      Thank God. I am so sick of people/companies giving in to her demands and tantrums.

  26. Pink Princess says:

    Delurking here….I have been a longtime reader but have never commented because you cat people are hilarious, insightful and come up with the funniest stuff ever–never felt a need to add my two cents.

    But today? This fat ass bitch hit a new low. I have a grandma that is amazing–she is kind, caring, generous (with time & love not just money) and overall a fabulous woman. I adore her and have taken care of her since I was 18 years old. I can not even begin to to imagine how anyone (even Julia) could treat a grandparent’s death in the cruel and vile way that she has. I truly hope her grandmother had a peaceful passing. She deserves that–all human beings do.

    And Julia? Since you NEVER read here? FUCK YOU. You deserve each and every horrible thing that happens to you, you vile bitch.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Yay, I hope you and your grandmother have many more happy years together. Thank you (seriously) for reminding me how people can love.

      I miss both of my grandmothers a lot, especially my dad’s mum who was a completely adorable lady (as played by Dame Peggy Ashcroft or June Whitfield, more or less), and who took care of us when our own mum was ill and after she died.

      I am genuinely sad at the passing of NGMB, because despite the less-than-charming racism, sexism, and materialism we heard about from A Donkey (and from NGMB’s own Letters to the Editor, etc.) I admire that she lived a long life on her own terms and with her own sense of style. I hope her end was gentle, and that her family finds solace in their memories of her.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        And I really do hope it brought her joy to have Britt and Donkey (and presumably at least some of her other grandchildren) with her at the end.

        (For myself, if I saw A Donkey walk into my hospital room, I would just keep mashing the morphine pump button praying for the sweet embrace of death, but I can only imagine NGMB knew and remembered her better times.)

        This really is making me sad and reminding me of being with my dad in his last days. I would have sympathy for JAB if I thought she was actually capable of feeling grief.

    • THE MOST DELICIOUS VEGGIE BURGER IN THE LAND says:

      I can remember going with my Mother to visit my Grandmother when she was in the hospital, when she thought I was my Mom and my Mom was her sister, when she would just make noises and when she didn’t know who we were. And it’s haunting and heartbreaking and I miss the woman that was my REAL Grandmother so much, all the time, even three years later.

      For Julia to trivialize this moment makes me hate her so very much. If NGMB has died and JFA immediately wrote it off and started tweeting about her mundane concerns over her fake dreams then I just… I cannot. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about how badly I wish my Grandmother were lucid enough to meet my catfriend and I habe started drinking Manhattans solely because that was her drink. I miss her SO much.

      And my Mother, god, that was heartbreaking to watch her lose her mother so slowly and know there was NOTHING I could do to make it stop hurting. While I know the Baugher family isn’t big on feelings in general, I cannot believe that a child watching their parent lose a parent would feel no emotion. Not even Donkey.

      What a fucking sociopath.

  27. Tom Brady says:

    I have to come out from commenting retirement for this.

    Hours or possibly minutes after her grandmother’s death, she simply can’t resist twittering to the world that she now has her inheritance and is going to play at being an angel investor. She must realize on some level this is beyond the pale, and yet she can’t resist doing it. Or even delay doing it.

    Bravo, you’ve picked your villain wisely.

    • JFA says:

      This shit is beyond the pale. I felt slightly guilty today commenting on these posts…but what is it gonna do, hurt her feelings? She fucking has none. Who posts about AIRLINES five minutes after their granny croaks? WHO?! WHO CARES ABOUT $100 AT THAT TIME.

      Cunt. It’s chilling what a piece of shit she is.

    • KashMoney says:

      was that about “being” an angel investor or about “finding” one? she could be looking for new fools to grift.

      • Dr. Gary says:

        Good point. This is what she tweeted:

        @JuliaAllison: If someone wanted to learn about (tech) angel investing … Who would you recommend they talk to / read?

        The timing is unseemly, considering her grandmother is on death’s door or has just passed away.

      • Prof. F Camping says:

        Hmm…perhaps her friend Greasy, who up until a few months ago was a tech investor, could help her????

        • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

          Have she and Greasy had another fallout? They are still FB friends but he’s not following her on Twitter (as far as I can see… sometimes my computer will screw things up).

          Anyone?

        • New Year New You says:

          Perhaps her angel investor friend Meagan Marks, and chicken-cake founder, could help her.

          • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

            I think a Donkey wants to BE Meagan Marks… travel, have fuck you money, be in the tech inner circle, etc.

          • Dr. Gary says:

            @Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears

            and have A MAN aka WALLET

  28. CDB says:

    JAB… This is for you you vile slug[img]http://i1231.photobucket.com/albums/ee516/bobbaer1/catface.gif[/img]

    • solidarity cat says:

      Oooh! Can I play too?? Donkey,

      [img]http://blog.grandeur-guild.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/YouMakeKittyAngry.jpg[/img]

    • Donksers says:

      How can such a violent cat look so cute?

      • CDB says:

        I don’t know , this guy looks cute too[img]http://i1231.photobucket.com/albums/ee516/bobbaer1/confusedkitty.jpg[/img]

      • solidarity cat says:

        Sometimes it’s the cute ones, you know?

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          There is the cutest cat in my ‘hood and he’s an evil fucking asshole. Beats the shit out of all the other cats, even though he’s way smaller. My one cat comes in with wounds all over his head, and the other one will no longer go out at all anymore because he’s so terrified of him. When I once shooed him off my neighbor’s cat, a sweet little female whom he had pinned down and was kicking the shit out of, he lunged at my hand and left a big scratch. If you approach him at all, he stands his ground and starts yowling and growling at you. I fucking hate him and want to do what Walter did to the neighbor’s cat in Freedom.

          And yet he is ridiculously cute.

  29. Dr. Gary says:

    Well done, CDB!

  30. ChetBizzaro says:

    I just found this website. I’ve been hating JA for years, it’s nice to find like minded people.

    • CDB says:

      Welcome
      Let’s open a fresh box of Franzia and a new bag of cheetos and toast ChetBizarro

    • Donksers says:

      I wonder how many other JA haters are out there wandering around in the wilderness, not knowing that RBD is here for them.

    • solidarity cat says:

      Cheers, ChetBizzaro.

      [img]http://www.bunnycute.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/drunk-cat.jpg[/img]

    • monster (Single and Mingle) says:

      You have a lot of work to do to catch up with the class, though.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      Are you a cousin of hers, Chet?
      Don’t answer, no need; we get it.
      Welcome, to the cheetoh side ….

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      Well hello sailor. May I recommend the Year in Review posts? They’re always eye-opening.

      • ChetBizzaro says:

        Thanks, I just spent an hour and a half reading the entire glossary and skimmed many of the accompanying links.

        • ChetBizzaro says:

          She’s way more terrible than I ever imagined. It’s going to get really interesting now that her grandmother passed away and she stands to inherit FU money. This was a good time to find this site. And when compound rebloggingdonk with her twitter and nonsociety bullshit, it’s just an amazing train wreck, total shit show.

        • Delurked says:

          If you don’t mind me asking, how did you find the site? I’m just curious how new people end up here. Personally, it’s been so long I don’t even remember…

          • ChetBizzaro says:

            The NY Post op-ed she wrote got her on a bunch of blogs. Someone posted a link to this site in the comments section on Gothamist.com. I’ve been hating on her since the [redacted] days.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            Welcome aboard!

  31. Little girl pedaling alone in the rain with her own wet cake says:

    If she were a fictional character, I’d be marveling at how the writers manged to take her to a new low after so much other disgusting behavior.

    Maybe Nanners didn’t kick the bucket? That would have to be the only explanation, since now she’s flitting on about online lectures (at Stanford and MIT, lol!).

    She is teh smartz!

    • Dr. Gary says:

      Every time she hits a new low, I think no way she can go lower than this. THIS is the lowest of lows. THIS is it.

      But then she finds some new way to out-low her last low. Like now.

    • tonyamichaela says:

      JuliaAllison: I love online lectures (MIT/Stanford, etc), but am overwhelmed by the sheer number of them. Is there a site which ranks & reviews them?

      She can namedrop MIT and Stanford, but she still doesn’t know the difference between that and which! You would think that at a bare minimum, she would have learned a basic grammar concept from this website, since she’ll never take advantage of all the free, good advice on how to get her shit together.

  32. darling dearest says:

    I was at target today and thought about getting a condolences card for the baughers when I remembered OH WAIT I don’t *actually* know them.

    • Jordache and the Pelts says:

      Awright, this has been where I have been drawing the line…. Julia has been behaving and tweeting horribly about her grandmother’s circumstances. Honestly, I doubt Julia even comprehends what “hospice” really means and she way well be throwing around the term haphazardly as she is has proven herself to scream malapropisms and second hand new age mumbo-jumbo on her twitter. This is a difficult time for her family, and her grandmother’s inferred politics aside (and I do think we should leave this woman alone), they didn’t ask for a beast like Julia and deserve some respect and privacy. Also I’m sure Julia is going through some pain and dealing with it the best (most obnoxious) way she knows how. Julia is a tacky, self-involved, lazy, and ultimately self-defeating mess who is determined to get her shit splayed everywhere and is a monster. I don’t think her family asked for that and deserves the scrutiny from a reblogging site, especially during this difficult time. Note: neither Grandma nor any of the Baughers have blogs and have been tramping it at (maybe) Bravo SXSW.
      Before I get off my pedestal, I went through two plus years of hospice with my grandmother (my folks were posted overseas so I assumed responsibility slightly after my – gasp -expiration date) so Julia’s dramatics may well be premature. I won’t get into how much my grandmother meant to me and certainly won’t tweet about it. Julia is probably going through her own NPD version of a hard time and certainly things are rough for the Baughers. At any rate, I’m uncomfortable with all the Granny Moneybags convo in this forum right now sorry.

      • Already Pantless says:

        I definitely feel where you’re coming from, but I also think that her grandmother will never see this content, which only exists as a response to what her grandonkey is posting online.

        And if it causes other family members additional grief, I feel they should have put a lock on it before it even started. Not to say that they deserve it, just that it wouldn’t exist if we didn’t know these things we shouldn’t know. I feel overall the convo has been mostly about donkey, anyway.

        If I was posting stupid shit about personal family matter, against their wishes, I’d probably be the first 41-year-old ever to be put up for adoption.

        • Orwell-Style Cyberpolice Force says:

          But you didn’t feel that way about discussing the “I was inside” thing relating to Robin’s rape?

          I am confident that Petey and Robin stay away from this blog. Unwisely so because it might give them some insight to know that their donkey daughter manages to draw such ire.

  33. moochmonkey says:

    OT: she keeps megatits tweet as a top tweet? What’s that about?

  34. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    JuliaAllison “Just write shit. Just write anything.” – wisdom on book authorship from my little brother
    10 minutes ago

    Oh, boy. Donkey is sure having delusions of grandeur.

    • New Year New You says:

      Oh Donkey you write shit every time you open your laptop, shouldn’t be that hard for you.

      • Prof. F Camping says:

        seriously. decoding brother britt: “just write shit. it’s what you do anyway”

        • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

          There’s such an exasperation to what he said. He knows she’s not going to bother doing it so why waste time giving her advice?

    • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

      “Just write shit. Just write anything. And why don’t you go inside and get started right now.”

    • Dr. Gary says:

      Julie: “I’m thinking about writing a book. Maybe my memoirs. What should I write about, Britt? Britt? Britt? Britt? What do you think, Britt? Are you even listening to me? I said I want to write a book. What should it be about? Britt? Hey, Britt? What should my book be about? Huh? What do you think? What should I write about? Britt. Britt. Britt.”

      Britt: “Just write shit. Just write anything.”

      • New Year New You says:

        I CANNOT wait for the Donkey Memoirs which you know she will publish at some point, although she will have to get someone else to write that shit for her.

        And I would also like to see A Donkey’s Tail/Tale: The Unauthorised Account.

      • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

        Encouraged by the overwhelming positive response in the blogosphere to her article in Sunday’s NY Post, a whole new career opens before Julia’s eyes.

    • The Manta says:

      It’s actually good advice. A true writer writes. It’s what they do.

      Hunter S. Thompson manually typed out ‘The Great Gatsby’ and ‘A Farewell To Arms’ just to know the feeling of writing a great novel.

      Donk here struggled shitting out a 500 word puff piece syndicated column. The longest piece of writing I’ve ever seen from her was an ad for a freaking intern!

  35. RRR says:

    Sigh.

    It’s a mistake for me to come back here, but I think I should chime in.

    I don’t think Julia’s behavior is indicative necessarily of a lack of feeling where her grandmother is concerned.

    I lost a person very close to me back in my bad old days and I am ashamed to say that my behavior, far from showing decorum and a withdrawal from the vulgarities of everyday life, instead plunged wholeheartedly into them. I became more like myself only worse–horseplay and girlie stupidity, hectic merriment and week-long all-nighters. I only later realized that I was trying to normalize the situation–“I can’t lose this person, because that would change my life and my life is IN MY CONTROL.” Well, my life was not in my control and I did lose that person and to this day I feel as if I am never going to properly be able to let them go with the dignity that they deserved because there is always that selfish corner of me saying “they are not gone. They can’t be. They wouldn’t do that to me. They wouldn’t do that to anyone.” It was not something they did. It was something that happened. But mental knowledge of that hasn’t lessened the guilt and the fear of the original impluse.

    In other words, I think that Julia’s problems are feeding her attempt to deny an oncoming death because that, like everything else, forces her to examine her problems by herself–problems she can’t admit she has.

    Which is sick. But not fun. And not without pain based on the absense of a person that one looked to for support.

    • bitchface says:

      why is it a mistake to come here but ok to post on the idiots covered in GOMI?

      make-o no sense-o

      • RRR says:

        If you don’t understand that there is no point in explaining.

      • Probably because RRR sees herself in Julia whereas she’d never be caught dead being as tacky as Doos or KERF.

        • RRR says:

          You know me so well. 🙂

          • RRR says:

            Good God I just realized that I signed off with a Julia Allison-style happy face.

            AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

        • AFGHANI says:

          As tacky as Julia is, there are levels of tacky-ness beneath A Donkey. KERF and Messica are perfect examples. Julia is different largely because she had this 2-3 year run where she could’ve had some mainstream visibility if she’d listed to advice and played her cards correctly. Instead, her former agent is knocking up her haters and she’s tweeting about using her inheritance for angel investing. Howfuck?

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      I should chime in ….
      I lost a person …
      I am ashamed to say …
      I became more like …
      I only later realized …
      I was trying to …

      Around these here parts, we have this sayin’, pahdner, & it goes like this:

      #DoNotInternalizeRBDsnark!NoOneIsTalkingAboutYouExceptYOU!

      • RRR says:

        Did I mention it was a mistake to come back?

        Why…I believe I did.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          To be fair / fare / fayer ….
          Why yes, yes, you did mention a lot.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            Indeed.

            Would you like me to delete your comments for the terrible, profound, life-altering mistake you have made by commenting anonymously on a snark site so you can scurry back and comment anonymously on other snark sites with a clean conscience?

          • RRR says:

            Hi Jacy!

            Nah, I was basically posting fallover drunk and had a weepy moment.

            No worries.

            My not wanting to come back here has nothing to do with you guys–it’s just that this place is addictive on the one hand…and on the other I also find Julia pretty depressing these days rather than funny. Tucker does seem to have gone off in a puff of smoke so there’s that.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            Peace out.

        • CDB says:

          well I for one miss you Miss Revenge.

          • RRR says:

            Oh Charming something that begins with “D” Ro-bear…

            Hold me in your fuzzy, machine-gun totin’ kitty arms.

            /batts eyelashes seductively

            /picture falls off wall

          • CDB says:

            [img]http://i1231.photobucket.com/albums/ee516/bobbaer1/LOL81.gif[/img]

          • RRR says:

            Lower….lower….no, higher now….no, lower…for God’s sake, it’s right there…lower! No, now higher!

            Jesus Christ, have you never eaten a Blow Pop?

        • Dr. Gary says:

          When you preface it with this:

          ‘Sigh.

          It’s a mistake for me to come back here, but I think I should chime in.’

          It comes off as sort of Drama Queen-ish. So don’t be surprised if you get some eyerolls and snarky replies.

          Just sayin’

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      Do not internalize the snark. And if it’s a terrible mistake for you to come here, a tip: don’t. Even though I agree with whoever else pointed out that it’s odd to post prolifically on one snark site but behave like you’ve entered Nazi Germany on another. Such JA-ish histrionics!

      • Scooby Don't says:

        I know…it’s not like we’re Irish for God’s sake.

      • RRR says:

        BTW–I just reread my comment, and I failed to see the bit where “It’s a mistake to come back here” automatically means “because you are all subhuman trolls who smell of wee.” Normally I have no hesitation in pointing such details out, as you well know.

        I meant it simply because I’m trying to cut back on ALL my board activity as I’m attempting to change jobs and intended no criticism. Also, I was extremely depressed last night and was reminded of a lousy time in my life and realize that Julia reminds me of that time more than I need to be reminded of it and I am pretty sure this sentence is still in English near thing though. I kind of thought that much was clear although rereading it I guess not still writing English woo hangover.

        Anyway, hope that clears it up. Love the Alan Rickman gif. Am having dinner with him next week. Thus the irony.

        • AFGHANI says:

          I totally get wanting to cut back on my “hater” blog reading/posting but it provides a venue to discuss aspects of human behavior I find intriguing and to say things I would never say in real life without having to worry what some other random catperson/hater thinks. Because blogs are not real life, at least not to me. So it’s quite the refuge. This place is far more mild than most and, while Julia is unique in her depravity, people like MckMama, KERF, CecilyK and (insert long list here) provide plenty of laughs too.

          The weirdest part is, we get to watch them make utter fools and fuck up their lives with stress and discord, but they persist because they think they are “making it”. Maybe if I’d seen filler-faced Julia get auctioned off to Tucker Max who just made a rape “joke” I would feel differently. RRR, it probably shows that you’re a good person if you feel bad for Julia or other dumbass bloggers. But I don’t.

          • RRR says:

            Yes, that night with Tucker had me in the dumps for days. Ugh yuck sleazy get it off.

            I love the line in “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf” where George says of his insult-slinging with Martha “we are…simply walking what’s left of our wits.” Which is pretty much how I feel about my contributions of late.

            I’m basically simply a rude bitch who can’t resist adding insult to injury, but I think sites like GOMI and RD have amazing writing on them (in them?) and are fascinating places to bounce ideas and experiences off the darker corners of the human spirit. Thus my attempt to (sniff) share my soul (boo-hoo) which met with such savage rebuttal (world’s smallest violin pumps out a note here). Also, I am still drink.

            /blows nose in handkerchief

            /unfolds handkerchief and examines snot

          • CDB says:

            My high school spanish teacher used to unfold her handkerchief to see if her snot was green or not. It was so disgusting. And spanish class was just before lunch. You have triggered long forgotten memories. Thank you so much.

          • RRR says:

            I live to please, it seems.

          • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

            RRR, feel free to relax. I wish you’d comment regularly, the way I see it, one doesn’t even have to pay much attention to the donkey itself to have fun here. *creepy hug*

          • RRR says:

            Helena! Wuv back to you, sweetie!

            I have decided to wuv people. Wuv is much better than real love. Non-stick, for one thing.

            Look for Spring Fresh Wuv in finer stores near you!

          • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

            I tots agree. Wuw beats real love to the ground, then kicks it while it’s down.

          • Helena (Had To Bring Her Own Fish) says:

            I meant wuv, obviously. I don’t know what wuw is. It sounds dirty and I’m pretty sure it violates some part of Leviticus.

        • Orwell-Style Cyberpolice Force says:

          RRR, nothing against you and I totally hear you about the fact that some misinterpreted the “it was a mistake to come back here” comment, but I’m weirded out by your constant references to people who are OMG SO IMPORTANT. It’s odd for someone anonymously posting on a snark blog to be such a name-dropper.

          Also, I wouldn’t dare reveal who I’m going to dinner with next week on here or GOMI, especially if I’m trying to change careers? Did the museum board member find our blog amusing when you claimed he found this blog?

          I guess I’ll take it all pretty lightly, though. You’re one of the only posters here who’ve cared enough to craft an personality (or persona, rather), so I assume it’s not real.

          • RRR says:

            Nah, I’m just helping out at a benefit where he is appearing. We will be having dinner 5,000,000 chairs away from each other. Still, I’m looking forward to it as I think he’s just so dreamy.

            Mr. Museum Board was NOT amused. But I think that had more to do with him realizing what a complete fool he appeared to be that night.

          • Orwell-Style Cyberpolice Force says:

            Okay, so technically you are “having dinner” with Alan Rickman next week — as in, you are simultaneously eating while he is eating at a benefit with hundreds of other people.

            Whatevs. I just think you’re weird, but mostly in a good way. And I, for one, would welcome you and your Anthony Trollope references back with open arms.

            Cheers!

          • RRR says:

            Jeez, I feel like I should run a systems check on my Obvious Bullshit Output.

    • JFA says:

      “I don’t think Julia’s behavior is indicative necessarily of a lack of feeling where her grandmother is concerned.”

      If she were a normal feeling person I might agree with you. Grief can make people act weird or whatever. But she isn’t normal – she’s a sociopath. I think most of us have watched her behavior long enough to make this armchair diagnosis.

      You know who else besides sociopaths would act this way? 12 year olds.

  36. Pink Princess says:

    Jacy was right…

    From her FB:

    Julia Allison My grandmother is in the hospital, and it’s not looking good.
    39 minutes ago

    So her grandmother has not passed yet and we have yet to see how low she can really go

    • Prof. F Camping says:

      how low can you go donkey?!

      [img]http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-6EzaNmfD-J8/TejkeYr8ZzI/AAAAAAAAMJY/8aNKLyU6kLY/s1600/ranch_limbo.gif[/img]

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      Jacy is always right. It’s pretty amazing. (Sincere compliment is sincere!)

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        She’s just so easy to read. It’s not that I’m always right, it’s that she’s always so obvious.

        • Ass Baughers Syndrome says:

          Jacy, are you one of Donk’s inner circle? You seemed so certain that Granny hadn’t passed yet, it made my spidey senses tingle.

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            No, although I hear from people in her “inner circle” on occasion. I just have my PhD in Donkology. This one was a no-brainer, however. There was NO WAY Donk was not going to lose her shit all over Twitter and FB if Granny had actually passed. She’s already making a melodramatic ass of herself and the poor old lady lives and breathes.

    • Donksers says:

      Burning Man whackjob, Annie Lalla, responded to Donkey’s FB grief/anger comment with this:

      “let’s tawk…anger is gold mine, i want to make sure you excavate as much as possible while you’re here. xoA
      2 hours ago”

      Ew.

      • Prof. F Camping says:

        [img]http://i.imgur.com/b2NZ3.jpg[/img]

      • CurlingIronsAtDawn says:

        Ew is right. Why are excavating human anything? It sounds so, well, ew.

      • So Blessed. says:

        “Excavate,” my ass. If and when Donk-o can examine this won’t be in time for Annie’s Seasonal Spiritual Grift Orgy and Harvest.

        The process of loss is an actual process as opposed to something one experiences as a Birthday, a Relationship, a Job Opportunity passing. If fuckstick actually loses someone important to her she won’t be able to excavate jack shit until much later. Fuck her and fuck you to the vultures already circling.

        I have empathy as far as Donk doesn’t know how to deal with Real Life Experiences but this is nauseating. “My grandma (does that sound casual enough?)/Grandmother/grandmother is in the hospital (does hospice sound more dire?) Please email me at fuckstick@donkey.biz or reply using Twitter with any questions I should ask before she croaks.”

        Excuse all the fucks given; I am grossed out. I am reaching to find even the dark humor in this and the added shaman Facebook friend’s comment she will no doubt leave on her page makes it worse.

        I understand someone’s seemingly sudden illness accelerated to maybe passing can leave you angry, guilty, sad-as-hell, frustrated, etc. I don’t know if grief fits until you actually lose the person as in the words of the ashram, a few good poets and no doubt, Donkey’s wing-ding friends, you should be in the moment. But that emoting is better left offline. I think a simple radio silence would be fine. The world will not stop if Julia stopped Tweets and Facebook posts.

        #TeamFeistyGrannyMoneyBags all the way. If she passes, I hope Dumb Donkey will have the decorum to wait at least an hour to Tweet for consolation.

        Until then, she’s consoling herself with 140-charcter Tweetises on how she will bravely endure:
        ***Wish I could be there. Miss you, Jules! RT @JuliaPriceMusic: Remember my #SXSW showcase is tomorrow at noon! http://fb.me/MOZCYBA6
        ***@wendyrama @jetblue – yeah, I’m done with @Jetblue after this. I won’t fly them unless absolutely necessary.
        ***@JetBlue – it was with my frequent flier points. Other airlines don’t charge to put the points BACK in my account if I cancel the flight.
        ***My brother spent the last hour explaining his MIT phd dissertation, “Graphene Nano Electro Mechanical Resonators.” I feel stupid.
        ***”Just write shit. Just write anything.” – wisdom on book authorship from my little brother

      • Scooby Don't says:

        Translation: “Money? You’re coming into money you say? Let me help you spend it on some excellent courses my new husband and I are just putting together on helping Donkeys deal with grief. Yes you’ll get the special friends and burros rate”
        I love it when grifters grift other grifters.

      • ChetBizzaro says:

        I just cringed so hard I sprained my neck.

      • Already Pantless says:

        “Let’s gaze the shit out of our navels.”

    • So Blessed. says:

      “It’s not looking good”–but to continue my OMG positive outlook and life changes graced by the absolute beauty of regularly waking up by the Pacific Ocean as opposed to Lake Michigan, yo (Pacify 4eva) I am crowdsourcing angel investing and #thingsyouwishedyouaskedpeopleincasetheydiebefore you canvimeoit.
      So Vom.

    • darling dearest says:

      so she was in a hospice (there was a hospice nurse) and then went to the hospital? I’m confused.

      • AFGHANI says:

        Julia doesn’t care about facts, she’ll lie about the smallest and most trivial things. And she probably thought hospice sounded sophisticated/genteel/high status?

      • OMGPearskank says:

        Julia probably doesn’t know the difference.

      • Shamoolia says:

        I think Julia is too stupid to know the difference.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        Probably moved to an annex or extension of hospital that is specifically hospice, I’m guessing …

  37. juliapublicist says:

    I feel so completely out of the loop right now having been lost in that attack on my ADD called SXSW. What the hell is going on?

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      A brief roundup:

      Granny’s sick. Donk left SXSW and publicly moaned about a. having to go back and then b. having to spend the $100 fee to rebook her flight or some such fucking thing.

      She crowd-sourced on Twitter re: questions to ask a dying grandparent. And also put up a FB status about grief. This lead to speculation Granny had in fact died. She has not. Donkey is gross.

      RRR showed up to show his/her ass and chide us for being critical of how Donk was dealing with grief. He/she then expressed deep regret for commenting here and ran away to go comment hatefully on other snark sites. All righty then.

      We heard from tipsters that those doing post-production on Miss Advised are reporting that Donkey comes off as exactly as she is — a fake, hammy asshole.

      Anything else, lover?

      • RRR says:

        I didn’t chide anybody, Jacy.

        Or express “deep regret.”

        I did, it would seem, drill straight into a nerve using the spire of the Empire State Building as the drill.

        For which I apologize.

        /slow fade

        /roll credits

      • juliaspublicist cried his rhinestone off juliaspublicist says:

        Nope. She’s still an asshole.

      • CurlingIronsAtDawn says:

        Jacy, you are on fire. Fire. I laughed until no noise came out.

      • Ass Baughers Syndrome says:

        Don’t forget CDB’s awesome pussy licking GIF!

  38. Donkey of Perdition says:

    I love the juxtaposition of these tweets:
    Julia Allison ‏ @JuliaAllison
    I love online lectures (MIT/Stanford, etc), but am overwhelmed by the sheer number of them. Is there a site which ranks & reviews them?

    Julia Allison ‏ @JuliaAllison
    My brother spent the last hour explaining his MIT phd dissertation, “Graphene Nano Electro Mechanical Resonators.” I feel stupid.

    Transbaraytion: Dadser I’m tots smart too, I’m taking online lectures at MIT, it’s like a 4 hour P.hd .
    [img]http://www.google.com/url?source=imglanding&ct=img&q=http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2128/2841349967_e2d0e35761.jpg&sa=X&ei=O49gT42jBKPr0gHnudizBw&ved=0CAsQ8wc&usg=AFQjCNEszWtrqsBllMh75ODP0Sc9WA5DvQ[/img]

  39. ShesJustStupid says:

    She tweeted Toilet Julia that she wishes she could be in Austin to see her perform. I think she’s PISSED she has to be home.

    • Albie Quirky says:

      Because she’s finding out that the actual process of being with someone in their last days is hard work, not all glamorous like a soap opera. She is so, so horrible. She wishes her whole life were a series of photo shoots.

      • Handbag Cohen Stuffed With Hair says:

        It’s so grim. Ten years ago my brother-in-law went to the doctor with a stomachache, and that evening my mom called to say I needed to come home — he was in the hospital and would not be leaving. All I remember of the next five or six days (which is how long it took him to die) is driving the 700 miles in a massive spring storm, then sleeping folded up like a cat on a waiting room couch, getting up for a steady stream of hysterically sad visitors, and making many many trips out for coffee and food for my sister, who was in such shock she had to be medicated. It was by far one of the worst experiences I’ve ever seen a family go through, and not a ball of laughs for me, either. But it’s life — that’s how it goes.

        • Sgatniks Neerg says:

          That happened to one of my best friends, We were on a camping trip together with our daughters. ( Indian princesses or whatever they call it now ) and he was complaining about his stomach. I told him it was probably bad food. He went to Dr, and had tests and had pancreatic cancer and was gone in a month. I hated God for a long time

        • Dyspeptic says:

          me, too. doubling down to both of you.

  40. JuliaCleaver says:

    Wait she traded Oprah even handed editing for Bravo asshole editing…

    If that is not Karma I do not know what is..

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