Vote In Our Exciting Poll: What Was Donkey’s Worst-Ever Fashion Week Outfit?

We all know unfashionable chicks. The ones named Roxy with mullets and camel toes who go to bars and dirty-dance to bad ’70s arena rock and go home with the alcoholic a few seats over at the end of the night. But I have never known  anyone who actually fancies herself fashionable, never mind covers fucking Fashion Week, who dresses more horribly than our donkey. Feast your eyes, bitches, then vote in our poll!

 

Floral Garden Party Atrocity

Tweed Calf-Flaunting

Blue-Black Dumb Tween Aqua Dress

Purple Stupid Jewellery Monstrosity

Fake Celebrity Giant Pants Weirdness

Not Again With The Calf-Flaunting Lame-O Pink Dress

Gigantic Douche Valentine’s Day Horror Show

Another Stupid Bad Day Dress With Inappropriate Jewellery Dress

Star Trek/Bad Boots Shitshow

Another Cheap Crap Tween Aqua Dress, Same Style, Different Colors

“You Didn’t Actually Wear That To Fashion Week” Tennis Skirt and Hooker Boots

Black Witch Sparkly Halloween Dress — No

Sad Old Hooker Red Satin Slutbag Dress

Mom Jeans

Pretty Pink Pianist With Visible Mental Problem

Navy Polyester Stupidity

Single White Female Braid Bootie Combo

Turquoise Terror

Petrifying Pink Hooves

Gucci Briefcase Hotness

Frilly Shiny Flammable Blue Nastiness

Original Fashion Disaster Shot From The Wrong Side

Barbie Valentine’s Fright Party

Braying In The Rain

Lacy Grey Sausages

What Is The Worst Fashion Week Outfit?

  • Barbie Valentine’s Fright Party (15%, 108 Votes)
  • Gigantic Douche Valentine's Day Horror Show (15%, 105 Votes)
  • "You Didn't Actually Wear That To Fashion Week" Tennis Skirt and Hooker Boots (12%, 84 Votes)
  • Star Trek/Bad Boots Shitshow (8%, 54 Votes)
  • Petrifying Pink Hooves (6%, 42 Votes)
  • Gucci Briefcase Hotness (5%, 39 Votes)
  • Original Fashion Disaster Shot From The Wrong Side (5%, 35 Votes)
  • Braying In The Rain (5%, 33 Votes)
  • Sad Old Hooker Red Satin Slutbag Dress (4%, 31 Votes)
  • Single White Female Braid Bootie Combo (4%, 27 Votes)
  • Fake Celebrity Giant Pants Weirdness (4%, 26 Votes)
  • Black Witch Sparkly Halloween Dress -- No (3%, 23 Votes)
  • Floral Garden Party Atrocity (3%, 22 Votes)
  • Lacy Grey Sausages (3%, 18 Votes)
  • Frilly Shiny Flammable Blue Nastiness (3%, 18 Votes)
  • Blue-Black Dumb Tween Aqua Dress (2%, 17 Votes)
  • Mom Jeans (1%, 6 Votes)
  • Another Stupid Bad Day Dress With Inappropriate Jewellery Dress (1%, 6 Votes)
  • Tweed Calf-Flaunting (1%, 5 Votes)
  • Purple Stupid Jewellery Monstrosity (1%, 4 Votes)
  • Turquoise Terror (0%, 3 Votes)
  • Pretty Pink Pianist With Visible Mental Problem (0%, 3 Votes)
  • Another Cheap Crap Tween Aqua Dress, Same Style, Different Colors (0%, 2 Votes)
  • Navy Polyester Stupidity (0%, 2 Votes)
  • Not Again With The Calf-Flaunting Lame-O Pink Dress (0%, 2 Votes)

Total Voters: 715

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337 Responses to Vote In Our Exciting Poll: What Was Donkey’s Worst-Ever Fashion Week Outfit?

  1. Albie Quirky says:

    I think the denim “original fashion disaster” romper is the worst. It’s just so horrible, and like she’s not even trying. At least she’s trying with the other shitshows.

    “Sexy secretary with magenta Jem-doll wedgies” may be my second choice. For some reason, that frosts my cupcake worse than the many polyester prom dress/black tights combos.

    • Get a Stylist says:

      Pink Jem outfit is atrocious. That and the horrible, tacky, cheap, ill fitting hooker boots, heart shirt and tennis skirt.

    • Norse Horse, Task Ass says:

      “Original fashion disaster” was my first choice as well. There’s a pic of it in the previous post that does better justice to the full hillbilly horror of it.

    • maid of dishonor says:

      [img]http://i39.tinypic.com/15fg386.png[/img]

      • maid of dishonor says:

        🙁 how do I make it tiny and cute?

      • maid of dishonor says:

        lemme try that again…

        [img]http://i42.tinypic.com/2j2x8hg.png[/img]

      • dd says:

        This got my vote. As I was looking through the pictures I was thinking that they were all equally horrific and there was no way to choose just one awful look. Until I saw this.

      • JFA says:

        Those shoes were never to be seen again. How much does this bitch buy that she never wears?

        • Extremely Large Size Medium says:

          I really wonder about the thought process that went into buying those shoes in the first place. Or… were they a gift? From someone who thought her BJ was second rate at best?

    • Skirt Pull says:

      I think she could actually look quite lovely if she took some advice from Stacy and Clinton. Dresses/tops/jackets fitted with darts to draw attention to her waist, skirts of an appropriate length rather than cut mid-thigh, slight A-line cuts as opposed to ballooning prom dresses with netting. No black tights with summer dresses (this COULD work with a large Anthropologie-esque chunky sweater but overall, no). She has a nice figure, but she needs to learn how to dress it and not arrest stylistically at 14 years old. Also, buy quality and a few beautifully tailored pieces rather than a million juniors dresses. I feel like I should be a fashion coach.

      • basementdoor says:

        So much agree. Honestly I think she has a nice body (ain’t nothin wrong with a pear bottom) – she’s no playboy pinup or skinny model but I think her figure is one of her better features. But then she wraps herself in cheap flouncey satin and enormous rhinestone necklaces and sausage curls and makes herself look ridiculous.

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          Co-sign 100 per cent. She really needs to embrace “under-stated” and/or “elegant.” She always chooses the cheapest, tackiest option in clothes, shoes, hair and makeup.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Here’s another rare donkey sighting of pretty, understated & elegant …
            [img]http://blog.juliaallison.com/Images/Julia%20Allison%20and%20Dad%20Georgetown%20Senior%20Ball.JPG[/img]
            (if you can overlook the weird tit-drifting underarm thing she has going on, which is where a nice wrap would serve her well.)

      • Albie Quirky says:

        Yes, absolutely.

        But she will never dress for the figure she has instead of the figure she imagines.

  2. Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

    I am just having a leeeettttlee bit of trouble actually publishing the actual poll. I am very sorry. Give me a second to figure it out. I have created it but can’t figure out how to make it appear.

    MATH IS HARD!

  3. Frequent Liar Miles says:

    Too hard. My mind is baughled. I give up.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Wait, I take it back. I voted for Tweed Calf-Flaunting, won over by the combination of hideous matronly bun and kick pleat on dress still tacked closed with basting stitch.

      • Freeloading Musketeers says:

        Ha! I hadn’t noticed that, but you are right. The skirt is still sewn closed. Classy.

      • Dyspeptic says:

        So cruel to describe Donks’ homage to Audrey Hepburn as matronly, and to notice the basting stitches.

  4. CDB says:

    Black wicked witch of the west dress.

  5. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    So many of these astound me. The first one looks like Laura Ashley vomited on her. But the Black and White one, where she looks like she is wearing a nurse’s volunteer uniform on backwards is just SO. NOT. FASHUN!

    It is a testament to her gigantic ego that she thinks she looks AMAZE-BALLS in each and every one of these.

    Tough to decide here.

  6. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    Whoa, Valentine’s dress, kinder whore with black tights pulled up her dress for all to see… dear God, she is a mental case.

    • Kissy Face to a Crowd of Crickets says:

      that’s how I voted. fucking black tights and magenta cheap hooker hooves.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      That got my vote too. It’s appalling on every front. Way too small. Tits popping out grossly and inappropriately. Mismatched reds. Bad, bad middle-part ‘do and sausage curls. Smug, self-obsessed look on her face.

      And she thinks it’s SO hot. She posted about 25 photos of herself on FB in that outfit. Oh honey.

  7. Princess WideStance says:

    Tennis skirt, hands down. Just so unfathomable that anyone would wear this ensemble anywhere. It’s *literally* insane.

    • Oh god says:

      Actually, I had a similar outfit. The skirt was not quite as polyester. I wore it my freshman year of high school. I think I made zero friends that entire year. I was 14.

  8. She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

    How to choose?!?
    Actually, it’s interesting how some of her early disasters (the black and blue and the two purple dresses) almost (ALMOST) look fashionable compared to her recent debacles.

    • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

      I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think I actually like the frilly blue thing. Not for Fashion Week, regardless of how much Donkey wants to straddle the line between celebrity and journalist she’s neither and therefore should stop trying to pull focus at FW and go as low-key as possible, but for a fancy event? With some tailoring so the top isn’t sliding down? I could stand by it.

      Also, I kind of like the jeans. For fashion week. She could have done better with the top, but high-waisted Mom jeans were a thing for a while. I think that’s something that someone like her, who’s basically just there to say she went, should wear.

      Terribly, I know. I’ll show myself out.

      • crazytrain says:

        I completely agree about the mom jeans – not perfect execution but way, way better than any of her other atrocities. I attended a fashion week event once when I lived in NY, and everyone there who wasn’t “someone” was just wearing jeans and a nice jacket or blouse. You could identify the celebrities or socialites because their outfits stood out among the sea of understated normal people. Julia dresses like this because in her own mind she’s an it-girl.

      • BJ KELLEY'S FISTED ASSHOLE says:

        I agree completely with the “almost” part. Even still, she is always ALMOST there fashion-wise, but there’s always one or two things that are so wrong they makes everything else look like a disaster.

        Normally it’s the fit and the material.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          She’s not always “almost there”, though. Sometimes she’s just heading in the opposite direction entirely from “there”. Original Fashion Disaster Denim Romper Plus Orthopedic Wedges, for instance.

          “Almost there” is her best effort.

    • Extremely Large Size Medium says:

      I really think someone needs to take away her black tights, for her own good. They have a place (IMO) but one needs to not be a donkey in order to know what to wear black tights with.

  9. idiotbox says:

    This is impossible. Also, you MUST include the gray blazer/hideous tights outfit that made Mary want to vomit!

    • idiotbox says:

      ARRRGH WHY DON’T YOU LET ME POST IT, WORDPRESS?! [img]http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kptxpmTDA11qz6dlko1_400.jpg[/img]

      • Prof. F Camping says:

        aww Jacy you left out tapdancing Donkey!

        [img]http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kpw8okCP5q1qz6dlko1_400.jpg[/img]

        • Kissy Face to a Crowd of Crickets says:

          OMG. this might be the worst. juniors spring dress with a black belt and platform booties. i just kant.

        • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

          There it is!! That’s the worst FW outfit. It might be her worst outfit ever.

          Actually, no. Her Burning Man stuff was her worst ever, but that’s a close second.

        • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

          Fuck, both of those are supposed to be in there. I even have the photos in the queue! Must have skipped over them somehow.

          STAND BY. STOP VOTING. POLL IS BEING REVISED!!!!!

        • Frequent Liar Miles says:

          This was one of my favorite-worsts, too. I seem to remember that she proudly noted that she added the black belt from another outfit to make it edgier. Well, Donk should know from edgy since she went over the edge (of sanity) long ago.

      • Skirt Pull says:

        Those tights look like massive spider veins.

    • darling dearest says:

      I was coming to comment that this outfit was missing. It was during her jordan phase, right?

  10. Powerful Moms with Fantastic Sons says:

    I CAN’T CHOOSE! They are all so so very bad. The Valentine’s shit show with the Moon Boots triggers my gag reflex because I hate those boots with such passion. And obviously the outfit. And red tights. But the Moon Boots push me over the edge.

    The there’s the hooker boots with the ridiculous pink heart shirt. And the “Original Fashion Disaster,” which looks like something one of the Duggar daughter would put long-sleeved shirt under and wear. I can’t even get into those pink hooves. And it goes without saying that the tacky too-tight prom dresses are ridiculous.

    But I think I’m leaning toward the “Giant Douche Valentine’s Day Horror Show” as her worst look. It’s just so tragic! The black tights with the red shoes and the tight dress and the boobs. But it’s also the look on her face. It’s just so. fucking. SMUG. SHe is so delusional and I can just imagine her thinking, “drink it all in, bitches. DRINK. IT. ALL. IN.”

  11. Dr. Gary says:

    Wow. They are all SO BAD. Hard to decide. Maybe ‘Original Fashion Disaster Shot From The Wrong Side’, because it looks like something a 14 year-old girl would wear at summer camp.

    Each photo has a title, which LOL. But the jpg names are super LOL.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      Ugh. So HARD. Now I’m looking at ‘Barbie Valentine’s Fright Party’ and I JUST KANT with the red tutu, red tights and moon boots.

      But then you just posted ‘Braying In The Rain’ and it brought back memories of her Single White Female-ing Jordan.

  12. Prof. F Camping says:

    tough call… i might vote for the frilly blue monstrosity, but then i’m not 100% sure she wore it to FW (i think it was to nick bilton’s book launch party thing).
    after that, i’m torn between floral tablecloth and tennis skirt with hooker boots.

    • Prof. F Camping says:

      (i take it back, she did wear that frilly blue thing to FW)
      but HOLD UP, i found some more contenders!

      (so grande so gordo!)
      http://quentinfears.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/img_8798.jpg

      [img]http://cache2.asset-cache.net/xc/109139554.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=77BFBA49EF87892102A727B1636DE2E63315AE26B1CB04BC7BE6665AD6AE227EBAF56562134845F0[/img]

      and here’s one i almost kind of like, sans the jewelry

      [img]http://cache2.asset-cache.net/xc/104085483.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=77BFBA49EF87892102A727B1636DE2E6C1BEACB009C386725BC64ABBB8F541717B840BF096012581[/img]

      • JFA - Still no one cares jackasshole says:

        AHAHAH! That white dress photo. LOOK AT HER POSE.

        I stand by what I said below. I am starting to think she was dropped on her head as a baby/has brain damage. She SAT THERE with that pretend-I’m-laughing-and-care-free face on probably for a good 2 minutes while Lasagna her dog handler took that picture.

      • zandra says:

        That photo of her in the blue dress really accentuates her bow leggedness. No wonder she always does that ‘criss cross’ leg contortion when posing.

      • Whitleymariongilbertwaynemeetsscarysadshaw says:

        I miss that face.

      • TheSpanishInterrogation says:

        white dress pose is very Victoria Grayson #revenge the #fail is Donkey is 30 and the actress who plays Victoria is (Madeleine Stowe) 53. Good for Madeleine, Bad for a Donkey.

      • Donkeycam now! says:

        OMG!!!

        Look at the size of that canklehausen!!!

        It’s gi-fuck-ng-normous!

  13. awkwardposer says:

    I just kept scrolling and every time I’d say, “Oh, that’s definitely the one” it would be ousted by the following photo. I can barely dress myself and I still would never have showed up to… well… anything dressed in this garbage. Hooooooooly cats.

  14. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

    Ima go against the grain here & say what is, IMHO, remotely likable about any of Donkey’s dragstumes above.

    :: crickets ::

    Kidding! This will be short & sweet, I promise.

    Tweed Calf-Flaunting
    Not her worst hoof forward … the hair is better, & the bare arms matching the bare legs is more like it. I’m not crazy about those black shoes, but she’s sort of on the right track.

    Not Again With The Calf-Flaunting Lame-O Pink Dress
    Again, bare arms matching bare legs, yes. Those particular nude hooker heels are heinous, but the color & height seems the way to go to elongate her back legs. Pelts in any style not a sausage curl beats the hell out of her usual M.O., & form fitting dresses make the most of her curves, if she’d just keep her tits out of the public eye.

    Star Trek/Bad Boots Shitshow
    I think she could have gotten away w/ the boots, were it not for the black tights contrasting w/ the bare arms, but then she went & topped it off w/ the bobby-pin mullet & fucked up an otherwise (somewhat) cute dress.

    Mom Jeans
    I have a different impression of what qualifies as Mom Jeans — these would be okay, had she not paired ’em w/ the ridiculous jewelry, ugly-ass shirt & brown hooflets.

    Pretty Pink Pianist With Visible Mental Problem
    For me, the hair, the dress, the shoes & even the ring are okay … IF that was the only time the ring made an appearance & IF Donkey wasn’t posing w/ a smirk, pretending to do something she never, ever does.

    Turquoise Terror
    Eh. I don’t hate it like I hate her usual poofy skirts, but if it were longer & paired w/ some strappy silver or taupe sandals, it might be really cute.

    Petrifying Pink Hooves
    I thought this was really cute for her figure, until the Pepto Dismal Hooves, that is.

    SEVEN. Out of all these atrocities, only seven don’t make me shower vom.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      With the utmost respect, I counter:

      1. It’s a cheap looking, formless sack, and she looks 55 with the hair. Just didn’t work.
      2. It’s actually not SO bad but the calf-flaunt made me put it in there.
      3. Another epic fail in combining two styles that absolutely cannot and should not be paired.
      4. Again, she failed to pull it together. One item that isn’t so bad doesn’t matter if she fucks everything else up.
      5. The shoes are an outrage.
      6. I hated that dress but I know some of you haters liked it. I just thought it looked cheap, itchy and flammable.
      7. The outfit was way too small and again, no points if you pair it with something completely ridiculous.

      She has had one FW outfit in the past few seasons that I liked. It was sort of a form-fitting ’40s style black dress, or possibly a two-piece suit, definitely a pencil skirt, with her hair in a low bun and a big necklace that actually worked with the neckline. It was a perfect style for her figure and the hideous pelts weren’t visible. Also didn’t hate that red polka-dot dress.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        You’re right on all counts, natch.

        I think I went astray by forgetting that Donkey is only 31 … here I was trying to be charitable to a seemingly 45-year-old divorcée ~slash~ secretaries-on-ice ~slash~ pathetisad mid-west hick …

        Donkey at FW is as out of place as Donkey on a gay singles cruise.

      • Mini Driver says:

        This one. I liked it too.

        http://julia.nonsociety.com/post/1106773734

        [img]http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l8m7iqEhzH1qz6dlko1_400.jpg[/img]

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          Yeah, she had a bit of glam going on there.

          Right above or just below the knee works.
          (preferably below)

        • BJ KELLEY'S FISTED ASSHOLE says:

          This is perfect for her figure. I don’t get why she can’t see that.

          Oh right she’s crazy.

        • Skirt Pull says:

          YES! This is gorgeous on her. Appropriate length. Accentuates the waist. Not ridiculous jewelry and shoes of an appropriate color. But also much more demure and not “look at me! look at me” which is why I think this style doesn’t get worn more often.

          If she just dressed this way more often, she’d look amazing.
          There was another outfit I liked, I remember she and someone else wore it the same day at one FW several years ago. Maybe interviewing DVF in? Like a plaid jacket and a knee-length (not thigh-length) skirt.

        • Albie Quirky says:

          I don’t love the collar or the cap sleeves, but the general line of the dress is fabulous for her.

          She must have gone in in person to get a c/o and the staff refused to listen to her delusions about what size she wore or what looked good on her.

      • Mini Driver says:

        Also, although everything you say about the B&W sleeveless tweed with the slingbacks is true, I remember being impressed with it at first blush. I think it’s that this is one of the few outfits where she has at least attempted to adopt the costume of a reporter, instead of gussying up as if she were hoping to be mistaken for a celebrity.

  15. Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

    I want to say two things:

    1. It was HARD doing that poll. Technically and just going through the SEA of really horrific outfits.

    2. Look at her mean, nasty, smug face in Turquoise Terror. That’s the look I imagine she has on her face when she does her nastiest shit. Outing JL’s issues, dreaming up “Jack McCain’s Lawyer,” breaking into Pancakes’ phone and email, sending the threatening emails from “Morning Muffin,” sending the cunty email to the fiancee. AM I RIGHT?? The true JA, right there.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      Yeah, but I almost think she looks a little more evil in ‘Fake Celebrity Giant Pants Weirdness’. That one, to me, looks like her true evil self slipped out for just a moment.

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      Black Witch Sparkly Halloween Dress and Pretty Pink Pianist With Mental Problems, to me is where she looks her most evil. So smug and evil.

      • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

        I vote for Pretty Pink Pianist for most smug. You can tell she’s imagining all her haters seeing the picture and being sooooo jelly! We’re not, Donkey. We’re not jelly at all.

        • Kitchen Tampon says:

          Just voted for Pretty Pink Pianist With Visible Mental Problem too! I realize now I might have been voting for “Funniest Outfit Title” instead of “Worst Outfit.” Didn’t mean to skew the results. They’re all so bad.

  16. Emma Bourricot says:

    These are all so hideous, but I’m feeling obliged to choose one with black hoisery. And thank you for reminding me of so many of these FW atrocities, particularly her Aqua phase. Those dresses looked like something from the clearance rack at Gabriel Brothers.

  17. Albie Quirky says:

    That cross-legged splay stance drives me up the fucking wall. Where did she learn that horrorshow? That shit wouldn’t have flown in a local department store catalogue shoot ca. 1975.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      Didn’t one of Julia Allison’s illegal interns recommend that she position her hind legs that way in fauxtos?

    • zandra says:

      At least in the photo with the green top and jeans she’s standing like a normal person.

  18. Albie Quirky says:

    In “Gucci Briefcase”, she and MMBH look like spunky 50-something realtors from Tulsa on their way to see CATS on Broadway.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      Only thing missing?
      They should have poodles tucked under their arms.
      (it’s a ‘realator’ thang ’round these parts)

  19. braying at the criscotheque says:

    BEST POST IN A LONG TIME. this collection of atrocious photographs just brightened my day.

  20. Cowboys & Brayliens says:

    Jesus fuck.

    Here’s my brain, reading this post:

    “Hmm. Okay. Okay. Alright, that’s the… fuck, no, that’s the one… what the fuck? Okay that’s definitely WHAT THAT’S EVEN WORSE I DON’T EVEN okay okay, nothing could be worse than OH FUCK THIS ONE’S THE WORST, NO THIS ONE, NO THIS ONE, HOW, HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?!?!?!!?” *head desk*

    I can’t decide whether to keel over laughing, or empty the contents of my stomach into the nearest shower. I vote “all of the above”.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      LOL!

    • Cowboys & Brayliens says:

      Holy FUCK I just noticed the contortions she does with her legs. There isn’t one picture that looks natural, not one. Can you imagine how she must tense up her leg and hip muscles to try to get — in her mind — just the right pose?

      So I am forced to decide between “Widestance” and “Crossover-Hipcheck”. Argh, fuck, I just can’t.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        I hear ya — that’s why my brain revolted & tried to do the opposite — so much less to consider if you decide which dragstume you hate the least.

      • Princess WideStance says:

        I’m being rung a lot.

  21. Fake Kidney Infucktion says:

    I think it’d be easier to ask which one is the best. No, that would be really hard too. I really can’t understand why she either dresses like a 16 year old or a 60 year old.
    Also? She ruined platform heels. I was never a big fan, but now I find myself wincing and thinking “donkey hooves” when I see them.
    “No…don’t get the platforms…maybe go with a shorter heel…it will look more…elegant” is what I say when I really want to say “NEVER THE DONKEY”.

    • Cowboys & Brayliens says:

      The best one is easiest– giant pants wierdness. At least she looks like a reasonable person in that one. The bag is idiotic, and the pants could be lifted by an inch, but it isn’t completely obnoxious.

      • Fake Kidney Infucktion says:

        I think you’re absolutely right. The pants don’t fit, but at least they’re not too tight. If you cover her head, it looks like something a sane person (with 0 fashion sense) might wear.
        Now if she wore some cute jeans and flats with the blazer (though I’m not 100% sold on the blazer) and ditched the bag/necklace and wore her hair in a ponytail? Well then that might be something decent looking. Boring, but decent.

    • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

      I feel you. I love ankle boots and every time I’m about to buy a pair I think, “Are these like the Stinky Booties? Is it ok as long as I don’t wear them every damned day until they disintegrate from foot odor? DAMN DONKEY!!!”

  22. skye504 says:

    The hardest part for me to deal with was that I could see the potential in some of the outfits (SOME, not all) and where they could actually look nice. So for me to sit there and actually pick one was hard because I had to let go of the part of me that wanted to jump through the computer screen and go “If we just grab a tissue and blot 60% of the makeup off, take off 3 out of the 6 pieces of statement jewelry you’re wearing and unpinned your hair and messed with it a bit you’d look good.” But I’ve got to go with the moon boots one. Who in God’s name pairs a red, frilly, cheap-looking skirt with MOON BOOTS?! Who?! You’ve got to be seriously detached from reality to think that that works. I say this as someone who loves an edgy look and owns way too many pairs of studs, grommets, harness boots and leather things–along with a ton of blazers, plaid skirts and button downs. Somehow I never end up looking like a crazy fetish photo op unlike this chick who’s all bows and ribbons and looks like a dirty old man’s bizzaro dream.

    • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

      I did the same thing. I thought about doing a huge long comment running down how most of the outfits had some potential, if they fit or were styled differently or were wore by a different person, but I decided that you all probably weren’t interested in my armchair stylist-ing.

  23. Get a Stylist says:

    OMG. What a great idea (suggested by yours truly). I am having a shit work week (month). Waiting to collect on a bonus (fingers crossed) and resigning immediately thereafter. This horrid fashion retrospective almost got me to smile.

  24. Handbag Stuffed With Hair says:

    Big cat love to the five peeps who voted with me on the Gucci briefcase.

  25. skye504 says:

    Oh yeah, a little OT, but for people saying she an eyelid lift in the other threads, hadn’t she ever heard of 2 miracle potions otherwise known as glycolic acid and Retin-A? That, along with sunscreen works wonders for maintaining your skin and will keep things where they belong for much, much longer. I say this as a 20 something who was beginning to notice small things starting to creep in on my face, even though I always apply sunscreen year round rain or shine. They make the biggest difference, especially in the eye area since both accelerate cell turnover and keep skin nice and cushioned with extra collagen. Just 2 daily things! They help SO much and cost way less than surgery!

    • notes from the academe says:

      Hmm. Can you expand on this/give a product rec? For the acid, not the Retin-A.

      • skye504 says:

        I’m a fan of it in a face wash by Peter Thomas Roth, which you can buy at Sephora. It’s 3% glycolic acid. It works beautifully. Now that it’s winter I don’t use it every day, more like every other day, but it really helps clarify my skin and fade any remaining acne scars and any teeny tiny lines I saw forming are now gone. I only use it in the morning because it weakens the effectiveness of the Retin-A which should ONLY be applied at night. In the summer I use it every day because it is so hot and humid where I live and it really helps cut back on residue on my face. It’s great with the Clarisonic cleansing brush. That thing works like a charm too! Best investment I ever made. It really cleans out all the gunk. haha I sound like a commercial for all this stuff! But I promise, it really WORKS.

        • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

          Retina A recs? Spill it!

        • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

          Meaning OTC./

          • skye504 says:

            I have only had any real luck with Retin-A Micro 0.5% which is only available thru a doctor and works best for my very sensitive, oily skin. Sorry! I hear that ROC’s retin-A serum is supposed to be really good, but I’ve tried ’em all before I got the real deal. They don’t call it that for no reason! It works very well.

        • notes from the academe says:

          Thank you! I’ll keep my eyes open for it, but probably won’t be near a Sephora any time soon.

    • Mini Driver says:

      I was going to say something sarcastic about people in their twenties not being qualified to give advice on anti-aging treatments, but then I was overwhelmed by feminist sadness that someone so young would be concerned about her aging face to begin with. 🙁

  26. Psycho Shiller Qu'est-ce Que Bray says:

    Oh my jesus. This was a GFY scrolldown fug, and I am actually speechless. She used to be kind of cute. I know everyone likes to scoff, like, SHE WAS A PLAIN GIRL OLD NOSE ET CETERA, but she used to dress in cute-ish outfits and she was pretty. I’m literally sad now. She doesn’t even look older as in aged. She looks hard. Couldn’t have happened to a nicer person.
    Wait.

    • a JA moment says:

      the hair decisions she’s made have been awful, awful, awful! when i first became aware of her (january 2008), she WAS kind of cute! she had the dark hair and pre-injections, and had some good things going for her.

      it was very hard to pick a worst. i went with the tween dresses – so unflattering.

      • AFGHANI FACEBOOK FRIEND (the real one) says:

        In 07 and 08 she still had brown hair and she’d only had one nosejob, the veneers, and maybe the chin thing. That was the best she looked because they addressed the Dadster nose, rat teeth, and lack of a chin. She couldn’t stop there, of course, she followed MMBH off the deep end of botox, restylane, and so forth. She looks horrible with red hair and all that refuse Dr Booby has injected into her ghoul like vissage.

  27. Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

    Can someone tell me what’s going on with the shoes in Purple Stupid Jewellery Monstrosity? Are those gladiator sandals with tights??? What?? Also, iron much? Did she take that thing up six inches and then fail to iron it? What is going on?

    That just earned a vote from me. We all get three, by the way. So vote on your worst three, and then I’ll do a post at some point with the Top Three Worst Fashion Week Outfits.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      THAT outfit MAY be THE one …

      The black ring that matches her nail polish that matches her sausage casings?

      The gold-themed shoes that most certainly do NOT match the silver-themed paste-rhinestone jewelry that does NOT go w/ the ring?

      The too-tight sleeves on the hemmed-by-a-one-hoofed-legally-blind-donkey?

      The 40 lbs of pelted sausage curls that draw down on her horsey face?

      :: shudder ::

  28. Delurked says:

    THIS IS AN IMPOSSIBLE QUESTION AND I CANNOT ANSWER

    or, in the words of my spirit animal, “i don’t understand the question, and i refuse to respond to it.”

  29. crazytrain says:

    OT, but Christine Kelly totally called her out on facebook for posting horrible pictures of her. (I’d screenshot but I don’t know how on my work computer.)

    Christine Kelly I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU.
    13 hours ago · Like

    Christine Kelly LITERALLY MURDER
    13 hours ago · Like

    Christine Kelly Also send me the cute photos of Adam and I please where I actually looked great (versus looking like Wednesday from the Adam’s family). thnx

    I love the part about how there were actually great photos of Christine but Donkey chose to post only the bad ones because she thought she herself looked good in it, never mind how anyone else looks or feels. I can’t understand how this cunt has friends.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      She doesn’t have them for long.

      • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

        Her friends from her NY webutard days seem to be very busy whenever she’s in town. Where are the Karps, RVVs, Sklars and Chazes of yesteryear?

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          Okay, just the mention of RVV has me chuckling, cuz he did Donkey-Bitch, Please fauxto’s like no other!

          While looking for those, I found some more fashun fauxpaws …

          Is Donkey wearing hot air balloon silks?
          [img]http://26.media.tumblr.com/NB8YioMLicrc2v4whcJWsBPC_400.jpg[/img]

          Donkey sports a MMBH Wristicle!
          [img]http://photos.juliaallison.com/Images/Julia%20Allison%20TIME%20100%20Gala%201.jpg[/img]

          Careful, your face will get stuck like that! Oh, wait …
          [img]http://28.media.tumblr.com/NB8YioMLii4p3wub7QRSBmNqo1_400.jpg[/img]

          And lastly … because I’m 12 …
          [img]http://www.gamesforgirls.us/pics/Donkey_dressUp.jpg[/img]

    • Not! Random! says:

      And she doesn’t even look good in that wonky picture of Christina — she’s got her head down so you can’t see her face.

      On second thought, I guess that was the best one of Donksers.

    • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

      I meant to mention this last night because a Donkey was posting those at 3:30am and I thought Christine Kelly is going to flip her fucking nut when she wakes up and sees herself tagged in these.

      Seriously, what a cunt. Like, don’t tag your friend in them, maybe run it past her first.

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      And hasn’t she done this to Christine before? I think Christine actually called her out then as well. I guess Ms. Kelly likes to learn things the hard way.

      • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

        This is definitely the second time that’s happened. Hopefully CK now understands that Donkey just doesn’t give a fuck.

    • Effervescent Suppositories says:

      [img]https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/430819_941469036355_1402715_40797699_2040482347_n.jpg[/img]

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        I actually don’t hate that dress, I just hate that she’s in it. I think it’s quite cute if you can blur out her head.

        • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

          But as usual she overdoes it with a gigantic overwhelming faux fur vest – yeah, I get it, it’s from Rachel Zoe but you just canceled out both pieces by wearing them together.

  30. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

    I think I’m going to have to go w/ “Gucci Briefcase Hotness” because WTF IS GOING ON THERE?

    Looks like a hooker dressed in lingerie robbed a used-car-salesman john of his beat-to-hell briefcase & polyester sports jacket & is hiding out at FW, trying to blend in.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      You can vote three times!

      • zandra says:

        I am going to sign in under multiple IDs so I can vote for all of them because they’re all FUCKING TERRIBLE.

    • Shamoo£ia says:

      That was the year she found a beat up old Gucci briefcase and a nasty old Chanel bag in granny’s attic and carried them around like she had some pristine vintage pieces. Oh honey no.

  31. Kissy Face to a Crowd of Crickets says:

    sorry to be OT, and i know i should probably be posting this in the forums, but i’m old and scared of new things. i am about to have a week off from work, and i need reading recommendations! you catladies have recommended some good shit over the last year (Freedom, Kevin, etc) so please, cough up some hairballs containing literary gold!! thanks, hugs, kisses, doritos, etc.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      Lonesome Dove.

    • Sausage Curls and Such says:

      three of my favorites from the last year-ish:

      1. blood, bones and butter: the inadvertent education of a reluctant chef. this isn’t a fancy book about fancy food, it’s about a relationship to food, and family, and other good things.

      2. in the woods (dublin murder squad #1). this is the first in a series of three so far. i liked this one, and the second one (the likeness) i liked even more. haven’t read the third one yet, but highly recommend these two.

      3. the night circus. it’s low on plot and long on imagery, but it’s a beautiful book if you’re into that kind of thing.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        I found the ending of In The Woods unsatisfying, however. Though loved the writing and the story and the characters.

        • Fashion Girl says:

          Co-sign on any book by Tania French. I loved “The Likeness” and enjoyed the other two. I can’t remember the name of the third one, but it centers around Frank, Cassie’s boss in “The Likeness”.

        • Hell Hath No Fury Like a Woman Expired says:

          Anything Tana French is a good read. “The Likeness” was by far my favorite in the series. #4 in the series, from Scorcher’s POV, is coming out sometime this year.

    • 11th Wang says:

      Anything Amy Hempel

    • supermassive black holes fka mule on rouge says:

      A Geography of Secrets, Frederick Reuss
      (all his stuff is pretty great, actually, esp. Horace Afoot and Henry of Atlantic City)

    • supermassive black holes fka mule on rouge says:

      Also Foresthills by David Brooks (might be Kindle only right now), it’s the
      author’s collection of stories from his job as public defender in a quirky little town (think David Lynch version of Lake Woebegon)

    • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

      I really liked Swaplandia! and Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children. Both are kind of mystical realist so if you’re down for that those are good choices.

    • BunnyBingo says:

      Some oldies but goodies:

      The Best of Everything by Rona Jaffe
      The Group by Mary McCarthy
      Peyton Place by Grace Metalious

    • Jack the Bravo Bulldog says:

      Just finished Alan Hollinghurst’s The Stranger’s Child, a sprawling comedy of manners with an opening section that reminded me somewhat of Waugh’s Brideshead Revisited–Highly Recommended!

    • Fashion Girl says:

      I’m going to go to bat again for “Game of Thrones”. If you need a palate cleanser, it is good stuff. I’ve finally reached the point where I’ve stopped hiding it in my bag out of shame while I’m reading it on the East River Ferry or subway. (Although I still look around to make sure no one is reading over my shoulder when it gets to the parts that are all, “He mounted her from behind like a stallion, his heaving member growing larger with each gasp escaping her lips.”)

      • Delurked says:

        YES!! So fucking good.

      • so sorry, so fat says:

        yessity yes. i’m a huge sci-fi fantasy nerd, and have read them all (shameface: read them all twice). george rr martin has super misogynist/bizarrely romance novel tendencies, but he does tell a damn good story, and i’m sufficiently sucked in that i’ll be along for the whole ride.

    • MY Place says:

      Net of Jewels and Light Can Be Both Wave and Particle by Ellen Gilchrist. Actually anything by her, she is ineffable.

  32. Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

    Holy shit bitches I just watched last night’s Spreecast, apparently broadcast from rural Turkey, and I just saw that سامو الروح showed up. Killing myself. So fucking funny.

  33. helobabe says:

    I know this should be in the forum but I’m not sure how many people use it yet… Going to Paso Robles for a weekend trip. Any recos?

    • crazytrain says:

      Oooh I love Paso! Two of the best:

      – Venteux Vineyards. It’s run by a lovely woman named Bobbi who knows everything about everything and is just about the most hospitable person you’ll ever meet. Not to mention, fantastic wine.

      – Turley Wine Cellar. Best pinot in california.

    • Frequent Liar Miles says:

      Don’t know if you are into historical sightseeing, but Mission San Miguel is nearby, and it is so beautiful. The painted wall decorations are mostly all original, the gardens are simple and lovely, and there is such a peaceful vibe throughout.

      http://www.missionsanmiguel.org/

  34. JFA - Still no one cares jackasshole says:

    I CANNOT CHOOSE. I’ve never had such a hard decision in my life. These are all so, so bad. And I cannot describe the level of loathing I have for both pairs of YSL’s. Hate them so much.

    The titles alone are killing me. Jacy has been on fire. I am in hating life mode so I wanna thank you all for the laughs all the time.

    • helobabe says:

      *hugs*

      You’re always welcome in chat 😉

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      The beige ones are seriously horrific. And they’re kind of dirty; you can tell in photos that they’re all scuffed up and semi-stained. JESUS.

      • JFA - Still no one cares jackasshole says:

        EVEN THE BLACK ONES. First of all there is no way in hell anyone can walk in slingbacks that high. If it’s true they are real and were purchased by a creepy male fan, how do you pick a style that is just so bad? How do you fuck up a chance at $700 shoes? I so, so, so wanna see her in person wearing those one day, trying to walk.

        But the all time worst shoe-trocity is the white hooves. Even she seems smart never never to have trotted those fucking things out ever again. Why.

        I refuse to believe that she wore the flammable blue nastiness dress during FW. I mean they are all just…so inappropriate but that one takes the cake for “This is not the fucking junior prom you lunatic what are you doing?”

        • JFA - Still no one cares jackasshole says:

          That dress alone just really makes me believe her problems go beyond something like BPD, NPD, or sociopathy (Which I’m sure she suffers from). It makes me not doubt that she has brain damage. How can you be so out of touch with everything around you that you think that dress is appropriate for that forum. Someone get her help already. I am going to die from the tacky.

      • Shamoo£ia says:

        Here’s how nasty and filthy the beige fake YSLs are. I can’t find it right now, but there’s another similar picture taken on a plane and they look even worse. Like, you can literally see the sweaty foot marks on the insole.

        [img]http://i42.tinypic.com/4hwfir.jpg[/img]

        • Freeloading Musketeers says:

          Those socked feet are horrifying.

          • Diabetic Feet says:

            You raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            “Conference call for Diabetic Feet & Sequoia Tree Stumps, pink courtesy phone, line 4 please.”

          • pearipathetic donkey says:

            She goes through her photos for hours to decide what’s fit to publish, but then she puts photos like this up? How can she possibly think it looks good? These must be for her Middle Eastern chubby chaser foot fetish fans.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          I do remember that airplane pic of her pink & white striped hooves in socks & those fetid yellow shoes in the aisle but it seems to have been vanquished from the internet — good job, Donkutation Defender!

          Most likely that fauxto was a subtle bray-out to some sugar daddy that brayby needed new shoes.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      I cannot describe how hard I laughed thinking up the titles, and some of the photo names. I had a long stressful day running errands at my desk and then got home and laughed for an hour.

  35. du/coveted vag space says:

    this is on her fucking fecebook. high class call girl, much? for just one night?? girl. get some self respect, yo.

    Flying out at the crack of dawn from New York to SF to see a certain adorable, musically gifted someone … just for one night! Then finally HOME to LA on Saturday with Taylor Greason. Can’t wait to see my girls, Julia & Lillydog. What a February … LA, Chicago, New York, SF, LA. I’m going around in circles here.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      OH GROSS. But she’s been flaunting her dates with “The Brit.” Gross gross gross. Don’t tell me the strategy worked. HAVE SOME RESPECT, JELLY D.

      • mcakez: Taste the Passion! of Relationship Tofu! says:

        Considering her early departure from FW, more likely scenario: Her: “Hey, I’m passing through after FW. Let’s hang out!!”
        Him: “Sorry, I’m, uh, busy this weekend.”
        Her: “Well, I don’t REALLY have to do my Spreecast, or, you know, write those little blurbs, in fact, I just got a message saying they’ve moved to Guam. So, Thursday it is!”
        Him: “Uhhh, actually –”
        Her: “What? Can’t hear you over my new favorite song, “We Are Young” — you should check it out. See you then, honey bunny!!!”

        *click*

        • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

          Remember when she was planning to visit Tucker Max in Austin, then canceled, presumably because he showed zero interest in seeing her again under any circumstances?

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            What????!! No, I do not remember that at all.

          • AFGHANI FACEBOOK FRIEND (the real one) says:

            … and then Tucker Max got engaged soon afterwards… so ummm yeah, Donk never had a chance. How delusional she is/was.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Tucker Max is ENGAGED?
            I don’t believe it.

            Financial statement incoming?

          • Albie Quirky says:

            Tucker Max said he was engaged or close to it in his horrible sociopathic interview with greasy sex gargoyle Michael Ellsberg.

            Could be a lie, since it’s Tucker Max, but.

        • ShesJustStupid says:

          This is totally what happened. She invented a reason to be in SF. Because she’s a stalker.

      • mcakez: Taste the Passion! of Relationship Tofu! says:

        P.S. Mc Jelly D seems like the kind of guy who can use google. He also seems like the kind of guy who might have a lot of friends who would be interested in figuring out the crazy ‘famiss’ girl who is jocking him, and who also probably know how to google.

        How do we not have tipsters pouring in? *sob*

        • solidarity cat says:

          *Sob* indeed! Hopefully they’ll start coming out of the woodwork if this keeps up for much longer.

      • 11th Wang says:

        It was probably cheaper for her to fly into SF than into LA. She’s turning it into a date. She’s a fucking LOON.

        • supermassive black holes fka mule on rouge says:

          Probably asked if she could crash at his place between flights, all scheme-y like.

      • Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

        What is Andrew Bancroft going to hang with a Donkey after a Brit has been all up in her skin tags…

        I think he has a show and she is showing up whether he wants her there or not. She’ll pretend she’s picking up Greasy or is breezing through SF for some other reason.

        • solidarity cat says:

          Exactly this. Even if he’s blown her off I can see her pulling the friend card and saying she wants to support him anyway. Bunny!

      • SchadenfreudianSlip says:

        Come on Jacy. You know better than that. Rule 1, nothing, NOTHING, is as she says it is. We don’t know what is really happening, but what we do know for 100% certainty is that whatever she claims is happening, and however she views the situations, is not what Jelly D thinks is happening or how he views it. And we know hilarity/manic craziness will ensue.

        I don’t remember who said it (many times), but every single thing, every word that comes out of her mouth, is a lie, fabrication, incredible exaggeration. . ..

        She is truly a lunatic.

        The only thing this FB does is confirm once again that Greason is just as huge a tool as she is.

      • JFA says:

        I guarantee this dude loves that she goes out with other guys – it means he is off the hook in terms of commitment. My own negative experiences with players proves this to be true.

    • 11th Wang says:

      Oh gawd, she also quoted It Was A Good Day…….AGAIN.

      Homegirl, give it up.

  36. anon says:

    Instead of studying for exams, I just want to fix these outfits! Gah!! Donk, I know you NEVER read here, but just in case:

    No more donkey-hoove-clompers. Even Victoria Beckham looks like she has club feet in those stupid shoes.

    You look better chubbier. The extra meat in your red-haired phase… it looked like your face/body was at peace. Of course that a thousand cc’s of fillers-ago, and I’m not sure there is any going back.

    No opaque tights with sleeveless dress. No chunky earrings with chunky necklace. NEIN!

    Mess up your hair a little!!! Your stupid overly-symmetrical sausage curls make you look like an Asian transvestite or bargain bin Kim K.

    Turquoise terror – size UP, motherfucker! Absolutely ruined a not-terrible dress.

    Lacy grey sausages – this is salvageable. If the romper is not awful (it looks cheap) pair with opaque black tights and ankle booties. Seriously, lower your goddamn hemlines.

    Rachel zoe outfit – mess up your hair!!! And your tattooed on makeup!! dare I say it, if you’re going with that hobo-eclectic look, take some notes from the Olsen twins (wavy hair/clean face). And, really? Old lady earrings?

    I cannot imagine what bystanders at Fashion Week must think of this bisch…

    • Oh god says:

      YES! I agree with so much of this. I definitely think she looks a lot healthier and happier in that red-head phase, although I wish she’d stop getting harsh hair colors. She looks like a normal person in that white dress photo, minus the white dress monstrosity, obviously.

    • JFA - Still no one cares jackasshole says:

      Yes. The hair. I hate overly styled hair. Only okay for a goddamn wedding.

      • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

        Look at the hair in the Navy Nastiness outfit. Jesus motherfucking Christ. She went to Fashion Week with hair like that.

        • JFA says:

          I KNOW!!!!!! That hair is insanity!!!!! But almost EVERY HAIRDO is just….unspeakably bad. The sausage curls get worse the more I look at them.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            The longer the pelts, the worse they look — they not only add additional girth to her ginormous head, but they also draw down on her face, making it every bit as equine as SJP’s

            Then again, Donkey wants to emulate her …
            [img]http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_llu7iuIpvg1qaqlyro1_500.jpg[/img]
            Well done, Donkey, well done!

  37. Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

    You know, an actual donkey might look less out of place at Fashion Week than Julia does in these outfits. How does she manage to fail so hard?

  38. zandra says:

    Fuck – it must be SO exhausting trying to hide the left side of your face in photos. For YEARS at a time. Christ, she is a tool.

    All the clothes in these photos should be burned.

  39. Pink Ruffled Cheese says:

    Awww! I miss fat hipster Julia! The one with the customizable romper, removable side braid and kung fu grip action fun pack.

    • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

      Hipster Julia might make a curtain call if she keeps chasing hipster bros like Jelly.

      • pearipathetic donkey says:

        Yes, hipster Julia is one of my favorite’s as well. Her interpretation is so completely off the mark. She cannot even copy a look, like something about her just has to completely fuck it up.

    • so sorry, so fat says:

      bwahaha! fat hipster romper julia was a special treat, for serious… man, like all her other failed personality choices, she might as well have bought a costume at ricky’s for all the authenticity it had*

      *this hipster authentication process is based on my having lived in williamsburg from 2004-2011 (now out in bushwick)… and i can throw a stick out my window and hit multiple dudes in bands, with beards, wearing sunglasses.

      • Pink Ruffled Cheese says:

        Oh I’ve totally lived in Bushwick and pre-yuppie Williamsburg! Julia is the type of person who hangs out in Williamsburg NOW and thinks it’s “dangerous” and “edgy.”

      • JFA says:

        How do you like Bushwick? I’ve been in Williamsburg/Greenpoint for 11 years. I so love my apartment in Greenpoint now, but I long for cheaper rent and think about Bushwick sometimes because there is so much going on out there and I”m sure I can find something for cheaper. They are renting STUDIOS in Greenpoint for $1600 now. Granted those are often with yards and/or in new developments, but still. Bonkers. I spend about that much to live 8 blocks from the G TRAIN. Still love it though.

        • so sorry, so fat says:

          hey neighbor. i’ve been in bushwick for a little over a year now (off the jefferson stop), and actually really like it. i moved primarily because i was splitting up with my live-in dude and moving out of our rent-controlled spot on bedford and north 7th. it was a good decision for many reasons, the most general being that it’s obviously a much cheaper neighborhood, and also it’s nice to not be in the middle of such an increasingly crazy hood (just in terms of noise and volume of people).

          the part of bushwick that i live in is mostly hispanic families (central american, puerto rican, dominican) and white hipster people (close to the subway). we have a 24-hour organic market, and several other tokens of gentrification, but it’s not crazy expensive yet. My roommate and I pay $1600 for a big 2-bedroom a block from the subway. it’s a safe neighborhood, but it’s definitely still pretty shady in a lot of areas. 2 HUGE bonuses of the hood: there are amazing local produce places all over and really great taco joints.

          if you are ever looking at a place around here, i’d be happy to give you my opinion of the location (if it’s a sketchy street i avoid, etc) or grab a beverage.

  40. Peltergeist says:

    One thing that struck me about all of these photos was the shoes. (Mainly because I refuse to look at her head.) She gets the shoes wrong EVERY. TIME. It’s not just a case of her having terrible taste in hoof booties (hoofties?), it’s a total disconnect with the big picture. It’s like her fluffy mind went, “Shoes pretty. Dress pretty. Jewelry pretty. So JULIA PRETTY!”

    • pearipathetic donkey says:

      The thing about the shoes is that they are just so wrong on HER. Watch any late-night talk show and several actresses wear those hoof heels, but they look great, or at least don’t come off as a disaster like Julie. I don’t know what it is about her…

    • bitchface says:

      So JULIA PRETTY!!!! would be a good user name.

  41. oh, calm down Kevin; it's MONOGRAMMED!!!!!!!!! says:

    i had to vote for the one that horrified me that much, it made me de-lurk and join in. those fricken over the knee boots with that dress; wtf????

    • Princess WideStance says:

      Welcome! There is always a moment when she does something that finally breaks you. And you can lurk no more. Most of us here have had that moment, though I can’t seem to remember what mine was.

    • solidarity cat says:

      Yes, welcome! Stay awhile!

      [img]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_AUZHoNLV5io/Sy9C2XhGItI/AAAAAAAAAqg/krNTTrHzzIY/s320/CatWelcome.gif[/img]

  42. One Fat Melman says:

    Have you guys heard about the 95-year old socialite who keeled over at fashion week? Still looked better than Donkey…

    *Credit to my bf on that one; it was his first comment when he saw the article.

    • She's a cruel and strange bitch says:

      Donkey took a picture with her once and was all “This is going to be me! Gawker will still be writing about me!” No and no, Donkey. That woman has actually done a lot of work in with women’s rights in Africa. And she was awesome. Also, Gawker doesn’t care about you anymore now let alone in 70 years.

  43. pearipathetic donkey says:

    She’s lucky that she is a nobody, can you imagine all the worst dressed lists she’d be on?

  44. Casa Del Yay! (Squared) says:

    Kant decide.

    Although, have to say Frilly Shiny makes her look like a 12′ tall Na’vi threw up on her.

  45. another lurker says:

    hi catladies, long time lurker here–
    has asha always been at Columbia Business School ?? this is new, right ? apologies if this has been brought up before– and yet … no congrats from donk ! somebody must be totes jeals

    • CDB says:

      it is new for sure

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      That reminds me!
      I got my Harvard BS sweatshirt & MIT ball cap tonight 🙂

    • Andy Wintour hacks (up a furball) says:

      Speaking of, WHY does Cavuto keep putting that idiot on his show? First Facebook, now Apple? Because Apple really needs to figure out their mobile strategy! *facepalm*

      http://video.foxbusiness.com/v/1450830521001

      AND WHO THE FUCK IS SHE S TECH BLOGGER FOR? ” Ya know.”

      • Andy Wintour hacks (up a furball) says:

        I’m raging so hard I can’t type.

      • Sacred Scrapbooks says:

        Fox should hire her — it would raise the average IQ of their newsroom. Anyway, she does look great.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          She’s actually quite stunning when she’s not pointing at things, & how nice to see her forehead wrinkle, meaning that she’s not all needled-up w/ Botox a la Donkè.

          I don’t think she was half bad, but I’m not at all well-versed on the topic either, so maybe she was talking out her ass? She’ll probably land a regular on-air gig soon.

      • Sweaty Juicy Couture says:

        can’t view it!!? do you have to register with Fox News? gawd,
        they are really terrible if they are inviting Megtard on-air.

      • Albie Quirky says:

        She’s young and not white, two demographics they’re dying to reach.

      • delurkin fin says:

        Asha has as much relevance as the perpetual talking tool head Porter Bibb. Pretenders who have zero trading book and live to suck the corporate teat.

        Bloomberg Fox News and CNBC are viewed by finance professionals as a joke and part of the game. No one I know at major financial institutions think that CNBC or Bloomberg or *shudder* Fox Business News possesses ANY journalistic content. These shows are for the country club lounges in Alabama, Texas or Colorado, so the retired local executives can stare are Mandy Drury, pop off about what they bought or sold, and feel like a local BSD.

        The reason that CEOs go on this shows is because someone has to be on there, these channels are basically PR Newswise for the tele.

        Seriously, CNBC Bloomberg FNB are a joke. In fact, one media guy told me “Bloomberg feels that they would have millions of viewers if they just had a better position on the dial”. What a farce.

    • Fashion Girl says:

      I just looked it up and indeed, she is EMBA ’13. In other words, she’s in the Executive MBA program. Which basically means that your company/someone important to the school sponsors you, and you go to EMBA classes at night and on weekends. It circumvents the normal admissions process and is generally a moneymaker for any b-school, since your sponsor pays full-flight (i.e., there are no loans). There are some super-smart folks in EMBA and then there are….Meghans.

      • JFA says:

        Thank you for explaining this. Because I knew there was NO WAY IN HOT HELL this bidge to in through the normal admissions process. Absolutely no way. But whom does she even work for that would sponsor her? Meh who cares. She’s gonna get eaten alive.

  46. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

    Can anyone find & post Donkey’s Barbie FW video that the guy voiced-over?
    I’ve looked & looked for it … Professor Fuck Camping? Anyone?

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        Thank you!

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          WP, this video is a freaking mecca of screamgrabs, btw!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            One Shower Vom coming up!
            [img]http://i42.tinypic.com/1z4dgye.png[/img]

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Arkansas has the best dentists!
            [img]http://i39.tinypic.com/11ac2dv.png[/img]

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            One & 1/3rd glasses of wine, I swear!
            [img]http://i43.tinypic.com/290wr51.png[/img]

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            I wanted to call this: “Donkey Punch”
            [img]http://i44.tinypic.com/15wxg6s.png[/img]
            Captcha said: “Crash & Burn”

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            You BEST have some flowers for me, Jelly Donut!
            [img]http://i41.tinypic.com/123m9ep.png[/img]
            & chocolate! & frosting! & children mcnuggets!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            MEGATARD got in Business school?
            [img]http://i39.tinypic.com/s67thx.png[/img]
            TUCKER MAX got engaged before ME?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Quit fisting Jacy’s posts, YOU SHITHEADS!
            [img]http://i39.tinypic.com/nv13f5.png[/img]

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Did you know … ?
            [img]http://i43.tinypic.com/6eqhs3.png[/img]
            MATH IS HARD!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Jack McCain was HERE!
            [img]http://i44.tinypic.com/2dvndqw.png[/img]
            Ask me about the house WE shared!

          • Andy Wintour hacks (up a furball) says:

            You are having fun, aren’t you, Brayella? This video is the gift that keeps on giving. 🙂

            Related, I watched the video and the voice effects made me stop raging on the Meghtard crap. So funny!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Like I said to Loren …
            [img]http://i43.tinypic.com/16ks4g5.png[/img]
            O^0 SHIT!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Do you hear that?
            [img]http://i43.tinypic.com/2e56v53.png[/img]
            The little pitter patter of la burra hooves?

            I said …
            JELLY, DO YOU HEAR WHAT I HEAR?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            I have a fashun weak SqueeCast!
            [img]http://i39.tinypic.com/34t99hv.png[/img]
            Where I talk about everything EXCEPT fashun!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Why yes … YES I DO …
            [img]http://i44.tinypic.com/334pzt3.png[/img]
            … tell the internet ALL about my ex BF’s!

            What up, Jelly Donut? CALL ME!!!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            WHY? would I favor one side over the other?
            [img]http://i44.tinypic.com/28tl0k6.png[/img]
            WHO DOES THAT?

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Namaste, bitches!
            [img]http://i44.tinypic.com/2l8yzyt.png[/img]
            (I need my beauty sleep! Back at 3:00 p.m.)

          • supermassive black holes fka mule on rouge says:

            oh god, Brayella, I cannot breathe for laughing so hard!!!

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            🙂 I got myself tickled over ‘children mcnuggets’, but dammit, NOW I’M HUNGRY!

          • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

            Notice how badly wonkified her left eye is in those shots/that day? I believe it was a day after she’d skipped a day at FW, ostensibly because she was just SOOO UPSET about Dan, but it was clear it was an injection day and one hadn’t worked out so well. Her left eye is practically half-closed in all the shots taken of her that day, and her face looks totally fucked up. Oh honey.

          • so sorry, so fat says:

            ooooh developmentally delayed drunken pirate clown. my favorite.

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            Karma fucking her in the eye that day is just a small taste of what’s likely in store for her — Bitch deserves to be vilified for co-opting Dan’s cancer to garner sympathy for herself.

          • X Belt says:

            it’s not just the left eye – her left upper lip is motionless – actually drooping. WTF?! Why would you want something done to your face that makes you look like you have Bell’s palsy? Why?! And when the weird slow-speed voice talks about her red shoes “with little booowwwws on theeemmmm”… yeah. totally creeped me out. *shiver*

    • Mini Driver says:

      I don’t think this is voiced over, that’s Julia’s actual voice. Lengthening soundwaves by slowing audio produces a lower pitch that makes women sound masculine and everyone sound drunk, like in this slurring-dwarf video that was circulating a while back.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=woi_2Ay0Y-U

  47. Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

    Not quite sure why, but the baggy black pants make me smile. Probably because they are pearformance enhancing. They make her look like SUCH a pear.

  48. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    Oh, shit, Brayella, I have not laughed that fucking hard in a long, long time!!!!!!!!!!!!

  49. Julia's Too Small Tutu says:

    She thought that the Gucci name made that beat as hell looking bag a-ok to wear to FW.

  50. ShesJustStupid says:

    This made me laugh. Watch out, jellyd! Drama this way comes….

    Julia Allison @JuliaAllison
    “But I won’t let my spirit fail me, I won’t let my spirit go, until I get to my destination, I’m gonna take it slow. Step by step!” -Houston

    Julia Allison @JuliaAllison
    Zipping to the airport on this rainy, dark Friday morn, 6:30 am in New York, listening to Whitney’s “Step by Step” as I journey to SF. 🙂

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      Oh dear.

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        Her latest tweet says she’s in LA. Is she connecting to SF? Huh?

        • SchadenfreudianSlip says:

          What is wrong with her? Why did she tweet that last tweet? Was the “note from Celia” in tweet form or did she reach out directly to you in a more traditional sense, meaning TO YOU AND NOT THROUGH A PUBLIC PLATFORM???

          Look at me. Someone wants me on TV. I’m in demand. Look at me. Look at me.

          She sucks so very much.

  51. flaggedbythelab says:

    Reposting – I like the turquoise dress. However, the rest of the outfit (accessories and shoes) need an overhaul.

    [img]http://gifsoup.com/view/54943/miranda2-o.gif[/img]

  52. I know nothing about women’s fashion (or men’s for that matter) but I thought the point was to wear clothes that minimize your “flaws” and accentuate your body type and other features. She seems to do everything she can to do the opposite of this.

    • Sweaty Juicy Couture says:

      That is because she thinks she’s a STAR….she WANTS to stand out but does not understand that it’s just dreadful looking.
      Can we vote for ” All of them? ” since they are ALL so similar. Curious!!

      OT— but I clicked on Mary Rambin’s FB info page and there is NO mention of Co-founding, or being associated with Non-Society…..but they were BFF!!! she only lists “TMI Weakly” and omits the rest…… worrisome!

  53. Bouncing Little Burro says:

    I actually like the Garden Party dress minus her styling. Does anyone know what brand it is?

    Also, I like the grey blazer get up from the waist up (and from the chin down, natch). Everything else? lmfao

  54. Natasha says:

    I showed this to a coworker who didn’t think the outfits were “that bad”… I was shockeddd. I think that makes for a good litmus test for a person’s commonsense. Because 85% of these outfits are totally off-the-walls bonkers, and the other 15% are messed up by the accessories she chooses and those awful nude YSL hooves. And when you consider that she is supposed to be a professional at Fashion Week, representing herself and sometimes corporations, 100% of the outfits become completely unacceptable — the only ones that maybe skirt tolerability is the turquoise lace French Connection dress and the first retro-y floral dress. BUT THOSE SHOES WITH BOTH.

    • Natasha says:

      “the only ones that maybe skirt tolerability ARE”. so sorry, so fat/ungrammatical.

      I voted for the Valentine’s Day outfit with moon boots, although both are especially gruesome. Her worst sartorial side comes out around the holidays.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

        Her worst sartorial side comes out around the holidays.
        [img]http://25.media.tumblr.com/NB8YioMLihwjg6icE6BTKZQLo1_400.jpg[/img]

        • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

          Donkey looks uncomfortable and angry about standing next to someone significantly more attractive than she is. Brayge building, fist clenching…

          • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

            I just wanna know what she’s smuggling out of the church under that … that … coat … plus, there’s no real good reason for the gloves other than to avoid leaving hoof-prints, amirite?

        • Fueled by PMS & Chocolate says:

          I feel so embarrassed for her standing next to Allie who looks so nice and normal.

    • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

      I thought Lacy Gray Sausages was better than Donkey’s average, too.

      If the floral tablecloth one has a saving grace, it’s that her butt looks relatively good in it.

  55. Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

    Hopefully, Donkey is visiting Jelly D so she can borrow his doughnut costume to wear to Fashion Week. It might not be the least appropriate thing she’s worn to Fashion Week, either.

  56. Shamoo£ia says:

    I found the festering fake YSLs picture. Shudder.
    [img]http://i41.tinypic.com/10yi4ag.jpg[/img]

    • solidarity cat says:

      Uggggh! So Much Dirty.

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

      Ew! Nasty!

      Now I know why I couldn’t find it when trying to narrow colors down to ‘pink’ &/or ‘yellow’ … Google SE needs to implement the color choice ‘grime’ strictly for Julia Allison Baugher’s shoes & juicy sweats.

    • Peltergeist says:

      It enbrayges me that she can’t take a photo of anything without HER in it. Photo of shoes? Gotta get the diabetic feet in there. Photo of wheat grass juice? Gotta point at it. Just in case the hat0rz accuse her of claiming other people’s filthy shoes and plant drinks, I guess.

    • Princess WideStance says:

      If those are YSLs, I am a giraffe.

      • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

        Even if they are real, Donkey is so gauche for acting like Tom Ford made them himself from unicorn hide.

    • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

      She’s leaving her shoes in the middle of the aisle on a plane. Don’t worry, entitled Donkey, that won’t be inconvenient for anyone or a safety hazard or anything.

      • Helena (Ouroboros of Fail) says:

        I know, right!? I think this photo sums up pretty much everything that’s wrong with the donkey:

        1) Shoes are grotesquely hideous in the first place, but
        2) just in case they didn’t look repulsive enough, Donkey adorns them with GRIME; in all seriousness, I really don’t think I’ve ever seen a PHOTO of shoes that were this dirty; sure, dirty shoes happen, but normal and even semi-normal people don’t take pics of them, and NO ONE with any semblance of self awareness would admit to the world that this is what their shoes look like WHILST trying to convey “pretty pink princess! worship and marry me, boys!!”
        3) must include hind legs in photo, cuz they’re tho thexay;
        4) hooves must be clad in pink because tee hee girliest girly girl ever! Worship and marry me, YOU SHITHEADS!
        5) nasty shoes put in the middle of the aisle, because Donkey’s demented will is the only thing that matters;
        6) photo gets posted on the internet, for the whole world to marvel, worship and marry.

        High status markers all around, ay?

    • Tremendous Liar; Donkey Repugnant says:

      I don’t really understand why Donkey likes these so much. She acts like they’re being YSLs means that they are priceless historical artifacts or something. If the Marina del Bray apartment were on fire with Toilet Julia and Lilly trapped inside, I’m sure Donkey would bravely swoop back into the flames. To retrieve the OMG YSLs.

    • Jacy "Donk" LaRue Jacy "Donk" LaRue says:

      OH JESUS I JUST ATE

    • Greg says:

      38H = Economy class. She can’t get someone to cough up for a J-class ticket?

      Those shoes are disgustink.

  57. Lurker says:

    I’m a total lurker but just had to ask if Masha is trying to connect to any of you on LinkedIn? I got an invite from her this morning. Weird!

    • juliaspublicist cried his rhinestone off juliaspublicist says:

      Can someone explain to me about Meghan and business school? Where did we find this out?

      • JFA says:

        Does she actually go to Columbia? WTF???? One of my ex’s was literally brilliant, phenom test scores and undergrad GPA etc etc and he got dinged. She is a moron. Does not compute.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Black says:

          Fashion Girl explains it HERE.

          • JFA says:

            I just saw that. Thank GOD. I started having serious doubts about the universe. I’ll give her some props. At least she’s doing something unlazy to further her career, as opposed to just making ugly scarves or couch surfing.

  58. Dog Yapping & Donkey Tears says:

    Did we parse this????

    From a Donkey’s Facebook –

    Ladies & gentlemen, my roommate Julia Price. Just try to wrap your head around the self-esteem issues I have living with a life sized doll!! Good thing she’s so sweet. haaha (Photo taken by me!) — with Julia Price Ilowiecki.

    Toilet Julia – sleep with one eye open.

  59. Bunburying says:

    Hello lovely cat ladies and cat gents. Apologies in advance to CDB, but I’ve been running errands at my desk 80 hours/week and haven’t had much time to check in lately.

    Can someone please explain to me the desperate Jelly D e-mail that Julia sent and/or link me to where this was announced?

    Thank you!

  60. Can-Swiss says:

    Looks like Party Pants forgot to renew GOMI. I am getting a Go Daddy page when I visit.

Comments are closed.