Same Donkey, Different Frantic Pointless Last Minute Trip to LA

Thankfully, very little changes in ye olde Donkeyland. That means we can roll out TRAVEL BINGO again, unchanged! Runyon and Earth Bar and meetings acne, oh my! The rest of our handy dandy bingo cards can now be found here.

 
UPDATE! 


 

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224 Responses to Same Donkey, Different Frantic Pointless Last Minute Trip to LA

  1. Crazy Burro says:

    1st!

  2. Tribune Slingbacks says:

    Does last night count for a “Drank alcohol OMG” square?

    • Prof. F Camping, Doctor of Donkology says:

      absolutely. in fact, i think i already have four or so bingo squares down. Imminent Meltdown is #winning, though.

      • Imminent Meltdown says:

        Oh, hey, Thanx!
        (I thought I was going to be called out as vain for using the
        “… oh my!” schtick again.)
        At this point, we could have four Bingo/Donkey squares.
        Chicago
        NewYork
        LA/SF
        Weddings

        • mcakes: Taste the passion! says:

          For what it is worth, we ought to have the items listed, with the ‘free lilly’ square stationary, and then we all place them ourselves and post our own cards. That way we can actually call out a winner.

          That is what I do with vocabulary bingo with my students.

          Totally lame idea, maybe, but then we’d all be working for our own bingo, and pulling for our own specific empty square, just like the real game!

  3. Jacy says:

    Also, the acne post. Jesus, what a mystery.

    She plasters eight tons of makeup on her face whenever she goes out in public, doesn’t sleep, consumes a ton of sugar and, apparently, gluten if her “high tea” intake was any indication, and creates unnecessary stress for herself every fucking time she flies somewhere, which is all the fucking time. Tough to figure out why she’s got acne.

    • KashMoney says:

      To be fair, acne in equines is extremely rare.

    • Imminent Meltdown says:

      Karma.

    • Syndicated Slambook says:

      I had mysterious adult acne, and I chalked it up to wheat/refined sugar/etc. Then I went to my dermatologist like a responsible adult, and he LITERALLY LOL’ED when I told him I had modified my diet to try and fix it. Just go to a g-d doctor, lady. The Intarwebs will not help.

      • JFA says:

        Yeah he probably Loled because that’s utter bullshit and food doesn’t cause or relieve acne.

        Jesus people are there no real acne sufferers here? It’s not food, it’s not makeup and it’s not stress. At least not for many people.

        • jpa says:

          I never had a pimple until I hit my 20s. Basically my derm said it was hormonal. BUT I will say there is something to be said for overall health and homegirl aint healthy.

        • Up, Up and Cray says:

          Makeup can cause it, if it’s not removed properly. I have a feeling the Donkarina doesn’t remove her makeup properly each night.

    • Expert Gay says:

      Seriously, I blame the makeup more than anything else. God knows how much foundation she uses. Modifying her diet might help, but most people don’t break out when they have cupcakes or chocolate, so I’m guessing it’s biology.

      • I'm guessing it's biology says:

        Nope. It’s not biology.

        It’s just cuz she’s a fucking loon.

    • New Year New You says:

      So once again she admits she’s been eating teh glutinous foodstuffs even though she’s got really, really srs bidness, killer level celiac disease. Okay Julia.

      And why is she emailing her REALLY REALLY SMART SAVVY FRIEND about acne? Call your fucking dermatologist you moron. Call Dr Bobby. Call your Ceiling Cats doctor. I don’t understand the point of her stupidities.

      • FIEIRCE Mani says:

        I think it because she is really asking us…because why post an email like that?? But she never reads here so maybe not. My question. Where is this acne? Her recent close ups at the last wedding dinner didn’t reveal any acne. Maybe I don’t want to know where the acne is….ew.

        • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

          #AcneIsCodeForGreenSkintags

          • New Year New You says:

            Seriously right, it’s “vaginal acne”. ‘Cos let’s face it #foreversingle Julia has been putting it about a bit over the last few years.

      • featherbrained says:

        I think the friend is Tim Ferris.

    • Imminent Meltdown says:

      She should have figured this out by now. She is going from a humid plain to an arid desert. She needs to cut down on the make-up/petroluem products and drink more water.
      Does she wear foundation when “hiking” Runyon?
      *Shivers*

    • diluted brain says:

      As always, Jacy, I agree with you 100%. It’s definitely the diet & make-up. Though, I’ve noticed for the first time ever, I have little break-outs either from coming off the pill or sweat from working out. Imagine she got off the pill for Pancakes, but I’m sure she never would be on it to begin with.

      • JFA says:

        YEah it’s actually not. There is no real cure for acne and often no discernible cause and you can get it at any point in your life. I can wear makeup, not wear makeup, use topicals, not use them – and it comes and goes and there’s not much I can do about it I’ve tried everything including Accutane which I had to stop because of bad side effects.

        Some people just have acne and it sucks.

        • tonyamichaela says:

          So true! I had really bad acne in my teen years, and I used prescription creams. They made a huge difference, but my skin never was clear and would get really irritated from the creams. Like, red, peeling, oily, and pimply all at the same time. Then, when I was 20, my skin just magically cleared up. I just wash it at night, and I rarely have any zits. Some people are the opposite and don’t get acne until they’re adults.

          • JFA says:

            Yeah from what I remember numerous dermatologists telling me, it’s not what you eat and it’s probably not stress, and you can get it at any point in life and there is not really any known cure. I’m using a proactiv like cleanser now that I bought on the cheap at Duane Reade because I refuse to pay all for proactiv, and my skin is dry as all fuck. I actually think the half course of Accutane was helpful, as I never break out as bad as I was before I started it. But I’ve had this shit on and off for like 20 years and I know it’s nothing I do or don’t do. I’ve also been on and off birth control and that never totally cured it either. Sometimes my skin is perfect and sometimes it looks like ass.

          • darling dearest says:

            I am the opposite. not really a big deal when i was a teenager and then mid 20s — some weird cystic action. but im a poor so i dont go to the dermatologist

        • Live Dependently says:

          I think there is hormonal acne, or the type you’re talking about, which isn’t triggered by diet or makeup and can’t be cured by modifying it, and there are also breakouts caused by topical products. I definitely break out when I try almost any skin care products. Overtime I’ve figured out through trial and error what I can use. I visit makeupalley.com and the girls on the skin care board there can figure out which active ingredients may trigger breakouts but I have no idea what ingredient it is I need to avoid. I know the type of acne you’re talking about is different though. My boyfriend had bad acne on his back and eventually resorted to Accutane too. Based on what it did to him I’m surprised it’s legal.

          I do think stress and not sleeping could affect hormones so in that way it seems possible they could be involved in breakouts. There are studies finding cortisol related to every problem under the sun but then people oversimplify and attribute many problems that have a complicated etiology to stress.

          The other thing is I read about all of Julia’s makeup on some blog once and some of the stuff she was using seemed really old. She might not get acne from it but if she keeps it ages and doesn’t clean the brush each time she’s going to get an infection.

    • JFA says:

      Meh, I’ll give her a pass about acne. I suffer from it on and off and probably will forever, no matter what I do. But she needs to STFU about it because no one cares.

      • SchiapWTF says:

        I got terrible acne/rosacea in my late 30s, the thing that works for me (most of the time but not when the seasons change and I get sweatier) is Dr. Wexler’s stuff from Bath and Body Works. It’s totally expensive but magic, at least for me.

        Did I tweet about it? Did I post emails about it? No, I talked about it with friends/family and I tried things until I hit upon what worked for me. I’m not sure why this pink dim bulb needs to broadcast every little disturbance in the donkosphere.

      • wonkeye says:

        Service alert: My hairdresser, whose skin looks gorgeous, told me she used to have really bad acne, but uses Murad’s acne line and that completely clears it up. I don’t know which products, because my skin is more dry and rosacea-like, but just figured I’d share the info.

        • Pancakes with a side of pancakes with a side of cray cray says:

          YES! Murad is amazing. I swear by it.

  4. Imminent Meltdown says:

    Did she just post a picture of wheatgrass juice from EarthBar? Scary.

    • Prof. F Camping, Doctor of Donkology says:

      FFFUUUUUUUUUU she has taken that identical photo 10 millionty times. pointing at a green juice with sausage snappers.

      also: OMG! I need to meet him! RT @united: Our most frequent flyer, Tom Stuker, reaches a milestone – 10 million miles flown!

      • New Year New You says:

        Yeah that shot needs to go on to the bingo card now, maybe in place of the sushi. Also, we haven’t had any airport shots for a long time.

        Also also, her dead person paw-hooves really creep me out.

      • KrakenSkulls says:

        OMG! I need to meet him!

        OMG! No you don’t!

        Yes Donkey! Mr. Stuker’s reward for wasting more of his life than anyone else in an aluminum coffin reading SkyMall, fighting for elbow space with bratty kids, and having a last name that rhymes with “Fucker” is to meet Z-List Celebrity and Almost-Platinum-Club Member Julie Gergallson live in person! Maybe you can share stories about those total assholes who work at United that you hate so much!

        • Jacy says:

          This is a very funny comment.

          Seriously, why is she so titillated by flying?

          • JFA says:

            Travel is the only thing in life she does consistently.

          • mcakes: Taste the passion! says:

            It’s like she watched half of ‘Up in the Air’ and left before someone complained to management about not enforcing the ‘no livestock’ policy.

          • krakenskulls says:

            *gets all serious*

            imagine the tossed bone in 2001.

            picture Julia age 12ish riding her bike to the country home for that forbidden solo birthday party.

            now jump ahead to Julia age 30, still hoping something magical is going to happen when she lands somewhere she wasn’t before.

      • diluted brain says:

        yeah, that tweet was lame. Let’s tweet an airline – – soooo cool, I see why you have so many friends, donkey. It’s pretty sad to be proud of that & I’d wager Tom actually has a real job that makes his need to fly matter outside of sleeping on friends couches in the city on a whim.

      • Sausage Snappers says:

        Julia really should stop ringing me.

    • Expert Gay says:

      Why does she have to point to everything? IT MAKES NO SENSE. IT’S NOT LIKE THERE ARE 50 ITEMS IN THAT PHOTO. THE FOCUS IS CLEARLY THE JUICE. WHY ARE YOU PHOTOGRAPHING YOUR JUICE ANYWAY. GOOD LORD.

      I’m not sure why this, of all things, induced my brayge. It’s been a long day.

      • Prof. F Camping, Doctor of Donkology says:

        seriously!!!!!eleven

        [img]http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lhpb7tZ7Jg1qz6dlko1_400.jpg[/img]

        [img]http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lmquyzxMgn1qz6dlko1_400.jpg[/img]

        and that’s just from the past four months.

        • Expert Gay says:

          omg. I wasn’t even aware of those.

        • New Year New You says:

          I want her to start photographing it when it comes out the other end, it would break up the monotony a little.

        • Princess WideStance says:

          She just can’t stand NOT having a piece of herself in a photo.

        • Julie's Facial Hair says:

          Her fingers are shaped like her legs.

          • Jacy says:

            Digits often are, don’t you find? I always find it quite fascinating. You can almost tell how someone’s built by seeing a photo of their fingers and toes. Her feet sort of fit in with her general body type as well.

        • jpa says:

          maybe this is a follow up to the coffee photo series that is in the queue?

        • Ms Melty Pelty says:

          UGHHHH RAAAAAAAGE. Oh how I HATE her disgusting fingers pointing to her disgusting drinks/book pages/menus. Point to something that MATTERS. She reminds me of that kid in school who always had to touch everything, especially when you told them not to. Gross.

        • JFA says:

          It’s not just sausage fingers, they are all weird and pudgy except at the tip where they are all skinny. Bitch really does have ugly hands I don’t know why she feels the need to photograph them constantly. I have club thumbs and I would never be posting them constantly online.

      • diluted brain says:

        this comment made me laugh…. she really does point at everything!

        • Expert Gay says:

          Meghan did it way better. I always found her pointing habit endearingly goofy.

    • Effing Ineffably Un-Effable says:

      Oh my gosh I’m in Los Angeles I’ll hike Runyon Canyon and drink wheatgrass, eleventy.

      SO. PREDICTABLE. SO. BORING.

      Her Los Angeles authenticity costume is so boring, especially since we just had a friend come out who inexplicably wanted to go running in the mornings. Except the friend *never runs*… and neither do we.

      LA is not some weird mecca of healthy living where everyone’s only eating organic free-range tofu on bulrush plates and spending a third of the day at the gym, only leaving to run and get a high colonic and then finishing the night at the soho club getting high on high-quality, legal weed. There are plenty of rascal-driving, Adam Richman worshiping, non-recycling people here. I don’t know why she pretends it’s unlike anywhere else.

      Also, she needs to try a new hike. Runyon is so fucking overrated.

      • New Year New You says:

        I hope all my tofu is free range.

        • Effing Ineffably Un-Effable says:

          Caged tofu is hella juicy and tender. But so much cruelty.

          • I Wear Plaid Flannel in July, Ironically says:

            tofu foie gras; the guilt is overwhelming, but the taste ….

          • mcakes: Taste the passion! says:

            Vegan foie gras:

            [img]http://www.quarrygirl.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/10-celebration-roast.jpg[/img]

            Fucking delish.

          • waffleycakes says:

            Wait, is that a Field Roast? Because those things actually are fucking delish. Just need to slice it super thin and add some tofurkey giblet gravy.

            >.>

      • moonshineDONKEY says:

        Runyon is the most despised scene/”hiking” in L.A. She can’t even be bothered to try and look as cool as she thinks she is. What a fucktard. I’m not going to even give her the benefit of knowing the sweet hiking spots. I don’t want donkey dung to smell up the path.

        Why don’t you try being original for ONCE IN YOUR LIFE? …she must be holding out hope that she’ll run into her omfgEGGERS boytoy at Runyon.

        • Effing Ineffably Un-Effable says:

          Well, this is always the way. It’s not like she’s gonna carve out a mean portion of K-town as her own or do what every other Angeleno does and make their own image of the city. Nope, starfucker map to over-ten-years-ago bullshit!

      • JFA says:

        She needs to just move to LA already. She obviously wants to fit in and belong there and I’ve always thought in some ways it would be perfect for her there. Please don’t attack me LA people. We put up with her for long enough on the east coast, and she so obviously can’t stand being in Chicago.

        Get a job and move, fucking lameass, like an adult.

        • JFA says:

          It’s amazing, this entire time, she’s really just never going to get a job. Ever. And this whole marry rich thing isn’t obviously happening.

        • Jacy says:

          But that would mean she would have to pay rent! Surrrely you don’t expect a 30-year-old woman to support herself??!?!

  5. bettedavis says:

    I LOLed at this exchange. She is drinking wine and answering questions for the WEDDING NEWSLETTER? By way of a backward compliment, we find out Julia didn’t know that “her girl” Aubrey is a freelancer? Good fucking grief.

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    Marriage Advice in 140: Respect. Trust. Friendship. Always hold hands when fighting. And remember these 5 words: “Divorce is not an option.”
    15 hours ago

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    In other news: I really wish I were eating a plate of gnocchi right now.
    16 hours ago

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    One glass of wine and I already had a mini sobbing meltdown. Awesome! This stuff really works!!!
    17 hours ago

    brit Brittany Bohnet
    @
    @JuliaAllison @Aubs I second the “why are we having this conversation on Twitter” question.
    16 hours ago Favorite Retweet Reply

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    @
    @Aubs @brit – I had NO FREAKING IDEA. You’re really, really good. Why are we having this conversation on Twitter? LOL
    17 hours ago

    @JuliaAllison @brit Hold on, really? You didn’t know I’ve been a freelance writer for 12 years? Guess I don’t do it (or publicize it) enough
    17 hours ago Favorite Retweet Reply

    Aubs Aubrey Sabala
    @
    @JuliaAllison Try drinking BEFORE writing. And no matter what you do, DO NOT – I repeat, DO! NOT! – get online after an Ambien. HIDE THE PC.

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    @
    @Aubs @Brit – Well, THAT explains it. I was like “Damn, girl! You can WRITE!” I can’t wait for the answer to “Where is my husband already!?”
    17 hours ago

    rachelsklar rachelsklar
    @
    @Aubs @juliaallison @brit #somanyrodeos #wisdommakesushotter 🙂
    17 hours ago

    @JuliaAllison You know I used to be a relationship writer, yeah? And I have the best bad date stories EVER. #NotMyFirstRodeo (cc: @Brit)

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    @
    @astrologyzone – Yeah, this whole “being alone” thing really stinks.
    17 hours ago

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    @
    @Aubs – Your answers are intimidating me!!!
    17 hours ago
    »

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    I’ve only had one glass, but you know what? It’s been quite helpful at diminishing that pesky “over-thinking one’s writing” problem.
    17 hours ago
    »

    JuliaAllison Julia Allison
    I’ve never tried drinking while writing, but my darling friend @Brit has me (& @Aubs) answering wedding guests’ love questions. Thus: wine.
    17 hours ago

    • bettedavis says:

      Sorry guys, I didn’t see that this was screengrabbed in the last post. Um. Er. Oops?

      • Imminent Meltdown says:

        It happens. Some of us *cough*Me*cough* have done it. Please, stick around, ok?

      • mcakes: Taste the passion! says:

        I didn’t notice how brit said, “Why are we having this convo over twitter?” sentiment.

        aka: Stop broadcasting MY life along with your pathetic ‘existence.’

    • jpa says:

      holy shit, she’s insane.

    • Tremendous Liar; Donkey of Repugnance says:

      WHY is she giving marriage advice?! She can’t sustain a relationship for more than a few visits (because having friends or partners in your city of residence is clearly preposterous).

    • Edward R. Burro says:

      “I’ve only had one glass, but you know what? It’s been quite helpful at diminishing that pesky “over-thinking one’s writing” problem.”

      She OVERTHINKS her writing? I die.

  6. juliaspublicist cried his rhinestone off juliaspublicist says:

    Did anyone notice in her comments that Britt and Allie are also in LA and that Jules is excited to see them. I wonder why they are there? Oh, I don’t know. A DYING GRANDFATHER PERHAPS?

  7. Dog-Yapping & Donkey Tears (Pelt-a-Polozza) says:

    If this is ever updated: “Shout outs to her awesome (management) team!”

    PS This is my favorite show on TV

  8. Captain Gary says:

    I like how she says, in her latest fawn over Kate Middleton, that “William’s a lucky man!”

    You mean BESIDES being heir to a throne, HE’S lucky because he got to marry Kate Middleton? Isn’t it, I dunno, THE OTHER WAY AROUND? SHE”S A NORMAL PERSON WHO MARRIED INTO ROYALTY! I. JUST. KANT!!!

    Sorry for the crazy caps, but seriously.

    • diluted brain says:

      Because she is probably an in the closet lesbian like I’ve thought for some time. Most normal women would say “Wow Kate has great style but she’s lucky to be married to Wills” Bu not that donkey! Always drools over the ladies.

      • Captain Gary says:

        And honestly, it’s easy to have great style when you have the financial backing of an entire sovereign country. My guess — and I’m just guessing here — is that her handlers don’t really acquiesce to her requests to go out wearing sweatpants.

        • Imminent Meltdown says:

          Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge!
          Help me out here, Catladies.

          • Captain Gary says:

            I don’t have to call her that — I’m ‘Merican. We fought a revolution! USA!

        • Brayniac says:

          But what if they are of the tasteful and classy velour variety with the words Princess written across the ass in pink letters? I mean, that is the epitome of grace and elegance and one would assume that her handlers would be open to that possibility.

        • BunnyBingo says:

          Exactly – Kate is being managed by a whole team of people who ensure she is dressed/styled appropriately for her role. She is not just prancing round boutiques picking out whatever she feels like wearing. Julia has no concept of the weight of responsibility on the head of someone like Kate Middleton, just sees the la-di-da married a prince side of it.

          • mcakes: Taste the passion! says:

            Hypothetical: if someone tried to dress JA, would she permit it? If she did, how would she find a way to fuck it up/donkey hoof it?

          • Worrisome Pelts is applying to a PhD program in Knitting And Robotics! says:

            @mcakes: Ask Mary.

    • moonshineDONKEY says:

      “I don’t know if she wants tah BE ME or SKIN ME and wear me like last yeah’s Versace.”

    • Jacy says:

      That comment was downright lustful. She said she was “in love” with Kate Middleton underneath a shot where the wind is blowing up her dress and you almost catch a glimpse of beaver. And then right after that the “Wills is a lucky man” post. I am surprised she didn’t post the one where you can actually see Kate’s ass. Jesus, Donkey. We get it. You’re hot for her. Just own it. Embrace the inner lesbian. It’s OK.

  9. Imminent Meltdown says:

    JP, Jacy and Prof.
    If I may, for your consideration: the Chicago Bingo/Donkey card

    Fat Melmen/Hub 51/ChiClubParis
    OMGDowntownCondo
    Momsters & Dadster Lakefront Home
    PancakeHouse (Ouch)
    Grunella’s Stripmall Haus-O-Polyester Prom Frock Shoppe
    Braying on Local TV

    • Prof. F Camping, Doctor of Donkology says:

      don’t forget
      @bodyfitlab with the trainer!
      driving up lakeshore drive while tweeting!
      meetings with TMS team!

      • Effing Ineffably Un-Effable says:

        Bodyfitlab won’t last long enough to be a thing, IMO. She’ll be too OMG busy.

      • Powerful Moms with Fantastic Sons (aka Cindy McCain's Medicine Cabinet) says:

        University Club! That’s the place she’s always braying about with Dadsers, right?

    • Prof. F Camping, Doctor of Donkology says:

      see new bingo card above!

  10. Handbag Stuffed With Hair Is Veree Bizee (Tick Tock!) says:

    OT and god in heaven knows how dense I am to have missed this, but I just began watching the ‘Mary Tyler Moore’ DVD box set after getting it from a friend my own age. I’ve watched the first five episodes, and besides being nostalgic and wonderful and awesome television, I realized: Jaba The Loon doesn’t really think she’s Candace Bushnell or Carrie Bradshaw. HO THINKS SHE IS MARY RICHARDS, and JA, like mustard, CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF.

    • Julia's Too Small Tutu says:

      Lest we forget that Mary Richards had a job, which still seems to elude Donks. Could you imagine putting a nightly news show in her hands? It would be all Kate Middleton all the time.

    • Jacy says:

      I think we’re giving her too much credit. I bet she hasn’t ever seen the show, and if she has, has angrily determined it “sexist.”

  11. monster says:

    notice how “I miss my bunnies” is no longer applicable – she has no bunnies.

  12. Mini Driver, Intergalactic Bully says:

    Yay, I made this bingo card! I like to think that Julia stopped using the term “bunnies” as a direct result of its publication (it got reblogged on a few Tumblrs). Her employment of “bunnies” ground to a halt immediately afterward, almost as if she had been hit with a (to borrow a term of art from Tamra Barney) cyst and decease.

  13. Again, Feel Free to Relax says:

    [Christi_VS 1 hour ago in reply to juliaallison]
    Chin acne is almost always related to hormone surges (which is why many women breakout there before menstruating) – which is why the birth control pill is regularly prescribed for acne, since it regulates one’s hormones and prevents huge surges in testosterone.

    I think if you’re looking for a food related acne reason for your forehead, if it’s near/in between your eyes, it’s related a lack of leafy greens in your diet.

    [juliaallison [Moderator] 29 minutes ago in reply to Christi_VS]
    Ohhh this is good – I did get this break out right before my cycle – and I am not on birth control

    • Again, Feel Free to Relax says:

      Paging Worrisome Pelts – Operation ABP

    • Jacy says:

      Of COURSE she’s not on birth control. Pancakes … bullet dodged, my friend. Bullet dodged.

      • diluted brain says:

        I totally referred to birth control above at 7:20pm according to the time stamp. She answered this soon after. Do you think she reads here then answers herself from our comments? Fucking crazy, man. I knew she wouldn’t be on BCP either.

        • FIEIRCE Mani says:

          It happens so much I think she does…I also think she puts stuff out there to see what we would say and get ideas. After all we are some very smart cats.

        • Tremendous Liar; Donkey of Repugnance says:

          She doesn’t do BCP; she does BPC. Yes, bunnies, extreme malnutrition is an effective method of birth control.

      • JFA says:

        I believe she’s not on birth control because hasn’t she said it makes her crazy? She always used to be whining about finding a “non hormonal” method. She’s a fucking pussy.

        • Mini Driver, Intergalactic Bully says:

          Yeah, I seem to remember her getting into some crazed fight with Mary and/or Meghan back in the TMI Weakly days. She blamed her aggression on birth control.

          • JFA says:

            Keep blaming the birth control on the crazy, honey. You keep telling yourself that.

          • mcakes: Taste the passion! says:

            @JFA — word on that. The JA in my life is always looking for ‘non-hormonal’ birth control because she claims that BC makes her ‘crazy.’

            Nah, sweet cheeks. The crazy makes you crazy. The birth control just gives you an excuse.

            Side note: I think the real reason BC makes the JAmyL ‘crazy’ is because she is baby crazy, and secretly resents anything that keeps her from her objective of popping out props that love her unconditionally, and forcing some man into a binding contract.

          • Live Dependently says:

            One type made me kind of crazy, I told the doctor and he prescribed a different one with a different hormone. I doubt every pill on the market could make her crazy. Maybe if a hormonal imbalance is at all involved in her craziness and/or acne the right pill could help.

          • JFA says:

            Totally, she can try different pills. She really is the biggest pill pussy and it’s so nauseating already. “OH I hate taking advil even!” Shut up ass. You need about 2 different mood stabilizers and some xanax.

        • Amuse-douche says:

          I’m sorry, but I hate this comment. I was 19 when I first tried birth control and spiraled into uncontrollable depression and suicidal tendencies. It was so unlike my natural disposition I knew something was terribly wrong and I needed help. Went to my mom, and then my doctor, talked for awhile, and was told to stop taking the pill. Two months later I was back to my normal self and not crying myself to sleep every night.
          I tried lower dose estrogen pills in the years following after and had similar reactions, and finally had a permanent mark put on my medical records – any gyno who prescribes me any kind of birth control (especially implants or shots) can risk losing their medical license. Even if I wanted to be on birth control it’s simply not an option for me, but I’m no pussy.

          • Up, Up and Cray says:

            One of my best friends has the exact same problem. Her body simply can’t handle the hormones, apparently. She’s tried at least 3 separate times over the course of like 8 years – no dice.

            That being said, JA’s probably a pussy and lying like a damn fool about it.

          • My nostrils are TOTALLY symmetrical! Oo says:

            I agree here, I had a terrible hormonal reaction to bc pills. I was depressed and angry and had migraines you wouldn’t believe. Some women really can’t take anything that alters hormones guys. We’re not pussies.

          • JFA says:

            I believe that could happen to some people, surely. I just think she likes to bitch and moan about how she hates taking any meds because she thinks it’s makes her interesting or strong or something.

          • Sad Rat In Sidewalk says:

            Seconded, amuse-douche – those hormones can do some really fucked-up things to you. For me it’s physical symptoms. I’m a pretty avid runner (ran XC in high school) and whenever I’m put on *any* kind of birth control pill, my stomach bloats up like a balloon and my boobs get so sore that I can’t run or do any other high-impact workout. It also, oddly enough, makes my acne worse rather than better.

        • I Wear Plaid Flannel in July, Ironically says:

          i think birth control pills are a really bad idea; i’ve never taken them. the cancer, the strokes, the hormones.

          iud in long term relationship

          i personally believe women are fools for taking the pill; it’s a massive dose of very powerful hormones

          the iud works just fine

          • peltskank says:

            The copper IUD can cause heavier periods and worse cramps, though. I originally went on HBC to counteract both of those things, so that’s not a particularly appealing option.

          • solidarity cat says:

            I’ve had trouble with all forms of hormonal birth control. It’s really hard for some people to find something hormonal that works with your chemistry. The latest thing I tried was a diaphragm which was a laughable experiment. I’m embarrassed to say that now me and the huscat pull and pray & kind of try to factor where I am in my cycle, not the I recommend that to anyone. But we’re thinking of trying to have kittens starting this fall so we really aren’t risking that much should we mess up. But in the past, when there was been more at stake, it was a real issue and I never came up with a satisfactory solution.

          • solidarity cat says:

            * tried the the diaphragm as a non-hormonal solution. It’s great for some people esp if you are in a committed relationship but it was way to cumbersome for a klutz like me.

          • JFA says:

            It actually reduces the risk of ovarian cancer, and my grandmother died of that at 40. I’m glad I was on the pill for a long time, it also helps regulate periods for people with such issues (I have them).

          • JFA says:

            “Studies have consistently shown that using OCs reduces the risk of ovarian cancer. In a 1992 analysis of 20 studies of OC use and ovarian cancer, researchers from Harvard Medical School found that the risk of ovarian cancer decreased with increasing duration of OC use. Results showed a 10 to 12 percent decrease in risk after 1 year of use, and approximately a 50 percent decrease after 5 years of use (5).” Just being servicey. Ovarian cancer scares the shit out of me.

    • tonyamichaela says:

      I think the question she meant to ask was: “Hello readers, my diet isn’t arbitrarily restricted enough, so what foods should I add to the banned list this time?”

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        A(nother) food restriction will certainly come in handy this weekend when Britt & Allie et al are trying to give their undivided attn to a dying grandfather instead of a (mentally) sick donkey suffering devastating hunger pains & life-threatening acne …

        #HOWDAREHE?

      • Tremendous Liar; Donkey of Repugnance says:

        Dear Donkey: did you know that 70% of your weight is water? You’d be so tiny&cute without all that excess water! Also, water allergies are very common and are killing all the girls. Try cutting all water out of your diet!

  14. Imminent Meltdown says:

    At my amazeballz lawyers Morris Yorn signing a contract we’ve been working on for almost 10 months. Hallelujah!!

    Meeting. Score!

    Ok. I’m out. Have a Great Weekend, Catsisters!

    • Prof. F Camping, Doctor of Donkology says:

      but was it…DRACONIAN?! inquiring catminds must know!
      Dance Donkey!

    • Naansociety says:

      Oh, crap, what tone-deaf company is letting her do ANYTHING? #makesnosense

    • JFA says:

      I think “contractual negotiations leading to nothing” should be on a bingo card somewhere. We know you are forever meeting your agents/lawyers and yet, golly, nothing ever comes of it, I wonder why!

    • JFA says:

      Also LOL I’m quite certain they put in many billable hours over these 10 months on your sad little contract. Fuck you. That is called “no one cares enough to bother” in legal terms.

    • Dog-Yapping & Donkey Tears (Pelt-a-Polozza) says:

      PS, I CALLED HER DOING A SHOUT-OUT TO HER AMAZING TEAM!!!!!!!!!!!

      What did I win?

  15. Dog-Yapping & Donkey Tears (Pelt-a-Polozza) says:

    ORTHO-DONK-TIST = AWESOME!!!!!!

  16. CUNTbunnies! says:

    [img]http://i53.tinypic.com/d5zkp.jpg[/img]

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      LOL’g @ the Lorraine Swanson white shorts!
      Why you no thin-cut Donkey a square crotch?

    • Jacy says:

      Her face in the brown jumpsuit, taken from one of that infamous TV appearance when she looks like a Botoxed Muppet. Priceless. This might be a good banner!

    • FIEIRCE Mani says:

      LOL! No skydiving face? Even without it….priceless. It really is shocking to see her different faces. Jacy is right, the one on the far right is…um….shocking.

      • Dog-Yapping & Donkey Tears (Pelt-a-Polozza) says:

        Cuntbunnies, I want to french you hard on the mouth!

        PS, can I have your email again?? Have some work for you!

  17. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    JuliaAllison: William and Kate just drove by CAA headquarters, where I am. I screamed. Yes. Like a 9-year-old at a Justin Bieber concert.

    One of these days someone is going to stuff her head & mount it over their fireplace.

    • Dear Heart says:

      “CAA headquarters, where I am.”

      I AM NOT RANDOM.

      I bet she doesn’t even visit her grandad again if he’s still alive. Unless he can help financially it’s not like she gives a fuck. I bet she’d smother Nutty Granny Moneybags with a pillow herself if it meant she could get some Fuck You money.

      And just for old time’s sake…DONKEY!

    • CUNTbunnies! says:

      [img]http://i56.tinypic.com/nznh9l.jpg[/img]

    • CaptainGary says:

      Screamed as opposed to rolled her fucking eyes and went back in the bar to wait for traffic to die down, like any real Angeleno would. What a hick. And I speak as a transplanted hick-to-Angeleno.

  18. Cee Lo says:

    From my secret concert. While I was performing, I took some pictures of a beautiful woman in the crowd.

    [IMG]http://i55.tinypic.com/34hv0y9.png[/IMG]
    [IMG]http://i53.tinypic.com/2a9rvi8.png[/IMG]
    [IMG]http://i52.tinypic.com/2hhoqwg.png[/IMG]
    [IMG]http://i54.tinypic.com/28o6k1.png[/IMG]
    [IMG]http://i52.tinypic.com/2q3bxhj.png[/IMG]
    [IMG]http://i52.tinypic.com/24109oz.png[/IMG]
    [IMG]http://i55.tinypic.com/296hjqq.png[/IMG]

  19. Cee Lo says:

    Cee Lo gets the ladies.

    [img]http://i55.tinypic.com/296hjqq.jpg[/img]

  20. How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

    PRESENTED W/OUT COMMENT (words escape me; this is just …)
    [img][IMG]http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae213/wackjobwonkeye/ceelodonk_2.jpg[/IMG][/img]

    • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

      try this again

      [img]http://i973.photobucket.com/albums/ae213/wackjobwonkeye/ceelodonk_2.jpg[/img]

      • Burra Fea says:

        She looks like she’s about to pull her pelts out. Freak.

      • Mini Driver, Intergalactic Bully says:

        Everything she does looks like acting to me. Here she’s doing Beatlemania Face.

      • CaptainGary says:

        What. The. Fuck? What year is this? It’s motherfucking Cee-Lo, not John Lennon.

      • These concert photos are KILLING me tonite. OMG lolololol!!! says:

        Is she covering her ears because she can’t stand the music? Because there’s no way she’s actually having a good time, considering she’s only there to show off her access to such an OMG exclusive event.

  21. Dr. Gary says:

    [img]http://i55.tinypic.com/34sgsx2.png[/img]

    • Dr. Gary says:

      [img]http://i51.tinypic.com/xc16qt.png[/img]

      • Dr. Gary says:

        [img]http://i54.tinypic.com/20sgd3b.png[/img]

        • These concert photos are KILLING me tonite. OMG lolololol!!! says:

          Why is she looking in a different direction than everybody else? There’s gotta be something reflective that she’s using to admire herself and pose for her totally candid self-portraits.

          • Dr. Gary says:

            I was wondering the same thing. It’s weird.

            She really is the ultimate narcissist. An amazing singer is performing live, literally right in front of her face, but she is obsessed only with herself and documenting *what an amazing time she had!*

        • Jacy says:

          Oh. Dear.

        • Dog-Yapping & Donkey Tears (Pelt-a-Polozza) says:

          OMG!!!!! SO FUG!!!!! What is going on with her face?????

          • Dog-Yapping & Donkey Tears (Pelt-a-Polozza) says:

            She is like someone’s 55 year old Mom who is overseeing prom who just has to steal the spotlight and dance with the kids..

            Dying…

        • JFA says:

          I’m sorry but if that’s not proof she got some collagen or whatever in her trout mouth I don’t know what is. She looks hideous.

      • New Year New You says:

        Is that Security? Because he looks real worried about Donks getting too close.

    • New Year New You says:

      Yeah, so I’m looking at this picture and now I’m remembering why I don’t go out anymore.

      Where are these photos coming from?

    • These concert photos are KILLING me tonite. OMG lolololol!!! says:

      At first I thought that guy was leaning in and taking her picture. She’s TAKING PHOTOS OF HERSELF “enjoying” a concert. She has ZERO friends. And she is fucking fug.

      • These concert photos are KILLING me tonite. OMG lolololol!!! says:

        Is she wearing a ring on the sacred sausage? Maybe she’s pretending to be engaged. 🙁

      • Jacy says:

        OMG, you’re right. She is filming herself and/or taking a photo of herself in that picture. Caught in the act. Cuckoo …. cuckoo …. cuckoo ….

    • MY Place says:

      She seriously looks 20 years older than everyone else there yet is making a spectacle of herself at the stage.

  22. Dr. Gary says:

    SHE? IS INSANE.

    http://vimeo.com/26097327

    Video posted of Cee Lo performing, but every few seconds she turns the camera back to herself singing the song. BISH PLZ. No one, and I mean NO ONE wants to watch you singing along to Cee Lo.

    Damnnnnnnnnn.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      Oh, big shocker. She does it in this one, too:

      http://vimeo.com/26097213

    • These concert photos are KILLING me tonite. OMG lolololol!!! says:

      Maybe that security dude (if that’s what he is) was pissed that some dumbass Donkey was recording a performance with the intent of distributing it without permission. Isn’t that usually frowned upon?

      • Mini Driver, Intergalactic Bully says:

        Venues have given the hell up when it comes to preventing people from filming shows. The formerly exhilarating experience of watching a performance has been replaced by craning your neck to see through a forest of arms bearing glowing phones. Everyone has their eyes fixed on their individual four-inch screen.

        Of the dozens of people visible in the picture above, how many are truly engaged with what is happening onstage? Maybe three?

        /sad_old_90s_curmudgeon

    • monster says:

      so crazy! she’s so close! and too animated for being that close – like how awkward is it that she is losing her mind and has her iphone waving in his face? Also, I love how she called this a “rendition” – i thought that meant he changed up the tone of the song, but really, he just sang Fuck You. That’s all.

      Has anyone seen the It’s always sunny where Dee is waving her arms around like an inflatable man? That’s what I imagine Donkey does at the Fat Melman’s.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB5DyyWrs1c&feature=related

    • Waited on satin, got stuck with polyester (DWR) says:

      The add under the video is for Dementia videos. Google ad sense knows she’s wackadoodle

  23. someproblems says:

    So on her blergh she still pretends to be celiac, though admits outright to not following the diet. Does not compute. Why does she lie like this? If one is celiac and doesn’t follow the diet, aren’t pants shit or something equally bad/painful? (I have a friend with crohn’s, so i am not just being a rotten bitch here.) She has basically lied about having a condition that she lacks the discipline to pull off. It’s rather amusing.

    Also? Adult onset acne? Go to your doctor and get a topical prescription. And stop troweling on the makeup for no apparent reason.

    • KashMoney says:

      You are 100% correct. When she flounced in here last time on chat, I asked to confirm that she was actually diagnosed with celiac. She said yes and even mentioned the internist’s name. I think some commenters pointed out that there are degrees of celiac so it’s possible she does have it. I say, hell no. Even mild cases fuck you up hard.

      But bitch is too stupid and too lazy to do her homework, so she does things like drink beer even though it is grain-based. Since it’s a liquid, she didn’t know to maintain the lie.

      It’s basically like being diabetic, you have no choices except to watch your diet.

      • someproblems says:

        Except you can control diabetes with insulin (i have a diabetic friend too). With celiac, there is nothing but the diet to prevent nastiness. And in terms of degrees, i am not sure about that. The one consensus i do remember is as you said, if you eat gluten, your fucked. Also, i am told the pain from attacks is enough to help one keep to the path of keeping to diet. As in the consequences from one mouthful of cake are so much more painful and negative that it really makes the cake not worth it at all.

        She is a useless liar who lacks the brains/discipline to stick to her lies. I just kant with this bitch.

      • How Brayella Got Her Hoove Back says:

        You can buy G-F beer. Bud makes Red Bridge, which is ‘okay’ in a pinch (tastes like O’Doul’s Amber).

        I hadn’t heard that Donkey has been back to chat! She really has no one else other than her detractors, does she? If / when she clomps in again, pin her down – which doc endorses celiacs using BPC, or is she blatantly non-compliant to medical instrx?

    • JFA says:

      My sister in law has it and literally eats nothing with wheat/flour whatever. Not one thing. Or she gets violently ill from what I understand.

  24. Dog-Yapping & Donkey Tears (Pelt-a-Polozza) says:

    OT but she and Greasy made up, they are back to being friends. Poor stupid Greasy.

Comments are closed.