My, has Julia had a busy day! Julia Allison, fresh off commenting on the beautifully emaciated Duchess of Cambridge, spent the entire day subtly bragging all over her kingdom of fructose and tears. First, she coyly mentioned her having the need to join the Screen Actors Guild by publicly posing a question that could easily have been answered privately by her agent or her failed actor friend — looking forward to Final Destination 5, Miles! Then she spent some time bragging that she signed up for what essentially amounts to a continuing education course. Then, I assume, she clomped her way over here — presumably to see what we called her knees today, and, well, just for shits and giggles, I’m going to call them “husky” — and saw that we not so astutely pointed out that, by essentially remarking on the somewhat unnerving litheness of some chick who bagged a balding rich dude, she essentially called our much more accomplished and awesome First Lady a slovenly fat ass to whom no one should aspire.
The oversight and inadvertent insult can be forgiven. Michelle Obama is BLACK after all, in case you haven’t noticed, and Julia Allison is completely unaware that black people exist unless they have a congressional seat or are serving her corn. And while we can forgive her, Julia Allison can barely forgive herself for allowing her insane food and body image issues make her a little bit racist, so she posted this odd entry which stuck out on her blog like her weiner when it’s hard.
“Striking”? I’d be more inclined to describe this photograph as “staged.” I’m more amused that she described Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip and President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama as power couples. Sure the president and his wife are powerful people, but this isn’t Us Magazine, it’s the president of the UNITEDFUCKINGSTATES. What amazes me even more is that, while Julia Allison is twiddling her tweeter over Kate Middleton, she really can’t muster no more than a mundane compliment about Michelle Obama, who looks beautiful here, as always. Why? Because Michelle Obama has a realistic body and doesn’t fit into Julia Allison’s fairy tale princess fantasy on the account of having her own career and accomplishments.