Reblogging NonSociety Wants Julia To Be On A Reality Show

Thanks, tipster, for sending this perfect opportunity our way!

My name is Michael Raptis and I am the Casting Director for What Not to Wear on TLC. Casting is currently underway in DC for Season 8. We would love to feature a Female Journalist who stands out from the crowd and not in a good way! The idea of the show is to help a woman who is being held back by her style. Maybe she lost a lot of weight and no longer knows how to dress, maybe she is dressing too sexy and attracting the wrong men, maybe the way she dresses is keeping her from getting a promotion at work…We would love to help! I was hoping you might know the perfect person. I attached a casting notice to this email with all the info on the show and a link to the website. ****REMEMBER THIS NOMINATION MUST REMAIN A SECRET**** I would love to talk with you more about this opportunity when you get a moment. Hope to hear from you soon.

Best,

Michael Raptis
Casting Director
TLC’s “What Not to Wear”

NOMINATE! Donks needs some serious help.

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102 Responses to Reblogging NonSociety Wants Julia To Be On A Reality Show

  1. Bepelted Braying Barnyard Animal with NPD says:

    FIRST!!!

    I’m going to nominate her by sending this link: http://trainwrecks.tumblr.com/post/141126974/charlsie-i-worked-for-julia-allison-pictured

  2. DirtyLakeMichigan says:

    I think the Easter outfit would make an awesome statement. Oh, and the ballet outfit. And the romper-wiener one. So many.

  3. Julia Allison the Cockroach says:

    No thanks, she gets enough free shit.

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      I’ll pass–I’m not enabling Donks’ TV appearances or her career. She’s a vile person, and I don’t wish to watch her Bray on my television set.

      • Princess WideStance says:

        Thank you! It’s not like she’d listen anyway.

        I kind of like how she dresses now – the cray is on full display and it’s funny to watch. Cuz I’m a mean catlady!

    • I’m kidding. You have to personally know the person you nominate.

    • Seriously, no way does she deserve a free wardrobe makeover.

      That’s one thing that frustrates me about this show…half of the people don’t want to change! Give the free shit to someone who desperately wants it!

      • zandra says:

        well the way she flaunts her money to begin with is fucking disgusting.

        “i got a small 10k graduation gift”
        “i spend all year traveling!”
        “i still have a decent amount of savings from 2009”
        “i’m looking at 4k a month apartments”

        “i’m selling these giftcards.. i a teh pooorz’

  4. RollsRoyceRevenge says:

    Are those the people who are going to “help” her?

    Because if so, something something two wrongs something something showervom.

  5. NuttyGrannyMoneybags says:

    But who will her “friends” who made the OMG SECRET call? Will it be Jacy with a Happy Face superimposed over her face or will JP opt to have a Noteworty Gay Man, such as Teej, be his stand-in?

  6. The Freeloading Musketeers says:

    She needs help, but she doesn’t deserve it. Plus the women they have on the show are usually likable. She’d never make it far enough in the process to get on.

  7. Weekend at Lily's says:

    I know all the people at her JOB are always telling me she’d get promoted if she just dressed better. Um, err, oops! She doesn’t have a job. HA!

    Well, then maybe she’d attract more mature men with a pair of trousers. Oh wait, she meets decent guys who run after the first date when they realize she’s certifiable and revoltingly self absorbed.

    And, um, I don’t think she has lost much weight.

    Save the shopping spree for a good person who needs help, not an egomaniac who has been given dozens of chances.

    • Stalker is the new Empurpled Pity Polyp ♪ ♫ says:

      agreed!!

      and any of y’all can feel free to nominate me. I need new clothes.

      • Helena (Call Me Beauty) says:

        Stalker, what’s your clothing style? Just wondering. We probably can’t send you clothes, but we could have fun mentally designing outfits for you.

      • Stalker is the new Empurpled Pity Polyp ♪ ♫ says:

        Well, Beauty, since you asked & I like to talk about myself, I work in an office where I never see anyone all day except on a trip to the loo. EXCEPT on days when MAJOR clients come through and might stop by my desk to see a codemonkey at work. I always forget which days those are despite many many email reminders. I don’t take lunch so I can leave early so I spend 8 hours a day sitting at a desk, not talking to anyone and going slightly crazy beneath the cold florescent glow.

        My basic requirement for clothing is: Stretchy. I am seriously thinking about buying a pair of straight leg black workout pants and wearing them to the office. I think I could pull it off if I wore a long shirt over them. I have to think long and hard though because the pants I want are 30$ and I have a hard time spending more than 20$ on something. Oh my other requirement is machine washable and no ironing.

        When I’m not in the office I swap the cargo pants for yoga pants even if I’m doing nothing but emptying the freezer of leftover ice cream while catching up on “The Avengers (in color!)” (1967).

  8. None Society says:

    if julia landed this, she’d be all “i have my own show on TLC!”

  9. fuck camping! says:

    OT, but this conversation posted by mike arrington is reminiscent of julia’s convo with her ex james. ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjmPHtlirfY )

    “Me: Hey!
    Person who was talking: oh, oh no.
    Me: Hi. I heard you guys were here and I wanted to stop by and say hi.
    Them: dead silence.
    Me: so….
    Them: Deafening silence.
    Me: This is usually where you guys say “sit down, have a drink.”
    Them: not one sound
    Me: This is awkward. I guess I’ll be leaving now.”
    http://techcrunch.com/2010/09/21/so-a-blogger-walks-into-a-bar/

  10. Donkopedia says:

    Hey, have you read http://ramshackleglam.com/blog/ today. I excerpt.
    …..When I start ordering women worldwide to tie pink ribbons in their braids and wear tulle skirts around town so that the menfolk will run after them with clubs at the ready, we’ll talk…..

    This has to be veiled reference, yes?

    • Princess WideStance says:

      It most certainly must be. Love it.

    • married, still says:

      Also, there’s a vegetarian lasagna recipe there with eggs and two kinds of cheese

      Eggs and cheese are vegetarian?

      Vegetarian fail.

      • jpa says:

        Yes, they are. You’re thinking of Veganism. Vegans don’t eat any animal products, where typically vegetarians don’t eat meat.

      • married, still says:

        vegetarians in my experience don’t eat animal products but might still wear leather; vegans eschew all animal products, including leather

        2 kinds of cheese plus milk is hardly vegetarian — it’s non-red-meat eating.

      • My nostrils are TOTALLY symmetrical! says:

        Incorrect, Married:

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegetarianism#Varieties_of_vegetarianism

        If what you’re saying is true I’ve been no where near being a vegetarian for the last…….7 years.

      • totaljing says:

        veggies eat cheese and all other forms of dairy. VEGANS do not.

      • married, still says:

        sounds like pesca chicken broth a tarian to me

        i don’t eat red meat is not nearly as glamorous a statement as i am a vegetarian

      • My nostrils are TOTALLY symmetrical! says:

        Are you still saying that you wouldn’t be a vegetarian if you eat eggs/cheese/dairy?

        I don’t eat red meat, fish, pork, chicken, rabbit, or anything of that sort. I avoid (at all costs) products made with chicken/beef broth, chicken/beef fat, etc.

        For all intents and purposes, I’m a vegetarian. I’m confused where the break down is happening here?

      • mcakez says:

        With you, MNATS. Not to mention that most vegetarians I know avoid leather and any other dead animal product.

        I will admit that the definition of ‘vegetarian’ is a lot more accepting than it used to be. What we call vegan used to be what was termed ‘vegetarian,’ and there would be ‘lacto-ovo vegetarians’ — those who do not consume meat or flesh products, but do consume ‘non-fatal’ products like eggs or dairy. Additionally, one could be ‘lacto-veg’ or ‘ovo-veg’ or some configuration thereof. Vegan meant ‘did not consume AND product of byproduct of living beings’ (and I use ‘consume’ here to apply to not only that which is ate, but that which is purchased.) The biggest example of what would formerly set a ‘vegetarian’ apart from a ‘vegan’ would be something like honey.

        However, over time it has become easier to just label ‘vegan’ vs. ‘vegetarian.’ The whole notion of purchasing leather as acceptable in either culture is completely unheard of in my experience.

        Other than Julia ‘for all intents and purposes vegetarian’ Allison, who we all know is fucking liar anyway.

      • mcakez says:

        I forgot to mention that one area where vegans tend to be more strict than vegetarians is with regards to ‘animal tested’ products. Strict vegans (per the original term) tended to be much more careful about avoiding anything product or company that was involved in animal testing.

        In any case, regardless of the origins of the term, terminology today tends to align with vegetarian being some configuration of lacto-ovo consumption, abstaining from leather/fur/gelatin/sentient animal byproducts (I won’t bring carmine into the discussion, as that tends to be a little to esoteric for most conscientious objectors, and always winds up with the pro-meat community rallying around the ‘how many bugs die from pesticide’ argument.)

    • Helena (Call Me Beauty) says:

      Isn’t her “#1 Without-A-Doubt Fashion Week Pick” (that gown by Marchesa) really, really nice? And as I’ve mentioned before, I normally hate the one-shoulder one-sleeve thing.

  11. Delurked says:

    Being on the show wouldn’t make a difference. Remember when she made that video of her shopping for jeans and was all “I’m not comfortable wearing these but I’ll give it a shot!” And then tried selling the gift card for the jeans months later? Wasn’t it Armani Exchange or something?

    You can lead a donkey to water…

  12. ShesJustStupid says:

    Where is she anyway? nothing all day.

    • Learned Paw says:

      Evidently getting into a fight with her “people”:

      My manager & I just got into an argument about whether Rachel Zoe’s show makes her look “like an asshole” (my words). I say yes. He says no.

      • ScissorsToThePelts says:

        SHE is the asshole

      • totaljing says:

        I think her show does wonders for her reputation, actually. I’m not a fan but she’s definitely not as horrifying as one would have thought. That show is universally lauded for improving zoe’s rep. she has no fucking clue what she’s talking about.

      • She's Just Stupid says:

        But I thought she didn’t HAVE representation. According to the Dr. of Donk’s thesis.

      • Dr. Gary says:

        Actually, I think the show humanizes Rachel Zoe and makes her much more likeable.

        Dumb Julie. When will you learn to stop burning bridges? Especially BEFORE they’ve been built.

      • NorseHorse says:

        Sounds like jealousy. Was never a fan of Zoe, but the show is very watchable if you like fashion, and she has some crazy access, making Julia seethe. Zoe might not be the deepest person, but she’s clearly passionate about what she does, 100 percent. No bullshit fake “spirituality” stuff, she worked to build something, a real business from her passion for clothes and designers and stars and all that stuff that seems shallow. But she is really good at it, and you have to give her that.

      • zandra says:

        you all keep forgetting that julia knows zoe personally. she has access to people in high places.. unlike us plebs!

      • Delurked says:

        i hated zoe until i watched the show and now i kind of love her. um err oops?

        clearly she is unclear as to the definition of asshole, otherwise she would realize she is one, of the Grade A variety.

      • jpa says:

        Seriously WTF is wrong with her? One of the most talked about things besides all the “zoeisms” is how great, funny. fun ect., she is.

    • bitchface says:

      Jesus Christ, she WORKED all last week. She needs a month (or two or three) vacation….

    • Probably causing a racial incident on the Bolt Bus.

  13. My nostrils are TOTALLY symmetrical! says:

    Y’all Rory Gilmore has caught the Julia Allison carrot head disease (not to be confused with celery sticks disease)
    http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l964qqWL4Z1qzxgjjo1_400.jpg

    • zandra says:

      but here’s the thing.. HERE’S THE THING!!! rory gillmore doesn’t have a case of donkeyitis so can pull it off.

      • get megan out of my hood says:

        And she didn’t dye her eyebrows either. i just realized that the guy who did her color is now on the real housewives of dc. i wonder if she specifically wen to the ted gibson salon on the off chance she should be on.

      • zandra says:

        ways donkey failed at being a redhead:

        1. dyeing her eyebrows.
        2. getting the wrong colour for her skin tone.
        3. trying to dress the ‘part’ of a redhead.
        4. receiving the services of a hairdresser for free.
        5. RED PELTS.

      • jpa says:

        Ted Gibson is also on What Not To Wear.

  14. Can-Swiss says:

    Remember her Business Lady outfit? Her black bell-bottom slacks? lol.

    • Grawr says:

      A good reminder of what NOT to wear at career fair tomorrow.

      Speaking of which, what do you guys think? Full suit with dress shirt? Suit with nice (not dress shirt) top? Just slacks/pencil skirt with a dress shirt??

      You know what I don’t get actually? Didn’t JA work as a legislative correspondant on the hill for a bit after she dropped out of college the first time around? The dress code there is usually business formal Mon-Thurs and business casual Fri. Most people, including the lowly staff assistants there dress pretty damn well. You’d think she would’ve learned how to look professional.

      • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

        ‘business formal Mon-Thurs and business casual Fri.’

        Haha. First off, you’re assuming she clocked the same hours as the professionals …

        RE: Career Fair ~ go w/ full suit with dress shirt. Good luck!

  15. Nickelodeon Chic says:

    Um, she just bashed Rachel Zoe on Twitter. Jules, do NOT mess with the Zoe. Bzh plz.

  16. juliaspublicist says:

    So what happened to Boston?

    • She's Just Stupid says:

      She’s in Boston. She’s going to that conference after all?

      • fuck camping! says:

        EmTech is 2/3 over already. way to be un-fashionably late to an event you were comped to attend, donkey.

        on another note, my cat-friend who was there already had to leave, so he won’t get that fan-pic with donkey i was hoping for. sad-balloonz.com.

  17. She's Just Stupid says:

    Huh…her Twitter is acting weird. I no longer see the Rachel Zoe quotes or her Boston arrival.

  18. Dr. Gary says:

    Jon Hamm comparing reality tv ‘stars’ to porn stars:

    “L.A. represents opportunity. And has been proven over and over in the current media landscape, it doesn’t take much for them to put you on TV. If that’s all you want you can just be on ‘The Bachelor’ or ‘The Real Housewives’ or whatever show just wants oversized personalities, ridiculous behavior and zero dignity…

    if you just want to be famous … that’s not that much different than porn. ‘I’m a movie star!’ Well, no you’re not. You’re a porn star, and that’s completely different. And you know, hey mazel tov — porn probably built half the houses out here, but you’re selling your dignity in a way that I feel I’m not. And once you sell it, it’s gone. You ain’t getting it back.”

    http://www.details.com/celebrities-entertainment/cover-stars/201010/mad-men-actor-alpha-male-jon-hamm?currentPage=1

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      Our Julie was born for porn, what with the daddy issues, the well-documented sexual dysfunctions and inability to climax, those plaid Catholic schoolgirl skirts, and the off the rails exhibitionism. Wicked Pictures presents Ineffable Stanford Cougars.

    • flotsam says:

      At least porn stars have a skill set. She is a null set.

  19. stop trying to make amazeballs happen says:

    Oh no, she’s in Boston. I fear leaving the office and venturing home now.

    • Har-Har says:

      If you’re in one of the older neighborhoods, the cobblestone streets should help you hear the donkey clomping from a safe distance.

  20. diluted brain says:

    I love this show & always thought she’d be the perfect candidate. If any real life friend of hers (we know you’re here) would take the bullet… do it, for us 🙂

  21. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    Wow, she just called her manager “delusional” on twitter — way to go, Jules! Let your professionalism shine on!

    juliaallison: My manager & I just got into an argument about whether Rachel Zoe’s show makes her look “like an asshole” (my words). I say yes. He says no.

    TracieMayWagner: @juliaallison Ummm… Big asshole!

    juliaallison: @TracieMayWagner – right?!?? This is my argument against doing a reality show! I think he’s delusional! No one looks good!!

    This may be her craziest moment yet.

    • Scooby Don't says:

      So that’s how the spin is going to go now.

      Donkey never landed a reality show because she never wanted one. No one looks good on those shows, only like an asshole. Oh Bravo how soon we forget.

      It’s always so easy to say you’re not going to do something you’re never going to be offered the chance to do.

      Coming up: My ten reasons why I’m not going to become the Son of God

      • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

        WHAT is she spinning, do we know for sure?

        She’s probably been dropped by the mgr already…

      • Barking Madness impeccably dressed couch surfer says:

        Ding ding ding!

        The manager sees that at this point the only paid work she’s going to get is a reality show. She still thinks she can be a star journalist, even tho she has blown all of the great opportunities she’s been given.

        She’s been dropped, or will be soon. Who would keep a client who rejected a chance with Oprah?

    • Records Custodian says:

      Her “argument” against doing a reality show is that every single project and pilot she has been in has been soundly rejected.

      Also, she doesn’t need a reality show to make her look like an asshole. This is an area where she is indeed a founder of the brand.

  22. NorseHorse says:

    Random thought: I would hate to have the name “Raptis” if only for the unfortunate misspelling that might occur.

  23. bitchface says:

    Julia doesn’t watch TV, remember?

  24. Grawr says:

    Um, no.

    Plus, they’re looking for a “Female Journalist” and Jules is only half that.

  25. Bepelted Braying Barnyard Animal with NPD says:

    OT, but Christine O’Donnell reminds me of our Donkey. They both bray their lies constantly and have no careers to speak of, yet want to be loved, admired, and given some sort of position of importance.

    Fuck them both.

  26. nosrsly says:

    Oh my god. This guy – http://irreduciblefigure.blogspot.com/ – thinks he’s fawning over Julia but his story just exposes how pathetic and sad she is. Maybe the saddest JA story yet.

    • Wonkeye says:

      That was ten kinds of pathetic.

    • flotsam says:

      That is fascinating.

      Done!! One favor though: would you mind taking a few photos of me throughout the evening?

      Fortuitous, indeed, as fine art portrait photography remains one of my great passions; the equivalent, perhaps, of inviting Kobe Bryant to a party, one the condition that, once arrived, he can sink a few free throws.”

      Ahhhh, tools of a feather, boxed up together!

      “She was, without question, haltingly beautiful. I asked a few stock questions.”

      Ahhhh, illiterate tools! Even more fortuitous! And halting!

      “I now held my camera, Julia’s camera, four tickets, four party passes, and two official programs.

      Julia kindly introduced me to several well-dressed male and female acquaintances, who in turn, trained all of their attention back to her. I felt like celebrity arm-candy or a professional escort, but I remained chipper, obliging Julia’s every request. ”

      Ahhh, the koans: What do you call a whore’s whore? What do you call a tool’s tool? What do you call the reflected light of a star made of reflected light?

      “Julia’s presentation went smoothly enough, in comparison to the rest of the debacle. She stumbled briefly with one line, but by that time, the audience had thinned to loose rabble, feet propped on seatbacks, little cliques of conversations in the aisles. No one seemed to notice.”

      If a Donkey brays and only a Nobody is there to hear it, did it really make a sound?

      What is the sound of one’s sad fapping?

    • Slutty Catbanger says:

      Insane! I love it!

    • nosrsly says:

      The best is:
      “Next to our ticketed seats, sat three vacant spots. Like a drug-fueled wave of profound realization, my position in the evening’s proceedings became unflinchingly clear. Here at my arm, introducing me to haute couture-encased blondes and skinny-jeaned hipsters was a beautiful female comet of pure ambition, whose trajectory, orbit, and velocity did not rest long enough for the inclusion of friends, not at events like this.”

      Yeah, that’s the problem, Julia’s comet is just too high velocity for friends.

    • fuck camping! says:

      High Velocity Comet of Halting Beauty: new username alert!

  27. vomit in the baugher says:

    Fact: her “manager” steven was an agent at ICM before he was fired. Julia albertson only gets the best!

    • Bepelted Braying Barnyard Animal with NPD says:

      plus, aren’t all his other clients ‘tards like julia? mostly annoying blogger types who want to be OMGrealworldfamous??? amiright?

    • fuck camping! says:

      ah, but according to julie he ‘left’ to start his own firm, or something like that, partner up with some other peeps… dunno.

      • bitchface says:

        Yes but this the same Julie who turned down Oprah, works for TONY, is a writer at The Guardian, etc etc etc.

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