A Trip Down Memory Lane: I AM NOT RANDOM! I HAVE A TALK SHOW ON NBC!!!

Last night on Twitter, in addition to lying about helping people with AIDS and bitching about the cost of health insurance, Julia retweeted this year-old interview from Mark Zito’s College Radio show on Sirius. That interview was amazeballs, and if you have an hour, I highly recommend you listen to it and relive the insanity.

From The Mark Zito Show Vault: This appearance featuring @juliaallison was exactly one year ago. Good times? 🙂 http://tinyurl.com/3479j6z

Hey @markzito – You know the irony? That 1st date I raved about from last year? WORST 2nd DATE IN THE HISTORY OF MY LIFE.

@juliaallison All the more reason you should finally go on that date with me. I normally peak around date 13, methinks.

Relive Julia being heinously crass and slutty, the Jewish writer, her summer fuck buddy — who was involved with someone else at the time, it turns out — and her insistence that TMI Weekly was an NBC talk show. Also listen to her get bitched out by the girlfriend of a radio host that Julia was unfairly criticizing, who happened to be Mark Zito’s boss.

My, how far Julia has fallen from the even then relative obscurity.

This also reminds me that I have been contributing to this blog for over a year. Here’s my first post. My, how far I’ve fallen down the donkey hole since then.  *Shoots self in head.

Coincidentally, it has also been over a year since my favorite post ever. It displayed the sheer magic that you wonderful commenters display every day. I love all you guys, even you RollsRoyceRevenge!

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44 Responses to A Trip Down Memory Lane: I AM NOT RANDOM! I HAVE A TALK SHOW ON NBC!!!

  1. Princess WideStance says:

    I’ve never heard that recording, so thank you for the highlights, JP! What an idiot this woman is.

    Did she think something good would come out of pretending to work directly for NBC?

  2. PinkDenofIniquity says:

    Wasn’t the gf who TOOK HER TO CLASS on air Layla Kayleigh of SYTYCD, and whom Julia is currently posting quotes from on her blog and talking about her “speaking truth to power?”

    I hate that I know this.

  3. Julia's Social Halitosis says:

    Look how cute the girl next to her is. She also looks less than thrilled to be that close to donkey. Probably worried the fake tan will rub off on her white shirt.

    • My absolute favorite parts of that interview was when Julia continually spoke for “all women” and would turn to that girl and ask for validation, and she was like, “Yeah, whatever.”

  4. partypants says:

    God I hate her voice.

    She sounds like a crude skank. “You’d finger yourself”??? Christ. She is one trucker bomb away from sounding like a meth prostitute with that mouth.

    Teehee only takes me one glass of sangria! God how long has she been pulling that one out?

    Telling everyone and their dog about every man you date or fuck, yep, worked for you and redacted, keep it up dumbass!

    The only thing that has changed in the last 3 years is she is now even less of a nobody than she was before.

    GO AWAY JULIA.

    • idiotbox says:

      it’s her “pretty schoolgirl talking like a horny dude” schtick she’s been kicking since HIGH SCHOOL.

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      If asked what adjective best describes Julie Albertson, I would reply “vulgar,” which put me in hyena giggles when the oversharer got all miffed at seeing brief nudity at the close of Hair’s first act. I loved that ridonkulous outrage at something staged in a very natural, non-threatening way. Hardly the same can be said of this trollop’s calculated moves at “outrageousness.” “Oh, I’m having a booty call. Tee hee. I’m at the porn awards at CES! Lemme tell you about blowjobs, my vibrator, and the many ways I’m a limp fuck in the sack!” She’s her own worst advertisement.

  5. rumplepeltskin says:

    excellent post, JP. i wasn’t an RBNS’er until more recently and i’d never seen those posts from a yr ago. i was LOLing while reading the whole rich/covino/julia/mark zito clusterfuck

    thanks for pointing out some of the Golden Oldies for us newer RBNS’ers

    much love

  6. FaFail Waldorf says:

    The more photos I see of that red hair, the harder it becomes to understand why she didn’t IMMEDIATELY insist it be dyed back brunette. It’s AWFUL. And that’s not in my humble opinion, that’s fact.

    Also a crap second date following a great first one isn’t irony, Julia. It’s just a bummer.

  7. bunnaaayyyzz, i’m unfortunately back at my office after attending an amazeballoons wedding. can’t wait for the cray this coming weekend at the nuptials of “that poor little guy”.
    that is all. air kisses!

    • idiotbox says:

      i predict 10 bazillion pictures of her dancing with her “baby brother” while Allie is standing somewhere to the side.
      I also predict a picture of her licking the cake BEFORE they get to cut the first slice and I also predict she’ll dance during the “mother-son” “father-daughter” dance with dadsers.

      • idiotbox says:

        someone with creativity and talent should make “baugher bingo: the little brother wedding edition” board, btw.

        also, i’ll be working, but all of you should drink a shot every time she says she teared up/literally cried.

  8. bf says:

    I’m really more of an artist. Who hates putting on make-up.

  9. rumplepeltskin says:

    HOW COME THAT HATER RRR GETS A SHOUT OUT? I WANT A SHOUT OUT!!!

    • RollsRoyceRevenge says:

      Oh Rumple,

      If only you knew the full story of JP and I. Ours has been a stormy relationship, with thunder, lighting, rain and gusts of wind expected in some locations up to 20 miles an hour. The passion has burned as red and as hot as the rash around Arthur Kade’s nipsy; then it has cooled to the throbbing tender meekness of a carefree meadow lark tweeting a fart.

      So imagine, verily, my anguish when I returned from my pedicurist, hairdresser, jeweler, dentist, cosmetic surgeon, VD clinic and morgue to find him packing his things (by which I mean he was putting clothing in suitcases, as opposed to jamming his genitals a little further into his Y-fronts).

      “Darling,” I said ineffably, whilst tearing up, “Do you love another?”
      “Yes,” he admitted.
      “Who?” I quoth.
      “Myself, mostly, but someone beyond that,” he replied.
      “Tell me!” I shrieked. “Tell me the name of this foul interloper so that I may rend her hair from her head!”
      “You’d come away with two fistfuls of plastic yuck if you tried,” he said.
      “But what of me?” I sobbed ejaculatorily, stealing a glance in the mirror (eye shadow a mess, but lipstick still perfect).
      “Your smug,” he said.
      “Don’t you mean ‘you’re smug’?” I sniffled.
      “Yes,” he admitted. “I was going to edit in an apostrophe later. And now, Harlot, I frankly don’t give a damn.”
      “Don’t you mean Scarlett?” I hiccupped cacophonously.
      “No, this time it wasn’t a typo,” he said. “I must away.”

      Words cannot describe the heartbreaking sound of his light step across the stoop of our home, the final silent sigh as he contemplated existence without me, the series of crashes and bangs as he missed the first step and went ass over teakettle down four flights to the curb.

      Feel for me, Rumple. For I…I have been turned away forever from his side.

      Hey–are you going to eat that cupcake, or what?

  10. It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

    I started listening to that Mark Zito show last night, but I could only handle a minute or two at a time ~ just finished it, something like 18 hrs later ~ gahh, what a cunt Julia Allison is.

  11. bingaaaay says:

    My doctor just called: I have Sjögren’s syndrome.

  12. idiotbox says:

    i’d like to say that i absolutely despise when dudes talk to me when we bone: it brings me back to reality and ruins the mood.

    I will not speak for all women, but I’ll kick you in the nuts if you think complimenting me when I have my ankles on your shoulders is a good idea.

    • juliaspublicist says:

      Not me. I love nasty verbal sex.

    • Dr. Gary says:

      I’m with you, idiotbox. No dirty talk whilst making the sexy times. Maybe it’s my Catholic upbringing? But dirty talk just takes me out of the moment and ruins it.

      And it always sounds so cheesy. Like a bad ’70s porn: ‘oh yeah, you like that don’t you?’ or ‘you love my big cock?’ Nope. No thanks. I’m not on a job interview, damn it. Stop asking me questions!

      HOWEVAH…get me alone in a dark room? I’ll do whatever you want. Pull my hair, spank my ass, tie me up? Bring IT. Just don’t talk about it.

  13. ShesJustStupid says:

    Oh great…she’s not moving until August 10???? I was hoping for the 1st.

  14. bingaaaay says:

    Hey guys. Just wanted to let you know the doctor called. It’s Dysentery.

  15. diluted brain says:

    congrats on the year of fabulousity, JP!

  16. zandra says:

    ..isn’t 13 her magical number of dates she makes someone wait before she lets them in to her musty clam dungeon?

  17. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    There are 50 kinds of cray in this interview, but did she really blowtorch her career over a personal grudge — because two popular radio hosts didn’t pay enough attention to her at some meet-and-greet affair? Yes, she did.

    “You’re some silly blogger nothing.”

    “How the fuck did you think this is a good idea?”

    It’s gonna be love at first sight in L.A.

  18. Arl says:

    I can’t believe I’m listening to this. She is so full of shit.

  19. Sausage Snappers says:

    She is so goddamn transparent in her attention whore ways.

  20. Peltasse says:

    ugh, i thought i remembered how heinous this was, but listening to it again is even worse than i remember. oh god lord. what a stupid, attention-seeking idiot. severe canklehausen happening here.

  21. Julia's Fat Ass says:

    “This doesn’t happen that often in NY.” Yes, you right, no one makes out on the street, you asshole. You are so unique.

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