Julia: So Nice

If there’s one thing that pisses me off, it’s when Donkey tries to advance her bullshit fantasy that she is a NICE person and we are simply angry, sort of sad adults who despise her for no good reason despite all the lies,  the brazen greed and the nasty games she plays with exes and their new partners.

Tool always forgets that her re-re cray-cray has been forwarded around for years via e-mail, text, Facebook message. Hey, Zuckerberg ass-kisser and Internet privacy expert: If you want your lunacy to remain private, don’t put it in e-mail!

Here’s her recent reply to an ex who ordered her to stop bothering him. I have received it several times from friends of the couple; I have redacted the names of the people involved. Kindly, she sent it to his girlfriend and asked her to pass it along. Because she is such a nice person!

Julia Allison at 8:10pm
(no subject)
Hello [REDACTED],

Since [REDACTED]’s email doesn’t seem to be working, won’t you please forward this along to him?
This will be the last time I contact you – or him.
Good luck in the future.
Thank you.
————–
Hello [REDACTED],

Wow … the first time I’ve heard from you in 2.5 years and this is how you choose to address me? You sound disproportionately angry.
[REDACTED], I haven’t called or texted you in two years. I don’t even have your phone number! And I haven’t emailed you in over a YEAR! I facebooked messaged you in December – once, to ask you to give me closure, and once to wish you luck in your engagement. I haven’t physically seen you since June of 2007. Even by the most liberal definition of stalking, you would have a difficult time proving that case. 🙂
I also replied to your fiancee’s facebook message by telling her that I would take down any mention of you if she wanted – but she never replied.
I think I’ve been pretty reasonable. I’ve always said nice things about you and I’ve always told the truth – we loved each other, we were very serious, and I made a lot of mistakes. I don’t think anything about my behavior is horrible. These are my memories, too. Perhaps you’re embarrassed because you overlapped [REDACTED] and me? Because we were still sleeping together and you were still telling me you loved me up well through the summer of 2007, when you were dating her? I assumed that she knew that, but perhaps she didn’t.
I’m sorry you’re upset, but you could have dealt with this in a much more reasonable manner.
I’m actually exceptionally grateful that you finally responded – at least I can move on now!! I wish we could have been friends, but I have my answer. Thank you for that.
Good luck in your future marriage to [REDACTED]!
Take care of yourself,
Julia
PS. So does this mean I’m not invited to the wedding? 😉

And a little addendum about her equally demented enablers who still remain her friends — something the blondes could not bring themselves to do, largely because of this bullshit. She wrote a long message to this same ex, and forwarded it around to her friends asking them why they thought he hadn’t replied. And instead of someone saying: Because he’s obviously not into speaking to you, so LEAVE THE FUCKING GUY ALONE, their replies were along these lines: Don’t worry, Julia. He hasn’t replied YET. Give it time!

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279 Responses to Julia: So Nice

  1. Scooby Don't says:

    That PS is the bitch cherry on top of the cunty sundae.

    • if i were the recipient of this email, that PS is the part where i would grab a knife and just started stabbing.

      • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        Better for the recipients to remind themselves that they’ve achieved the kind of bliss that comes with finding true love and a partner with whom you’ll go through life, while she’s going to continue along the path of lonely, pathetic, and desperate.

        They’re getting married, and she’s freaking out more and more over the fact that she’s going to be the very single older sister at her little brother’s wedding this summer.

        She couldn’t even hold on to a tacky, suburban shlub like Justin, a guy she would have looked down her (re-re-redone) nose at a couple of a years ago.

      • “Re-re-redone” — very nice; would make an excellent screen name.

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      You know, each time my hard heart melts a little and I start to feel that maybe I’m being too harsh on her — what with her obvious mental illness(es), lack of good friends to tell her truth, and parents who are as demented as she is, she never had a chance at sanity — she pulls me back to reality.

      What. A. Cunt.

  2. juliajane says:

    1. Julie Bogger is a bitch

    2. Those similies are so smug

    3. She’s so fucking obtuse!!!!!

  3. Eyebrows of Fury says:

    Wow, Jacy! Bringing out the big guns for Thursday! It’s like RBNS Christmas!

  4. Julia's Fat Ass says:

    She’s insane.

  5. My nostrils are TOTALLY symmetrical! says:

    Just………yiiiikes. I am so glad I learned early to never play the crazy exgirlfriend. If I learned anything in life, thank god it was that.

    • My nostrils are TOTALLY symmetrical! says:

      Also, regardless of what I think of the book, it’s unfortunate that “He’s just not that into you” was written for women who need the obvious pointed out to them (Julia) and those people are the ones who aren’t taking it to heart. There’s a whole chapter on CLASSY NOT CRAZY. She she go read that again.

    • Arl says:

      I’ll admit that I’ve had crazy ex-girlfriend urges, but managed not to give into them because I knew how insane that would make me. Although those were all shortly after the break up, two years later is a time when you shouldn’t even bother thinking of him anymore, let alone send creepy emails.

      • PinkDenofIniquity says:

        Giirrrrllll YES. It’s one thing to have crazy ex gf urges, what makes you crazy is ACTING ON THEM.

  6. SA says:

    psychotic. what kind of person actively seeks to destroy someone else’s relationship? i’m horrified.

    • Jacy says:

      And to do it right after their engagement. She is vile.

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      She’s desperate, lonely, and past her expiration date. Therefore, nobody else is allowed to be happy.

    • New Year New You says:

      There are a lot of sad, desperate, nasty women out there who are happy to destroy relationships and marriages, she’s far from alone in this regard.

  7. ShesJustStupid says:

    Wish we could see his email. I guess we also know what miracle she was praying for over Christmas. “Please respond and tell me you still love me. PLEASE!”. It’s beyond words that she sent that to the girlfriend.

    • scammy wow says:

      The thing is, there is nothing of worth in that email to forward to him. It was all just a lie so she could see that they were still sleeping together. His email not working – yeah, right!

      Anyone remember the Betty Broderick story?

    • Basically, all it said was cut your shit out, please.

      • ShesJustStupid says:

        In response to her posting stuff on her blog or contacting him directly?

        And, yeah–the whole point of this email was to let the fiance know he was sleeping with JABs when they first started dating.

        God, I hope his wedding somehow makes a spread in Vanity Fair or something.

      • Jacy says:

        Both. Gist of message was: Back off. I am obviously not interested in communicating with you. I consider your behavior borderline stalking. Stop being such an asshole. Go away.

  8. Kitler says:

    Very nice Jacy, liebling. See, I tolt you dat you could do it. Ja.

    Love,
    AK

  9. bettedavis says:

    Wow, mortified. That is some deranged shit. What an ugly cunt. I’m not surprised to learn that Meg and Lasagna continue to enable her by not discouraging this. I’m sure both are reading — do you two not see that your friend is mentally ill?

    Especially after yesterday’s manic episode, Julia is going to be hysterical when she wakes up and sees this. Mommy Bogger’s work is going to be cut out for her today!

  10. This email always amazes me because it shows just how delusional and crazy she is. She really believes everything she is saying.

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      You seem surprised that she’s unbalanced and not in touch with reality.

  11. kat says:

    oh. my. how amazingly embarrassing!

  12. Fred Grott says:

    Hi Jules,

    We can see why only Mark Z is the one for you..how is that plan to marry Mark Z going btw?

  13. Jacy says:

    The other ridiculous thing is that “e-mail not working” = he was not replying.

    Not that they bounced back. No, he simply wasn’t replying. So she stomped her foot and sent the reply to his fiancee. Because she is SUCH a nice person.

    • darling melissa sue £ says:

      Learn to take a hint, Donkey.

      Also, they are MY MEMORIES, too.

      • I Like Colors (Bright) and Rainbows says:

        Ugh that shit is so infuriorating. Want to know who cares about “YOUR MEMORIES”, Jules? A fucking THERAPIST. 4 walls and a therapist are the only ones who care, and the therapist cares because you will pay him $125 an hour.

        So entitled and childish.

    • scammy wow says:

      That’s exactly what I meant. That was all a ploy to make it seem as though she needed the fiance to “relay” her all-important message. There isn’t anything that she could say to him that would be of value to him. They aren’t in contact anymore, so he obviously doesn’t care. It’s too bad more women don’t value their dignity anymore.

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      I’m thinking that she had no intention of sending it to the guy, but wanted the fiancee to know (or believe) that her husband-to-be was fucking a donkey while he was dating her.

  14. Arl says:

    She is so unhinged. And obviously a liar. She hasn’t seen him physically since June of 2007, yet she was sleeping with him “well through” summer 2007? Am I to assume blindfolds were involved?

    • darling melissa sue £ says:

      Why mention that they were sleeping together at all in such detail unless doing it to hurt his fiance? They were both there. They know about the overlapping/sleeping around. For goodness sake. She needs to be ashamed, not us.

      • Jacy says:

        You should be ashamed of yourself for suggesting she should be ashamed of herself. Shame on you!

      • bettedavis says:

        I agree, this was written for M’s fiance to read. Despicable.

        She really shoes her true colors here. What a way to treat the “love of your life.” God Julia, you supposedly broke his heart with all your Milo-from-Heroes whoring and Dave Z fingerbanging. She got the job at Star in June 2007 and decided she was on her way to better prospects. Wasn’t she seeing JL by the Fourth of July? She just won’t admit to herself that he now sees her as we all do.

      • Darling Peltskank says:

        Much worse than the overlap is her claim that he still told her he loved her while already dating the other one. What better way to undermine someone’s faith in their partner than to suggest that they were not just fucking, but in love with someone else when they started the new relationship. See Psychological Warfare 101, section transparent divisive strategies.
        Manipulative, vindictive, putrid, gutter dwelling, pelty CUNT.

      • darling melissa sue £ says:

        Peltskank, maybe that’s what JA intended, but I sincerely hope that M’s fiance does not let this get to her.

        These are the unreliably insane, bitchy, intentionally hurtful ramblings of his psychotic ex. She is a known liar, and even if there’s some small kernel of truth to her words, these events happened before she and M were serious, before they knew each other well and before he committed to spending the rest of his life with her.

        If you’re reading, don’t let this pelty cunt get to you. She is not worth it.

      • Darling Peltskank says:

        Melissa Sue, I never thought that the fiancee would give any credence to this, but I’m foaming at the mouth at the audacity of this chunky failure to employ the cheapest and lowest possible undermining strategies. Because we all know there was only one objective behind this email: Shake the fiancee’s confidence in this relationship and break them up. At the same time she’s receiving the appropriate punishment – she’s all alone (her nutter family aside), her exes, for the most part, are not. Enjoy lifelong spinsterdom, you ugly hag, you worked hard enough to earn it.

    • worrisome pelts says:

      Silly Arl, she means she couldn’t see him through her completely normal and not at all worrisome sex-induced crying jags.

      PS – Gutter Cunt

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      Wouldn’t blinders be more appropriate for a donkey?

    • dd says:

      She had a picture of her and him together on her blog. I think it was in Davos in 2008 (I think). So she is lying about not seeing him since 2007. She was smugly smiling and he looked like he was angry. It was almost like she ambushed him and made him stand for a picture.

      • bettedavis says:

        I don’t remember that. He was at Davos?

      • dd says:

        I think it was Davos. Some big conference anyway.

      • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

        I can’t help but think maybe you’re mistaking an event, a person or a time, maybe a combo of, or all three? Wasn’t Davos in January of ’09? Not sure what the guy does ~ is he even in that circle?

      • Jacy says:

        Yeah. The only photos I remember her posting of them was from several years ago. She posted them in a pathetic “this was the most amazing man I ever knew” post a couple of years ago.

    • dd says:

      I may the the time period screwed up, but there was a picture of them on her blog long after they ended things and he was with his fiance. He did not look happy in the photo.

  15. Jacy says:

    The thing is, this post won’t bother her. She honestly believes there is nothing wrong about what she did in this episode. That is how we know she is truly crazy — she cannot distinguish between right and wrong if she’s advancing her agenda. Anything goes.

    • Darling Peltskank says:

      That’s what’s so, in her own words, worrisome about her. Because she may not be bothered by this, but, oh how she should be. And when will her delusional family finally wake up to the fact that their daughter is not a character, but outright insane and in need of some kind of treatment?

    • PinkDenofIniquity says:

      Ding Ding Ding! I had an ex who’s moral compass swayed in whichever direction was the most advantageous to him. Something could be “right” because it advanced him, his story, his life experience, whatever. People, do not date self-obsessed aspiring novelists! Or Donkeys!

    • Jacy says:

      I was pretty much raised by my older sister because my mother’s a loon, but anyway, if my sister knew that I’d done such a thing to an ex’s new GF, she would have ripped me a new asshole, made me get some therapy and basically kicked my ass so that if I ever even pondered doing something so psycho again, I would think twice.

      If either of her parents know she does this kind of shit and don’t read her the riot act, they are as nutso as she is. Then again, we already knew that.

  16. Darling Peltskank says:

    There are no words. Oh wait, here’s one: VILE!

  17. Sweaty 5K Pelts says:

    GROSS. Really, really gross. To send this to someone’s fiancee is a terrible thing to do. I hope she never, ever contacts them again and that the two of them, whoever they are, go on to have a beautiful marriage and a happy life together.

  18. FaFail Waldorf says:

    This is disgusting. I honestly can’t comprehend ANY woman who resorts to psychotic ex-girlfriend scheming (including close friends of my own) because I can’t fathom how delusional and shameless people can be and I don’t give passes for depression or desperation, and I prefer to just pretend they don’t exist. But seriously. This lady doesn’t deserve any man. Oh, look! I don’t even believe in karma, but, karma, Donk.

    • Jacy says:

      And all the boo-hooing she does about guys who have done her wrong and cheated on her — and yet she herself has admitted she’s a chronic cheat, has screwed other women’s husbands, has messed with her ex’s new partners, etc. … yet she can’t see the irony.

  19. juliaspublicist says:

    She can’t be upset about this, because when you put something out on the Internet, especially Facebook, how can you ever expect it to be private?

    • Julia's Fat Ass says:

      Exactly. Wonder if she’ll rethink that one now?

      I would expect a very strongly worded email from her shortly. “I didn’t give you permission to publish this! It was a PRIVATE EMAIL to the current fiance of someone who really, really loved me once. If you ever, EVER, publish another PRIVATE EMAIL again, I swear to God, I will get a lawyer and sue you. TAKE THIS DOWN NOW. MICHAEL DOESN”T DESERVE THIS.” Or along those lines.

  20. HAHAHAHA JULIA HAHAHA says:

    Can we please forward this to former exes and all future men she has her eyes on?

  21. It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

    WTF does this lying, manipulative, busted-face cunty ho of a donkey, aka Julia Allison Baugher, need ‘closure’ for, anyway?

    She didn’t give a damn about the guy, & to say she was sleeping w/ him into summer of ’07 is so highly doubtful, when, by her own words in December of ’07, he’d walked away & never looked back (before the year was even started):

    I screwed it up … badly
    I gave nothing back
    I was so fucked up

    I said no. That was it for him
    He found someone else

    I want to tell him I’m sorry
    … normal, emotionally healthy Julia I am today
    he won’t call me back

    Why was Julia Allison Baugher (Hello again, Julia’s Google Alert!) even bugging him in Dec’ of last year, a time she was allegedly juggling Hipster Lawyer & Prom King (these fucking Escort Service theme date names!)?

    Julia Allison Baugher is vile & reprehensible. I’m sure JW aka PK & his family have drawn numerous breaths of relief to have gotten the fuck away from this psycho & her demented lackey, Lasagna.

    I end my rant w/ just a few words that will never be uttered on behalf of Julia Allison Baugher:
    Best wishes to the happy couple

    • Julia's Fat Ass says:

      I love that part. Closure my ass. Closure is that he ignores you, cunt.

    • scammy wow says:

      I remember my cousin’s ex calling his current gf and saying, “He’s in bed with me right now.” Little did she know, he was with the current gf AT THE TIME OF THE CALL. LOL!!

  22. (hese are my memories, too. says:

    It’s very simple. An open-and-shut case of NPD coupled with a classic sociopath diagnosis. She’s been this way since she was a kid, was this way at Georgetown and will always be like this. Whatever it take to get what she wants, including trampling on loved ones to get there. If anything, just sad. Her parent should have recognized this and had her in therapy many moons ago.

    • qwerty says:

      Having dealt with people like her, I can just imagine JA editing that email for hours during a cray-cray insomniac cycle until it was, in her twisted mind, the perfect missile peppered with Twisted Facts, Ironic Smilies and “Classy Jabs”.

      ’cause she’s the one who’s been wronged here, people!!!

      The whole thing reeks of teenage narcissistic vitriol. The donkey in question is almost 30.

      I feel nauseous.

  23. Donkeeyyyyyy says:

    Wow. Wooowwwwwww. I am currently the girlfriend in a similar situation. His ex won’t fucking stop texting him, facebooking him, shit talking me behind my back… we have been together for over a year. WHAT THE FUCK! People like this are the lowest of the low. Complete attention whores with no respect for anyone elses’ feelings, living in a delusional world where everyone thinks they are great. The thought of receiving an email like this from his ex makes me physically sick. It looks like Micheal’s gf took the high road here. I’m impressed. I’m not sure I would be able to do the same. UGHHHHH

  24. itsjustme says:

    Wow. That’s all I got.

  25. Julia's Fat Ass says:

    It’s hilarious though. “What are you TALKING ABOUT? I’m not STALKING YOU! I’ve only contacted you a few times! What’s wrong with emailing your girlfriend to get in touch with you on my behalf and including that we used to fuck while you dated? Calm down. Don’t take me so seriously. Ttyl! :)”

    • qwerty says:

      “You sound disproportionately angry! I’ve only blogged and reblogged about your undying love for meeeeee and your presents and trips and general bestness as a boyfriend and me wanting you back, like, 12,959 times since we broke up! It’s only on the World Wide Internets, what’s the big deal?

      I don’t care that you’ve repeatedly asked me to not to call/email/smoke signal you or blog about you! THEY ARE MY MEMORIES TOO!

      Toodles!

      xoxo

      PS. You better invite me to the wedding, otherwise I’ll send you a handmade memory box thingy instead of a real gift.

      PPS. Call me!”

  26. Scooby Don't says:

    Someone needs to do the top secret KiwiCall.
    I’d love to see how she spins this in Julia’s favour and blames Jacy for being so mean as to publish JAB’s private email.

    • darling melissa sue £ says:

      WHAT?! But nothing’s private on the Internet and no one should be allowed to be anonymous. Isn’t that JA’s thing. I would think she would write JP and Jacy a letter of thanks for sharing this with the world.

  27. twankle toes says:

    The “you would have a hard time proving stalking” with a fucking smiley face after it literally made me shudder. Girl is delusional and completely out of her mind. The way she thinks she can just talk her way out of her past crazy behavior is always so creepy. I mean, they’re his memories too, ya know? Also, cling to the fact he banged you once or twice during his first few dates with his new girlfirend until he realized what a relationship could be and then ran the other way and refused to even speak to you. It makes you look great, really well respected as usual. Donkey, sometimes a fuck is just a fuck, sometimes people say “I love you” when they don’t really mean it, or before they know what love feels like. You my dear have proven time and time again to be a classless, tacky wench and no man has stuck around for more than the first few screws in many, many years. Figure it out fat ass!!!!!

    • darling melissa sue £ says:

      Also, cling to the fact he banged you once or twice during his first few dates with his new girlfriend until he realized what a relationship could be and then ran the other way and refused to even speak to you. It makes you look great, really well respected as usual.

      THIS, THIS, THIS x1,900,000!! Twankle Toes, this is what I have been thinking but unable to put into words.

    • dd says:

      Right? In her crazy mind she was thinking “Oh silly boy. You think you can get away from me that easily? I have learned from all of my other stalking victims how much I can actually stalk before I received a restraining order so MUHAHAHA you can’t prove that I stalked you!! I am well within the stalking limit of the law!!!”

      • "Donkey Shaame, Daaarling Donkey Shame..." ♪ ♫ says:

        I’m totally picturing her saying that dressed as the witch from Sleeping Beauty, staring at her own reflection in an enormous cauldron of Blueprint Cleanse.

    • PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY says:

      she’s so hand that rocks the cradle.

  28. Julia's Fat Ass says:

    There’s just so much goodness to parse. She hasn’t emailed him in a year. But she FACEBOOK MESSAGED HIM TWICE in that time. Obviously that doesn’t count. It’s not EMAIL.

    Legalese, people.

    I almost wish I were the fiance, so I would have an excuse to kick her ass.

    • Not to mention blogged about him RELENTLESSLY.

      • qwerty says:

        …and reblogged all her older blog posts about him/their love/his omgPRESENTS.

        While she was repeatedly being asked to stop it.

        She’s nutso. And evil.

      • I Like Colors (Bright) and Rainbows says:

        And her new boyfriend copied his gifting behavior, I’m sure that was unprompted.

    • Andy Wintour Hacks (up a furball) says:

      …and then blogged about sobbing over blogging about him.

      …and then blogged about sobbing over reading old letters he wrote.

      …and then blogged about sobbing over him not returning her emails.

      …and then blogged about sobbing over PK, then sobbing over M again, and back to PK, and then back to M…

  29. itsjustme says:

    “I’ve always said nice things about you”

    especially this:

    “Perhaps you’re embarrassed because you overlapped [REDACTED] and me? Because we were still sleeping together and you were still telling me you loved me up well through the summer of 2007, when you were dating her? I assumed that she knew that, but perhaps she didn’t.”

    SO NICE!

  30. AnnaPelt Is Happy at 138 says:

    I love how many creative usages of the word “cunt” there are above. That’s really the only word that comes close to describing her.

  31. wonkeye says:

    She’s like a completely unbelievable, over-the-top soap character! She makes Erika Kane look like a down-to-earth sweetheart. Alexis Carrington pales in comparison. Dr. Kimberly Shaw seems completely sane when lined up next to the donkey! Who pulls shit like this? Will she be blaming this on an evil twin?

  32. itsjustme says:

    “I’m actually exceptionally grateful that you finally responded – at least I can move on now!! I wish we could have been friends, but I have my answer. Thank you for that.”

    Translation:

    Ahahaha. I pissed you off enough to get an answer!! That’s what I wanted! Hopefully I pissed off your fiance enough to maybe break up your engagement too. Oh, but I’m just trying to be nice and be friends with you, but you are too immature I guess. Because I’m SO NICE.

  33. "Donkey Shaame, Daaarling Donkey Shame..." ♪ ♫ says:

    I feel like I’m covered in donkey filth after reading this.

  34. cara says:

    I had a stalker who did this sort of shit. The first line of defense was ceasing all communication. Then I changed my email address and phone number, and I moved. So he took to sending emails to my parents, asking them to relay them to me, and these emails were similarly manipulative, clearly intended to cause some kind of destruction within my family, all under the guise of sweetness. When my parents didn’t give him the response he wanted, he took it up a notch and gave us enough for a permanent restraining order. Which he violated.

    If someone’s not responding, or responding by telling you to stop, and you keep going, you’re a stalker. I hope her ex + fiancee get a restraining order. Unsurprisingly, Julia and my stalker share characteristics: severe delusion, narcissism, sociopathy, mania.

    • sad lilly says:

      Don’t forget self pity and the ability to only shed a tear for yourself.

      • cara says:

        That’s true! He had the spectacular ability to distort every situation so that he was always the victim. (He was just trying to be nice!) Seriously, she’s the female version of this fucker.

    • sad lilly says:

      I also had someone in my life like that. We still have to communicate because of kid issues. I just tone out the “poor me” parts of the conversations.

    • Restylame says:

      I also had someone in my life like that. After I cut things off with him (to his over-the-top dismay), and wouldn’t respond to any of his calls/emails/FB messages, he took it upon himself to: email my roommate to see if he’d let her in my room to “leave something on my bed”, email one of my best friends one month, email my other best friend the next month….all the while being extremely manipulative and trying to get certain responses from them. None of them budged, except the third; she responded nicely because she “felt bad” (we all knew him for years) but then stopped.

      He showed up to my apartment building amid all of this and left a roses, a gift, and a creepy handwritten letter with a security guard who didn’t know me….thankfully he left and I was able to sort through the junk in peace. But I was truly scared and considered contacting police. He’s pretty angry and violent though, so I didn’t get a restraining order — if you’ve read “The Gift of Fear”, it’s pretty clear that a piece of paper will only incite naturally angry people even more instead of keeping them away.

      Anywhodoggie. This kind of stuff. Creepy.

    • Creepy Smiley Face says:

      My creepy stalker ex Googled my fiance, and emailed his work address, asking him how much it would cost to rent me out the night of our honeymoon so I could gargle his cum. I never did this or am into doing bukake tricks, by the way. Just goes to show how low people will sink.

    • Andy Wintour Hacks (up a furball) says:

      I don’t know what you all are talking about. It baffles me that M didn’t dump his fiance and go back to JA as the email came through. Writing things like this always works with getting the ex’s back, don’t they? DON’T THEY?!!!!

  35. Donksers says:

    Granted, Donkey is responsible for her own actions but how, at almost 30 years old, can she not have at least one close friend who says to her (FOR HER OWN GOOD) “Knock this shit off, Julia.” I think she probably inherited her cray-cray from Momsers and Dadsers but her nasty-to-the-core trait is her own doing.

    • bettedavis says:

      Her parents are strange but I get the impression that both of her parents are critical. They wanted a nice, respectable daughter with a career and normal life. That’s what she was rebelling against as a teenager and she’s never outgrown it.

      • Julia's Fat Ass says:

        If they were truly critical, they would cut off her credit cards, stop paying her rent, and make her get a goddamn job, like a normal adult. They suck.

    • it sounds like the people who do speak up (or at least don’t follow her script) are the ones she shuts out of her life.

      which is incredibly tragic.

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      Seriously, what sane person do you expect would want to hang around her for more than a few minutes, let alone long enough to become a close friend?

  36. bettedavis says:

    Jacy, I’m glad you posted this while Julie’s at home in Chicago. I hope her parents read this. This is calculated and truly disturbing behavior — maybe they know she’s a little unstable, but this is beyond that. We haven’t heard from her yet this morning. What’s going on in that household right now?

    • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

      “We haven’t heard from her yet this morning. What’s going on in that household right now?”

      I anticipate a Narcissistic Rage of utmost proportion, resulting in another aggressive onslaught of La Donk onto RBNS (&/or into Chat) ~ she courts negative ATTN & is constantly on the lookout for slights.

  37. PinkDenofIniquity says:

    I have to admit that I’ve definitely let my mind wander into fantasy of this nature when pissed at an ex and his new gf. The difference between me and JA? I never ACTED on any of these fantasy urges, and years later, boy am I glad. The high road is always the best road. I would be absolutely mortified looking back on actions like these. Fuck, I would be mortified the second I hit send.

    I was just talking to a friend last night about this– it doesn’t make you crazy to think about these things… It makes you crazy to ACT on them. The fact that JA sent this to the gf with the info about them sleeping together makes me absolutely sick to my stomach. I hope this woman is fierce and strong and realizes that these are the actions of a crazy person that need to be ignored. And if she forwarded it, god bless her soul.

    • Restylame says:

      Bingo. Before I was over my ex, I used to have elaborate daydreams about bumping into his new chica on the street and tripping her or something. Lol. But I clearly never sought her out in any way, and would never DREAM of contacting her (or him, even).

  38. Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

    Truly living up to the name JABa the Nut.

  39. Delurked says:

    the “I’m sorry you’re upset” is the biggest bullshit apology in the world.

    • I DEMAND CLOSURE!! says:

      It’s the biggest non-apology going. Basically not taking any responsibility and placing the ‘your the one with the problem’ situation squarely on the victim.

      • dd says:

        And the best part is she “learned to forgive herself for her past misdeeds while at the ashram!” So nope, she is not feeling bad about this email.

  40. itsjustme says:

    I’m not gonna be ignored, Dan!

    • Ehehehe says:

      Omg this.

    • Rumplepeltskin says:

      you need to call him Cancer Dan. Because that’s why she uses him as a character in her sad novel of tragedies. If he didn’t have the cancer backstory, he wouldn’t be useful at all.

  41. Um? says:

    “I’m actually exceptionally grateful that you finally responded – at least I can move on now!! ”

    Except she couldn’t. Because she still expected a response to THIS e-mail. And when she didn’t get one, she forwarded this to his fiance. Closure for her is either winning him back or doing her damnedest to fuck up his relationship. So NICE!

    • Julia's Fat Ass says:

      IT’s amazing. Someone fucking IGNORING YOU is not enough of a message? Do they have to sky write that you are an insufferable wench and they want nothing to do with you? Typically when people refuse to respond, normal, emotionally healthy people take that as a sign that their advances are not wanted.

      But no, there she was, clomping and stomping and demanding “closure” in whatever form was acceptable to her. Closure of course being “Can I come over and worship you again like the olden days?” Nice try there, failpants.

      • Um? says:

        And please tell me why she needed closure on a relationship SHE ended (in “early 2007” i.e. not June, according to archived posts)?

      • scammy wow says:

        This is such a bad script of “High Fidelity.”

      • Julia's Fat Ass says:

        Seriously, UM. SHE ENDED IT. And she admitttedly treated him like shit. She wants fucking closure?

  42. piece bitch says:

    i’m a long time RBNS reader, first time commentator.

    JA is fucking insane. truly truly fucking insane.

    what i can’t wrap my head around is that she is spending all this time around her parents at the moment and they apparently aren’t seeking professional help for her.
    she is clearly a very sick girl who needs some inpatient help. are her parents engaging in willful blindness of her insanity or is her entire family deluded?

    • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

      Yes & Yes.

      Part of her twisted psyche stems from her upbringing, & for them to deal w/ *it* as opposed to continually enabling her would mean they’d have to delve into their own actions & personality quirks.

      She’s constantly back home w/ Momser & Dadser because they’re the only people she’s got left (IRL, not counting her bought & paid-for Afghani FB fans), who reflect her false self back to her.

      She’s got to be mightily annoyed by now, (after what 2-3 days?), of ATTN Momser is giving to the care-taking of the grandfather.

      Welcome to RBNS, BTW.

    • FaFail Waldorf says:

      She’s 30, and they’re nuts too?

      I might be biased because I don’t have some big soft spot for families and their values, parents and their spawn, etc, but I think with her well into adulthood (past her expiration, if you will!), they have no obligation to shrink wrap their lil burro.

      Maybe they don’t care. Maybe they like laughing at her. Save Peter & Robin! They’re old and eccentric but at least they’re functional humans.

      I have no sympathy for her crazy ass. Don’t care if she’s certifiable.

      • piece bitch says:

        i don’t have sympathy for her either but she has clearly crossed the threshold of keeping her crazy to herself and how she is maliciously invading other people’s lives.
        at that point you would think her parents would want to intervene because of the havoc she is causing amongst the general populace.

        like “its always shitty” said, she really has no else at this point, so if she is going to receive help it is going to have to come from her parents whether they like it or not.

    • Julia's Fat Ass says:

      The thing is, if it’s true that she has some kind of narcissistic personality disorder or sociopathy, from what I’ve read (admittedly not a lot), there is no treatment. She’s kind of just an awful person. There is no medication for a sociopath, that I know of.

      But the enabling bullshit. If I acted the way she does my parents would slap me senseless, figuratively speaking. And someone is bankrolling this bitch. Contrary to what she said in that learning annex class, there is no fucking way endorsements, tv pilots and writing gigs pay for her lifestyle.

      • LickedRandi'sCake says:

        If she’s not careful someone is going to slap her senseless, literally. Again. Just like the sister of the boyfriend she had in college. That girls was an American hero.

      • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        Licked,

        Didn’t she once say that she found that fight “exhilarating” or something like that?

      • LickedRandi'sCake says:

        I actually don’t remember a comment from her about it but it wouldn’t surprise me It’s called saving face. Which is ironic considering what Dr. Bobby has done to her.

      • Jacy says:

        Yes, she did say that. She said if you haven’t been in a girl fight, you should be in one, because she found it exhilarating or some such thing. I volunteer. I’d like to go a few rounds with her.

        When two tribes go to war ……

      • Rumplepeltskin says:

        talk therapy only enables sociopaths. this is because they are too manipulative to engage and reconsider their own thoughts and actions. at least for a few months, she’d need to be medicated while attempting therapy and even then there is no guarantee.

        many psychiatrists would take a pass on treating someone like jankles.

      • XX says:

        There is experimental therapy for NPD. This would call for treatment by a clinical psychologist, not a psychiatrist.

      • piece bitch says:

        there is no medication but with long-term hardcore inpatient treatment she may be able to somewhat integrate herself into society.

        and that is the thing that really stands out for me.
        nothing about the way she lives her life is even remotely normal. her behaviour is straight up not tolerated in any other realm of the universe other than her own. she does not function within our larger society and that is the most bizarre thing. its like watching a someone in the midst of a full scale schizophrenic episode attempting to blend in.

        it is abundantly clear that someone is paying for her life, but i thought it was her grandmother. how much you want to bet JA is going to bleed that poor woman dry if she ever becomes senile?

        she would be the type to find a physical confrontation with an ex-boyfriend’s sister “exhilarating”.
        don’t worry your delusional little head JA. homegirl didn’t beat your ass because you committed credit card fraud in her brother’s name. she did it so you could have an “exhilarating” life experience.

        holy fuck.

  43. PhillyHoya says:

    I am shocked that no one has ever filed a restraining order against her. There are more than enough pieces of evidence for several people to do so.

  44. Julia's Old Nose says:

    WOOOOOOAH.

    How absolutely classless to send this message to his fiancee, especially with the part mentioning that they were still sleeping together when [REDACTED] and the fiancee began dating.

    She should be ashamed of herself for inserting herself into his life repeatedly — both directly and on the web via her blog — when he has asked her to stop. So manipulative and destructive.

    I hope she doesn’t believe in karma, because this kind of nasty comes back to bite.

  45. STOP THE WORLD! RUE MCCLANAHAN DIED!!!!!!!!!!!

  46. idiotbox says:

    this is so fabulous (better than anything i heard!) that i have to change my pants, excuse me.

  47. Donksers says:

    Sorry about the OT but I just read where Mary uses fruity scents to awaken her “sences.” How can anyone be this stupid every minute of every day? And is it a requirement for NS contributors, past and present, to have IQs under 80?

    • Darling ♪ ♫ Stalker is the new ♪ ♫ Fat k'donk k'donk says:

      Her mom is a handy man!

    • Darling ♪ ♫ Stalker is the new ♪ ♫ Fat k'donk k'donk says:

      also Along with bright yellow tops and oranges in my salad, soaps and scents are one of my favorite ways to brighten my day.

      which, again, literally: no sense.

      It’s comedy gold over there, damn.

      • Darling ♪ ♫ Stalker is the new ♪ ♫ Fat k'donk k'donk says:

        oh wait, I think I get it.. yellow tops=yellow SHIRT. I thought she was putting some yellow top..of something.. in her salad..

        I don’t even.

        How fuck.

      • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

        Nahhh. I think she’s actually ingesting bright & sunny little toys that spin on their axis ~ only MareMare Beach Hair would define the gyroscopic effect as enjoyment of a Greek meal (salad only; hold the actual food).

      • twankle toes says:

        This made me LOL. Her blog is out of control stupid lately. All of her posts are 2 sentences about the most mudane things and paired with a descriptive picture and I have yet to see a post where I have any idea what she’s trying to imply. I can’t believe anyone would hire her as some sort of Internet comm guru or whatever she’s pretending to be this month.

      • CutRateBling says:

        Yellow tops–wasn’t that the freebie heroin given away on the Wire? The vials were stopped with a yellow plastic lid. A tip for the budget-conscious!

    • jpa says:

      My personal favorite is her talent of editing people’s resumes. She’s fit into this headhunting “roll”

    • fuck camping! says:

      oh man, mary gives me the lols. it’s like the shortbus comedy hour over there. hell, her incoherence is passing even that of meghannaise.

      • darling melissa sue £ says:

        be fair, fuck! it only SEEMS like marmar is dumber than mega because mega so rarely says anything. let’s not forget is if the internet is female!

  48. scammy wow says:

    So no clue as to what happened to make Jordan and her part ways? No crazy emails there? There HAVE to be some.

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      There’s probably enough to embarrass the shit out of each side so that they don’t publicly divulge.

      Sort of like Mutually Assured Destruction.

  49. Mrs. Middleschmertz says:

    Does anyone know the time-line on this missive? Just wondering if this was the “insensitivity” issue that broke Mr. Money-Train’s back.

    • This is during the Post Wallet Thing Melt Down.

      • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

        When she was coincidentally bemoaning the rapid departure of Prom King?

        “Prior to that, I never felt like I was ready for marriage – even when Alex and I discussed it, or when Michael and I discussed it, I made it very clear that I wasn’t ready. And I hadn’t been ready at any other point in the last three years. But with Prom King … well, he was the first guy I’ve dated seriously that I really spent time thinking “What would it be like to spend my life with this guy, to raise children with him, to grow old with him, to have a family with him?” And I suppose that might be one of the reasons I’m taking this so hard.”

  50. scammy wow says:

    I just can’t get over this. What’s astounding to me is just the utter disregard for how the other person feels. It’s like, “No, I need to have closure so I can feel better.” Maybe you just need to get over it, and not do it again. Sometimes, silence is louder than yelling at someone or just telling them that you have moved on and you don’t give a shit about their closure or what happened because now you’ve found THE ONE and no one else matters. Is that so hard to comprehend?

  51. Julia's Fat Ass says:

    Whoever is responsible for that screenshot, good job. Jesus Christ look at that thing. That makeup, the ratty hair, the double chin. Her outside is really catching up with her insides.

  52. Her constant use of her special SAT word “disproportionately” always cracks me up — as if she has any sense of *proportion* whatsoever (aesthetic, moral or otherwise.)

  53. Mrs. Middleschmertz says:

    You never wish anyone “Good Luck” with their marriage; that’s very poor etiquette.

    It’s always “Best Wishes.” Ya know, when one actually does mean it in a well-adjusted, emotionally healthy kind of way.

    I hope the ashram extracted some of this venom. This is an ugly display of out-of-control jealousy.

    • darling melissa sue £ says:

      Seriously. I am about to get married, and if anyone wished me good luck, I might spit at them.

      Good luck?! FUCK YOU!!

    • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      I haven’t heard about this, and I don’t think I’ve ever said that to anyone getting married. But why is it such a bad thing to say? I don’t want to inadvertently offend anyone, so I appreciate knowing this now.

      • Anonymous says:

        “Best Wishes” means you hope everything goes well for the couple in their lives together… “Good Luck” means there’s a reason why you think they’ll need “luck” to find happiness. Sort of just an “undertone” thing I guess. I don’t know if I explained it as well as possible, but that’s how I’ve always thought about it. As if saying “Good Luck” is said with the tone of “hah, yeah, GOOD LUCK with that.”

      • Because “Good Luck” implies “you’ll need it” (as does saying “Congratualtions” to the bride imply “good on you for managing to bag a man.”)

      • Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        Aha! Thanks for the answers! I don’t think I’ve ever said that to anyone getting married, but now I’ll make sure that I never do.

        RBNS: Educational, as well as entertaining!

      • Anonymous says:

        I’ve said it once. There was a reason. And I didn’t mean it to be nice.

        Difference is, the couple in question didn’t involve an ex of mine, I didn’t pretend it was a nice thing to say, and I don’t act like that with other getting-married friends…

        Also, Good Thoughts: I almost said the same exact thing, but deleted it out of my previous comment! I HATE HATE HATE IT when people “congratulate” others on getting engaged or married. If you find someone you love and want to spend your lives together, what’s there to “congratulate”? That makes it sound like the bride achieved some kind of a lofty lifelong goal of “wedding,” when really you should just be focused on the happiness and “finding love” of it all. I once heard someone congratulate my friend who’s getting married, and her response was, “For what? I didn’t do anything worth congratulating, it’s not like I just got promoted or something.” But that’s why I love her.

      • piece bitch says:

        my husband and i got married in december ’09 and throughout the whole process of getting my last name changed on everything (his last name is cooler than my maiden one), everyone i encountered tripped over themselves to congratulate me.
        i got married to the dude i love who i also happened to have been living with for the last four years, i didn’t perform open heart surgery using a spork and a taco del mar napkin.

  54. Jacy says:

    The Donkey Has Risen to wish “Momsers” a happy 60th birthday!

    • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

      Yeah, wtf is up w/ using the old pic from a year ago that features Donkey?

      Donkey has a brand-spanking-new freebie Canon & could take a very nice pic of Momser w/ her father (the grandfather, not that other father, IE: Donkey’s main squeeze)?

      (I know, I KNOW ~ ‘wherein the question lies the answer?’)

  55. EinsteinJulia says:

    I’m so disgusted by this that I can’t even form a coherent reply. This CLEARLY was not written to the ex, it was written to his new fiance. I thought it couldn’t get worse until the PS – shades of “if you don’t invite me, i will show up anyway with a fully captioned scrapbook of our fucky times” just to scare the shit out of fiance.

    Also, Julia has horrible friends. They all deserve the worst possible karma for enabling this shit.

  56. temporary feminazi says:

    UGH!!!!! i dealt with a boyfriends crazy ex in the past and it is TERRIBLE. i can only imagine how frustrating this must be since the two are engaged. The bitch that was bothering my beau spent 7 months trying to convince us that she was preggers– even going so far as to buy maternity clothes, stuff them, and send photographs of herself (in a dressing room). This girl was insane. At first i could deal with the BS because i knew she was lying (and he was and still is one of the greatest guys ive ever dated) but after a month it began wearing on me. I started blaming him for all the drama and, eventually, broke up with him.
    This email julie sent totally could have come from my ex’s stalker. I hope she doesn’t destroy this relationship with her bs. what a fucking TURD.

  57. I Like Colors (Bright) and Rainbows says:

    What is with these entitled brats and their sense that they deserve “closure” for every situation? Sometimes life doesn’t afford you closure. Sometimes your parent dies suddenly and you never get to say bye. Sometimes people leave and you never understand why or what you did, or if you did anything at all. Sometimes you’re a cunty wench and the guy you used to date wants nothing to do with you.

    Get over it you fucking moronic crybaby!! I wish she went to an ashram called “Getoveritaya Center for Getting the Fuck Over Some Petty Bullshit, You Dumb Bitch That’ll Be $1700 Thanks”.

    • fuck camping! says:

      someone please tweet julia with an offer to spend the rest of her life at the Getoveritaya Center. i’ll contribute fuck you pennies to the cause.

    • I Can See Your Uvula says:

      Personally, I don’t believe there is any such thing as “closure.” Really, in what universe does anyone think they get to meet for coffee, say all the right things, shake hands and be done with it.

      The idea that someone who behaves that badly can justify it as needing “closure” is offensive. Too often, people use “closure” as an excuse for poor judgment and lack of impulse control.

      “Case and Point” Donkey.

      • FaFail Waldorf says:

        I agree with this idea. I think closure tends to be little more than an excuse for acting like a petulant child when things don’t end the way you wanted them to.

        I mean, if you think about it, what does “closure” really help that time doesn’t? People fail to have “closure” all the time (it’s called DEATH) and regularly manage to move on without behaving like sociopathic stalker slutjowels – it’s always fug bishes with melting faces and bodies nothing like Kim Kardashian’s who start yapping about closure every time someone from their past dares to prefer a sane person’s perfectly symmetrical breasts to their own. Just brayin’!

      • Academic Stalker BSc Phd says:

        Agreed I Can See Your Uvula. Real bad things happen in life for which there is no narrative resolution. It’s childish to expect it.

      • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        She doesn’t really want closure. That would mean putting it all behind her and never having anything to do with him or his life ever again.

        Nope, she is deranged enough to believe that if she could somehow get together with him just to “chat” that he’d fall back in love with her, dump his fiancee, and rush Donkey to the altar instead, because that is really what he’s been wanting to do all along. That is how her fucked up mind works.

      • fuck camping! says:

        is this the donkey wedding you are looking for?

      • Andy Wintour Hacks (up a furball) says:

        Agreed! “Closure” is what people lie to themselves in order to give the other person “a chance” in hopes that the other person tells them everything they want to hear, like oh I really messed up, and you’re everything I ever needed…and in response you would say, I forgive you..yada yada. All crap!

        It has never n the history of the universe ever ended up that way…for anyone! So what is “closure” really? It’s inviting the other person to tell you all the things you don’t want to hear, as if it would somehow make hearing those things ok. And then you start justifying those reasons as truth. Well, I wasn’t attentive, or he fell in love with someone else, or blah blah anything. Again, crap!

        Why isn’t it enough to know that it’s done and that’s that? If someone wants to be with me, they will. End of story. I will never validate anyone’s lame excuses for not being with me by searching for “closure”.

    • Darling Peltskank says:

      Isn’t “closure” essentially getting over it? Therefore, I’m all for Getoveritaya Yoga, but only if it’s called Getoveritaya Yoga RANCH.
      Nonetheless, inspired, I like colors (bright) and rainbows!

      • I Like Colors (Bright) and Rainbows says:

        Well, closure implies a resolution. Getoveritaya focuses on the principles of moving on regarding of resolution or lack thereof, and assists with discontinuing the dellusion that one’s life is a romantic comedy script.

        Namaste.

      • New Year New You says:

        Getoveritaya is gold. We need to develop this and start and RBNS ranch.

  58. natasha says:

    A couple of things:

    1) Wow, this is batshit. And I thought I’d pulled some crazy ex-gf moves. Not even close.

    2) Despite the craziness, I truly hope what she’s saying about Michael being with her and telling her he loved her while dating his current is a lie. Because I suspect someone who’d date the Donkey is either totally blind, or a little evil himself. And that would suck for the fiancee, if that information is true. I can’t imagine marrying someone who started our relationship on a lie that way.

    3) If she responds to this post at all, it will be to say that “This was all before the ashram! I’m better now!”

    • Rumplepeltskin says:

      eh, a lot of guys aren’t sure they want to settle down and behave badly until they realize they want to settle down. this girl made him WANT to settle down, marry, have kids… donkey did not. but i can see how during/after dating donkey, you’d have a low opinion of women and not really want to settle down. so, why not fuck her on the side while he waits to meet “the one”. the overlap was probably extremely minimal.

      not that i’m justifying him, but i’ve done this myself… i didn’t realize my wife was “the one” until about 2 months in, mostly because i’d come out of a pretty stressful relationship before. i slept with that ex once, about 2 weeks after meeting my wife, while living in a different city (i eventually moved and took a job in the same city when we got engaged)

      anyway, i can see how this kind of thing happens, if it did happen.

      • darling melissa sue £ says:

        I second this, Rumple. “Misbehavior” isn’t so out of the ordinary before a guy meets a girl who makes him want to settle down. TwankleToes and I were making similar points above, but I think it bears repeating. I hope they don’t let Janks ruin their happiness.

      • I Can See Your Uvula says:

        Thirded – it’s kind of a gray area.

        Before you become exclusive with the new person, there can be a period of time when you may not realize how significant the new relationship is/will be and are still having desperation sex with the ex.

        It shouldn’t be interpreted as “cheating” in the early stage of a relationship. I hope the fiancee thought, “what a bitchy thing to say,” considered the source and went about her business.

      • Rumplepeltskin says:

        therse a whole period at the end of a relationship where, if its not a clean break, you still want someone to fuck, you still have regrets that “things didnt work out”, and where you can suspend belief for a few hours or an evening, or maybe an entire weekend… and just fuck your ex.

        this guy seems to have taken the high road in the last few yrs. donkey’s been saying crazy, inappropriately personal things. for the most part, he seems to have ignored or responded simply and clearly that she should stop intruding.

    • qwerty says:

      “3) If she responds to this post at all, it will be to say that “This was all before the ashram! I’m better now!”

      Mistakes were made! ™

  59. ShesJustStupid says:

    This email makes me believe she’s capable of stealing Jordan’s tiara.

    • Rumplepeltskin says:

      you had any doubt about that?

    • itsjustme says:

      This needs to come out.

    • Julia's Fat Ass says:

      You know what, I”m sorta coming around myself. The lawyer in me would still want to see some evidence, but this chick is capable of some evil, evil shit.

    • Jacy says:

      No shit. She has no boundaries, no sense of right and wrong, and a monstrous sense of entitlement. There has never been any doubt in my mind.

    • Darling Peltskank says:

      If you don’t want your most private details to be known to the world, don’t put them on facebook. If you don’t wan’t any of your things to be stolen, don’t leave your front door unlocked. It’s as simple as that.

    • Jack the Bulldog says:

      I always thought Juliar was suspect number one in Tiaragate. She does know right and wrong, but like alll textbook sociopaths, thinks the rules don’t apply to her. I do await the day she finds herself behind bars.

  60. The Missing Davos Report says:

    OT: This is nothing compared to the subject at hand but…isn’t it tacky to advertise to the world how old your parents are?

    • fuck camping! says:

      yeah, see below. i didn’t hit the reply button. :p

    • Julia's Fat Ass says:

      Totally. I posted my mother’s age on Facebook a few weeks back and she was NOT PLEASED.

      But I’m sure JA’s parents are so blissfully happy that they are above such considerations.

  61. fuck camping! says:

    i know you know this, but julia is like tack city. i mean, she tweeted that rosie and her wife were having a fight next door. dude, she is TOTALLY discreet.

    • qwerty says:

      She’s just so tired of “privacy” debates. It’s like complaining your neighbor is eavesdropping in the corridoor when you chose to live in the same building with a donkey!

      Bottom line, if you want something private, DON’T DO IT WITHIN 10 MILES OF JAB. It’s not terribly complicated.

  62. Sliding Barn Doors says:

    Life does not allow you to wrap up situations and relationships in pretty little pink bows. Sometimes, they end up ugly and with certain parties having regret. THAT IS LIFE. If she wants closure, she should examine her past behavior on her own, without involving anyone except possibly a therapist. She is constantly looking for acknowledgement and affirmation from external sources when that shit can really only come from within.

    She looks about fifty in that screengrab 😉

  63. Julia's Fat Ass says:

    Also, this bitch was NOT seeking closure. Duh. She wanted him to come crawling back. That was the “answer” she was looking for, yes, essentially.

    She really thinks she’s worthy of a great guy. She’s mistaken.

    • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia says:

      She didn’t want him when she had him & she’s on record having said as much. No. It’s just that her reality is to make *everything* about *her* ~ what she can’t stand here is that a pretty bride is going to be walking down the aisle w/ a handsome groom & none of the above is about her (until she *makes* it about her) ~ it’s the slight she’s always looking for so as to play mistreated victim again.

      • Julia's Fat Ass says:

        She THINKS she wants him. After all, he showered her with affection, worshipped her, “drew her baths” (VOMIT) and bought her stuff.

        Guaranteed if she actually god him, she’d treat him like shit again and dump him for the next one. That’s what she does. But she’s a classic case of wanting what she can’t have. She’ll never be happy with anyone because she’ll always think she deserves better.

  64. My Bald Runyon Canyon says:

    Has Julia weighed in on this one? I think [redacted] needs to stop acting like such a victim.

  65. Sacred Scrapbooks says:

    Timeline? She didn’t mention any overlap in her pity party post on March 29:

    “then I found out my ex Michael got engaged to the girl he began dating right after me”

    http://julia.nonsociety.com/post/483000021

  66. I Bray for Pay says:

    My god, Michael’s new fiance sounds pretty psychotic herself. She forwarded this email around to her friends?? If Jacy got this multiple times, how many people did she forward it to? Two dozen? Three dozen?? A hundred?? And each of those forwards would have needed a phone conversation or lengthy IM chat to explain the situation. This has consumed hundreds of hours and untold psychic energy, energy the fiancee could be giving to oh, her relationship with Michael, or wedding planning. The dumb bitch has let Julia into her brain and now she’s obsessing about Michael and Julia’s relationship. She sounds like she needs major therapy.

    Michael obviously has a soft spot for batshit crazy insane women.

    • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

      Michael obviously has a soft spot for batshit crazy insane women.

      This.

      • Expert Gay says:

        A lot of men do. They date crazy women not despite the batshit insanity, but because of it. I mean, women do this too. Crazy people are not boring, and not-boring is a major criterion for a good relationship. Of course, not-batshit is an even better criterion, but in the heat of the moment (whether that moment lasts an hour or a decade)…

      • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        I thoroughly distrust any male who had a relationship with her. If they spent more than 1 date with the crazy, braying donkey and instead of running for their lives decided to try and hit it, they are assholes.

        My rule is that any peen that was in Donkey gets nowhere near me.

    • Emily Gould's Trusty Google Alert says:

      If I got an email that crazy, you’d better believe I’d pass it on. And I wouldn’t assume she sent it directly to a hundred people; it could be a few friends who each emailed it to a few more, and then you’re getting into exponential growth.

      • Rumplepeltskin says:

        I’d forward something like that to at least a few friends, because it would make for a lot of LULZ. I mean, how desparate did Julez have to be to write that email?

        A crazy girl would’ve responded or had relationship problems bc of the email. No indication that any of that happened in this case.

      • itsjustme says:

        Yeah, I’d be forwarding that shit too.

      • Donksers says:

        I would absolutely forward the insane Donkey email! That kind of lunacy is too good to keep to yourself.

    • neverbotoxed says:

      I thought it was Julia who forwarded the email around, not his fiancee?

    • piece bitch says:

      as i said in my earlier comment i’m new here, but i honestly can’t believe your attacking the fiancé.

      if that bullshit showed up in my inbox i would have sucked a dick to get it on gawker.

      JA is a fucking psycho hose beast spewing malevolence every time she opens her brayhole. everyone needs to know how truly batshit insane she really is.

    • Donksers says:

      I kind of doubt if the fiance is “obsessing about Michael and Julia’s relationship.” She’s got better and happier things to do…like plan a wedding and a future with the love of her life. Best wishes to Michael and Redacted!

    • Anonymous says:

      And why is it that you think that none of his friends – who all hated her – didn’t send it in? People on this site are close to people. Go read the post on who knows her.

    • FaFail Waldorf says:

      LOL you’re joking, right? Because she forwarded some completely insane rant of an email from a Donkey she has never met, you assume she needs years of therapy? I’d forward it too! The email is HILARIOUS and DISGUSTING and PURE ENTERTAINMENT. I would want to tell everyone I know.

      I mean, sure, I don’t know the chick, she may be off the rails, but I don’t think forwarding an email is evidence enough to support that.

      But then, I’m also not in the camp that is going to hold Michael’s association with Julia against him for the rest of his life. This thread is chock-full of admissions of bitches playing the crazy ex-girlfriend card and talking about how much therapy they need to get over their own relationships – my point is, everyone does stupid things they regret. He can get a pass too. Seemingly, he moved on and never looked back. Good for him.

      • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        Yes, everyone does stupid things at one time or another, but most of us aren’t as blatantly off the rails as Julia is. And many of us did not need therapy to get over any relationships.

        And yes, I do hold it against any guy who thought it was a good idea to have a relationship with her. You have your opinions, and mine is that any man who does that is either a REALLY piss poor judge of character and I could never rely on his judgment in my life, or he is such a shallow prick that he was with this loathsome, tacky, manipulative, nasty, cruel bitch because she looked good back then and seemed to be on a ride to fame.

        As for never looking back, he was apparently fucking Donkey while dating his fiancee. Again, to me, that’s gross on so many levels. And also would create serious issues about trust if I were in her situation.

      • FaFail Waldorf says:

        Wasn’t the overlap like two months during the early dating stage? Anyway, gotcha. No donk peen near you. Good luck finding a dude who has never dated a chick for her (sometimes former) looks alone. They’re out there, probably playing Dungeouns and Dragons.

      • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        I have no idea how long the overlap was, but the idea of a guy dating me and supposedly getting closer to me while fucking his ex is something I find totally repulsive.

        I hate to disillusion you, but not every good-looking woman is a nasty, evil, mentally ill bitch. Then again, my lack of respect for Michael has more to do with the fact that he overlooked what a sick, nasty cunt she is, which is something he almost certainly would not have done if she looked like she does now.

        In other words, of course everyone wants to be with an attractive partner and most of us, at one time or another, date someone solely or mainly because of that. BUT what makes it repugnant is when serious defects are overlooked because of good looks.

        Do you understand that, or do I need to put into smaller words for you?

      • FaFail Waldorf says:

        Lol, don’t trip over your soapbox there, pumpkin. I comprehend your 10th-grade vocabulary just fine, no need to be a smug bitch about it.

        I completely accept your judgement of Michael (and his fiancee, if you have any for her), and reserve my right to disagree.

        Moving on.

      • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        Of course, dear. That’s why you felt compelled to dive right in and lamely attempt to condescend to me. Riiiiight. You’re the one who took it to a level of snide personal attack.

        If you think anyone is being a smug bitch, all you need to do is look in the mirror.

      • FaFail Waldorf says:

        I’m not sure where I dove (the Dungeouns and Dragons dig? I stand by it, but I’ll apologize if you want) but from what I can tell you responded to MY response to SOMEONE ELSE, which was in slight defense of the innocent-party fiancee, and lectured me for a while about how Men Who Previously Dated Bitches Are Bad So I Should Hate Them. So whatever. You can win, I don’t care.

        Reflection in my mirror’s pretty and getting a dude to pay for dinner tonight, how’s yours?

      • Mad Yoga Skillz, Super Saggers & Creepy Daddy Issues says:

        When there are so many levels of nested replies, it can be difficult to see precisely to whom one is addressing comments.

        My reflection is just fine, and I’m secure enough in what I have to not feel the need to constantly brag about how WONDERFUL my life is, as some people here are prone to do.

    • Jacy says:

      That’s totally unfair. She may have sent it to one person, as far as I know, and why assume it’s her? Maybe he sent it around too.

      And who wouldn’t? If some notorious asshole sent something like that to me, you’d better believe I’d forward it to my closest friends and say “Can you believe this cunt?” And if I was a protective friend of hers, I might have got it to her hate site as well.

      Completely, utterly unfair to pin any blame for this on her.

  67. Julia's 4th Nose says:

    Girlfriend has serious issues. And her timeline makes no sense.

    She says that they broke up at the end of 2006 because she said no to spending New Years with him. http://julia.nonsociety.com/post/20988660 She says:

    “He tried so hard, for so long. He thought if he just loved me enough, he could fix me. But I had to fix myself. Finally, after Christmas, he flew to Chicago to try to convince me to spend new years with him. And I said no. That was it for him. He had been trying for almost a year by then, and he was tired and he was sad. He found someone else, he’s still dating her, and by all accounts they’re happy.

    I’m glad he’s happy. He deserves it. But more than anything, I want to tell him I’m sorry. I want to tell him how much I appreciated everything he did for me for the year and a half we were best friends. I want to tell him that I understand – finally – how horrible he must have felt, and that I would give anything to have been the normal, emotionally healthy Julia I am today, so I could have shown my love for him as much as he showed his for me.

    But he won’t call me back.”

    What a cunt machine. Why would he return your calls? You said yourself that he’s happy with his new girlfriend and you still tried to insert yourself into his life. And we’re supposed to believe that her goal was really just to APOLOGIZE? Not to break up a relationship? Let’s face it, she’s been trying to break up this relationship since at least mid-2007.

    In another post (/post/64236578), she says:

    “I loved him very much, but I ended it, and I’ve missed him almost every day since (he cut off all contact, which was devastating to me). I no longer allow myself to think about him. It’s too painful.”

    But then in another post (/post/45125399) she says that she got the navel ring as a sign of commitment to Michael in May 2007. And here (/post/559117485), she says she got the navel ring in March 2007. And she adds in the recent after-he-got-engaged post, which she totally embellished:

    “Backstory: At the time I met him, a year before, in January of 2006, I had been in monogamous relationships since I was a junior in college – without a single break in between – with James, then Jon, then Alex (and I lived with both Jon & Alex). When I met Michael, I fell so hard and so fast for him, I couldn’t imagine being with anyone else … but I also knew that to enter into another monogamous relationship at that time would be a disaster. We were so serious about one another, so in love, that we were both convinced we would get married. We even looked at rings … When I was going through the toughest time – even years after we ended things – I used to reread the love letters he sent me about getting married. They still break my heart.”

    She says they were convinced they were going to get married, but before the engagement she made it seem like she knew that she wasn’t ready and that it wasn’t going anywhere. Totally revisionist history. “And yet, I gave nothing back. I had just had three years of non-stop, incredibly heart-wrenching drama in my relationships, and I had just left my boyfriend of two years, with whom I was living and who I thought at one time I would marry. I was so fucked up that I literally felt like I had nothing left to give. I was numb.”

    So. I’m confused. Based on what she wrote, she met him in January 2006 and dumped him in December 2006 before New Years. She says that he cut off all communication at that point. But then she got the navel ring as a sign of commitment to him in either March or May 2007, and he was there with her. Then she claims she last saw him in June 2007, but then they slept together through summer 2007. What??

    Also, she says she basically didn’t give a fuck about him because she was “numb,” didn’t give anything to him, and never thought about anything more serious with him after being super serious about Alex. But then she says later that they looked at rings, talked about marriage, etc. What? Is wrong with her?

    The part that’s the saddest is when she says that she’s glad he’s happy and that he deserves happiness. And that she really appreciates him and wants to apologize and thank him for being there for her. And this email? This is how she thanks him? By telling his fiancee (um er oops) that they were sleeping together (blindfolded, I guess since she wasn’t physically seeing him) and he was telling her he loved her while he was dating the fiancee?

    Everyone’s right. She is absolutely vile.

    PS Based on everything she’s done, how is this NOT stalking?

    • Mini Driver says:

      Thanks for doing the research, 4th Nose. I was curious about how the story has morphed over time.

    • melissa sue, the darling intern says:

      4th Nose, I can’t answer for most of this (because I really don’t understand her lies half the time) but I think I can speak to this:

      Also, she says she basically didn’t give a fuck about him because she was “numb,” didn’t give anything to him, and never thought about anything more serious with him after being super serious about Alex. But then she says later that they looked at rings, talked about marriage, etc. What? Is wrong with her?

      They probably did look at rings and talk marriage. And she probably WAS numb, not feeling much about him. Reason being, she doesn’t care about finding a man to love and be with for the rest of her life (she may think she does, but she clearly doesn’t understand what ‘give and take’ is); all she cares about is marriage. To someone with money. So, even if she wasn’t entirely feeling it, she was going through the motions, maybe even somewhat excitedly.

    • Jacy says:

      Shopping for engagement rings with Michael = totally fabricated, a lie designed to hurt his fiancee. She completely made it up.

      • bettedavis says:

        I’m glad someone finally brought this up. I was really puzzled when she reposted that navel-piecing video because I thought she said she’d parted ways with Michael on New Years.

        Remember this from her Mediabistro profile?

        “Ok, so in December I met this guy Stephen who is Candace Bushnell’s ex. And he flew me to his place in South Africa for New Years,” says Allison. She taps her foot, waiting for her curling iron to heat up. “And it’s weird, but if you google “Julia Allison and stripper pole,’ you will find images because he had a stripper pole in his basement. I mean it was the wrong size so I didn’t do it. But I didn’t sleep with him, but I met [Men’s Health editor-in-chief] David Zinczenko there who I’d met before. So a little while after I got back, I went down to the Super Bowl. And while I was in Miami I met Milo Ventimiglia, he’s on Heroes. I totally fell in love.”

        “Where was I? Ok, but then Stephen flew me down to St. Barts for Valentine’s Day,” says Allison holding the iron tight for a half a minute. “But when I wouldn’t sleep with him, he got really pissed and wanted to throw me out of the villa. But his brother is sweet and tried to get me to stay. But it was Valentine’s Day and I called David and said ‘I’m coming back to New York and you’re taking me out for dinner. We ended up having the nicest dinner at Elaine’s with Col Allan and his wife.”

        Her hair recoiled; Allison sits down at her desk and refreshes the screen of her pink-lined laptop. She checks her email and sighs. “God, Fox wants me to talk about pro or con did Britney’s MTV thing ruin her career. Duh.” She looks again and exhales. “Thank God, I got pro.”

        Allison picks the thread back up after a few minutes of concentration. “Ok, then a couple days I later, I flew out to spend some time with Milo, and that was fun, but two days later after I leave I see him on television canoodling with Emmy Rossum. I was like, ‘whatever.'”

        For a moment, she looks sad, and hugs herself, but it quickly passes. “Then Stephen’s brother flew in from London to see me, but I blew him off. But I didn’t know he was flying in just to see me until he took me to Milan in June. Well, it was actually Lake Como. Hmm, I don’t know if his brother knows that.”

        Now re-dressed in a simple black skirt and white blouse — “H&M, but don’t tell anyone” — Allison grabs her purse and slams the door. As the elevator draws her back down to earth, she is lost in thought for about a tenth of a second. “I’m not sure why I told you all that. Sometimes, I can’t help myself.”

        Okay. Bracing myself here … The way I see it, she dumped Alex in the Jamba Juice in summer 2006, a few months after she’d met Michael, and Alex eventually moved out out of the apartment. Michael took her to the Gawker Halloween party. By June 2007, she was on Fox regularly as a TONY columnist. She was going to all sorts of parties and living it up a single female with Leven and all those blonde talking heads. Let’s not forget that she got her San Francisco geek freak on with Meghan in summer 2007, right after she got the Star gig. She also moved into the pink palace in summer 2007, shortly after she started dating Jakob. Sounds like she was banging dudes left and right in that time period between Alex and Jakob, during her supposed love affair with Michael. She had no intention of committing to Michael and only realized what she had after he had gotten serious with his now-fiance.

        What a whore. Shameless.

      • bettedavis says:

        “In 2006, I was ending one relationship and starting another, but they overlapped a bit (oops). I took one home to Chicago for the holidays without telling the other and lost ten years from my life when the second guy flew in and surprised me—at the place I was having lunch with the first guy. I didn’t spend New Year’s with either, but flew to South Africa instead. With a third guy.”

        http://newyork.timeout.com/articles/sex-dating/69514/i-got-dumped-on-xmas#ixzz0puQOfhCy

      • Julia's 4th Nose says:

        Confused. Who was the 2nd guy to overlap? Because I thought Dave the Fingerbanger wasn’t until 2007.

        Or was the 2nd guy Michael and the 1st guy Alex?

        Can’t keep her fucking men straight.

  68. whatever says:

    wow. Wow. WOW. This girl is pathetic.

  69. Afghani Facebook "Friend" says:

    best RBNS thread ever. i had forgotten about this.

    completely damning. she’s so far beyond help it’s not funny.

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